Shiloh Walker's Blog, page 147

Locked in Silence… #Grimm

Dying is hard enough. Coming back to life is brutal.

Grimm's Circle, Book 5

Vanya has been hunting and killing demons ever since one of them scarred her face and killed her sister. Correction—since she was forced to kill the demon possessing her sister.

Then some sort of angel offers her a deal she can't refuse—that if she becomes one of them, she gets to kill even more demons. Tonight, she's made that choice. The death she smells on the air will be her own—and she welcomes it.

Silence feels a darkness is looming. Change—something he has every reason not to welcome. The deeply hidden memories that robbed him of his past, of his own name, render him unfit to teach anyone the ways of the Grimm. Yet here he is in the dankest sex club in town, waiting to assume his charge—after he stands by and watches her die.

When Vanya awakes, their complicated, dangerous dance begins. And so does something else—a searing need that blisters along their unexpected mental connection. Silence shouldn't be drawn to his student, but once they touch, he can't think of a reason to stop. Even though acting out their darkest desires puts them in more danger than they realize.

Warning: This book contains sex-starved demons, lonely angels, demon-angel sandwiches, blood, violence, death and a happy-ever-after.

"Can you see through my dress?"

Vanya tried not to snort as she finished up in the bathroom stall. When she came out, she automatically dipped her head so her hair—or rather the wig's hair—fell and hid the scars that started at her temple and continued down along the left side of her face.

The wig was a necessity. The scars made her stand out too much. In the past two years, she'd convinced herself not to care so much about them, but the reality was that they did make her stand out and she couldn't have that.

If she didn't do something to disguise her looks, it would be far too easy to track her down.

And she still suspected it wasn't enough.

Of course, tonight, it hardly mattered. These girls weren't paying her any attention at all.

They were too busy staring at their friend's dress.

"Oh, you can definitely see through it."

Yeah. Vanya was hard-pressed not to roll her eyes as the girl clapped a hand to her forehead and dramatically cried, "I look like such a slut…why didn't anybody tell me?"

"Well, we thought you knew…"

The dress's transparency wasn't going to add or detract from the girl's would-be sluttiness. Maybe the fact that it didn't quite cover her lacy boy shorts, her lack of a bra and her very real need for one—that might add to the slut image. Or the fact that she'd already had sex tonight—twice. Vanya had seen the girl going at it outside on her way in—and she'd also seen Ms. See-through Dress fucking a different guy in the bathroom here earlier.

Vanya noticed things.

Lots of things—particularly in places like this.

Places like this—rank, nasty dives that made her want to take a bath.

But she needed to be here.

Tonight.

Vanya didn't even know why.

She just knew she needed to be here.

Even though it was screwing with her head something awful. Too much going on—too much sex, too much anger, too much confusion and chaos and depression and sadness and want and lust and greed…

All the thoughts pressed in on her and she couldn't block them all out. It was as if she'd walked into the local Best Buy and somebody had jacked up all the speakers to maximum.

She hated it.

The noise, the chaos, they screwed with her shields something awful.

She did fine one-on-one, two-on-one, even ten- or twenty-on-one. But a few hundred angry, angsty young adults and not-so-young adults who were trying desperately to pretend they were…hell, it was enough to screw with any psychic's shields. At least, she'd prefer to think so.

To say her shields were compromised was putting it mildly.

This wasn't a place she wanted to be.

And if she listened to her instincts, she'd leave because there was danger in every corner here.

Death waited.

She could feel it, all but taste it.

She hadn't tasted it this strong since the night her sister Irina had died—been killed.

The night Vanya had killed her. Killed her and the demon inside her. At least she'd hoped the demon died. She didn't know enough about the demons to know for sure. After all, nobody would tell her. She suspected not many could. Those who could weren't talking.

A giggle pierced the dark shroud of Vanya's thoughts and she braced her hands on the cool porcelain of the sink, made herself think. Made herself focus. She needed to get out of here.

Back into the club.

