R.J. Blain's Blog, page 67

You want the truth? You can’t handle the truth!

My husband and I watched ‘A Few Good Men’ the other week, and the iconic line at the conclusion of the movie has stuck with me the entire time. The rage of the character, his twisted sense of justice, and the circumstances made me stop and thing–which is the exact purpose of the entire movie.

Being honest, I only watched the conclusion of the trial, and I only watched it for those two little lines. But, it’s something that has really stuck out to me the past few days.

Tomorrow, my pseudonym releases her debut novel. It’s been a topsy turvy trip, and there have been a lot of downers with it. A lot more downers than uppers.

I love books, and I love writing books. I sit down almost every single day and work on my next title, pushing through disappointment after disappointment in the hopes of beating the odds and somehow pulling the magical rabbit out of my ass.

Since I have bad luck more than I have good luck, I have tried my best to remove luck as the driving factor of my publishing efforts. I try to make up my lack of good luck in effort, and it doesn’t always work out.

New Me’s efforts have been plagued with bad luck–bad luck I’ve mostly taken in stride. My editor was plagued with migraines, had a real life emergency, and otherwise was delayed for a couple of weeks on the project. This put me behind schedule. My ARCs weren’t as polished as I liked, although the production copy was polished substantially before being loaded into Amazon.

That works out in the end, although my paranoia is now kicking in.

But, I stray from the point I wish to make. Today, my editor wailed the bad news that has her sad.

One of the authors she really liked announced she will no longer be writing stories. Why?

The author in question had a bad launch last week. In the traditional publication world, the first week of sales make or break an author. If the publisher feels they can’t earn a profit on an author quickly, they won’t renew or extend a contract. The author dies the cold, sad death of falling into obscurity.

Most authors face this demise.

Very, very few of us get lucky. This is the truth we don’t want to face, the truth we choose to ignore so we can keep doing what we love, which is writing more books.

I’ve talked about my financials before. I’m going to talk to you about it again. Readers, writers, fans, anyone who cares about authors–I’m just one example out of many. Some consider me a success story. Some consider me a failure.

I’m going to go into detail on why I’m both–and why we need to be aware of the cold, hard facts about the fiction world.

Disclaimer: I am not an expert. I’m simply someone sharing my experiences self-publishing.

I am a success because…

I make more than median for self-publishers consistently.
I sustain higher than a 4* average on amazon… and most of my reviews come from strangers. (Strangers who weren’t associated with a blog tour.)
I have fans who love my books. (And I love each and every one of you.)
Obtained membership in the SFWA on the merit of my book’s professional performance. (It keeps me trudging along sometimes.)

I am a failure because…

I don’t make minimum wage.
I don’t make median for traditionally published authors. (I’m close, though.)
I’m not popular enough to have a fan club. (I’m joking.)
I have made all of the mistakes!! ALL of them. (Seriously.)

Some of my comments are in jest, but the problem is very real.

I am a success because I make more than median for self-publishers but I am a failure because I make less than minimum wage.

I actually made minimum wage in November, and I considered popping a bottle of booze to celebrate. True story. Ultimately, I didn’t pop the bottle thanks to being sick with a head cold. I don’t need a hangover on top of that crap.

Publishing is tough. Everyone has a different opinion on what works and what doesn’t.

Here’s the thing: it ultimately boils down to luck.

If it didn’t, here would be a few facts about the industry that simply aren’t true because luck is too much of a factor.

1: All traditionally published books would be bestselling hits.

2: The same formula would work on all books.

Traditional publishers, especially the big five, know what the fuck they are doing and they can’t make all of their books hit. They can’t even make most of their books hit–very few authors actually succeed.

Think about that carefully. If there were a formula that magically worked on all books, the traditional houses would use it for each and every book–and have those books become runaway bestsellers.

Today, my editor talked to me about an author she loved who is quitting writing because of a sour launch, and she made me think.

I have released quite a few titles–9 full-length features as of tomorrow, 14 if you count the volumes within the omnibus.

Of these 14 titles, I would say I have had one actually successful launch. I am defining launch, in this case, to the two week window following release day. (If you count launch day only, I have had zero successful launches.)

What do I define as a success? I covered all of my costs, including promotion, of the title. This is a pretty low bar, being honest. Let me quantify that for you: $800.

That’s an average. Some books cost substantially more. Some cost substantially less, as I have a few folks who have generously donated their time and effort to help me produce my novels so I can keep writing more stories.

Today, my editor talked to me about an author she loved who is quitting writing because of a sour launch, and I understand that author all too well.

There have been so many days lately where I have questioned why I keep on writing. 9 full-length features, 14 total releases… and for what? A couple of hundred a month with the occasional month of making minimum wage?

When presented like that, quitting is the sane and logical choice. Ouch. That hurts.

You want the truth? You can’t handle the truth!

It applies to the publishing and artistic sector so much. This is the truth for the vast majority. I treat my writing as a job.

If I were truly treating my writing as a full-time job, I would have quit long ago, because I am not making the money I would be if I did have a full-time job. This really hurts to admit. Writing is more than a job. It’s a passion, a lifestyle, and one of the dumbest decisions I ever made in my life–but I’m sticking with it, at least for now.

Writing is hard, but I still love it, and until I stop loving it, I will keep chasing after those stories I so love telling.

I make mistakes, but with each book, I try to do better than my previous book. I want to tell stories people love. I want to eradicate every error from my titles.

I go back over my older titles time and time again to hunt out the errors I missed. (No, not the errors my editor missed, the errors I missed. This is my book, my work, my efforts, and I am the one making the mistakes.)

My editor helps me catch the mistakes, but they are ultimately my mistakes and my responsibility.

One of my mistakes was putting too much trust (and general reliance) in editors to clean up my mistakes. I’m fixing that–I have been working on fixing that for months. I’m getting better at it, slowly but surely.

I’m not perfect yet, I will never be perfect, but I want to be–and I will continue to try to be.

That’s another cold, hard truth some writers don’t want to accept. You can hire the best editors in the world, and they may miss things, and if they do… it is your fault, not theirs.

