Leila Marie Lawler's Blog, page 55

{pretty, happy, funny, real}

What is this {pretty, happy, funny, real} you speak of?

~ {pretty, happy, funny, real} ~

Capturing the context of contentment in everyday life ~

Every Thursday, here at Like Mother, Like Daughter!

Does this look a little… tired… and… ashy?

Do I?

(I’m not posting a picture of myself, though. So don’t answer that. Not even a picture of Roxie.)

Bridget is gone. She would clean this up. Me, I look at it and think, “It will just get ashes on it again, when I burn more logs, which I will do forever — even in this mildest of endless winters. What is the point of cleaning it up. Bridget will be home in June, probably.”

I’m even sluggish with the bird feeders. I’m telling the birds (but inside my head, because it’s too much energy to speak out loud), “surely there’s something out there you can find on your own… I see berries on bushes… go, birdies, go find berries.”

Sorry, I will be better today.

 

I’ve made myself a “crafting and computing nest” here on this sofa — this, below, is my {real}. I have to make myself move around. I did actually turn up with a sick headache on Tuesday and required a lot of sleep — which isn’t bad if you think that I haven’t gotten sick this winter really at all. And it does explain the sitting around, somewhat.

Wait, did I post a picture of my sofa last time?

This is getting bad and sad.

Feeling the February March blues, I must say. Let’s think about gardening, manure, seeds, and soil. Let’s not think about building fires!

I think the sun is starting to shine more! Maybe we’ll make it!

 

In blog housekeeping notes, Facebook in full thwart mode. Do you rely on having “liked” our page to be notified of posts? Here’s the thing: once the blog gets to a certain size (I guess), they start denying the posts in your feed unless we pay. They seem to know, and to be ruthless about using their knowledge against us all. But as you know, we really don’t make money on this blog! So we aren’t going to pay.

Instead, here are some thoughts for you to be sure never to miss a post, as they say: You could hover over “liked” on that page in order to turn on notifications. Normally I’d say that would be obnoxious and never do it, but not in our case! Who doesn’t want to know that some fabulous post with pictures of an ashy wood burning stove or yet another rumpled sofa are but a click away! I ask you.

Otherwise, subscribe to get new posts via email (you’ll find the box in the sidebar on your computer or at the bottom of the page if you are on your phone), or add us to your RSS feed.

In any case, we’d love to see you this week here on {pretty, happy, funny, real}!

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Ask Auntie Leila: How to fix one worry about living on one income.

Dear Justyna writes (in part):

I was and I still am stay at home mom. But — I always wonder – how people deal with fear – what if something happens to my husband – our only bread winner? I don’t have qualifications to go right back to work and support myself and my kids.

All the best, Justyna

I get a bunch of mail with this main theme: What if something happens?

Very often, it’s the husband who has trouble with the burden of being the one income-earner — it feels too risky.

Of course, this fear, beaten into us as society pushes for women to work outside the home, begs the question of what if something happens to both of you, and perhaps that highlights the indispensable role of trust and the need to accept uncertainty, since we really don’t know what the future holds.

We should also think about how even more precarious things would be at home if our lifestyle was based on two incomes, plus all the outside help needed to sustain two working parents, and one parent dies. Living simply does help when disaster strikes.

Nevertheless, as the old joke goes, “Swim, Johnny, swim!”* — That is, in addition to reminding you to trust and accept uncertainty, I am also going to fix this worry. It’s simple.

We live in a modern age where thankfully, you can buy life insurance, the purpose of which is to alleviate this fear as far as possible. God put us in a certain time, in a certain place. In the past, some people did suffer financial doom when the income-earner died or was incapacitated. Communities worked to help — the Chief’s great-great-(great?) grandfather was the forerunner to today’s Knights of Columbus insurance provision, implementing a fund to help widows bury their husbands. Such were the works of mercy at the time (and still are very necessary).

Your husband needs life insurance. Dave Ramsey recommends seven to ten times the amount of his income. Often, his work covers this need. If not, get it on your own. Make room in your budget for this item.

Here is an article that outlines the kinds of insurance. Here is a discussion of whether to insure the stay-at-home wife. (Yes, you should.)

