April E. Brucker's Blog, page 68

Egg Drop Soup and Old Friends

Yesterday wasn't such a hot day. I was sick. My body hurt. Walking up the stairs was a chore. Not to mention I had the runs, I know, overshare. Anyway, I called my mommy with all my health concerns like I always do. My mom said it was lack of protein. But I am always getting protein. She said it was bad protein. I mentioned I had been eating a lot of cart food and she said that was it. But my food cart is usually pretty good. Maybe I had gotten the old Denny's Style Rainbow Meat. Either way, my mom recommended a chicken from the supermarket. But I had been getting the runs so badly that nothing was staying down. So I figured chicken tomorrow,soup today.

The Chinese place around the corner serves the most delicious Egg Drop Soup in the world. I had some and it was like heaven. My stomach settled and I began to feel relaxed and went out like a light. Not only did it taste good, but that settled my stomach. I slept for a few hours, just tired from a week steeped in action. Monday I had a gig in Westchester. Tuesday I had some book stuff. Wednesday more book stuff. And yesterday I donated one of my books to a worthy cause.

I woke up for a little bit, fought with an old friend online, had some iced cream, and went to sleep.

The Egg Drop Soup had helped. My stomach was settled,just a little tired.

When I woke up I saw an old friend Maura McCarthy decided to follow me on Twitter. We had done a theatre camp together when we were kids in Pittsburgh. She looked good, had become a red head, and was acting in LA. I had remembered liking Maura and it had been forever since we spoke. I tweeted at her and said I was glad she was still acting.

Maura tweeted back and said that indeed it had been a long time and she saw my article in xoJane! I was like wowsa! Way to reconnect. In case you have not seen my article here it is xo http://www.xojane.com/sex/i-am-a-fema...

This was awesome. My friend Mandy Stadtmiller, who is utterly amazing, got me to write the piece. The whole experience has been exciting.

Anyway, it made my morning. I am feeling better today. Also am getting my first royalty check for my book in the mail. SO EXCITED!

EVERYTHING IS COMING UP ROSES.

OKAY CRAY CRAY, STOP WRITING IN CAPS!!!!!


Love
April
I Came, I Saw, I Sang: Memoirs of a Singing Telegram Delivery Girl
877-Buy-Books
www.buybooksontheweb.com
Available on Amazon


Come to my book signing
December 27, 2012 @ 7pm
Bethel Park Public Library
5100 W. Library Ave
Bethel Park, PA

Hero of the Week: Larry DePrimo

His name is Officer Larry DiPrimo, he is twenty-five years old. Larry is a member of NYC's finest. I say he is a member of NYC's finest for two reasons. One,it is what we call our officer's of the law. Second, he did a good deed.

The story began on November 14th. There was a homeless man who was without socks or shoes. On the blustery night Officer Larry could feel the cold seep through his two layers of socks and boots. Ordinarily on patrol in The Village, Officer Larry was covering Times Square that night because of a shortage of people. Anyway, he heard two passerby's snickering about the shoeless and sockless old homeless hobo. Officer Larry caught site of the man and thought, "If I am feeling the cold he must be freezing."

Officer Larry walked over to the homeless man and asked him if he had anything to cover his feet. The man said, "Sir, I have never owned a pair of socks or shoes." Officer Larry, saddened by this man and perhaps feeling as if he had entered some tragic Dickens novel, asked the man his shoe size. He said that he would buy the man a pair of shoes and didn't care what the cost was.

So Officer Larry went to the Sketcher store and spent one hundred dollars on a pair of boots and gave them to the guy.   The tale would have stopped there except a tourist from Arizona caught the whole thing on camera. The photo was posted to the NYPD's facebook page and garnered almost a million likes! And now he is in the New York Daily News. 

Officer Larry DiPrimo did not know he was being captured on camera and he did the right thing for the right reason. That is rare. I also hope he is single....

Either way,it's a good story to start off the holidays.


