April E. Brucker's Blog, page 67
December 6, 2012
Single and Proud
Hello,
My name is April and this is my blog.
I live in New York City with my ten puppet children.
I perform comedy, write books, and get on TV.
I tell you this because I am an insecure career woman.
Okay, not insecure but independent. I don't have a man to fix the things around my house. I don't have a man to wear on me like a mink coat. I'm all alone, and it's actually not all that bad. To give you a run down in adolescence I was not allowed to date. In middle school I was teased and bullied because my parents wouldn't let me talk to boys. Guys would ask me if I was a lesbian. And then they would throw things at me. I think this is why I have always stuck up for gay people when they have been bashed or bullied. While I have never been gay and have never come out, I can only imagine how hellacious such a thing must be when a person endures that torment all the time. Finally one day this mouth breathing moron asked me why I didn't like dick. I told him if it were me, him, and a woman on a desert island I would pick the lady. And it's not because I didn't like dick, I just didnt want his dick and if given the choice I would go with anything else. This shut him up and he left me alone after that. Looking back, my parents had the right idea. I went to NYU and have a career. That moron is now pumping my gas.
High school was a little different. The first two years sucked. I worked at the local television station, was involved in theatre, did ventriloquism, was involved in the literary magazine and wrote in the youth section for the local paper. Guys werent even on my mind. Many of my friends were guys and that made me laugh. But other than that there was no time for love. However, junior year I lost a bunch of weight and was nominated for Homecoming Court. While I didn't win guys paid attention and I liked it. Still, I was like, "WAH?"
My first year of college I was determined to find my future husband. A lot of the Jewish girls I went to school with were there to get their Mrs and were minoring in business to do so. I had never had a boyfriend and wanted one badly, but guys didnt seem to want me. Some would get my number and never call me. We went out once and I never heard again. Or sometimes they would assume I was oh so experienced. One time a guy invited me to his room to watch TV. We weren't watching TV. He wanted to have sex. I immediately freaked out and ran out of there. He was even more confused than I was. We actually ended up being great friends later on, but wow. Apparently watch TV was code for let's hook up.
At the end of college I found myself very confused. Everyone around me was slutty or a prude. I wasn't a slut and most certainly wasn't stuck up like many of the good girls. This left me very unhappy. I ended up at an open mic where this wannabe rockstar tried to pick me up. It turned out I was in head over my heels there too. The wannabe rockstar informed me that if I slept with him I could tell everyone we had a hot night before he became a star. Needless to say, he later gave up music and I am the one becoming the star.
And then there was the poser who had me walk him home in the rain only to ditch me after I got soaked. He was a stud muffin and upper class star, I was a no one barely making it with a mopette look who wanted to be Mae West. Years later as the tables have turned I think he is bitter about what happened, and now twists the tale that I stalked him for several blocks in order to soak his fifteen minutes of fame on gossip sites. None of it is true, but it makes him feel better about the fact that he acted like a jerk and has no career now.
Sophomore year I got my heart broken by a much older guy and we went back and fourth until eventually I saw he wasn't worth it. At the beginning of my junior year I met the guy who would become my ex-fiance. The whole relationship was a complete disaster and ended badly. I don't want to get into it but I have a different mailing address. After that was a list of losers so impressive I should be in Ripley's Believe it or Not. Some of these guys were probably subhuman and that is generous. I just didn't want to be this confused mess I was in my teen years. Someone told me being alone wasn't so bad. But she was ugly and I didnt want to believe her.
A little while later I dated a millionaire who was cheap as hell and said I would never make it as a ventriloquist. The hypocrite comes back everytime I am on national television to congratulate me.
After that I dated a lawyer/liar for a bit. That didn't end well.
I dated a dude who was too clingy.
I dated a model.
I dated a little bitch who cried like a woman and made me question why I didn't just become a lesbian. This dude had as many feelings as a woman but couldn't fix anything, I had to do the handy work.
Around the time I was twenty five I had an encounter with a celebrity hairdresser who told me that if I put the energy I put into dating losers into my career I would be a star. He was right. So I stopped dating losers and dating for the most part for a while and it has paid off.
These days I am single. I hear women whining about how if they don't have a husband by a certain point they have failed. My Aunt Diane said it best, "You don't need a man. I always tell my kids anyone can be married."
These women who don't want to be alone and think marriage is a measuring stick often will settle for anyone. I had the engagement. I had the rich man. I dated celebrities. At the end of the day a man is a man is a man. While it is wonderful to have someone special, it is not the end of the world if you don't. It doesn't mean you are a failure if you don't. Actually, it's like not having a certain pair of shoes. In the scheme of things it means nothing.
I actually enjoy life as a single person. Do I get lonely? Don't we all. But then I see my friends in relationships struggle with a partner who sometimes doesn't understand and think, "Do I really want that?"
And then I realize I have my freedom to do what I want. I don't want anyone. I am fine on my own. Maybe I am more Annie Oakley than Cinderella but damnit I am independent. I like my life. Having been on TV a few times I have men who have sent me emails telling me how beautiful I am and some have proposed. Others have come up to me in person bought me dinner and presents. I think it is adorable.
At the end of the day though, man or no man, I just have myself and I am okay with that person. I can do what I want when I want without having to answer to anyone.
I love my life. I am independent, successful, forward thinking, and career minded.
I had a man make me choose between him and the puppets and I told him buh-bye!
I am all by myself. I have my friends, family, and fans. I am not lonely. I am alone. And I am alright with that.
I am single, proud, and loving my life.
Love,
April
I Came, I Saw, I Sang: Memoirs of a Singing Telegram Delivery Girl
877-Buy-Book
www.buybooksontheweb.com
Amazon.com
Come to my book signing
Bethel Park Library
12-27-12
7pm
5100 W. Library Ave
Bethel Park, PA 15102
My name is April and this is my blog.
I live in New York City with my ten puppet children.
I perform comedy, write books, and get on TV.
I tell you this because I am an insecure career woman.
Okay, not insecure but independent. I don't have a man to fix the things around my house. I don't have a man to wear on me like a mink coat. I'm all alone, and it's actually not all that bad. To give you a run down in adolescence I was not allowed to date. In middle school I was teased and bullied because my parents wouldn't let me talk to boys. Guys would ask me if I was a lesbian. And then they would throw things at me. I think this is why I have always stuck up for gay people when they have been bashed or bullied. While I have never been gay and have never come out, I can only imagine how hellacious such a thing must be when a person endures that torment all the time. Finally one day this mouth breathing moron asked me why I didn't like dick. I told him if it were me, him, and a woman on a desert island I would pick the lady. And it's not because I didn't like dick, I just didnt want his dick and if given the choice I would go with anything else. This shut him up and he left me alone after that. Looking back, my parents had the right idea. I went to NYU and have a career. That moron is now pumping my gas.
High school was a little different. The first two years sucked. I worked at the local television station, was involved in theatre, did ventriloquism, was involved in the literary magazine and wrote in the youth section for the local paper. Guys werent even on my mind. Many of my friends were guys and that made me laugh. But other than that there was no time for love. However, junior year I lost a bunch of weight and was nominated for Homecoming Court. While I didn't win guys paid attention and I liked it. Still, I was like, "WAH?"
My first year of college I was determined to find my future husband. A lot of the Jewish girls I went to school with were there to get their Mrs and were minoring in business to do so. I had never had a boyfriend and wanted one badly, but guys didnt seem to want me. Some would get my number and never call me. We went out once and I never heard again. Or sometimes they would assume I was oh so experienced. One time a guy invited me to his room to watch TV. We weren't watching TV. He wanted to have sex. I immediately freaked out and ran out of there. He was even more confused than I was. We actually ended up being great friends later on, but wow. Apparently watch TV was code for let's hook up.
At the end of college I found myself very confused. Everyone around me was slutty or a prude. I wasn't a slut and most certainly wasn't stuck up like many of the good girls. This left me very unhappy. I ended up at an open mic where this wannabe rockstar tried to pick me up. It turned out I was in head over my heels there too. The wannabe rockstar informed me that if I slept with him I could tell everyone we had a hot night before he became a star. Needless to say, he later gave up music and I am the one becoming the star.
And then there was the poser who had me walk him home in the rain only to ditch me after I got soaked. He was a stud muffin and upper class star, I was a no one barely making it with a mopette look who wanted to be Mae West. Years later as the tables have turned I think he is bitter about what happened, and now twists the tale that I stalked him for several blocks in order to soak his fifteen minutes of fame on gossip sites. None of it is true, but it makes him feel better about the fact that he acted like a jerk and has no career now.
Sophomore year I got my heart broken by a much older guy and we went back and fourth until eventually I saw he wasn't worth it. At the beginning of my junior year I met the guy who would become my ex-fiance. The whole relationship was a complete disaster and ended badly. I don't want to get into it but I have a different mailing address. After that was a list of losers so impressive I should be in Ripley's Believe it or Not. Some of these guys were probably subhuman and that is generous. I just didn't want to be this confused mess I was in my teen years. Someone told me being alone wasn't so bad. But she was ugly and I didnt want to believe her.
A little while later I dated a millionaire who was cheap as hell and said I would never make it as a ventriloquist. The hypocrite comes back everytime I am on national television to congratulate me.
After that I dated a lawyer/liar for a bit. That didn't end well.
I dated a dude who was too clingy.
I dated a model.