I find it interesting, as I read that second link, that when actually imagining what a full-time worker would do to manage a home with children in it without his wife, financial planners get serious about the difficulty and stress he would face. This shows you just how vital being the manager of the home really is. It’s actually impossible to put a dollar value on it, yet when we try, we find out that it would be high.

The enterprise of making a family takes a lot of skill and time! Because we women by nature tend to do our work without boasting and beating our chests, we end up accepting the man’s view that what men do is worth more and that what we do is worthless and can be done by anyone.

It all depends on your viewpoint. When we speak in terms of the woman contributing, we think income. But as this discussion of life insurance shows, as soon as we think about the cost of not having the wife there, running things, saving money, and providing breathing room (one analyst in that discussion talks about the husband having time to be with his kids after his wife dies, versus having to use his free time to figure out food, clothing, cleaning, sick care, and so on) — suddenly we see the value of this manager.

I go into this hidden but actually indispensable role in this other Ask Auntie Leila post. Perhaps you are convinced, but still worried. Thus I recommend: Get life insurance!

___________________

*Have you heard that joke? The little boy’s rowboat is sinking out on the lake. His mother, standing on the shore, wrings her hands and calls out, “Pray, Johnny, pray!”

His Dad, also on the shore, also worried, shouts, “Swim, Johnny, swim!”

 

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{bits & pieces} and yes we’re doing MuTu

The weekly “little of this, like of that” feature here at Like Mother, Like Daughter!

I mentioned that my sisters and I are working out.

Anyone who might be tempted to become intimidated by my modest workout routine may observe my highly sophisticated equipment selection as a reminder that I do not consider myself a workout-y person. (That is a kid-sized soccer ball, currently and very stylishly serving my compression-exercise needs. The towel is another advanced workout instrument, frequently referred to by insiders as a “rolled-up towel.”)

But I do want to share about this particular routine, as we have received a review subscription to a program that we think might be of benefit to our readers. I’m going to write about it in detail when I’ve completed it, but for now I’ll just let you know that it’s out there, in case you (like me a little over a month ago) don’t know that it exists.

The program is designed specifically for post-partum women. It targets diastasis recti and core and pelvic floor issues, but can also be for post-partum weight loss. I was looking for solutions for my diastasis recti condition after this second pregnancy and found this program that, frankly, seems a lot more realistic and holistic than any other approach I’ve come upon.

It’s called the Mutu System. It’s a “system” because it provides instructions not only for specific exercises, but also for daily habits and eating that, all together, address the core-related problems that moms suffer. Rosie, Suki, and I are doing it and are pretty much keeping up with each other, although not perfectly in sync. I’m currently in Week 4 of twelve weeks. I can tell you that, so far, I am feeling stronger, more energetic, and I think I can sense my diastasis resolving somewhat, although I know not to expect immediate results on that front.

(Full disclosure: this is not an affiliate link. I will wait until we’re done with the program to give you my full review and tell you if I think it’s worth your money! At that time I may use an affiliate link, but only if we decide it’s a worthwhile product. We want you assure you that we are not selling out, and that we value your trust!)

Right off the bat, though, if you’re interested in this topic, I can recommend the site through which I learned about MuTu: Diastasis Rectified. This post (and others on her blog) continues to be a helpful resource to me as I try to heal my core and keep my body in good health and shape for child-bearing.

Other links this week!

I know that my mom provided some reading on Justice Scalia last week, but I do have some more.

Father Schall writes about not the man, but the man’s funeral service: A Reminder of What Life is Really About. Reading this makes me strongly wish that I had been there!


He references the homily by our dear Father Scalia, which you should take some time (15 min) to watch:

 

Other:

Also from Catholic World Report, a clarifying piece about a confusing topic: Contraception, Congo Nuns, Choosing the Lesser Evil, and Conflict of Commandments.


Also related to religious sisters: an introduction to Blessed Julia Rodzińska, the “Angel of Stutthof Concentration Camp.“


A quick item for women to pass on to their menfolk: How to Bless your Children.


As recommended in The Little Oratory, praying the Liturgy of the House in “the King’s English” will be a wonderful formation of beauty in the home, as well, of course, as joining the family in worship. David Clayton explains this new volume and what it might mean for families who want to pray together — The Anglican Ordinariate Divine Office – A Wonderful Gift for Lay People and Hope for the Transformation of Western Culture. As David mentions in the post, you can buy the book from Book Depository –– cheaper than Amazon and free shipping!

