Kathleen Rowland's Blog, page 45

Wordsmith– I also write books

Are any of you writing fiction? Besides writing my own stories, I teach classes about fiction writing techniques.  My most popular classes are those I teach online for various chapters of Romance Writers of America.  Last week I posted my original slant for “Making Sense of Time and Manipulating It” for the Savvy Authors’ blog.

Write your story in present or past tense, but be consistent.  Either is fine, but for fiction past tense is more common:

Sophia snatched up her cell.  She hoped the caller would be Garrett, but it was only Lorenda. “Oh, hi,” she said.

Here it is in present tense:

Sophia snatches up her cell.  She hopes the caller is Garrett, but it’s only Lorenda.  “Oh, hi,” she says.

Whichever tense you choose, stick with it.  If you want to continue this scene in present tense, you’d write:

Lorenda sounds excited. “You won’t believe what just happened!”

If you were to continue in past tense, you’d write:

Lorenda sounded excited.  “You won’t believe what just happened!”

What you wouldn’t do is switch from one tense to the other:

Sophia snatched up the phone.  She hoped the caller would be Garrett, but it was only Lorenda. “Oh, hi,” she said.

Lorenda sounds excited. “You won’t believe what just happened.

That switch from past to present tense was jarring, wasn’t it?

Suppose you want to let your reader know about things that happened before the time your story takes place. If you’re writing in past tense, attach the word “had” to your verbs to signal that you’ve moved back in time.

Sophia and Lorenda had been best friends since sigh school.  They’d shared ballet lessons and gymnastics.  When Sophia had failed her driver’s test, it was Lorenda who had consoled her.

If you’re writing in the present tense, add the word “has” or (plural) “have” to accomplish the same thing.

Sophia and Lorenda have been best friends since high school.  They’ve shared ballet lessons and gymnastics . . .

Once you have dealt with the prior event, you need to return your reader to the time of your story.  The way to do that is to use the word “now”.

For a past-tense story:

Now Sophia sighed.  She wished Lorenda would get off the phone.  The beep meant Garrett was calling.

For a present-tense story:

Now Sophia sighs.  She wishes Lorenda would get off the phone . . .

     As writers of commercial fiction, we minimize back story.  We sift a little in when necessary.  Flashbacks serve one purpose, and that is to present an important moment in your character’s past that has a direct bearing in the present plot of your story.  Your character’s thoughts whisk him or her to what went on before.  Although a flashback only builds tension if it’s launched at the right moment, it increases suspense by postponing the conflict resolution. The example of a flashback below is written in past tense.  The flashback is written in past perfect tense.

Note the unclear transition in the example below.  Surely the reader will get lost because the hero’s POV is weak:

Rick Listened to his Favorite Song

     Rick leaned toward the radio and turned up the volume.  It was one of his favorite songs from the ‘60s, The Brown Eyed Girl.  As the cheery “sha-la-la” chorus filled the room, he sat back and listened, remembering.  Ann Marie came in and sat down beside him.  He had asked if he wanted to stay for dinner.  He was glad he accepted.

The problem with the above is with the transition.  When did Ann Marie come in and sit down by Rick?  Was it back in the past or could it be happening now as Rick listens to The Brown Eyed Girl?

Second version, Rick Listened to his Favorite Song

     Rick dashed toward the radio and turned up the volume.  It was one of his favorite songs from the ‘60s, The Brown Eyed Girl.  It brought back the memory of one special night when Ann Marie had come in and sat beside him.  Working on a project in middle school, she had asked if he wanted to stay for dinner.  Now, as he listened to the old song, he was glad he had accepted.

The second pass at the flashback had two changes of great significance.  The first was the use of a clear transition to alert the reader that you are about to take a trip to the past.  “It brought back a memory” served this purpose.  “He remembered” would do fine, or he could ask the question, “Was it really that long ago?”

As previously mentioned, to bring an end to the flashback and return to the present, the simple “now” will suffice.  The other transition phrase, “long ago”, also indicates the flashback has ended.

The second technique used to clarify the beginning and ending flashback is verb tenses.  Notice that the first example is written in past tense.  Rick turned up the volume.  When the flashback begins, you move backward in time to past perfect tense.  This makes the action more remote.  Marie had come in.  He was glad he had accepted.  When the flashback ends, the move moves to simple past tense.  Now as he listened, he was glad.

Remember these two things to write effective flashbacks:

Provide transitional words at the beginning and end of a flashback.
Shift verb tenses to indicate time.