Where they were.

The succubae and incubae.

The demons.

They were her main concern—the reason she was here.

She didn't need to be worrying about a bunch of giggling, silly girls. Girls who were busy lamenting over a silly, sheer dress and whether or not any of them made a hookup tonight.

Vanya wished that were the biggest concern of her life.

That hadn't ever been a concern in her life.

She rarely had time for it.

No—her biggest concern was currently centered around the demons who had selected this bar as a feeding ground. Even though they were stronger than her, faster than her…

Even though they could kill her with ridiculous ease.

Kill her—

But then again, that was her goal, wasn't it?

She couldn't really make any real progress until she died.

I've got a deal for you…

Like it was yesterday, Vanya could remember the night he'd come to her.

His name was Will. Or at least that was the name he'd given her.

He was one of the people who could enlighten her about demons. But he wasn't too interested in sharing many details with her. At least not yet. In good time—that was his favorite line.

One would think he'd be more interested in talking to her, reassuring her. Considering he was trying to convince her to join him. And in order to do that? She had to die. Yeah, that was a real kicker. Some reassurance would be appreciated. But he never gave it, and oddly enough, she trusted him despite that fact.

She'd met him five years ago.

Five years ago—she'd been eighteen and alone, fighting against those things, like she'd been doing as often as she could, ever since she was sixteen when her sister had been taken over by them. Her sister, her friend, her only family.

Then…

"I've got a deal for you."

He'd come out of nowhere. Dressed all in white, from the long, white leather coat, to the white leather shoes. On many men, it would have looked foolish. On him…it fit.

Vanya, covered in blood, still shuddering from the rush of adrenaline, had barely been able to keep the scream trapped behind her lips when the man practically appeared right in front of her.

Not that he had—that wasn't possible.

But it sure as hell seemed that way.

With a sneer to cover her fear, she started to go around him. "Sorry, pal. If you're looking to get laid, you're looking in the wrong place."

He caught her arm. "I'm not looking for sex, Vanya. I'm looking for fighters. And that's what you are. An hour of your time, in public, and I'll buy you a meal."

The exact right words—he couldn't have offered her diamonds with a better result.

Her belly growled. It had been more than a day since she'd scavenged up a decent meal.

Although she had the money she'd stolen from her latest kill, if this guy was willing to fork over the dough…hooking her thumbs in her pockets, she studied him.

"A meal and fifty bucks," she said, lifting her chin.

He smiled. "Not a problem. Shall we?" He gestured toward the road.

But Vanya hesitated. She'd just killed two…things. They'd been human once and their bodies still looked human. That meant they'd bled…a lot.

And the police would think she was insane if she told them some story about demons and possession…

Plus, although the dark clothes she wore hid the blood pretty well, in the light, people would notice something.

"I'll meet you. Someplace. Two hours. I've got a prior engagement," she said.

"Ahhh. Yes. It wouldn't be a bad idea to clean up, change your clothes, I imagine."

The blood drained from her face—she felt it. Swallowing, she stared at his face. And although she didn't like to do it, she lowered her shields, just a bit, prepared to jerk them back up in case he felt like…one of them.

What she felt was…

Weariness. Strength. And light—it was almost like she stood in the sunshine after years and years in darkness.

Hissing out a breath, she backed away, staring at him.

Judging by the look in his eyes, he'd known exactly what she was doing. He continued to watch her, waiting, a patient look on his face, as though he'd wait forever. As though he could wait forever.

Suddenly, she wasn't so hungry and she didn't think he was worth the fifty bucks or the free meal.

"Maybe not, but that deal I mentioned? It's worth it," he murmured. "You'll end up dead, one of these nights, when you go out there. You'll continue this quest, determined to kill those things before they take away somebody else's sister, mother, brother, son…but this time, you'll be the one to fall. The one to die. Or perhaps worse—you'll end up one of them. It's a risk and you know it. It's a fear you live with. The nightmare that keeps you awake, even though you sleep only during the day when the sun shines bright in the sky."