April E. Brucker
I Came, I Saw, I Sang: Memoirs of a Singing Telegram Delivery Girl
877-Buy-Book
www.buybooksontheweb.com
Amazon.com


Come to my book signing
December 27, 2012 @ 7pm
Bethel Park Public Library
5100 W. Library Ave
Bethel Park, PA

Loser of the Week: William Bailey

Well I came across this story in the news and this man is beyond stupid. He defines fucktard, dickwad, assweed, and cunt scab. Yes, I am talking about William Bailey, the Canton, Ohio man who made fun of a little nine year old girl named Hope Holcomb with cerebral palsy trying to get off the school bus. If that wasn't bad enough he got his kid to join in and encouraged his son to, "Walk like a retard."

Apparently,the two families have children in the same school and have been feuding. Even so, the feud is between the adults. This has nothing to do with the children you tremendous dickwad fucktard assweed cunt scab inbred mouth breather! This man had no words for his shiteous actions. Then again, COWARDS AND BULLIES NEVER DO!

Well he has entered the court of Brucker. This is my place and I propose they punish this feindish low life in the following ways.

1. Sentence him to jail like they have for a month.

2. Have him strapped to the wall in jail and have a bunch of angry, sex starved convicts probably looking at life sentences do what they will.

3. Make sure they beat him so badly that he walks with a limp for life.

Maybe the Geneva Convention will sue me for my Judge Dread style of justice but rest assured this man deserves an ass whoopin. A man who bullies a disabled little girl is not a man. He is a coward and a bully.

My bet is that his kid is a little asshole and a little bastard with a rat tail who terrorizes other children. Wonder where he gets it from? But then again behind ever jerkoff child is a jerkoff parent.

Anyway,the dude as I said got jail. Which relieves me to no end because in this ever changing world the people are making a statement. Bullying of any kind and any way,shape,or form is unacceptable. Hell, let me have a swing at this moron. I bet you I could beat his ass. But why should I? Ten other people will.

Of course I better be nice to this piece of white trash. He will be either pumping my gas or serving my fries.

Regardless of your political views this man deserves an ass whoopin. You don't believe me, watch the video right here. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ij8_hoZRSZY

Aaron Carter and Angus T. Jones, you have been dethroned. There is a new grand high fuck up in
town.
This is what I would call a professional asshole. He makes fun of a little girl with a disability. Someone needs to kick his ass pronto. Weekend trip to Canton, anyone? Even your own kid doesn't want to be seen with you. I think he is plotting to run away and with good reason.
A smiling, happy, nice child does not deserve to be bullied. She might walk with a limp but that is the last of her problems. Go little Hope! You are a ray of sunshine and let us know if he bothers you again ;)


 




Love
April
I Came, I Saw,I Sang: Memoirs of a Singing Telegram Delivery Girl
877-Buy-Book
www.buybooksontheweb.com
Available on Amazon

Come to my signing
December 27 7pm
Bethel Park Public Library
5100 W. Library Ave
Bethel Park, PA

And for a more salacious selection: http://www.xojane.com/sex/i-am-a-female-ventriloquist-who-got-asked-to-have-a-threeway-for-money-with-my-female-puppet
 

Fan Art By Libby Jay

Check out some new fan art for yours truly from Miss Libby Jay





April BruckerI Came, I Saw, I Sang: Memoirs of a Singing Telegram Delivery Girl877-Buy-Bookwww.buybooksontheweb.comAmazon.com

Come to my signingDecember 27 @ 7pmBethel Park Library 5100 W. Library AveBethel Park, PA 15102

She Talks to Angels (Black Crows)

Every year, around the middle of October to the middle of November I always try to work on something to improve myself. It's not that I don't believe in New Year's Resolutions but everyone does things in their own time and this is mine. That window is significant because October 17th is the anniversary of my friend Chacho's passing, and November 16th is my friend Joe's birthday, also deceased. While it can be said this is morbid time of year for me, it's not. I use it as a time for self-reflection, self-improvement, and to move towards a positive goal. I don't think both dates were placed so close by accident, but rather because the universe was giving me a window to start a project and carry it out.