It is your book. (Editors are amazing people and do not get the credit most of them deserve, and they definitely don’t deserve any flack for mistakes in your book, because it is your book, not theirs.)

For every new writer who steps up to the bat, another quits writing because they are one of the ones who didn’t make it, and it has nothing to do with their skill–it has everything to do with their luck.

One of the authors my editor really liked quit writing last week, and they told the truth none of us wants to hear.

To so many of us, launch day means the difference between remaining an author or quitting to find greener pastures. I, too, live with the launch day realities. Will the book sell enough?

Will I get lucky?

Where is my line in the sand, and what will I do if I don’t reach it?

A little voice in the back of my head hisses, “You want the truth? You can’t handle the truth.”

Sometimes, the only option left for an author is to turn and walk away and cut losses.

I don’t want that to be my truth, but every time I release a new title, I wonder.

The Process of Writing

Every author is different. Every book is different. There are hundreds of different methods to compose a novel. My site has numerous posts about how I do things. There are thousands more on the internet. But, I think there comes a time where we have to remind ourselves of one simple truth: there is no one right way.

When I create a blog post detailing how I do something, I do so with the intent of giving people options. The only person this method works 100% for is me, and it doesn’t even work for me 100% of the time.

We’ve heard it before. Writing is hard, and this is part of the reason why. If there was one set method everyone could use to write a damned good book, we wouldn’t need a star rating system on websites because all books would be damned good books.

Over the years, my writing process has changed substantially, and I’m going to talk about what I used to do versus what I currently do. I hope you walk away with something out of this, but if you don’t, that’s okay, too.

When I first started writing, I didn’t actually have a computer of my own. I wrote in the cheapest lined notebooks my mother could get me. My sister had a computer, but she used it on her own. It wasn’t until 1-2 years after I started actually expressing interest in writing I got a computer of my own.

It was someone’s broken laptop. It didn’t have a hard drive, but it did have a zip drive, and I had to run windows from the zip drive. But hey, it worked, and went from having nothing to having something. I then got my sister’s hand me down computer.

I wrote maybe 5,000 words a year at that point in time. I also had no idea how to touch type and I had to hunt for each and every letter.

(As a side note, my mother had a typewriter, and she even let me use it sometimes… but I didn’t write very much, because paper was too expensive to waste.)

For what it’s worth, I didn’t really consider myself a writer back then. It was pure escapism, and I did it purely for my entertainment. I didn’t start thinking of myself as a writer until after I turned eighteen. Now, I wasn’t really a writer then, either–I wasn’t writing. I only did it when I was in the mood, which wasn’t often.

I transitioned from notebooks to digital after I moved to Canada, although I did write some stories on notebook paper still.

I was maybe writing 10,000 words a year at this point, usually in 2-3,000 word bursts.

That changed several years later when my husband called me out on the fact I liked claiming I was a writer and I wasn’t actually writing. I bought myself a case of Nestea, and in my determination to prove my husband wrong, I sat down and wrote my first book. I did it over the course of three days. My highest word count was approximately 33,000 words for a single day, and my fingers bled.

It was a terrible story, but I had written it, and that’s all that mattered. I proved I could.

I pantsed that story from start to finish. I continued to pants my way through stories thereafter for a few years. I actually hated the idea of writing outlines. I thought if I outlined something, it would destroy the story and ruin the love of discovery. (Note: I was miserably wrong on this point.)

I upgraded to 50,000 to 80,000 words a year of novel writing. At this point, I was starting to actually consider myself a writer. I didn’t write all the time, but I was writing every month, even if the amount was small.

Years went by, as they have this tendency to do, and somewhere along the way, I decided I wanted to become a published author. (Some might claim this was actually the biggest mistake.)

My process underwent a massive changed. I started handwriting 90% of my writing. The ‘good’ stuff I would then transcribe into the computer. Storm Without End (Closer to 50% drafted on notebook after I got done with the edits…) and The Eye of God (Pretty much exact to what I had written in the notebook) were both written in this way. Storm Surge was also written in this way.

I pantsed Storm Without End and The Eye of God. I mostly pantsed Inquisitor.

I learned pantsing leaves a lot of room for improvement and a lot of room for errors, too. I wanted to tell stronger, better stories. I wanted to take my creativity and do something better with it. I wanted to tell better stories.

I started looking at the weaknesses in my early books, and I realized I was shooting myself in the foot. I was good at pantsing–at least, I thought I was. Ego, you’re a cruel mistress.

Pantsing was hurting me more than helping me. I started making the shift to outlining (in synopsis summaries) to help me define and improve my books.

Winter Wolf was the first book I did extensive outlining on. Of course, the outline was a drastically different beast than the finished book, but I learned something very important. Outlining in synopsis summaries per arc didn’t ruin the sense of wonder and discovery. It did function as writing a draft without nearly as much time commitment. I got to know the characters better. Winter Wolf has flaws and a lot of them, but it’s a much better book for me learning I was hurting myself by pantsing.

The below image showcases my life before I learned how to outline in a way that works for me.

None of these books will ever be fit for production. They’re terrible. They all share one commonality: I pantsed them all.

This is the index of my shelf of shame, which now lives in a scrivener file for easy referencing.

This accounts for almost 600,000 words of learning, effort, and tears. Some stories I restarted over and over and over. I don’t regret pantsing these stories. I’m glad I did. I learned a lot about the writing process by writing.

I learned a hell of a lot more about the writing process by forcing myself to outline, though. I had to pay attention to character development. I had to pay attention to plot flow. I had to learn what these things actually were so I could use them effectively.

I didn’t realize I had no idea what I was doing until I realized I wasn’t outlining because I didn’t like the method… I wasn’t outlining because I didn’t know how to write a book.

Storm Without End actually changed a lot of things for me. I rewrote that book many times. To give you an idea of the amount of work I invested in trying to make it a decent book, I present to you the scrivener showing my production books.

There are enough scenes in the cut scene folder to account for almost an entire draft of the book. Five full versions plus the final production copy plus the cut scenes.

That represents several years of my life trying to learn how to tell a better story.

