Amy L. Sullivan's Blog, page 8

Strong Girls Can: A Summer Series

You Are Invited

To: Strong Girls Can, a summer series focused on raising strong girls.

When: Every Monday starting next Monday, June 1st. 

Where: Right here on this blog. Whew, you found it. No GPS required. Expect conversation to continue on your favorite social media outlets including Facebook, Instagram, and Twitter.

Participants should: Show up (fancy attire not required).

Specific topics include: Summer challenges for our girls, book and movie reviews, an essay contest for your girl, interviews, photo sharing, and heaps of other goodness.

: :

See you next Monday, friends!

Photo credit.

Art Inspires Art

Recently, I met a friend for lunch. After lunch, we stumbled upon an adorable art gallery. The gallery had just opened. The artists were young and dripping with hope. They proudly walked my friend and I around their pottery studio, and I bought a berry bowl.

It’s not that I eat a lot of berries or I need a bowl for my berries, but I bought a berry bowl because the energy of artists with passion is contagious. Creatives who rage against laughable odds make me giggly.

It’s why I’ve made a point to notice artists, artists who create colorful tumblers.

Or glass creations in a kiln (Crucible Glassworks).

Or music in front of a giant iron with a trumpet. Just look at this group I discovered jamming out on the corner.

There they were with a handful of CDs and stickers just doing their thing. Singing it out. Creating. Wait, you two need to meet. Readers, meet Midnight Snack. I give you permission to turn them up and dance around.

Now that you are dancing, tell me about you. Tell me what you are creating. Tell me where you are finding art and inspiration.

Sunday: Q and A

Question and answer posts thrill me. Let’s catch up, shall we?

Reading: If You Find this Letter: My Journey to Find Purpose Through Hundreds of Love Letters to Strangers by Hannah Brencher. Long ago, a friend and I interviewed Hannah for our IMPACT ezine. Check out page five. Now, Hannah is sharing her story of loving people through love letters. Beautiful write.

Playing: Trivia Crack. Online games and apps are so not me, but then I discovered Trivia Crack. The questions are easy, and I earn lots of points.

Watching: Outlander. Is it science fiction? Is it historical fiction? Is it romance? Who knows, but Outlander keeps me up entirely too late.

Trying: I am trying to write a personal essay for a contest. Apparently, part of the reason I talk about others so much is because I don’t like to talk about myself. ‘Tis killing me.

Cooking: The Pioneer Woman’s oven-roasted cauliflower. Remember how much you used to hate that white mushy vegetable? You will reconsider cauliflower after you cook this.

Drinking: Jamba Juice’s Mango-a-go-go fruit smoothie. Now sold in your local grocery store’s freezer section. Oh, yeah.

Calling: Susan and leaving long and rambling messages.

Texting: The husband.

Pinning: Children’s book illustrations. More specifically, anything from Abigail Halpin.

Tweeting: Actually retweeting anything from @CoolMomTech. My technological IQ has jumped 20 points since following them.

Doing: TV interviews with no make-up and no shower. Oh, and uncombed hair. For more foolishness like this, be sure to follow me on Instagram.

Going: Our family has attended more funerals in the last seven months than we have in my entire life. Death is difficult. Unexpected death is almost unbearable. Will you pray for us?

Loving: “I Want You Back” by Yuna.

Hating: Ants. It’s spring in the South, friends. Watch yourself.

Discovering: So my oldest won an Xbox from her orthodontist. My husband and I tell our kids they have had too much screen time, send them to bed, and then game it up.

Hoping: To create playlists for my blog. I realize playlists are very 2010. Consider my reintroduction a cutting edge idea for 2015.

Smelling: Mrs. Myers Basil Hand Soap. I wish I could create a scratch and sniff spot for you on your screen so you could experience this soap.

Thanking: Thanking God I work part-time this year. Sure, sure, it’s an every day type of part-time, but I am thankful just the same.

Considering: Mixing-up various patterns of orange to wear this spring. The thought is almost too bold for this girl who allows gray and black dominate her wardrobe.

Your turn. Choose a category and tell me what’s happening your world!

New spiral notebooks, freshly painted rooms, and new life

I know a single mom who is a recovering addict.

