Susan Thatcher's Blog, page 19
August 15, 2013
Live and Learn. The Hard Way.
I like cats and dogs. I treat them respectfully. I have the scars on my arms and hands to show the learning process.
That scar’s over here somewhere…
I also have scars from falling off bikes, skates, skis, and a bunk bed.
What can I say? I learn the hard way.
If a first-time author is fortunate enough to work with a publisher (And I’m thinking Random House, Penguin, St. Martin’s Press, etc. They should go with “E Pluribus Unum” as a slogan because that’s the way we’re headed), the publisher takes care of things like editing, proof-reading, typesetting, art, marketing and distribution.
And if one is not fortunate enough to work with a publisher…
Say it with me…”Susan’s gonna do it the hard way.”
Actually, I’ve known better than to try this. Even after consuming tequila.
So I find myself with a book (ONE BOOK. Please keep that in mind. I started with 1 book), no experienced publisher to guide me through the process and a world of self-publishing possibilities.
Also working against me…
“Patience” is just a word in a dictionary
Yes, this is a Tarot card image. Don’t wig out.
Once the pieces are on the table (so to speak), I see no reason to wait. The family motto, “When All Else Fails, Read the Directions.”
It was suggested to me (by someone with far more knowledge and experience than I) that trilogies are what sell (Or at least a series). I think we can blame this one on George Lucas and the REAL Star Wars movies: Star Wars, Empire Strikes Back and Return of the Jedi (I’m ignoring the numbering. And Jar Jar Binks). He started it and everyone jumped on the bandwagon, even in books. “Hunger Games,” “50 Shades,” etc. (Yes, I know Harry Potter was 7 books and Twilight was 4). My book was “These Foolish Things.” I had (and have) no desire to continue past the current ending. I would go back and writing a prequel and I will happily debate with any book club or audience who wants to discuss it. This is the Age of the Franchise.
I have one book. One. 417 pages in Word.
I’ll divide it up! Figure out a logical stopping place in the story and divide it. I’ll have two books of about 200 pages. Hey! Problem solved!
Not so much.
With my editor, we figured out (in terms of the story) what as the best place to divide. Done.
Minor problem: the original version of the book (as written 12 years ago) had a Prologue. Um. Oh, boy.
Solution: 
Um…
Right: split off the Prologue and use it for marketing purposes. However 1) I can’t offer something for free continuously on Amazon. And it needs a separate ISBN AND cover art AND….
Ay yi yi.
I went ahead, found a picture (And I took it myself. Prince of Peace Church in Woodland Hills has a labyrinth and a lovely rose garden. That’s where the picture came from) and using Microsoft Paint (don’t judge me), I made a “cover.”
Lesson learned: if you are not versed in art or graphic design, get someone one who is. This is part of the first impression and we are visual creatures.
Okay, so we have a divided book. First section is uploaded to Amazon’s Create Space, I have nice cover art (note for future reference that there is no lettering on the spine). According to Create Space, at a 6″ x 9″ book size, this works out to 205 pages. Well cool, thinks I, that means I’ll have another acceptably-sized book when we get to launch At Last (as I decided to name the split-off section). As a Word document, it’s 118 pages. I should be fine.
Not so much.
To my shock and dismay, At Last, as a 6″ x 9″ book is only 78 pages. That’s right: 78 pages.
Lesson learned: Do some research. Find out how your 8.5′ x 11″ manuscript will translate into an e-book (page numbers will vary) and how it will translate into an actual book. And simply dividing an existing manuscript, even if it works within the story, may create more problems than it solves. You want to write a trilogy? WRITE a flippin’ trilogy.
I have my story. I have cover art. I can plunge ahead (See the Knight of Swords) just load the thing into Amazon’s Kindle self-publishing and make an annoucement on Facebook and Twitter (with a link) and we’re off to the races.
No.
Even a garage sale does better with some promotion (a notice in the Pennysaver, a sign nailed to a power pole a few days beforehand). And now that These Foolish Things is out and available, NOW I’m learning about marketing blitzes and creating buzz before launching (“Where’s the marketing adviser?” you ask. She was busy and I am DUMB enough to think that I’m SMART enough to figure this out and be successful without knowing what I’m doing. I relied too much on beginner’s luck).
