Michael A. Arnzen's Blog: News from Gorelets.com, page 12

Kindle Countdown: PLAY DEAD – this week only!

Play Dead on the Kindle

KINDLE COUNTDOWN | Feb 10th-15th | PLAY DEAD



One Week Discount on Play Dead for Amazon Kindle



Act fast and get the PLAY DEAD ebook cheap from Feb 10th-15th

PLAY DEAD publisher Raw Dog Screaming Press is running a “Kindle Countdown” special offer next week! Kicking off on Monday, February 10th, you can get the Amazon Kindle version of my second novel for just .99 cents. It will go up a dollar a day afterward, until returning to its regular price on the 15th. So don’t hesitate! Not only will you get a great deal if you act quick, your purchase will help make the book more visible on amazon.com for little awhile. So share the word and let your depraved friends know all about it, before the clock ticks down.

You can find kindle versions for many of my books through my Amazon Profile.

Praise for Play Dead ….

“Unreservedly, utterly nasty…and man, does Mike Arnzen make it a work of art — we have got meticulously handcrafted ghastliness here. And no mistake. Arnzen is in the company of writers like Poppy Z, Brite, Clive Barker, and Stephen King, to name just three. Well done….Play Dead commands an extraordinary palette of horror.” — NY Review of SF

“Las Vegas is as diseased a city as there is, and Mike Arnzen knows this as well as anyone. In Play Dead, he distills its essence down to a uniquely brutal game and brings together as fascinatingly repellent a bunch of losers ever to make a grab for the corroded brass ring. What happens in Vegas stays in Vegas? Jesus, let’s hope so.” — Brian Hodge, author of Deathgrip and Wild Horses

“A masterpiece of eloquent depravity.” — JA Konrath, author of Bloody Mary

The original hard-to-find hardcover edition is long sold out but the novel is also available in paperback.

“Limber” – A Lost Audiovile Track – Discovered and Remixed

In 2014, I am planning to return to recording and to produce my first audiobook for Mastication Publications. So in early December, I started getting set up… and I stumbled upon an old recording of my short story, “Limber” hidden in the old master tapes for my 2007 CD from Raw Dog Screaming Press, Audiovile. I’d completely forgotten I’d even recorded it! As I listened, the only reason I could guess that I abandoned it was that it didn’t quite “fit” into Audiovile…but now I like the “Pink Floyd” styled guitar that backed the vocals, and the storytelling still stands up nicely. So over the holidays I added some percussion to the track, remixed and remastered the recording, and decided to post it online for the New Year.

“Limber” is one of one hundred stories from my collection, 100 Jolts: Shockingly Short Stories (Raw Dog Screaming Press, 2007) — a popular collection of flash horror fiction which still remains in print. You can also still order Audiovile from Raw Dog Screaming Press, CD Baby, or even download it on sites like iTunes. Consider Limber your online “bonus track.” It sounds pretty cool on headphones, so download and enjoy!

“Limber” Download (5.35mb .mp3). Or listen on soundcloud.

Author information Michael Arnzen Michael Arnzen is an award-winning author of horror fiction and an English professor at Seton Hill University, where he has taught writing since 1999. His trophy case includes four Bram Stoker Awards and an International Horror Guild Award for his often funny, always disturbing stories. Join his social network at michaelarnzen.com.TwitterFacebookGoogle+

The Resolution

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

Above you have The Resolution — selected as the “Best Storyline” in the writing contest featured in the latest issue of The Goreletter. Kudos to my “co-authors”: Gary Blankenship, Mike Brendan, AK Drees, Brian J. Harrold, Dale Herring & Terrie Leigh Relf, along with Matt Duvall and Steph Ellis, all of whom made this a lot of fun.

This story started with the opening sentence, offered online as an Instigation “prompt” for a New Year’s Eve writing contest … and authors “replied” to it using tweets and AuthorBee functions to build a narrative that went in many different directions. Arnzen selected the “best storyline” from the contributed tweets using AuthorBee’s “remix” functionality, and both Michael Arnzen and AuthorBee awarded selected participants with prizes.

Here are the winners:

“Best Individual Contributions” prizes go to:

Mike Brendan, Terrie Leigh Relf and Gary Blankenship.

They are each winning a $20 Amazon Gift Certificate, kindly sponsored by AuthorBee. I have chosen Gary Blankenship to also win a free signed copy of my book, Play Dead, for top post, because he not only took the story down a very weird direction but also because he invented the phrase “blood caramel.”

“Best Storyline”: Writers who contributed to the “best storyline” above receive a free copy of Instigation: Creative Prompts on the Dark Side and were entered along with all participants into a random draw for one of three signed Fridge of the Damned magnetic horror poetry kits. The winners of these are… Dale Herring, Gary Blankenship and Steph Ellis.

Thanks to everyone for playing along, and to AuthorBee for sponsoring this fun contest!