Give your reader a clue to what lies ahead.  A hint builds suspense.  Use it just when your reader wants more information.  After a flashback, you’ve got a reader with heightened curiosity or apprehension.  If your flashback ended a chapter, you could open the next one with something about Ann Marie:

Rick was sitting on Huntington Beach the morning after New Year’s when Ann Marie’s body washed up, half dead.

The average reader can’t stop there.  The author might add another detail:

Rick began to wish he’d never gone to see that fortune- teller.

The reader knows it’s a story about the occult, and dark forces will be at work.  Here’s another clue, using a brief flashback:

The last time Rick had talked with Ann Marie, she’d been in Los Angeles.  (Something foreshadowing could set the mood such as her fear that day, his rapture, a strange electrical storm, or why he thinks there was a murder attempt on Ann Marie.)

A flashback can be a mini-cliff hanger.  But, flashbacks are not effective if overused.  Use them to include a crucial scene.  This can happen before the true action of the book begins or somewhere in the opening scene.  Romance writers most commonly use a flashback to fill in the past relationship between a hero and heroine who knew each other before the book began.  In my reunion story and romantic suspense, WINDWARD WHISPERINGS, the hero and heroine both had flashbacks.  Their past relationship colored everything happening in the present and formed the basis of the book.  Just saying that they were involved once didn’t get across the emotional impact I wanted.

If you are writing a reunion story or any romance, you can and should have two characters talk about their issues in the course of the book.  You won’t recount every detail because they lived through it together; it wouldn’t be natural.

Some situations will beg for a flashback.  An appropriate point in your story might be following an encounter between the two of them.  Was it emotionally intense?  Is one of them thinking back to how things used to be or how things fell apart?  Use a flashback when it makes sense to you.  You will use the transition technique and the past perfect verb tense when you are within the flashback.

Flashbacks are often set off with the double-line skip.

Kathleen Rowland’s Writing Tips for Manipulating Time

 

Eat– for Good Health

Detox and get skinny with Autumn’s best health boosters.  Sweet potatoes lower blood sugar.  Per a North Carolina State study, this tasty vegetable contains a substance similar to those used in a supplement proven to control blood sugar in diabetes.  Pumpkin fights breast cancer.  Pumpkin happens to be the richest source of antioxidants called carotenes.  They’re so powerful, a Swedish study found they can reduce risk of breast cancer, even among smokers, by 60%.  Apples reduce cholesterol.  The fiber from an apple or two each day can lower bad cholesterol by 23% and overall cholesterol by an average of 14%, say Florida State scientists.  You’ll find over a hundred delicious and easy recipes in GOLD STANDARD OF THIN.

Here is a fast recipe for Pumpkin-Risotto.  Start with Lundberg’s Butternut Squash Risotto.  Cut up and cook the flesh of a small pumpkin.  Make the risotto according to package directions and then add the pumpkin.  Mash and serve piping hot.  My husband gave me a huge compliment when I made this last night– “Make this at Thanksgiving.”

Pumpkin is the richest source of antioxidants called carotenes.

People Appreciation

This baby otter found a home!  When residents of a small Alaska town discovered a baby sea otter washed up on shore, clinging to his deceased mom, they were heartbroken.  Part of a raft of otters cut off from the ocean by a frozen bay, he was the only survivor!  Without his mother’s food, warmth and protection, he would soon die.  Townsfolk were able to keep the scared crature alive with bottles of Pedialyte until experts from Alaskan SeaLife Center could take him to their center.  He became healthy but could not be returned to sea.  The Pittsburgh Zoo and Aquarium took him in.  At present he has graduated from formula to solid food– squid and small fish.  He’s still a toddler and sleeps a lot on a pile of soft towels by the pool or lying on his back and floating!  His favorite toy is a dog toy shaped like a rattle, and he’s hardly ever without it.

 Photo courtesy of Paul Selvaggio.

Eat– for Good Health

Phyllo stands in for high-fat crust in Chicken Pot Pies.  It will taste even better!

