Ailsa Abraham's Blog: Ailsa Abraham, page 53

Otter to Fox!

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Hi Gang!

Ten days without internet has been an eye-opener but good for me. Of course I missed my on-line family very much but I was with my same-litter peoples for the last week so that was brills.

This may take several blogs to cover but here goes Number One. I started out in London at a Mozilla Firefox conference to which I had been invited as a volunteer. Yes, I know, Mrs. Numpty-at-Pooters is the last person you’d invite but they said I was “good with people” so off I went, despite still being slightly dead from the motorbike accident.

A wheelchair had been hired for me and that was a real eye-opener! I learned a lot from that and although I have never been unkind or ignorant to disabled people, I will in future make more effort to lend a paw. I couldn’t believe the treatment I got in London. Folks appeared to be trying to walk up my lap and getting tetchy because I was slow.

One particularly unpleasant individual was told “Sorry, mate, Kick a Cripple Week is past. Have to wait til next year!” which made him go a funny colour and harumph at me. Another who was tutting and tsking at me got my front wheel in his ankle as I deliberately spun around to apologise. Insult the otter at your peril, public.

The event was great if exhausting and I bombed up and down on my wheels. Nobody asked me difficult questions and I got a technique of saying “I don’t know but I’ll find someone who does, follow me!” then barrelling off, chatting to my visitors and making them laugh.

Biggest laugh was my “reversing vehicle” impression which I did when coming backwards out of lifts. Beep, beep, beep, otter warning!

A big hello and thank you to all the Mozilla folk who made me feel part of the tribe instantly and found things I could do sitting down. Also to the security guys who were unfailingly charming when I had to ask them to open the disabled access so I could nip outside for a smoke.

It also caused a few raised eyebrows when I had to get out of my chair and skip about as my back locked when kept in one position – it’s a Mozilla miracle!

Would you believe that stuck there in that morass of computer genius I couldn’t get on-line??? Apparently I did OK cos I’ve heard they’ve got me on the list for next year. Perhaps by then I’ll be 100% and not “caution, danger, otter on wheels!”

More about the rest of my trip later.

Way out…

WARNING  – Possible trigger subject. 

Delicate subject but as we are just out of Mental Health Awareness Week and I have first hand experience I thought we might chat about suicide. Why? Well, many of you will never have had a chance to speak to someone who has tried it out. I do hope so. Perhaps you have views or wanted to ask questions.  Let’s sort some of the “accepted wisdom” out.

The most selfish thing you can do. Maybe. Given that anyone who wants to kill themself is not in a good mental state, it is unfair to judge them by “normal” standards. Running away and abandoning one’s family in times of trouble most certainly IS.

Depending on the circumstances, most suicides are not trying to get away from their family and friends – they are desperately trying to get away from their major problem, themselves. Given their state of mind, it is hardly surprising that the person has become totally self-absorbed. Consideration for others, even the person finding their body, doesn’t cross their mind. If the person is suffering from a mental health condition like severe clinical depression, bipolar etc, it is like harbouring a possessive demon. It really does take over one’s life.

It’s a cry for help.  Yes, very often. It’s the most efficient way of saying “I’ve had enough and I can’ take any more”. It depends though whether it was a “real” attempt or a “safe option” where they know someone will find them before death.

They must be mad. That’s not a word that psychiatrists approve of but, in the general run of thing, yes. What we, on the outside, can’t judge is what has put them in that state. Is it an illness? Is their home life so vile that really they would be “better off dead”. Are they hooked on something that is destroying them anyway?

Do you regret it? Yes, of course I do. I put my family and friends through some awful times and now I’m better I can look back and regret. That, however, is a very negative reaction. Better to look back and learn. Value my life as it is and thank every deity and star in the sky that I didn’t succeed. I got turned back at the gate.

So – if anyone reading this ever wanted to ask questions on the subject – go ahead, I’m happy to answer.

Don’t shoot me, I’m fine now!

 

 

Selling ice cream, writing and the ideal man- In which I interview Ailsa Abraham

Selling ice cream, writing and the ideal man- In which I interview Ailsa Abraham.

In which I visit Vivienne

… ‘LOOKING FOR A REASON’..? …then seek no further… my Guest Blogger today is great Authoress, Frances di Plino…enjoy!…

… ‘LOOKING FOR A REASON’..? …then seek no further… my Guest Blogger today is great Authoress, Frances di Plino…enjoy!…. Two of my best pals – Seumas and Frances are chatting to day on his blog!

