R. Michael's Blog

There is No Proof!

As a fiction writer I’m familiar with legends and myths.  My occupation requires that I spend considerable time in the make-believe.  Fiction is a way to teach and learn truths without beating people over the head with them.  It softens the experience, and in spite of it not being real, it is incredibly relatable.  Sometimes the difference between fantasy and fiction become blurred.  There is something that’s been on my mind lately.  Sometimes there are difficult to explain or for some people downright unbelievable.

For the most cynical, nothing exists except for the stuff that can be proven repeatedly in a laboratory.  These folks then in turn may criticize anyone who has a more open-mind.  To be fair, I understand this point of view.  People are not known to be reliable witnesses and often misremember things.  Sometimes the truth is difficult to discern.  However, we have all seen people making angry, jeering comments on the internet who dare to believe or believe in something they do not.  These people justify their positions by saying “There is no proof!” Especially toward topics of religion, spirituality, the paranormal, or supernatural.

Anecdotal evidence may not be empirical, and is even unreliable to base entire beliefs off, but what if there are countless cases of anecdotes that have remarkable similarities?  Should those be dismissed as well?  A cynical person may say so, may point to the fact that coincidences don’t equate proof.  Perhaps, but what sort of proof would there be for let’s say the afterlife?  If someone is going to demand proof, he or she should know what sort of proof is required to be sufficient.  Sure, NDE’s are seen my skeptics as nothing more than a chemical reaction in a dying brain.  What about the cases where people saw the hospital room, described what the doctors said while unconscious?  If that doesn’t count as proof or even a strong suggestion, then what would?  How would an afterlife be proven?  Would anything suffice to those who are absolutely certain it doesn’t exist?

People tend to base their beliefs off their upbringing, worldview, and psychology, not necessarily evidence.  Certainly, there are exceptions though.  If someone has decided unequivocally that something does or does not exist, it is rather difficult to convince that person otherwise.  Ultimately, evidence may not be enough.  Also, what is convincing to one person may not be to another.

Demanding proof for something, especially God or the afterlife is a bit ironic to me, since technically you cannot prove that anyone outside of yourself exists.  Yes, that sounds like hokey mumbo jumbo, but we cannot know for absolute certainty that the people we know or the world around us as we perceive it is reality.  No, this isn’t delving into the Matrix theory.  The point is rather, there are things we take for grated every day, that cannot be proven.  Do you love your spouse?  Can that be proven?  Yes, endorphins can be measured, and some would say that is proof of love.  What if you have those endorphins but act like a jerk or are abusive to your spouse?  Do you really love that person then?  Love is more than chemicals, it is action.

Proof may not be subjective but how it is received definitely is.  This isn’t about convincing the reader what is and isn’t real, but to hopefully shed light on the fact that it may not be the proof but the person’s worldview that keeps him or her from seeing things from a different perspective.  It is simple to either believe everything or nothing at all, neither require thought and are realms of comfort.  Just something for us all to think about.

Why I am an Indie Author

When one does an online search of “indie author” or “self-published author,” he or she will get a slew of opinions.  Some are favorable, and some are not as favorable.  It seems the most common unfavorable views come from authors who are already published through a traditional service.  I can understand from the perspective of an author surviving all the hoops that come with traditional publishing that some would see self-publishing as the easier route to take.  There are a plethora of articles out there that tell the stories of why authors, even successful ones with publishing contracts, decide to go independent, so it is not necessary for me to reiterate that being an independent author, singer, or video game developer is just as viable of an option. You can search for yourself and find plenty of compelling stories.

What I want to share is why I have chosen this route.  It is not because I fear rejection from publishers, and it is not due to laziness.  No, I understand that publishers try to make an educated decision on what might sell, and an author’s work just may not fit into that.  Sure, there are low-quality, self-published works out there.  At the same time, though, I have read several poorly-written books that were published traditionally.  I have asked myself several times how certain books made it past the editors.  I chose this route out of years of research into the pros and cons of each type of publishing.  I decided that I did not need to sell millions of copies to be happy, and that I did not want to sign over the rights to all my work to someone else.  I understood from the beginning that I would have to bear all the weight of marketing my book, and I have grown to understand that this is a very difficult route.  However, at the end of the day, no one is forced to buy any book, and no matter what means of publication an author takes, there is no guarantee the book will sell.

