Amy L. Sullivan's Blog, page 7

#StrongGirlsCan Photo Update

Happy Monday, friends. Welcome to #StrongGirlsCan, our summer series for moms and daughters.

There’s nothing wrong with being a princess, we just think girls should be able to build their own castles too. ~Debbie Sterling, Founder of GoldieBlox

How goes progress on your Strong Girls Can – 88 Acts of Independence and Adventure?

Have you grabbed a girl in your life and started crossing-off activities? Here are a few Sullivan favorites.

#22 Paddleboard. Check! We even saw three stingrays from the board.

#37 Learn two jumprope songs. Check! Okay, almost check. We’ve learned one. I totally forgot about this recess hit from long ago.

#51 Pitch a tent. Check! When you want camp but also want easy access to Cheez-Its and a shower, head to the back deck for camping.

#68 Play a musical instrument. Check! Keep practicing even when your little sister says your violin sounds like a trumpet.

#72 Hang a swing from a tree. Check! Reassure questioning neighbors the knot is secure.

#85 Hike a mountain. Check! Let the kids make their own fire pit and make an additional fire pit for the worm they found along the way.

Your turn. Tell me about the adventure happening in your world on these long summer days. Have you and your girl tried any acts off our list? If not, it’s not too late to join! 

Clickable PDF —-> Strong Girls Can ~ 88 Acts of Independence and Adventure

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Did you you catch the post on girls in STEM (science, technology, engineering, and math)? Three seventh grade girls create prosthetic hand for those in need.

Strong Girls Can: Use STEM to Make a Difference

Carson Ellis, Corbyn Player, and McKenzie Smith may look like your average rising seventh grade girls, but look closer.

Photo courtesy of Lexington-Richland School District Five

These three girls are holding prosthetic hands, hands they used a 3-D printer to create, hands they plan to give away, hands which have sparked the girls’ interest in STEM (science, technology, engineering, and math).

Belk Service Learning Challenge and Team Prosthetic Kids

Under the guidance of their teacher, Dr. Christopher Craft, these three students from Lexington-Richland School District Five’s CrossRoads Middle School in South Carolina, entered and won the 2015 Belk Service Learning Challenge.

The Belk Service Learning Challenge encourages middle school students to work in teams with the help of a teacher to identify issues in local communities and design an action plan to create a solution.

For their project, Ellis, Player, and Smith, also known as team Prosthetic Kids, used 3-D printers to create prosthetic hands. Seeing a need for prosthetic hands, team Prosthetic Kids discovered an organization, Enabling The Future, which connects those who have access to 3-D printers to those in need of prosthetic hands. Using a 3-D printer the school acquired through a grant, Dr. Craft and his students printed a prosthetic hand for a middle school girl in the Charleston area last fall. Since then, Dr. Craft and the three girls have printed more prosthetic hands and even held a school-wide “Hand-A-Thon.”

Grand prize of the Belk Service Learning Challenge included $2,000 in prize money and an additional $5,000 to cover the purchase of additional 3-D printers.

Photo courtesy of Lexington-Richland School Distric Five

Creating a prosthetic hand, must be extremely difficult, right? Not according to student, Corbyn Player.

“First, you have to make the 3-D design on the computer. Next, you send it to the printer, which will heat up the filament and will start printing the hand pieces.”

But these girls must have been involved in STEM related classes for years, right?

“I actually had no experience before Dr. Craft’s STEM class, but once I got to know STEM, I knew that this is what I wanted to do,” shared Ellis.

Surely this experience and contest were something nice to do for others and an engaging class project, but now the girls can get back to activities which really interest them, right?

Not a chance.

Player is contemplating being an engineer or STEM teacher. Smith wants to study biology and make prosthetics for animals, and Ellis hopes to find a way to mix marine biology and STEM.

Technology for Good

The story of team Prosthetic Kids shoots a giant hole in the theory that kids today are a self-absorbed bunch who are only interested in Snapchat, selfies, and the ellaborate additions being made to their Mindcraft designs.

“In my daily work with students, I am constantly reminded of the immense power of technology to do good,” states Dr. Christopher Craft.

Dr. Craft goes on to say, “If we are striving to raise children focused on others, technology can serve as a powerful catalyst to improve our world. My students are a daily example of the possibilities. As a father, I am working to help my daughters see that they have the potential to help solve the very real problems they see in daily life. It is an exciting time to be alive, and our children’s power to change the world is unprecedented.”

Help girls grow in STEM

As parents, we know STEM is important, but what are practical ways we can grow that interest?

Dr. Craft encourages parents to learn a basic understanding of STEM, and then further support interest by searching out ways for students to get involved in STEM, both through the local school and in the community.