Your writing process should evolve. If it doesn’t, you may not be growing as a writer. That may not be an easy pill to swallow, but why should a method continue to work if you’re evolving as a writer? It shouldn’t. As your knowledge and skill grows, you’ll find better ways to work–ways that enhance your ability to tell a story.

If anyone tells you they are the authority on how to write a book, run away.

No one is. No one can tell you how to write your book. You can choose to listen to advice–and you probably should. It’s a good way to learn, even if you learn that their method doesn’t work for you.

Here is a glimpse at my current writing process, which is far different from when I just sat down and puked words onto the page. Note: This is modified from a post I had made on Google+; why reinvent the wheel when I can copy/paste?

1: Outlining.

I write a summary synopsis of the book I want to write. This is done 1-5 times on average depending on the story. Pack Justice had 4 outlines. New Pseudonym Books average 2-3 outlines for refinements.

An outline pretty much equates a draft for me because I go scene by acne to develop the world and characters. It took me almost three weeks at four or so hours a day to outline Pack Justice.

2: Drafting.

I am currently writing directly to the computer. The outline phase is done in levenger circa journals.

Note: when I draft, I edit as I draft. Whenever I start my day, I go back and edit at least one section for continuity checks and so on.

Drafting takes approximately one month for 80-100,000 words.

3: Editing.

While I do edit while I draft, I also do an editing pass of the book before I send to my copy and proofing editor.

4: Copy / Proofing Edits.

Once I get the notes back from my editor, I implement them.

5: Arc creation.

Book goes to reviewers. I do a basic scan for stupid things I may have missed during the regular edit phase as I also check over the entirety of the file for formatting issues.

6: Final Proofing.

I try to do this step as many times as possible to catch the stupid errors, on several different devices.

Every book is different, so my process does change for the specific book I am working on, but this is a pretty good summary of how my flow typically is at current.

Most importantly, find a way that works for you.

No one can hold your hand and tell you what that way is. You can only discover that way by sitting your ass down in your chair and doing the work. Becoming a writer isn’t a magical process. The road to victory is paved in your hard effort, and you only have yourself to thank or to blame for your successes and failures.

And we all fail–the real question is this: will you get back up and try again when you do?

I’m glad I did.

Beneath a Blood Moon has released!

Sara’s life turns upside down when someone leaves her a funerary urn, black roses, and death threats on her doorstep. Fearing her work as a stripper and showgirl has put her in the sights of a demented stalker, she turns to her best friend and fellow dancer for help.

Instead of a safe haven, all Sara finds is betrayal. Hunted by creatures she once believed were stories meant to frighten children, she is given a choice: become one of them, or die.

Forced to share her skin with a voracious carnivore and driven by instincts and desires too strong to resist, Sara must adapt to the changes in her life or be destroyed by them. Finding a mate is her wolf’s top priority.

If she doesn’t want to become another prostitute in a city full of them, Sara must learn to control the beast within. With a hungry wolf to feed and an empty bank account, selling herself to the highest bidder may be the only way she has to prevent becoming a monster driven to eat anything—or anyone—unfortunate enough to cross her path.

Beneath a Blood Moon is a standalone novel in the Witch & Wolf world. For those interested in the timeline, it falls sometime after the events of Inquisitor but before the events in Blood Diamond. (Chronically, Winter Wolf is the first book for all I published it second in the series.)

Beneath a Blood Moon is now available on Amazon!

As , this will be my last release for a while. I’ll be back to posting writing-related material in the next month or so. That part isn’t going to change.

Thanks for reading!

What’s in a Name?

In 2012, I launched my debut book, the Eye of God. Like most debut authors, I was quite proud of the time–I still am, despite its numerous warts and problems. I had a string of editorial issues. I hadn’t found a superb proofing editor at that point. I learned a lot about writing. I’m still learning a lot about writing. I don’t think I’ll ever stop learning about writing.

Each book I write is stronger than the one before it, and I hope this doesn’t change until the day I retire my pen once and for all.

I shared every single step of the process with all of you. I shared every failure and success. I put numbers out there. I discussed how I did what I did and why. I discussed how a failure happened–and what made up a success for me.

When I started my website, my altruistic nature bit me in the ass. I had so many problems finding good information on the internet about establishing a writing career. I didn’t want people to endure the same sort of frustration. I started documenting everything I did, my processes, and how I was struggling to become a writer.

In short, I was connecting with other writers without really reaching readers. This is fine with me–I love working with writers. I love talking with writers. I’m a writer. We’re a very special breed, and supporting each other is so often in our blood.

But, it doesn’t make for commercial success. (Don’t get me wrong, many writers are avid book lovers and readers, but most of us are in my shoes: scraping pennies together to buy cover art and so on.)

In my last post, I declared I was stepping away from working on Requiem for the Rift King and Witch & Wolf–and the Fall of Erelith. I have plans to continue these series, but here’s the thing:

I have built my name hiding my  gender to fit the expectations of a crowd who dosn’t like female writers.

I have built my name and reputation among writers.

I have not built very much for me–for what I want to be.

I want to be a proud woman writing science fiction and fantasy.

RJ Blain isn’t a proud woman. She’s rather genderless, hiding behind a mask hoping to become something she’s not. Forgive the third person for a few minutes–there are two mes I’m discussing here.

I have been working on a pseudonym. No, I’m not saying what the pseudonym is–I will explain later. I have two identities.

RJ Blain is my real name with initials. My pseudonym is actually the author name I originally picked for myself over a decade ago. She’s very obviously a woman–and she’s far more close to a genuine me than ‘RJ Blain’ me. RJ Blain me is afraid of the sad and rabid puppies, because she’s seen their cruelty to other women writing science fiction and fantasy first hand. She’s had run-ins with them herself.

Sad and rabid puppies are too often cruel people. Why? They don’t feel women have any business writing speculative fiction. Some are more vocal about it.

New Me, New and Genuine Me, has only one thing to say to the naysayers:

Go fuck yourselves. I’m a woman, and I’ll write science fiction and fantasy, and I don’t give a fucking shit if you don’t like it. Go cry into your damned beer and choke on it while you’re at it.

