Ken Poirot's Blog - Posts Tagged "evil"
I went Jesus and the money changers on them...
Confronting Evil
None of us is perfect and this is not meant to be a sermon on right, wrong, or religion.
This is a call to action against evil in all forms in our society.
Unfortunately, we are exposed to evil on a daily basis. I believe we, as a society, have an obligation to confront evil when we see it, to protect ourselves, to protect the weak, and to stop evil from inflicting harm on others.
Whether you are religious or not, I see it as our obligation to society to confront evil.
To be complicit when we encounter evil, or when we are wronged severely, knowing the same evil will befall our brothers and sisters of this world, is to allow evil to expand. It is up to us to eradicate evil, to prevent it from harming others around us, therefore, halting the spread of evil in its tracks.
My goal with this discussion is not to preach one religion over others, as I believe all the major religions of the world have at their core tenets loving thy neighbor and trying to lead a good life. I have a firm belief in religious tolerance and I accept all who contribute positively to society as a whole.
I have never set out to harm others or actively gone looking for evil, yet it seems there are those in society who do set out to prey on others. Especially those who present themselves as good, decent, and kindhearted people. I will say, for some, it seems nice and kind people appear as a weak or easy target.
No matter how many times I have warned people in my life to not take advantage of my good nature, there are still those who do not heed such warnings.
For those instances where I have seen the face of evil and confronted it, the guiding question I always ask myself is, "If not me then who?" Meaning, if I am not strong enough to confront evil, then who else will?
Confronting evil takes strength and courage. Unfortunately, the majority of people do not have the strength or the courage to take a stand.
I once heard a statement, "If you have no enemies it means you have never stood for anything." Standing up for what is right and confronting evil is not an easy task. Yet, if we all show more bravery and strength in the face of evil, then evil will have no place to hide in our society.
I challenge us all to not allow evil to grab a foothold, take refuge, or shelter in this world.
Have the courage and the strength to battle evil! For not to do so, is to be complicit and allow evil to multiply, spread, and prosper, to further prey on others.
Due to my upbringing and background, the only way I know how to frame a discussion on evil is to reference a book for which most of us are familiar, The Bible.
The Bible's Message on Confronting Evil
So what does the Bible say about our obligation to confront evil?
Psalm 94:16
Matthew 18:15-17
From the passages above, what the Bible tells us is that people have a divine obligation to stand up to and stamp out evil!
We are all called upon to confront those who commit evil against others.
In fact, the Bible is very explicit that if someone who is conducting evil will not listen to us one-on-one, or with a few others, we are told to call out the evil acts publicly; to make sure everyone knows about it so together, we as a society can rebuke and cast out evil.
Christians often ask, "What would Jesus do?," in certain situations they encounter in life. What I would remind everyone is Jesus was not always the quiet, "turn the other cheek" person we mostly associate with our thoughts.
Let us look at a situation when Jesus confronted evil with force, specifically, when the money changers were conducting business, cheating people, and doing so in his Father's house (church).
John 2:15
Mark 11:15
Oh my! This does not sound like the quiet, passive Jesus Christ figure we all think about, does it? Putting cords together to form a whip, chasing after people, physically over-throwing their tables, and driving them out. Sounds a bit angry/violent, doesn't it?
It is clear this is a firm message about the need to stand up against evil. Specifically, in this case, it is an example of acts which were cheating others.
The Fate of Some Evildoers in The Bible
Let us not forget the fate of some in the Bible who were considered evil, which seems in direct contrast to the commandment, "Thou shalt not kill."
There are many of these cases in the Bible, Sampson, Moses and the Egyptians, Sodom and Gomorrah, Noah and the Flood, David and Goliath, etc... just to name a few.
Let's look at the classic story of David and Goliath to see what the Bible says:
1 Samuel 17: 49-54
Now, I am not advocating violence or illegal means to stamp out evil. What I am saying is, there is a clear message that we all have an obligation to confront evil.
I will give you an example from my life when I confronted evil legally, using the courts to make a stand.
My Personal David Versus Goliath Story
In my youth I landed a job for a large multi-billion dollar company, which promised to teach me a new profession while paying a stable salary of $24,000 per year plus earned commissions.
This was a very large company and the offer was written in black and white, so who would question such a printed statement, made in good faith (seemingly), by such a well-known, large American company, right?
Well, unfortunately, after working for the initial probationary period of 12 weeks (a test to get into the company), during which the company withheld all commissions, everything changed.