Resources Dr. Craft recommends are as follows:

Maker Faire. These maker festivals show-off human creativity and ingenuity.
Super Awesome Sylvia. This young lady produces a web show focusing on maker projects that anyone can do.
Adafruit. Started by a female engineer, this is where Dr. Craft buys his parts. They also have an amazing learning site with loads of tutorials on topics such as wearable technology, Raspberry Pi, Arduino, and much more.

Advice to other girls

My daughter’s middle school offers both an introduction to STEM class and a robotics class, but instead of enrolling in either, my girl signed-up for the career technical classes. I badgered her to change her schedule. She refused. I badgered more. She rolled her eyes.

Then something changed. My daughter learned about Prosthetic Kids. My girl saw other tweens who wore braids, braces, polka dot skirts, AND who were delving headfirst into STEM.

What’s better than endless prompting from parents? Real encouragement from peers.

McKenzie Smith sums it up well.

“This challenge helped me learn that I would like to go further in my education with science and technology. I feel that girls today should try STEM programs so they can see if this would be a future for them. People are doing amazing things with science and technology today.”

Girls who created prosthetic hands for those in need and inspire other girls to get involved in STEM? Amazing indeed.

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This post is a part of our #StrongGirlsCan summer series. If you have missed previous posts, let me catch you up.

88 Acts of Independence and Adventure, A Photo Challenge for Tweens and Teens, #StrongGirlsCan Navigate Social Media, Being Real in an Artificial World.

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Let’s stay connected! FB, Instagram, and Twitter.

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My publisher is offerening a couple more FREE copies of my book, When More is Not Enough,  here. Go snag a copy now or point a friend in that direction.

Strong Girls Can: Raising Confident Girls in an Artificial World

Welcome to our Strong Girls Can summer series for moms of tweens and teens!

Today we have a special guest in the house. I’d like you to meet Brenda Yoder, author, speaker, mom, and all around expert on all things tween and teen. It’s an honor to share a little web space with her. Here’s Brenda.

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I’ve had a hard time writing this post. Amy asked me to write on principle #10 in Who Do You Say I Am? The chapter includes five truths about being a confident young woman in an artificial world.

I wasn’t sure why this post was difficult. There are so many topics to highlight—insecurity, gender roles, unwritten rules. The complicated life of womanhood.

Then, I was reminded of God’s simple design for men and women while reading Elisabeth Elliot’s Keep a Quiet Heart. Elisabeth writes,“If men and women were surer of their God, there would be more genuine manliness, womanliness, and godliness in the world, and a whole lot less fear of each other.”

It’s really that simple. Raising confident girls doesn’t need to be complicated or have dissertations written. Being confident in how God made you and what He’s called you to is what it means to be confident.

It’s that timeless and simple.

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Here are seven truths your daughter should know so she can walk in securely and confidently in who she is: (These are included in chapter 10 of Who Do You Say I Am.)

There’s nothing inferior about you because you’re a girl. You’ll hear derogatory comments of someone doing a task “like a girl.” It quietly tells you’re less than your male siblings or classmates. You’re not. Your value is completely in who God has created you to be, not in what others think about your gender.


If someone rejects you or doesn’t give you a chance because you’re a girl, don’t take it personally. It’s their problem, not yours. As much as the world says men and women have equality in the workforce, in society, or in church, there are discrepancies. Don’t be discouraged or alarmed if you’re discriminated against because of your gender. It’s not God’s perfect plan. As you seek Him to open doors, His ways will prevail. Lean into God when people disappoint you. He cares about you.


Being a strong, confident girl is not always going to be easy. The world is full of other girls/women and boys/men whose insecurity keeps them jealous, envious, and petty. When your confidence in rooted in Christ, you don’t need to fear others or how they perceive you.


Theres’ s a difference in having a confident appearance and being “hot.” You want to look nice, so find your style and what you feel comfortable wearing. Wear it with confidence – this makes you attractive and beautiful. Remember, how you present yourself is what others will think of you.


Boys may be intimidated by confident girls, but don’t change who you are because of it. It’s just the way it is, but it’s not God’s design.


Jesus wants to be your first love before a boy, husband, or anyone else. As you get to know Christ intimately and how crazy He is about you, your confidence will be rooted in Him. Confidence doesn’t come in performing or doing good things, but in resting in how much He loves you. As you learn to love Jesus first, the other things in your life will fall into place. You’ll be free from insecurities that pull you down.


