David Steele's Blog

How to Double Your Romance with One Way Dates

How do you keep things new and fresh in a long term relationship?

Most couples agree that to continue to experience romance they need to continue “dating” each other but over time, couples can easily develop routines that become ruts.

Does this sound familiar?

Partner #1: “What do you want to do?”
Partner #2: “I don’t know, what do YOU want to do?”

Then they end up doing pretty much the same thing they have done before, the opposite of novelty.

Couples can fall into “compromise ru...

Four Alternatives to Compromise for Resolving Conflict and Relationship Differences

Compromise should be a last resort for resolving differences in a relationship and here’s why:

When you “compromise” you are giving up some of what you want/need to meet in the middle somewhere with your partner. If you do this often enough you will find yourself sacrificing too much to make the relationship work and will resent your partner and be unhappy.

Here’s an example: In my first marriage my wife and I always compromised on movies. She loved “chick flicks” and heartwarming anim...

Twelve Year Anniversary Update

We celebrated our 12th wedding anniversary during a pandemic and a lot has happened since our 10 year anniversary post, so here’s an update.

When the kids went off to college and we had an empty nest, we sold our house and have been living on our boat since 2017. More about that here. This photo is Darlene running RCI (Relationship Coaching Institute) from our cockpit while at anchor.

We traveled up the coast from San Francisco Bay to Puget Sound in Washington in 2019 and have been full time cru...

Radical Marriage Author’s Tenth Wedding Anniversary

This week is our tenth wedding anniversary, a significant milestone for us. Being the authors of Radical Marriage it seems a good idea to share where we are now and where we’re headed.

In 2008 when we were married it was my third marriage and Darlene’s second. Her kids were grown and out of the house and we became a blended family with two of my kids who still lived at home. Darlene was a Registered Nurse who worked at the VA and I worked full time from home running Relationship Coaching Inst...

Living the Radical Life Together

A truly Radical Marriage requires living a radical life together.

How can you live your life to the fullest, with your partner, with the time you have left on this planet?

Your Vision

It all starts with your Vision. If you can’t see or envision it, you can’t accomplish it.

What do you want out of your life?
What do you need to make that happen?

Your vision guides you in choice-making and helps you recognize available opportunities and resources.

Whether you can clearly see it or not, you h...

Radical Marriage at the Library?

We honestly thought Radical Marriage might be a bit too “radical” for libraries, but not according to the Midwest Book Review –

“Strongly recommended and rewarding reading for those who are contemplating getting married, for those already in a committed marriage, and for those whose marriage has failed and are seeking to understand why, Radical Marriage: Your Relationship as Your Greatest Adventure by the husband and wife team of David and Darlene Steele will prove to be invaluable.

As inform...

Join the Radical Marriage Movement!

Despite its historic and important role in our society, the institution of marriage is facing an existential crisis.

As we write this, fewer people are tying the knot, the divorce rate is at an all-time high, and “till death do us part” is becoming a thing of the past. Rather than being associated with the freedom to experience life to the fullest, marriage is seen by more and more individuals as an obsolete anachronism holding them back from living the good life.

Don’t believe us?

Consider t...

I Promise to Choose You First

With all of the distractions, obligations, and personal pursuits in life, it can seem difficult to prioritize your partner. In fact, some believe it is downright impossible.

Huh? How can I possibly choose my partner first? What about my kids? What about my faith? What about my interests? What about ME?

In Chapter Two of Radical Marriage we highlight the Five Promises of Radical Commitment. In our view, this forms the cornerstone of any couple seeking to go beyond happily ever after. While each...

Test Your Radical Marriage IQ

Just for fun, read the Radical Marriage book and then take this test of your “Radical Marriage IQ.” Enjoy!

1. The word “Radical” in Radical Marriage means:

A. Getting kinky in bed

B. Having more than one partner, like an open marriage

C. Doing away with traditions and customs

D. Different from the usual or traditional

2. Commitment in a Radical Marriage:

A. Is minimized because it ties people down

B. Is paramount and beyond traditional marriage

C. Is the same as traditional marriage

D. Is for five year...

What You See Depends Upon Where You’re Standing and Where You’re Looking

We humans are social creatures. Relationships come quite naturally to us. So you would think that we would not only be able to make them work, but we would be really good at them. But it’s not so simple.

There are seven billion people on this planet. Some of them are easy for you to get along with and you would love to have as your friend. Others are just plain difficult for you to be around. On top of it all you have family relationships to deal with, which creates a whole new set of challeng...