A Shopper's Guide to the Friday Apocalypse

"Excuse me..."

I ignore the comment. 

"Ummmm....excuse me..."

Still ignoring.

Tap on the shoulder, so naturally, I must turn. 

"You cut me in line."

(There may be some sort of eye roll involved on my end.)

"I think you're mistaken," I say. "I was here first."

I turn away, but there's yet another tap on my shoulder. Oh. My. God.

"Listen," I begin, holding back the most unholy of frustrations. "I don't know what you think happened, but you're literally one place in line behind me. It's not a big deal....