Help! Someone Just Dropped a Bag of Zucchini at My Door

This time of year I'm reminded of Garrison Keillor's Lake Wobegone tale. There's so much late-summer zucchini in this small town that, under cover of night, people are surreptitiously leaving big paper bags of it on people's porches. You walk out to get the paper in the morning—and you've been zucchini-ed. Sometimes I get the...