With This Report We Go Long And Short!

We have a story for you today. It will be short so you can be on your way. Yeah, it really won't take very long. This post can do no wrong. You will be ready to go soon. You can trust, not really, this rhyming loon.

There was a guy,
That couldn't fly.
But he had such pride,
That he jumped from a plane ride.

The plane was big.
The pilot danced a jig.
There was a pig.
Some woman even had a wig.

The wig was blonde.
Hard to see beyond.
I think it was cat hair.
Not sure at my lair.

My lair is great.
I'm sure you can relate.
I can't get enough.
It has all my stuff.

My stuff is fine.
Loved by the feline.
Towers and furry balls.
Chase those down the halls.

The halls are narrow.
Oh look, a sparrow.
Not the Captain Jack one.
How many of those have been done?

Do they need any more?
They are such a bore.
One and done would have been nice.
But can't roll those dice.

Have you ever rolled dice?
They can come at a price.
They can take all your money.
That sure isn't funny.

Don't you think it funny?
Funny in a rainy day not sunny.
The sun is shining too.
Or maybe that was yesterday's view.

Oh right, the report.
Well to make a long story short.
He jumped from the plane ride,
And then he went kersplat and died.

Didn't you love my short story? The end wasn't too gory. Hey, I made the long story short. What? I never had other things to report. I never jabbered on about this and that. Hmm long story short kinda fell flat? Shouldn't it be long story shorter? Leave out things like every news reporter. Some humans are sure blabbermouths in mass. Glad I'm not a long-winded little rhyming ass.

Enjoy your winter, smash a printer.