Terror squeezed her chest, her throat.

Shit.

Shit.

Shit—how in the hell—what the hell—

"Who in the fuck are you?" she demanded. "How do you know that?"

The smile curling his lips was sad. "Somebody not so different from you, sweeting." He reached inside his pocket.

She grabbed her knife, brandished it.

And then felt very much the fool when he held out a crisp fifty dollar bill. "Yours…whether you meet me or not—the good Lord knows you could use a good meal or two on you. Your favorite restaurant. Be there. In two hours. Or not. But I mean you no harm."

"What do you want?" she demanded.

"Meet me…or not. Like I said, I have a deal for you, Vanya. One that will make you faster, stronger…and you'll be able to kill all the monsters you wish.. And they'll never be able to take you over. That nightmare, the one that haunts you? You'll be free from it. Forever. I promise you."

He turned around and strode away. She stared at him, dimly thinking she hadn't told him her favorite restaurant.

Free…

She shook her head, trying to make herself listen to common sense, and not that desperate, desperate hope. He's just a quack, she told herself. One who hadn't even asked her what her favorite place was, so how could he meet her?

"I'll be there, Vanya. I promise. The question is…will you be?" he called out over his shoulder.

A quack—a freaking weird one.

One who…holy shit.

He'd fucking disappeared.

Right in front of her.

Yes. The site is going crazy.

Ignore us.

I'm fiddling.

Blog/site issues…

Okay, just so ya know.  Had my blog/website moved to a new hosting service over the past day or so.  If you're seeing flubs with things missing and then reappearing, it's from that.

A few things, I'm afraid–mostly a few comments that were made–have been lost, I think.  There were only five or six, but I don't have any way to retrieve them, I don't think.  They were made during the transfer process and insanity ensued. I'm sorry!

The good news…I was able to reactivate my old spam blocker, which was much more effective than the one I've been using.  That means, hopefully, the issue with some comments being caught & held in the mod queue won't happen quite as often-the exception is comments that contain two or more links.  Those are always caught in the mod queue and Nicole or I clear them once we make sure they aren't spam.

Keep in mind that sometimes there are just hangups.  I don't know why-I do know sometimes it's slower to load and it will take a while for a comment to show.  I'm not tech-savvy enough to know the reason behind it.

I think with the change back to Akismet for spam, it will smooth things out a lot though.

#Fridayreads giveaway…Hexed

Just a quick note-my website is being moved/was moved. You might notice a few blips and things may be slow to load for a short period of time. Thanks for understanding!

Today's Friday Read.

I've only read the first story so far, but it rocked.

Ilona Andrews' Magic Dreams from the Hexed anthology.

My 5th line/56th page…

Hiromi came in to buy groceries.

And hey-lookie what Ilona says on her site…

The events of Magic Dreams take place between Magic Bleeds (Book 4) and Magic Slays (Book 5)  This novella is completely separate from the main storyline.  You can read MAGIC SLAYS before Hexed or Hexed before MAGIC SLAYS without any fear of spoilers.

So if you haven't read her stuff, this is a perfectly awesome place to start!

Want to enter for a chance to win this book? Do the following…

Grab a book…any book.
Turn to page 56.
Find the fifth sentence.
Post that sentence (plus one or two others if you like) in the comments section of this blog to enter
A winner will be posted here within a week or so-please read the disclaimer-entering means you've READ the disclaimer.
Void where prohibited.
Odds of winning depend on number entries.
Comments must be made at my blog/website to be entered, not FB, not goodreads, etc.
Winner to be posted at my blog-must contact me or Nicole to claim prize.
Rest of my rules in the disclaimer-please read it.

 

FYI, I'm out of town (and already mostly on vacation) starting next week.  The winner will be drawn once/posted once I'm back, probably the week of July 11, and the winner will then have two weeks after that to contact me.