The "salary" became a draw, and then expenses were also added that were expected to be paid. None of this was stated up front, and in fact, the written offer pledged a $24,000 per year salary plus commissions (no mention of any draw and no mention of any expenses).
Many people in the same program at the time, were much older than me, married, had family obligations, mortgages, car payments, education expenses for children, etc... In other words, a lot of people suffered in their marriages, financially, and personally due to this blatant lie.
Approximately 16,000+ people went through the same program over the decades before me. Per my knowledge, none of them were strong enough to take a stand and do anything about it.
So I said, "If not me then who?," to myself. If I am not strong enough to stop this, and it appears that most are not (16,000+ others in this case), I must do something about this to prevent others from suffering the same fate!
For this reason, I used an image of David slaying Goliath to depict the quote, "If not me then who? Confront evil!," which you can see here:
https://www.goodreads.com/photo/autho...
So I sued the multi-billion dollar company...little twenty-something me. I am bound by a confidentiality clause to not identify the dollar amount of the settlement (which was minimal after attorney's fees), but I did force the multi-billion dollar company, by using our legal system, to change; I made them stop cheating people.
I confronted evil; I did it legally and within the confines of modern civil society using the courts. I made the company see it was going to be potentially very expensive to continue their wrongdoings (imagine a class action lawsuit with 16,000+ other people as the class), so I forced them to change their actions moving forward.
Due to my stand against evil, the company changed their program and began paying a real salary (not a draw minus surprise expenses).
Unfortunately, this is not my first or last confrontation with evil. It is just one example I can point to where I can honestly say, I performed my obligation. I stood up to a large company and by doing so I defended myself and protected others against future evil acts.
So if you are a Christian, and you often ask yourself, "What would Jesus do?," then I will remind you about the story in the Bible of Jesus and the money changers.
Whether you are religious or not, and regardless of your religious affiliation, I will say, it is in the best interest of society as a whole for everyone to confront evil.
I believe we are all obligated as a society to confront evil, stamp out evil, and to do our best to prevent evil from hurting others who might be preyed upon.
I will say with that large corporation, I am glad "I went Jesus and the money changers on them." The end result was I protected others in the future from suffering a similar fate to me; I took a stand and because of it, no one else would get cheated in the same manner as me.
Here is this quote depicted in graphic form with a photo quote:
http://www.goodreads.com/photo/author...
Think of this the next time you are victimized by evil. Ask, "If not me then who?," take a stand, and do what Jesus would do (or what you feel is right based upon your religious or personal beliefs).
Together, we really can make the world a better place for everyone. We just have to make a commitment to have the courage and strength to confront evil, call it out, and not allow evil to spread or victimize others.
Have the courage and the strength to confront evil!
Warmly,
Ken Poirot
Mentor Me: GA=T+E—A Formula to Fulfill Your Greatest Achievement
Ken Poirot
None of us is perfect and this is not meant to be a sermon on right, wrong, or religion.
This is a call to action against evil in all forms in our society.
Unfortunately, we are exposed to evil on a daily basis. I believe we, as a society, have an obligation to confront evil when we see it, to protect ourselves, to protect the weak, and to stop evil from inflicting harm on others.
Whether you are religious or not, I see it as our obligation to society to confront evil.
To be complicit when we encounter evil, or when we are wronged severely, knowing the same evil will befall our brothers and sisters of this world, is to allow evil to expand. It is up to us to eradicate evil, to prevent it from harming others around us, therefore, halting the spread of evil in its tracks.
My goal with this discussion is not to preach one religion over others, as I believe all the major religions of the world have at their core tenets loving thy neighbor and trying to lead a good life. I have a firm belief in religious tolerance and I accept all who contribute positively to society as a whole.
I have never set out to harm others or actively gone looking for evil, yet it seems there are those in society who do set out to prey on others. Especially those who present themselves as good, decent, and kindhearted people. I will say, for some, it seems nice and kind people appear as a weak or easy target.
No matter how many times I have warned people in my life to not take advantage of my good nature, there are still those who do not heed such warnings.
For those instances where I have seen the face of evil and confronted it, the guiding question I always ask myself is, "If not me then who?" Meaning, if I am not strong enough to confront evil, then who else will?
Confronting evil takes strength and courage. Unfortunately, the majority of people do not have the strength or the courage to take a stand.
I once heard a statement, "If you have no enemies it means you have never stood for anything." Standing up for what is right and confronting evil is not an easy task. Yet, if we all show more bravery and strength in the face of evil, then evil will have no place to hide in our society.
