Dungeon Landlord 003

In Pursuit of the Ultimate Cheat, I Reluctantly Became a Dungeon (Land)Lord
3 - Know ThyselfCalm down. Calm down. Calm. Calm. CALM THE FUCK DOWN!!!!AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHOK. Let’s recap.I’m in a foreign world. I’m a slime.With crap stats. I said it in the way that it’s obvious it would have been OK to reincarnate as a slime if only my stats weren’t nonsense. This is way too unfair though. I mean, as a slime, I can’t even be expected to be able to use tools. Hell, I don’t even have hands!I tried to focus on the sensation of rolling around the ground. How exactly am I moving? I will it and my body starts rolling. I don’t think I have eyes, but I can see everything around . . . well, I can see EVERYTHING around me. I may not have eyes in the back of my head but I can definitely “see” out of the back of my head. If I focus, I can even get a sense of the inside of my body . . . pretty barren at the moment. Acquiring some sense of my own body, I use my will to push part of what I’ll refer to as my stomach out and away. SUCCESS! A tenuous pseudopod extended out. Willing another pseudopod out from what I’ll refer to as my back and YES! I now have arms.Well, pseudo-arms.. . . Hands are still beyond me.And.For some reason.My consciousness feels kinda’ thin. Right now. A strange sensation that I might once have described as panic is welling up inside. Slap! My two pseudopodious arms smack back into my back and stomach and are reabsorbed.At once, my higher cognitive processes kickstart.Ugh, I think I was pretty close to going from “intelligent slime” to just “slime”. So let’s keep the pseudobody experiment on the backburner. Speaking of backburner. Food would be great.Do slimes even need to eat? I mean, what exactly am I made out of? Is it some sort of fat? Jelly? Am I actually a flan and that’s not just a bad joke? Is my body LCL? Liquefied organs? I don’t really have a sense of light. Looking around, I appear to be in a cave.Well, maybe cave is too grandiose. I’m in a hole. It’s about ten meters square. Err, um round.Well, cavey round, you know? The widest part is about ten meters. There aren’t any particular rock formations. From the center of the hole, I can “look” up and see a passageway to hell-if-I-know-where. That’s it. “I’M SUPPOSED TO BE LORD OF A DUNGEON AND INSTEAD I’M LORD OF A HOLE?! THAT DAMN GENIE COULDN’T EVEN GET THAT PART, RIGHT?!”Whoa, I was so pissed off my thoughts literally spit out of me. The force of the slime churning inside of me formed enough sound for a voice to get out. Yuck, that was gross. Let’s shuffle, err, slime away from that mess . . . “Greetings, Master.”If I had eyes, they’d be pretty wide-open right now.
Name: ProtaPlayer: UnknownRace: Intelligent slimeGender: NeutralAge: 30 minutes
Str: 1→2Mot: 2Spd: 1Apt: 1Hea: 1Cre: 1End: 1Log: 1Dex: 1Cha: 1Agi: 0Ego: 0→1

Abilities: Creature Creation; Dungeon Terrain; Tackle; Pseudopod(“Not like I can really use pseudopod effectively though”)New Achievements: Last Second Save - Narrowly avoided a self-inflicted lobotomy. (“How close was it?!”)
Vomit Out Words - Manifested a voice through churning liquids. (“Now I get an achievement for throwing up? Please don’t remind me!”)