This is the first year I have done it. Well okay, I sort of started two years ago when Chacho passed running after my dreams. Then I got the wheels in motion for the book. This year I still found the hole in my heart was gaping huge. I got mad and used my time terribly. I made the genius decision to unblock my whole blocked list on facebook which met with disaster. So I figured in the spirit of the flamboyant voguer and the quiet set designer I would start another positive project. Working on a set that was both clean and funny.

I initially started this project on the anniversary of my Chacho's passing when I sort of got dumped from a show I was a well-publicized act for because I wasn't "family friendly enough." Sure, I had done kids and church shows when I was younger, but drunk night club audiences don't want well thought out material. They want filth and lots of it. They said I could send them a video of my new act and blah blah blah. Part of me was like, "Fuck you! You have seen me on TV! People stormed the dressing room the last time I was on the show to meet me and my children!"But they don't care who I think I am.

I went out that night to Cha Chas (ironically close to my boy's name) to keep from killing someone. It had been a rough week. I had verbally castrated a wannabe punk booker. While he deserved it, I should have written him off as a mere loss. My goal was to work clean. I figured even if I sucked at least I was doing something positive. Well I didn't suck. I actually had done really well!

The truth is, I was forced to be clean on the spot in Coney this summer and managed well. But now I was really working at it and found I could do it. I felt empowered. I felt positive. I felt like I was moving forward. Granted,someone tried to give me drink specials on my way home and I yelled at them screaming, "Chemical dependency killed my friend!" But this is a practice of progress not perfection.

I worked clean a few more times before Sandy hit and couldn't do anything. When I finally got up I felt drained and was down on standup and the so called business. That's when I thought I saw someone who looked like my friend Joe, probably the universe telling me I needed a better attitude.

One thing about Joe was that Joe used to tell me how very funny I was. Sometimes,when one of our Chelsea Boys would be talking about some empty drivel Joe would whisper, "Say something provocative. This is getting boring." While quiet and sweet he had a devilish streak. But overall he was a big brother type and angel in disguise.

I can picture Joe now, coffee cup and cigarette. I am telling him I am scared of losing my identity by doing a good set.

Joe takes a puff of his cigarette and says, "Are you afraid or just lazy?"

Last night, after having been off stage for a week and a half I decided to make good on this goal. I went down to Cha Cha's and was greeted by world's bitchiest waitress. She barked at me twice. Heather was great though, which made me think twice about decking the waitress. Anyway,the show was good and I went up. I didn't swear once and I killed it. Okay, the ending needs work but my riffing was awesome.I need to not drop the energy but overall I killed it.

I DIDNT SWEAR ONCE!!!!!!

I made new friends and it ended up being a great night. On the subway home I felt empowered. It also made me realize how important it was that I am taking this step. My mother has wanted me to take it for a long time. Not to mention it is more lucrative. But also Chacho and Joe would want me to do this not just for the betterment for me personally but professionally.

Of course Chacho, who used to brag about knowing someone on TV when he was alive and that someone being me, would be posed in his Louis Vuitton. He would be filing his nails and be ready for the flashing lights of the cameras. He would tell me that as long as there is more TV time to potentially be had I need to make room onstage,he wants his cameo ASAP. Chacho would remind me that while I am the star,he is still the one with the better wardrobe and lest I forget he has better skin because he botoxed earlier. Then he would kindly pass some of his mojo over my way. Then a hot guy would pass and he would lose his concentration.

Joe on the otherhand would hang back, with his cigarette and cup of coffee. He would tell me again how funny I am. Of course he would also dismay that they were not using better lighting and that the design is so simplistic and bland. Joe would be taking notes the entire time whether it was on my show on the set, mainly the set. He would enjoy the show with some critical feedback but that chair would never work. And then a cute guy would pass and he too could lose his concentration.

