Rob Bell's Blog, page 17
March 15, 2018
Why The Mental Game of Golf is NOT Successful
Why The Mental Game of Golf is NOT Successful
I entered a golf tournament last year. I do it because I compete in everything I do.
I was playing pretty well for me heading into the tournament. I committed to lessons, and didn’t have to rely on my athleticism to find a way to make par. I shot 77 the week before, but I was finally striking the ball well for once in my life.
It was pretty solid. I was excited to play.
My short game is my strength and I’m a fantastic putter. If I manage to keep the ball in front of me, then I can play okay.
Well, the second hole of the tourney, I hit it high right. And high right again on holes four and five. I made the turn at plus 2 and hit it high right on 10 & 11, bogey and double-bogey.
I was struggling.
In running, it’s called bonking. In golf, it’s called limping in. Awful feeling.
Not much changed during the second day of the tournament.
Champions can adjust. I could not.
Where did the mental game of golf come into play?
It was secondary. It was not important.
The mental game was not a focus because of how bad I was hitting the ball.
How could I focus on having fun, staying in the moment, playing it one shot at a time, and letting it go, when I was striking the ball so poorly?
That is why the mental game does NOT work!
The mental game of golf can NOT be secondary!
When the mental game fails, it’s because of this reason. It was secondary.
We approach the mental game and mental toughness as an ancillary benefit. We treat it like a stocking stuffer instead of a gift under the tree.
We treat it like a stocking stuffer instead of a gift under the tree.
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We all act like the mental game of golf is a nap we take when tired instead of the number of hours we actually need to sleep.
We do not hold the mental game as a primary goal and that’s why it fails.
We try to make deals with our mental game and we do not focus on it.
We treat it as an if/then statement. For example, IF I’m playing okay, THEN I’ll move on and focus on the next shot.
Let’s say, we had a simple goal of 1) committing to the shot. That’s it! One goal.
That’s fantastic, but then we plugged in the bunker on a hole and sailed the green on the next. We committed to the shot, and it didn’t work, so then, we bagged it! We focused on hitting it better, which means tons of different things, and we floated into the abyss of results thinking.
We got away from our goal of 1) committing to the shot.
It was a stocking stuffer. We didn’t value it enough to put it under the tree.
The only way the mental game of golf works is if it is the PRIMARY Goal.
If the ONLY goal was to commit to the shot, even when we hit it bad, we committed to the goal and what that process looked like for us. It’s not easy of course, but it allowed us to compete and stay focused. We can accept those results.
Now, here’s the rub: IF we committed to our goal, IF we stayed with it and did not stray, then we know we gave ourselves the best chance for success. Plus, our mental game goal is 100% in our control. It’s part of the process, independent of results.
Players and coaches, we must remember that we are in the process business, NOT the results business.
We are in the process business, NOT the results business.
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Let’s say we set a goal to “have fun.” It’s our goal because we know if we can simply focus on that, then we usually play better and do not get stuck inside of our own head. If our ONLY goal is to have fun and enjoy it, then it is 100% in our control. We can do that! However, If “have fun” is just an ancillary benefit or a secondary goal, then once we start to not play well, we bag it. POOF!
The mental game becomes an If/Then statement.
IF I play well, THEN I’ll have fun. Sorry, that doesn’t work. That’s making deals with ourselves, not goals.
That’s what I see and hear from players and sadly, experience it myself.
The mental game is the same across all other sports. If it isn’t held up as the standard and the only goal, then it is dependent upon results and outcome.
Dr. Rob Bell is a Sport Psychology Coach. His company DRB & associates is based in Indianapolis. Some clients have included: Indy Eleven, University of Notre Dame, Marriott, and Walgreens. Check out all the books on Mental Toughness
March 9, 2018
(INFOGRAPHIC) 8 Deadly Ways to Build Persistence
(INFOGRAPHIC) 8 Deadly Ways to Build Persistence
Every morning, I tweet out the same phase:
Patience & Persistence…
It’s a mantra. A belief system.
Persistence, Mental Toughness, and Grit are all muscles. We can build persistence and we can build patience.
Theses skills are muscles that we build like creativity, speed, and strength. You increase the perseverance muscle by exercising the very traits detailed within this infographic.