God intends you to be who He’s created you to be for His honor and glory. That’s it. Being a strong woman is part of who He’s created women to be. A beautiful woman is one who pursues and knows God and His perfect will for her life. It’s one who can stand in the presence of others with insecurities and knows it’s not personal to her—that others, less secure in who they are, can only gain their confidence from God, too.

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If you’d like to purchase Who Do You Say I Am: 10 Tips to Help Teens Be Real in an Artificial World, for your teen or tween girls, visit brendayoder.com.

About Brenda

Brenda is an author and speaker with a Master’s Degree in Clinical Mental Health Counseling and a BA in Education. After teaching middle school and high school, she’s a currently a school counseling professional with a private practice. She was twice awarded the “Powerful Connection” award for teachers.

She’s a parenting columnist for 10 To 20 Parenting, Choose Now Ministries, and Whatever Girls. Brenda has been featured in Chicken Soup For The Soul:Reboot Your Life and two books, Who Do You Say I Am and Balance, Busyness, and Not Doing It All are releasing in 2015. Her ministry, Life Beyond the Picket Fence, can be found at brendayoder.com where she writes about faith, life and parenting beyond the storybook image. Brenda is a wife and mom of four children, ranging from middle school to young adult.

Brenda is active on Facebook, Pinterest, and Twitter.

Strong Girls Can: 10 Apps Tweens Dig and You Will Too

Welcome back to Strong Girls Can, a summer series for moms and daughters!

This week we are talking apps. Sure, some apps are mindless time sucks.

“Why yes, I am thirty-one!” says the person who uploaded at least five pictures before achieving my desired age. How-Old.Net is absolutely brilliant. It is not a time suck at all. I repeat, not a time suck, especially when it says you are thirty-one.

With over 1.4 million apps available to us (and hundreds of thousands more being created every year) it’s impossible to keep up.

Here is a list of current favorites.

1.  Dubsmash. Dubsmash mixes audio from you and video from your favorite songs, TV shows, and random YouTube videos.

2. FaceQ. FaceQ allows you to make avatars. Here’s one my daughter made. This is supossed to be me. Raise your hand if you find it strange that she has me saying, “single”. Okay, just checking.

3. Pic Collage. An app that allows you to make your photos into collages. You can add photos from the web, background, text, and stickers.

4. Donate a Photo. You take a photo and donate it to Johnson and Johnson. In turn, they donate $1.00 to the cause of your choice. Share photos from your phone and do good all with one click.

5. Magisto. A video editing app which gives you cool effects for  your videos. Ask me about the videos our girl made of our cat who is not allowed in the house, who happens to wear a bib and be playing with a Barbie in all videos…in the house.

6. Trivia Crack. You will know the answers to these trivia questions, and you will feel smart. Who doesn’t like to feel smart?

7. Crossy Road. Try not to get hit by cars and trains (think an updated version of Frogger for all miss the days of Atari).

8. Spotify. Spotify allows you to make playlists of your favorite music.

9. Retrica. An app to create effects for photos.

10. Clone Camera. Just in case you have ever wanted a clone.

Do you have any tween friendly apps to add to our list? What apps are the people in your world into?

Photo credit: Morgue File.

Strong Girls Can: Tween/Teen Photo Contest Winner

Thanks to everyone who participated in our #StrongGirlsCan tween/teen photo contest. The results are in. Dance around, throw your hands in the air, toss confetti!

The winner of this contest was determined by Patty Christopher of Patty Christopher Photography and Girls Empowering Girls Everywhere. Thank you, Patty! Patty was looking for a single photo which captured the spirit of a strong girl. In addition, color, composition, and light were also factors in determining a winner.

Below you will find notes from Patty on four of her favorite #StrongGirlsCan photos. Keep scrolling, and you will discover an additional photo I found unique. To all of the girls who submitted, thanks for showing us the world through your lens.

#StrongGirlsCan Photo Contest Winner

Little Girl by Holden B. age 10

Notes from our judge, Patty: First, this girl is so stinkin’ cute! Great focus on her eyes and good composition. Love the message that even at this young age, girls can help others.

Photo Credit: Holden B. age 10

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Addtional Top Three Photos

1.  Guitar by Auburn B. age 11

Notes from our judge, Patty: I love the depth of field in this picture. The guitar strings create “leading lines” that draw the eye from one hand to the other. Good focus on her forward fingers. The pink fingernails are great.

Photo Credit: Auburn B. age 11

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2.  Three Girls by Holden B. age 10

Notes from our judge, Patty: Shot from behind is a unique perspective. Great depth of field (girls in focus, other people not), and good lighting. Again, fantastic message of young girls helping others.

