L.L. Kirchner's Blog, page 62
December 12, 2015
December 11, 2015
December 9, 2015
In A World Where… Donald Trump Is President
There is no mistaking the similarities to Adolf Hitler. When Tiffany Razzano asked us to write a piece that invoked a Trump world, I thought about how concentration camps must have started. And I submitted the following one act:
(Image Source: Atlanta Constitution Journal)
ACT ONE
A dank, basement light room with a single bulb. Gathered around a table are maybe a dozen men, listening to the radio.
RADIO ANNCR:
(Over static which gets tuned out by one of the guys listening.) We’re coming to you live from the White House, where the president has just declared a state of emergency in Texas, California and xxx, as Operation [BASEBALL MOVIE NAME] comes to a close. Here he is now.
VO of DONALD TRUMP:
At this time we’re not prepared to make good on offers of citizenship to workers in the camps. If you need details, you’ll have to ask my pressman, Ted Nugent. I don’t have time for this right now. (Sound of flashing cameras.)
RADIO ANNCR:
We’re checking…yes? Yes. That’s the shortest press conference ever held by a sitting president. Also, there’s some confusion in the pressroom, as we believe, in yesterday’s press conference, President Trump fired Mr. Nugent for Tweeting, and I quote, ‘Mr President, baaaa, he’s a sheeple like the rest of ‘em’ just after President Trump denied the use of submachine guns to armed guards in the camps.
MARIA:
(Bursting into the door.)
JORGE:
(Rises, flips off the radio. Crowd murmurs.)
Maria, what are you doing?
MARIA:
(Looks around nervously.)
JORGE:
It’s okay, no one here will tell.
MARIA:
No, Jorge. Pero, I must speak to you alone.
MARIA and JORGE leave the room together and speak from the other side of the stage.
JORGE:
Did you hear? That bastard! It’s just like I thought, he lied about citizenship. Three years in this fucking cement tomb.
MARIA:
(Puts her hand on JORGE’S chest.) They know.
JORGE:
They know you speak English? How?
MARIA:
Pero, no. Besides, I told you this months ago. They all knew. No, it’s much worse. They know I am pregnant.
JORGE:
What? No! How are you still here?
MARIA:
I think they are not sure, but tomorrow Mr Ells is making me see the doctor.
JORGE:
Oh mon dios…
MARIA:
I know. They used to come back, but I haven’t seen Rosita or Lupe since… (she trails off)
JORGE:
Do they know I’m the father?
MARIA:
(Turns away in disgust.) You are so selfish! Mami was right.
JORGE:
Oh, my dear, no. No. (Encircling Maria in his arms.) You don’t understand. We have to escape. Tonight.
MARIA:
Great idea. The guards, they love that. Target practice, they call it.
JORGE:
Yes, every night.
MARIA:
Sometimes they just pretend people are trying to escape. And now I think they’re killing us. Did it get too expensive to force the abortions? Or are they making us have the babies and give them to rigch white people who are too uptight to have their own babies.
JORGE:
Maria!
MARIA:
No. I can’t stand this anymore. The terrible food. We can’t leave this area. We don’t have the Internet or newspapers. This is prison!
JORGE:
Maria!
MARIA:
Why didn’t the cutting work on you? You bastard! This is your fault. (MARIA starts beating Jorge on the chest.)
JORGE:
Maria! Ay. I didn’t know either. It works on most of us. I think they do too many sometimes. I’m sorry. I would never make you pregnant on purpose.
MARIA:
(Weeping)
JORGE:
But listen! Tonight, the boys are going to gather everyone and run. We’re all just going to run away.
MARIA:
What? No! That’s a terrible idea. They don’t care if they kill us all! And where will we go?
JORGE:
We aren’t going anywhere. Well, not with them. Tonight I’m supposed to give Mr Ells a treatment.
MARIA:
He didn’t cancel?
JORGE:
No. They don’t know we have the radio.
MARIA:
But…
JORGE:
But nothing. The escape begins at 7:07. I’m going to bash Ells’ head in. Then we can leave through his office.
MARIA:
But what about everyone else?
JORGE:
They’re going to die anyway.
MARIA:
(Bites lip, looks downcast.)
JORGE:
It’s ten to seven. Come on. Let’s go.
Presented at Wordier Than Thou’s “Dawn of the Donald” event.