The simple reason why this title has “deadly” in it, is that in order to build persistence, we must fail, fail, and fail some more. Losing and failure sure feels deadly, but just remember failure is NOT fatal.
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Dr. Rob Bell is a Sport Psychology Coach. His company DRB & associates is based in Indianapolis. Some clients have included: Indy Eleven, University of Notre Dame, Marriott, and Walgreens. Check out all the books on Mental Toughness
March 2, 2018
What I Learned Speaking to the NFL Strength Coaches
What I Learned Speaking to the NFL Strength Coaches
I delivered the keynote to the NFL Strength Coaches banquet this week to basically kick off the NFL scouting combine.
It was really cool. I love coaches and it was humbling to have these giants talk with me about their own Hinge moments and mental toughness.
It was a fantastic dinner, listening to great stories, and just meeting such inspiring coaches.
They gave the awards after the dinner and Jerry Palmieri received the lifetime achievement award. He wonderfully represents the NFL strength coaches. He just retired from the Giants and has been in strength coaching since 1983.
He gave an excellent speech and talked about the three things he learned from coaching. It was after he mentioned all of his mentors and proteges in the room that it dawned on me.
This guy has personally coached thousands of athletes and mentored hundreds of other strength coaches. You can safely estimate that the guys he deeply impacted and directly changed their lives just because of his coaching is generational.
Then, from the people he directed impacted to the many numbers of people that they themselves impacted gets pretty mind boggling.
When I looked around the room at the head NFL strength coaches and the assistant NFL strength coaches, the sheer number of people and families influenced, changed, and impacted in some fashion from the coaches in that room was easily in the millions! MILLIONS.
Coaches truly are the most important hinge in people’s lives.
The best part is that everyone is a coach!
You can’t know the number of people that you impact, but you do make a difference.
The world is different because that you are in it. If we focus on making it better and impacting people, our lives change as well.
Thanks to all the people who started the 30 Days to Mental Toughness Challenge. Excited that you’re taking part and creating a better YOU and US. Sorry, if you missed out on this round. Next month begins another challenge.
Dr. Rob Bell is a Sport Psychology Coach. His company DRB & associates is based in Indianapolis. Some clients have included: Indy Eleven, University of Notre Dame, Marriott, and Walgreens. Check out all the books on Mental Toughness
February 13, 2018
How Did The Miracle on Snow Happen?
How Did The Miracle on Snow Happen?
Simen Hegstad Krueger, a Norweign, was in his first ever Olympic race. In the opening 150 meters of the 30k cross-country event, he crashed, other racers piled on top of him, and he even broke his pole. His immediate first thought after the crash was “It was over.” He was in last place out of 68 of the other top athletes in the world. Then, the miracle on snow happened!
https://www.nbcolympics.com/video/miracle-snow-relive-kruegers-epic-gold-performance
He fought back and ended up winning the Gold Medal by over 20 seconds! How does this miracle even happen?
Could it be that the crash actually helped him?
Before and during performances, our arousal levels naturally rise. We want to do well so there is a ton more energy and anticipation before important competitions. There is a tendency to have expectations before competitions as well.
Expectations are not always a good thing. Confidence is good of course, but expectations have to do with the outcome and the results are out of our control.
Confidence is good of course, but expectations have to do with the outcome and the results are out…
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So, when a situation like a crash occurs, it forces a major shift in attention and the expectations are literally removed. His first thought after the crash was “It was over.” So, all he could do, is simply race. No thoughts on tactics or strategy, just execute his technique and go.
The Miracle on Snow has been experienced by many other athletes that have expectations removed.
In 2002 at the Tampa Bay Classic, K. J. Choi had been suffering from terrible stomach pains. Many saw him grabbing his abdomen during the final round. He later stated that the pain made him say to himself, “I’ll just take it hole by hole.” He won the tournament by an amazing seven shots and had his appendix removed the next day.
In 1995, Ben Crenshaw won the Masters. What’s remarkable about this achievement is that he arrived at the tournament with his game in shambles, barely making cuts, and the Sunday prior, he had lost his teacher and friend, Harvey Penick. He flew back to Austin for the funeral on Wednesday evening, the night before the tournament. “I don’t know how I got through it,” Crenshaw replied. “I still don’t.”
