One of 40 — Reading 2018
by Jeannie Vanasco
My son and daughter-in-law often sign up for the Goodreads challenge and read numerous books in a year. I don’t think I’ve kept up with them and I’ve also done a poor job of keeping track of the ones I have read. This year, I’ve decided — hesitantly — to join them. I don’t want my reading to feel like “homework” and I don’t want to beat myself up if I don’t keep up the proper pace. Also, I don’t know how to track the other reading that I do — I tend to read a great number of essays and short stories in literary journals during the year, but there’s no way to track that. Hopefully — fingers crossed — I will do better this year with tracking the books I’ve read. My first book for 2018, The Glass Eye: A Memoir by Jeannie Vanasco.
This brilliant memoir is a study in love, grief, obsession and the progressive development of a severe mental illness.
In fragments focused on herself, her father, mother, dead half-sibling (also named Jeanne/ie) and mental illness, Vanasco takes our hand and leads us down a rabbit-hole of obsession and grief following her father’s death. An only child, Jeannie, was especially close with her much older dad.
You might guess this work would be horrific and morbid. It’s not. It is unflinching and honest. The Glass Eye gave me the best sense of what obsession and severe mania can do to someone; yet, there is always an element of hope. (Remember, hope is my word for the month of January. It’s not why I chose The Glass Eye as my first book. I almost passed on it thinking it couldn’t possibly feel hopeful.) We know, since the book exists, that she survived her unraveling and finished the book. I thoroughly enjoyed the sections which were self-analytical about her writing process, but do wonder how much readers who don’t also write would enjoy them (thus 4 stars instead of 5 on Goodreads) — I’m not able to judge if they are overdone, since I found them fascinating.
If you’re not yet on Goodreads, but you are a regular reader, you might consider joining. It’s a great place to track books you want to read and share your thoughts on ones you have read. If you want to follow the books I have listed there, go here.
One of 40 — Reading 2018 was originally published in Pam Writes on Medium, where people are continuing the conversation by highlighting and responding to this story.
