Sundi Jo Graham's Blog, page 49

“I can look at someone and absolutely detest their arrog...

“I can look at someone and absolutely detest their arrogance. But little do I realize, until God shows me in an embarrassing fashion, that I too am being arrogant.”

Taken from Dear Dad, Did You Know I Was a Princess?

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Stepping off the Roller Coaster

From Sundi Jo: This is a guest post by Tammy Helfrich. She is a wife, mom, daughter and friend, who offers encouragement about marriage, life, and more on her blog. She’s commitedd to helping others realize their voice matters, and to embrace their story. Find her on Facebook and Twitter. @tammyhelfrich

Last June, I made a decision. I decided to step off the roller coaster. I had had enough. No more ups and downs. No more mountains and valleys. It was making me sick. I felt awful.

photo credit: hounddiggity (creative commons)

My roller coaster was the cycle of dieting I had been on for years since having my kids. Heck, I’d been riding it for most of my adult life. However, before kids, I was traditionally much more active and worked out somewhat consistently. But, since those little blessings came along, I had found every excuse in the book to not make time to workout.

I would try the latest diet. I had gained a lot of weight during my pregnancies. Much more than recommended. I’m sorry to say that I used it as an excuse to be unhealthy and eat poorly.

Over the years, I have tried every diet imaginable. Atkins, Weight Watchers, the cabbage soup diet, the grapefruit diet, diet pills, and every other miracle diet out there. And it would work for a short time, but then I would gain the weight back, plus about ten pounds more.

However, last year, that changed. I was six months away from turning 40. Yikes! How was this possible?

At that point, I decided to change my life. I decided to get healthy. No diets, no miracle drugs, no short cuts. I decided to dive in and learn how to be healthier every day. How to make better decisions to live a healthier lifestyle.

I read Made to Crave, which really helped. And I started eating healthier. I cut back on desserts, ate lean meats, fruits, veggies, and started slowly working out. I love to walk, so I started there. After a few weeks, I decided to try a kettlebell studio. I had not worked out like that since I was an athlete back in my high school and college days. I loved it!

Over the next six months, I continued to make changes. Slow, steady changes. It wasn’t glamorous. It wasn’t rapid weight loss. It was me becoming healthier. Consistently. One step at a time.

On my 40th birthday in January, I felt great. I was smaller, healthier, and stronger. I had pushed myself to be different. To stop coasting through life not thinking about how my unhealthy decisions were impacting my long-term health and well-being.

Has it been easy? No.

Have I had challenges? Yes.

Am I as far along as I’d hoped to be? No.

Am I giving up? No way!

The benefits of eating healthy and working out have been so incredible. I’ve helped to inspire others to take small steps. Our family is more active again. My boys see their parents as active and healthy, and not just sitting around doing nothing.

I have confidence that I can continue to evolve on this journey, and I am excited about my continued transformation. And I am convinced that you can do it too. It starts with one small step.

What roller coaster do you need to step off of? Leave a comment below…

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Wrecked [Book Review]

I love to read. I love to grow. I love it when a book comes along that allows me to do both. There’s nothing better than a book with a call to action to get off your butt and start doing something.

That’s exactly what Wrecked: When a Broken World Slams into your Comfortable Life has done for me.

I’ve been too comfortable lately. The day in and day out routine of life has caught up with me and I don’t like that feeling. Don’t get me wrong, I enjoy the feeling of being comfortable.

When I get too comfortable in my circumstances though, I know it’s time for more growth.

What does it mean to be wrecked? Author Jeff Goins puts it this way.

“To be wrecked is to be disabused of the status quo.

The book calls for us to be compassionate. Can we be compassionate if we haven’t suffered ourselves? Are we willing to suffer so that we can be compassionate?

“We live in a world of pain, but few of us have actually engaged it. We are only passing through the pain, without allowing it to leave its mark on us.

I couldn’t have said it better myself.

So, what exactly is the book about?