Photo Credit: Holden B. age 10

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3.  Pink Fingernails and Football by Auburn B. age 11

Notes from our judge, Patty: LOVE this message… that we can embrace feminine things, like pink fingernails, and still be strong. Great focus on subject and depth of field.

Photo Credit: Auburn B. age 11

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Amy’s fave

Strong Girls Inspire Other Strong Girls by Ellie V. age 11 Notes from Amy: This submission struck me because it was different than all of the others. Eleanor Roosevelt was one of the most active first ladies in history and a leader who fought for humanitarian causes her entire life. Thanks for reminding us of her importance, Ellie!

Photo Credit: Ellie V. age 10

Thanks again to everyone who participated! Holden, a fun prize pack is headed your way. We will see you next week when our focus will be 10 Apps Tweens Love and You Will Too! Until then, are you working on any acts of independence and adventure? We are!

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FREE BOOKS. My publisher loaded a slew of copies of When More is Not Enough on BookGrabbr (yes, no “e” in BookGrabbr!). Anyway, if you haven’t had a chance to pick up my book, click over and grab a free copy or share this link with a friend!

START A SNOWBALL GRANT. Remember when our girl won a Start a Snowball grant? Start a Snowball just wrote a snazzy little write-up about her big win on their site. Start a Snowball empowers kids to make a difference.

Strong Girls Can: Talking to Tween Girls about Dating

About a month ago, I dropped off my daughter at a dodgeball game. The game was at an unfamilar school, and my girl would only know a couple kids. Music blared from inside the gym. Kids in matching dodgeball uniforms (complete with face paint) raced passed my car. Silly String clouded the air. The energy level pulsed.

My girl lept out of the car, and I teared-up as I watched a sea of tweens and teens swallow her.

“That was fast,” I sighed as my car rolled  forward. I thought my daughter would inch towards independence, not throw herself from a moving vehicle at it. But I guess that’s what she has been doing for the last twelve years. Inching.

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Welcome to Strong Girls Can, a summer series for moms and daughters. Every Monday we meet here and discuss a different topic. If you are joining us for the first time today, yay! Make sure you sit back and check out previous posts including Tweens and Social Media, 88 Acts of Independence and Adventure, and our #StrongGirlsCan Photo Contest (submission deadline is this Friday, June 27th).

Today we are talking about tweens and dating, and we are tapping into the mad knowledge of the author of 10 Ultimate Truths Girls Should Know, parenting expert, and mama of four girls, Kari Kampikas.

Keep scrolling to read the interview as Kari answers questions and offers practical advice for moms (and girls!) about dating.

Question #1 for Kari: When should we start conversations with our girls about dating?

I believe conversations about the way boys should treat girls should start early. I’m big on boys respecting girls (and vice versa) and noticing which boys act as protectors. For instance, while visiting my 4th grader’s class for Parent Day, I saw one boy pick up his baby sister, prop her on his hip, and proudly carry her over to his circle of friends. It was clear by watching him how much he loved her, and that anyone who messed with his sister would have to deal with him. I later shared this observation with my girls, telling them to look for that kind quality in the boys they select as friends. You can tell early which kids show good character and will have your back if a situation arises.

I’ve seen that around 5th and 6th grade, the boys and girls start noticing each other and interacting through texts. Although it may be years before girls actually go on dates (in families like ours, the hope is to delay it as long as possible), I think this age presents a good opportunity to start discussing a healthy dating philosophy.

Thoughts from Kari about tweens and dating

Keep your relationship “in the light” – which essentially means clean and innocent. Never do or say anything you wouldn’t want people to know about, or text a message you wouldn’t want your father and I to read – especially since we’ll be reading your texts to guide you in the wise use of technology.
Don’t text a boy first. You can respond if he texts you, but let him initiate the conversation. Also, keep it short and sweet. It’s a waste of time to spend hours a day texting.
If a boy ever asks for an inappropriate picture, ditch him. That’s an automatic strike and a huge red flag that you don’t need him in your life.
Set a high bar for the boys you allow in your life (as well as a high bar for yourself). Look for protectors, not predators.
Trust your gut. When a guy gives you a funny feeling or negative vibe you can’t shake, there’s a reason.
Boys can make great friends. Even when you have a crush, focus first on developing a strong friendship, because friendship is what takes a relationship from good to great.

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Question #2 for Kari: What are three points girls should think about before dating?

1. Your best relationships will draw you closer to God and the people who love you most. If a boy tries to come between you and God (or between you and your loved ones), he wasn’t sent by God.

2. Chase your dreams, not boys. If you’re on the right path – listening to the Lord’s call for you, and pursuing the passions He’s placed in your heart – the right boy will show up at the right time. God will make sure of that!