Every day she rides a bus an hour and twenty-five minutes to a job she doesn’t like. After a long day working at a position she feels unqualified to perform, this mom returns to a house, which is not her own and her children’s homework, which has been left undone.

I want to tell this mom I am sorry about her crappy job. I want to say I feel bad that she ate a mini-bag of Doritos for lunch. I’d like to tell her the new math they teach in schools doesn’t make sense to me either.

But I don’t say any of it. With fierce authority, this mom tells me she has lived a life I can’t imagine. As she speaks, I look down and study a torn corner of a Snickers wrapper sitting by my foot.

Instead of complaining, this woman talks about new life. Her plans, her dreams, her hopes, and I listen and wonder where this woman’s faith comes from and why instead of being brittle, it flourishes.

New Life and New Hope

This is the time of the year when God whispers new life into everything. It’s when we see nature’s symphony of color began to erupt and when I am reminded of how much humans crave hope.

Hope. It is the reason I love a good, $.99 spiral notebook, freshly painted rooms, a thick, quiet snow, and planting seeds in Dixie cups. Hope is the reason New Year’s Eve makes me weepy, and I never pass on an opportunity to hold a newborn baby.

Hope is why I hold my breath as Jesus’ body is wrapped in linen and why I read the entire story of the crucifixion and not cry until I hear the tomb is empty. As the women arrive at Jesus’ tomb with spices and find the large stone at the entrance rolled away, my hope is confirmed.

He rose.

He didn’t forget about us, his whiny, stubborn, unbelieving creations. He didn’t think our sins were too heavy. He decided we are worth it.

Jesus showed up.

: :

Happy Easter, friends. Praying for you this weekend. Praying you have abundant reminders of new life, hope, and the promise of the resurrection.

This post is written as a part of the Share Your Story series on the theme of resurrection at The High Calling.

Are you on Instagram? Let’s connect.

Photo credits: Sunrise, hands.

Happy Half Birthday: Book Update, Month Six

Holy moly, friends, it’s been six months since the release of When More is Not Enough. I did not remember this little fact on my own (says the girl who checks her husband’s license every year to confirm his birthday). Recently, a reader emailed me with questions, questions, questions about the book and book happenings and Transformation Village. Here’s a happy half birthday update.

Transformation Village~Questions and Answers

I know you are donating the proceeds of your book to Transformation Village, but will you remind me what Transformation Village is again? Transformation Village is a housing development for single women, mothers with children, single fathers with children, and families in crisis in Western North Carolina.

Will you always give the proceeds of your book to Transformation Village? Yes, the proceeds I make from When More is Not Enough will always be given to Transformation Village. Forever and ever, amen. When my publisher cuts me a check, our family sends the money we receive to Asheville Buncombe Community Christian Ministry (the nonprofit who is working to build Transformation Village).

How often do you send checks to Transformation Village? We send checks quarterly. So far we have sent two.

Are you donating big money to Transformation Village? Nope. I don’t get all of the money from the books sold. I share the money with my publisher and agent. If the book sells for $10.00, I would only get $3.50. Hello, traditional publishing! This is why authors don’t like to talk numbers.

Where is Transformation Village in the buying/building process? An awesome and affordable plot of land has been found! It’s on a bus route, close to jobs, and close to schools. As the process moves forward, I will be sure to share.

: : : : :

And now for what I have learned during the last six months (in list form because that’s how I think).

Writing a book is a vulnerable adventure. Think of it as wearing a two-piece bathing suit to work every day. You are wearing the bathing suit in the winter when you aren’t tan, and you are prancing around without a cover-up. Oh, and on this specific day of work, everyone you have ever known including childhood friends, high school classmates, college aquaintances, and relatives show-up. And that’s how it feels to publish a book.
Just because you are doing something for others, doesn’t mean it will be easy or go the way you envisioned.
People deeply desire to love others better.
Facetiming with book clubs is f-u-n.
Promoting your current book and working on other projects is tough.
Live interviews are um, live.
Kids get generosity.
Strangers will surprise you with encouragement and support.
Loved ones will carry your book around and give it to unsuspecting people in airports.
Team-teaching ladies who love God in Texas is life-changing.
Even at times when community makes me cringe, I must have community.
Elementary school visits are good for the ego. Children make you feel like a hero for just showing up.
God uses your flaws for His glory.
Don’t worry about what’s next. Focus on the what’s now.