Point being, this is what I need todo to get to the next level. Chacho and Joe would want me there with the best dress ever. Joe would be mad he didnt design it and Chacho would be trying to steal it for himself. But their spirits never left me, rather they are with me in another altered form, at least this is my belief. And they want me to use this window every year to better myself. And now I am working clean. Not just for me but for them. I know I have their support all the way.

Yesterday was a productive day. Got published in xoJane, spoke to someone about further marketing my book.

And I worked clean.

Amen to that.

Love
April
I Came, I Saw, I Sang: Memoirs of a Singing Telegram Delivery Girl
877-Buy-Book
www.buybooksontheweb.com
Available on Amazon


Come to my book signing
December 27, 2012 @7pm
Bethel Park Library
5100 W. Library Ave
Bethel Park, PA

INDIEpendent Woman

For the past five years I have had no agent or manager. I had one several years ago. The thing is, he really wasnt doing anything for me.Yes, he got me the some commercial spot that was fun but regrettable. Yes, he got me a cute headshot. No, he really wasnt doing much else aside from trying to drug me and sleep with me.    So I let him go.

For about a few months I was unsure, drinking heavily and wandering around the comedy scene with my puppet hoping to find management. None came. However, what did come was another TV spot just because I showed up somewhere with May. I was standing in line like many unrepresented people and they pointed a camera my way. WE got on TV. Rest is history. There were people who had private auditions that didnt get nearly as much air time as I did. One lady, a fattie who won some old lady contest, bitched on a comedy blog that I got more air time than her friend with facial warts. Needless to say the bitch had management and I did not. She could be passive aggressive because she was ugly and misused big words, but I was on big TV and everyone and their mother saw me.

I was sticking it to the MANager.

The next year I stayed in touch with one guy who sort of jerked me around and then freelanced with another. One got me a cancelled gig and the other just sent me out for things I was wrong for. But through my own doing I got on Good Day NY. Say what you will about my Rachael Ray appearance but I procured that with no guidance whatsoever. The ugly hipsters at Best Week Ever felt the need to cyberbully me. Joel McHale was mean to me. But if those bitches had to do it on their own they couldnt. Today I am somewhat of a cult legend because of that. Not to mention the blogger at Best Week Ever got fired and got fat. I however went on to appear on Cinematherapy.

No bad for someone who is unMANageable in the eyes of the morons who claim to own reputable operations.

Of course the following year was a lil rough. Paid the price for being me. Doors slammed because lets face it,when a woman takes a risk she is either a darling or a deviant. I was more the ladder and it worked against me. However,through my own hard work I booked an appearance with Jeff Foxworthy. I was on Pix all the time. I had friends with big managers who bitched and moaned that they hadnt been on TV in years. Lil April Brucker went and did it on her own. One so called comedy manager booked me for some gig where the owner tried to get me to pose naked and cheaped out on a mic. Sigh, I did better on my own.

I was MANaging thank you very much.

The following year I began doing my own videos. I was slowly discovering standup was dead. Through fierce determination I got underground stars and dealt with their agents and managers. I was also on Shovio,with people who were well regarded in radio and film as a pro, and they all had big time management. Not to mention this was the year my babies and I were on TLC and a plethora of other outlets, all on our own. Hell I got more air time in one week than someone under the umbrella of the best and brightest gets ever. Fan mail trickled in. I thought at this point I would get quality NYC representation as well as better club spots. Neither happened.

No MANager no cry.

Of course the next year I did a lot. I was a talking head for an online network and began releasing music. My music got internet airplay. It was awesome. I also began steps to publish and release my book. I worked for a minute with a manager in Las Vegas but it didnt end up working out. While a nice guy, I wasnt getting the publishing contract I wanted and my lawyer wouldnt let me sign away my rights. I didn't know what was next.

