Daniel O'Brien's Blog, page 7
October 6, 2016
cockenblog:
A friend recently reminded me that I used to irish exit parties by saying “Can you hold...
A friend recently reminded me that I used to irish exit parties by saying “Can you hold my drink for a second?” and then never coming back.
I almost exclusively (still!) Irish exit parties and most of my friends really hate it. IF I say something, I generally either say “Oh, two seconds-” or “Let me actually run to the rest room right now and then come right back because I want to finish this.” But nine times out of ten, Daniel just disapppppeeeears, like a ghoooost or a shiiiiiitty frieeeeeend.
October 5, 2016
cracked:
The
next LIVE Cracked Podcast is Thursday, October 6th...
The
next LIVE Cracked Podcast is Thursday, October 6th – 9pm at UCBSunset
The
show is FREE and the first 50 guests will receive a FREE Cracked gift!
Cracked’s Jack O’Brien, Soren Bowie and Daniel O’Brien are joined by Andrew
Orvedahl from @grawlixcomedy and Maria Thayer – stars of #ThoseWhoCant on @trutv – to
interview real life (and probably anonymous) teachers who’ll share all the
filthy, outrageous, and hilarious tales from their supposedly squeaky clean
profession.
The Cracked Podcast LIVE Tomorrow Night
I’m doing the Cracked Podcast again but, TWIST, this time it’s totally free! I love doing this and all podcasts!
September 25, 2016
noel:
summer leftovers
Noel caught me smiling and laughing...
noel:
summer leftovers
Noel caught me smiling and laughing and aggressively white. Happy to be a part of her summer leftovers series.
cracked:
Teachers: America’s unsung heroes…and secret drunks...
Teachers: America’s unsung heroes…and secret drunks and all-around degenerates. To shed light on the dark side of this trusted occupation, The Cracked Podcast host Jack O'Brien, along with comedians and the cast of truTV’s ‘Those Who Can’t’ Maria Thayer (Abbey Logan) and Andrew Orvedahl (Coach Fairbell), will interview some real life (and probably anonymous) teachers who will share all the filthy, outrageous, and hilarious tales from this supposedly squeaky clean profession.
See The Cracked Podcast LIVE (And Free!)
I’mma be at this doing magic.
September 18, 2016
Went to the Louvre for the First Time Ever and Immediately Googled the Following Things Upon Returning to My Hotel
-Why do all of the old statues have such small dicks?
-Is anyone still making statues anymore?
-It’s nice, but why does everyone give such a big shit about the Mona Lisa?
August 22, 2016
rejectedjokes:
Sam Rockwell and I were filming a movie in...
Sam Rockwell and I were filming a movie in London when we found out auditions were being held nearby for the London company of the hit musical Hamilton! Knowing this was our only shot to audition for one our favorite musicals, we put ourselves on tape with SPOT ON, PERFECT LONDON ACCENTS to fool the director. We have yet to hear back. FYC.
For more videos go to RejectedJokes.com.
This is so delightful.
August 14, 2016
August 13, 2016
cracked:
cracked:
cracked:
In the muggle world, we’re not...
In the muggle world, we’re not given the opportunity for a magical hat to tell us which school we should go to. Usually we just have to go to the high school closest to where we live or whatever college accepts our SAT scores and personal essay. This month, our goal is to determine what would be the best fictional school to go to.
Join Jack, Daniel, the rest of the Cracked staff, along with comedians Brandie Posey, Steven Wilber, Riley Silverman, & Alison Leiby as they figure out if it’s a realistic school like Degrassi or West Beverly High, or an institution from a fantasy world like Hogwarts with its ghosts and dementors, or Bayside High, haunted by a monster known only to humans as ‘Screech.’
The Best Fictional School to Attend
Looking for something to do tomorrow night? Go see our live podcast taping!
Tonight!
Me, I’m doing this!
August 2, 2016
cracked:
Even if your school assigns a hilarious and subversive...
Even if your school assigns a hilarious and subversive book like Catch-22, it’s going to be hard for you to really fall in love with it, because you’re not thinking, “Let’s check out this book!” You’re thinking, “Shit, I have to read three chapters by Wednesday and there’s gonna be a quiz about it.” School puts reading three chapters of an amazing book in the same mental category of memorizing history dates and trying to crack calculus problems. That is, hands down, the worst fucking thing to ever happen to novels.
High school turns reading – a thing people do on the beach on vacation – into homework – a thing kids dread because it takes them away from whatever they’d rather be doing.
The way we teach history is totally bonkers too. High school and a history textbook taught me Grover Cleveland was our only president to serve two non-consecutive terms – the other books taught me that he staged a secret mouth surgery at sea over a 4th of July weekend so the American people wouldn’t find out that he had cancer.
High school and a syllabus taught me I needed to “get the right answers” on my Of Mice And Men quiz or else I’d be a failure. It’s not important as far as the class is concerned if I wept when I finished the book; what matters is what this book says about Great Depression-era literature. (I, uh … think?)
Dan O'Brien’s Guide To Bettering Our Schools
I wrote a column for the first time in many months, and you can read it right now if you want.
July 15, 2016
Tim Minchin Says
1. “Put your head down and work with pride on whatever is in front of you.”
2. “I suppose I worked hard to achieve whatever dubious achievements
I’ve achieved … but I didn’t make the bit of me that works hard, any
more than I made the bit of me that ate too many burgers… Understanding that you can’t truly take credit for your successes,
nor truly blame others for their failures will humble you and make you
more compassionate.”
3. “Define yourself by what you love.”
From here.
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