I dated a little bitch who cried like a woman and made me question why I didn't just become a lesbian. This dude had as many feelings as a woman but couldn't fix anything, I had to do the handy work.
Around the time I was twenty five I had an encounter with a celebrity hairdresser who told me that if I put the energy I put into dating losers into my career I would be a star. He was right. So I stopped dating losers and dating for the most part for a while and it has paid off.
These days I am single. I hear women whining about how if they don't have a husband by a certain point they have failed. My Aunt Diane said it best, "You don't need a man. I always tell my kids anyone can be married."
These women who don't want to be alone and think marriage is a measuring stick often will settle for anyone. I had the engagement. I had the rich man. I dated celebrities. At the end of the day a man is a man is a man. While it is wonderful to have someone special, it is not the end of the world if you don't. It doesn't mean you are a failure if you don't. Actually, it's like not having a certain pair of shoes. In the scheme of things it means nothing.
I actually enjoy life as a single person. Do I get lonely? Don't we all. But then I see my friends in relationships struggle with a partner who sometimes doesn't understand and think, "Do I really want that?"
And then I realize I have my freedom to do what I want. I don't want anyone. I am fine on my own. Maybe I am more Annie Oakley than Cinderella but damnit I am independent. I like my life. Having been on TV a few times I have men who have sent me emails telling me how beautiful I am and some have proposed. Others have come up to me in person bought me dinner and presents. I think it is adorable.
At the end of the day though, man or no man, I just have myself and I am okay with that person. I can do what I want when I want without having to answer to anyone.
I love my life. I am independent, successful, forward thinking, and career minded.
I had a man make me choose between him and the puppets and I told him buh-bye!
I am all by myself. I have my friends, family, and fans. I am not lonely. I am alone. And I am alright with that.
I am single, proud, and loving my life.
Love,
April
I Came, I Saw, I Sang: Memoirs of a Singing Telegram Delivery Girl
877-Buy-Book
www.buybooksontheweb.com
Amazon.com
Come to my book signing
Bethel Park Library
12-27-12
7pm
5100 W. Library Ave
Bethel Park, PA 15102
December 5, 2012
Lighten Up
Some are calling this racist. Me personally, I think people need to loosen up because this is funny. Smart no, racist no, funny yes. God people are too sensitive these days.
But Penn State, or should I say Ped State, maybe you should be keeping an eye on your football program and the showers instead of the parties on campus.
I said lighten up, te he he.
April E. Brucker
I Came, I Saw, I Sang: Memoirs of a Singing Telegram Delivery Girl
877-Buy-Book
www.buybooksontheweb.com
Available on Amazon
Come to my book signing
12-27-12 @ 7pm
Bethel PArk Library
5100 W. Library Road
Bethel Park, PA
But Penn State, or should I say Ped State, maybe you should be keeping an eye on your football program and the showers instead of the parties on campus.
I said lighten up, te he he.
April E. BruckerI Came, I Saw, I Sang: Memoirs of a Singing Telegram Delivery Girl
877-Buy-Book
www.buybooksontheweb.com
Available on Amazon
Come to my book signing
12-27-12 @ 7pm
Bethel PArk Library
5100 W. Library Road
Bethel Park, PA
Twenty-First Century Fox
Monday I had my hair done. Yes, I went to the salon, Vibe West to be exact. I wanted to do something different. My twenties have been through all sorts of phases. In my early twenties I was what people call a mess. My weight yo-yoed, I was neurotic, and everything seemed like such a struggle. My comedy had an angry girl edge in those days. I was such an artist, or in the words of dentist turned comedian Mike King "in my mind."
My middle twenties were me sort of straightening myself out. I learned not to be so angry, life was too short and most of the time it wasnt that serious. Not to mention giving too much energy to idiots made me look and feel like an idiot. And I learned hard and fast that bad decisions did catch up to you,and I had to change my thinking pronto.
Now I am at the stage where the fruits of my labor are beginning to pay off. I have seen significant television time and still do. My book has been sold out twice on Amazon and my ebook is coming out soon. The tide is starting to shift. I am going from a joke to a comedian people actually like and respect. Plus I am able to laugh at myself more too. In this era of my life I am successful. I am unafraid. I am a hot, sexy puppet mama.
Oh and now I know what is in my checking account, and there is money coming in on the regs. Rent is not a hellacious chore. I don't pray that my rent check doesnt bounce.
It feels weird for me to say successful. It feels weird for me to say unafraid. It feels weird for me to say hot and sexy. None are words I had ever used to describe myself.
Whenever I did something good in my life, especially in my early twenties, I always waited for the other shoe to drop. I assumed it was an accident. Whenever people told me I was fearless and didnt care what other people thought of me I was like, "Are we talking about the same person? I assume everyone hates me all the time and that's why I don't call anyone." Hot and sexy? Did they know me in junior high when I struggled with my weight and girls threw tampons at me and guys asked me out as a joke? Do people know how terrible it is even after you lose weight to know you were once the fat girl? Should I mention I have a cry spot near my refrigerator? Dear Jesus God in heaven I am a mess. I still won't look at my junior high yearbook because the mean girls still give me stomach knots.
I guess when I was twenty six the tide started to change. I had a lot of good things lined up years before and they didn't happen. The ghosts of those always still follows me sometimes. I wonder what if? But looking back at it I know I wasn't ready. I would have screwed it up before it even started. Thank God I didnt get what I wanted back then.
But at twenty-six, after I started to get some television time I discovered hard and fast who my true friends were and werent. My true friends stuck by me of course. Then people I thought were my friends bad mouthed me wherever there was a keyboard coupled with internet. One even brought me to lunch and told me that I had become an egotistical jerk. It hurt my feelings. Was it even true? Then I realized that what was true wasn't that I was a mean and egotistical jerkface, but rather that he couldn't deal with the new and succesful April, the confident woman who had good self-esteem that didnt date losers. I wrote this friend and those like him off as a loss and never looked back.
I went through a period where I was a tad of an egomaniac, just to combat morons like that. But being an egomaniac is tiresome. Your favorite subject is pretty limited. The truth is a life in art is a journey, it is a ride. Is my life or my career what I thought it would be? No. But in a lot of ways it is better than anything I ever planned. The other night I was chatting with Stephanie Holmes and we were talking about comedy. We were talking about how it was hard to be taken seriously, especially as a woman. But the conversation concluded that me and my astro twin were both doing it, both making it happen. We were both out there as women following our dreams and not apologizing for accomplishing our goals.
Stephanie also called me "quite the business woman." It was a weird compliment for me. My house until yesterday looked akin to a World War I bunker on the Western Front. I have been running around like a mad woman. I accidentally tripped over my own shoes. But the rest of the world wants to compliment me because things are happening. I will take it.
At the hair salon, where I went blonde, platinum blonde, my hairdresser Denis Loyola told me, "Girl, you make it happen." Does he know that I shake in my boots with fear of utter failure? Does he know sometimes I take a shot in the dark because sometimes I don't know what the hell I am doing? But the man was giving me credit and making me pretty.
As the hair product on my head made my scalp slightly tingle, it occurred to me that a hairstyle gives someone a new lease on life. At twenty six I stopped being the innocent struggler, an adjective someone used to describe me in an acting workshop once (I called them a slut to get back at them and said I wasn't judging), but perhaps they were correct. That person died and was replaced by someone who was achieving some success but questioned whether or not she deserved it. However two years after the fact I don't apologize for being who I am and am not scared. I work hard and deserve everything I get. If you say I am a jerkface because I am not a pathetic floor crawler I do not need you in my life.
At the same time, I can be that successful woman and be compassionate and humble. Good deal.
Oh and about my new style, I look less like an angry chick writer and more like the Sex in the City type writer. The Sex in the City type writer gets a movie, and the angry chick got the Lilith Fair. Tough call. But I don't like granola do I'll go with the movie.
I am strong, assertive, talented, smart, successful, and am a hot and sexy puppet mama.
I am the twenty-first century fox.
My hair is platinum blonde and it demands I sexify myself.
Okay, maybe I am getting a tad carried away. Either way, check out my photos. Much love to Denis Loyola and Vibe West
Love
April
I Came, I Saw, I Sang: Memoirs of a Singing Telegram Delivery Girl
877-Buy-Book
www.buybooksontheweb.com
Amazon.com
Watch for my ebook
Come to my book signing
12-27-12 @ 7
Bethel PArk Public Library
5100 West Library Ave
Bethel Park Pa
My middle twenties were me sort of straightening myself out. I learned not to be so angry, life was too short and most of the time it wasnt that serious. Not to mention giving too much energy to idiots made me look and feel like an idiot. And I learned hard and fast that bad decisions did catch up to you,and I had to change my thinking pronto.
Now I am at the stage where the fruits of my labor are beginning to pay off. I have seen significant television time and still do. My book has been sold out twice on Amazon and my ebook is coming out soon. The tide is starting to shift. I am going from a joke to a comedian people actually like and respect. Plus I am able to laugh at myself more too. In this era of my life I am successful. I am unafraid. I am a hot, sexy puppet mama.
Oh and now I know what is in my checking account, and there is money coming in on the regs. Rent is not a hellacious chore. I don't pray that my rent check doesnt bounce.
It feels weird for me to say successful. It feels weird for me to say unafraid. It feels weird for me to say hot and sexy. None are words I had ever used to describe myself.