Somehow I MANaged.

This year I had a song that was number one on the internet for five weeks. There are artists who have management that can't even get airplay. I also had a short in the Manhattan International Film Festival and got that through my own connections. My book has been sold out twice on Amazon and I have appeared on the website of Britney Spears and am being sold overseas. No literary agent or manager. No comedy agent or manager. No record label.

I don't need the MAN or woMAN. I am MANaging quite well.

The biggest misconception is that you need an agent or manager. I have many friends with so called top notch representation who flounder aimlessly in the pond. They collect dust on someone's shelf. They have never been on TV. I have been on TV God knows how many times and no one is helping me. Did I mention I pitched a show to ten networks? None of my signed friends have done that. Maybe sometimes it would be nice to have someone tie up the loose ends but that is not God's plan for me at the moment. Maybe I should chase them but they own a TV. Plus I have no trouble getting on TV thank you. And thank you to my puppet babies.

There are lots of folks who are indie that do well. Yannis Pappas is killing it in the clubs and on youtube with a fan base better than any of the washed up fools on a lot of rosters in the city.

Eddie Brill never had management and has been on Letterman more than any other comic in the show.

Bill Murray never had representation and he has had a career more incredible than anyone who has.

Ani DiFranco couldn't get repped and came to love being indie and eventually got her own record label.

These are just a few.

Maybe if the right agent or manager comes along I will give them a whirl. Plus I won't have to fight with people for money. It's harder being indie but hard work makes success and there is no rest for the weary.  I like it because I call the shots on my career and don't have to be steered in the wrong direction by some MANager who views me as a commission rather than an artist and will waste my time with his money grubbing stupidity.

I don't need a MANager to waste my time.

I am an INDIEpendant WOMAN.

Love
April
I Came, I Saw, I Sang:Memoirs of a Singing Telegram Delivery Girl
877-Buy-Book
www.buybooksontheweb.com
Available on Amazon

Come to my book signing
December 27 @7
Bethel Park Library
5100 W. Library Ave
Bethel Park PA 15102

When Child Stars Meltdown: Angus T. Jones

Child stars are cute when they are children. The Olsen Twins were cute on Full House. Of course Lindsay Lohan was funny and charming in The Parent Trap. Lest we forget Dustin Diamond was somewhat endearing as Screech, the bully target of Bayside High and dork that we all loved on Saved By the Bell?

But then they got annoying. The Olsen's developed a drug dependency and eating disorder and may or may not have been getting Oxys for Mr. Heath Ledger. Lindsay Lohan is a tabloid headline that just keeps going,and we all fear her death but like Bobby Brown, another kiddie star, she will live until she is one hundred. Dustin Diamond now rips off his fans, lies about his penis size,and releases sex tapes with ugly women. I would say let him go but aside from an atrocious comedy routine that he tours with, Diamond wrote Behind the Bell, a tell all book where this brokeass who has no career tells lies about his costars and the women he slept with. Of course his competition is Lark Vorhees, his once costar refusing to take her psych meds who showed up to an interview with what looked to be the residue of baking flower on her face.

But the latest is Angus T. Jones. The cheeky star of Two and a Half Men has found God. And when celebrity kids find God they also find ways to annoy all of us. Jones testified on behalf of his whacky church telling people not to watch the show because it is immortal. Jones claimed that he was serving Satan by raking in millions and being cast member on this show.He said he would leave now but was legally bound by contract. Small Fat Fried Tater Tot went on to say that since his parent's divorce he was tempted to drink but Jesus saved him from drugs and alcohol.And while women tempted him God was overseeing him and he was still a virgin.

Well Angie, the way you are going it looks like women aren't tempting you and it's not just your choice it's everyone's. So you will be keeping that V Card forever Jesus Boy.

Now as for the serving Satan claims, let's see how he changes his tune when they fire him and the only thing that underqualified, overindulged little bastard can do is serve fries for $5.75 an hour at McDonalds? Suddenly serving Satan  won't be so bad.