3. Be firm in your identity before you date. Know that your worth and value come from being God’s child, not from the acceptance or rejection of a boy. Boys will come and go, but God is forever.

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Question #3 for Kari: What are healthy and unhealthy signs girls should watch for when in a relationship?

Healthy: When you drop your books in the hallway, he stops to help you pick them up.

Unhealthy: When you drop your books in the hallway, he laughs and calls you a klutz.

Healthy: He’s loving toward his mom, polite to waitresses, and respectful of women.

Unhealthy: He ignores his mom, is rude to waitresses, and is a little too obsessed with your appearance and the appearance of other girls (never missing an opportunity to tell you how HOT someone is!).

Healthy: He wants to be part of your world and get to know the people important to you.

Unhealthy: You only go out with his people, because your people aren’t cool enough. He only cares about his world, not yours.

Healthy: He’s honest, kind, compassionate, and steady. You can count on him to do the right thing and stand by his values.

Unhealthy: He lies about little things – like saying he and his buddy stayed in Friday night, when really they went to the movies – and tells stories that don’t add up. He cuts you down around his friends and never stands up for his values because 1. he doesn’t have any and 2. he lacks a backbone.

Healthy: He opens doors for you, gives you his jacket when you’re cold, and insists on paying when you go out.

Unhealthy: He lets doors slam in your face, fails to notice when you’re uncomfortable, and often asks you to pay because he’s run out of money. “Going dutch” is a beautiful concept to him.

About Kari

Kari Kubiszyn Kampakis is a mom of four girls, as well as an author, speaker, and blogger from Birmingham, Alabama. Her first book, 10 Ultimate Truths Girls Should Know, was written for teens and tweens and is now available through stores and online at Amazon, Barnes and Noble, Books-A-Million, and Christianbook.com. Kari’s work has been featured on national platforms like The Huffington Post and The Good Men Project and reflects her passion for family and God. Learn more by visiting www.karikampakis.com or connecting with Kari on Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, or Pinterest.

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Your turn. Think back. What’s the best piece of advice you received regarding dating? What words do you want to pass along to your girl?

*Kari will pick her favorite piece of advice from a comment here or on my FB page and that person will win a free copy of her book 10 Ultimate Truths Girls Should Know. Perfect for you or for the mama of girls in your life! Thanks, Kari.

Strong Girls Can: A Photo Contest for Tween and Teen Girls

It’s time for the Strong Girls Can tween and teen photo contest. Eeek! Can you see me clapping my hands? Can you hear my voice hitting that semi-annoying pitch it does when I squeal like a kid on the last day of school?

If you are just joining our series, let me catch you up. #StrongGirlsCan is a summer series for moms and daughters. Every Monday, we talk about raising strong girls.

The goal of the #StrongGirlsCan photo contest is to encourage tween and teen girls to think about the attributes which make girls strong. Is it physcial attributes? Knowledge? Loyalty? Skills? Faith? Do strong girls speak with boldness, take risks, ride skateboards, read?

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I’d like to introduce you to our guest photographers. Meet Renee, runner, chaser, red velvet cake maker. She’s a photographer from Georgia who has the unique gift of using the photos she takes to tell stories about her subjects.

I’d also like you to meet Patty of Patty Christopher Photography and Girls Empowering Girls. Patty is a passionate about capturing who her subjects really are and not just what they look like. Patty is also our fabulous photo contest judge.

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Contest Info

Who can enter? Girls ages 8-18 with the consent of a parent or legal guardian.

Where should girls submit photos? Send them to AmyLSullivan12@gmail.com.

Can participants submit more than one photo? Absolutely, please do.

How long does the #StrongGirlsCan contest run? From Monday, June 15 until Friday, June 26, 2015. The winner will be announced on June 29, 2015 on AmyLSullivan.com.

What will the winner receive? The winner will receive a $10.00 Barnes and Noble gift card, a copy of the book Who Do You Say I Am? 10 Tips to Help Teens Be Real in an Artificial World, and the game Bean Boozled (yes, this is the game where you choose to eat jellybeans, which taste like lawn clippings, old cheese, and dog food! Imagine the fun).

Can you submit a photo for a friend? Nope, please only submit photos you take.

Does the photo need to include pictures of girls? No. Photos can include people, but photos can also be pictures of objects or situations.

Are photos allowed to be edited and enhanced? Sure.

If girls (or moms) are on social media, should they share the pictures they take? Please do! If you put the hashtag #StrongGirlsCan within your post, we can all follow along and peek at what other strong girls are doing.

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Other official info and what our judge wants to see

The winner will be judged based on merit by Patty Christopher. By participating, entrants agree to allow Amy L. Sullivan to share submitted photos via social media.