Thanks for all of your encouragement and support, friends. This would be zero fun without you.

Cell Phone Picture Dump

Our weather has been manic.

One day I am strolling around in the sunshine coveting an outdoor metal sofa.

The next, I am sitting in what appears to be a snow globe.

Recently, on a pariticularly snowy day, we went on a drive. Do you know people don’t go on drives anymore? Just ask our kids. They had no understanding that when you go on a drive there really isn’t a destination. You just wander. You drive.

While on this drive, I remembered rumors I heard about a woman who lives in a nearby mountain town. According to the whispers, this woman sells pot pies out of an unmarked store. Her store is open from when she has pies, until when she does not. I am not sure if it was the snow or the driving, but I went mad crazy fixating on those pot pies.

Upon arriving at the town, I forced my family out of the car, and we searched the main street for the secret pot pie shop, but alas, we found nothing. Well, I shouldn’t say we found nothing, because we found this.

It is a telephone chair. Really. Back in the day, people sat down, and the telephone rested on the little desk. Of course, I am in love with this piece of furniture.

We also found these.

A kind of record version of a jukebox. You pick the album you want to hear, and these people play it. You can sit in a telephone desk and listen to the record of your choice.

Back to the pot pies. Once we were home, I sat down at the computer vowing not to move until I found out where this secret pot pie shop was located. Turns out, it’s a shop with regular hours and a regular sign and you can even call them and order your scrumptious pie. The shop is called Pot Pie.

Curse you, rumors.

In other news, this occurred.

Forty happened. Hoenstly, I simply cannot remember a better birthday. For the last week, I felt full from the constant stream of love which has been tossed my way. My husband says forty has turned me into a birthday diva. Don’t say anything, but he may be right.

Whenever this blog gets quiet, it usually means I am working on my offline writing, and that’s exactly what’s been happening. When I first started writing, I used to boss thoughts out of my head, but I’ve learned I need quiet and space to coax the good ideas out. So, I’ve been busy ignoring noise and working hard not to create more noise of my own.

If you create, you know exactly what I mean. In fact, I wrote about this very thing over at Deeper Waters last week. My post is called Creativity and Soggy Celery. I gaurantee it is the only online article with the words soggy celery in the title. You will have to jump over and let me know if you can relate.

Before this editon of cell phone picture dump is complete, there are two more pictures you must see.

This is one.

Don’t ask. This confuses me, and I was there.

You take one very pregnant friend and put her on a swing which hangs across an icy mountain river and then you push her and then you send her husband to scale across the river on a skinny beam. Not pictured is me in Christmas pajamas at eleven o’clock in the morning, and no, it wasn’t even close to Christmas. There is no explanation for this nonsense, but this is why these are my people.

And for the last photo…

It’s a trapeze which was discovered sitting on an empty lot. No, the circus wasn’t in town. Yes, I wanted to climb the ladder and give it a go. I mean a real honest-to-goodness trapeze just set-up in a neighborhood.

Your turn. What kind of adventures have you been up to and do they involve Christmas pajamas, a telephone desk, or a trapeze?

Does Online Activism Translate to Offline Action?

Ask around and people will tell you social media used for social good has the ability to make a positive impact on the world. We can easily like, retweet, share, repost, and even change our online profile picture to help spread the word about issues we feel need attention.

Regardless of the people group or cause which keeps me awake at night, regardless of where I live, regardless of the time I have to contribute, regardless of my education, I have the ability to get involved. I have the power and ability to click.

It is estimated that 98% of nonprofits have a Facebook page, and with approximately 500 million tweets sent out a day, there are legions of people waiting to read the next 140-word nugget of truth. Nonprofits are embracing Pinterest, and since Instagram is officially the fastest gowing social media platform, more organizations are using it to share. Plus, one can’t ignore the contests and awards set-up to determine the best social media for social good campaigns of the year.

But does online activism transfer to offline action? Are we taking digital activism beyond the screen? One recent study found the majority of people who “like” a page on Facebook rarely follow-up their like with a donation or further engagement.