I challenge us all to not allow evil to grab a foothold, take refuge, or shelter in this world.
Have the courage and the strength to battle evil! For not to do so, is to be complicit and allow evil to multiply, spread, and prosper, to further prey on others.
Due to my upbringing and background, the only way I know how to frame a discussion on evil is to reference a book for which most of us are familiar, The Bible.
The Bible's Message on Confronting Evil
So what does the Bible say about our obligation to confront evil?
Psalm 94:16
"Who will rise up for me against the evildoers? or who will stand up for me against the workers of iniquity?"
Matthew 18:15-17
"Moreover if thy brother shall trespass against thee, go and tell him his fault between thee and him alone: if he shall hear thee, thou hast gained thy brother.But if he will not hear thee, then take with thee one or two more, that in the mouth of two or three witnesses every word may be established. And if he shall neglect to hear them, tell it unto the church..."
From the passages above, what the Bible tells us is that people have a divine obligation to stand up to and stamp out evil!
We are all called upon to confront those who commit evil against others.
In fact, the Bible is very explicit that if someone who is conducting evil will not listen to us one-on-one, or with a few others, we are told to call out the evil acts publicly; to make sure everyone knows about it so together, we as a society can rebuke and cast out evil.
Christians often ask, "What would Jesus do?," in certain situations they encounter in life. What I would remind everyone is Jesus was not always the quiet, "turn the other cheek" person we mostly associate with our thoughts.
Let us look at a situation when Jesus confronted evil with force, specifically, when the money changers were conducting business, cheating people, and doing so in his Father's house (church).
John 2:15
"And when he had made a scourge of small cords, he drove them all out of the temple, and the sheep, and the oxen; and poured out the changers' money, and overthrew the tables..."
Mark 11:15
"And they come to Jerusalem: and Jesus went into the temple, and began to cast out them that sold and bought in the temple, and overthrew the tables of the money changers, and the seats of them that sold doves..."
Oh my! This does not sound like the quiet, passive Jesus Christ figure we all think about, does it? Putting cords together to form a whip, chasing after people, physically over-throwing their tables, and driving them out. Sounds a bit angry/violent, doesn't it?
It is clear this is a firm message about the need to stand up against evil. Specifically, in this case, it is an example of acts which were cheating others.
The Fate of Some Evildoers in The Bible
Let us not forget the fate of some in the Bible who were considered evil, which seems in direct contrast to the commandment, "Thou shalt not kill."
There are many of these cases in the Bible, Sampson, Moses and the Egyptians, Sodom and Gomorrah, Noah and the Flood, David and Goliath, etc... just to name a few.
Let's look at the classic story of David and Goliath to see what the Bible says:
1 Samuel 17: 49-54
"And David put his hand in his bag, and took thence a stone, and slang it, and smote the Philistine in his forehead, that the stone sunk into his forehead; and he fell upon his face to the earth.
So David prevailed over the Philistine with a sling and with a stone, and smote the Philistine, and slew him; but there was no sword in the hand of David.
Therefore David ran, and stood upon the Philistine, and took his sword, and drew it out of the sheath thereof, and slew him, and cut off his head therewith. And when the Philistines saw their champion was dead, they fled.
And the men of Israel and of Judah arose, and shouted, and pursued the Philistines, until thou come to the valley, and to the gates of Ekron. And the wounded of the Philistines fell down by the way to Shaaraim, even unto Gath, and unto Ekron.
And the children of Israel returned from chasing after the Philistines, and they spoiled their tents.
And David took the head of the Philistine, and brought it to Jerusalem; but he put his armour in his tent."
Now, I am not advocating violence or illegal means to stamp out evil. What I am saying is, there is a clear message that we all have an obligation to confront evil.
I will give you an example from my life when I confronted evil legally, using the courts to make a stand.
My Personal David Versus Goliath Story
In my youth I landed a job for a large multi-billion dollar company, which promised to teach me a new profession while paying a stable salary of $24,000 per year plus earned commissions.
This was a very large company and the offer was written in black and white, so who would question such a printed statement, made in good faith (seemingly), by such a well-known, large American company, right?
Well, unfortunately, after working for the initial probationary period of 12 weeks (a test to get into the company), during which the company withheld all commissions, everything changed.
The "salary" became a draw, and then expenses were also added that were expected to be paid. None of this was stated up front, and in fact, the written offer pledged a $24,000 per year salary plus commissions (no mention of any draw and no mention of any expenses).