 

Liturgical Year:

Today is the feast of St. Gabriel of Our Lady of Sorrows, patron of young people and religious novices!

 

~We’d like to be clear that, when we direct you to a site via one of our links, we’re not necessarily endorsing the whole site, but rather just referring you to the individual post in question (unless we state otherwise).~


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Auntie Leila’s Pinterest.
Rosie’s Pinterest.
Sukie’s Pinterest.
Deirdre’s Pinterest.
Habou’s Pinterest.
Bridget’s Pinterest.
Habou’s Blog: Corner Art Studio.
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Style and Symbol ~ The Spirit of the Liturgy: A Lenten Book Club

 

{Lenten Book Club: The Spirit of the Liturgy}

As promised — and I do believe, in keeping with the mission of this blog, which is to talk about what we want to talk about —  we will read The Spirit(s) of the Liturgy as a little book club together this Lent. I will post here exactly as I would talk to you about it if we were together. Please add your questions and comments!

First, Romano Guardini’s The Spirit of the Liturgy. It’s free, online. You can also purchase it here, although be warned, this edition does not have the footnotes, which stinks.
Then, Joseph Ratzinger:  The Spirit of the Liturgy (yes, same name).
(When you buy something via our Amazon affiliate link, a little cash rolls our way… just a little. Thanks!)
I’ll post on Fridays. I’ll give you your homework, I’ll talk about what we read, we’ll discuss in the comments. You can do this study at any point, but if you want to stay current and join in the convo, that’s how it will go.

*************

Previously: 

The Introduction: Escaping Preference

Chapter One: Seeking Universal Prayer

Chapter Two: Fellowship

Homework: Read Chapter Five for next Friday

 

Chapters Three and Four, The Spirit of the Liturgy, Romano Guardini

Chapter Three: The Style of the Liturgy

Since these chapters take the form more of essays on the topic than of one unified development of a thesis, it’s not surprising that in Chapter Three, Guardini returns to his main theme: that of universality. The Liturgy must have room in it for every person, while bringing each person to its own, lofty level — which is to say, into heaven itself, for that is where we are when we worship at the Mass! But I get ahead of myself…

He is not speaking of what we would call style, which I think is more like genre or even era, as in Victorian style, or vintage style. He calls its style the way the Church goes about formalizing the creativity that one brings to the Liturgy.

And creative we must be, by our nature. Each place, each sacred artist, each gathering of holy (and not so holy) people ends up expressing what they mean by their worship in material form. The challenge is to make the expression worthy. In a good footnote, Guardini says,

The essence of genius, of the man of genius (e.g., of the Saint), and of the really great work or deed consists in this, that it is immeasurably original and yet is still universally applicable to human life.

It’s of course boundlessly amusing that he begins the chapter with a rather difficult exposition, and then abruptly states —

It is unnecessary to waste further words on the subject.

I for one raise a skeptical eyebrow: “Hmm… maybe you could say more, actually” — but let’s plow on.

To make his point about style in the liturgy, he contrasts these pairs:

Temple of Paestum; Cathedral of Notre Dame at Reims

 

Crucifixion by Giotto; Crucifixion by Grunewald

 

 

Statue of Khafre; Donatello’s St. John the Evangelist

 

He says that each work on the right here expresses style (in the “narrow sense” he is using it) to a greater degree:

The particular is to a great degree absorbed by the universal and ideal. In such works an involved mental or spiritual condition, for instance, which could only have expressed itself in an abstruse utterance or in an unreproducible action, is simplified and reduced to its elements…

The figure which appears but once [in time] is made to personify characteristics common to the whole of society. The hasty, impetuous movement is restrained and measured.

And I think here we can see that he is speaking of something being “stylized” — or formalized — rather than of it having a particular what we would call “style.” I don’t think he is saying he likes one more than the other, mind you, but rather trying to get across what he means by this universal character. What do you think?

More on this later when we discuss sacred art and music with Ratzinger.

For now, consider:

[Modern man] wants to find in prayer — particularly if he is of an independent turn of mind — the direct expression of his spiritual condition. Yet in the liturgy he is expected to accept, as the mouthpiece of his inner life, a system of ideas, prayer and action, which is too highly generalized, and, as it were, unsuited to him. It strikes him as being formal and almost meaningless.