RJ Blain me isn’t that brave.

Under my pseudonym, I am shedding out of the old clothes and wearing new ones… and it took me from 2012 to now to develop the skills and confidence to make this move.

My writing skills have dramatically changed from 2012 until now.

What’s in a name, exactly?

Let’s talk about it. What is in my name?

RJ Blain loves helping people. That’s in my name. I didn’t edit for so long for the money, although I used my earnings to help my writing. I love books, and I love people.

Here is what’s in my name, and I’m proud of each and every accomplishment.

The Eye of God
Storm Without End
Inquisitor
Winter Wolf
Storm Surge
Blood Diamond
Tales of the Winter Wolf (Vol 1-5)
Beneath a Blood Moon

In these eight novels are 860,000 (approximate) words of my life. Some of the words are wrong. Some of them could be written better. Some of them are in dire need of grooming. But all of them came from me. All of them I worked hard on, even though they’re imperfect in so many ways.

What’s in my name? These books.

Here’s also what’s in my name, and I’m proud of this, too, for so many difference reasons:

Over twenty authors given a chance to have developmental edits they could afford.
Five years of service in NaNoWriMo as a Municipal Liaison.
Writing Workshops and Panels in the Montreal area.
This website, with all of its warts, information on writing, and general news.

Most of all, I’m proud of my accomplishments, both fiscal and emotional. What’s in my name? There’s a lot of things, and so many of them are good.

As a woman, I’ve been told over and over the same shit. Here’s a list:

Be humble
Keep your head down
Don’t reveal you’re a woman openly
Women can’t do what you’re doing–you want to write like a man.

And I listened, and that was a mistake. I want to be humble, because that is part of who I am. But I should be proud of what I’ve accomplished–and proud of the fact I’m willing to sit down and help others whenever I can.

I may not be writing new books under RJ Blain for a while, but I won’t be abandoning my website. However, I will be writing about my efforts as an entirely new person breaking into a writing career again.

Second chances and all that.

I know a lot of authors have pseudonyms. I also know a lot of them are extremely open about it. If you love my books and want to know who I’m writing as, reach out. I’ll send you the links.

But I am not going to announce it in public. If the identity spreads, I don’t have a problem with this. But, RJ Blain has always been more than just me. In so many ways, my identity as an author, as RJ Blain, has been built by other writers–writers who found this website, found useful information, and wanted to help out.

If only I could really show you how much I have appreciated your help over the years. I really have. Every time someone has come up to me, telling me one of my posts really helped them, it has been a little like a light in the darkness.

As many of you know, I suffer from depression. I control it fairly well, but it’s always there under the surface.

My decision to hide behind my initials makes it worse. It’s not me. It’s not who I really am.

So, while I will be coming back to this name, I will be doing so in a few years, and I will be saying, “Hello. My book titles say RJ Blain, but my name is Rebecca, and I’m pleased to meet you. I’m a woman, and I write science fiction and fantasy.”

I will tackle all of the things I hid face on, and do so with pride.

In the mean time, I am going to let myself out of the cage I built, and I will pursue the stories I never had the courage to tell–until now.

Readers, fans, lovers of books–I haven’t forgotten about you. Without you, I am nothing.

But, I don’t want the writers to feel they have to contribute to me financially because I give away what I’ve learned. That isn’t going to change. The nature of it, however, will. I’ll still be using RJBlain.com as a platform for discussing writing, my process, and what works and doesn’t for me.

The only difference is, the books I discuss will be a bit of a mystery. There won’t be links to the titles. What you will find here is for you, and it will be without obligation.

But What if I want to know?

Among the writers are those who genuinely love my books, my characters, and my worlds.

You’re welcome to join me on my new adventure… but you’ll have to reach out to me. Consider it a scavenger hunt. New Me is out there, somewhere.

Here’s how you can find me:

Use facebook. Find RJ Blain. Confirm it’s me. Send a message and ask. I will tell you–in private.
Use google plus. Send me a post, tag me, and ask. I will tell you–in private.
Use Twitter. Send me a message, and ask. I will tell you–in private.
Finish reading this post and send me an email. We’ll talk.

I’m sure someone will eventually blurt, “RJ Blain is $This Author!”

In public, I will deny, deny, deny… but in private?

You’ll be right.

If you love supporting me as an author because you like me as a person, reach out to me. We’ll talk. If you have questions on my decision, I’m happy to discuss them with you. There are a lot of ways you can help me, if you truly want to. Not because of guilt, not because I begged, and certainly not because you felt an obligation.

I want New Me to have a fresh start, and I want her to share her books with people who just want to love fun stories–without any strings attached.

blain (dot) rj (at) gmail (dot) com

Write me, if you want. And if you don’t… keep enjoying this website. This is for you, and always has been.

Thanks for reading, thanks for writing, and thanks for being my friend.

You mean the world to me.

A Letter to Me: Building Towards the Future

Hello, Me.

There are a lot of things we want to do in the near future. We want to finish the main four-book series of Witch & Wolf. We want to release two science fiction novels. We want to make a career out of writing.

It’s been busy.

But, things are crazy lately. We’ve produced a lot of books this year. Storm Surge flopped; I’m glad we wrote it, and we’ll continue to series, but we haven’t broken even on investment costs on that novel yet. Blood Diamond did well–we’re actually making money instead of losing it on that one. Tales of the Winter Wolf isn’t doing bad either; we’re in the black there, too.

Here’s the thing. We’re moving soon, and winter is a good month for pure drafting. Beneath a Blood Moon nears completion.

Once we’re finished that book, we are going to go into full draft mode.

Fans, readers, loved ones–anyone who cares, this part of the letter is for you.

I will likely not be releasing another novel after Beneath a Blood Moon for a year or more. I’ll be writing, and I’ll be writing a lot, but I’ve decided I will not be producing titles. I’ll be working on them, self-editing, and preparing them for publication, but I want to be able to go on a drafting frenzy.

Editing takes a lot out of me, and once I get into an editing groove, it’s difficult for me to break out of it. So, this comes with a silver lining.