Ingredients


2 bone-in, skin-on chicken breast halves (12 to 14 ounces each)
Coarse salt and ground pepper
3 tablespoons olive oil
4 carrots, sliced 1/4 inch thick
1 medium onion, finely chopped
1/4 teaspoon dried thyme leaves
1/4 cup all-purpose flour
2 1/2 cups low-fat (1%) milk
1 package (10 ounces) frozen peas, thawed
2 tablespoons fresh lemon juice
6 phyllo sheets (each 12 by 17 inches), thawed




Directions


Preheat oven to 400 degrees. Place chicken on a rimmed baking sheet; season with salt and pepper. Roast until an instant-read thermometer inserted into thickest part of breast (avoiding bone) registers 165 degrees, 25 to 30 minutes. Let cool slightly; discard skin and bones. Shred meat, and set aside.
While chicken is roasting, heat 2 tablespoons oil in a large saucepan over medium. Add carrots, onion, and thyme; season with salt and pepper, and cook until carrots are crisp-tender, 8 to 10 minutes. Add flour, and cook, stirring, 1 minute. Gradually add milk, stirring until smooth. Cook, stirring occasionally, until mixture comes to a simmer and thickens.
Remove from heat; stir in peas, lemon juice, and chicken, and season with salt and pepper. Pour filling into a 9-inch deep-dish pie plate.
Stack phyllo on a work surface. Using a paring knife, cut out an 11-inch circle from the stack; discard trimmings. Stack 2 circles on work surface, and brush gently with 1 teaspoon oil; repeat with remaining circles and oil. Place phyllo stack over filling, and press down about 1/2 inch from the edge so phyllo fits inside rim of pie plate. Bake until golden and bubbling, 20 to 25 minutes. Let potpie cool 15 minutes before serving.

 

People craft– taking care of ourselves

In GOLD STANDARD OF THIN, we included two chapters on caring for ourselves, “Nuggets for Your Inner Self” and “Making Your World Golden,” but didn’t write about all situations.  Yesterday a reader emailed and told me she’d been deeply offended and what to do.  In her case she ate an entire chocolate cake and is back on track, but wanted to know how I’d respond when someone has offended me.  As a matter of fact, this happened to me over the weekend.  I said something that offended my grandson who is ten-years-old.  In turn, his parents (my son and daughter-in-law) phoned me up and told me I was not supporting my grandson’s dream.  This incident happened what we were asked to take care of our grandchildren for an overnight.  When my grandson had said, “I’m going to be the first person in my family to go to Stanford University,” I said, “There are many wonderful universities.  Tuition at Stanford is about $40,000 a year, and you’ll need a 3.8 GPA.”  Whoops, wrong answer from Grandma!  When my son told me to support his dream, I felt misunderstood and offended.  I understand how parents want their kids to “Shoot for the moon and even if you miss, you’ll land in the stars.”

I told my son I partially reacted because it seemed like bragging for a kid who hardly studied and had average grades.  For two miserable days, I held on to anger, bitterness and pride.  On the third day I was sick of the way I was harboring an unforgiving heart.  Sometimes we aren’t going to get justice for ourselves, but we do need self restoration.  I forgive all of us; we’re human and do not always agree.  A forgiving heart is how we can free ourselves and let it go.  I tell myself I can’t control anything outside of myself.  I did decide one thing, and that is to be careful about giving my opinion around them.  That’s okay.  My husband says he often says, “Awesome,” when he thinks otherwise.   At the moment I’m feeling peaceful.

Finding a peaceful state of mind.

Wordsmith– I also write books

Today I am running a contest which will last for a week.  Next Thursday I will announce the winner for a purse jewelry gadget called a key finder.  It will not cost you anything to enter.  The answer to the question is in my romantic suspense novel, FALLEN EVERMORE, and you can “buy” it for free on Smashwords using the coupon YX82N.  Who is Sophia’s client accused of medicating her son into a coma?  The answer is at the beginning of Chapter Three in FALLEN EVERMORE.  Please email the answer to me at this addy:  kathyrowl@aol.com and in the subject line, write “Key Finder.”  Be sure to give me your physical address.  I will draw names entered out of a box and announce the winner on Thursday, September 27th.  I will mail the cute gadget below to the lucky winner!

You’ll never have to dig in the bottom of your purse again for your keys!

People craft– taking care of yourself

Just trimming your waist so it measures 34 inches or less cuts your risk of heart disease 72%, and your risk of cancer, stroke, diabetes, depression and dementia in half.  The reason:  while other fat stores– like those on hips and thighs– merely take up space, belly-fat kick-starts a steady stream of disease-triggering inflammation.  To melt this troublemaker fast, experts recommend eating more metabolism-boosting nuts.  I am super excited about this because my favorite food concoction is trail mix!  Instead of some other snack, macadamias and other nuts contain healthy monounsaturated fats and are a fantastic source of palmitoleic acid which is also found in fish oil.  According to University of Hawaii researchers, nuts kick-start lipolysis, the burning of fat for fuel.  I do watch the quantity since I love, love, love trail mix.  Here is a food label for trail mix.  I wouldn’t do this every day, but today I’m having trail mix for lunch.

