Effing Feline blows up Hollywood
I, Effing Feline, remember when a car exploded in the alley behind Mr Valentine’s house. True story — would I lie to you?
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An explosion and a flying cable car from “The Rock” (1996).
The car was stolen, abandoned, and set on fire. When the gas exploded — and here’s the thing — it sounded like a gas oven being lit, thwump, and flames shot up no more than six or eight tail lengths. That’s all. The only damage it did to us innocent bystanders was to melt a plastic garbage can.
In other words, it was absolutely nothing like when Hollywood cars explode.
Keep that in mind as you read this snippet from Rescuing Prince Charming. Dusty Johnson, a tech writer working on Earth’s first starship, has helped a Kwadran find a saboteur’s time bomb. After he throws the bomb into the ocean they wait for the explosion.
But just as disappointment threatened to chill her, the dark waters of the Pacific erupted as though a school of sea monsters had farted simultaneously. Dusty jerked closer to the stranger. He was warm and alive and his courage took her breath away. Being held by him seemed the most natural thing in the world.
The explosion’s noise, when it reached her a millisecond later, was anticlimactic. If this were a movie, special effects people would’ve added a louder bang and more fireworks. Movie explosions were impressive, not realistic.
Effing Feline here again. Even we cats know that Hollywood lies. Why, Hollywood even pretends that Garfield is nothing but a cartoon. Lies, I tell you, lies, lies, lies!
Be sure to visit other writers in the Weekend Writing Warriors and Snippet Sunday.
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Rescuing Prince Charming
Alien Contact for Idiots, book four
She’s no heroine. He’s no Prince Charming.
Dusty Johnson, a self-styled ordinary, everyday woman, responds with extraordinary heroism when saboteurs try to bomb the prototype of Earth’s first starship. Although she yearns to return to anonymity, that moment of courage propels her ever deeper into dangers that tear the scabs off her dark secrets—and thrust her into the arms of the unattainable man of her dreams.
Reese Eaglesbrood, an alien prince, yearns to restore his tattered reputation by guiding the starship project to completion, but his fascination with the unassuming heroine threatens to undermine his fragile authority. Shunning Dusty is necessary, yet unthinkable—and when the saboteurs strike again, she is his only ally against Earth’s most elusive enemies.