For me, the struggle is worth it.  I am learning as I go to find what works and what doesn’t work.  I have spent over half my life dreaming of the day my writings would be available for the world to read.  I feel like, at least right now, handing over the rights to someone else would be a betrayal of my work.  I do not aim to get rich, but instead I hope to bring into the world the type of fantasy that I would like to read.

The Worlox

This is a repost from 2014.

The worlox are antagonists of The Schism and creatures of utter depravity.  Long before the events of the short story series, these demons entered into Goandria, and with them came destruction and death.  Much of Goandria froze over when the worlox arrived because of the power of these beings. But who are the worlox, and what makes them different from other antagonists?

The worlox are demons, but they are a diverse group.  I depict several kinds faced in The Schism.  Why would I chose this foe?  Well, this part of Goandria’s history is only hinted at in an upcoming novel series, and when I was a kid, I wrote out a timeline when the worlox ruled.  Until recently, though, I did not intend to write the story of the worlox. Then a friend who had read my first manuscript said it would make a great story.  I imagined a world before the Three Republics established in Goandria, a world where there are no real governments outside of the worlox.  The only laws, beside the worlox, are those of the wizards, and the wizards loosely enforce these laws at best.  Being representatives of Voshnore and his will, the wizards have taken charge to care for the people of Goandria.  Yet, like all people, the wizards are flawed.  They become somewhat self-righteous and arrogant, focusing on war instead of the people.

What I wanted to do with the worlox is have a very different enemy than the upcoming series.  In the novels that take place after The Schism, I have an oppressed people that comprise the armies of the antagonist.  I wanted to toy with the idea of powerful spiritual beings taking on physical form and dominating the world.  What would the world look like if demons did that?  Now my answer to that question is not as dark as it could be.  There was a bigger story to be told in The Schism, and I didn’t want to focus solely on the brutality of the worlox.  I also aim to have a large age range for my books, but there were times when I contemplated showing the true darkness within the worlox culture.  What I chose to do instead was offer bits and pieces, small glimpses into their world and what they are like.  Instead of focusing on the gritty dark details of their lives, I aim to show what it would be like to have armies of demons roaming the world and what inevitably happens when a race of inherently selfish beings take over Goandria.

More Lessons From Writing

Writing, like anything worth doing in life is challenging and filled with daily lessons.  One lesson became painfully obvious despite my many attempts to ignore it. I am on my own when it comes to marketing. I research quite heavily on how to market a book.  Many people suggested outsourcing marketing such as hiring bloggers to share or review your work.  There are an innumerable amount of people and “companies” on Twitter who are willing to Tweet books and/or put you in their email list to their “many” followers.

Like most authors trying to build a brand, I’ve had a hard time with marketing.  The feedback I’ve gotten on my books from people I trust has been largely positive.  However, giving out books for reviews rarely produces any reviews at all.  So many people say they would love to write a review but when it comes to committing, they simply don’t show up to prom.  To further that metaphor, I’m left alone on the dancefloor without a date that swore to Heaven she would show.  This is even after treating her like a princess and picking her up, she just slips away quietly right after we enter the school.

I feel like everything I’ve done as far as marketing is concerned is met with similar results.  My wife and I tried to hire a marketing team, but even with the prospect of paying company several hundred dollars they still took weeks to respond and never met their deadlines.  It’s beyond infuriating when I’m told I will get a response by Friday of this week and I don’t hear anything until four weeks have gone by and I contacted this person’s boss.  After this I felt depressed.  I am still learning how to find my audience.  I need someone to come along side me and work with R. Michael Books long-term.  I also got desperate.  Desperation never results in good judgement.

I decided to reach out to a blogger who writes book reviews who initially contacted me.  I researched this person and could not find anything bad about her and her site was professional and looked legitimate.  I did research on whether authors should pay bloggers and one site suggested it is a good way to get exposure as did a few others.  In my desperation I became convinced and decided to hire this blogger. She seemed professional and was always kind in her emails, so I ignored my reservations.  She did produce a review on her blog, but it was obvious that she hadn’t read my book.  It was just a bunch of flowery platitudes that were carefully crafted to stroke my ego, most likely in order to win a repeat customer. I decided to dig deep into Google and try to find ANYTHING I could about her other than what her website says.  Lo and behold I found a KDP thread where a few authors detailed a similar experience with this blogger.  I then carefully read through her blogs and they were all the same.  Overly flattering to the author, she was reviewing.