Midlife???

If I say “midlife crisis”, what do you imagine. Think about it.

Probably most of you are imagining a guy in his late forties with kids grown up, doing well in his career who goes back to the passions of his youth and can now indulge himself with a Harley Davidson motorcycle or a sports car. Even trade the wife in for a younger, more glamorous model.

Male, see?

Mid-life, see?

Well I realised that I’ve been having a mid-life crisis for about the last twenty years! The accident on my own (respectably small) motorcycle brought it home to me.

Unless I plan to live to be 116 years old, I am not mid-life. I am, as we would say around here, “third age”. For goodness sake I will be an OAP in a couple of years!

So perhaps the smash was the boot up the backside that I needed to “put away childish thing” and start acting my age … just a bit.

No, it’s OK. I have no intention of growing up. I just have to admit when my multiple brain-whacks have taken their toll and I no longer have the balancing skills to do some of the teenaged things I used to love.

I never got as far as the Harley, sports car or toy boy (thanks be cos I couldn’t keep up these days!) but I think I will be limiting myself to my little van in future.

Always was a bit unsure about gender stereotyping!

Would prefer one of these though!

…my incomparable Author compadress, Ailsa Abraham, adorns my blog today…enjoy…

…my incomparable Author compadress, Ailsa Abraham, adorns my blog today…enjoy….

The wonderful Seumas Gallagher invited me over as part of my post-accident occupational therapy. Bless you, Sir, you are a total gentleman! xxx

Netiquette

As an author I spend a lot of time on FB and Twitter. Not only does it help me make friends with my readers, I’m a sociable sort who lives in a rather isolated spot.

However…over the past few months I’ve become rather fed up with the rudeness and uncivilized behaviour of some folks. I think my next publication should be “Netiquette – Social Media for Beginners”. I am sure such a book exists but many people haven’t read it.

I know I bang on about manners but if one treats social media as one would any gathering where there are invitees you know and total strangers, there isn’t a problem. You have something to sell? So do I, but I don’t just march up to folks I don’t know and say “See this!” while shoving my book up their nose. No sale, Mrs. Abraham.

Similarly it seems obvious to me that it is not polite to barge into someone else’s conversation and immediately start selling your product. Asking the host’s permission before showing off your wares would seem normal to me. Amongst some of us, we always share each other’s posts, it’s a bit of friendly help. Try that instead. You’ll get a lot further.

If someone makes a remark that you don’t like, complain to them, not the person on whose timeline the conversation happened! And for goodness sake stop “running to mummy” (complaining to FB) if you are rude to someone and they are nettled enough to use a slightly naughty word back at you.

If you are an author, you are in the hard world of publishing and marketing, so being precious and complaining all the time won’t make you any friends. Guess what? Those people have friends too, and word of mouth is the finest advertising – for good or ill.

We all make mistakes. The trick is to learn from them. Or perhaps I really ought to write that book!

Otter’s dam

I’m writing this for my friend Awen Thornber,

She is another scribbler on a similar path so we put our heads together and came up with this little tale about writer’s block.

Otter’s dam

I told you in a previous tale how Otter became a bard but in the last year or so, what with nearly losing her mate during the floods, rearing her pups and generally rescuing every stray animal in the riverside area, she had not made up any tales in a long time. The less she practiced her art, the less she felt up to doing it. A lethargy took over that was a form of “false busy-ness”.

Everyone knows that crows (in fact most corvids) are the wise ones but don’t tell the owls who think that is their job and get hopping mad. In so many tales of creation Crow or his family helped Spirit to shape the world or acted as guide and messenger between them. In one tale a Chief God had two ravens as his best helpers.

Otter was always polite to everyone but she had a special bond with Crow, who had been touched by Spirit. Autumn had come, the leaves were falling off the trees and Crow looked as if she were joining them. Her feathers were out of place and her beak covered in dust. She perched disconsolately on a branch above otter’s holt.

“Wanna sing, Crow?”

“No.”

“Going to be Samhain soon. What will you do for the ritual.”

“Nothing, Otter. My mind is blacker than my wings.”

“Like a dam in a river you mean?” Otter squeaked. “I have that. it’s like my story telling is a stream and sometimes a log falls across it and nothing gets past!”

“Yes, stones, not snails!” agreed Crow.

“Bugger, innit?” Otter observed.

Crow shook herself until her feathers rattled and clacked her beak experimentally a few times, then she launched into a song, extemporising what she had seen, where she had been and everything that had happened since she last saw her friend.