Whenever I did something good in my life, especially in my early twenties, I always waited for the other shoe to drop. I assumed it was an accident. Whenever people told me I was fearless and didnt care what other people thought of me I was like, "Are we talking about the same person? I assume everyone hates me all the time and that's why I don't call anyone." Hot and sexy? Did they know me in junior high when I struggled with my weight and girls threw tampons at me and guys asked me out as a joke? Do people know how terrible it is even after you lose weight to know you were once the fat girl? Should I mention I have a cry spot near my refrigerator? Dear Jesus God in heaven I am a mess. I still won't look at my junior high yearbook because the mean girls still give me stomach knots.
I guess when I was twenty six the tide started to change. I had a lot of good things lined up years before and they didn't happen. The ghosts of those always still follows me sometimes. I wonder what if? But looking back at it I know I wasn't ready. I would have screwed it up before it even started. Thank God I didnt get what I wanted back then.
But at twenty-six, after I started to get some television time I discovered hard and fast who my true friends were and werent. My true friends stuck by me of course. Then people I thought were my friends bad mouthed me wherever there was a keyboard coupled with internet. One even brought me to lunch and told me that I had become an egotistical jerk. It hurt my feelings. Was it even true? Then I realized that what was true wasn't that I was a mean and egotistical jerkface, but rather that he couldn't deal with the new and succesful April, the confident woman who had good self-esteem that didnt date losers. I wrote this friend and those like him off as a loss and never looked back.
I went through a period where I was a tad of an egomaniac, just to combat morons like that. But being an egomaniac is tiresome. Your favorite subject is pretty limited. The truth is a life in art is a journey, it is a ride. Is my life or my career what I thought it would be? No. But in a lot of ways it is better than anything I ever planned. The other night I was chatting with Stephanie Holmes and we were talking about comedy. We were talking about how it was hard to be taken seriously, especially as a woman. But the conversation concluded that me and my astro twin were both doing it, both making it happen. We were both out there as women following our dreams and not apologizing for accomplishing our goals.
Stephanie also called me "quite the business woman." It was a weird compliment for me. My house until yesterday looked akin to a World War I bunker on the Western Front. I have been running around like a mad woman. I accidentally tripped over my own shoes. But the rest of the world wants to compliment me because things are happening. I will take it.
At the hair salon, where I went blonde, platinum blonde, my hairdresser Denis Loyola told me, "Girl, you make it happen." Does he know that I shake in my boots with fear of utter failure? Does he know sometimes I take a shot in the dark because sometimes I don't know what the hell I am doing? But the man was giving me credit and making me pretty.
As the hair product on my head made my scalp slightly tingle, it occurred to me that a hairstyle gives someone a new lease on life. At twenty six I stopped being the innocent struggler, an adjective someone used to describe me in an acting workshop once (I called them a slut to get back at them and said I wasn't judging), but perhaps they were correct. That person died and was replaced by someone who was achieving some success but questioned whether or not she deserved it. However two years after the fact I don't apologize for being who I am and am not scared. I work hard and deserve everything I get. If you say I am a jerkface because I am not a pathetic floor crawler I do not need you in my life.
At the same time, I can be that successful woman and be compassionate and humble. Good deal.
Oh and about my new style, I look less like an angry chick writer and more like the Sex in the City type writer. The Sex in the City type writer gets a movie, and the angry chick got the Lilith Fair. Tough call. But I don't like granola do I'll go with the movie.
I am strong, assertive, talented, smart, successful, and am a hot and sexy puppet mama.
I am the twenty-first century fox.
My hair is platinum blonde and it demands I sexify myself.
Okay, maybe I am getting a tad carried away. Either way, check out my photos. Much love to Denis Loyola and Vibe West
Love
April
I Came, I Saw, I Sang: Memoirs of a Singing Telegram Delivery Girl
877-Buy-Book
www.buybooksontheweb.com
Amazon.com
Watch for my ebook
Come to my book signing
12-27-12 @ 7
Bethel PArk Public Library
5100 West Library Ave
Bethel Park Pa
December 4, 2012
Javon Belcher-How and Why?
Everyone is talking about the Javon Belcher tragedy and it is a tragedy indeed. His girlfriend is dead, he is dead, and his daughter is left without a father. It was a murder/suicide. Javon Belcher was a bright student at the University of Maine and was a part of an organization that fought against violence. In addition, he majored in child development which means he had an idea of what this would do to his young daughter. Belcher went on to play football alongside the likes of Brady Quinn in the pros.
The question is, why?
The answer, this was a young man struggling with mental illness. In our country mental illness has a stigma against it. We judge the mentally ill. We say someone is "schizo"or "nuts." We use crazy in the punchline of jokes. We laugh at celebrities like Katt Williams when they have public meltdowns as a result of stress and poor mental health. In a way we don't take mental illness seriously. It's not cancer. Plus when we speak of cancer, cancer victims have no fault. Yet someone suffering in the silent prison of bi-polar did this to themselves, not genetics.
As an added bonus, many times people with mental illness do not believe that they are sick. In part it is because as a society we tell them to stop being so depressed and to start doing a happy dance. Also, there are those who don't take their medication because either it makes them feel different, not better, and at the urging of those around them who say, "Toughen up." Often this comes with serious consequences.
Belcher in many ways seems to be someone suffering from a mood disorder from what I read. He had violent mood swings, often associated with bipolar disorder. In addition, on occasion from what I understand he had elevated moods and was either happy go lucky or depressed and was using lots of alcohol to cure his pain. Javon Belcher had no where to turn. No one to talk to. Javon Belcher had a tough childhood raised by a single mother in Long Island and had overcome that to become a star college player and a promising pro player. He had a beautiful girlfriend and a young child. Why couldn't he just do a happy dance? It's because that is not the way mental illness works.
Why didn't Javon Belcher reach out? I believe it was shame and the stigma attached. He was a hero to so many and a tough guy on the grid iron. Seeking counseling for depression did not fit into the profile that others created for him, and moreso himself. Javon probably was living in hell. Unlike cancer or any physical illness, you sometimes can't put a finger on your symptoms or where they are coming from because you don't even know.
We laugh at mental illness but it is no joke. My friend Joe, a talented artist, took his own life last summer because he couldn't stand life with drug addiction and bi-polar depression any longer. Joe got me to write again and it rips my heart out that he is not here to enjoy my book with me. A former boyfriend of mine who I call Holden Caulfield, who I really loved, suffered bi-polar depression and refused to take his meds. He is a nomadic drug addict now that people laugh at and it hurts me greatly.
We see how untreated mental illness can be dangerous on a larger level. We saw it during the massacre at a movie theater in Colorado. That young man was receiving help but unfortunately the shrink too overpaid and too busy, didnt get the package with the laid out plans.
Bottom line, the issue is not guns. It is mental illness. It is the stigma we put on it in this country. It is the fact that insurance companies do not cover drug/alcohol/mental health counseling. It is the fact we feel it is a punchline to a joke. But then something like this happens and we ask why?
Answer: We need to learn to understand that mental illness is a chemical imbalance,not a character defect. People suffering need and deserve compassion and love. Like anyone else, they need accessible, appropriate, and affordable treatment. They also need the medication they deserve, and those around them need to understand that this is not a choice. If they want a functional person that person needs to take their meds and as a society we need to remove the judgment pronto.
I pray Javon Belcher and his girlfriend have found peace in the hereafter. I pray that we do not blame this on guns but rather use this as a time to become compassionate and knowledgeable.
Love
April E. Brucker
I Came, I Saw, I Sang: Memoirs of a Singing Telegram Delivery Girl
www.buybooksontheweb.com
877-Buy-Book
Amazon.com
Come to my book signing
December 27,2012 @ 7pm
Bethel Park Library
5100 W.Library Ave
Bethel Park, PA 15102
The question is, why?
The answer, this was a young man struggling with mental illness. In our country mental illness has a stigma against it. We judge the mentally ill. We say someone is "schizo"or "nuts." We use crazy in the punchline of jokes. We laugh at celebrities like Katt Williams when they have public meltdowns as a result of stress and poor mental health. In a way we don't take mental illness seriously. It's not cancer. Plus when we speak of cancer, cancer victims have no fault. Yet someone suffering in the silent prison of bi-polar did this to themselves, not genetics.
As an added bonus, many times people with mental illness do not believe that they are sick. In part it is because as a society we tell them to stop being so depressed and to start doing a happy dance. Also, there are those who don't take their medication because either it makes them feel different, not better, and at the urging of those around them who say, "Toughen up." Often this comes with serious consequences.
Belcher in many ways seems to be someone suffering from a mood disorder from what I read. He had violent mood swings, often associated with bipolar disorder. In addition, on occasion from what I understand he had elevated moods and was either happy go lucky or depressed and was using lots of alcohol to cure his pain. Javon Belcher had no where to turn. No one to talk to. Javon Belcher had a tough childhood raised by a single mother in Long Island and had overcome that to become a star college player and a promising pro player. He had a beautiful girlfriend and a young child. Why couldn't he just do a happy dance? It's because that is not the way mental illness works.
Why didn't Javon Belcher reach out? I believe it was shame and the stigma attached. He was a hero to so many and a tough guy on the grid iron. Seeking counseling for depression did not fit into the profile that others created for him, and moreso himself. Javon probably was living in hell. Unlike cancer or any physical illness, you sometimes can't put a finger on your symptoms or where they are coming from because you don't even know.