For more inspiration, see Instigation: Creative Prompts on the Dark Side, or visit the Instigation Playground on AuthorBee.

Follow @AuthorBee on twitter, and you can still play with the story or start your own!

Author information Michael Arnzen Michael Arnzen is an award-winning author of horror fiction and an English professor at Seton Hill University, where he has taught writing since 1999. His trophy case includes four Bram Stoker Awards and an International Horror Guild Award for his often funny, always disturbing stories. Join his social network at michaelarnzen.com.TwitterFacebookGoogle+

Top Ten Ways to Make Santa’s Naughty List

10. Playing “CSI: Dreamhouse” with your (or your sister’s) Barbie dolls.
9. Telling Mommy she’s “pretty” to her face and then adding the words “poor at parenting” as you walk out of the room.
8. Presuming that when you’re “grounded” you’re free to play with electrical outlets to your heart’s content.
7. Texting while driving your Big Wheel on the freeway.
6. Skipping biology class so you can experiment directly on animals at the pet store without supervision.
5. Actually punching Hawaiians to get your hands on their branded juice box.
4. Festooning your bedroom with ropes of snot rather than blowing your nose on the hankie you got last year for Christmas.
3. Writing your book report in thick black marker covering every page of the book you were supposed to “report on” with the words “HATE, HATE, HATE IT!”
2. Going commando when shopping for scout uniforms.
1. Sacrificing a goat instead of blowing out birthday candles.

Asphixiation

Try saying “asphyxiation” five times fast. You will know what it means from experience. But if you survive, read on…

You probably know the term refers to “choking to death” and that it is the fancy pants medical name for strangulation. But did you know the term derives from the Greek, meaning a- (“without”) + sphyxis (a “heartbeat”)?

If you thought it had something to do with the Egyptian term “sphinx” (which I think means “without + a nose), then you were wrong. (To “asphynxiate” actually means to turn into a giant cat with wings and tell riddles till your enormous human face erodes away.)

There are many circumstances that can induce asphyxia, all of which are characterized by the inability to acquire sufficient oxygen through breathing for a long, long — gasp! — LONG period of time. These circumstances can include but are not limited to: the constriction or obstruction of airways, such as from asthma, laryngospasm, or eating an excessive amount of cotton candy; from being in environments where oxygen is not readily accessible, such as underwater, in outer space, or when your head is dunked into — and held down — in a vat of boiling acid; environments where sufficiently oxygenated air is present, but cannot be adequately breathed because of air contamination, such as inhaling excessive smoke in a burning building, being trapped in an evil villain’s stinkbug chamber, or passing out in the men’s room in a truck stop on I-15. Asphyxia can cause coma or death or auto-erotic pleasure followed by death followed by embarrassment to your family who wishes they could choke you all over again.

To asphyxiate will fix nothing, especially not your ass.

THE RESOLUTION: A Twitter Story Contest – Sponsored by AuthorBee!

ANNOUNCING A NEW YEAR’S WRITING CONTEST
in the Instigation Playground at AuthorBee

Deadline for entries is 12/29/13 at Midnight est.

WIN AN AMAZON GIFT CERTIFICATE FROM OUR HOST, @AUTHORBEE!

Let’s write a twisted tale together to ring (or is that “wring”?) in the New Year! The story is called “The Resolution.” And it all begins with the following line:

You’re bound. A TV shows Times Square. “What’s your resolution,” a man holding a knife asks, “for the afterlife?”

Consider yourself “instigated”: YOU GO NEXT! You simply need to be a member of twitter to play along (it’s free — check it out). Just log in via Twitter and load up http://tweet.authorbee.com/stories/689 (or return to the Instigation Playground channel at any time) to continue the storyline. But while you’re there, click around on the arrows and mute/solo buttons. If you read other people’s posts and get to a point where you want to change directions, you can do that, too, anywhere along the way.

EVERY POST TO “THE RESOLUTION” STORY IS AUTOMATICALLY ENTERED INTO THE CONTEST and has a chance to win — no matter how erudite, no matter how nutso. So don’t be afraid to join in the fray. In fact, I encourage you to not only fray away, but instigate your friends to come join us too. The story may get crazy, but the beauty of the AuthorBee web app is that it allows you to reassemble the story however you want to, remixing every plot thread until you’ve got a good narrative result. Then you can “share the storyline” on twitter as a way of publishing it. That’s a good way to get your friends to participate in the telling of the tale. But I will also choose and publish the “best storyline” (in my humble opinion) on January 29th and you earn a chance to win a prize of books, poetry magnets, discount codes, and even amazon gift certificates if you are a part of it!

The genius of the AuthorBee site is that it allows you to make sense out of the chaos inherent to twitter. Use this contest as an opportunity to play around all over the site, like joining in the other stories already started in the Instigation Playground. But “The Resolution” is where you can win a prize. The good folks at AuthorBee believe in our creative hivemind so much they are sponsoring our exclusive contest with an awesome amazon gift card prize…and the more people who join us in writing the story, the better the odds are that you’ll win!