Our judge will  be looking to see if the photo fits with the #StrongGirlsCan theme? Does it capture the spirit of a strong girl? In addition to theme, color, composition, and light will all be factors in determining the winning shot.

And now a few photo taking tips from Renee.

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Dear Strong Girls,

Before you take your camera (or phone, or tablet or ipod) and start shooting, consider these six tips.

Try a different perspective. Consider squating down, standing on a chair, or tilting your camera to a different angle. A new perspective makes photos interesting.


Stay away from forced poses. Give yourself time to ease into situations. Observe first and think about the image you are trying to capture. If your shots are rushed, they won’t look natural.


Keep clicking! A good photographer will take 20 photos and only get one or two good ones. Don’t be discouraged. Keep taking pictures.


The rule of thirds. Every picture can be broken into thirds. Photographers mentally divide pictures up using two horizontal lines and two vertical lines. Then, they place important parts of the photo where the lines intersect.


Stay away from the flash. When possible, always go for natural light.
Use filters and graphics sparingly. There are so many fun filters and graphics available, but make sure enhancing a photo doesn’t take away from it.

Good luck!

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If your girl is still in need of inspiration, check out the list of 88 Acts of Independence and Adventure for girls.

Whew! I think we covered everything. Remember to send all entries to AmyLSullivan12@gmail.com by Friday, June 26th. Now, get clicking. I can’t wait to see what our strong girls come up with!

Your turn: Do you have any questions about the contest? Hit me.

Strong Girls Can: Social Media for Tweens and Teens

When I was in eighth grade, I ate an entire row of Oreos in one day. I dunked those little cream-filled cookies in milk, and when the perfect sogginess was achieved, I popped each cookie in my mouth. Again and again and again and again.

Later that day, I felt sick. The Oreos were delicious. I just had too many. If I would have stuck to two or three cookies, I wouldn’t have been nauseous.

When I think of social media and tweens and teens, I think about those Oreos. Snacking on social media can be fine, binging on social media leaves us ill.

As a parent, I want to stick the cookies (or anything else which could harm my kids) on the top shelf of our food pantry, out of sight and out-of-reach. However, I know placing hard things out-of-reach is only a temporary fix. My kids are resourceful. They can slide a chair over to the pantry, place a stool on top of the chair, stand on their tiptoes, and snag what they want anyway, just ask me about the old Easter candy.

Social media isn’t going away. So, how do we teach our kids to snack on it in a healthy way?

Yeah, yeah, yeah, social media is bad for kids

There is no lack of research telling us about the dangers of unsupervised social media use by teens and tweens.

News outlets share stories of sexting, cyber bullying, secret accounts, and teens whose wobbly self-esteem balances on the number of likes achieved in one day, but let’s talk about the positive aspects of social media.

I don’t want to have this conversation.

I would actually rather pull a splinter out of my eye. Believe me when I say, I want my girl to head out to our front yard, make forts, and climb trees all the live long day. I’d really like it if she would forget about social media and take up canning or possibly calligraphy.

But that’s not reality, and I know the hardest conversations are often the best conversations. So, let’s do this thing.

5 Positive Aspects of Social Media

1.  Social media is a way for kids to be social. Like it or not, social media is another way kids socialize. When we were their age, we picked up the phone and had awkward conversations. Our kids comment on and like photos. It allows them to create stronger bonds with people they already know.

2.  Supervised independence. While watching my favorite neighbor boy’s last baseball game, I heard a mother talking not-so-quietly with her son.

“I saw what you posted, and I want you to know I read every word you write, and every comment your friends write!”

Bam! Good job, good mama. Good job. If we stay actively engaged with our kids social media accounts, we can catch glimpses of how our children act when we aren’t around.

3. Campaigns and conversations for good. Positive campaigns and conversations initiated by teens are happening via social media.

4.  A platform for your girl to share her voice. Some of my daughter’s friends make videos about evangelizing. These videos come complete with songs, dancing, and acting. The videos are well thought out, and are not prompted by adults.

5.  Encourage hobbies and interests. The Do-It-Yourself tutorials are endless. I am not interested in crafts, but my girl is, and she can watch a YouTube video to teach her how to make a fringe T-shirt or an oragami bird.

5 Ways to Help Your Girl Navigate Social Media

1.  Talk about the word “stranger”. This video of moms and daughters is the perfect conversation starter.

2.  Start small. We let my daughter have a Pinterest account. It’s not exactly hip among the tween crowd, but it gives her a little of the freedom she desires, and as parents, we get to ease into social media.

