4 Types of Toxic People to Avoid

There is a wonderful saying that you are a reflection of the five people with whom you spend the most time. It is important that those five people (as well as everyone else) you spend time with are people who positively contribute to your environment and success both personally and professionally. It is important that you surround yourself with people who are not toxic or destructive. Here are four types of toxic people and some tips to stay away:

Needy Nelly – You know her. She wants your time and attention – ALL of it. She is usually a wonderful person but definitely difficult to maintain contact with for long periods of time. Often when you think of her you are reminded of how much of an energy drain she is to you. It is important to either say goodbye to Nelly for good or have really strong boundaries and limited interactions with her to preserve your time and energy.  

Negative Nancy – Remember Eeyore from Winnie the Pooh? Constantly moping about? Negative Nancy has her own personal rain cloud over her all the time. She may also be angry, cynical, pessimistic, and more! You definitely don’t need that in your life. When she is in your midst, preserve your positive space the best you can, smile and exit stage left – as quickly as possible!

Self-Centered Sally – She’s the one that believes that the universe revolves around her. Every conversation you have is immediately redirected so that she’s the center of it.  You have to watch out for her because if you are not careful she may leave you feeling inferior or invisible. You can’t control her selfish behavior and remind yourself that your self-worth is not dependent on her or anyone else. 

Passive-Aggressive Patsy – Perhaps one of the most toxic of the bunch is Passive-Aggressive Patsy. She can be nice and sweet one moment and then stab you in the back in the next. She is generally jealous or insecure and likely prone to gossip. Your best defense here is to avoid her whenever possible and certainly do not trust her.  You may be able to discuss her behavior and how it affects you. Now she probably won’t change but at least you will feel more empowered as long as you honor the boundaries you set with her.

No matter how you choose to respond, know that you are in control of who you choose to engage with and the information you share with them about you and your career.  The more time you spend around these toxic types, the more you will be negatively impacted. Do your best to spend most of your time around positive, uplifting people and your life will be better for it!

 

 

 

 

 

 

Cornelia Shipley, April 2016 Career Coach