NOW I subscribe to various blogs about marketing using social media and how to create buzz before you launch a product (It’s a book, but it’s also a product). My sincere apology to the author I copped this from: I don’t remember where I saw it. It was probably your blog. If you’d like to take credit and throw a link into the comments, please do. At Last is THIS CLOSE to having cover art. I will recruit friends on Facebook and Twitter to help me publicize by posting a picture on their feeds. Some of my friends have substantial Facebook followings and when they posted information about the free giveaways I did through Amazon Select, the first day had 669 downloads and the second day (just complete) had 512. That’s 1100 people who have MY BOOK in their hands because my friends said, “Hey, check this out.”
Lesson learned: It’s not Fire, Aim, Ready for a reason. Get the publicity going FIRST. People like to be ahead of the crowd, in the know and in on a little secret.
Right. I didn’t read this book until AFTER I launched.
I’ve also been reading up on blog tours! Yes! Recruiting others to help promote your book…Before. You. Launch.
The unlettered spine: Vroman’s is an independent bookstore in Pasadena. They will take books on conisgnment. Hey! I have a book they can take on consignment! Except: unless the book is too thin (I need to go back and look at their guidelines again), they require the title on the spine.
Live and learn. Live and learn.
So what have I learned? We’ll let Edna Mode from “The Incredibles” have the last word:
Fortune favors the prepared, Dahling.
August 12, 2013
Free Kindle Downloads!!! Free is Good, Free is Wonderful, We All Like Free!
I do not actually own Larry and Irving bobbleheads
If you live in any jurisdiction served by Sit & Sleep, you know the Larry and Irving radio ads (unless you listen exclusively to Sirius). “Freeeeee!” and “you’re killing me, Larry!” are familiar taglines. And annoying ones, frankly.
Well, I’m going to borrow a page from Larry and Irving. While I’m not selling mattresses (and by the way, Larry, I’ve seen places that routinely undersell you), I am selling books. My books. Got a Kindle? Great! No Kindle? Surely, you have a device (Computer, tablet, smartphone) that supports Kindle software. No? Well, then you’ll have to join Goodreads and cross your fingers for a free paperback (These Foolish Things is available in a Goodreads giveaway. There are 10 autographed copies up for grabs, 268 people have opted in, so the odds are pretty good right now).
Anyway,
And…
Hot Links!!!!
These Foolish Things will be available again as a free Kindle download for one day only, tomorrow, August 13, 2013. The Prologue will be available as a free download for two days, August 13 and 14.
Unlike your local Toyota dealer, I am not making room for the 2014 models. Invoking another Los Angeles advertising icon (or annoyance):
Cal Worthington and his dog Spot
I like Spot. I’d like Spot to go Siegfried and Roy on him.
The previous free download day was a success and put my book (My. Book. I have to get used to the idea that “Someday, people will be reading my book” has arrived. Holy Cow) into a lot of new hands. Let’s put it into a few more.
Spread the word:
The dates:
These Foolish Things: Free Kindle Download August 13, 2013
The Prologue to These Foolish Things: Free Kindle Download August 13 and 14, 2013
Got your copy? If you liked it well enough, please share the hell out of this message.
Tell your friends!
August 8, 2013
Okay, Readers, It’s Time for You to Talk Back…
I’m presuming there are a few of you out there who have read These Foolish Things (my FIRST book. More coming. I promise).
So, I want to know from YOU (and why, if you feel like it): Who would you cast in the movie?
Liz Gardner:
Take Our Poll
Ty Hadley:
Take Our Poll
Angie DiNardo:
Take Our Poll
Don’t like my choices? Let me hear from you in the comments section. C’mon: talk back to me.
August 5, 2013
Giveaway on Goodreads!! FREE BOOK!!!
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Goodreads Book Giveaway
These Foolish Things
by Susan Thatcher
Giveaway ends September 04, 2013.
See the giveaway details
at Goodreads.
Hey! Want a FREE AUTOGRAPHED COPY of “These Foolish Things”? Are ya on Goodreads?
YOU CAN WIN AN AUTOGRAPHED COPY!!! Yeah! Free is great; autographed is better!