Look, if you make a Facebook page we will “like” it—it’s the least we can do. But it’s also the most we can do. ~Seth Meyers, Weekend Update, Saturday Night Live, September 22, 2012

Another study suggests the increased online presence of nonprofits has done little more than create a generation of “slacktivists” who will engage in token displays of support for a cause but aren’t likely to engage in meaningful contributions and real-life activities for the cause.

Take for example Invisible Children’s Kony Campaign (you remember the war criminal, Joseph Kony). In 2012, the Make Kony Famous Campaign video had more views than any other YouTube video. Bracelets were sold. Posters were put up. Kony action kits were available. However, despite having over 3.5 million people pledge to act locally in protest of Kony, only a tiny number of supporters actually showed up to the in-person events.

And all of this worries me. I am that worried despite an endless amount of online opportunities to learn about others, that we missing out on loving others. I’m worried that when we donate a photo or create a rainbow loom bracelet for another, we feel good, but we miss out on the human aspect of serving others.

I’m worried that even though we may understand human trafficking more, we understand holding hands less. I’m worried that while raising awareness about a cause is important, awareness should be the starting line and not the end of the race.

Anyway, this was bothering me. All of it. Activism, slacktivism, loving people in the digital world, the whole doggone thing.

And so I reached out and asked others what they thought. Meet this month’s experts, click on their names, check out their online homes, find out what causes are important to them.

Ask the Expert

Here’s the question: Hundreds of social media campaigns related to social justice issues happen daily. In your opinion, are these campaigns an effective way to get people engaged with a cause or just cool content to like or retweet? Have you ever participated (beyond the screen) in a campaign, movement, or event you first learned about via social media?

Kristin Demery

On one hand, it bothers me that folks feel they’ve actually accomplished something through armchair activism, clicking a button but never going further. However, there have been numerous times that campaigns or articles have caught my attention in such a way that I’ve later returned — things like putting together backpacks for foster care kids through The Forgotten Initiative and joining the Bucket Brigade to fulfill requests from terminally-ill adults, for instance. Despite my reservations, I think social media can be a catalyst for awareness and, eventually, change.

Lisa Van Engen

I follow Nicholas Kristof and Sheryl WuDunn, a husband/wife journalist team, on social media.  Through their work I was able to be involved in the launches of two documentary films, Girl Rising and A Path Appears, based on their books. About Proximity hosted Girl Rising in a Holland Theater, welcoming two hundred guests. Through social media, I have been able to introduce many people to the work of organizations around the world supporting women and girls.

Dawn Boyer

Campaigns provide an opportunity for people to connect heart desire and intentional blessing in an opportune way even in this quickly scanning social society. If the goal is to get the message out, then the effectiveness of the campaign is successful and any extra involvement is a bonus and sometimes that is all we need to push us to jump in with both feet.

Raewyn Smith

I’m undecided on the effectiveness because some campaigns raised a ton of awareness and others are more of a fad. Alicia Keys’ Buy Life campaign was done very well, and raised money, while the ALS Ice Bucket Challenge seemed more like a fad, with less awareness – though I don’t believe that was the fault of the creators, just the way virality occasionally works.

Stasia Skelton

 Not long ago, I read some blog posts that basically said all of this social media buzz just isn’t effective, that people are not actually doing anything. Even though they are in part right, these posts made me a little sad. Before there is a major change there must be awareness. For example, a few years ago almost no one talked about human trafficking, but now it is at the forefront of many people’s minds and hearts, and where people’s hearts are their time and checkbook follow. It may take time, and I have no specific research to back it up, but I guarantee there are more efforts and funds going to rescue people from human trafficking than there were ten years ago. It all started with awareness. So is everyone that retweets and posts and hashtags going to give their time and resources? No, but ultimately progress is being made.

: : :

Your turn. I’d love to hear about online campaigns you have participated in. I want to know what you think about slacktivism. I’d like to hear about the nonprofits you engage with online.

Glorious Actions Aren’t Usually Glorious

People are attracted to glorious. Glorious views. Glorious missions. Glorious messages. Glorious ideas.

No one likes boring. We certainly don’t want good. We aren’t even crazy about great.

We want frontrow seats.

We crave oceanfront views.

I’ve been given the opportunity to help with childcare at a local facility for women and children. But often there are too many kids and too few toys and not enough room and if you decide to speak to me, please speak loudly because I can’t hear you over the noise that sounds like a fire engine crashing into a parade.

