7 Questions to Ask before You Say "I Do" (Part 1)

I think talking about money before you tie the knot is a no-brainer. I'm often surprised by the people who don't want to broach this subject with their partners. Whether they're afraid it'll ruin the romance or they would really rather not know, folks enter into what they hope will be the longest relationship of their lives without much information.

If you have a partner who seems reluctant to share, you may have to make like Sherlock Holmes to gather the information you need. Not knowing is far worse than implementing a little strategy to find out what you need to know.

Some of the questions you want answered you don't even have to ask. Let's take the issue of a pocketful of cash: If your soon-to-be-partner walks around with a wallet full of cash is it because he's flaunting his money or is she simply the type who likes to spends gobs without a second thought. Since debit and credit cards (when used correctly) help you track what you're spending, unless your buddy is also walking around with a notebook or keeping track of receipts, cash may leaking through fingers with nary a thought. And with your eyes wide open, you can see this for yourself.

Some things you do have to ask about. Here are the first 2 of 7 questions you should get answers to before you take the walk. Keep in mind you don't have to ask these all at once, leaving your pal feeling like a well-grilled wiener; a question here and a query there will get you all you need to know without scaring the pants off your honey.

1. Where do you bank and how long have you had your account? You can start this conversation off by complaining about your bank's service or by praising it. Bank-bashing has turned into a national pastime so this shouldn't raise any flags. Lenders often want to know how long you've had your chequing account because it speaks to your stability. You, too, should know if buddy has his accounts in order. While you're at it, talk about overdraft protection. If she has it as a precaution but never uses it, she's a smart cookie. If she lives in overdraft, that should be a red flag.

2. Do you have a pension plan at work, or are you saving for your own future? If your girlfriend has neither a pension plan nor any RRSP savings, what is she doing to take care of her future? If your boy has been blowing through his money without a thought to retirement, will you ever be able to convince him that saving is important? And if you can't, how will that affect your long-term plans together? You want a partner who is thinking about the future as well as living in the present. If she just hasn't given any thought to it yet, but is willing, you're one up on the poor sod who is marrying someone who thinks HE is the retirement plan.

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