I am giving away 10 autographed copies of “These Foolish Things” through the Goodreads Giveaway program. It’s a random draw; you just have to enter.
The giveaway ends September 4, 2013, so get over there and enter!
Click on that there link at the top and good luck!!!!
Go for It
Lily Tomlin had a joke in her routine that went something like “What if we all grew up to be what we wanted? Can you imagine a world full of astronauts, ballerinas, and firemen?”
The corollary to that are the people who say, “Someday, I’m going to…”
“…travel to Greece.”
“…start my own business.”
“…write a novel.” (Okay, yeah, I did that, but how often do you hear people say they want to do that?)
The trouble with “someday” is how seldom it becomes “today.” Okay, maybe you can’t travel to Greece at the drop of a hat, but you can find out how much it would cost or figure out which islands you want to visit. Start your own business? I have a friend who has been writing and rewriting a business plan for years (and working some impressive jobs in the meantime that will serve her ultimate goal in terms of knowledge gained).
Want to write a novel (or non-fiction book)? Start.
At one point, I had a commute from Concord, NH to Boston, MA (according to Google Maps, the distance from one bus station to the other is 68.2 miles and 1 hour 7 minutes. That’s now; back then the Big Dig was in full swing. Add an hour. I mean it). Being a smart person (which doesn’t stop me from doing some stupid things, by the way), I took the bus back and forth (why drive when you can ride?). We had a group of regulars who nodded to each other, smiled, and exchanged small talk.
I had had an idea for a novel brewing in the back of my mind for a while. My thought process was something like “‘Titanic.’ Please. They knew each other all of what, 48 hours? And then he DIED? She went on to have a full life with someone else! Fer Chrissake, that’s her GRANDDAUGHTER with her! She didn’t exactly check into a nunnery after Jack died!” I was thinking along the lines of “Okay, so they meet, they fall in love. Then what? Why isn’t there enough drama in making it work?”
I was also thinking along the lines of “Why doesn’t anyone explore the other end of a relationship?” (Kids, leave the room. It’s about to get Russian in here) All relationships end, either by choice or by death. It’s the truth. “Someday, I’m going to write a book where someone has to decide whether to end her beloved’s life.”
I daydreamed about scenes that I would write. My process: I watch a movie in my head and then translate it into words. (Until the characters take over and then it’s just typing what they tell me to do). Of course, I’d be typing this up “someday.” I had a computer at home and this was in the pre-IPad and pre-smartphone days. And I had this 2.5 to 3 hour commute…
Then I thought about it…
I had a pen. I always have a pen. There was a CVS between my place of work in Winthrop Square and South Station. Surely, they would have notebooks. I could write in a notebook. I knew how to do that;something they used to teach in public grade school. Way back in the 60s and 70s.
So, “Someday” became a day in December 2000.
When will your “Someday” be?
August 1, 2013
What Do Muhammed Ali and a Kid’s Toy Have in Common?
Remember these?
Sorry, Bozo
For those of you born during the electronic era, those of us had fewer toys made of pixels and more made of things like aluminum and latex. Instead of pushing buttons, we had to assemble things (that was the purpose of the toy. Seriously; Legos are not meant as a low tech security system that immobilizes intruders with unspeakable pain when they step on them), paint, draw, color with actual brushes, pencils and crayons (If you had a family dog, chances are Fido would get hold of them and the yard would be strewn with rainbow-studded dog poop. We thought “So this is what a unicorn leaves behind.” Unicorns poop rainbows. Look it up) and sometimes blow up a toy before you could actually play with it. The above toy was inflatable, the bottom was weighted with sand and (once inflated. That’s what dads are for) you could hit it with the punch you wanted to land in your little brother’s face (Admit it, you wanted to), but couldn’t because Mom and Dad would have spanked you until you bottom smoked. “You want to get corporal? I’ll show you corporal!” (Heard that one a few times)) and it would fall back, but then it bobbed right back up. I could go into centers of gravity and explain that stuff. I could if I had studied Physics, but I didn’t so I won’t. The point is: No matter how much of a beating you put on the clown, it would come back up (provided you didn’t puncture it, but that’s where duct tape comes in).
It’s a useful skill for human beings.
