Open Shell

Today, started rocky. Can’t even lie. I did live video on Facebook explaining to my friends, family, and followers why my personality has changed a bit (go to my personal page on FB to see the video, if you’d like). In the video, I spoke about the dog attack (was our dog). This is when my depression & anxiety spread like a wildfire. I had to take sleeping pills the first week afterward because I would wake up screaming from a nightmare. The whole situation was bad from the start and ended with me hurt & him having to be put down for the attack. The littlest things make me cry because I truly miss Deuce. We have a doggy door in the house and every time I walk by it, I get teary-eyed. Going to Starbucks makes me sad because he was my ‘riding buddy’. We would take Christopher to school then head to Starbucks drive-thru. Can’t do that anymore. I have anxiety any time I go there now. I am afraid they are going to ask about my dog and where he’s been lately. If they do, I think I will have a breakdown right then and there.

It is so hard to lose a pet, especially, when the loss is euthanization for attacking you. He will forever be in my heart.