2017 or 2018 will see a lot of titles from me. I fully intend on releasing a novel once every month or two for several months once I finish my drafting cycle. There are several reasons for this.

At the top of the list is money. Right below money is my upcoming move to the United States. I need to be able to focus on my real life and my family, and moving to a different country is very difficult–and stressful!

So, I’m writing. I’ll still be blogging, but I won’t be publishing for a while. I need the time to write without worrying about crippling my creativity with editing. I need the time to do other things.

Here are the books I hope to release in 2017/2018, once i have some money for the editorial work (and other things.)

Silver Bullet (Conclusion of Witch & Wolf)
The Tides of War (Requiem for the Rift King Book 3)
Project Zeta (Science Fiction)
Zero (Science Fiction)
City of Clocks
Rider of the Sun Horse
Royal Slaves (The Fall of Erelith Book 2.)

Many of these novels already have their cover work–or it is on the way. This was a hard decision to make, but I think my writing will be better for having the opportunity to spend a year simply writing for the love of writing.

I considered a crowdfund, but I decided against it. Instead, I will be saving the royalties from the books I already have out and using those funds to continue my writing career.

Thanks for bearing with me, folks. I really appreciate. I may not be producing novels for a year and a half, but hey… if George R R Martin can go six years between books, I can go a year and a half.

Sorry for the delays, folks, but this is for the better–for all of us.

Readers, Writers, and Literary Prejudices

Recently, I was blessed to become friends and acquaintances with a few other SFWA and RWA authors who have been around the block. These ladies were in the industry as professionals–with livable careers–long before self-publishing came along. These ladies have been published by the big houses–and most of them still are with the big houses.

While I have traditionally published a short story, I”m a self-publishing author. I started from the ground and worked my way up, learning the ins and outs of publishing from bitter sweet experience. I didn’t have an agent to hold my hand–I don’t have one to hold my hand. Some days, I wish I did.

But my interactions with these individuals has made me think about writers, readers, and literary prejudices. What, exactly, is a literary prejudice?

In my opinion and experience, literary prejudice is a mindset where readers expect a certain thing. If they do not get said thing, the author is ostracized. For example: A romance author who typically writes happily ever after endings will be harnessed into always writing happily ever after endings because this is expected of him or her.

She s/he stray from this path, the readers’ literary prejudice kicks in, resulting in a mass exodus of fans/buyers. It’s not something as easily defined as racism, sexism, or some other form of common prejudice. It’s something that goes deeper.

Once an author finds their niche, literary prejudice is what happens if the author decides to write something different that falls outside of the ‘comfort zone’ of their basic readership.

Some readers will simply ignore the ‘straying’ title. Others will ostracize the author completely. Depending on the originating genre of the author, this may result in the reader never buying any more titles by that author.

I am actually experiencing this to a certain degree, although I simply do not have the readership to see as staggering of an affect as the large-house, traditional authors.

The first novel I released was a dark–a very dark–traditional fantasy. It is edgy, and it takes a plunge into subject matter many dislike discussing. The Fall of Erelith is a very difficult series for me to write. I’ve been working on book 2, Royal Slaves, in fits and bursts since I finished The Eye of God, but it’s a story that’s very hard for me to tell. (It is also not a profitable story, which doesn’t help matters any for me.)

The second novel I released was a dark epic fantasy. It doesn’t challenge as many things, focusing instead on the action and adventure I love in fantasy. I wrote Storm Without End for me as much as I wrote it for others. I broke loads of rules, learning a lot about my identity as an author.

With these two books, I started setting myself up for the niche I would fit in: dark, edgy, and intense fantasy fiction.

The trend continued with Inquisitor. It is as much of a thriller as it is an urban fantasy, and once again, I broke loads of rules while learning more about my identity as an author.

Winter Wolf followed suit, and I dug the trench deeper, delving into some of the darker aspects of humanity. Dark, dark, dark.

None of these novels have a lot of romance in them.

In Blood Diamond, I started to break out of the shell I had created for myself with my previous novels. Romance became a minor theme–minor compared to true ‘romance’ authors. The dark and the unpleasant sides of humanity remain in Blood Diamond, playing to my love of thrillers and suspense. I stay true to my action/adventure roots.

Then I made a mistake. I was interested in finding out the depth of love Richard Murphy had for Nicolina Desmond before the events of Winter Wolf. I knew some of it–how they fought, some of their circumstances, and some of the games they played. But, I didn’t know the whole story.

I wanted to tell that story. I wanted to know what kind of woman Nicolina had been before she had lost her memories. I wanted to know what kind of man Richard had been before tragedy stole away the most precious thing in his life.

I wanted to find out the depth of Richard’s love that would drive him into doing so much for a woman who remembered nothing about him.

It’s romance. This is far outside of the dark fantasies I had spent so much time focusing on. It’s not intense romance, not in the way a good romance writer handles it. There’s still plenty of darkness, action, and adventure, but the lighter side of their love often comes up. There’s a good amount of humor in it as well.

I escaped the mold of my normal writing and–heaven forbid–tried something new.

I expanded my boundaries, perhaps not as well as I could have, but I’ve learned something sad about the reading industry:

Literary prejudice is alive and well.

It’s the same mentality of critics who attack other readers for enjoying a novel like Twilight, though I’m far from ever reaching that level personally. Readers get set in their expectations, and when their expectations are not met–or worse, they’re challenged–bad things happen to the author who simply wanted to tell a story in the way they wanted to tell the story.

My readers and fans, many of whom enjoyed The Fall of Erelith, Witch & Wolf, and Requiem novels, are finding my detour into this new project disconcerting.

Will all of my future books be romance drivels? Will I leave the dark fantasy niche for fluffy romance where no one of importance is permitted to die? These sort of things begin to haunt me.

Beneath a Blood Moon is as much dark fantasy as it is romance; some parts of it explore the emotions of love. Others delve into the bleaker aspects of humanity. In a way, yes, I will stray from the utter dark of my beginning novels. There’s a reason for that.

Without light, there are no shadows.