Many people in the same program at the time, were much older than me, married, had family obligations, mortgages, car payments, education expenses for children, etc... In other words, a lot of people suffered in their marriages, financially, and personally due to this blatant lie.
Approximately 16,000+ people went through the same program over the decades before me. Per my knowledge, none of them were strong enough to take a stand and do anything about it.
So I said, "If not me then who?," to myself. If I am not strong enough to stop this, and it appears that most are not (16,000+ others in this case), I must do something about this to prevent others from suffering the same fate!
For this reason, I used an image of David slaying Goliath to depict the quote, "If not me then who? Confront evil!," which you can see here:
https://www.goodreads.com/photo/autho...
So I sued the multi-billion dollar company...little twenty-something me. I am bound by a confidentiality clause to not identify the dollar amount of the settlement (which was minimal after attorney's fees), but I did force the multi-billion dollar company, by using our legal system, to change; I made them stop cheating people.
I confronted evil; I did it legally and within the confines of modern civil society using the courts. I made the company see it was going to be potentially very expensive to continue their wrongdoings (imagine a class action lawsuit with 16,000+ other people as the class), so I forced them to change their actions moving forward.
Due to my stand against evil, the company changed their program and began paying a real salary (not a draw minus surprise expenses).
Unfortunately, this is not my first or last confrontation with evil. It is just one example I can point to where I can honestly say, I performed my obligation. I stood up to a large company and by doing so I defended myself and protected others against future evil acts.
So if you are a Christian, and you often ask yourself, "What would Jesus do?," then I will remind you about the story in the Bible of Jesus and the money changers.
Whether you are religious or not, and regardless of your religious affiliation, I will say, it is in the best interest of society as a whole for everyone to confront evil.
I believe we are all obligated as a society to confront evil, stamp out evil, and to do our best to prevent evil from hurting others who might be preyed upon.
I will say with that large corporation, I am glad "I went Jesus and the money changers on them." The end result was I protected others in the future from suffering a similar fate to me; I took a stand and because of it, no one else would get cheated in the same manner as me.
Here is this quote depicted in graphic form with a photo quote:
http://www.goodreads.com/photo/author...
Think of this the next time you are victimized by evil. Ask, "If not me then who?," take a stand, and do what Jesus would do (or what you feel is right based upon your religious or personal beliefs).
Together, we really can make the world a better place for everyone. We just have to make a commitment to have the courage and strength to confront evil, call it out, and not allow evil to spread or victimize others.
Have the courage and the strength to confront evil!
Warmly,
Ken Poirot
Mentor Me: GA=T+E—A Formula to Fulfill Your Greatest Achievement
Ken Poirot
I lost EVERYTHING…
The Abyss of Emotional Bankruptcy
I could feel the warm, moist trail drip slowly, eventually overcome inertia, then roll quickly down my nose and cheek as each drop struck my pillow.
I do not remember leaving my bed for a month, but I must have as I would eat something from time to time.
I would later write, “The worst feelings are the warm, anxious burning that portends your heart breaking followed by the wave of numbness that asphyxiates your soul.”
An apt description for that month of my life.
I stopped living and I suffered in silence.
Men are not supposed to hurt, cry, and feel emotionally bankrupt; isn’t that what our Western society tells us? We are supposed to be strong and unshakeable; how could I ever tell others I was so dead inside?
How could I share how I felt when no one else would truly understand?
Anything to End the Pain
I just wanted to be alone and I did not want to live anymore.
I thought about running my car in the garage; buying a hose, affixing it to the tailpipe, and directing the exhaust inside my car.
At least then I would be comfortable in my leather cocoon and leave this world while residing forever in the house I built.
It was not just the most recent event that completely emptied my soul, it was a culmination of what transpired over the last five years; this was the final act of betrayal that ultimately drowned me in the ocean of hopelessness.
The Happiest Day of My Life
Just one week before was the happiest day of my life.
I had finally found the love of my life.
We had spent ten magical days together culminating in our announcement that we were planning on getting married, declared during a dinner I hosted for her friends and family.
Everyone was supportive and happy for us.
Yet, the minute I left town, this girl who knew all about me, knew about my hardships, struggles, and all the hurt of my past, the girl who squeezed my hand in happiness when we announced our plans for marriage at that same dinner, abruptly and without warning cut off all communication with me.
Evil Comes in Many Forms
I found she had been playing me the whole time, recruiting her friends and family to help deceive me. They fulfilled their roles well leading me to believe I had just made many new friends.
Instead, they were all lying to me.
They all knew she had a long-term boyfriend, and this was just a game to them. It was not enough for them to just hurt me though.