The passage that begins:

Those who honestly want to come to grips with this problem in all its bearings should for their own guidance note the way in which the figure of Christ is represented, first in the liturgy, and then in the Gospels.

… needs to be read carefully. For us, a hundred years later, it’s a masterful summation of how the Liturgy offers us the whole Christ — the Christ of the Gospels and He of eternity. Guardini knows our longing:

More than one would be willing to sacrifice the most beautiful liturgical prayer, if in

exchange he might meet Christ face to face and speak to Him from the bottom of his heart.

He explains that anything other than the liturgy — corporate, divine worship — is a man-made “system of prayer” —

… based upon one particular set of hypotheses or requirements, would undoubtedly prove a totally unsuitable form for a content of different origin. Only a system of life and thought which is truly Catholic — that is to say, actual and universal — is capable of being universally adopted, without violence to the individual…

If private devotion were non-existent, and if the liturgy were the final and exclusive form of spiritual exercise, that exercise might easily degenerate into a frigid formula; but if the liturgy were non-existent — well, our daily observations amply show what would be the consequences, and how fatally they would take effect.

Chapter Four, The Symbolism of the Liturgy

The problem of the body/soul relationship is in many ways the central tension of our life as fallen creatures. The Incarnation is the answer, but keeping a hold on it will never fail to be our challenge.

Guardini asks questions:

God is Simplicity; then how is He concerned with specific ritual, actions and instruments?

God is a Spirit–can matter therefore have any significance in the soul’s intercourse with Him?

Should it not be the task of all true religion to come to be the “worship of God in spirit and in truth,” and at least to aim at, if not to succeed in, eliminating the bodily and material element as far as possible? This question penetrates deeply into the essence and nature of the liturgy.

In this perennial divide, Guardini outlines two types: The ones who seek to spiritualize worship and reduce it to the “simple word as the most spiritual medium of communication,” and the ones who interpret everything spiritual in terms of the material to the point that they see “every material action as a spiritual experience.” 

To give you my own interpretation of these two types: think of those who want the sanctuary to be nothing more than a table and a podium, who offer only calligraphy as sacred art, and who like simple felt banners; then think of those who wish to bring in rocks and plants and water into the sanctuary, who continually think of new images to explain sacred thoughts to children, and who want to decorate for every season, including Lent. And, ironically, who also love simple felt banners! Maybe you yourself fall into one of these categories! It’s good to try to understand, then, what a liturgical symbol is and why we would need it.

Guardini: “Both — the sense of cohesion [that the “spiritual” type of person lacks] and the power of discrimination [lacked by the one oriented to matter, Nature, and feeling] — are essential to the creation of a symbol.”

Embedded in his discussion, without explicit statement, is the idea that certain symbols and gestures must develop over time and be respected for that reason (this thought is brought out by Ratzinger). So although he is discussion “creation of symbols” in the present tense, I think he’s musing on how it all came about, and wants us to accept, by means of our submission to the Liturgy, the symbols that tradition has given us — that have been created and passed down, not rejecting them out of either a disdain for matter or an eager and fecund affinity for it.

The people who really live by the liturgy will come to learn that the bodily movements, the actions, and the material objects which it employs are all of the highest significance. It offers great opportunities of expression, of knowledge, and of spiritual experience; it is emancipating in its action, and capable of presenting a truth far more strongly and convincingly than can the mere word of mouth.

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{pretty, happy, funny, real}

What is this {pretty, happy, funny, real} you speak of?

~ {pretty, happy, funny, real} ~

Capturing the context of contentment in everyday life ~

Every Thursday, here at Like Mother, Like Daughter!

I keep waiting for winter to show up, but maybe we’re just going to skip ahead to spring, I don’t know. I mean, it makes sense for spring to be on its way, but I just don’t feel like we’ve put in our winter dues yet. Aside from a few ice storms, it’s been awfully mild.

We all went on our nature walk Saturday morning, and even early in the day, we were hot and sweaty by the time we were done. Not quite what you’d expect in the middle of February.

And don’t get me wrong — it was lovely.

(Aren’t those hawks awesome?)

The downside to all this mild weather is that the dreaded bugs are returning. Mosquitoes, spiders… scorpions. Sigh. I would gladly accept some seasonally appropriate weather in exchange for a few more months (weeks, even?) of dead bugs.