A word about comments on the blog

Just a general word about comments about the blog-as I'd mentioned back on May 2, I started having a massive issue with spambots and crap here on the blog.  I'd always used Akismet and it had worked wonderfully…up until then.

In about 36 hours, I  had like 200 something spam comments.  70 came in about 12 hours.  Nicole and I were going insane.  I tried changing the commenting deal on the blog.  That didn't fix it.  I tried restricting it so that comments were closed on posts more than a week old.  That didn't fix it.

In the end, I had to switch to a different spam plugin here.  The one I had been using didn't appear to be compatible with the current version of WordPress and whatever software/technical stuff I can't comprehend.

The spam software works okay, but it's most effective when I keep it set to a specific set of parameters…namely that the first comment left by new visitors are kept in moderation until I clear them through.

The moderation queue just holds comments until they can be vetted as being from real people and not:

Hi, I comes to ur blog from the goggle search engines and wow, nice content!  it shuld relly be ranked much higher…perhaps if  you didnt talk abt such silly stuffs, you can have higher seo rankings! cheers!

And then links to whatever spam site.  And there's always the fun… check out sexy singlez!  fun butsects.

It doesn't seem like such a big thing but when you're having to clear out the spam from the blog, and worrying that if one of your visitors clicked on it and it loaded their PC with a bunch of nasty malware…especially when it's in the dozens, or higher, daily.  And it is a big thing for me.  So I ramped up the spam control.

Most comments are cleared within a couple hours, some within a few minutes, because Nicole is fast.  Generally, after somebody has commented and the comment was approved, they can post without any trouble.

Unfortunately, some still get held up and I can't seem to tinker with the spam settings enough to change that.  AOL email addies get caught a lot.  Posting multiple links will always get your email caught and held for moderation.

Now while I appreciate it, in anticipation of possible offers of suggestions and help, I'm tech-stupid when it comes to issues of CSS and wordpress.  I can only get the plugins done when I have my web person helping me and I'm very picky about who helps me.  So until she's able to do it…I'm not touching/altering anything.  I appreciate the offers, but I almost broke the website last time I touched anything and I'm not doing that again.  I'm pretty sure my weblady appreciates that, too.

I hope people can understand, but for the time being, comments from new people will always be held by the spam filter in the mod queue.  And the mod queue is persnickety.  Sometimes it catches other email addies.  Usually AOL email addies, although that may be based more on the IP (and I think those are hub IPs).  Hub IPs, if I recall correctly, are something AOL does-they group them together.  That's an AOL thing, again, something I have no control over.

Any caught comments are usually cleared through within a couple of hours.  Sometimes it can take up to a day if it's on the weekend.  I don't keep up with email as much on weekends.  That's family time and as much as I love my readers, my family comes first and when they are home, first and foremost, I devote my time to them.

As much as I love her and wish I can make her do only my bidding, Nicole is entitled to a life-she doesn't keep up with email as much on weekends either and that's how we get the notification of an comment in the mod queue…via email.

But comments rarely stay in the mod queue more than a couple of hours even on weekends.  And unless it's one of those crazy persnickety things that the spam filter is being weird about, after the first post, most visitors can comment freely after that first post.

I know this is an inconvenience for some people, and I'm sorry.  But I'd rather do it this way than risk somebody inadvertently clicking on a bad link on my blog and ending up on a malware site.  If you've ever had your PC infected with malware, you can probably understand my concern.  I'm also pretty sure none of you come here to read multiple comments for SEO rankings, sexy singlez sites and just where, oh where, can you find that little blue pill…

Writer Wednesdays… Lynn Viehl

So I already explained where the idea for Writer Wednesdays came from.  The first guest is one of my absolute, unchanging fave authors… Lynn Viehl. (I say unchanging, because I have a list of faves that changes, and one that never changes…Lynn Viehl, like Nora Roberts, never, ever leaves the list.)

The questions for WW are going to stay the same. At least that's the plan.

Three questions are mostly writer-focused, but one applies to readers and writers.

