I should know better. I just flippin' should.
Fer crap's sake, I'm almost 41 years old. I've lived in three major metropolitan areas and traveled extensively. I've worked over 40 different jobs - everything from driving a forklift to processing payroll for television shows and movies to tending bar for drunken Chicagoans to directing plays to managing large software implementation projects. I've been in back-alley fights and wrestled a cafe's tip jar away from a rotten little shit that tried to steal it. I've written books. I've flunked out of college, and then 15 years later, graduated summa cum laude with a 4.0 GPA. I've done 10-mile adventure races and triathlons and marathons. I followed a girl to Italy to win her back (didn't go so good). I proposed to a woman in a karaoke bar (went great - we've been married almost 10 years now).
You'd think that with all of that life experience, I would have picked up a little self-awareness. A little sense of who I am and what makes me tick. And you'd be right. I like to believe that I know myself pretty damn well.
So why in the hell would I spend my Thursday morning trying to cram a huge and sloppy data set into meaningful Excel pivot tables and charts, when I knew - I KNEW - that I had an interview that afternoon? Why would I intentionally make myself crabby when I knew that I'd have to turn on the wit and charm, be poised and professional, be ready to answer tough questions, so I could make a good impression?
Face-palm. Straight-up face-palm.
I work for the State of Minnesota. The state has this great program that's put on in conjunction with the University of Minnesota's Humphrey School of Public Affairs called the Emerging Leaders Institute. It's a really cool opportunity to not only learn some snazzy leadership skills, but to also develop great relationships with other folks working in state government. I applied last year and wasn't selected for an interview. But this year, I was. And the interview was Thursday.
And I worked with Excel pivot tables and charts beforehand.
Perhaps I should explain. I HATE Excel pivot tables and charts. Especially when the source data is crap. I get all Hulky. My blood pressure goes up. I pound on my desk. I blurt out onomatopoeias like a prehistoric sportscaster doing a play by play of a Neanderthal's fight with a saber tooth tiger.
So picture me all dressed for success, but ready to put my head through a wall.
Well... The interview happened. I didn't swear. I didn't get all cynical. I didn't hit anything or anyone. I tried, I really, really tried to be calm, poised, professional, funny, charming, competent, and all the other wonderful things I'm pretty good at faking when I have to ;-)
Did I pull it off? I have no idea. Won't know until later next week. But I do know this...
The next time I need to bring my A-game to an interview, I will absolutely, definitely, positively NOT work on an Excel pivot chart or table.
I'll get pizza instead, watch some Buffy the Vampire Slayer...
And I will absolutely NAIL that interview.