When I tried to speak to her friends and family, they blocked me on social media and sent me messages laughing at me because they enjoyed the cruelty of torturing me.
She herself told me that she “got what she wanted from me.” In other words, taking out her friends and family multiple times, the gifts, my generosity, warmth, care, and all the money I found out she made off me; all her goals had been achieved and accomplished in her mind.
She had seduced everything she wanted from me, therefore, according to her, she had no need to speak to me again.
I do not know what was worse, the pain I was feeling, the calculating coldness of those who wantonly set out to harm me, or the hurt I could hear in my mother’s voice when I told her the news, simply replying, “She used you.”
My friends and family were expecting to soon be greeting a new addition to our lives; the love of my life whose wedding plans had just been announced to the support of all in her intimate close-knit circle.
No One Understands
When I did talk to people about her, they would just say, “Get over it.” They did not understand the extent of my attachment, the six to eight hours a day of constant conversations for six months, the hole that was left, not just in my life but in my soul.
Nor did they understand the culminating affect the previous five years had on my complete devastation and destruction.
The downward spiral had begun in 2008. My boss, who I had trusted, sacked me in a surprise meeting with HR.
After seven years of loyal service, working my way up to run the department and growing it exponentially by over 83% from $8.5 million to over $15.6 million in revenue, while increasing the profit margin from 27% to 37%, they fired me on the spot.
I had invested wholeheartedly in my career with the company. I had worked tirelessly, even giving up much earned vacation time to drive the success of my department.
I was recognized nationally by my peers; often I was asked to speak at different events across the country, to explain why my department was doing so well at a time when the entire industry was experiencing stagnation or contraction.
It did not matter that my company had a policy of "progressive discipline" that required a verbal warning, written warning, and then probationary period before an employee was fired. My boss and HR threw out all the rules and terminated me right there with no warning. One of the HR managers even sadistically smiled at me as they fired me.
A Career in Ruins
I would sue them and battle them for years through depositions and attorneys.
The three of them who fired me, including my boss, could not come up with a consistent, unified reason why they fired me. In the end, I would stare in my ex-boss’ eyes as she answered questions.
I finally concluded that even though the success I was having in driving growth for our department made her look good, she was jealous of my achievements.
That same department would later fall apart in my absence and the company would settle with me before we went to court.
During that time, I had found another position as a regional manager with a different bank.
My coworkers were supportive and often consulted me on important decisions. I was treated with respect and my boss would seek advice from me on pressing matters.
Unfortunately, that bank did not make it through the financial crisis, and two years later it failed.
We closed as one bank on a Friday and opened as another bank the following Monday; that was how the FDIC handled bank failures during the financial crisis.
Right before Christmas, all of us managers were given our walking papers and I, once again, found myself unemployed.
After landing a new job as a regional manager six months later, enduring the misery of working with and for a bunch of truly nasty people, those positions also disappeared.
My professional career working for others ended at that point.
Left With Nothing and More Betrayal
Unfortunately, as my wife had already left, the financial markets had eroded my lifetime savings, and my money had dried up, I was now facing an imminent foreclosure as I could not keep my house afloat.
To top it all off, I had also recently been betrayed by someone else I had loved.
Unbeknownst to me, my girlfriend had decided it was time to have a baby. She did not tell me, but she had covertly stopped taking her birth control pills. I would later learn from her friends that she had told them she wanted to secretly get pregnant on purpose, to force me into moving our relationship to the next level immediately, per her timetable.
I was happy when she showed me the sonogram and told me we were having a baby. I was going to be a father for the first and only time in my life; it was a glorious occasion.
Yet, this same girl, once she was granted the commitment she always wanted from me, would sneak off into the night and have an abortion. She changed her mind as quickly and clandestinely as she had made her original decision. The news devastated me and ended our relationship.
She would later tell me she regretted what she did and she wanted to get back together with me.
Needless to say, I told her that was not going to happen.
The Final Betrayal and All Is Lost
All the hurt and pain of those previous five years had taken its toll on me.
In spite of this, I was willing to give love and happiness a chance. I was taking the risk to trust again with a girl who professed to have a conscious, moral compass, and who promised to treat me right.
Yet instead, the love of my life, the girl with whom we had just announced our future plans for marriage in front of her friends and family, who knew about all this previous hurt and pain in my life, took great pleasure in lying, cheating, using me, and then tossing me away once she got all she wanted.
After all I had been through, and with the latest blow, I just wanted the hurt and pain to stop.