Otter was entranced and stood on her hind legs to pick up the croaky, harsh melody. Then she joined in, adding her own words, All the fear, joy and frustration of being a mate and mother came tumbling out in harmony with Crow’s song.

“Bust your dam, there, Otter,” Crow croaked and then winked before taking off.

IMPS AND SUCHLIKE

It’s mayhem in the Bingergread Cottage today. As I have mentioned, amongst other paths I have followed the shamanic one, rather like Riga in my novels, so I tend to pick up spirits. Like any other friend (or enemy) these can be permanent or temporary and adopt different forms. Maybe I choose to see them like that…who knows?

Also, being an author, my characters live in our house with us. Yes, all the time. At the moment, because we watched a TV show last night I have Cameron Lawton’s character Jack, having a bitch-slapping contest with Iamo over whose book is next in line. Iamo won’t hit Jack because he is gay and therefore to be shown respect as a woman (these things matter in his lineage) and Jack won’t hit Iamo because he is a priest. So proper punches are not being exchanged but voices are getting raised.

Riga is lying on the floor in fits of hysterical laughter in-between offering her pipe of dream weed to Jack’s partner, Rory who would just like them to shut up so he can enjoy a quiet scotch. Badger, my own partner, is blissfully unaware of all this.

Then there are my imps. I tend to have slightly bad imps but helpful ones. Ali the Djinn who came from Sudan to live with us, I’ve mentioned before. He hides things but returns them when asked and thanked. He’s just a naughty little boy but maybe a lonely one. So I chat to him.

humour imp

My sense of humour has been called “off centre, askew” and “off the wall” so I suppose that seeing my humour imp hanging from my left ear like this is quite apt.

Writing imp

I also try to use humour in my writing so who else would my writing imp be? Look at that face and tell me you don’t want to go and play.

There is another one who is creeping into my consciousness and that is Thumbelina. I’m not sure of her job but as she re-appears almost daily on my FB timeline I have to accept that she is here for a while. Any suggestions? Perhaps she is urging me to be a little more gentle both on myself and others. A kindness imp?

Thumbelina – copyright marked

That’s it – I have the writing study set up in my eyrie and I can get back to work after lunch if “you lot will just shut up”! I SAID SHUT UP!!! (the characters, not you, dear readers)

I think Iamo won!

Idiot seeks village

Well, I suppose I was asking for it, mentioning my brain damage and strokes so often….

I’m quite used to friends and relations calling me an idiot and they’re entitled to; they know me well enough to judge. Today, however, I received an email from a total stranger who has decided, on the basis of one error on my part, that I am an idiot. .

I was bringing my new dinky little Nexus 7 up to date and decided to make sure a friend’s Gmail address was on my list. Unfortunately, this character in Swansea has almost the same address, barring two letters, so he most unfortunately received a short message “Get this eh?” with an icon of a sice of cake.

OK, OK, my fault. As soon as I realised my mistake I should have sent another message, excusing myeself and asking him to ignore it. I get emails from total strangers all the time and just bin them. However, I was busy and in my usual muddle-headed state so I forgot.

So this is what I found in my inbox when I retired to play Sudoku on my Nexus (don’t laugh, at my age and state of health, a mug of cocoa and a game of Sudoku counts as a good time in bed!)

“errr, you do realise that just sending “get this?” is rather idiotic don’t you?

who are you? is this just spam? consider yourself lucky I didn’t just bin it,

Are you from a website or block I’ve registered with or are you just some idiot who picks emails out of thin air?

I for one have no idea.”

Of course I have sent my profound apologies for the obvious distress and anger I have caused him and admitted that yes, I am that idiot. I also explained the situation and hoped that he never made a slight error and got that kind of response.

I wonder if he feels vindicated now?

I don’t know why I “should consider myself lucky he didn’t just bin it” – that would have saved his time and mine but perchance he was having a bad day and needed an idiot to kick. Happy to oblige, Sir. Or may  I call you Andrew as we seem to be on such personal terms now?

Perhaps that is why steampunk is so popular. Maybe we are all trying to turn the clock back to a time when adventure was possible but with good manners and a little “live and let live” because the more I see of the world of social media, the more I despair of courtesy.

Between that and eternal threats of “unfriending” if I show any signs of my political views (no matter that I vote in France, not Britain) I am losing the will to live on-line.

Anyone know of any other villages short of idiots?  Baggy (pictured above) and I will apply.