Wrecked is about the life we are afraid to live. It’s about radical sacrifice and selfless service–how we find purpose in the midst of pain. It’s a look at how we discover fulfillment in the least likely of places. It’s about living like we mean it. It’s a guide to growing up and giving your life away, helping you live in the tension between the next adventure and the daily mundane.

Let me tell you what this book is not. It’s not a quick read through that will entertain you. It’s not a book that gives you an excuse not to follow your calling. It’s not a book that will sugar coat pain.

It’s a book that will wreck your current world and give you a new call to action.

I’ve been honored to be part of a team that was the first to receive this book. I’ve had the privilege of watching Jeff work diligently to bring this message to you and I’m confident you will enjoy it as much as I did. If you don’t, check your pulse and try again.

I’m encouraging you today to buy the actual book, not just the Kindle version. There are perks for you, of course. When you buy the book and email your receipt to Jeff, you’ll six FREE gifts totaling over $158. Oh, and it’s cool stuff you’re gonna want too. Check out the details here.

This is a great read for anyone. It will change your perspective. It will open your eyes. It’s time to get uncomfortable.

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How Jif Peanut Butter Taught Me About Change

I’m not a big fan of change. I like to be in control. Unless things change because I change them, it takes me out of my comfort zone. I get it honestly. My mom struggles with the same thing. We like things a certain way and when life gets shuffled around, we can get a little cranky.

photo credit: brianc (creative commons)

Mom loves peanut butter, but not just any type of peanut butter. It has to be Jif Creamy Peanut Butter. Since I was a little girl I don’t remember any other type being in our pantry. You know the Visa slogan, “Don’t leave home without it.” That applies to my mom and her Jif peanut butter. If she’s going on a trip, it’s on her must-have list. Afterall, choosy mom’s choose Jif, right?

I used to be the same way. Jif was the only way because it’s pretty much all I knew. During my year-long discipleship program at the Table Rock Freedom Center, that changed. If I wanted to eat peanut butter I was going to use whatever they had and that was that. It didn’t take me long to adjust and the types varied. Sometimes it was Peter Pan. Other times it was an off brand. I quickly realized I didn’t care what type of peanut butter I was putting in my oatmeal, as long as there was peanut butter. Don’t snarl your nose at the oatmeal and peanut butter thing until you’ve tried it. Delicious!

Recently, I was making celery and peanut butter for an event. I purchased the off brand because it was cheaper. I bought more than I needed, so I put the half-full jar back in the pantry, right next to the Jif. Last week I decided I wanted some oatmeal and peanut butter, so as the oatmeal cooked in the microwave, I reached for the staple item. When I opened the jar I noticed there was quite a bit missing. I looked over at my mom sitting on the couch, back at the peanut butter, and back at her. There was no way this woman had touched that peanut butter. It was impossible.

I scanned the pantry looking for the Jif. There wasn’t any. I finally had to ask. I held up the off brand jar and asked, “Have you been eating the peanut butter?” “Yes,” she said. “I thought I would try it and decided not to buy any Jif.”

Once I picked my tongue up off the floor, I couldn’t help but smile. In the 28 years I’ve known my mother, there has never been another type of peanut butter in the picture. To you this may be a simple story, but to me it’s huge. It means growth. She put her fear of change aside and did something different.

Growth doesn’t always happen in the big things; it starts in the small things.

Being afraid of change is detrimental to our growth. We can’t grow in our faith without change. We can’t grow in our relationship without it. We can’t grow in our jobs without it. We have to be willing to let go of our need to be in control and allow change to happen. We won’t always like it. Sometimes it will hurt. But it’s necessary.

What small step do you need to take today to let go of your need to be in control and avoid change? Leave a comment below…

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Wrecked Words

I’m pathetic. I’m a loser. I’m completely unlovable. No one will ever love me. I’m ugly. I’m stupid.