In addition, at this moment my home was soon going to be at risk. My money was dwindling and I was about to be late on my mortgage for the first time ever.
I called my bank to work with them, but to my surprise, they began an aggressive campaign to try to take my house illegally.
I contacted an attorney and tried to sell my home, but the local housing market was in turmoil.
Per the attorney, the bank finally agreed to leave me alone until a specific date, at which time if my house was not sold, I had to turn it over to them.
Unfortunately, that date came and went without a buyer. I had to get rid of everything: all my furniture, paintings, personal possessions, and anything I could not fit into my car.
I lost my house.
Everything I once had was gone except for a solitary carload consisting mostly of clothes along with my cat. In truth, if not for my cat, as sad as it sounds, I may not be here today.
What did I do next? How does the story end?
Resurrection and Reinvention of Self
There are a few things I decided during this time in my life. I focused on the successes and not the failures I had achieved over the years and I decided to reinvent myself.
I also realized I had a message of hope to share with others.
All I ever wanted to do in life was help other people. With this goal in mind, I began to write.
As I wrote in my first book, which was written at this most difficult time in my life, “At that darkest moment, while drowning in the Abyss of Emotional Bankruptcy, reflect on this universal truth: the difference between success and failure is one more time.”
I took what I learned during these difficult times, I chose to look back at the accomplishments in my life, and to do my best to be a positive influence on others. If you read my book, “Mentor Me: GA=T+E—A Formula to Fulfill Your Greatest Achievement,” now you know where I was emotionally and mentally when I wrote it.
My sole purpose was to turn this terrible time in my life into an opportunity to have a positive impact on other people. As I wrote in the book, “I feel the reason we are all here, our purpose of being, is to help others find their little piece of happiness and heaven right here on earth.”
I do not know where you are in life or what you are going through. Some of you have difficulties greater than mine. My wish is that you can get through these hard times in your life and “Be the light that inspires others to dream.”
“Light can devour the darkness but darkness cannot consume the light.”
Once you realize that you hold the power to change your life for the better and that nothing can extinguish your light, you will realize you are ultimately in control of your destiny when you make the conscious decision to move forward.
Everyone Has Hurt and Pain In Their Lives
We all go through tough times in life. No one is immune from difficulties.
Even after everything I endured, I am better now, and more importantly, I am better for it.
Furthermore, I also know that money cannot bring happiness but I know financial problems and the stress it causes can become all consuming.
I understand because I have lived it.
Success and Overcoming Adversity
“Wisdom comes from making mistakes, having the courage to face them, and make adjustments moving forward based upon the knowledge acquired through those experiences.”
I have always been told, and it seems true, no one cares about your story until you finally make it.
When you are down and out not only does the world not seem to care, but unfortunately, there are sometimes those who actively enjoy kicking you and keeping you down.
In the end, "Mentor Me: GA=T+E—A Formula to Fulfill Your Greatest Achievement," became a bestseller on Amazon.
Furthermore, I am now quoted every single day in social media worldwide.
Each day my words inspire people all over the world; I achieved my ultimate goal of being a positive influence on people's lives.
Maybe someone, somewhere in the world can relate to my story, hold onto the knowledge that they can and will eventually overcome all of today’s hurt and pain, then have the courage to get up one more time and turn things around.
Whatever the obstacle, you can overcome it and achieve success as long as you just keep moving forward.
I hope by sharing my story that these words find their way to inspire others to rise above their current circumstances and keep going.
Warmly,
Ken Poirot
Mentor Me: GA=T+E—A Formula to Fulfill Your Greatest Achievement
I could feel the warm, moist trail drip slowly, eventually overcome inertia, then roll quickly down my nose and cheek as each drop struck my pillow.
I do not remember leaving my bed for a month, but I must have as I would eat something from time to time.
I would later write, “The worst feelings are the warm, anxious burning that portends your heart breaking followed by the wave of numbness that asphyxiates your soul.”
An apt description for that month of my life.
I stopped living and I suffered in silence.
Men are not supposed to hurt, cry, and feel emotionally bankrupt; isn’t that what our Western society tells us? We are supposed to be strong and unshakeable; how could I ever tell others I was so dead inside?
How could I share how I felt when no one else would truly understand?
Anything to End the Pain
I just wanted to be alone and I did not want to live anymore.
I thought about running my car in the garage; buying a hose, affixing it to the tailpipe, and directing the exhaust inside my car.
At least then I would be comfortable in my leather cocoon and leave this world while residing forever in the house I built.