Without those lighter elements, without that romance, love, and friendship between characters, the darkness is a pale shade of gray. It lacks the utter blackness of true despair because there’s nothing to contrast it with.

In a way, I hope by exploring more of the good parts of life, I can make the darker elements stronger. I hope I can make the action and adventure more intense. I want people to care about my characters–all aspects of them.

In my first novel, the lighter side of humanity, including love and romance, is a far-off dream: a desire held by the characters out of their reach. Acceptance, freedom, and the basic rights to a humane existence are also stakes. The Eye of God’s culture and society is an oppressive place.

The story isn’t about the contrasts between good and evil, light and darkness. It’s a story about finding out how deep the rabbit hole goes and learning there is a sky with a sun out there.

The world starts in that bleary gray, and the characters must overcome all that stands before them in order to find that light. That contrast is their goal and destination instead of the medium used to paint the piece.

As the story progresses, the darkness with get darker, but that’s because the characters grow to have things to lose–and things to gain. For women, if they find the courage, the strength, and determination, they have a chance to become equals and break free of the patriarchy binding them as slaves to their men. For men, it is breaking free of the rigid structure controlling every aspect of their lives.

For slaves, it’s about becoming human in the eyes of others.

Every novel I write is different, and that may ultimately become my undoing.

I don’t want to be an author readers go to for a safe expectation of content. I want each book to be a surprise. Will there be a romance tucked between the sheets of a dark action adventure? Will there be humor in the dark, epic fantasy?

It may cost me my career and brand, but if it means I must fall victim to the literary prejudice game, that’s okay.

 

Literary value is overrated anyway. Read what you love to read.

The instant you fall in love with a book is the instant it has the greatest literary value on Earth, no matter what the critics may say. So yes, while I tease and taunt Fifty Shades of Grey/Gray (How is his name spelled again?!), while I have my opinions on it, if that book makes you want to read, it’s a great book.

Don’t let anyone tell you otherwise or make you ashamed of your enjoyment of reading a book–any book, even one ‘society’ deems is horrible. If you love it, it’s a great book.

Literary prejudice can go suck a lemon.

 

Read what you love reading, and don’t let anyone take that away from you. Just remember, literary prejudice is a bad thing… and your favorite authors might feel trapped by the graves they have dug for themselves in their efforts to maintain a living for themselves. (It’s okay to dislike a book or series an author writes–don’t turn your back on them completely just because a few books aren’t up your alley. Remember, authors love variety, too. They want to write what they love to read… and many authors have a broad variety of loves and interests. I know I do.

Thanks for reading.

New & Upcoming Releases

I’ve been off the radar lately. I’ve been busy trying to release a bunch of stories. Writing is such a hard career, but the further I delve into it, the more I realize I simply don’t want another career. Sure, I’d likely be a lot more successful financially doing something else, but I’m a storyteller.

Authors are told to be humble, don’t beg, and so on, but I’m going to overstep my bounds and be upfront and honest with you: there are lots of ways you can help support authors, but buying our books is the most important thing you can do. If you see a book that catches your eye, please consider buying a copy or gifting one to a friend. (My cats thank you for your contribution to their food fund.)

Like my books? Please consider leaving a review on amazon telling other readers what you liked about the titles! Every little bit helps. Thank you so much!

New & Upcoming Releases

June 2015

Blood Diamond, Witch & Wolf #3

The world is full of corpses, and Jackson knows them by name. When a group strives to destroy the Inquisition, his powers may be all standing between the supernaturals and extinction.

However, when he learns the truth behind the deaths of his wife and unborn daughter, Jackson may prove to be the greatest threat of all to the survival of mankind…

July 2015

Tales of the Winter Wolf ( Volume One & Volume Two )

Long before Nicolina Desmond manifested her powers as a wizard, she was a Normal girl with extraordinary circumstances. In order to prove herself and escape her father’s chokehold on her life, she’s determined to get on the fast track towards an independent life.

However, she never anticipated how meeting Richard Murphy would change her life…

Tales of the Winter Wolf follows the adventures of Nicole and Richard, predominant characters from Witch & Wolf #2, Winter Wolf. Spoilers for the novel are contained within!

August 2015

Tales of the Winter Wolf ( Volume Three & Volume Four )

September 2015

Tales of the Winter Wolf ( Volume Five )

Omnibus – Tales of the Winter Wolf ( Volumes 1-5 )

Long before Nicolina Desmond manifested her powers as a wizard, she was a Normal girl with extraordinary circumstances. In order to prove herself and escape her father’s chokehold on her life, she’s determined to get on the fast track towards an independent life.

However, she never anticipated how meeting Richard Murphy would change her life…

Tales of the Winter Wolf follows the adventures of Nicole and Richard. These short stories and novellas contain spoilers for Witch & Wolf #2, Winter Wolf.

Purchasing the Omnibus is cheaper than acquiring all of the volumes individually. ($6.99 for the omnibus compared to $9.95 if you buy them all individually.)

This omnibus contains the following stories:

Volume One

Hunted

The Scent of Guilt

Firecracker

Glitter

Volume Two

Charmed

Crash and Burn

Wild Wolf

Volume Three

The Silvered Wolf

The Games Wolves Play

Volume Four

Tangles

Witch

Striking a Deal

In Hot Water

Breaking Point

Volume Five

The Power of a Word

Bonds

The Value of a Life

Shattered

November 2015

Beneath a Blood Moon

Sara’s life turns upside down when someone leaves her funerary urns, black roses, and death threats on her doorstep. Fearing her work as a stripper and showgirl has put her in the sights of a demented stalker, she turns to her best friend and fellow dancer for help.

Instead of a safe haven, all Sara finds is betrayal. Hunted by creatures she once believed were stories meant to frighten children, she is given a choice: become one of them, or die.

Forced to share her skin with a voracious carnivore and driven by instincts and desires too strong to resist, Sara must adapt to the changes in her life or be destroyed by them. Finding a mate is her wolf’s top priority.

