Not So Nice Guys Finish First
You're a good person (because you're one of our readers, so obviously). You work hard all week at your crappy job (or maybe you love your job, but you're working hard) to make ends meet, maybe save a little for a rainy day, if things are going well. Meanwhile…[image error]
Kim Kardashian's on her honeymoon, having just made 18 million for her lavish wedding. Yep. Most of us go into debt just to have a ceremony we'll remember, or we go easy on the frills so that we don't have to go into debt to get married. Kim K makes money off it. Big money. Who watches this krap? Why does anyone kare? Because once upon a time, Kim banged R & B singer Brandy's brother and broadcast it to the world, plus her father was OJ's friend with the white Bronco and her stepdad is Bruce Jenner, and she was friends with Paris Hilton. [image error]
Here's the wedding $$$ breakdown, according to E!, who pushes Kim and family in our faces to make up for their investment:
Payments the happy couple received
* $15 million plus profit for four-hour, two-part wedding special on E!
* $2.5 million for exclusive photos with People magazine
* $300,000 for exclusive engagement announcement with People
* $100,000 for exclusive rights to bridal shower with Britain's OK! mag
* $50,000 to have bachelorette party at Tao in Las Vegas
Stuff they got for free
* $15,000 to $20,000 Hansen's Bakery wedding cake
* $20,000 Vera Wang wedding dress and fittings
* $40,000 for two more Vera Wang evening dresses
* $400,000 in Perrier Jouet Champagne
* $150,000 in hair and makeup for photo shoots and TV "home video"
* $10,000 in Lehr & Black wedding invitations
Deeply discounted
* $2 million 20.5-carat engagement ring and $1 million wedding bands by jeweler Lorraine Schwartz. The amount they paid for these items hasn't been revealed, but it's much less than their worth.
Krazy! And in the NYT this weekend, I was reading about Detroit's former mayor Kwame Kilpatrick. Kwame is just out of jail for lying under oath, among other things, and he's facing racketeering and bribery charges, among other things. But he has a new book out, so he scores the NYT interview, where he's posing in what look like expensive clothes. Nice. Krime, it apparently pays. Oh yes it does.
I have a new book coming out. Where's my NYT interview? I guess I'll have to rob a bank, make a sex tape, or get elected to public office then lie, cheat, and sleep with my assistant. (Grave Expectations, on August 30- pick it up!).
Well, maybe things are looking up. Abercrombie and Fitch just tried to pay Jersey Shore star The Situation not to wear their clothes. Awesome! Now, if you're so bad you're actually distasteful, you can get paid to not do things, like wear name brand clothes. I can think of a lot of brands I wouldn't wear for money. Now I'll have to get famous for being especially disgusting to the general public, and ka-ching!
Then Apple can pay me not to write on my MacBook Pro. Asics can fork it over for me to stop walking around in their comfy running shoes. LL Bean, you better start writing checks to keep me out of your classic khakis. Come on Whiners, let's go bad. Really really bad. Who's up for some public inebriation?
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