It was not just the most recent event that completely emptied my soul, it was a culmination of what transpired over the last five years; this was the final act of betrayal that ultimately drowned me in the ocean of hopelessness.
The Happiest Day of My Life
Just one week before was the happiest day of my life.
I had finally found the love of my life.
We had spent ten magical days together culminating in our announcement that we were planning on getting married, declared during a dinner I hosted for her friends and family.
Everyone was supportive and happy for us.
Yet, the minute I left town, this girl who knew all about me, knew about my hardships, struggles, and all the hurt of my past, the girl who squeezed my hand in happiness when we announced our plans for marriage at that same dinner, abruptly and without warning cut off all communication with me.
Evil Comes in Many Forms
I found she had been playing me the whole time, recruiting her friends and family to help deceive me. They fulfilled their roles well leading me to believe I had just made many new friends.
Instead, they were all lying to me.
They all knew she had a long-term boyfriend, and this was just a game to them. It was not enough for them to just hurt me though.
When I tried to speak to her friends and family, they blocked me on social media and sent me messages laughing at me because they enjoyed the cruelty of torturing me.
She herself told me that she “got what she wanted from me.” In other words, taking out her friends and family multiple times, the gifts, my generosity, warmth, care, and all the money I found out she made off me; all her goals had been achieved and accomplished in her mind.
She had seduced everything she wanted from me, therefore, according to her, she had no need to speak to me again.
I do not know what was worse, the pain I was feeling, the calculating coldness of those who wantonly set out to harm me, or the hurt I could hear in my mother’s voice when I told her the news, simply replying, “She used you.”
My friends and family were expecting to soon be greeting a new addition to our lives; the love of my life whose wedding plans had just been announced to the support of all in her intimate close-knit circle.
No One Understands
When I did talk to people about her, they would just say, “Get over it.” They did not understand the extent of my attachment, the six to eight hours a day of constant conversations for six months, the hole that was left, not just in my life but in my soul.
Nor did they understand the culminating affect the previous five years had on my complete devastation and destruction.
The downward spiral had begun in 2008. My boss, who I had trusted, sacked me in a surprise meeting with HR.
After seven years of loyal service, working my way up to run the department and growing it exponentially by over 83% from $8.5 million to over $15.6 million in revenue, while increasing the profit margin from 27% to 37%, they fired me on the spot.
I had invested wholeheartedly in my career with the company. I had worked tirelessly, even giving up much earned vacation time to drive the success of my department.
I was recognized nationally by my peers; often I was asked to speak at different events across the country, to explain why my department was doing so well at a time when the entire industry was experiencing stagnation or contraction.
It did not matter that my company had a policy of "progressive discipline" that required a verbal warning, written warning, and then probationary period before an employee was fired. My boss and HR threw out all the rules and terminated me right there with no warning. One of the HR managers even sadistically smiled at me as they fired me.
A Career in Ruins
I would sue them and battle them for years through depositions and attorneys.
The three of them who fired me, including my boss, could not come up with a consistent, unified reason why they fired me. In the end, I would stare in my ex-boss’ eyes as she answered questions.
I finally concluded that even though the success I was having in driving growth for our department made her look good, she was jealous of my achievements.
That same department would later fall apart in my absence and the company would settle with me before we went to court.
During that time, I had found another position as a regional manager with a different bank.
My coworkers were supportive and often consulted me on important decisions. I was treated with respect and my boss would seek advice from me on pressing matters.
Unfortunately, that bank did not make it through the financial crisis, and two years later it failed.
We closed as one bank on a Friday and opened as another bank the following Monday; that was how the FDIC handled bank failures during the financial crisis.
Right before Christmas, all of us managers were given our walking papers and I, once again, found myself unemployed.
After landing a new job as a regional manager six months later, enduring the misery of working with and for a bunch of truly nasty people, those positions also disappeared.
My professional career working for others ended at that point.
Left With Nothing and More Betrayal
Unfortunately, as my wife had already left, the financial markets had eroded my lifetime savings, and my money had dried up, I was now facing an imminent foreclosure as I could not keep my house afloat.
To top it all off, I had also recently been betrayed by someone else I had loved.
Unbeknownst to me, my girlfriend had decided it was time to have a baby. She did not tell me, but she had covertly stopped taking her birth control pills. I would later learn from her friends that she had told them she wanted to secretly get pregnant on purpose, to force me into moving our relationship to the next level immediately, per her timetable.
I was happy when she showed me the sonogram and told me we were having a baby. I was going to be a father for the first and only time in my life; it was a glorious occasion.