BASIC RULES:

For this story — and this contest — to really work, you simply need to follow the following rules.

Contribute to the story titled “The Resolution” on AuthorBee between 8:00 pm (EST) December 20, 2013 and midnight (EST) December 29, 2013.One contribution is required, although we encourage you to contribute more than once.You must be a Twitter follower of @MikeArnzen AND @AuthorBee. Follow, then contribute — or contribute, then follow. We don’t care which order, just follow us both so you’ll be updated as the story unfolds.

WINNERS & PRIZES:

I will choose the contest winners in two (2) categories:

1. Best individual contributions. Each contribution that you make will be judged separately. If less than 20 people contribute, I will give one free, signed book to my single favorite contributor. But authorbee.com knows we can do better than that!  So if 20-49 people contribute, they have generously offered me FIVE $20 AMAZON GIFT CARDS to give as prizes. If 50 or more contribute, TEN gift cards will be awarded!  (What this means, essentially, is that that the more contributors we can bring into the story, the better your chances are at winning something).

2. Best storyline. I will select the best storyline for publication on Gorelets.com and offer featured publicity to everyone who is a part of it, by sharing the story far and wide. Contributors to the “best storyline” will also receive A DISCOUNT CODE on Instigation: Creative Prompts on the Dark Side and be entered into a random draw for one of THREE SIGNED REFRIGERATOR OF THE DAMNED POETRY MAGNET KITS!

The final storyline and contributing winners will be announced on December 31, 2013 on Gorelets.com and via Twitter.

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

Note: Any tweet you post remains your literary property and are only subject to the terms of service of twitter and/or authorbee — but as a collaborative story line, the final results of this contest should be considered public and the award-winning storyline will fall under the Attribution-ShareAlike (CC BY-SA) license. This will allow contributors to share our wild and wacky story freely with others.  http://creativecommons.org/licenses/

Twisted Prompts for Sicko Writers (32)

+ Santa goes down the chimney…and enters hell! Script a dialogue between Santa and Satan.
(xref: Instigation Playground)

+ Describe an incident with the border patrol at the edge of an otherworldly portal.
(xref: Instigation Showcase)

+ Dramatize your own funeral (and/or wake) from the viewpoint of the person in attendance most likely to be bored by it all.
(xref: Instigation ebook)

ATTENTION: The Former Goreletter Server/Archive has Moved

On Halloween, I began using a new mail server to design and deliver The Goreletter, which includes fancy HTML graphics and more options.

I have also now removed previous newsletter server pages for The Goreletter — which means that more than a decade’s worth of former archives are also no longer accessible and any links here and abroad that referenced a “cgi” directory are no longer valid and will probably take visitors automatically to an error page or a dead end.

I am presently rebuilding the former archives (and eliminating all old dead URLs from them) in a fancy, new “responsive” webpage which I will be unveiling over the Thanksgiving holiday, if not sooner.

If you want to review back issues, subscribe, or change your delivery options for The Goreletter, simply visit the newsletter’s about page.

If you think you’ve subscribed, but haven’t received an issue for over a year, you may have changed email accounts in the mean time. The latest issue was published on November 17th, 2013 — read it here. And if this doesn’t look familiar to you, then check your subscription or resubscribe to the Goreletter here.

Thanks for your patience as I work to shuffle the backend of this website around. If you hit any dead links or run into trouble, just email me.

Special NaNoWriMo Offer on Instigation

ALERT, HORROR WRITERS! For the rest of November, you can get my creative writing helper, Instigation: Creative Prompts on the Dark Side at a 50% discount (just $1.99) if you order directly from Mastication Publications.

Available only on the Mastication Publications weblog.

The New Goreletter (Vol. 8) – Delivered on Halloween

Around midnight on Halloween, I unleashed the latest issue of The Goreletter — an all new format hosted by an all new service for better security, greater options, and a renewed mission.

If you did not receive one, either your address was stale or you were lost in the shuffle. Here’s what you missed — http://eepurl.com/H17F1 — please resubscribe or check to ensure your spam filter isn’t blocking mailings from me.

In the mean time, I will be moving the archives of back issues and chasing down old, dead links to them. Thank you to all who follow my writing and subscribe to this newsletter. It’s been delivered for free for many years now, but issues were coming too irregularly for my taste each year. I think I’ve streamlined things now so I can send out new material more often, but of shorter length, and in a way that better integrates with my workflow and social networking. Happy to hear your feedback on the new format, etc., in a comment below or private email. — Mike Arnzen

p.s. If you’re a writer engaging in NaNoWriMo this year, be sure to check out Instigation: Creative Prompts on the Dark Side. It contains material specifically for novelists working on binge projects like this.