R. Felini's Blog, page 2
September 26, 2017
Lee Child is back, Jack!
No Middle Name: The Complete Collected Jack Reacher Short Stories
I know I said that Lee Child was finished. Dead in the water. I may have been premature. We will see.
But if you haven't bothered with his 2017 book "No Middle Name" : The Complete Collected Jack Reacher Short Stories because of his last disappointing piece of crap he wrote for the money - I suggest you try the first story, "Too Much Time". This is back to the original, before writing for page count Child. I breezed through it because it was good and exciting. Remember like we used to get from him?
I don't know. Maybe he woke up one morning and decided to make his own cup of java instead of having his butler send to Starbucks for a creamy latte with extra chocolate sprinkles. Maybe a month or two in AA set him straight. Maybe his girlfriend finally got into rehab and lost 2, 3 hundred pounds off her thighs. I do know that sometimes you gotta kick the ass of a Child to get him or her back on track.
Welcome back Mr. Child.
But know this - WE ARE WATCHING YOU - DON'T SCREW IT UP!
R Felini www.feliniworld.wordpress.com
Author at Your Service (no just kidding!)
Amazon direct: http://tinyurl.com/o5ez35y
I know I said that Lee Child was finished. Dead in the water. I may have been premature. We will see.
But if you haven't bothered with his 2017 book "No Middle Name" : The Complete Collected Jack Reacher Short Stories because of his last disappointing piece of crap he wrote for the money - I suggest you try the first story, "Too Much Time". This is back to the original, before writing for page count Child. I breezed through it because it was good and exciting. Remember like we used to get from him?
I don't know. Maybe he woke up one morning and decided to make his own cup of java instead of having his butler send to Starbucks for a creamy latte with extra chocolate sprinkles. Maybe a month or two in AA set him straight. Maybe his girlfriend finally got into rehab and lost 2, 3 hundred pounds off her thighs. I do know that sometimes you gotta kick the ass of a Child to get him or her back on track.
Welcome back Mr. Child.
But know this - WE ARE WATCHING YOU - DON'T SCREW IT UP!
R Felini www.feliniworld.wordpress.com
Author at Your Service (no just kidding!)
Amazon direct: http://tinyurl.com/o5ez35y
June 27, 2016
Are TV News breasts getting bigger?
Are the breasts of the women reporters on TV News Shows in Chicago getting bigger? I think so. And I think it is not evolution at work either – else wise their asses would be huge too from all that sitting and eating cake. Heaven knows they all report the same stories done by the same stringers and agencies. But I digress.
My proof you say? How about Marissa Bailey on Channel 2 CBS? Or have you taken a look at the profiles on Marley Kayden, Michelle Relerford, or Alicia Roman on NBC Channel 5?
My God man if you want to work up a sweat watch Kristen Nicole or Jenny Milkowski on Fox News Channel 32 in Chicago!
After watching their informative reading of the teleprompter I feel like I could use some private time. I am a connoisseur of the well-endowed and can assure you that what you are seeing is an “upsizing” as we in the trade call it. Now it is true that none of the ladies I have mentioned have allowed me to perform any actual measuring of the aforementioned tatas. If I were allowed this, for scientific evaluation, I could tell you definitely whether I am right or not.
Well, tell me your opinion and if you have large breasts please put your thoughts down. Not sure about your breast size? I can perform a diagnostic motorboat on you that will discern your actual size. Free of charge for first-timers. Happy Hunting!
PS.Somaya Reece on cover picture above.
https://feliniworld.wordpress.com/201...
Copyright © 2016 by R Felini
May 31, 2016
New Scientific Breakthrough to End Income Disparity – Wage Inequality!
New Scientific Breakthrough to End Income Disparity – Wage Inequality!
New Scientific Breakthrough to End Income Disparity
By INS Staff
“We now have the tool we need to end poverty.” according to Doctor Felini from the Bringham Order Of Brothers.
By combining technology with social psychology, scientists and lawmakers say they have a solution to a problem for most of the world. But the start will be in the United States.
“It is not necessary to travel to Africa to find poor people to experiment with,” says Dr. Felini, “we can find white, black and brown peoples living in total poverty right here in the good old US of A. For years we believed that everyone in America was doing fine and many rich Hollywood types were duped into traveling to foreign countries to find poor people suffering so they could help.”
Photo from security camera. Suspect identified by bystanders as “Scrooge”.
“But after extensive research funded by the taxpayer, studies have shown the poor are actually in this country, living and working.” according to Felini. BUT HOW?
Software spiders developed at University of Oxford can search the Internet for specific speech or comments made by public figures. The speech targeted will be concerning unemployment figures, job forecasts, job growth, etc. When the spiders locate the source it will be analyzed for content. If the content is the type to mislead, conceal poverty, offer glib moronic solutions, or act as propaganda for an organization or government, the speaker will be identified to the Bureau.
Under the new law, awaiting a final vote, any speaker who has been identified will automatically be subject to this penalty:
(Note: This material is the official wording and has not been altered for this report.)