3.  Keep up-to-date. Do you know about Secret? YikYak? Snapchat? If you find it overwhelming to keep up with the latest and greatest apps and platforms, consider following sites who do the work for you. Two I follow are Common Sense Media and iParent.

4.  Consider drawing up a social media contract. This is a contract we like. It talks about not sharing passwords, online expectations, and consquences for not following the contract.

5.  Be a good role model. Teach your girl about snacking on social media and not binging. This means putting our phones down too.

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Your turn. How are you handling social media with your girl? What guidelines have you set-up? Any tips? Tricks? Resources?

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Every Monday we discuss topics related to raising strong girls. Did you see 88 Acts of Independence and Adventure from last week? Up next week is information on a photo contest for teens and tweens complete with a guest judge and prizes. See you next Monday!

Strong Girls Can: Social Media for Tweens and Tweens

When I was in eighth grade, I ate an entire row of Oreos in one day. I dunked those little cream-filled cookies in milk, and when the perfect sogginess was achieved, I popped each cookie in my mouth. Again and again and again and again.

Later that day, I felt sick. The Oreos were delicious. I just had too many. If I would have stuck to two or three cookies, I wouldn’t have been nauseous.

When I think of social media and tweens and teens, I think about those Oreos. Snacking on social media can be fine, binging on social media leaves us ill.

As a parent, I want to stick the cookies (or anything else which could harm my kids) on the top shelf of our food pantry, out of sight and out-of-reach. However, I know placing hard things out-of-reach is only a temporary fix. My kids are resourceful. They can slide a chair over to the pantry, place a stool on top of the chair, stand on their tiptoes, and snag what they want anyway, just ask me about the old Easter candy.

Social media isn’t going away. So, how do we teach our kids to snack on it in a healthy way?

Yeah, yeah, yeah, social media is bad for kids

There is no lack of research telling us about the dangers of unsupervised social media use by teens and tweens.

News outlets share stories of sexting, cyber bullying, secret accounts, and teens whose wobbly self-esteem balances on the number of likes achieved in one day, but let’s talk about the positive aspects of social media.

I don’t want to have this conversation.

I would actually rather pull a splinter out of my eye. Believe me when I say, I want my girl to head out to our front yard, make forts, and climb trees all the live long day. I’d really like it if she would forget about social media and take up canning or possibly calligraphy.

But that’s not reality, and I know the hardest conversations are often the best conversations. So, let’s do this thing.

5 Positive Aspects of Social Media

1.  Social media is a way for kids to be social. Like it or not, social media is another way kids socialize. When we were their age, we picked up the phone and had awkward conversations. Our kids comment on and like photos. It allows them to create stronger bonds with people they already know.

2.  Supervised independence. While watching my favorite neighbor boy’s last baseball game, I heard a mother talking not-so-quietly with her son.

“I saw what you posted, and I want you to know I read every word you write, and every comment your friends write!”

Bam! Good job, good mama. Good job. If we stay actively engaged with our kids social media accounts, we can catch glimpses of how our children act when we aren’t around.

3. Campaigns and conversations for good. Positive campaigns and conversations initiated by teens are happening via social media.

4.  A platform for your girl to share her voice. Some of my daughter’s friends make videos about evangelizing. These videos come complete with songs, dancing, and acting. The videos are well thought out, and are not prompted by adults.

5.  Encourage hobbies and interests. The Do-It-Yourself tutorials are endless. I am not interested in crafts, but my girl is, and she can watch a YouTube video to teach her how to make a fringe T-shirt or an oragami bird.

5 Ways to Help Your Girl Navigate Social Media

1.  Talk about the word “stranger”. This video of moms and daughters is the perfect conversation starter.

2.  Start small. We let my daughter have a Pinterest account. It’s not exactly hip among the tween crowd, but it gives her a little of the freedom she desires, and as parents, we get to ease into social media.

3.  Keep up-to-date. Do you know about Secret? YikYak? Snapchat? If you find it overwhelming to keep up with the latest and greatest apps and platforms, consider following sites who do the work for you. Two I follow are Common Sense Media and iParent.

4.  Consider drawing up a social media contract. This is a contract we like. It talks about not sharing passwords, online expectations, and consquences for not following the contract.

5.  Be a good role model. Teach your girl about snacking on social media and not binging. This means putting our phones down too.

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Your turn. How are you handling social media with your girl? What guidelines have you set-up? Any tips? Tricks? Resources?

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Every Monday we discuss topics related to raising strong girls. Did you see 88 Acts of Independence and Adventure from last week? Up next week is information on a photo contest for teens and tweens complete with a guest judge and prizes. See you next Monday!