I heard these words most of my life. Who said them? Me. I believed they were true and my actions showed just how much I believed them. When others would say kind things to me, I’d roll my eyes, pop off some kind of snarky comment, and walk away. Who were they to lie to me? I could handle that myself.

Today I’m honored to be guest posting for Donya Dunlap. Check out the rest of the post here…

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A Call to be Proactive

I have a friend who has a dream. It’s a big dream. A great dream. It excites me for her and the lives that could be touched by it. She believes God has blessed her with the vision of making that dream happen.

photo credit: robert gourley

But there’s one problem.

She’s only dreaming it. What I mean by that is she’s not taking steps to make it happen. It’s a dream that’s been a dream for years. My concern is it will never move past that.

I understand God doesn’t make things happen overnight. There’s a time for everything. He puts dreams in our hearts long before they come true. But with that said, there’s something he requires of us.

God requires action when pursuing the dreams He has given us. 

I hear a lot of “When God makes this happen and when God does this,” but I don’t see action taking place to set that dream in motion.

God doesn’t call us to be passive. We have to get up and move. We have to do. As Mark Batterson says in The Circle Maker, we need to “work like it’s up to us and pray like it’s up to God.”

Sometimes I think we use God as a crutch. It’s easy to talk about the things we want him to do, but not so easy to take the responsibility he has given us to go and make those things happen. We tend to want to sit on the sidelines and wait for the blessings to just fall in our laps. Sometimes it happens that way; most of the time it doesn’t.

I knew I wanted to be a writer when my sixth grade teacher forced me to do a poetry book I absolutely wanted nothing to do with. Once I got started, I couldn’t stop. It lit a fire in me and highlighted my ability to inspire others with words. That’s a talent God has given me. Writing is a dream he has put in my heart.

I always wanted to write a book. Someday I would. I wanted to have articles published. I wanted people to read my words. But I didn’t want to do the work. Someday came and went along with excuses why things weren’t happening. I waited for someone to knock on my door, tell me how awesome I was, give me an advance on my book, and the rest would be history. If only life worked that way.

I’ve had to be proactive. God placed the dream on my heart and now he’s saying “It’s time to do your part.” That includes submitting book proposals, looking for an agent, guest posting for others, building a tribe, making daily connections via social media, sharing my story with as many people as possible, and actually writing the book. Sometimes it involves being wide awake at 3:55 on a Saturday morning writing this post.

My first book is in the publication process, but the hard work hasn’t even started. I can sit back and wait for God to put it in the hands of readers, or I can actively step up and do my part. He rewards those who are diligent.

I don’t write this to condemn my friend. I believe her dream is very active. It’s going to take a God-sized miracle to make it happen, and I’m confident He can do it with or without her. With that said, I’m afraid if she waits too long God will pass the baton onto someone else.

What are you doing to be proactive with a dream God has given you? Leave a comment below…

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Seeking a Father’s Love

I remember serving his first drink at six years old. Seagram’s 7 and water was his trademark. I got the glass from the cupboard, lifted the ½ gallon whiskey bottle onto the counter and slowly poured it into the cup. Then I topped it off with some water, just like he liked it.

You see, if I made his drinks for him, he would love me. My own thinking. Maybe I wouldn’t have to compete with the alcohol. Maybe he could have us both. That wasn’t the case.

Today I’m guest posting over at Stories From the Vine. Click here to read the rest of the post. 

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Doing it Afraid

Last night something adventurous happened. Something exciting. Scary as you know what. I may share the what later, but for right now I’m going to just let myself enjoy it.

photo credit: elycefeliz (creative commons)

Last night I took a huge step of faith. I was scared to death, but I did it afraid. 

Why?

Because doing it afraid is what Jesus tells us to do.

I’m continuously learning that if I just take the step, God will help me take the next one. Then the next one, and the next one….

Today, what do you need to do afraid? Leave your comment below…

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Getting Wrecked -Time for the Uncomfortable

My life is turning upside down. It’s getting wrecked. The more I think about it, the more excited I get really.