Unless you’re extraordinarily lucky, things are going to happen in life that will knock you down: accidents, breakups, financial distress (that’s been a lot more common in the past 5 years), unexpected events, illness (yours or a loved one’s), losses. You will get knocked down. But will you stay down?
I’ve read Gone With the Wind a few times, not because I love Scarlett O’Hara so much; she was a selfish, conniving, racist bitch. (I like Rhett much better. Conniving, racist son of a bitch, but he had a heart). However, the Civil War knocked Scarlett’s easy life out from under her. As much as she wanted someone else to fix things, she didn’t have the luxury. Rather than just lying down and dying, Scarlett rolled up her sleeves, bullied her sisters and the remaining freed slaves into doing the hard physical labor necessary to survive and to hold onto her home (even though her means of doing that are probably not a shining example: she stole her sister’s fiance, forced him into behaving like a merchant instead of a gentleman, talked him into buying a lumber mill to take advantage of the post-war building boom and…read the book). Scarlett got back on her feet and kept on going.
She chose to keep going. The book painted a lot of the minor characters that she encountered in Clayton County or in Atlanta as choosing to stay down rather than change their ways to survive and thrive. They accepted poverty rather than turn their hands to physical labor or actually getting a job (trust fund babies) because to do those things was “common” or “ungentlemanly or unladylike.”
Scarlett was the boppy clown.
Muhammed Ali
Neitzsche said, “That which doesn’t kill me, makes me stronger.”
I’m not referring to things like “I didn’t get an A on my paper” or “the cable was out all last week” or “my wedding is ruined because the caterer overcooked the salmon” (I have confessed to watching “Bridezillas.” Good God, those women need some perspective. Throw them into the Total Perspective Vortex – see “The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy”). I’m talking about “I lost my job,” “I lost my house,” or “My spouse left me with our kids and cleaned out the bank account.” Those kinds of challenges can knock you down and out.
In Elizabeth Gardner in These Foolish Things, At Last (coming soon), and The Baldie Chronicles (coming later than At Last), I wanted to create a character who could weather the storms without the nastiness of Scarlett (and no, she’s not based on Scarlett. Or Elizabeth Bennett from Pride and Prejudice). Someone who might get driven to her knees, but would find it within herself to rise again and keep going. I am a New England native. (I’ve lived in 3 of the 6 New England states. I self-identify as a Vermonter. I lived there longer than I did in either New Hampshire or Massachusetts and Vermont is a really cool state. Just too cold for me in the winter) Resilience is in our DNA. I’m a Mayflower descendant and if those ancestors hadn’t come back after that killer first winter, I wouldn’t be here or I would be a completely different person. (Yes, those of you who said, “Well, there would have been a lot more Native Americans,” I hear you. I’m also descended from the Lenape tribe of New Jersey. So where half of my ancestors were giving thanks for landing at Plymouth, another group was onshore saying, “There goes the neighborhood.”) I wanted that “must do” spirit to be a part of Liz.
Unfortunately, the generation is rapidly dying out, but our grandparents (or great-grandparents) survived The Great Depression, dealt with the challenges thrown at them and made it out the other side. We may not know all the stories (and there may be one or two that Grandma took to her grave), but we are here because someone chose to get back up on their feet.
And to close, I’d like to share a spin on Nietzsche with which I agree:
July 29, 2013
The Post With Cat Hair in It
Actually, they all have cat hair in them. I live with a cat (he’s not mine, but he likes me). He’s an independent fellow, indoor/outdoor guy, not much of a lap addict. Hell, he doesn’t even like catnip.
Yes, this is Exhibit A: the Hummingbird Hunter
(the hummingbirds are now safe. The feeders were moved to a new location. He can watch; can’t touch)
However, he hears the computer booting up or the keyboard clicking and suddenly, my desktop becomes his very favorite place in the world.
Cat happiness is keeping a human from non-cat centered activities.
I have Microsoft Arc wireless keyboard and mouse. Exhibit A likes to sit on the keyboard. If we are chatting online and you get a weird burst of characters from me; chances are he sent it. As for the mouse, I frequently have to reach between his legs or around his stripey orange butt to use it.