Nutrition Facts


Serving Size 1 package (50g)





Amount Per Serving



Calories from Fat 160

Calories 270





% Daily Values*


Total Fat 18g
28%



Saturated Fat 2.5g
12%



Trans Fat 0g



Cholesterol 0mg
0%


Sodium 80mg
3%


Total Carbohydrate 19g
6%



Dietary Fiber 3g
12%



Sugars 12g



Protein 9g










Vitamin A 0%

Vitamin C 0%










Calcium 4%

Iron 8%

 

Eat– for Good Health

It’s true I’m an author in tales of low and high jinks in hot places.  I’m also a specialist with an M.S. in nutrition.  Daughter Janice and I wrote GOLD STANDARD OF THIN because we wanted to share what we’ve learned about getting and staying thinner.  It’s kind of an undiet because food is of ample quantity.  Eat up (lots of fruit, whole grains, and vegetables) and slim down!

Here’s a creamy delicious potato salad for one person (lucky you)– 1 boiled, cubed medium red potato with skin, 1/2 cup each peas, diced celery, and plain low-fat yogurt, 1 tsp. low fat mayo and fresh chives, dill and salt to taste.  Enjoy with fruit.

Eat– for Good Health

To satisfy a craving I’m having for Chinese take-out which is often greasy, I’m making Beef and Broccoli Stir-fry at home.  It’s a super-fast recipe that includes fresh linguine noodles.  Half of a 9-oz package for four servings.

For my husband, I’m holding the onions and garlic, but the ingredients for most people is below?

2 1/2 Tbsp cornstarch, divided



1/4 tsp table salt



3/4 pound(s) uncooked lean trimmed sirloin beef, thinly sliced against the grain



2 tsp canola oil



1 cup(s) reduced-sodium chicken broth, divided



5 cup(s) uncooked broccoli, florets (about a 12 oz bag)



1 Tbsp ginger root, fresh, minced



2 tsp minced garlic



1/4 tsp red pepper flakes, or to taste



1/4 cup(s) low-sodium soy sauce



1/2 cup(s) water



Instructions

On a plate, combine 2 tablespoons cornstarch and salt; add beef and toss to coat.
Heat oil in a large nonstick wok or large deep skillet over medium-high heat. Add beef and stir-fry until lightly browned and cooked through, about 4 minutes; transfer to a bowl with a slotted spoon.
Add 1/2 cup broth to same pan; stir to loosen any bits on food on bottom of pan. Add broccoli; cover and cook, tossing occasionally and sprinkling with a tablespoon water if needed, until broccoli is almost crisp-tender, about 3 minutes. Uncover pan and add ginger, garlic and red pepper flakes; stir-fry until fragrant, about 1 minute.
In a cup, stir together soy sauce, remaining 1/2 cup broth, remaining 1/2 tablespoon cornstarch and water until blended; stir into pan. Reduce heat to medium-low and bring to a simmer; simmer until slightly thickened, about 1 minute.
Return beef and accumulated juices to pan; toss to coat. Serve. Yields about 1 1/4 cups per serving.

Eat– for Good Health

It’s hot here (102!) in Southern California.  I’m making a  Lobster Salad with Lemon and Basil–4 servings, 165 calories per serving.  I am also serving a fruit salad– in season peaches, melon, and grapes.  My husband has two servings and a whole wheat baguette.

Low carbohydrate, heart-healthy (1 gram of saturated fat is considered low) and low sodium, this recipe takes ten minutes to prepare.   If you don’t want to cook the lobsters, most supermarkets have cooked lobster at the fish/meat counter.

Ingredients
1/3 cup hot water
¼ cup vegetarian bouillon cube
1 clove minced garlic
3 Tbsp lemon juice
2 Tbsp chopped fresh basil
1 ½ Tbsp olive oil
Freshly ground pepper (a little goes a long way)
2 2/3 cups chopped lobster meat (four lobsters of around 1 ½ lbs yields this amount)
6 cups mixed salad greens
Lemon wedges for garnish
Stir hot water and bouillon in a medium bowl until cube dissolves. Whisk in garlic, lemon juice, basil and oil. Use pepper sparingly. Mix in lobster. Divide salad greens among 4 large plates and spoon lobster salad on top. Serve with lemon wedges.