“It is the longest hour and a half of my life,” I complain to my husband.

To me, there is nothing exciting about childcare.

Babysitting = Zero glory.

Wait, wait. Scratch that. Babysitting = Negative glory.

I know I should love watching these children (believe me I feel guilty about it, I do), but after a long day, I don’t want to babysit. There, it’s out. I said it outloud.

Instead, maybe I could help this organization with a social media campaign or plan a fundraiser. Now, that’s big. Now, that’s important. Now, that is glorious.

But this organization doesn’t need a fundraiser organized, and they don’t care about social media. What they need is a babysitter and one who actually shows up.

Sometimes I get all mixed up and think God cares about the size our actions. I think God doesn’t want me to waste time on any old task. I think God measures actions, and let me tell you, babysitting barely ranks.

This way of thinking is flat out not true.

Of course God wants me to do glorious things in His name, but the majority of the time, those glorious things look like me showing up and then picking up that toy the kid with the runny nose dropped on the floor.

It’s not cool or shiny or new, but it certainly is glorious.

: : :

Psssst: I updated a prayer calendar for you.

Click on the link for easy printing! GrowingGivingHeartsPrayerCalendar

To the People Who Make Good Art

A few months ago, I was given the book Make Good Art. This book contains the full speech Neil Gaiman gave at Philadelphia’s University of the Arts in 2012. Make Good Art is full of advice and encouragement to those who create. I’ve read it and reread it, and I’ve listened to Neil speaking the words no less than ten times.

See, in the publishing world, the statistics writers face can be dismal.

At a conference back in October, I learned the following:

Authors can expect to sell less than 250 copies of their nonfiction book in one year.

On average, less than 3,000 copies of a nonfiction book will be sold in a book’s lifetime.

Anywhere from 100-1,000 books are competing for the same shelf space in a bookstore.

It also may surprise the average reader to hear that even if an author has an agent, a publisher, and a tribe of supporters who cheer long and hard, it takes an immense amount of work to sell books.

Today I honor writers I know.

Those who make art. Those who make themselves vulnerable. Those who shrug off statistics and decide to create anyway. Those who refuse to let the fear of failure trump the story or idea burning in their hearts.

Take a peek at what some of my writerly friends are up to.

1. Agnes Hopper Shakes Up Sweetbriar by Carol Heilman. Summer’s steamy haze coats North Carolina’s Blue Ridge Mountains, but feisty Agnes Marie Hopper discovers the heat isn’t the only thing causing her blood to boil. After a kitchen fire destroys her home, Agnes moves in with her daughter, Betty Jo. Three months later they come to an understanding: neither can tolerate living with the other. So on a sultry August morning, Betty Jo drives Agnes and her few belongings to Sweetbrier Manor, a local retirement home and former house of ill repute.

2. The Ruth Experience by The lovelies of The Ruth Experience (Kendra Roehl, Julie Fisk, and Kristin Demery). Have you wondered if your life has a story worth telling? Can you relate to the stories of women in the Bible, or do you seem to have little in common? The Ruth Experience takes a closer look at the story of Ruth and Naomi and key truths we can apply to our own lives today.

3. A Cup of Dust by Susie Finkbeiner. Releasing October 27, 2015!

4. Messiah to the Messed Up by Sue Ciullo. Messiah to the Messed Up interlaces rich Scripture narratives with twenty-first century stories. These threads, woven together, create an unforgettable tapestry of the life of Jesus, an image so real that you will feel His presence.

5. Casting the First Stone by Lisa Lawmaster Hess.  Casting the First Stone puts a unique twist on a familiar scenario, showing how God intervenes in human lives in unexpected ways.

6. What’s Under Your Cape? by Barbara Gruener. What if students in your classroom could excel in academics AND character education? What kind of impact would they make on the world? Through stories and activities, learn how Barbara Gruener uses the word superhereos to define positive character traits. This powerful handbook will change the way you look at character education.

Do you know someone who works hard to create (books, photos, paintings, music)? Leave a link to their art in the comments. Let’s celebrate.