Here we go…

What's the one thing that remains unchanged during your writing process, from one book to another? (ie: Intensive plotting? Music?)

A:   My daily edits never change.  I always edit whatever new material I write on the same day, and then I don't look at it again until I'm finished the entire book. This helps me avoid problems like over-writing the story, getting caught in backtracking/rewriting loops, or carrying the partial manuscript out in the back yard to set it on fire and roast marshmallows over it.

What's the one piece of advice you'd give a new writer?

A:   When other writers try to give you advice, just tell them to piss off.  Kidding.  The only new writer advice that ever worked for me was something author Susan Elizabeth Phillips told me when I was a rookie:  Whatever you do, protect the work.

What's the one piece of advice you wish was wiped from the minds of writers everywhere?

A:   If I'm getting only one chance to use a magic brain eraser on every writer, I'd scrub out that idiot "Write what you know."  It's complete nonsense.  Write what you don't know.  Write what you dream.  Write whatever you damn well feel like writing.

What's the one book you think everybody, writer or not, should read?

A: For everybody, it would have to be One Day in the Life of Ivan Denisovich by Aleksandr Solzhenitsyn.

 

Share your heart…LA Banks Auction

From the website…

It is with profound sadness that we have to inform you that our beloved sister and friend, Leslie Esdaile, ("L.A. Banks") is most gravely ill. She is facing an uphill battle in her struggle with serious illness.

 

Various people in the publishing community have banded together to help do what they can to help out.  You can read more about it here, or go straight to the auctions.

http://stores.ebay.com/shareyourheartforlabanksmed

I've donated a signed set of the VEIL books.

Writer Wednesdays #WW

So on Twitter, you'll see a hasthag thing on Wednesdays… a #WW one.  The hashtags are just used to mark identify certain topics and stuff…like #Fridayreads, or #WW  (Writer Wednesdays.)  You can use them if you know what how to follow the topics…on Wednesdays, you'll see the #WW pop up and listings for writer peoples on Twitter.

Which is where I came up for the idea for different sort of Writer Wednesday.  Where I grill writers.  On my blog.

And the first post will be going up tomorrow, around 9 am, EST.

Some people probably already know who my first vict… guest is.  That is, assuming they know how my brain works and the writer I immediately think of when it comes all to things writerly craft and wisdom.  She's also…ah…nice enough to not block my emails, which means… score…

Blog reboot

Just a heads-up, comments are off for this…I'm not looking for strokes or pats or anything, just stating a few things.

I'm tired.  I realize after multiple surgeries in a very short period of time and the workload I keep, it's probably to be expected.  But I hate being this tired.

I'm stressed.  I'm often cranky.  I've got too much to do and not of enough of me to do it.  I think I'm past the worst of it with edits and stuff for a while, but now I have to catch up.  I have to finish a GRIMM short story, I have to finish two books by fall-one by September 1, one by November 1 and I need to start putting together pitches for the next project.

And that's just the writer part of being a writer-it doesn't touch the promo that goes along with it, or the blogging stuff.  We won't discuss the non-job related stuff.  Again…I'm tired.

I've been blogging almost daily for the past few years and I think something I need to do is cut back. I don't write a blog daily, I tend to batch write three or four posts at a time, sometimes more, but it's still another thing on an endless list of things I keep up with.

I do want to keep to a fairly regular schedule, but I think what I'm going to focus on doing is having a blog go up on Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays.  I've got a thing I'm going to start doing on Wednesdays that's super easy and I'll probably continue to do the Friday reads.  Mondays will be random stuff.  When I have news, I'll definitely make sure it gets posted.

But instead of focusing brain power on what to blog about, I'm going to streamline for a while and focus on catching up and resting some more.  If you don't see blogs up as often, it's just because I need the break.

I'm leaving on vacation next Monday and I'm not sure if I'll be blogging while I'm gone or not…if not, I'll probably settle into my new regular schedule when I get back the second week in July.

For the dads…

Happy Father's Day… (No, this isn't us-it's from Dreamstime)