The Sneeches

This is one of my all-time favorite Dr. Seuss stories. It's comes from another of his compendium of stories and the moral is fabulous: If you don't know what you want, you're gonna get taken to the cleaners, sucker!

The star-belly Sneetches were a proud lot, walking right by the plain-belly Sneetches without saying a word to them all because they had "stars upon thars." Meanwhile, the plain-belly lot can't think of anything but getting into the star-belly parities and hanging out with the snoots.  Sound familiar. It's an age-old problem where the cool folks set the standard and all the Regular Joes look on lustfully. You'd think we'd know better by now. But we don't.

Along comes Sylvester McMonkey McBean with a machine and the desire to take all the money he can off these fools. When the plain-belly Sneetches went into the machine they got stars on their bellies just like the star-belly Sneetches.  Of course, they paid dearly for those stars.

When the star-belly Sneetches saw that the plain-belly Sneetches had stars they were so mad they paid McBean to take off their stars just so they wouldn't be confused with the hoy polloi.  McBean pockets even more money. Then everyone is running in and out of machines, McBean is cleaning up and no one knows who's who. The money runs out and Sylvester McMonkey McBean leaves town. Everyone learns to get along, but only after they're broke and have no other option!

This is what happens when you're a fool so obsessed with the superficial. I can't help but think of my Princesses and the money they'll spend on brand name stuff even as they rack up debt and limit their life options. And I can't help wonder how we could have come so far in the world in terms of our knowledge, but still think that a handbag, a car emblem, or the name on our clothes means anything of significance.

Hey, you can buy all the stars you want if you've got six months' worth of expenses in the bank, you're saving what you'll need for retirement, your debt is all gone (all of it), and your children don't have to worry about how to pay for their post-secondary education. But if you still have some I's to dot and some Ts to cross, throwing money at McBean to run through his star machine is just a way to imitate those who have more money than you.

If I have to have a star on my belly to be your friend, let's just skip it. Imma takin' my plain belly home to people who don't care about crap like that.

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