Let’s get real, people!
Enough bullsh*t! Enough judging! I am sick and tired of tiptoeing around mental illness. I am sick and tired of the stares, the judgments and the expectations of society. Bite me! I am doing the best I can. That’s all I can do. So tired of hearing, “Oh, I’m so sorry you are going through this, but God only gives us as much as we can handle.” I got it; however, it doesn’t exactly help me with the issue at hand. (I’m not knocking anyone’s religion. I am simply saying that parents/guardians/caregivers of special needs children/adults don’t need to hear your ‘pep’ talk. We need you to either step in and help or find us help. We don’t need you to attempt to sprinkle glitter on the situation, because no matter how much glitter you sprinkle it is still a shitty situation. You’re making glittery shit. Congrats!
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You may think you are helping, but you really aren’t. That’s just the truth. That is what thousands of caregivers of special needs children/adults want to say to you. They may even want to tell you to f*ck off or shove it up your ass. I know there have been numerous times that I have wanted to say these things; however, social ‘etiquette’ has kept my mouth shut. Keeping my mouth shut turns me into a ticking time bomb. I never know whether I am going to explode into tears or explode into a full out Hulk tantrum with the F-bomb being dropped on every unexpected victim. My own medication for depression and such only helps me so much with handling life. That’s just reality. No need for me to sugar coat my life and act like I’m mentally stable after dealing with all of the heartache and struggles of raising my son with autism and mood disorder (he makes the hulk look like a fuzzy kitten, when he is having an outburst/tantrum).
My parenting sucks? No, your judgmental bullsh*t sucks. Myself and thousands of other caregivers in my situation are doing our best. There isn’t a magical pill that we can give our child/adult & make them magically become ‘normal’ by society’s definition. If there was one, I’m sure the majority of us would be fighting to get in that line to purchase it. The next time you see someone out in public and they are struggling with their child, don’t just assume that they are bad parents or that their child is a bad ass! Maybe that parent is at their wits end because their child is unable to control their behavior, even on the maximum dose that is allowed for their age & body. I am so sick and tired of seeing these videos and posts about how so-and-so saw a kid cutting up and their parent couldn’t control them. Well, no shit Sherlock. Let me tell you something. When my son is at his worst state of outburst/meltdown, he becomes a damn bull and I’m lucky if it doesn’t take a FEW grown ass adults to hold him down. Hell, I watched him throw four hospital security guards around like they were rag dolls. So don’t give me the bullshit on how I should be able to control my child. Shit, tell his brain, not me. Think you can do a better job? Then take him home with you! I will be sitting in your driveway for when you bring him back outside 2 minutes later.
[image error]“Why don’t you go out and give yourself a break?” That’s another damn thing I am tired of hearing! OMG! If it was that easy, then I would have already done it! Duh! Autism mixed with mood disorder is like making that science experiment in middle school with the baking soda that turns into a volcano. Remember that experiment? You think nothing is going to happen, so let your guard down then BOOM! Shit is everywhere. That is what it is like watching my son. It takes the bravest to handle him, because he is a ticking time bomb, a jack-in-a-box, volcano experiment, shaken soda, etc.
Parents/guardians/caregivers of special needs children/adults, let’s stop holding things in.
You want to cry? Cry. You want to scream? Scream! It’s okay to lose your shit in the middle of Wal-Mart, when you can no longer take the stares. (I don’t recommend violent acts towards others. That means bail money. Very costly.)
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This was me the other day at the NBA Summer Championship game on Monday —->
If you want to go in your room and scream into your pillow, that’s okay too. Even superheroes are allowed to cry, have bad days and be angry.
Recommendation: I have recently joined a few Facebook groups and it is so nice to see what other people are going through (not that I wish it upon them). It is nice to know that I am not alone. You should try joining some groups too. It is nice to vent about my shitty day, my weakest moments, or a good day. It is nice to be me. It is nice to say all of my thoughts out loud and not worry about being judged! It is a breath of fresh air.
If you ever need to vent (even if you don’t have a special needs child/adult in yours life), I am here always! I mean that to everyone! No one should have to feel alone. Everyone should have someone. I’m all for being that person. ❤
Happy Reading & Thanks For Listening to Me Vent!
S.E.Isaac
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