We laugh at mental illness but it is no joke. My friend Joe, a talented artist, took his own life last summer because he couldn't stand life with drug addiction and bi-polar depression any longer. Joe got me to write again and it rips my heart out that he is not here to enjoy my book with me. A former boyfriend of mine who I call Holden Caulfield, who I really loved, suffered bi-polar depression and refused to take his meds. He is a nomadic drug addict now that people laugh at and it hurts me greatly.
We see how untreated mental illness can be dangerous on a larger level. We saw it during the massacre at a movie theater in Colorado. That young man was receiving help but unfortunately the shrink too overpaid and too busy, didnt get the package with the laid out plans.
Bottom line, the issue is not guns. It is mental illness. It is the stigma we put on it in this country. It is the fact that insurance companies do not cover drug/alcohol/mental health counseling. It is the fact we feel it is a punchline to a joke. But then something like this happens and we ask why?
Answer: We need to learn to understand that mental illness is a chemical imbalance,not a character defect. People suffering need and deserve compassion and love. Like anyone else, they need accessible, appropriate, and affordable treatment. They also need the medication they deserve, and those around them need to understand that this is not a choice. If they want a functional person that person needs to take their meds and as a society we need to remove the judgment pronto.
I pray Javon Belcher and his girlfriend have found peace in the hereafter. I pray that we do not blame this on guns but rather use this as a time to become compassionate and knowledgeable.
Love
April E. Brucker
I Came, I Saw, I Sang: Memoirs of a Singing Telegram Delivery Girl
www.buybooksontheweb.com
877-Buy-Book
Amazon.com
Come to my book signing
December 27,2012 @ 7pm
Bethel Park Library
5100 W.Library Ave
Bethel Park, PA 15102
Doing the Right Thing Don't Always Get You a Gold Star
Officer Lawrence DePrimo saw a homeless man without shoes on a cold, November day. The twenty five year old cop knew he was freezing under his two layers. DePrimo asked the man if he had something to cover his feet. The man responded saying that he never had shoes. This prompted the young officer to go to the Sketcher store, buy the man a one hundred dollar pair of boots, and then gave them to him. The act was caught on camera and made the nice looking, nice guy of New York City's finest a national hero.
But there is more to the story as it unfolds. Reporters and people around the world captured by this tale of good will began to follow the story. However, as they did they caught Jeffrey Hillman a week later without shoes once again. Instead of being thankful the degenerate said, "Boots like these could get me killed on the street." He first told some he hid them. Then he said he threw them out. Finally Jeffrey Hillman said he sold them.
It gets worse.
Jeffrey Hillman isn't even homeless. The once goofy high school basketball star and former army veteran was in and out of a transitional housing unit before social services for veterans got him an apartment in the Bronx. Despite having a roof over his head and a warm bed he still chooses to pan handle. Yes, Officer DePrimo did the right thing, but I am sure he feels like a schmuck right now.
But the right thing doesn't always have a reward.
A few years ago a friend of mine was having an extramarital affair, and this was the latest chapter in a marriage that was unhappy. With a husband refusing to work, she was facing eviction. It was raining and pouring. Needless to say, I became her crying shoulder. Trying to make it in the comedy world, she lacked the goods onstage and was often ripped apart by our peer group of vultures. Being a true friend I always defended her. Even when she sucked the living, breathing life out of me, I still stuck by her. Well she repaid my kindness by trying to bad mouth me to a club owner because I began producing a show that rivaled hers. Not to mention when I got television time that in her humble opinion I did not deserve she stopped speaking to me. So much for friendship.
Then there was that other time where a comedian I respected, talented but washed up, appeared on my webcast. I had been a fan of her work and had become connected with her through my friend Derek. I assumed she would be cool. She was but when the camera began rolling she focused on the fact she was not being paid. Meanwhile she knew this when she came on the show. Afterwards she wanted to talk my ear off and I couldn't get rid of her. Needless to say,the video went up and in those days I was low tech. Well she filed a complaint on youtube to say I used her image without her permission and made me take the video down. It was no problem, I have eighty others. However, people who care about image permission typically have no career and lots of time to worry about that crap because they aren't working. She's on a roster of a manager who represents hasbeens when their careers need a final resting place. She says he is the greatest guy ever. I hope she remembers that when they are watering the flowers near the tombstone that used to be her career, or her five minutes of fame. Either way, I have friends and get invited to places that she can only get a glimpse at on television.
Of course then there were the times I was kind to people who everyone was unkind to. And there were times those people came and stabbed me in the back as a thank you. One woman in particular, a satellite comic who claims to be molested by her father for attention and often changes the story, used to show up at places weeping wildly. I used to comfort her and let her know it was alright. Needless to say, it would come back to bite me. We were performing one night and she went up before me. As I heard her set a joke in there sounded a little familiar and then I realized it was mine! Word for word. I said there were only so many ideas in the world. But no, she stole my joke. End of story.
Sometimes we do the right thing and we get screwed entirely. There used to be a kid who hung around our crew and was on the edge. People merely tolerated him and his antics. Like Jeffrey Hillman, he insisted he was a street kid when later it turned out he had a house. Of course there was the far fetched stories and people who tried to help him. One guy I know got him a cellphone which was an epic fail, and the kid ended up selling it. This dude shows up in my hood and we talk. As usual he is down on his luck and I did the nice thing of buying him dinner. Leaving the money on the table for the meal, I left. He walked out after me and I thought nothing of it. I came back the next day with a friend and the waiter said, "You accidentally left without paying yesterday." WTF?!?!?! Well, I thought about it. Had the money fallen on the floor? Oh no. That lil SOB took it and put it in his pocket?!?!?! I had to look like a schmuck at my home diner! Lucky he had to flee or else I was going to strangle him. Wait, no wonder everyone wanted to murder this dude. I relayed the story to our crew and they concurred, and this was why no one wanted to help him.
My point is, sometimes when a person is down and out for a reason. Sometimes the world is taking a great big dump on a person for a reason. Sometimes no one wants anything to do with a certain individual and there is a reason. Sometimes a person may be an outcast and it's not just because they are different, it's because they are a great big gaping tool, again there is a reason!
On the flipside, doing the right thing is never a loss of time or energy. You might not always get the thank you or the applause. Officer DePrimo never got the thank you or the applause. He didnt even think anyone was watching. Sure, Jeffrey Hillman sold the boots. But at the end of the day just like any decent person, Officer DePrimo can look at himself in the mirror and know that his side of the street is clean.
Yes, you might not always get a gold star for doing the right thing, but you get peace of mind. And in the scheme of things that is priceless.
Love
April
I Came, I Saw, I Sang: Memoirs of a Singing Telegram Delivery Girl
www.buybookontheweb.com
877-Buy-Book
Available on Amazon.
Come to my book signing
December 27, 2012
Bethel Park Library
5100 W. Library Ave
Bethel Park, PA
15102
But there is more to the story as it unfolds. Reporters and people around the world captured by this tale of good will began to follow the story. However, as they did they caught Jeffrey Hillman a week later without shoes once again. Instead of being thankful the degenerate said, "Boots like these could get me killed on the street." He first told some he hid them. Then he said he threw them out. Finally Jeffrey Hillman said he sold them.
It gets worse.
Jeffrey Hillman isn't even homeless. The once goofy high school basketball star and former army veteran was in and out of a transitional housing unit before social services for veterans got him an apartment in the Bronx. Despite having a roof over his head and a warm bed he still chooses to pan handle. Yes, Officer DePrimo did the right thing, but I am sure he feels like a schmuck right now.
But the right thing doesn't always have a reward.
A few years ago a friend of mine was having an extramarital affair, and this was the latest chapter in a marriage that was unhappy. With a husband refusing to work, she was facing eviction. It was raining and pouring. Needless to say, I became her crying shoulder. Trying to make it in the comedy world, she lacked the goods onstage and was often ripped apart by our peer group of vultures. Being a true friend I always defended her. Even when she sucked the living, breathing life out of me, I still stuck by her. Well she repaid my kindness by trying to bad mouth me to a club owner because I began producing a show that rivaled hers. Not to mention when I got television time that in her humble opinion I did not deserve she stopped speaking to me. So much for friendship.
Then there was that other time where a comedian I respected, talented but washed up, appeared on my webcast. I had been a fan of her work and had become connected with her through my friend Derek. I assumed she would be cool. She was but when the camera began rolling she focused on the fact she was not being paid. Meanwhile she knew this when she came on the show. Afterwards she wanted to talk my ear off and I couldn't get rid of her. Needless to say,the video went up and in those days I was low tech. Well she filed a complaint on youtube to say I used her image without her permission and made me take the video down. It was no problem, I have eighty others. However, people who care about image permission typically have no career and lots of time to worry about that crap because they aren't working. She's on a roster of a manager who represents hasbeens when their careers need a final resting place. She says he is the greatest guy ever. I hope she remembers that when they are watering the flowers near the tombstone that used to be her career, or her five minutes of fame. Either way, I have friends and get invited to places that she can only get a glimpse at on television.
Of course then there were the times I was kind to people who everyone was unkind to. And there were times those people came and stabbed me in the back as a thank you. One woman in particular, a satellite comic who claims to be molested by her father for attention and often changes the story, used to show up at places weeping wildly. I used to comfort her and let her know it was alright. Needless to say, it would come back to bite me. We were performing one night and she went up before me. As I heard her set a joke in there sounded a little familiar and then I realized it was mine! Word for word. I said there were only so many ideas in the world. But no, she stole my joke. End of story.