Sorry to be just talking about the weather. I’m not trying to brag (this is our pleasant season, remember? Summer is so hot…) or complain (except about the scorpion in my kitchen. I make NO APOLOGIES for complaining about that), or even simply to bore you to tears. These things sometimes just happen.

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Knitting a little.

I started this cap and sweater last year, as Rosie and Deirdre were on the home stretch, waiting for their babies. I had made a cap for Nora (knowing that Rosie was having a girl), and then this pink cap (just because this was the yarn in my stash) in case Deirdre had a girl also.

I was even inspired to go ahead and make a sweater as well. It’s not incentivizing to make a sweater for a baby who lives in temps hovering around 100° for months after she’s born, but just maybe a New Hampshire baby would need one, eh?

However, the baby was a boy, and I just… stopped. I stopped one inch from the end of the second sleeve of this sweater. Yep, that’s how I roll.

 

I tend to keep things that are in process (even yarn that I’m queuing up) in this basket (the deep stash is in my pantry/craft room). So after Christmas, when I was trying to figure out what was lurking in here,  I found the sweater.

And… just finished it, sheesh.

 

(The sleeves are the same –it’s just a trick of the way it’s lying on the blanket that makes them look different. The blanket was made by my grandmother. She used one of those little pot-holder weaving things, I think, and just made this cheerful blanket!)

A couple of notes:

You can find the info on my Ravelry page.


I had one skein of sock yarn and that is why the sweater is a bit shorter than I would like. But — I didn’t run out of yarn! Go me!


And there isn’t a button at the neck for two reasons: 1. Babies’ necks are so lacking in room to maneuver that I think buttons there tend to be too fussy and possibly uncomfy for them and 2. I forgot to put in a buttonhole.

I gave it to a dear friend who did just have a baby girl, baby Ciara!

 

 

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{bits & pieces}

The weekly “little of this, little of that” feature here at Like Mother, Like Daughter!

 

 

Justice Antonin Scalia, great jurist, RIP.

Especially for fathers to read, because we all need role models: Christopher Scalia on “My Father.”


A good piece on some “key learnings” from Justice Scalia’s full life. Do read the embedded interview in full — most edifying.

And from around and about:

“Lost Lenten plans” — they happen to all of us, as my friend Bo Bonner writes in this essay about how We are Always in the Middle, Beginning.


Another one for Dad, and maybe older kids: How to Develop the Situational Awareness of Jason Bourne from The Art of Manliness blog. Suki’s comment: “This post gets into specifics about dangerous situations. I think Situational Awareness is also super important for being a good conversationalist — and just a good member of society.” We need to start thinking about this so that we can teach our children, little by little, to look around them and see what’s going on, and what others need.


We need you to look at this bridal bouquet that features an antler… and feathers. It weighed 10 lbs, apparently. And also, note to self, get some fabulous taxidermy for the centerpieces. Rosie: “Who doesn’t have a fox on her wedding banquet table?!?” Deirdre, call your office.


I believe it: Antidepressant Microbes In Soil: How Dirt Makes You Happy. If you haven’t gardened because you are a little stand-offish or don’t know what to do, it’s hard to imagine how good you feel after you mess around in the dirt, planting things. That there are literally physical things that go up your hands and into your body, finding their way to your brain, just makes so much sense to me, now that I read about it!


Also: need to find some guys to sit around singing like this at my table: Irish song in 7 parts (I didn’t count them, taking it on faith alone).


Hildegard of Bingen has been rediscovered, and with her, many medieval treasures. I haven’t watched the videos on this page, but there is so much information here about her. What an amazing person!


Our friend Kevin from St. Gregory the Great Parish* sent me this article about some specific habits of friendship, which the author calls a “kibbutz.” It’s like our idea of the St. Greg’s Pocket, but, I’m going to say, ours will take you further (right into friendships for your children)! But I like the practical ideas here and they will definitely work in your Pocket. Just remember my tips too; follow the links.

*Will you be there at St. Gregory’s on Monday? I hope to see you at the reception after the Solemn High Mass!

 

From the archives: Five answers from Auntie Therese that will instantly calm you down.

