Rolling Down The Hill

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Now, if any of my Weight Watcher friends see the title and then see the picture, they will get what I’m talking about and I love them for that. For those that don’t WW with me, I have a tale to tell . . .

When I was growing up, the thought or talk of weight was never an issue for me as I was lean and strong. Weight ended up being a topic after my mom had her third child and there was also a shift in the world of body image. This started, in my opinion, because of concentration camp looking people like Twiggy, where starvation began to be worshiped. They also came out with Diet Pepsi and my mom went to town on this drink however, in the end, she literally went insane and had to give the stuff up lest she kill her three children. True story. It’s in my first book on Amazon called ‘Something Dreamy This Way Comes.’

I never knew a fat kid and I remember not really knowing a fat grown up, except for some of the nuns that taught at our school. I think there was a whole lotta resentment for some of these gals as I understand that some of them were forced into the nunnery. I’d eat too, trust me.

So, as society began to change, weight began to be talked about more and more, which is grotesquely ironic considered the restaurant portions began to grow considerably. In addition, the idiot food people, to get more money, began doing poisonous things to our foods like hormones, pesticides, GMO’S, MSG, etc. This began to alter our very DNA, hence, all of the genetic disorders and incredible rise in autism and ADHD.

Our society began to implode on itself with all of the mess that we were putting into our bodies, the amount we were putting into it, and technology didn’t help the matter either as more and more people began to ‘sit’ a lot more in front of their glorified technologies of choice. Fewer people would be seen outside playing, walking, jogging, etc.

We were being done in, yes by society, but by ourselves too, y’all. I am one of those people.

I was 5’6″ and weighed a healthy 140 no matter if I pigged out or if I starved myself. I worked out 4 times per week. I was in good shape.

Well, throw in a couple of kids, inject my food with poison therefore causing me to have a leaky gut, add gravity, little time to work-out, and a dying metabolism . . .

At 38 years old, for the first time in my life, I began to struggle with weight. This was something I had NEVER thought about prior, though society kept trying to eat its way into my head. I gained and lost this ’38’ weight, as I call it, but it wasn’t done with me just yet.

At 40, my marriage finally finally unraveled and I was the heaviest I’d ever been. I won’t throw out the number because you wouldn’t believe it if I told you. Sadness and abuse has a way of pushing you deeper and deeper into that pantry.

After my divorce, I got back down to my ideal weight. This would be the 3rd time I had to lose it and each time, a bit more of the ‘fat’ family reunion were invited and showed up.

After meeting and marrying the love of my life, I put on what I like to call the ‘love chub.’ Actually, we both did. When I met the Professor, he was cut like you wouldn’t believe and wow, is all I can really say. He felt the same of me as I really worked at it and was satisfied with the results.

Well, being in love renders you blind so you stop working-out because you figure the incredibly frequent sex is doing the job, you eat a lot of pizza, and eat A LOT of chips, salsa, and margaritas. As the years go by, you find you have put that exact stinking weight on and then some AGAIN, damn it!

I was at my all time heaviest back in July 2016 when I started WW with my mom. She had about given up on WW but I made her go because I was tired of her whining about her weight too.

I managed to lose 42 of the 47 pounds I wanted to lose and then, about 2 months ago when I got insanely busy adding bits to my holistic practice, I tripped and began rolling down the ‘hill.’ Now, I have told this story a few times during my meetings at WW and EVERYONE gets it. Here’s what it means . . .

I explained to everyone that I had rolled all the way down the hill and into the mother-load of chips, salsa, and margaritas and there I stayed for the last 2 years, hence my weight gain aka the love chub. My WW people squeal with laughter as do I.

Now, I have rolled down the hill again but luckily this time there is a little ledge that has caught me about half-way down and there is a pile of chips and salsa and about 12 margaritas and yes, I am enjoying them but as I stand on the edge of this little ledge, I see the sea of chips, salsa, and margaritas below and I shudder as I DO NOT want to be down there again.

I was 5 pounds away from my goal and now I’m 20, I think. I haven’t even looked because I’m so pissed off at myself . . . BUT I WILL NOT GIVE UP AGAIN, NOPE!

The Professor gently reminds me how hard I have worked and tells me that he doesn’t want to see me go backwards. I have to ‘gently’ remind him that this is none of his business but I know he just gives a damn so there’s that.

My hope for all of you is to NEVER GIVE UP and know that you are not alone in this damn food addiction we all have and if you are fed up like I was, I encourage you to take a look at WW and maybe consider it. Its good, healthy, and sensible. I pray for all of us to never give up and stay the course and if we begin to roll down the hill, I pray there is a little ledge and we are able to get the vantage point of what lies below and it scares the hell outta us and pushes us back up that hill.

One thing to remember though, your heart and mind make up who you are, not your chub so get that outta your head right now people!

Love y’all!!♥