Law 6759 Penalty Provision: The public figure speaker will have his or her daughter or son, of current working age, assigned to 20 years of working at the typical wage and typical job of the group the speaker spoke of. If no child is available, the speaker themselves will be required to take their place. If they refuse, the child or themselves can opt out by lethal injection to cause death within 1 hour. There will be no exceptions.
Official Example Number 1:
The President of the United States announces at a Press Conference “that 400,000 new jobs were created in the month of March.”
That statement is all that is needed to require her or his child to begin the sentence. In this case they would be required to begin work at a fast-food restaurant for minimum wage or a position at a retail store. Since the typical American works at a career where they can never rise above poverty, this type of job will be selected for them. If they refuse they will get to have the injection with their loved ones present.
So in this example the President’s daughter would be forced to live out her working life at a below living wage salary.
Official Example Number 2:
The President of the United States announces at a Press Conference “that 400,000 new jobs were created in the month of March. These jobs are crap that pay substandard wages and after taxes you will still need to visit a food pantry for help. Some or most are back-breaking and you should expect health problems for which you can’t afford medical care. Thank you. I have no further comment.”
In this second example the speaker would incur no penalty and his or her life can continue on as usual.
But we wondered about people like newscasters or reporters. Would they qualify under the new law?
“Yes. Any person who is known enough or can access millions of people is a person the spiders will watch, including so-called Bloggers.” said Dr. O. Saveyus of Oxford Institute.
“And I might add,” the Doctor said, “the penalty of lethal injection is not harsh as it first seems. You see lethal injection is a fast death and we now know that a lifetime of substandard wages is a slow death. So the penalty for one is the same as the other. It is just a question of how long death takes to occur.”
(Reporter’s note: laboratory rats have confirmed the Doctor’s comments. See Issue 7 of Consumer Death Magazine.)
Copyright © 2015 by R Felini
New Scientific Breakthrough to End Income Disparity
By INS Staff
“We now have the tool we need to end poverty.” according to Doctor Felini from the Bringham Order Of Brothers.
By combining technology with social psychology, scientists and lawmakers say they have a solution to a problem for most of the world. But the start will be in the United States.
“It is not necessary to travel to Africa to find poor people to experiment with,” says Dr. Felini, “we can find white, black and brown peoples living in total poverty right here in the good old US of A. For years we believed that everyone in America was doing fine and many rich Hollywood types were duped into traveling to foreign countries to find poor people suffering so they could help.”
Photo from security camera. Suspect identified by bystanders as “Scrooge”.
“But after extensive research funded by the taxpayer, studies have shown the poor are actually in this country, living and working.” according to Felini. BUT HOW?
Software spiders developed at University of Oxford can search the Internet for specific speech or comments made by public figures. The speech targeted will be concerning unemployment figures, job forecasts, job growth, etc. When the spiders locate the source it will be analyzed for content. If the content is the type to mislead, conceal poverty, offer glib moronic solutions, or act as propaganda for an organization or government, the speaker will be identified to the Bureau.
Under the new law, awaiting a final vote, any speaker who has been identified will automatically be subject to this penalty:
(Note: This material is the official wording and has not been altered for this report.)
Law 6759 Penalty Provision: The public figure speaker will have his or her daughter or son, of current working age, assigned to 20 years of working at the typical wage and typical job of the group the speaker spoke of. If no child is available, the speaker themselves will be required to take their place. If they refuse, the child or themselves can opt out by lethal injection to cause death within 1 hour. There will be no exceptions.
Official Example Number 1:
The President of the United States announces at a Press Conference “that 400,000 new jobs were created in the month of March.”
That statement is all that is needed to require her or his child to begin the sentence. In this case they would be required to begin work at a fast-food restaurant for minimum wage or a position at a retail store. Since the typical American works at a career where they can never rise above poverty, this type of job will be selected for them. If they refuse they will get to have the injection with their loved ones present.
So in this example the President’s daughter would be forced to live out her working life at a below living wage salary.
Official Example Number 2:
The President of the United States announces at a Press Conference “that 400,000 new jobs were created in the month of March. These jobs are crap that pay substandard wages and after taxes you will still need to visit a food pantry for help. Some or most are back-breaking and you should expect health problems for which you can’t afford medical care. Thank you. I have no further comment.”
In this second example the speaker would incur no penalty and his or her life can continue on as usual.
But we wondered about people like newscasters or reporters. Would they qualify under the new law?
“Yes. Any person who is known enough or can access millions of people is a person the spiders will watch, including so-called Bloggers.” said Dr. O. Saveyus of Oxford Institute.
“And I might add,” the Doctor said, “the penalty of lethal injection is not harsh as it first seems. You see lethal injection is a fast death and we now know that a lifetime of substandard wages is a slow death. So the penalty for one is the same as the other. It is just a question of how long death takes to occur.”
(Reporter’s note: laboratory rats have confirmed the Doctor’s comments. See Issue 7 of Consumer Death Magazine.)
Copyright © 2015 by R Felini
May 14, 2016
Desperate jobseekers! Don't jump! I can help your miserable life!
For those out of work, recently graduated from a college with a worthless degree or any unemployed person - this could be the idea you need. Think about substitute teaching.
