Stylo Fantome's Blog - Posts Tagged "vanilla"
Let's Talk About Sex, Baby (but not you and me, cause that would be weird …)
(WARNING: I DO TALK ABOUT SUBJECT MATTER THAT'S IN THE BOOK. NO SPOILERS, BUT I KNOW SOME PEOPLE LIKE TO GO INTO A BOOK COMPLETELY BLIND)
Okay, I'm gonna keep it 110% real with y'all, I've decided. So let's do it. Let's talk about SEX.
I have talked about this in posts on Facebook, but I'll repeat some stuff. 98% of the world is going have, has had, and will continue to have, sex. The big nasty. So basically, EVERYONE is doing it, but most people act like it's the biggest, dirtiest secret ever. Um, most people breathe, too, but we don't treat that like it's a dirty little secret. Should we? For god's sake, we also pee and poop, and even those aren't treated as taboo as sex, which is just weird, in my opinion.
I like sex. I'm going to assume most of you do, too. Feels pretty awesome, is usually a lot of fun. I'm gonna hope most of you have the same feelings about it, and if you don't …, I am very, very sorry.
I don't care what people are into – I, myself, to be completely honest, am pretty vanilla. I do not own a sex swing or any ball-gags. Not that I am against those things, they just don't hold too much appeal for me, personally. However, if my husband were to show up at home with a riding crop and handcuffs, I wouldn't say no thank you, either.
So now that you have an idea of the way my tastes run, I hope it shows my thinking regarding my own story. I do not do the things Tate and Jameson do, though I do find them kind of sexy. What's really strange, though, coming from such a vanilla person – I didn't find it dark. I didn't realize that's what it was, when I was writing it. I didn't realize it till I started reading the reviews.
Abusive? Dark? It's all consensual – Tate literally begs for half the stuff Jameson does to her; she MAKES him do some of the things, almost against his will. Several times, throughout the story, he checks with her, asks her if what they're doing is okay. Asks if she thinks there is something wrong with him. I actually worried that would take away from his Alpha-“cred”.
Is it abuse, if one person is asking for it (literally, not figuratively) and the other person is hesitant to deliver?
What does it say about me, that I didn't find these things dark? I thought I was writing about two people who liked kinky, aggressive, “different” sex. I didn't even start using the word “sadomasochistic” till I saw the reviews. I just knew I didn't want to write ANOTHER bondage story. I wanted to write about a different kind of sex-story. The sex never bothered me, never scared me or made me uncomfortable.
I'm very glad I wrote it this way, though, for a lot of different reasons. One of my beta readers, after reading it, told me: “it was creepy, some of the sex scenes were almost verbatim what goes on in bed between my husband and I, it's so nice to see it out there. Nice to know other people are like us.” See? It's all a fantasy, and I'm glad I could represent that for some people. Another reader told me she read parts of the story to her fiancee and then asked him if they could try some of those things out. WOW! I asked her if they had, and was told “ooohhh, yeah. It was AWESOME.” I was flattered beyond words.
I don't want anyone to EVER pee on me, but hey, some people are into it. You go, guys. Good for you. Some people like to have needles inserted into various body parts. Wow. Very brave. And some people like it with the lights off, laying down, nice and quiet. Whatever works for you!
I have just been feeling …, torn? Wondering what is wrong with me, that I didn't find the story dark and/or abusive. I mean, hey, I've read The Dark Duet, and this book ain't that (love those stories, BTW). The way Jameson treats her isn't right, that's for sure – but as a person. That's when he truly turns into Satan. I never associated that with the sex they had; that was something different.
Ultimately, I am very thankful for the positive responses I have gotten, and I am glad that for a small group of people, I could represent them – though I almost don't feel worthy, considering I'm representing something I don't necessarily take part in.
And I hope if you're reading this, if you've read the book, you'll also read the second one and see all the different sides Jameson has to offer. Hard, soft, abusive, giving, generous, jealous …, who knows, maybe even loving?