Sometimes we do the right thing and we get screwed entirely. There used to be a kid who hung around our crew and was on the edge. People merely tolerated him and his antics. Like Jeffrey Hillman, he insisted he was a street kid when later it turned out he had a house. Of course there was the far fetched stories and people who tried to help him. One guy I know got him a cellphone which was an epic fail, and the kid ended up selling it. This dude shows up in my hood and we talk. As usual he is down on his luck and I did the nice thing of buying him dinner. Leaving the money on the table for the meal, I left. He walked out after me and I thought nothing of it. I came back the next day with a friend and the waiter said, "You accidentally left without paying yesterday." WTF?!?!?! Well, I thought about it. Had the money fallen on the floor? Oh no. That lil SOB took it and put it in his pocket?!?!?! I had to look like a schmuck at my home diner! Lucky he had to flee or else I was going to strangle him. Wait, no wonder everyone wanted to murder this dude. I relayed the story to our crew and they concurred, and this was why no one wanted to help him.
My point is, sometimes when a person is down and out for a reason. Sometimes the world is taking a great big dump on a person for a reason. Sometimes no one wants anything to do with a certain individual and there is a reason. Sometimes a person may be an outcast and it's not just because they are different, it's because they are a great big gaping tool, again there is a reason!
On the flipside, doing the right thing is never a loss of time or energy. You might not always get the thank you or the applause. Officer DePrimo never got the thank you or the applause. He didnt even think anyone was watching. Sure, Jeffrey Hillman sold the boots. But at the end of the day just like any decent person, Officer DePrimo can look at himself in the mirror and know that his side of the street is clean.
Yes, you might not always get a gold star for doing the right thing, but you get peace of mind. And in the scheme of things that is priceless.
Love
April
I Came, I Saw, I Sang: Memoirs of a Singing Telegram Delivery Girl
www.buybookontheweb.com
877-Buy-Book
Available on Amazon.
Come to my book signing
December 27, 2012
Bethel Park Library
5100 W. Library Ave
Bethel Park, PA
15102
December 3, 2012
Heisman Watch-Who Are You Voting For?
Johnny Manziel aka Johnny Football
A multi-sport athlete in high school who's prowess on the football field made him legendary, this freshmen QB from Texas A & M was christened Johnny Football by his fans. Much like Adrian Petersen, he is known for his speed and also being nominated for the award as a freshmen. His brag board of stats include being the youngest QB to put together 3000 yards passing and 1000 yards rushing. In addition, Mr. Johnny Football also has 3419 yards passing and 1181 yards rushing. He has thrown for 24 touchdowns and rushed for 19. Already drawing comparisons to Robert Griffin III or RG3, his talent cannot be denied. Tebow and Bradford won out of the gate. Neither have brag worthy careers but Adrian Petersen did not and has the better pro-career. Either way, Johnny Football has a bright future ahead of him and is favored Saturday night. And I say, "Go Johnny, go!"
Jarvis Jones
This Georgia Bull Dog has not had an easy ride to the top. Originally on the USC roster, he had a spinal chord injury and was not cleared to play. Wanting to achieve his dreams, he requested a transfer to the University of Georgia and the rest is history. In between that his brother Darnell Kitchen was murdered. However, despite the hardships he has faced life has gotten better as he has proven himself on the field. Both tremendous in size and quick on his feet, he draws comparison to Clay Matthews as well as Von Miller. While he is probably not going to win, Jarvis reminds me of past candidate Darren McFadden. While Darren did not win he had a certain star quality that could not be denied both on and off the field because he was a survivor. And no matter what happens he will be doing just fine.
Stepfan Taylor
Stanford University's Stepfan Taylor is everything that one should look for in a specialty back. Fast and agile, he can outrun anyone and outrush anyone. Not to mention like a mythological Mercury he is quick on his feet running through and around tackles. Stepping up now that former Heisman candidate Andrew Luck is out of the picture, he has drawn comparisons to Darren Sproles. In his career Taylor has rushed 1364 yards, received for 215 yards, and 13 touchdowns, beating the record of the man he is compared to. On the smaller side with tremendous speed and agility, he is reminiscent of dearly departed Heisman Winner Ernie Davis. Football needs good runners and we have one here. Now let's see if he runs away with the Heisman Saturday night.
Ka'Deem Carey
While he may be a mere 5'10" this Arizona Bobcat is making up for it in speed and agility. Having a prolific season of 1757 yards rushing and 20 touchdowns, he has an impressive 33 catches for 228 yards. With great speed, he is able to catch tackles left and right. However, the problem is with his catching. Sometimes he tends to have butterfingers. But as I remember Heisman winner Reggie Bush had the same problem from time to time and now he is doing quite well in the pros. As a player, he fits the profile of Shane Vereen, smaller but quick as they come. Much like his pro-doppleganger who does not have great hands as well, he is used in situations that require great speed. Catching is only a small thing when you look at how this guy can move on the field. I don't think he is going to win the Heisman, but with the right combination of coaches and people who know how to use his gifts, when it comes to the pros, in the words of Jimmie Walker he will be "DY-NO-MITE."
Tavon Austin
Tavon Austin of The West Virginia Mountaineers has already been called the Best Player not to win a Heisman. A wide receiver and return specialist, he might be on the small side but don't be fooled, his speed is incredible as he runs through and around tackle situations. I know I have cited Ernie Davis before, but when I see speed like this I think of the Elmira Express during the Orange Bowl simply running around and jumping over people. Already drawing comparisons to Mike Wallace, Tavon has posted 1149 yards receiving and 12 touchdowns on 106 catches. Not bad. Either way, Wallace is doing well with the Steelers and if Austin goes pro he will do well wherever he goes.
Kenjon Barner
Kenjon Barner is favored number two to win the Heisman. This University of Oregon running back succeeded former teammate LaMichael James in the superstar seat. Built with the same small stature and speed as his former teammate, Kenjon has rushed 1624 yards for 21 touchdowns. The thing is, no one knows if they are good players, or products of coach Chip Kelly's gun 'n' run system. While Kenjon has the speed plus instinct of his former star teammate LaMichael, Mr. James has yet to snap for the 49ers this season, so the real pro-comparison isn't a good one. However, Kenjon is always smiling in photos and has a bubbly, happy demeanor that always comes across when interviewed. Win or lose, I like this guy and am hoping he does well just cause I like him.
Marqis Lee
Marqis Lee of USC may be a long shot to win the award but he is one I am rooting for because he has perhaps the most compelling backstory. The child of two deaf parents who grew up in poverty, Marqis, a CODA (Child of Deaf Adults) and communicates in both spoken dialogue and sign. His father was hardly around and he was shuffled from relative to relative. When I hear a hard knock story like this I think of Mikey Oher from The Blind Side and want the guy to do well no matter what. Despite accomplishment of 112 catches, 1680 yards, and 14 touchdowns USC's losing season will drag down his record. Sure, he is small but so was LaMichael James, Colt McCoy and of course the one who I mentioned several times-the late great Ernie Davis. Marqis might not win, but his backstory is sure to make him a fan favorite, and he has the adversity vote in my opinion.
Braxton Miller
Braxton Miller of the Ohio State Buckeyes is one Heisman dark horse that we cannot rule out. Since 2002, he has lead his team in a 12-0 season. One of the best dual threat players in the Big Ten, Miller has completed 58.3 percent of his passes, 2039 yard, and 15 touchdowns. He also has 1271 yards and 15 touchdowns on the ground. Braxton Miller is a reminder former Buckeye QB and Heisman Winner Troy Smith. While not always the best passer, he got the job down. Let's hope Braxton Miller doesn't end up like the man who's stats he shadows, a winner only in football but not in life. Smith threw games and was suspended for gambling during his tenure on Ohio state, and who's pro-career came to an end with injury and a diva attitude. Let's hope the same fate doesn't befall Braxton Miller.
Collin Klein
This Kansas State QB and big bodied superstar reminiscent of Tebow is favored to win. The Kansas state senior is a candidate that steal my heart for several reason. One he is cute. Two he plays on the same team as his sophomore running back brother Kyle making football a family affair like the Manning Clan. Three, he plays piano, madolin,and violin killing the dumb jock myth. As a QB he 2036 yards passing, 787 yards rushing, and 34 touchdowns. Mr. Klein holds Kansas State records and has shattered the past records of former Heisman winner Ricky Williams. The things working against Klein are his size. At 6'5" he has more the body of a tight end than a QB and some critics say he does not have the instincts of a next level quarterback. Also after a loss to Baylor some say he is out of running for the award. Either way I believe he is impressive and has a good future ahead of him. With some work instinct can be taught. And we all have a strike or two against us. Maybe Collin Klein can work with his.
Manti T'eo
T'eo is nominated and a lot of people have a lot to say about why he shouldn't be. This Latter Day Saint from Hawaii plays only defense for Notre Dame. Many argue that he is in better company and why he is being nominated rather than his more talented teammates? Not to mention he is lacking in the speed department. Say what you will but his on the field instinct is amazing, and it probably tops any player on this list. Not to mention he is having an amazing senior season, playing a large role in Notre Dame's perfect record. In addition T'eo has amazing field vision and knows how to get the ball and what to do with it on every play. He might not have the stats the rest of the men on this lineup but again he knows what to do and when to do it. Sounds a lot like Lawrence Timmons from the Steelers. I want to vote for him just to see him win and anger some people. It's called a Sanjaya complex. I like him just cause.....