Human Trafficking: How Mothers and Daughters Can Discuss (and fight!) it Together

Did you know January is Human Trafficking Awareness Month? Indeedy, ’tis true. In order to raise awareness and help us better understand how-to approach the topic of human trafficking with our daughters, I’ve invited, author, speaker, and human trafficking expert, Kimberly Rae to share with us today.

Here’s Kimberly.

: : :

Does your daughter know how to recognize a predator? Would she know how to help a friend at risk?

The average age for a girl in the US to be trafficked is 12-14. I had planned to talk with my daughter about trafficking when she was 16, maybe 15. Not 11. But now that I know predators look for easy targets, and young ones, I want to make sure my daughter, and yours, are aware and safe.

We can have good conversations, and even fight human trafficking together with our daughters, without having to fear over-educating them in the dark horror of the sex trade.

Here’s how:

Introduce the topic in a non-personal way. If you start talking about the dangers of sharing too much information on Facebook, your daughter might think you’re attacking her friendships or implying she’s doing something wrong. Better to read a book or watch a movie together on the topic, then discuss human exploitation from that springboard, leading to how it affects their lives personally. Age-appropriate resources are hard but not impossible to find. Here are a few:

Movies:

* Ages 2-10: Veggie Tales’ Tomato Sawyer & Huckleberry Larry’s Big River Rescue

*Ages 10-13: Disney’s The Rescuers

*Ages 13 and up: Videos at Women at Risk International (choose with discretion)

Books:

*Ages 2-10: The story of Joseph in the Bible. He was sold by his brothers, taken across the border and sold as a slave.

*Ages 10-13: Capturing Jasmina–yes, this is my book, but one of the reasons it was written is because I could not find a book on this topic safe to give to a pre-teen. The book presents trafficking and missions from the perspective of a 10-year-old girl who escapes from slavery in a garment factory.

*Ages 13 and up: Stolen Woman–this book also presents human trafficking and missions, through the story of a college-age girl who plans to work with orphans in India and accidentally meets a trafficked girl she’s determined to rescue.

2. Fight trafficking as a team! You can host a jewelry party through www.warinternational.org or www.rahabsrope.com. Or you can shop these sites together for special gifts that also raise awareness. You could also work on the topic of modern day slavery as a school project, studying and raising awareness together.

Other important ways you can help protect your daughter from exploitation:

1. Affirm your teen’s worth and value, so she doesn’t need to look for it in dangerous places.

2. Be real about the dangers out there, especially on the internet. Predators can pose as young girls, or even be young girls working for traffickers. Make sure your teen knows to never, ever, go alone or just with another teenager to meet an online friend.

3. Be present. Friend her on Facebook and let her know it. Be part of her life, ask about her friends, be involved enough that if she brings up a concern about so-in-so, you know who she’s talking about.

4. Care more about her than what she think of you. If it comes down to it, don’t keep from warning her about a dangerous behavior or friendship just because you don’t want her mad at you.

5. Give her resources. Get her your phone number and tell her she can call you anytime if she is in a situation she needs out of. Also teach her the human trafficking hotline number (1-888-373-7888, or the easier to memorize way, 888-3737-888) if she sees a questionable situation where someone is being victimized, or even if she just has questions.

6. As awkward as it might be at first, let her know she can ask you questions about sex, body parts, or things she hears or experiences. A lot of kids get hooked on pornography by googling things they are embarrassed to ask an adult, like, “What is sex?”

7. Help her develop safe boundaries beforehand. What is appropriate touch and when does it cross the line to inappropriate? What photos are okay to post on Facebook and what kind attract predators? Abuse happens sometimes because the victim isn’t sure if what is happening is allowable or not, especially if it is coming from someone in a trusted position.

8. Lastly, reassure her that, whatever happens, you are there to love her and listen to her, and you don’t want her ever to keep secrets because she is embarrassed or ashamed.

: : :

Kimberly Rae lived in Bangladesh, Uganda, Kosovo and Indonesia. Her Christian suspense/romance novels on international human trafficking (Stolen Woman, Stolen Child and Stolen Future) are all Amazon bestsellers. Rae now lives at the base of the Blue Ridge Mountains in North Carolina, where she writes and trains on human trafficking. Rae is married and has two young children. Find out more or order autographed books at www.kimberlyrae.com.

: :

Have you approached the topic of human trafficking with your daughter? Are there any tools or resources you have found valuable? Do share.