Last night, I was on a writing hot streak (If you have read or are reading These Foolish Things, I am hard at work on the prequel. And having seen the compression factor by Create Space squish a digital Word file of 417 pages to actual book format of 278 pages, if you guys want something substantial, don’t hold your breath. This is going to take a while). Anyway, I had to periodically pick up my keyboard and wait while His Majesty did his kingly desk sprawl (see above). I thought I’d gotten clever at one point by sitting at the desk and giving him the clear space on the desktop by using my lap desk to rest the keyboard. Suddenly, that became the more desirable real estate. Cats and real estate agents: Location, location, location.
This also applies to home computing
Somewhere along the line, maybe during all the hours they sleep, feline internal software got a new version or a patch or an upgrade and they are now programmed to seek out the space between the human being and the computer screen especially if the human is trying to do something. That has to be the answer; Mr. Independent here couldn’t be buggered unless I am focused on what I’m doing. And then, his attitude becomes “You know, we don’t spend real quality time together.” (And right now, I am working around cat butt, head rubs that mash my hands into the keyboard and DON’T CHEW ON THOSE WIRES! DAMMIT! YOU ARE NOT A PET RABBIT!!!!)
I took this picture 30 seconds ago. That’s this blog post on the right.
The dog, God bless him, is normally a Velcro animal, very emotionally needy and doesn’t handle high def TV all that well (He will bark-at dogs, horses, camels, 70 year old still photos of cattle from a Ken Burns documentary and last week, people moving sand from an archaeological dig in Egypt. You heard me; he barks at sand). He will quietly lie on the rug gnawing on his toys or snoozing (when not growling and woofing at horses in a John Wayne movie). He doesn’t insist on getting in my lap, on the desk or under my feet (if he did, Exhibit A would punch him in the face for stealing his act. I’ve seen it).
Background: The Dog’s Bandanna.
Foreground: The Dog’s Banana (seriously. It has a mustache).
When I wrote my first book, I was sharing my home with 4 cats:
George ,Toulouse, Cookie, and Samba.
Sammy Cat hated everyone else. That’s why she’s on the other side of the bed.
I did not have the “let’s get on the desk and drive her nuts” action that I have going now. Cookie (the Blue Point Crab), would get on a corner of my desk and sit next to the monitor while I worked, but she didn’t interfere. The boys would be on the floor either rolling around chewing on each other or just lying with bellies up in the breeze from the fan. (SamCat would lie on the futon and just glare at everyone else. As far as she was concerned, they were a bunch of dopes) I would stay up late at night typing away and listening to Sandra Harris on WHOM 94.9. If I got up to get a drink of water or use the bathroom, I would have a furry escort trying to get me to go to bed. I could almost hear little annoyed sighs when I turned around and went back to work (face palms would have been muffled by fur). Some time between midnight and 1 AM, they’d just give up and go to bed without me. As you can see from the photo, they made sure there was little or no room for me. They snoozed, I losed. Lost.
But those were the cat models of a decade ago. Like I said, the current models have gotten a software patch that better guides interference. Technology doesn’t sit still.
Mark Twain was a great fan of cats, having a sizable clowder (technical term for a group of cats. Mine preferred to be known as a pride). I’d be willing to bet that Beelzebub, Sour Mash, Blatherskite and Zoroaster tried to “help” him write (The Adventures of Tom Sawyer was the first novel written completely on a typewriter. I’m sure there was a lot of batting at the keys and the ribbon going on. And probably some choice words from Mr. Twain).
And I’d be willing to bet that he turned in a few manuscripts laced with cat hair.
July 26, 2013
What SHARKNADO Can Teach Us About Writing
Reblogged from Kristen Lamb's Blog:
SHARKNADO is a phenomena that is taking the world by storm. I mean, how can it get better? SHARKS AND TORNADOES! Tonight, SyFy is re-airing the show and we will be holding a #myWANA #Sharknado party on Twitter so we can all share in the goofy fun, because sometimes stories are so BAD they are AWESOME.
But what can writers learn from Sharknado?
I am sharing this because it has valuable information and (ahem. Cough) I want to win something. But the advise is REALLY good.