Who do you think will win?
Love
April
I Came, I Saw, I Sang: Memoirs of a Singing Telegram Delivery Girl
877-Buy-Book
www.buybooksontheweb.com
Amazon.com
Come to my signing
12-27-2012
Bethel Park Library
5100 w. library ave
bethel park, pa
15102
A multi-sport athlete in high school who's prowess on the football field made him legendary, this freshmen QB from Texas A & M was christened Johnny Football by his fans. Much like Adrian Petersen, he is known for his speed and also being nominated for the award as a freshmen. His brag board of stats include being the youngest QB to put together 3000 yards passing and 1000 yards rushing. In addition, Mr. Johnny Football also has 3419 yards passing and 1181 yards rushing. He has thrown for 24 touchdowns and rushed for 19. Already drawing comparisons to Robert Griffin III or RG3, his talent cannot be denied. Tebow and Bradford won out of the gate. Neither have brag worthy careers but Adrian Petersen did not and has the better pro-career. Either way, Johnny Football has a bright future ahead of him and is favored Saturday night. And I say, "Go Johnny, go!"Jarvis Jones
This Georgia Bull Dog has not had an easy ride to the top. Originally on the USC roster, he had a spinal chord injury and was not cleared to play. Wanting to achieve his dreams, he requested a transfer to the University of Georgia and the rest is history. In between that his brother Darnell Kitchen was murdered. However, despite the hardships he has faced life has gotten better as he has proven himself on the field. Both tremendous in size and quick on his feet, he draws comparison to Clay Matthews as well as Von Miller. While he is probably not going to win, Jarvis reminds me of past candidate Darren McFadden. While Darren did not win he had a certain star quality that could not be denied both on and off the field because he was a survivor. And no matter what happens he will be doing just fine.Stepfan Taylor
Stanford University's Stepfan Taylor is everything that one should look for in a specialty back. Fast and agile, he can outrun anyone and outrush anyone. Not to mention like a mythological Mercury he is quick on his feet running through and around tackles. Stepping up now that former Heisman candidate Andrew Luck is out of the picture, he has drawn comparisons to Darren Sproles. In his career Taylor has rushed 1364 yards, received for 215 yards, and 13 touchdowns, beating the record of the man he is compared to. On the smaller side with tremendous speed and agility, he is reminiscent of dearly departed Heisman Winner Ernie Davis. Football needs good runners and we have one here. Now let's see if he runs away with the Heisman Saturday night.Ka'Deem Carey
While he may be a mere 5'10" this Arizona Bobcat is making up for it in speed and agility. Having a prolific season of 1757 yards rushing and 20 touchdowns, he has an impressive 33 catches for 228 yards. With great speed, he is able to catch tackles left and right. However, the problem is with his catching. Sometimes he tends to have butterfingers. But as I remember Heisman winner Reggie Bush had the same problem from time to time and now he is doing quite well in the pros. As a player, he fits the profile of Shane Vereen, smaller but quick as they come. Much like his pro-doppleganger who does not have great hands as well, he is used in situations that require great speed. Catching is only a small thing when you look at how this guy can move on the field. I don't think he is going to win the Heisman, but with the right combination of coaches and people who know how to use his gifts, when it comes to the pros, in the words of Jimmie Walker he will be "DY-NO-MITE."Tavon Austin
Tavon Austin of The West Virginia Mountaineers has already been called the Best Player not to win a Heisman. A wide receiver and return specialist, he might be on the small side but don't be fooled, his speed is incredible as he runs through and around tackle situations. I know I have cited Ernie Davis before, but when I see speed like this I think of the Elmira Express during the Orange Bowl simply running around and jumping over people. Already drawing comparisons to Mike Wallace, Tavon has posted 1149 yards receiving and 12 touchdowns on 106 catches. Not bad. Either way, Wallace is doing well with the Steelers and if Austin goes pro he will do well wherever he goes.Kenjon Barner
Kenjon Barner is favored number two to win the Heisman. This University of Oregon running back succeeded former teammate LaMichael James in the superstar seat. Built with the same small stature and speed as his former teammate, Kenjon has rushed 1624 yards for 21 touchdowns. The thing is, no one knows if they are good players, or products of coach Chip Kelly's gun 'n' run system. While Kenjon has the speed plus instinct of his former star teammate LaMichael, Mr. James has yet to snap for the 49ers this season, so the real pro-comparison isn't a good one. However, Kenjon is always smiling in photos and has a bubbly, happy demeanor that always comes across when interviewed. Win or lose, I like this guy and am hoping he does well just cause I like him.Marqis Lee
Marqis Lee of USC may be a long shot to win the award but he is one I am rooting for because he has perhaps the most compelling backstory. The child of two deaf parents who grew up in poverty, Marqis, a CODA (Child of Deaf Adults) and communicates in both spoken dialogue and sign. His father was hardly around and he was shuffled from relative to relative. When I hear a hard knock story like this I think of Mikey Oher from The Blind Side and want the guy to do well no matter what. Despite accomplishment of 112 catches, 1680 yards, and 14 touchdowns USC's losing season will drag down his record. Sure, he is small but so was LaMichael James, Colt McCoy and of course the one who I mentioned several times-the late great Ernie Davis. Marqis might not win, but his backstory is sure to make him a fan favorite, and he has the adversity vote in my opinion.Braxton Miller
Braxton Miller of the Ohio State Buckeyes is one Heisman dark horse that we cannot rule out. Since 2002, he has lead his team in a 12-0 season. One of the best dual threat players in the Big Ten, Miller has completed 58.3 percent of his passes, 2039 yard, and 15 touchdowns. He also has 1271 yards and 15 touchdowns on the ground. Braxton Miller is a reminder former Buckeye QB and Heisman Winner Troy Smith. While not always the best passer, he got the job down. Let's hope Braxton Miller doesn't end up like the man who's stats he shadows, a winner only in football but not in life. Smith threw games and was suspended for gambling during his tenure on Ohio state, and who's pro-career came to an end with injury and a diva attitude. Let's hope the same fate doesn't befall Braxton Miller.Collin Klein
This Kansas State QB and big bodied superstar reminiscent of Tebow is favored to win. The Kansas state senior is a candidate that steal my heart for several reason. One he is cute. Two he plays on the same team as his sophomore running back brother Kyle making football a family affair like the Manning Clan. Three, he plays piano, madolin,and violin killing the dumb jock myth. As a QB he 2036 yards passing, 787 yards rushing, and 34 touchdowns. Mr. Klein holds Kansas State records and has shattered the past records of former Heisman winner Ricky Williams. The things working against Klein are his size. At 6'5" he has more the body of a tight end than a QB and some critics say he does not have the instincts of a next level quarterback. Also after a loss to Baylor some say he is out of running for the award. Either way I believe he is impressive and has a good future ahead of him. With some work instinct can be taught. And we all have a strike or two against us. Maybe Collin Klein can work with his.Manti T'eo
T'eo is nominated and a lot of people have a lot to say about why he shouldn't be. This Latter Day Saint from Hawaii plays only defense for Notre Dame. Many argue that he is in better company and why he is being nominated rather than his more talented teammates? Not to mention he is lacking in the speed department. Say what you will but his on the field instinct is amazing, and it probably tops any player on this list. Not to mention he is having an amazing senior season, playing a large role in Notre Dame's perfect record. In addition T'eo has amazing field vision and knows how to get the ball and what to do with it on every play. He might not have the stats the rest of the men on this lineup but again he knows what to do and when to do it. Sounds a lot like Lawrence Timmons from the Steelers. I want to vote for him just to see him win and anger some people. It's called a Sanjaya complex. I like him just cause.....Who do you think will win?
Love
April
I Came, I Saw, I Sang: Memoirs of a Singing Telegram Delivery Girl
877-Buy-Book
www.buybooksontheweb.com
Amazon.com
Come to my signing
12-27-2012
Bethel Park Library
5100 w. library ave
bethel park, pa
15102
Congrats to Will and Kate
Yes Will and Kate are having a baby!!!!
This is good for two reasons.
One: THEY ARE HAVING A BABY!
Two: IT MEANS THAT THEIR SEX LIFE IS ROCKING THE ROYAL ROOM.
Either way, congrats to the expectant mother and her husband. Get ready nannies, there is a new edition to the Palace.
This is good for two reasons.
One: THEY ARE HAVING A BABY!
Two: IT MEANS THAT THEIR SEX LIFE IS ROCKING THE ROYAL ROOM.
Either way, congrats to the expectant mother and her husband. Get ready nannies, there is a new edition to the Palace.
Remembering Memory
During my morning jog I came across someone who had done one of the many puppet videos I did a number of years ago. She is a performer of semi-note. Despite living in the neighborhood I jog in I had never seen her wandering around. Actually, to come to think of it she hadnt crossed my mind in sometime. Her episode got a lot of play and got me some press. Still it was a few years ago,the 2009-2010 area of my life, not a hot time to be April Brucker.
I stopped her and said hi. I remembered her being a very nice lady and having an extra nice publicist. We had talked a while and she gave me a lead on a possible summer gig. While it never worked out it was still a great opportunity to have. Then she said, "How do I know you?"
Ouch! How could she not remember me? Either this was an intentional diss or she didn't remember me.
I explained she was on my show and made a movement with my hand like puppets. She was like, "What?" I explained and she gave me a look for a second and asked, "What's that?" Then it occurred to me. This was not a diss. She legitimately had not remembered who I was and probably felt awkward and weird about it.