If she doesn’t want to become another prostitute in a city full of them, Sara must learn to control the beast within. With a hungry wolf to feed and an empty bank account, selling herself to the highest bidder may be the only way she has to prevent becoming a monster driven to eat anything—or anyone—unfortunate enough to cross her path.

Tentative Releases (2016)

This list includes the books I hope to release in 2016. They’re all in various stages of completion, so I’d like to get them produced!

Project Zeta (Space Opera/Science Fantasy)
City of Clocks (Traditional Fantasy with Steampunk elements)
Royal Slaves (Fall of Erelith Book 2)
Zero (Science Fiction/Science Fantasy)

Thanks for your support!!

Beneath a Blood Moon

I have been pretty quiet on social media lately. I’ve been working on a new book. Beneath a Blood Moon is an urban fantasy romance/action adventure/thriller/mystery. It started its life as a romance, got lost along the way, and ended up an action/adventure starring a cast of romantics incapable of keeping their pants on in the presence of their beloved. (It’s not erotica. It’s all fade-to-black. Your imaginations are better than my pitiable attempts at smut, so I will never force you to endure that horror.)

There’s just a little bit of steam. Just a little.

About the Book

Sara’s life turns upside down when someone leaves her funerary urns, black roses, and death threats on her doorstep. Fearing her work as a stripper and showgirl has put her in the sights of a demented stalker, she turns to her best friend and fellow dancer for help.

Instead of a safe haven, all Sara finds is betrayal. Hunted by creatures she once believed were stories meant to frighten children, she is given a choice: become one of them, or die.

Forced to share her skin with a voracious carnivore and driven by instincts and desires too strong to resist, Sara must adapt to the changes in her life or be destroyed by them. Finding a mate is her wolf’s top priority.

If she doesn’t want to become another prostitute in a city full of them, Sara must learn to control the beast within. With a hungry wolf to feed and an empty bank account, selling herself to the highest bidder may be the only way she has to prevent becoming a monster driven to eat anything—or anyone—unfortunate enough to cross her path.

Yet Another Look at KDP Select, the July 2015 Edition

I finally have a full month of data on KDP Select’s new Pay per Page scheme. I’ve discussed this before. I’m discussing it again because I feel it is important to be open about my career–or partial lack of one.

In July 2015, I almost made minimum wage on my writing work. I may have leaked a little. I’m not quite there, and I acknowledge it is only one month. If I count conversion rate to my currency, I did make minimum wage. (Because I’m judgmental, especially towards myself, I’m eyeballing my new home for minimum wage.)

Oh, by the way, unless something drastic happens, I’m moving to California! So many of my problems will be solved!! I won’t be restricted by all of the not-available-to-Residents-of-Quebec rulings any longer!

I made you a fancy chart to show you how my works performed in July 2015, using estimates. Until August 15, I won’t have the official numbers. All Pay per Page royalties are calculated at 0.0058.

The first chart is simple. It shows the novel, the amount paid out in Pay per Read Royalties, the amount paid out in normal sales royalties, and the totals.

Note: All figures are estimates.

Title
Pay Per Read
Sales
Total


Blood Diamond
$181.37
$151.34
$332.71


Inquisitor
$114.17
$72.72
$186.89


Storm Surge
$21.18
$34.20
$55.38


Storm Without End
$17.21
$4.65
$21.86


TotWW 1
$14.14
$18.63
$32.77


TotWW 2
$0.01
$12.42
$12.43


The Eye of God
$0.02
$0.00
$0.02


Winter Wolf
$115.52
$36.90
$152.42


Totals
$463.62
$330.86
$794.48

To give you an idea of how much of a difference the new payment method has made, I made $249.63 in June 2015. That is a 3.1x increase between June and July. While the new releases of Blood Diamond and TotWW helped, it’s worth pointing out I still made more excluding those titles–and June had a week of Blood Diamond sales, which made up a substantial chunk of my income for June.

In the previous method of payment, I only got paid when a reader reached 10% of a novel. I write longer books, although Tales of the Winter Wolf are shorter compilations of stories about two characters. The novels are definitely paying out more, but it’s worth noting even the short fiction is doing fine under the new scheme.

The following chart assumes everyone reads the title (which is totally not accurate!) This is just a demonstration to get an idea of how many people read over the month.

Something of note: The 2 pages of Tales of the Winter Wolf volume 2 counted in right before the month switched over. The reader finished the book after the month cut off. (How do I know this? Exact match of pages in the title matched the stats in the morning. The reader started reading right before the time switched over in the system and finished in the same sitting.) There’s something interesting about this I should also point out.

The total number of pages read is affected by the front matter/end matter. I include samples of my other books in the backs of my titles. Sometimes readers look them over, sometimes they don’t. These count for Amazon’s system, but they skew the total reads.

Looking at how the stats have flowed over the month, with the exception of my debut novel, most readers seem to be finishing my books.

(I may have leaked a little when the realization sank in.)

Title
Pages Read
Total Reads


Blood Diamond
31,270
37.86


Inquisitor
19,685
32.38


Storm Surge
3,652
4.88


Storm Without End
2,967
4.87


Tales of the Winter Wolf, Vol. 1
2,438
11.34


Tales of the Winter Wolf, Vol. 2
2
0.01


The Eye of God
3
0.01


Winter Wolf
19,917
28.01


Grand Total
79,934
119.35

Here’s where things start getting really interesting. I sell my books between $1.99 (Tales of the Winter Wolf) to $4.99 (Blood Diamond.) In order to demonstrate how the KDP Select system is currently advantageous to me, here are my sales figures for July 2015.

Title
Copies Sold


Blood Diamond
46


Inquisitor
36


Storm Surge
10


Storm Without End
3


Tales of the Winter Wolf, Vol. 1
27


Tales of the Winter Wolf, Vol. 2
18


The Eye of God
0


Winter Wolf
15


Grand Total
155

I had more sales than I had estimated reads, but because of how KDP Select is paying out, I made more from KDP Select’s Pay per Read scheme than traditional sales.