My book is a hard hitting exploration of just the quick buck job you are seeking. Why be forced out on the street and end up dancing for overweight, beer breathing men or women at 78 cents a pop?
Yes I am selling the book! You think I like dancing for drunk pedophiles? Thanks and Happy Hunting!
How to Sub-Plement Your Income: A Guide to Becoming a Good Substitute Teacher
My book is a hard hitting exploration of just the quick buck job you are seeking. Why be forced out on the street and end up dancing for overweight, beer breathing men or women at 78 cents a pop?
Yes I am selling the book! You think I like dancing for drunk pedophiles? Thanks and Happy Hunting!
How to Sub-Plement Your Income: A Guide to Becoming a Good Substitute Teacher
October 30, 2015
True Grit: The Last Word by R Felini
For those of you who never read Westerns you may like to try True Grit by Charles Portis. It is an interesting way of presenting a story narrated by a girl who goes searching for the killer of her father in the West after the Civil War with the help of a broken down but not out, US Marshal.
True Grit
Now they made two movies based on the book. The first is 1969 starring John Wayne and it is missing a lot of things that made the book enjoyable. It totally changed the Portis ending for a sappy one. It also has been disneyed up in other areas also. It is an enjoyable flick but I believe the remake by the Coen Brothers in 2010 was much better and truer to the book.
It starred Jeff Bridges, Matt Damon, and Hailee Steinfeld as the young girl. Seldom is a remake better than the original but this time it is and it does not screw up good parts of the book either.
www.feliniworld.wordpress.com
True Grit
Now they made two movies based on the book. The first is 1969 starring John Wayne and it is missing a lot of things that made the book enjoyable. It totally changed the Portis ending for a sappy one. It also has been disneyed up in other areas also. It is an enjoyable flick but I believe the remake by the Coen Brothers in 2010 was much better and truer to the book.
It starred Jeff Bridges, Matt Damon, and Hailee Steinfeld as the young girl. Seldom is a remake better than the original but this time it is and it does not screw up good parts of the book either.
www.feliniworld.wordpress.com
December 10, 2014
Attention Police: Best way to kill 12 year olds.
Is there a good method of killing 12 year mental cases in the park? Yes.
Shoot 'em in the head or to the left of center mass, upper quadrant.
But if they are just mental cases pointing toy guns at people in the park - is there another way? Yes.
When you arrive on the scene with an unknown perp with weapon and no report of shots fired or injuries, you can take up a defensive position out of pistol range and use amplified voice to engage the target while observing his or her actions. Keep your distance maximized so reaction time is optimal.
Do not - I repeat - Do not take the life of an American citizen without trying lesser means. We can always get the punk later and beat him up.
Of course this is meant for well to do white children. If they are poor or ethnic you might as well end the poor bastard's life.
Thanks and good hunting!
R Felini
Shoot 'em in the head or to the left of center mass, upper quadrant.
But if they are just mental cases pointing toy guns at people in the park - is there another way? Yes.
When you arrive on the scene with an unknown perp with weapon and no report of shots fired or injuries, you can take up a defensive position out of pistol range and use amplified voice to engage the target while observing his or her actions. Keep your distance maximized so reaction time is optimal.
Do not - I repeat - Do not take the life of an American citizen without trying lesser means. We can always get the punk later and beat him up.
Of course this is meant for well to do white children. If they are poor or ethnic you might as well end the poor bastard's life.
Thanks and good hunting!
R Felini
February 1, 2014
Democracy & attack dogs don't mix.
I wonder if anyone has noticed that everywhere you look these days armed individuals are showing up whenever peaceful citizens gather to protest basic rights in their society.
No free society can tolerate the threat of violence to quell free speech rights. But if you go out to speak about wage inequality, the local government has riot police in helmets and horses and cameras and dogs to greet you. The message is to try and instill fear in the protesters.
Shouldn't the government be afraid of us?
No free society can tolerate the threat of violence to quell free speech rights. But if you go out to speak about wage inequality, the local government has riot police in helmets and horses and cameras and dogs to greet you. The message is to try and instill fear in the protesters.
Shouldn't the government be afraid of us?
December 31, 2013
How to waste your life by details.
I just saw an ad for a "fitness" band you evidently wear around your wrist so you can tell if you are exercising or not. It also monitors your sleep and tells you how much you got or not.
You know whether you are exercising or not. You also can look at a clock before you go to sleep. But some will be fooled into adding this layer of decision making to their lives.
Decisions take time. To decide to buy it, to decide where to buy it, to shop for this device, to read the manual or software, to use it, to shop for batteries for it, to protect it, and to store it.
But how about this? Ignore it and save your decision energy. If you wonder where your time and life is going - check your decisions others are asking you to make daily.
You know whether you are exercising or not. You also can look at a clock before you go to sleep. But some will be fooled into adding this layer of decision making to their lives.
Decisions take time. To decide to buy it, to decide where to buy it, to shop for this device, to read the manual or software, to use it, to shop for batteries for it, to protect it, and to store it.
But how about this? Ignore it and save your decision energy. If you wonder where your time and life is going - check your decisions others are asking you to make daily.