When I told her it was the puppet thing she was like, "Oh yeah!" And then she saw I was wearing a Pitt Sweat Shirt and asked who in the family had gone to Pitt and I said my Mom and Dad. I asked her where she was headed and apparently she was going to physical therapy for an injury she had accidentally gotten. She asked if I was headed to the gym and I said yes. She said, "That's what it's about." Then she patted me on the arm, said it was nice seeing me,and off we went.
The entire walk I was still like, was she dissing me intentionally? The answer was no, it looked like she legitimately didn't remember me. That was over two years ago and a lot has happened in the world since then. Plus she legitimately didn't remember, but I actually want to forget that time in my life. It was pretty flipped out actually.
I remember around the period this was all going on I was leaving a radio program where the host was a low level sadist. Everyone who worked with him talked about what a nightmare he was to be around. My camera man on the project was an alcoholic who would drink in the morning and disappear. I had two partners, one who was a backstabbing opportunist who would steal my ideas at any point and then another who was a control freak with ambition that did not match his lack of talent. Of course then there were the friends. Chacho was calling me at 2 AM and a few months later we had the falling out that ended with him dying before I could apologize. Not to mention I was frequently out of money and even more frequently in trouble with my boss. Oh and I was a part of a documentary where the camera man was addicted to crystal meth, and our other producer, eager to do a good deed, recruited him from a drug rehab that he was an alumni from. Needless to say it was the most interesting work experience ever.
Not to mention a tad bit of an identity crisis that I won't go into here.
Life was different. Life was crazy. This lady legitimately didn't remember. I did remember that time in my life and didnt want to. Maybe we could be on the same page.
The crazy thing about life is that you have these points that are wonderful and points that just suck. If I had an eraser I would wipe out 2001 for sure. Following that would be part of 2004. Eliminate the hell out of 2006. Keep some of 2007,just the good parts. Delete 2009 and the first three fourths of 2010. Keep most of 2011 but eliminate my house being robbed and Joe dying. This year was decent. But take out the latter part of April where I was injured, and all of August when I was dealing with a stalker.
Now things are different in my life for the better. My ebook comes out this week. The puppet videos transitioned into music videos and other TV stuff. I just got a promotion at work, and my finances are coming together. The days of me working with crazy people are over for the most part. Not to mention I have shed about fifteen pounds of baby fat and look smoking (in my mind).
Either way, as I think about it, I know the diss was unintentional on this woman's part. If anything, I have a feeling that I now reconnected with someone that is a potential friend in that neighborhood. Our encounter wasn't ugly, I think it actually turned out to be a rather sweet exchange between two people who worked together for a wrinkle in time before they had the appropriate amount of coffee.
Still, if there was a delete button on life, there would be a lot of stuff to erase. But if we pressed the delete button we wouldn't be able to laugh about the bad music we listened to or the bad hair that we once had. We wouldnt be able to get a kick out of how yes, we had a crush on that person or liked that insanely bad television show. Or how we had that stupid goal that well, was stupid. Or we couldnt laugh about the stupid things we did.
We wouldn't have the human experience. We couldn't and wouldn't be ourselves.
Love
April
I Came, I Saw, I Sang: Memoirs of a Singing Telegram Delivery Girl
877-Buy-Book
www.buybooksontheweb.com
Available on Amazon.
Come to my signing
December 27, 2012 @ 7pm
Bethel Park Library
5100 W. Library Ave
Bethel Park, PA 15102
I stopped her and said hi. I remembered her being a very nice lady and having an extra nice publicist. We had talked a while and she gave me a lead on a possible summer gig. While it never worked out it was still a great opportunity to have. Then she said, "How do I know you?"
Ouch! How could she not remember me? Either this was an intentional diss or she didn't remember me.
I explained she was on my show and made a movement with my hand like puppets. She was like, "What?" I explained and she gave me a look for a second and asked, "What's that?" Then it occurred to me. This was not a diss. She legitimately had not remembered who I was and probably felt awkward and weird about it.
When I told her it was the puppet thing she was like, "Oh yeah!" And then she saw I was wearing a Pitt Sweat Shirt and asked who in the family had gone to Pitt and I said my Mom and Dad. I asked her where she was headed and apparently she was going to physical therapy for an injury she had accidentally gotten. She asked if I was headed to the gym and I said yes. She said, "That's what it's about." Then she patted me on the arm, said it was nice seeing me,and off we went.
The entire walk I was still like, was she dissing me intentionally? The answer was no, it looked like she legitimately didn't remember me. That was over two years ago and a lot has happened in the world since then. Plus she legitimately didn't remember, but I actually want to forget that time in my life. It was pretty flipped out actually.
I remember around the period this was all going on I was leaving a radio program where the host was a low level sadist. Everyone who worked with him talked about what a nightmare he was to be around. My camera man on the project was an alcoholic who would drink in the morning and disappear. I had two partners, one who was a backstabbing opportunist who would steal my ideas at any point and then another who was a control freak with ambition that did not match his lack of talent. Of course then there were the friends. Chacho was calling me at 2 AM and a few months later we had the falling out that ended with him dying before I could apologize. Not to mention I was frequently out of money and even more frequently in trouble with my boss. Oh and I was a part of a documentary where the camera man was addicted to crystal meth, and our other producer, eager to do a good deed, recruited him from a drug rehab that he was an alumni from. Needless to say it was the most interesting work experience ever.
Not to mention a tad bit of an identity crisis that I won't go into here.
Life was different. Life was crazy. This lady legitimately didn't remember. I did remember that time in my life and didnt want to. Maybe we could be on the same page.
The crazy thing about life is that you have these points that are wonderful and points that just suck. If I had an eraser I would wipe out 2001 for sure. Following that would be part of 2004. Eliminate the hell out of 2006. Keep some of 2007,just the good parts. Delete 2009 and the first three fourths of 2010. Keep most of 2011 but eliminate my house being robbed and Joe dying. This year was decent. But take out the latter part of April where I was injured, and all of August when I was dealing with a stalker.
Now things are different in my life for the better. My ebook comes out this week. The puppet videos transitioned into music videos and other TV stuff. I just got a promotion at work, and my finances are coming together. The days of me working with crazy people are over for the most part. Not to mention I have shed about fifteen pounds of baby fat and look smoking (in my mind).
Either way, as I think about it, I know the diss was unintentional on this woman's part. If anything, I have a feeling that I now reconnected with someone that is a potential friend in that neighborhood. Our encounter wasn't ugly, I think it actually turned out to be a rather sweet exchange between two people who worked together for a wrinkle in time before they had the appropriate amount of coffee.
Still, if there was a delete button on life, there would be a lot of stuff to erase. But if we pressed the delete button we wouldn't be able to laugh about the bad music we listened to or the bad hair that we once had. We wouldnt be able to get a kick out of how yes, we had a crush on that person or liked that insanely bad television show. Or how we had that stupid goal that well, was stupid. Or we couldnt laugh about the stupid things we did.
We wouldn't have the human experience. We couldn't and wouldn't be ourselves.
Love
April
I Came, I Saw, I Sang: Memoirs of a Singing Telegram Delivery Girl
877-Buy-Book
www.buybooksontheweb.com
Available on Amazon.
Come to my signing
December 27, 2012 @ 7pm
Bethel Park Library
5100 W. Library Ave
Bethel Park, PA 15102
December 2, 2012
Unicorns in North Korea-My Weekend
There are rumors of unicorns in North Korea. News agencies are taking news of the unicorn lair seriously. I have seen plenty of things in my life. Once I saw what looked to be a pregnant tranny in Port Authority. I thought, "If this tranny is pregnant then there must be unicorns."
Okay,not really. It just helps with the story.
This weekend was a busy one. Friday night I found myself in Rye, NYC delivering a Marilyn Monroe to a rich dude. When I say rich they had a valet. The house was huge, almost like a palace. However, like many of the Westchester rich they negate the backyard. Still,there were woods. I had to wonder, do unicorns live in the woods? Is this the magical forest I have been told all my life about. I went inside and did my Marilyn Monroe for a man who was quite a character, but in a good way. He was into it. I wondered if on a night like this I would meet a unicorn?
When I left I looked back. I opened and closed my eyes hoping to see an enchanted forest.
However, there was no such luck. I went back to the train and went home. I hate having to start my day that late at night anyway. It makes me feel groggy. I got to the train platform hoping to finally see my unicorn. Westchester has woods so I had a better bet. Instead, I was greeted by three drunken Polish nannies who had a bottle of Yellow Tail that they were drinking all by themselves. They finished off some beer and vodka and because of my curly hair nicknamed me DSW.
When we got on the train they nicknamed our car the 'Psycho Car" and told the folks who couldnt handle them to "get off." One had an ipod that played bizarre Eastern European pop music. However, the backing tune didn't matter. They would burst out singing, "Sorry Miss Jackson! I am for real!!!!!!" Then the conductor, a sexy chocolate colored delicious looking gentlemen passed through and they gave him a whistle. I bet you he has never gotten that reception ever. When Katrina, Anya, and Anya found out I had a blog they wanted to be a part of it. Same as the mohawked sexy soccer player Victor. While they produced no unicorn they were a colorful diversion.
At one point Katrina climbed up on the top part of the train where one keeps their luggage. Some say it was because she was trashed and was blacked out, risking harm by male predator. I say it was because like me she was looking for a unicorn.