I tell of this experience because I learned a few things.  NEVER pay for a blogger to review your work.  No matter how reputable he/she may be.  The blog I purchased wasn’t technically for a positive review, and the site owner claims to only charge to help her family.  I also know as someone who has a few websites that they are expensive to keep operational.  It is frowned upon to pay for reviews in the literary world.  I honestly didn’t realize that until it was after the fact and I did more reading on the topic, which meant going more than a few pages into Google.  This review is utterly useless due to the nature of how it was designed to flatter me more than actually giving an honest look at my book.  Initially I justified this in my mind because there are large companies that review books for several hundred dollars.  Well-known companies and I found it odd that paying them is considered professional but not a blogger.  Honestly, I don’t think either are all that helpful.  As authors when it comes to getting reviews and selling our books it is based on time and hard work.  Throwing money at the situation doesn’t solve the problem.  I’ve learned my lesson, and if you are an author too, learn from mine as well.

Mediums of Storytelling: Movies

I have written a blog in the past about how I feel it is absurd for people to be surprised by the fact that movie adaptions of books are almost always different.  In that post I covered both television and movie adaptions, but here I would like to focus solely on movies.  Films may not have the length or depth of books, but they are viable means to tell a story, especially if there are time constraints.

Movies have a problem of time, something novels general don’t have to worry about.  Films typically do not exceed three hours because many people do not have time to sit through something that long or have that extensive of an attention span.  Books take time to consume, movies do not, and for authors sometimes we need quick bursts of inspiration.  Films fulfill this role.  Aside from the shorter length, the visual stimulation that comes from movies is unparalleled.  Reading is essential to being an author, but sometimes being well-versed in movies is as well.

With the advancement of technology, the cinematic experience has evolved and has enhanced movies beyond their campy, stilly status decades prior.  With these enhancements compiled with a different vision, directors almost universally decide to change their version of a story that originally was a novel.  Those who read the books typically get upset over the differences, and these changes can affect the movie’s critical reviews.  It blows me away that people still get upset over the fact that movies and books are usually different.  This has been the case for decades.  Why are people still surprised by this?  Just because there are differences doesn’t mean the movie is bad, sometimes the changes are good.  Movies and books are two completely different forms of art, and by extension of that reality inevitably tell stories differently.  Both are still equally legitimate.

In the writing community, books are praised, and movies are either forgotten as sources of inspiration or looked down upon.  I feel this might be partially because of the differences between movie and film adaptations of the same stories and the stigma that goes along with it.  It is possible to appreciate all forms of storytelling, including the old and modern.

Mediums of Storytelling: Videogames

The next couple blog posts will be on my experiences and thoughts with varying forms of storytelling and their influence on writing.  Reading is heavily influential on writing, after all writing begets writing.  Writing stories is not just about novels.  Television, movies, and videogames all involve this process.

I’ve been playing videogames since I was six years old.  It didn’t take long to learn about the stigma around the hobby.  Those who play videogames are often thought of as lonely childish men living in their parents’ basement.  Adults who haven’t played games before tend to think they are for children only, despite a good portion of them rated mature.

As a medium, videogames have evolved considerably since the 80s and 90s when they started to gain popularity.  Back in the day, story was secondary to gameplay, if it was even existent at all, outside of RPGs.  Now, compelling and inspiring stories are told through videogames, and subsequently are fuel for writing stories of my own.  Even when the story isn’t explicit through cut scenes or a plethora of text to read, certain series do it masterfully through the gameplay itself.  Castlevania, Metroid, and The Legend of Zelda games are just a few examples.

Sure, videogames are abused by some folks.  I had a roommate in college that would play World of Warcraft for 48 hours at a time sometimes.  He would rarely go to class and practically lived in front of his computer screen playing games.  Spending hours a day neglecting responsibility has been associated with videogames, along with provoking violence.  However, that is by far the minority.  Anything can be abused.  Television certainly is and has been since its invention.  I would even submit even reading for hours and hours on end isn’t healthy either.  Why?  We may be working our minds while reading but we are still sedentary.