Yet, this same girl, once she was granted the commitment she always wanted from me, would sneak off into the night and have an abortion. She changed her mind as quickly and clandestinely as she had made her original decision. The news devastated me and ended our relationship.
She would later tell me she regretted what she did and she wanted to get back together with me.
Needless to say, I told her that was not going to happen.
The Final Betrayal and All Is Lost
All the hurt and pain of those previous five years had taken its toll on me.
In spite of this, I was willing to give love and happiness a chance. I was taking the risk to trust again with a girl who professed to have a conscious, moral compass, and who promised to treat me right.
Yet instead, the love of my life, the girl with whom we had just announced our future plans for marriage in front of her friends and family, who knew about all this previous hurt and pain in my life, took great pleasure in lying, cheating, using me, and then tossing me away once she got all she wanted.
After all I had been through, and with the latest blow, I just wanted the hurt and pain to stop.
In addition, at this moment my home was soon going to be at risk. My money was dwindling and I was about to be late on my mortgage for the first time ever.
I called my bank to work with them, but to my surprise, they began an aggressive campaign to try to take my house illegally.
I contacted an attorney and tried to sell my home, but the local housing market was in turmoil.
Per the attorney, the bank finally agreed to leave me alone until a specific date, at which time if my house was not sold, I had to turn it over to them.
Unfortunately, that date came and went without a buyer. I had to get rid of everything: all my furniture, paintings, personal possessions, and anything I could not fit into my car.
I lost my house.
Everything I once had was gone except for a solitary carload consisting mostly of clothes along with my cat. In truth, if not for my cat, as sad as it sounds, I may not be here today.
What did I do next? How does the story end?
Resurrection and Reinvention of Self
There are a few things I decided during this time in my life. I focused on the successes and not the failures I had achieved over the years and I decided to reinvent myself.
I also realized I had a message of hope to share with others.
All I ever wanted to do in life was help other people. With this goal in mind, I began to write.
As I wrote in my first book, which was written at this most difficult time in my life, “At that darkest moment, while drowning in the Abyss of Emotional Bankruptcy, reflect on this universal truth: the difference between success and failure is one more time.”
I took what I learned during these difficult times, I chose to look back at the accomplishments in my life, and to do my best to be a positive influence on others. If you read my book, “Mentor Me: GA=T+E—A Formula to Fulfill Your Greatest Achievement,” now you know where I was emotionally and mentally when I wrote it.
My sole purpose was to turn this terrible time in my life into an opportunity to have a positive impact on other people. As I wrote in the book, “I feel the reason we are all here, our purpose of being, is to help others find their little piece of happiness and heaven right here on earth.”
I do not know where you are in life or what you are going through. Some of you have difficulties greater than mine. My wish is that you can get through these hard times in your life and “Be the light that inspires others to dream.”
“Light can devour the darkness but darkness cannot consume the light.”
Once you realize that you hold the power to change your life for the better and that nothing can extinguish your light, you will realize you are ultimately in control of your destiny when you make the conscious decision to move forward.
Everyone Has Hurt and Pain In Their Lives
We all go through tough times in life. No one is immune from difficulties.
Even after everything I endured, I am better now, and more importantly, I am better for it.
Furthermore, I also know that money cannot bring happiness but I know financial problems and the stress it causes can become all consuming.
I understand because I have lived it.
Success and Overcoming Adversity
“Wisdom comes from making mistakes, having the courage to face them, and make adjustments moving forward based upon the knowledge acquired through those experiences.”
I have always been told, and it seems true, no one cares about your story until you finally make it.
When you are down and out not only does the world not seem to care, but unfortunately, there are sometimes those who actively enjoy kicking you and keeping you down.
In the end, "Mentor Me: GA=T+E—A Formula to Fulfill Your Greatest Achievement," became a bestseller on Amazon.
Furthermore, I am now quoted every single day in social media worldwide.
Each day my words inspire people all over the world; I achieved my ultimate goal of being a positive influence on people's lives.
Maybe someone, somewhere in the world can relate to my story, hold onto the knowledge that they can and will eventually overcome all of today’s hurt and pain, then have the courage to get up one more time and turn things around.
Whatever the obstacle, you can overcome it and achieve success as long as you just keep moving forward.
I hope by sharing my story that these words find their way to inspire others to rise above their current circumstances and keep going.
Warmly,
Ken Poirot
Mentor Me: GA=T+E—A Formula to Fulfill Your Greatest Achievement