Nonetheless,I would never find out. The following day was a day where I ran around like McCray Cray. It began where I was Wonder Woman for a woman's fiftieth birthday. The question is, did Wonder Woman ever ride a unicorn?
I would never get the answer because a few minutes later my boss's assistant called me and told me I had to deliver an I Love You/I'm Sorry heart downtown to some woman from a mysterious sender. While a singing and dancing heart is nice, I bet you the girl would have felt better had her lover sprung for a unicorn. I know, their existence is up for question. But rest assured I was on the hunt incognito in my heart costume.
Needless to say no unicorns were found despite my disguise. I was then put on phone duty, which means yes, I got a promotion at work. Yes it means more money. It also means more responsibility. It also means running home and hoping the phone rings so I get to make money but also not enough to drive me crazy. Nevermind ring a lot but dont drive me crazy. Just ring so I make lots of money. Either way, while phone duty and booking work is good it means less time to go unicorn hunting.
I know, this work and bills distracts me from my real goal. My boss wouldn't understand. Then again, many employers would not.
My last stop of the night was doing a Marilyn Monroe in the Upper-Bronx, Lower Westchest area. The family was nice and they gave me a fifty dollar tip. One young woman recognized me from Glenn Miller's Shows. No I am not talking the big band man. I am talking Satan's Comic, frequent opener to Otto and George. Maybe he would have a lead on a unicorn. Either way, it was McAwesome when she asked, "Where's May?"
I thought about it. Satan's Comic would not have a unicorn lead but rather a dirty unicorn joke. It would be the laugh I needed but not the lead.
I thought about it. Maybe I should bring May Wilson on the unicorn hunt. She might have some leads.
The North Korean Disney Dictator would never suspect her of being a spy.They would unsuspectingly lead us to the unicorn lair and we would ride off into the sunset. However, my dreams began to die and fade as I felt myself get tired.
I ended up getting a five dollar psychic reading from a very nice woman who told me I was unlucky in love and had to let go of my past. She offered me a crystal cleaning. She said it would help me feel better. That psychic that got decked said the same thing to Lindsay Lohan. I dont think LiLo needed the cleansing to heal her. I think like all little girls she needs a unicorn.Then again, she does enough substances where she probably thinks she has seen a unicorn a few times so maybe that is close enough.
Instead I went home, texted my boss a few times about possible phone duty today, and went to sleep. The whole night I only dreamed of one thing, the one thing my daddy never got me. Yes,my father gave me food, clothing, and shelter. Yes, my father paid for my skating and gymnastics lessons. Yes,my father paid for the first puppet I got (and other family members still curse him). Yes, my father got me a hermit crab. Yes, he even paid for my college education. But damnit Daddy, all I ever wanted was a unicorn!!!!!!!
Maybe my next boyfriend can steal me one.
Love
April
I Came, I Saw, I Sang: Memoirs of a Singing Telegram Delivery Girl
877-Buy-Book
www.buybooksontheweb.com
Available on Amazon
Come to my book signing
December 27,2012
Bethel Park Library
5100 West Library Ave
Bethel Park, PA
Okay,not really. It just helps with the story.
This weekend was a busy one. Friday night I found myself in Rye, NYC delivering a Marilyn Monroe to a rich dude. When I say rich they had a valet. The house was huge, almost like a palace. However, like many of the Westchester rich they negate the backyard. Still,there were woods. I had to wonder, do unicorns live in the woods? Is this the magical forest I have been told all my life about. I went inside and did my Marilyn Monroe for a man who was quite a character, but in a good way. He was into it. I wondered if on a night like this I would meet a unicorn?
When I left I looked back. I opened and closed my eyes hoping to see an enchanted forest.
However, there was no such luck. I went back to the train and went home. I hate having to start my day that late at night anyway. It makes me feel groggy. I got to the train platform hoping to finally see my unicorn. Westchester has woods so I had a better bet. Instead, I was greeted by three drunken Polish nannies who had a bottle of Yellow Tail that they were drinking all by themselves. They finished off some beer and vodka and because of my curly hair nicknamed me DSW.
When we got on the train they nicknamed our car the 'Psycho Car" and told the folks who couldnt handle them to "get off." One had an ipod that played bizarre Eastern European pop music. However, the backing tune didn't matter. They would burst out singing, "Sorry Miss Jackson! I am for real!!!!!!" Then the conductor, a sexy chocolate colored delicious looking gentlemen passed through and they gave him a whistle. I bet you he has never gotten that reception ever. When Katrina, Anya, and Anya found out I had a blog they wanted to be a part of it. Same as the mohawked sexy soccer player Victor. While they produced no unicorn they were a colorful diversion.
At one point Katrina climbed up on the top part of the train where one keeps their luggage. Some say it was because she was trashed and was blacked out, risking harm by male predator. I say it was because like me she was looking for a unicorn.
Nonetheless,I would never find out. The following day was a day where I ran around like McCray Cray. It began where I was Wonder Woman for a woman's fiftieth birthday. The question is, did Wonder Woman ever ride a unicorn?
I would never get the answer because a few minutes later my boss's assistant called me and told me I had to deliver an I Love You/I'm Sorry heart downtown to some woman from a mysterious sender. While a singing and dancing heart is nice, I bet you the girl would have felt better had her lover sprung for a unicorn. I know, their existence is up for question. But rest assured I was on the hunt incognito in my heart costume.
Needless to say no unicorns were found despite my disguise. I was then put on phone duty, which means yes, I got a promotion at work. Yes it means more money. It also means more responsibility. It also means running home and hoping the phone rings so I get to make money but also not enough to drive me crazy. Nevermind ring a lot but dont drive me crazy. Just ring so I make lots of money. Either way, while phone duty and booking work is good it means less time to go unicorn hunting.
I know, this work and bills distracts me from my real goal. My boss wouldn't understand. Then again, many employers would not.
My last stop of the night was doing a Marilyn Monroe in the Upper-Bronx, Lower Westchest area. The family was nice and they gave me a fifty dollar tip. One young woman recognized me from Glenn Miller's Shows. No I am not talking the big band man. I am talking Satan's Comic, frequent opener to Otto and George. Maybe he would have a lead on a unicorn. Either way, it was McAwesome when she asked, "Where's May?"
I thought about it. Satan's Comic would not have a unicorn lead but rather a dirty unicorn joke. It would be the laugh I needed but not the lead.
I thought about it. Maybe I should bring May Wilson on the unicorn hunt. She might have some leads.
The North Korean Disney Dictator would never suspect her of being a spy.They would unsuspectingly lead us to the unicorn lair and we would ride off into the sunset. However, my dreams began to die and fade as I felt myself get tired.I ended up getting a five dollar psychic reading from a very nice woman who told me I was unlucky in love and had to let go of my past. She offered me a crystal cleaning. She said it would help me feel better. That psychic that got decked said the same thing to Lindsay Lohan. I dont think LiLo needed the cleansing to heal her. I think like all little girls she needs a unicorn.Then again, she does enough substances where she probably thinks she has seen a unicorn a few times so maybe that is close enough.
Instead I went home, texted my boss a few times about possible phone duty today, and went to sleep. The whole night I only dreamed of one thing, the one thing my daddy never got me. Yes,my father gave me food, clothing, and shelter. Yes, my father paid for my skating and gymnastics lessons. Yes,my father paid for the first puppet I got (and other family members still curse him). Yes, my father got me a hermit crab. Yes, he even paid for my college education. But damnit Daddy, all I ever wanted was a unicorn!!!!!!!
Maybe my next boyfriend can steal me one.
LoveApril
I Came, I Saw, I Sang: Memoirs of a Singing Telegram Delivery Girl
877-Buy-Book
www.buybooksontheweb.com
Available on Amazon
Come to my book signing
December 27,2012
Bethel Park Library
5100 West Library Ave
Bethel Park, PA
December 1, 2012
World AIDS Day
Today is December 1st World AIDS Day.
This means it is time to get smart.
Safe sex is not just having sex with a condom or dental dam but having sex with someone that you feel safe with.
If you have the misfortune of suffering from addiction, a disease and not a character defect, please remember not to share needles.
If you meet someone who is positive, treat them with dignity and respect. There are no guilty or innocent victims of HIV. Taking away the stigma against those who suffer brings us one step closer to making this a piece of history.
Get smart. Get informed. Don't let the government cut funding for AIDS patients.
They deserve love and care too
I Came, I Saw, I Sang: Memoirs of a Singing Telegram Delivery Girl877-buy-bookwww.buybooksontheweb.comAvailable on Amazon
Come to my book signingDecember 27 20127pmBethel Park Library5100 W. Library AVeBethel Park, PA
This means it is time to get smart.
Safe sex is not just having sex with a condom or dental dam but having sex with someone that you feel safe with.
If you have the misfortune of suffering from addiction, a disease and not a character defect, please remember not to share needles.
If you meet someone who is positive, treat them with dignity and respect. There are no guilty or innocent victims of HIV. Taking away the stigma against those who suffer brings us one step closer to making this a piece of history.
Get smart. Get informed. Don't let the government cut funding for AIDS patients.
They deserve love and care too
I Came, I Saw, I Sang: Memoirs of a Singing Telegram Delivery Girl877-buy-bookwww.buybooksontheweb.comAvailable on Amazon
Come to my book signingDecember 27 20127pmBethel Park Library5100 W. Library AVeBethel Park, PA