Padraig Harrington hurt his wrist so badly prior to playing the 2008 Open Championship, that he only gave himself a 50 percent chance of actually finishing the tournament. In fact, he remarked that if he had not been defending his title, he probably would not have played. “It was a great distraction for me,” Harrington said. “It took a lot of pressure off me. It took a lot of stress off me. The fact that I didn’t play three practice rounds like normal for a major was a big bonus. I was very fresh going into the weekend, and [these] thirty-six holes was a real battle.”
All of these competitors basically had their own miracle on snow moment and were able to accomplish greatness in spite of their circumstances because they had no expectations on the outcome.
Having no expectations in turn forced them to focus only on what was in front of them. They got out of their own way!
It’s the same for us as well, when we get out of our own way, by focusing just on the next play, this moment, we all perform better. No expectations!
It’s not known “what-if” he didn’t crash, would he have still won the Gold medal? Well, we don’t know because “what-if” never happened, he did crash, and he won.
Dr. Rob Bell is a Sport Psychology Coach. His company DRB & associates is based in Indianapolis. Some clients have included: Indy Eleven, University of Notre Dame, Marriott, and Walgreens. Check out all the books on Mental Toughness
February 9, 2018
7 Helpful Ways To “Act As If” Toward Mental Toughness
[Infographic] 7 Helpful Ways to “Act As if” Toward Mental Toughness
I absolutely can’t stand the saying ” fake it until you make it.” Why do you want to fake anything in life on purpose, especially to yourself?
We already fake enough. We have social media profiles of our happy faces. We posture and become in the business not of being real, but of image management. So, don’t fake it.
Instead, simply ACT AS IF.
Instead, simply ACT AS IF.
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The difference is that we can act our way into right thinking easier than trying to think our way into right acting. Here is a fun infographic for you to follow to build your mental toughness by “acting as if.”
Dr. Rob Bell is a Sport Psychology Coach. His company DRB & associates is based in Indianapolis. Some clients have included: Indy Eleven, University of Notre Dame, Marriott, and Walgreens. Check out all the books on Mental Toughness
January 5, 2018
5 Ways To CRUSH Someone’s Confidence (Do This INSTEAD)
5 Ways To CRUSH Someone’s Confidence (Do This INSTEAD)
This infographic was designed specifically for parents, because I hate it when I accidentally crush my own kids confidence. But below is good advice if you’re a coach as well. Unfortunately, if you are a Lex Luther type of person who just wants to crush someone’s confidence, then do some work on yourself.
I totally remember my senior year of baseball when I made an error at short-stop. It was a hard hit ground ball that simply jumped and hit me in the chest and I didn’t make the play. I wasn’t that upset about it because it was a bad hop. But, when I got back to the dugout and coach called everyone together, he verbally challenged me if I could even play that position.
“Um, yes sir.”
Now, I was never a great hitter, but I worked tons on fielding and felt I was a great short-stop. But that feedback from coach, in front of everyone, made me question everything and wonder if I really could play that position. yeah, call out someone in front of their peers, that’ll crush someone’s confidence.
That experience and feedback stayed with me and frankly, I played like crap the entire year at shortstop.
I don’t blame coach, I just didn’t have the tools. I didn’t have mental toughness. I didn’t know how to let go of mistakes.
It sucked and I wish I could go back and give that high-school kid some advice.
It is easier to crush someone’s confidence than it is to build it up. Confidence is contagious…
It’s easier to crush confidence than it is to build it.
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Perhaps this infographic can help.
Dr. Rob Bell is a Sport Psychology Coach. His company DRB & associates is based in Indianapolis. Some clients have included: Indy Eleven, University of Notre Dame, Marriott, and Walgreens. Check out all the books on Mental Toughness
December 29, 2017
In 2018, Do This Growth Technique Instead Of Goals…
In 2018, Do This Technique Instead Of Goals…
If you’ve followed me for an extended period of time, (and chances are you’ve haven’t), then you’ll have come across my disdain for goals. I’m not against setting goals of course, they are effective! It’s just that goals get perverted into only outcome based objectives, so instead of goals, we need to do this growth technique.
In fact, here are some of my previous posts on goals.
Three reasons why SMART goals are stupid
Use this Top Gun Technique for Goals
The one way to FAIL at your goals
Three ways professional athletes crush their goals.
One of the major benefits that we need in life isn’t by looking forward as much as it is looking at our past or even current state.