In order to make the same royalties as the Pay per Read scheme, I would have had to charge the following for my books:

Note: Because Tales of the Winter Wolf is sold at a 35% royalty rate, I set the rate to $2.99, the amount needed to earn 70%. Any title with a calculated sales $ per book below $2.99 was set to $2.99 for this reason. There’s no way to realistically reach the royalty earnings for these titles because of how royalty payments actually work.

Title
Royalty Per Title
Sales $ Per Book


Blood Diamond
$4.79
$6.23


Inquisitor
$3.53
$4.58


Storm Surge
$4.34
$5.65


Storm Without End
$3.53
$4.59


Tales of the Winter Wolf, Vol. 1
$1.25
$2.99


Tales of the Winter Wolf, Vol. 2
$1.14
$2.99


The Eye of God
$2.23
$2.99


Winter Wolf
$4.12
$5.36

No, I won’t be changing how I price things to match KDP Select’s new system. I want my books to be affordable. The only titles I foresee selling at higher than $4.99 are my omnibuses or exceptionally long titles–by that, I mean titles exceeding 150,000 words by a notable margin. (Blood Diamond is a 150,000 word monster.)

I am undecided what I’ll charge for books longer than that. I don’t even know if I’ll write titles longer than that! I expect Silver Bullet will be a monster, but we’ll see when I get to actively writing it.

I’ll let the numbers do the talking for me. KDP Select exclusivity is working for me, and until the other marketplaces can offer something equally competitive, I’ll probably be staying.

Don’t make the mistake of believing I’m an Amazon fangirl. I’m going to be brutally honest here:

I go with the money. I’ve tried ePub marketplaces, and being blunt once more, I simply didn’t make the necessary amount of money. (And it was not for lack of effort and investment in the marketplace. I simply connect easier and better with readers who use Amazon.)

So, there you have it. July 2015’s estimated figures.

P.S.: The image above is the progress on Project Zeta’s cover.

12 Days Later: A Second Look at Amazon’s Exclusive Royalty System

I wrote about how I was really liking the payment per page model Amazon released on July 1, 2015. I did a rundown of how it was performing for me in the opening days.

I chose today to do another look because it’s one day prior to a new release. (Shameless plug: Like my blog? My royalties help pay for it. Don’t be shy, buy a book. Winter Wolf is still available for free today and Tales Vol 1 drops tomorrow.)

Shameless plug out of the way, let’s get to the nitty-gritty and talk some numbers.

I really like the changes to Amazon’s exclusive royalty system. I have created two tables to help demonstrate why this system is beneficial to authors who are telling good, engaging stories.

That doesn’t mean page turners. It means just what I said: good stories. Engaging stories. Stories people finish. Stories people want to read.

The author was always responsible for writing engaging stories. Now we have to put up or shut up. I’m okay with that. I know lots aren’t–it’s harder to write good stories. Skilled authors should be able to have a better chance of success, in my opinion.

Anyone, onto the numbers.

This chart shows my current regular, paid sales for Amazon.com.

Title
Copies Sold
Royalty
Royalty Per Book


Blood Diamond
19
$61.95
$3.26


Inquisitor
18
$36.72
$2.04


Storm Surge
6
$20.52
$3.42


Storm Without End
2
$3.09
$1.55


Winter Wolf
3
$8.18
$2.73


Totals
48
$130.46
$2.72

 

Unfortunately, I have zero way of showing comparison data for sales; Blood Diamond is a new release, but I didn’t have it launched 12 full days in June, so I can’t use last month’s numbers.

This chart shows page data for these titles. This will take a bit of explaining, so please bear with me.

Pages read is the number of pages readers collectively read. I do not receive data on the number of readers. Pay per page is the estimated royalty figures Amazon will be paying out.

PP Royalties is Pay Per Page Royalties; it is calculated by multiplying pages read and the pay per page. # Pages is from Amazon’s back end. Estimated # of reads is simply the total pages and the number of pages divided. This is an inaccurate number. I have no way of knowing how many people have actually read the book. But, if I assume that every reader reads the entire book, that’s the number of reads. Let’s face it, that’s not the case. I’m hoping to get a number of readers figure from amazon but I wouldn’t count it.

Finally, Per Page Roy / Book is the Royalties I receive per book.

Title
Pages Read
Pay / Page
PP Royalties
# Pages
Est # of Reads
Per Page Roy / Book


Blood Diamond
10904
0.0058
$63.24
826
13.20
$4.79


Inquisitor
7266
0.0058
$42.14
608
11.95
$3.53


Storm Surge
748
0.0058
$4.34
749
1.00
$4.34


Storm Without End
1169
0.0058
$6.78
609
1.92
$3.53


Winter Wolf
5573
0.0058
$32.32
711
7.84
$4.12


Totals
25660
0.0058
$148.83
700.6
36.63
$4.06

So, in short… I am currently making substantially more in the KDP Select exclusive system per book than I am from regular sales–even at the $4.99 price point. (See Blood Diamond.) I am actually making a dollar more per full read in the new system. I’m also making more in the new system than I am from actual sales.

To give you an idea of the old system, here are my numbers for the entirety of May. (This only includes earnings for loaned books.)

In short, I have almost made as much as I did in May in the first 13 days of July.

Inquisitor
$50.34


Storm Surge
$34.78


Storm Without End
$27.39


The Eye of God
$5.42


Winter Wolf
$37.61


Grand Total
$155.54

I understand why short story authors are up in arms over the changes, but there’s something to be said for equality–and if the short story authors are telling good stories, they aren’t going to suffer. People will read all of their stories if they’re engaging their reader.

But that’s the thing:

Authors are now required to perform, not just have a title that catches their eye. The traditional folks may not like this either, because it puts the onus on us, as authors, to entertain our readers–we are no longer living in a world where we get paid whether or not our fans and readers actually read the book.

Now we have to tell stories people want to read.

That’s great for readers. That’s really great for readers. That’s fabulous for readers. It encourages us authors to go above and beyond and really aim to make our words the best they can be, and I like that.

It’ll be hard work, but it’s already hard work I’m willing to invest. For some, that may be a bitter pill to swallow.

Personally, I’ll jump at any chance I can get to make my writing career financially viable.