 

~We’d like to be clear that, when we direct you to a site via one of our links, we’re not necessarily endorsing the whole site, but rather just referring you to the individual post in question (unless we state otherwise).~

Follow us on Twitter.
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Auntie Leila’s Pinterest.
Rosie’s Pinterest.
Sukie’s Pinterest.
Deirdre’s Pinterest.
Habou’s Pinterest.
Bridget’s Pinterest.
Habou’s Blog: Corner Art Studio.
Auntie Leila’s Ravelry.
Auntie Leila’s Instagram.
Rosie’s Instagram.
Sukie’s Instagram.
Bridget’s Instagram. (Bridget is posting from Rome now, so go ahead and request a follow!)

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Fellowship ~ The Spirit of the Liturgy: A Lenten Book Club

{Lenten Book Club: The Spirit of the Liturgy}

As promised — and I do believe, in keeping with the mission of this blog, which is to talk about what we want to talk about —  we will read The Spirit(s) of the Liturgy as a little book club together this Lent. I will post here exactly as I would talk to you about it if we were together. Please add your questions and comments!

First, Romano Guardini’s The Spirit of the Liturgy. It’s free, online. You can also purchase it here, although be warned, this edition does not have the footnotes, which stinks.
Then, Joseph Ratzinger:  The Spirit of the Liturgy (yes, same name).
(When you buy something via our Amazon affiliate link, a little cash rolls our way… just a little. Thanks!)
I’ll post on Fridays. I’ll give you your homework, I’ll talk about what we read, we’ll discuss in the comments. You can do this study at any point, but if you want to stay current and join in the convo, that’s how it will go.

*************

Previously: 

The Introduction: Escaping Preference

Chapter One: Seeking Universal Prayer

Homework: Read Chapters Three and Four for next Friday (the subjects are dealt with more at length in Ratzinger’s book and we need to get to the end of the book in time! Not that we will be done by the end of Lent, but you knew that, based on Like Mother Like Daughter.

A tidy (ish) desk with your {pretty, happy, funny, real}

What is this {pretty, happy, funny, real} you speak of?

~ {pretty, happy, funny, real} ~

Capturing the context of contentment in everyday life ~

Every Thursday, here at Like Mother, Like Daughter!

Where to start, where to start.

First — a quick note. You know that I love the Ordinariate. I’ve been telling you about St. Gregory the Great and how coming up on Monday they will have a big Mass to celebrate the Feast of the Chair of St. Peter and the anniversary of the erection of the Ordinariate (click on the links to know what those things are). The Mass is at 7:30 p.m. here (near Boston).

I will be there and I will be so happy to meet up with you afterwards — do come say hi! I know that it’s hard to go to an evening Mass on a weeknight, I know the kids need to go to bed, I know that it’s a long shot — but if you are anywhere nearby, do come! If you are someone who’s wondering if the Catholic Church is for you, come! Anglican, Episcopalian, any sort of Protestant, or anything else. I will be in the “Our Lady of Providence Hall” where there will be a reception after the Mass. It will be easy to find me. I’ll be there to encourage young families to come see how beautiful this worship is.

I finished my wrist warmers the other day. The pattern is called “Onion Market” which I think is brilliant. How do people come up with these names? I would have called it “Round Lacy Thingies” or something.

If you are very knitting-savvy, you will note that I made some mistakes in between some of the round lacy thingies, but don’t worry, I carefully replicated them on the other mitt so we’re good.

If these look heavy to you, you are looking at them all wrong. They are light and fluffy — warm alpaca yarn of cloud-like softness making my wrists and the tops of my hands happy.

My notes are on my Ravelry page.

And now I am working on a shawl. It’s also there on Ravelry, so take a peek. It’s going to be like this shawl I made Habou, called Holden.

The other day Deirdre posted about her planner and how having a tidy desk and staying off of the internet until she has a plan are the benefit and secret, respectively, of her new regime for starting the year off right (and note that it’s mid-February and we’re still “starting the year off right” and probably will continue to do so right up until Thanksgiving).

Besides a tidy desk, she’s finding room for creativity and recreation, which is so good. I’ve written about how important that is here. And here.

But right now, let’s focus on the tidy desk idea!

Mine is a work in progress.

The desk is {pretty}, if shabby. The cords are {real}.

My plan (not going to happen, most likely) would be to put some fabric around my desk. Or maybe wait for all these things to become wireless?