Strong Girls Can: A Summer Series for Moms and Daughters

Recently, a friend told me I have six more summers with my daughter. Six. Six summers until we are outfitting my girl’s dorm room. Six summers until the world calls her an adult. Six summers until my daughter no longer bounces around our house chomping on sour cream and chive potato chips. Six.

How can this be? I just delivered the girl last week. Last week, I gave birth, and the doctors and nurses told my husband and I we could take our baby home from the hospital. We thought this was an insane idea. I mean, hello, we just met the kid, and we didn’t know anything about babies. We put our girl in a very uncomfortable (but extremely adorable) outfit. We fumbled with the dreaded, fifty pound bucket seat, and then we slowly drove forty-five miles an hour and headed home.

“What are we supposed to do now?” I wondered aloud. My husband shrugged, and we decided to go to Burger King (?). I ordered onion rings, and that is the last thing I remember, onion rings.

Now, I only have six more summers with my beauty, the one who is all legs and full of endless stories and high-pitched giggles. The one who forces me to open my eyes wide and sip each day slowly.

And it was this thought which prompted me to think about our summer series, Strong Girls Can.

Our family has loads of unscheduled summer lounging in our future (trust me, we dominate spending time together in a nonstructured way), but I also want to be intentional with my girl. Therefore, every Monday from now through mid-August, we are going to talk about our girls, and I’d love for you to join us.

Extreme goodness including an essay contest for tweens and teens, special guest interviews, free girly loot, product and book reviews, and photo challenges is all planned.

So what do you say? Are you in? Fingers crossed, fingers crossed.

My prayer is the conversations we start here trickle down into the conversations you have with your girl.

Participation is easy. Just show up here each Monday.

Ready? Let’s do this.

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To kick-off our series, my girl and I made this list for you. It is a list promoting independence and adventure. This list longs to hang on your refrigerator. Go ahead, and take down the school lunch menu, and you will have the perfect spot for it (scroll down, and you can print it off because it is also a snazzy printable). This list contains 88 acts of adventure and independence for girls. It lists perfect ways to spend time together, starting points for conversations, ideas for battling the beast of boredom, and reminders for our girls to play hard. Plus, if your girl is anything like mine, she loves a good checklist, and her little adventurous self can check off items as she goes.

Understand how-to use a circuit breaker
Learn to code
Tread water
Determine if someone has a fever
Identify editable flowers
Create a short film
Read a book in one day
Catch a baseball
Make a slingshot
Rock climb
Design a website
Identify local trees
Iron
Create an outdoor fort
Check the oil in a car
Throw a Frisbee
Memorize Scripture
Throw a baseball
Sew a button
Make an obstacle course
Play jacks
Paddleboard
Understand how-to consume information online (in a healthy way!)
Design a kite that really flies
Make jam
Mow the grass
Learn to use a hammer
Catch a frog
Complete a 1000 piece puzzle
Climb a tree
Run a 5K
Drive a boat
Make bread
Volunteer
Bake a cake from scratch
Grow vegetables
Learn two jump rope songs
Build a zipline
Play football
Come up with a catchphrase
Build a fire
Learn how-to mind map
Kayak
Say no
Learn a new languag
Chop wood
Sew curtains
Make a candle
Design and build a mini-waterpark
Put a chain on a bicycle
Pitch a tent
Paint a room
Create a budget
Reupholster a chair
Study bees
Use a rope swing to jump into a lake
Write a poem
Read a map
Handwrite a two-page letter
Learn basic substitutions for cooking
Learn how-to treat minor burns
Start a rock collection
Invent something new
Take a class
Do a handstand in the lake
Learn to ride a horse
Stand up for a friend
Play a musical instrument
Treat a minor cut
Learn to skateboard
Identify poison ivy
Hang a swing in a tree
Put a chain back on a bike
Read a book over 100 years old
Inflate a flat bike tire
Cook over a campfire
Speak in front of a group
Ride a bike no-handed
Write a book
Jump a car
Play hopscotch
Design a video game
Attend a rally
Ride a skateboard
Hike a mountain
Read the Bible
Try out for something
Ask for help when you need it

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Should you want a copy of our list, ’tis yours (Strong Girls Can: 88 Acts of Independence and Adventure). Should you want to create your own Strong Girls Can list, do it!

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I will see you next Monday, friends.

Until then, keep me posted on strong girl happenings in your house.

Share photos of what your strong girl is up to (or have her share them) via social media or email me pics at AmyLSullivan12.com. Make sure to tag me and use the hashtags #StrongGirlsCan and #RaisingGirls. Here’s to summer, strong moms, and strong girls!

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Pssst. Let’s connect via FB and Instagram.