Oh god, sweetness. Now THAT makes me ill. Give me filthy language and heavy hands any day …
(sounds an awful lot like the devil talking, doesn't it?)
Okay, I'm gonna keep it 110% real with y'all, I've decided. So let's do it. Let's talk about SEX.
I have talked about this in posts on Facebook, but I'll repeat some stuff. 98% of the world is going have, has had, and will continue to have, sex. The big nasty. So basically, EVERYONE is doing it, but most people act like it's the biggest, dirtiest secret ever. Um, most people breathe, too, but we don't treat that like it's a dirty little secret. Should we? For god's sake, we also pee and poop, and even those aren't treated as taboo as sex, which is just weird, in my opinion.
I like sex. I'm going to assume most of you do, too. Feels pretty awesome, is usually a lot of fun. I'm gonna hope most of you have the same feelings about it, and if you don't …, I am very, very sorry.
I don't care what people are into – I, myself, to be completely honest, am pretty vanilla. I do not own a sex swing or any ball-gags. Not that I am against those things, they just don't hold too much appeal for me, personally. However, if my husband were to show up at home with a riding crop and handcuffs, I wouldn't say no thank you, either.
So now that you have an idea of the way my tastes run, I hope it shows my thinking regarding my own story. I do not do the things Tate and Jameson do, though I do find them kind of sexy. What's really strange, though, coming from such a vanilla person – I didn't find it dark. I didn't realize that's what it was, when I was writing it. I didn't realize it till I started reading the reviews.
Abusive? Dark? It's all consensual – Tate literally begs for half the stuff Jameson does to her; she MAKES him do some of the things, almost against his will. Several times, throughout the story, he checks with her, asks her if what they're doing is okay. Asks if she thinks there is something wrong with him. I actually worried that would take away from his Alpha-“cred”.
Is it abuse, if one person is asking for it (literally, not figuratively) and the other person is hesitant to deliver?
What does it say about me, that I didn't find these things dark? I thought I was writing about two people who liked kinky, aggressive, “different” sex. I didn't even start using the word “sadomasochistic” till I saw the reviews. I just knew I didn't want to write ANOTHER bondage story. I wanted to write about a different kind of sex-story. The sex never bothered me, never scared me or made me uncomfortable.
I'm very glad I wrote it this way, though, for a lot of different reasons. One of my beta readers, after reading it, told me: “it was creepy, some of the sex scenes were almost verbatim what goes on in bed between my husband and I, it's so nice to see it out there. Nice to know other people are like us.” See? It's all a fantasy, and I'm glad I could represent that for some people. Another reader told me she read parts of the story to her fiancee and then asked him if they could try some of those things out. WOW! I asked her if they had, and was told “ooohhh, yeah. It was AWESOME.” I was flattered beyond words.
I don't want anyone to EVER pee on me, but hey, some people are into it. You go, guys. Good for you. Some people like to have needles inserted into various body parts. Wow. Very brave. And some people like it with the lights off, laying down, nice and quiet. Whatever works for you!
I have just been feeling …, torn? Wondering what is wrong with me, that I didn't find the story dark and/or abusive. I mean, hey, I've read The Dark Duet, and this book ain't that (love those stories, BTW). The way Jameson treats her isn't right, that's for sure – but as a person. That's when he truly turns into Satan. I never associated that with the sex they had; that was something different.
Ultimately, I am very thankful for the positive responses I have gotten, and I am glad that for a small group of people, I could represent them – though I almost don't feel worthy, considering I'm representing something I don't necessarily take part in.
And I hope if you're reading this, if you've read the book, you'll also read the second one and see all the different sides Jameson has to offer. Hard, soft, abusive, giving, generous, jealous …, who knows, maybe even loving?
Oh god, sweetness. Now THAT makes me ill. Give me filthy language and heavy hands any day …
(sounds an awful lot like the devil talking, doesn't it?)