When Kirk Cameron went God at least he capitalized by making annoying movies.Lisa Welchel wrote books and went on Survivor. Angus T. Jones just needs to go away.

Maybe he will develop a drug problem, will add some depth to his obvious issues and make him more fun. Maybe he will become a bad tabloid headline, but God boys are never that much fun.Maybe Dustin Diamond will teach him the art of standup comedy.

Dear God no.

Angus drank the Kool-Aid. It's all too late.

Jesus saved me.Now off to save Sheen







I Came, I Saw, I Sang: Memoirs of a Singing Telegram Delivery Girl877-Buy-Bookwww.buybooksontheweb.comAvailable on Amazon

Come to my book signingDecember 27,2012 7pmBethel Park Public Library5100 W. Library Ave.Bethel Park,PA

Lesser Celeb Sibling of the Week: Aaron Carter

There are some celebrity families where talent runs. For example the Barrymore's have been actors for generations and each talented and sustaining a career. Even the Sheen clan with Emilio, Martin, and while he is currently on and off the rails Charlie. Of course there are the Howards with Ronnie, Bryce and my lovely former classmate Paige.

But there are some exceptions to the rule. One is the Carter Clan. Nick was a Backstreet Boy. He danced and made girls swoon. Then he went to rehab. But my point is, he put the family on the map and knew when to hang up.

Unfortunately his cokehead brother Aaron does not. Mooching off of his brother's fame he made a retarded album as a tween, but the tween girls like it. My point is that he should have just hung it up. But like the Energizer Bunny with Downs he keeps going in the wrong direction annoying everyone. As of late he is not only releasing an album (dear God) but also in the Fantasticks off Broadway. This marginal family member of a once A-lister somehow had enough clout to take that role away from a talented actor. I wouldn't care except he's an obnoxious asshole on the twitter.

He writes:

1. I am not a manufactured artist.

Yes you are. You are a rip off of your boy band brother.

2. Nick is appearing on SNL. Tell the producers to take it easy on the boy bands.

They sing and dance like morons, have no talent, and are overweight at this point. Hell no, they need to be putting the heat on.

3. In our family we stick together.

Yes, because Nick is your meal ticket.

Then the moron went further to block my friend Libby on the McTwitter when she told him that he was in fact a manufactured artist, boy bands need to be worked harder, and he is a lesser celebrity sibling.


Oh and these days Aaron is looking like a big old cokehead. Basically, he looks a lil like Kurt Cobain before the suicide, riding the white horse and the white pony. You don't lose this kind of weight and have this kind of wasting by going to the gym.

Either way, he would have no career if Nick were not your brother. Aaron Carter is a depressing waste of human flesh and reminds us all that success is sometimes about who you know and who you blow. And that the lesser sibling is always the more annoying sibling.

Hopefully he will accidentally wander into traffic and die.

I look like Kurt Cobain, I have the drug problem minus the talent





Enough about this moron. Back to people with actual talent like myself (this is my blog)
I Came, I Saw, I Sang: Memoirs of a Singing Telegram Delivery Girl
877-Buy-Book
www.buybooksontheweb
Available on Amazon

Come to my signing
December 27 2012 @ 7pm
Bethel Park Library
5100 W. Library Ave
Bethel Park, PA

Craigslist Ads From Hell

These were real ads I saw on the CL throughout the years. Sometimes you just need to remember these experiences so that you can move forward with your life and keep laughing. And by the way, these ads unfortunately are word for word. 

1. Models needed to demonstrate erotic massage for couples. While the job does not require sex or groping, models will be required to be naked.

2. Topless bartender needed for event. Elite businessmen. We are not creeps, just Europeans looking to have a good time.

3. I am a businessman looking to spoil a struggling actress or student. It is a sugar daddy/sugar baby arrangement. We meet once a week. Serious inquiries only.