When’s the last time you got wrecked? 

I’ve been blessed with the opportunity to read Jeff Goins‘ first book, Wrecked: When a Broken World Slams into Your Comfortable Life. I’m only on chapter three and I find myself needing to slow down so I can absorb it all.

Though the book hasn’t been released yet, you can grab the first chapter FREE here. Seriously. Go. Read.

Wrecked is about the life we are afraid to live. It’s about radical sacrifice and selfless service—how we find purpose in the midst of pain—and a look at how we discover fulfillment in the least likely of places.

Here’s what I can tell you so far. Be prepared to be challenged. If you’re walking around wondering what your purpose is or how you’re supposed to find it, then you’re gonna want to read this book. Goins has shown me a whole new meaning to the word compassion and I want you to learn about it too.

He sums up the book this way, and it fits perfectly:

This book is for us—a generation intent on pursuing our life’s work in a way that leaves us without regrets.”

When I’m finished reading I have a feeling I’m going to be challenged to DO something bigger than has nothing to do with my own satisfaction and pleasures.

You can buy the book now, but you should wait. Jeff wants to send you over $150 worth of free stuff for your wait. Learn more about it here. You’re gonna love this book!

 

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Getting Wrecked -Time for the Uncomfortable is a post from: Sundi Jo

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Fruit Cups and Heart to Hearts

I was having a heart to heart with a good friend the other day over a fruit cup at Panera. They should add more pineapple chunks to the mix. Anywho, I was speaking some truth to her – some of it hard to swallow.

photo credit: steve snodgrass (creative commons)

In one point of our conversation I told her going through these things sucks. It’s gonna hurt. I couldn’t candy coat it for her. But I made the promise that things are so much better on the other side. I assured her that freedom was waiting for her. Then she asked me this question that’s really had me doing some thinking:

“Has it really been worth it for you on the other side?”

She has doubt and I really can’t blame her. The past three years of my life haven’t been what I expected them to be. I’ve been plagued by mysterious physical problems that have kept me from getting out of bed some days. Just when I think I’ve grieved the loss of my father, some crazy emotion comes out of nowhere. I’ve had friends and family walk away because of my decision to follow Christ with all of my heart.

She’s watched me suffer and it breaks her heart. Sometimes things were easier at 330 lbs. than they are now. (Not really. I just buried them and pretended like they didn’t exist.) But I was so glad she asked me that question.

I answer with a resounding YES! It’s totally worth it.

Indeed God has delivered me through some pretty trying times over these last few years. We’re walking through a struggle together right now. I’m sure to the world it looks crazy. But I’m ok with that. The more intimate I get with Jesus, the more I’m reminded I’m simply living in this world. I’m not part of it.

It’s been worth it because I know without a doubt God has been there through it all. He still is. I know because He promises . 

Are there days these struggles suck? Without a doubt. Are there days I don’t understand? You bet. But I still know that I know that I know that God is an amazing God who lavishes more love on me than I could ever deserve. All these attacks, all this crazy stuff that’s been happening is happening because Satan’s ticked off. The closer I get to Christ, the thicker the plot for revenge on my life gets.

I smile as I write that. Bring it on devil! Bring it on…

Though I’m not there yet, I’m closer than I used to be. For every attack that comes my way I want to smile. For every ailment thrown my way, I want to rejoice. For every struggle thrown into the mix of my path, I want to laugh with joy in the face of that roaring lion looking for someone to devour.

It’s worth it on the other side of freedom because God has and will sustain me. He promises and He’s not a liar.

Whatever you’re struggling with today. Whatever is holding your back from walking in freedom. Whatever fear is lying to you. I encourage you to throw your hands in the air today and tell God you’re all in. Surrender. Go for it. Don’t look back.

What do you need to surrender today? Comment below.. 

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Fruit Cups and Heart to Hearts is a post from: Sundi Jo

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