July 25, 2013
Brick Wall in the Rear View Mirror
“The brick walls are there for a reason. The brick walls are not there to keep us out. The brick walls are there to give us a chance to show how badly we want something. Because the brick walls are there to stop the people who don’t want it badly enough. They’re there to stop the other people.”
Randy Pausch, “The Last Lecture”
12 years in the making
(It’s a selfie. I’m not a fan of them, but…)
See that picture? There’s an invisible brick wall in the background.
I had significant help and support getting here (Diane, Sue, Chris, Aileen). Thank you, Guys, for helping me get past the brick wall.
July 22, 2013
How I Did It (For those who ask “How’d you do it?”)
(This is MY blog. I get to gaze at my own navel every now and then. And yes, I can see it when I want to. Without a mirror)
So, the paperback version of These Foolish Things (trying to remember proper grammar and punctuation. If I remember rightly, you’re supposed to underline book titles) is now available through Amazon.
This is after 12 years of rejection by publishers and literary agents (“We don’t know how to market it” ). I’m attaching a link to a CNN.com story about an author who re-typed a National Book Award winner, submitted it to 14 publishers (including the one who published it and the literary agent who represented it)…and they all rejected it. (This was in response to “The Cuckoo’s Call” author being unveiled as J.K. Rowling)
Bob Greene, Better Story than JK Rowling.
For most of that time, an author had one of two choices: submit something through the tradition publishing houses and hope it was accepted or pay for self-publishing through a vanity press.
Once upon a time, there were a lot of book publishers.They would compete with each other for titles, hoping investing in an author would pay off with handsome sales. The investment would include professional editing, layout and printing, jacket design and marketing/distribution. If they thought the author had hits in him/her, they would pay advances (and the Stephen King/Tom Clancy/Mary Higgins Clark kind of authors would get multi-million dollar ones). It was possible for a great novel such as Ordinary People to be pulled from the “slush pile” (unsolicited manuscripts) and published.
However, the great herd of publishing houses was thinned by mergers. And they became more cautious about who was let through the gates into Publishing Paradise. At first, they wanted only manuscripts from literary agents (who also became cautious), then only certain literary agents, then only authors with proven track records.
They still exists, but it’s like the wild buffalo of the United States: gone from a herd of millions down to the ones living in Yellowstone and those guys are in danger of getting shot if they wander into Montana. And their output is substantially reduced.
The other “Old Timey” means of getting a story from your ink-stained fingers (well, with the advent of computers, more like Doritos and Red Bull. My thing is coffee) was to go to a vanity press where YOU paid for all the services (instead of the publisher) and it was up to YOU to get the things sold. For every “Christmas Box” (the first self-published book to reach #1 on the New York Times bestseller list) there are thousands of people with boxes of unread books stashed in garages, basements and attics.
This is the quick and dirty version of the story:
And for every story of his, there are the vast army of Roger Sterlings (“Mad Men”) whose gamble on self-publication goes nowhere. A recent episode showed Roger pulling copies out of his briefcase and tossing them. He couldn’t even give them away.
Self-publishing was an expensive option and up until the early part of the 21st century, the “most affordable” packages were still pretty expensive and included all the services provided by a full-service house, but the author paid the costs. This is a link to Xlibris, a Print On Demand house still in business. See the cost of the top package? $15,249. I don’t have that kind of dough.
However, technology doesn’t stand still.
Now, through services such as Kindle Direct Publishing, Smashwords and Bookbaby, an author can publish his magnum opus (NOT Tom Selleck crossed with a penguin) without it costing an arm and a leg.
Get it? Magnum Opus?
Through Amazon’s Create Space, you can publish a paperback for free (of course, like a nail salon, they try to upsell you at every turn (I opted for $25 for additional distribution channels, did not go in for the cover design, etc. BUT COVER ART IS VERY IMPORTANT).
I have my first paperback order and I find this very exciting. I’m sitting here, 12 years down the road from something that started as disjointed chapters written in a grade school composition book …
(Seriously: I write in these things. No worries about battery life)
…to an actual “hold it in your hands, dog-ear the pages and spill wine on it” book. I am expecting great things of it (I have the mindset of a 6 year old in that “this will be the greatest ____ ever.”) . But my main point in telling this story is to show that it is possible to to get published despite the barriers.
That’s how I did it.