When we examine how we are doing right now, our mood dictates our answer. If we are basking in the glory of a win or great performance, then we are happy and pleased.
However, if we have recently not done as well as we liked, then we are sad and angry or depressed.
It fluctuates because we are conditioned by a mindset of scarcity. (Even if we are good, it’s not for very long)
We focus on the negative and where we lack in life. You don’t have as much money as you want, not as much success, not as many friends or toys, or not as happy as you want. We all look at life and are not content, even though we have all we need, we are left wanting more…
I’m all about improvement and being the BEST at Getting BETTER. It’s just about approaching improvement and progress from a mindset of abundance rather than scarcity.
It’s just approaching improvement and progress from a mindset of abundance rather than scarcity.
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Instead of goals this year, focus on gratitude instead.
The benefits of thanks and gratitude are numerous and in fact, it’s where we need to start the process of getting better and improvement. I’m not a believer in an attitude of gratitude. It’s a myth. I believe in an action of gratitude.
We need to take certain steps toward having an abundance mindset.
That’s why instead of goals, try keeping a thanks journal.
Write out and reflect on what is positive right now in your life, even if awful stuff is happening. You can begin by focusing on people in your life and what you admire or are thankful about them. This is a choice, you can bask in the negativity of a loved one or an annoying quirk they have, or you can be thankful for their good qualities or how they positively impact you. Remember, everyone is a coach.
Your gratitude muscle and abundence mindset will improve if you just keep a thanks journal a few times a week.
Pray and if that doesn’t work, pray again. Take a few minutes just to be thankful. We don’t need to be in wonder of the splendor, but to focus on the obvious and the mundane and to be grateful.
We don’t need to be in wonder of the splendor, but to focus on the obvious and the mundane and to…
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I can wake up in the morning and be in a state of anxiousness right away by what someone else has or hasn’t done. Or I can take a few moments and address the blessings that are in my life that I take for granted. I take for granted my ability to walk, or work out, or access to fresh water, or my health or my kids loving smiles, or that I’m even alive!
It’s a choice to be hateful or grateful. But we have to exercise this choice, it doesn’t come naturally for me. Or maybe it does for you! Let me know how you do it.
We can’t be hateful or grateful at the same time however. Instead of goals this year, focus on keeping a thanks journal, making gratitude close to your heart, and enjoying the little things that we take for granted.
Remember, Make it a GREAT year, unless of course you have other plans.
Dr. Rob Bell is a Sport Psychology Coach. His company DRB & associates is based in Indianapolis. Some clients have included: Indy Eleven, University of Notre Dame, Marriott, and Walgreens. Check out all the books on Mental Toughness
December 15, 2017
Can We Avoid Burnout? Here Are Four Strategies (INFOGRAPHIC)
Can We Avoid Burnout? Here Are Four Strategies
After NO ONE Gets There ALONE was published, I was fried.
This book was so difficult to write and took so long that I was simply cashed.
Someone asked me at the book release, “what now?” I said, “A month of depression.”
It was probably just a few days of sadness, but I was burned out…
How did I know?
I told myself I was.
That and I became annoyed at every little mundane task. My tolerance level for frustration just was not there. My emotional tank was empty.
Can we avoid burnout?
Bill Walsh was one of greatest NFL coaches of all-time. Immediately after winning his 3rd Super Bowl with the team of the 80’s, the 49ers, he knew he was finished coaching.
Here is Coach Walsh in the locker room during the Super Bowl celebration with Brent Musburger asking the question if that was his last game? He started crying because he knew it was over. Bill Walsh said later ” I felt like an outsider.” An Amazing reaction to winning the Super Bowl!
The 49ers would win another Super Bowl the next season with George Seifert as the head coach. Bill Walsh couldn’t avoid burnout, so…
What better mentor to teach us all about how to avoid burnout?
Dr. Rob Bell is a Sport Psychology Coach. His company DRB & associates is based in Indianapolis. Some clients have included: Indy Eleven, University of Notre Dame, Marriott, and Walgreens. Check out all the books on Mental Toughness
November 24, 2017
12-Month Mental Toughness Reading Plan for Executives
12-Month Mental Toughness Reading Plan for Executives
There exists a business model that provides book summaries for executives. Basically, the cliff notes, so you don’t have to waste your time reading the entire book. Yikes! What is this, 9th grade?