The piles of envelopes are {funny (and real)} — on that little table is some wedding detritus of some daughters who will remain anonymous lest you judge their tidy desks by my untidy work area that is all their fault. I’m trying to move the things on out. They’ve made it from the corner to the table. We’ll track their progress carefully…

 

I moved out all the books in this bookcase, as I told you before, and have been bringing in my books that I consult often or are just not of general interest to the rest of the household — but if they turn out to be, they are right here!

But I haven’t organized them yet. They are just there, all random-like.

And I made more room for my cards, papers, and bills. Deirdre had said that her upright paper organizer was ending up as a vertical “stack” (until she deployed another system and some clothespins, smart!). Mine was similar. Just another place for papers to go and die. But I cleaned it out and at least the first slot really is “live bills,” even if the rest of it is somewhat backwater-ish. See my post-its back there? Handy.

The super beat-up stool under the desk is for me to rest my feet on when I’ve had it with sitting up at my desk. I tried a different desk chair and it was terrible. I’m not designed for sitting upright in chairs, really. I think I need a desk… hammock.

 

How about showing us your desk, tidy or otherwise? We’d love to see! Or anything, really!

 

 

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How I’m Using my Daily Planner to Make Time for the Things I Love

Trying to start out this year fresh, I knew that if I could get a hold of my desk and keep it squeaky clean and clutter-free at all times, organization for the rest of my life would flow from that.

I also knew that I wanted to try out using a daily planner for the first time, to see if that could also help me towards my organizational goals. What I didn’t predict was how the daily planner scheme and the desk scheme would work together to help me find time for the things I love.

I have also implemented one key secret while using my daily planner and approaching my desk that has freed up my time in a very liberating way.

 

By the way, A few weeks ago, dear reader Janet commented to the effect that she hoped I wouldn’t cover my daily planner with a brown bag. (As I mentioned, my dear little one got at the original cover with a pen, pretty effectively ruining its appeal.) Although I loved your suggestions, Janet, I have to admit that I took it as a “challenge accepted” moment.

The thing about a brown bag cover is that it’s so low-commitment! Also free. I just slapped it on, took out the marker and the acrylic paints, and went for it. If I did something I didn’t like, who cares? It’s just a brown bag!

On the other hand, if I did end up liking it, it would make me happy for the rest of the year, as I’d be using it on a daily basis (that is the idea, after all).

I do like it.

I liked it enough to get out my gilding paint and add a few golden details. The original cover had gold on teal (same teal as the other journal, below), which was lovely. But The Artist and I agree that we like this more.

So thanks for the creative push, Finnabee!

Anyway:

I just thought I’d share a little more about how I’m using it, because the topic came up (here and on our Facebook page) about how to manage to find more time for the things we love but don’t usually have time for – in my case, pysanky and other art and crafts.

This planner, and the method I’ve figured out with it, has been helping me find that time. It is, of course, only February… but I’m banking on the idea that sharing about this here will help keep me accountable for the rest of the year!

First off, I have to laugh at myself because I am using sticky notes after all, even though I protested a mere couple of weeks ago that I didn’t want to do the sticky-note method my mother talked about.

I have been adding stickies for two things:

1) for my grocery shopping list, because I use this planner for my meal planning as well as all other plans-planning. I sit down with it at the beginning of the week to think through my meal plan, and have a sticky inside where I write down needed groceries. I can carry it around with me, inside the planner, for a day or two while I mull it over, then pull it out when I’m ready to head to the store. I like to think through my grocery list in the context of the whole week’s plans. (My mom has a post detailing this method here.)

Here’s an example of me getting my week’s plan started and my grocery list started at the same time:

 

2) I’m using one sticky a week, currently, for the workout plan that Rosie, Suki and I have started (more on that later). Long story short, there’s a new set of workouts/goals for each week, and I needed a cheat sheet to remember what I’m supposed to do every day this week without having to look it up online each time.

Next week, I’ll turn the page and put in a new sticky for the workouts for that week.

 

Here’s how, specifically, I’m using the planner in a way that I think helps me make more time for getting to my artwork. I’m going to share my “secret” to what is making this whole planner thing really revolutionize my days.