4. Discounted rent for a special lady struggling to make it. I am a man with an obscene amount of wealth looking for the right woman and a casual romantic relationship. I am not creepy and will not press for sex right away.

5. I am a businessman who has a certain fetish, and that fetish is to see a beautiful female vegetarian urinate and defecate in front of me. I will not do anything nasty to you, I will just keep your waste in plastic bags for my own amusement.

6. Are you disabled or seriously physically deformed and have you ever dreamed of being a model? If that is the case our fashion show wants you. It's this Saturday in the Bronx.

7. Midget Mud Wrestlers Wanted For Bar in Queens. Serious inquiries only.

8. Are you a woman who has been a victim of rape, incest, or abuse? Look no further. Here is an opportunity to earn fifty dollars an hour and revenge against men as a dominitrix. I will be your slave and will be in bondage while you whip me and work out your PTSD through aggression. What do you say ladies?

9. Have you had a love affair with a famous spirit from the 18th or 18th century, and insist their being deceased didn't interfere with your love life? If so we want to hear from you.

10. Ebony Escorts, save and discreet, looking for girls to start working ASAP. It's a great way to make money ladies.

Reply with a few of your own. I know you have them.

Love
April
I Came, I Saw, I Sang: Memoirs of a Singing Telegram Delivery Girl
877-Buy-Book
www.buybooksontheweb.com
Available on Amazon

Come to my Book Signing
December 27th 2012 @ 7pm
Bethel Park Public Library
5100 W. Library Ave
Bethel Park, PA
15102

What a Difference a Mani/Pedi Makes

Hello Darlings. I know I was a little out of sorts yesterday with my depression. Anyway, I felt like staying in bed all day and watching Married With Children. But my mom urged me to get a mani/pedi. I went to the salon and started to get my mani/pedi when I saw a girl I knew from the neighborhood. She had met a guy online and was flying out to Phoenix the next day to see him. But here's the thing, they talk and text daily but she hadnt heard from him in two days. The cad was breaking her heart and she was unsure of what to do. Should she stay or go? Should she go to Phoenix or get a hotel? These were all questions to be settled at the nail salon.

I told her not to worry and then she would hear from him.

Enter a third woman. She agreed with me. Keep the hotel and if it doesn't work out with his guy then she just has a vacation of her own to go on. We all agreed that men were obtuse, thoughtless creatures with no feelings. As we talked we made our friend feel better about her voyage. The third girl made an important point, you need to put yourself out there and risk getting hurt. And if you get hurt it means that you just keep moving. Cry for one day but keep on moving.

She talked about this guy she met over the summer who seemed hot on her but then totally stood her up when he was invited to her ice show. Then she sent him a picture and he was McShade about the whole thing. They still talk but her heart isn't on him. Then we reminisced about Kindred Spirit who behaved much the same way. These guys always tell you one thing and then want another. They love you one minute and then the next minute they just want to be friends. Such tricky creatures they are.

My friend going to Arizona said she was starting to resent her potential beau and I pointed out maybe he needed to move down a few notches because maybe he was showing her who he really was. We all agreed. Either way I hope her trip to Arizona goes well. Best of the the best, she gets a man she truly loves and adores. Worst of the worst, she just tans for a few days and has her time.

Either way the trip to the nail salon perked up my spirits. I felt better and went to hang with some of my boys.

Sigh, men are such simple, stupid creatures. I would say I hurt their feelings but that would involve having feelings.

Then again, men are funny too. They make me laugh. Especially when they bring me flowers when they screwed up. I need something like this to happen soon. There must be more gossip at the nail salon.

I must set feminism back hundreds of years.

Love
April
I Came, I Saw, I Sang: Memoirs of a Singing Telegram Delivery Girl
877-Buy-Book
www.buybooksontheweb.com
Available on Amazon

Come to my book signing
December 27, 2012 @ 7pm
Bethel Park Public Library
5100 W. Library Rd
Bethel Park, PA