Getting the summary of a book is not even close as actually reading it. It’s like trying to take an exercise pill to supplant working out. Get your Mental Toughness reading plan together!
Getting the summary of a book is not even close as actually reading it. It’s like trying to take an…
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Reading is a process, not a destination. The process of the mind goes when actually reading is amazing. Different parts of the brain are activated when reading different topics like facts or stories. We slow down when reading, create pictures in our head, imagine scenarios, have flashbacks, reflect, etc. One moment of reading a book can lead to that one idea or inspiration. You can’t create this process through a summary or notes.
Besides, we actually only remember one or two keys from any book anyways. It’s the process of reading that creates the change.
Don’t cheat yourself with a summary! Read the freakin’ entire book or at least digest an audio book.
Besides, if you’re a leader or coach, then you are paid to read!
Here is your 12-month mental toughness reading plan for executives. This is the list of books that I buy for all of my executives that I’m coaching… Do you have a must-read book? Email me your suggestions, I’d be happy to check them out and make another list.
MONTH/BOOK | MENTAL TOUGHNESS READING PLAN | PURPOSE
January/ Man’s Search For Meaning – Viktor Frankl INSPIRATION
February/ On Fire – John O’Leary PERSPECTIVE
March/ The Winner Within – Pat Riley LEADERSHIP
April/ How The Mighty Fall – Jim Collins LEGACY
May/ Legacy – James Kerr CULTURE
June/ The Forgotten Highlander: – Alistar Urquhart PERSPECTIVE
July/ Living With A Seal – Jesse Itzler EFFORT
August/Crucial Conversations – Patterson, et al. COMMUNICATION
September/ Extreme Ownership: – Jocko Willink LEADERSHIP
October/ The Power of Habit – Charles Duhigg HABITS
November/ Siddhartha – Herman Hesse SPIRITUALITY
December/ The Greatest Salesman in the World – Og Mandino PHILOSOPHY
Dr. Rob Bell is a Sport Psychology Coach. His company DRB & associates is based in Indianapolis. Some clients have included: Indy Eleven, University of Notre Dame, Marriott, and Walgreens. Check out all the books on Mental Toughness
November 11, 2017
How I Prepare to Present
How I Prepare to Present
The very first talk I ever gave was in front of a rival high school with hundreds of students. It was a packed gym; the entire school. I spoke at their event where students promised not to drink and drive.
I was a just freshman in college.
My arm was in a sling and it was just a few weeks removed from being involved in a drunk driving accident. It was a horrible experience.
Thank God I didn’t hurt anyone else.
I was only able to recover by allowing my MESS to become my MESSAGE. My experience had to be used to benefit others.
I hope it did, not sure.
But all I did was speak from the heart. It’s how I still prepare to present. That day I delivered. It was a pleasure to share my story. Even though I didn’t speak for probably years later, a seed was planted.
Even though I didn’t speak for probably years later, a seed was planted.
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Now, my goal when I deliver a keynote is simple.
It’s to be the best speaker that they’ve ever seen.
Sometimes it is. Most of the time it isn’t. It’s a tough goal.
I’m excited and relaxed before going up on stage to speak, but it’s only because I’m anxious and scared the days leading up to it and during the preparation.
I go through the irrational what-ifs. What if I forget what I’m doing or speaking about?
But, I’d rather it be that way than being anxious during the event.
I’m fanatical about my preparation. I probably prep for six total hours making it specific to my audience. I go through the entire talk several times. It’s the way I still prepare to present.
Preparation is key. Repetition is the mother to all learning…
Repetition is the mother to all learning…
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Goal Keeper Jon Busch has played in over 500 professional soccer matches. His training is simple, but not easy. He treats every practice like it’s the World Cup Final. Prepare to present!
Before the Super Bowl, 49ers QB Steve Young memorized all 300 plays with his quarterback coach Mike Shanahan. The night before the game after going through every play, Coach Shanahan told Steve Young, “Let’s do it just one more time.” After he completed it again, the coach told him “Okay, now you’re ready.”
The good ones practice until they get it right, the great ones practice until they can’t get it wrong.
Dr. Rob Bell is a Sport Psychology Coach. His company DRB & associates is based in Indianapolis. Some clients have included: Indy Eleven, University of Notre Dame, Marriott, and Walgreens. Check out all the books on Mental Toughness