Videogames are a way to gain visual inspiration just as television shows with deep stories.  Authors who are gamers shouldn’t be ashamed of, in fact we should embrace it as a means to dive into a world rich with inspiration.

I Believe in Science!

I just started writing a science fiction novel.  With writing in a new genre comes research and new things begin to stand out more than normal. Many times, I come across either memes on social media or blog posts declaring that a person or group “believes in science.” I find this to be rather odd.

I’ve never read about, met, or otherwise known of anyone who doesn’t believe in the process of coming up with a hypothesis and testing it to see if the results are not only possible but repeatable.  Despite what some may think, I am not sure there are many worldviews that are actively against believing in such processes.  Of course, I’m not an idiot and know that this declaration is meant to counter what the scientific community’s stances are on evolution and climate change.  More accurately, “I believe in science!” is a statement that has baggage which indirectly is sometimes used to discredit “religious” beliefs.  Not always, but it is true rather often.

As a Christian who accepts the scientific findings, I am all too aware that the culture that surrounds my faith is known for rejecting things that appear painfully obvious to those who do not adhere to Christianity.  I would argue that such an instance isn’t about rejecting science, but instead scientists’ findings and claims.  Those who announce their love for science claim those who do not fully accept climate change and evolution to be real fail to understand or believe science at all.  Those on the receiving side of those arguments say that there are things science cannot answer and can and has been wrong before.  “Religious” folks do not see it as rejecting science as a process.  Many of them believe science supports other ideas than what are mainstream.  Instead they reject common belief due to worldviews and that history has shown that scientists have been wrong before.  Do I as a Christian agree with this position?  Not entirely.  Yes, scientific consensus has been wrong in the past and until more information comes to light we might find out that is the case now as well.  That is the nature and beauty of science.  However, where I disagree is to use that as a catch all to simply justify preconceptions and therefore reject an idea even when heaps upon heaps of evidence, peer reviews, and testable evidence support a theory.

This topic ties into my previous blog post about truth.  People believe what they want to believe no matter what evidence is given.  One must not only be open-minded but have a worldview that doesn’t crumble simply because something is uncomfortable.  This is true on all matters, not just heavy topics like climate change.  Another thing that would help would be for both believers and non-believers to acknowledge that science and faith are not incompatible.  Certainly, they are if either are layered with presuppositions, but that doesn’t have to be the case.  Ultimately, believing in science does not equate believing in scientific claims.  The process and the results are different.  Political and religious worldviews shape how we interpret these claims.  I would argue both political sides ignore important scientific truths.  The reality is we must do our best to curb our natural human bias with discernment.  This is possible, but a difficult endeavor.

Love in Fiction

Love is the most essential component to the human condition.  We all need it to grow and live.  Without love we would die.  It’s that simple.  We are meant to love, that’s one of the defining characteristics of humanity.  However, humanity is flawed, and we have both longed for love and struggled with it.  Romantic love is the type of love often synonymous with the word.  It has been depicted in stories of all kinds as long as humans told tales.  As the Beauty and the Beast song goes “It’s a tale as old as time.”

Romantic love in fiction is spontaneous, it is something that comes over people and they simply cannot help it.  This is somewhat rooted in reality, after all there are biological processes that give us a high when we feel in love with a new person.  This is a temporary feeling.  Love certainly does last afterward, but the high does not.  It seems to me that often fiction focuses on this high, or at least the emotional state of love.  Many people seemed to have bought into this with the idea of “falling in” and “falling out” of love.  These two ideas give the connotation that love is something that happens to us.  We have no control over who we love right?

Well, we cannot control who we find attractive, but love is a choice.  Love is hard.  It requires us to be selfless even when we are at our weakest, most selfish lows.  I am speaking to myself as much as anyone when I write this.  I am far from perfect at love, sometimes I’m downright bad at it.  Love also requires us to not give up on the other person just because they are having a low. (Disclaimer: Abuse is an exception.  Anyone in those cases needs to get away and seek help.) Sometimes we get crabby, or snap at the one we love.  Sometimes we get into dark ruts.  These are times when love is tested, when love must go beyond mere emotion.  That is because love isn’t emotion at all like most fiction portrays it, love is action.