I wrote up a fake (but plausible!) day (in the outdated space for December 22, 2015) to show you:

Here it is, broken down into the “zones” I use:

 

Zone 1: The obvious daily-planner-type-items. These are things that will be done with the kids or with the kids in tow. I try to keep it short as per my mom’s advice.

Zone 2: My plan for dinner, which I have put down at the beginning of the week. At the beginning of the day, I need to look up at that and make sure I remember what I’m planning on and take the steps to prep for that.

Zone 3: And this is my “secret” — My “online” zone. It’s the list of things that I will most likely do while they kids are napping/having quiet time or before they’re awake, because I prefer not to be on the computer while they’re around.

For me this is a breakthrough, because I have limited time online and even less time at the keyboard — and yet, it is the easiest time for me to waste! So often I’ll approach the computer thinking vaguely of the pressing agenda items, and then proceed to browse and scroll and click and read… and find myself at the end of an hour, the kids waking up, and having failed to write that certain email or check that certain site.

You know that feeling? Frustrating!

Later, I end up back online doing the same thing, still trying to get to those items. I would rather be drawing or painting or what have you, but I am instead reflexively scrolling down my newsfeed. Why?

So this is my solution: I have an online to-do list (on some days, just an “at-desk” or “on-computer” to-do list), there as part of my daily planner plan. Before I let myself browse or whatnot, I make sure I can cross those things off.

Then, if they’re crossed off, I feel more liberated to just get up and move away from the screen and on to more important and/or more rewarding uses of my time.

Zone 4: End of day prep. This is the zone where I write down the things I need to do in the evening in order to prepare well for the following day, particularly in the food department. You can see how it spills down into…

Zone 5 (to prep for zone 2): The meal plan for the next day. It all revolves around the food, n’est-ce pas?

Mainly, I find that using the planner is helping me to grant myself the times that I want to use for art, because I feel confident that I have indeed attended to the needs of my family and that taking time for recreation and/or creativity is appropriate.

Maybe sometimes we don’t allow ourselves the recreation because we think we’re too busy for it or there are more important things, but that doesn’t necessarily mean that we do those more important things instead. All too easily, for me, what I do instead is some non-essential activity online. At least for me, it helps to be very diligent about organizing this way, so that I can prioritize the first things and then know that I’ve crossed them off.

How does this connect to my desk?

I have also finally nailed down a filing system that makes sense for me in order to keep my desk clear. This took me quite some time.

I knew that I needed to move from a horizontal inbox (which just turns into a slightly-contained-stack-of-papers-and-things-disappearing-under-each-other) to some kind of upright system where I could see what is where. (I’m very visual, in case you hadn’t noticed.) So I got these letter stands and used them for a while. But they weren’t quite cutting it, because I couldn’t keep track of which slot was for what, so I was really just storing things in the stands and then allowing other piles to happen on the surface of the desk.

But really, the system needs to be one where no paper hits the desk to sit there — every paper that comes towards the desk immediately gets filed into its proper slot. Every item of mail gets opened immediately and, once read, put in its place.

Hence the ever so classy and elegant clothespin markers. If you have a better idea for me, hit me up. But as of now I am quite content! They do the job: I know what’s what and if an item doesn’t fit into one of these categories, it doesn’t stay in the desk area at all.

 

Every Friday, the top item in my Zone 3 (at desk/computer/online) is to go through my letter stands and take care of each slot. The things that need to be filed get filed away into my filing bin or letter boxes; I take a look at the “Action” items and see to those; I pay the bills that are in the “Pay” section, etc. If I am good with this system, I head into every weekend with a cleared desk — and clear head — ready to start out the next week fresh.

In summary, this is how I use my planner, by day:

Sunday evening/Monday morning:

Go through whole week and plan out meals for each day. Write down in Zone 2.

Write down any engagements down in Zone 1.

Each evening:

Look at next day’s entry.

Write down chores or other items that come to mind to do in Zone 1. Write down at-desk/online items in Zone 3.

Each morning:

Look at that day’s entry.

Update to-do list (Zone 1) and at-desk/online list (Zone 3).

Each Friday:

Go through desk papers.

All days: cross off all items and then take advantage of some leisure time to make something beautiful!

 

I hope this was helpful to you! So far it’s working for me – here’s hoping I can keep it up…!

The post How I’m Using my Daily Planner to Make Time for the Things I Love appeared first on Like Mother Like Daughter.