Yes, love is an action.  Emotions are fickle and often irrational.  I can feel depressed but still love my wife.  I can feel blah and still love her.  Loving someone is not contingent upon a “spark” or feeling, it is about action.  Love is about maintaining integrity when it’s hardest.  Again, I say this to myself as much as anyone.  It is something I need to take to heart every day.  Love is hard, but necessary and unimaginably rewarding if you persist.  That is what most fiction doesn’t tell us.

Throwback Blog: Goandria

This is a re-post from 2014.

What drives an 11-year-old to hammer away at the keyboard instead of going outside or playing sports?  That is something I do not understand, but I was that 11-year-old.  The world of Goandria has gone through many versions and morphed so many times, but at the same time, it remains familiar.  Much like an old friend, writing in this world has offered comfort and has become so integrated into my life that if I am parted from it for too long, I feel as if there is a hole in my soul.

Before age 11, if someone had told me I was going to aspire to become a writer, I wouldn’t have believed it.  I wanted to sing.  As a child, I felt I had my life figured out, like many children do.  In my early years, I was not particularly good at reading, and I could not write well either.  I struggled through all my English classes, and often barely passed, but there were two worlds that filled me with awe: Star Wars and Lord of the Rings.  These stories left me wanting more, taught me about love, life and friendships, and transported me to a world where the impossible was possible.  This was the beginning of my love for fantasy.

While sitting in church one day, the idea came to me to start writing and create my own world.  It wasn’t particularly original or good at first.  At that time, it was called “The Land of Golah.”  As time went on and I grew and learned more, the desire grew within me to create a world that was my own, original and not just a copy of the stories that inspired me.  Yes, I know, that is the goal of every writer, and it is up to my readers to decide if I succeeded, but what I wanted was to break away from the clichés that plague Fantasy.  For example, a Dark Lord/Lady who is evil just for the sake of evil is too prevalent in fantasy worlds.  In my first full-length novel that I plan to release in early 2015, there is a dark lord (so to speak), but I wanted to show things from his perspective.  I wanted the reader to get inside his head and understand why he does what he does.  This is something that does not happen with Sauron in Lord of the Rings.  The reader knows Sauron is evil, but we really don’t know why or what drives him other than his wish to dominate all people and their wills.

My goal with the Goandria series is to offer a story that is familiar yet fresh for fantasy readers.  There are thousands of Lord of the Rings clones out there, and while I love Tolkien’s work, let us leave Middle-Earth in Middle-Earth.

Character Growth

I wrote a blog before about how characters are expected to change and grow. That is a fair expectation, if all characters were static they wouldn’t be interesting.  Everyone changes to some degree, but how many people change significantly enough where they would be considered a “dynamic” character in a book? Honestly, I do not know the answer. Maybe it’s everyone, maybe the number is a small minority.

From my limited perspective the anecdotal evidence in life seems to indicate that people both change and stay the same simultaneously.  How is that possible?  As people grow older their behaviors change, become more refined, their habits that are good and bad become deeper entrenched. It is common from what I’ve seen for people to become set in their ways and when they encounter challenges to their lifestyle they become defensive.  However, they become set in their ways after adapting to the environment form their childhood and early adulthood.

True change is hard.  I think we all can say we do things that we wish we would change, but despite hating certain behaviors or habits, sometimes they still rear their ugly head. From my limited point-of-view it appears that people eventually accept these habits as a part of who they are.  As I said, change is hard. It takes active participation every day, and frankly not everyone has the will to follow through. There are things I am challenged with daily too.  There are things that I do sometimes that I know are wrong yet do them anyway because they have become ingrained in me.  This is a struggle that we all deal with, but I want to actively try to change them.  Sometimes it is discouraging because it never feels like there is going to be a light at the end of the tunnel.  Sometimes “discouragement” is too weak of a word, “depression” and “hopelessness” are more fitting.  We feel like we can’t be better, we are a slave to our whims, passions, and habits. However, we can change.  Every one of us, no matter what the issue may be. Let us all actively work hard to be better men and women everyday while accepting perfection isn’t going to be possible. We don’t have to be slaves to our habits and become set in our ways.