Elizabeth Guizzetti's Blog, page 14
May 4, 2014
Candace Knoebel’s The Gramm Curse: Nightwatchmen 0.5 has just been released!
Set before Everlasting, the addicting start to the Night Watchmen Series, The Gramm Curse is a novella told from Jaxen Gramm’s perspective.
How far is one willing to go for love?
Before finding a love that shakes the entire foundation of his world, Jaxen Gramm only had his Witch, Jezibelle Beaumont, to worry about. He’s her Hunter, and he will do whatever it takes to keep her safe from the curse placed on his bloodline, even if it means keeping her far from his heart.
But when a spell is offered that has the power to remove the curse, temptation clouds the ethical judgment of the Gramm brothers and their Witches.
In this action-packed novella, enter the dark recesses of Jaxen’s mind as he battles with himself over a decision that could not only cost him his life, but the life of fellow Coven members. Reunite with Gavin, Cassie, Mack, and Jezi as they dance around the dangers of a civil war on the brink of beginning.
My father once told me that loving someone is the easiest part of our job as a Primeval. He was wrong. They were, at one time, wise words coming from a wise man, but that was before I found out that loving someone would destroy them.
Before I realized that opening my heart was lethal.
As sure as the sun rises each day, this is my reality…my curse…and there’s no escaping it. I know this because it has destroyed my family, and as much as I’d like to believe I’m wrong, there’s not a single thing I can do to fix it. That was made painfully clear when my dad became another victim of the Gramm curse.
So screw feeling.
The leaves ruffle above the tree I stand under, shielding me in scattered shadows. It’s windy as shit, and I really don’t feel like standing around waiting in the freezing-ass cold for the next hunt. Waiting only leads to thinking, and thinking always leads to the past, and I’m tired of thinking about the shit I can’t change; about time ticking away the brittle minutes of what little life I have left.
Jezi pulls up to the curb and gets out of her small, beat-up car. My chest tightens at the sight of her. Years upon years I’ve spent building four steel walls around me, boxing me into a safe, small room with no outlet; no way for anyone to get in and get hurt. It’s the only way to protect myself, and to protect others from myself.
It would take someone stronger than diamonds to cut through what I’ve constructed, someone stronger than me, and Jezi just doesn’t have that kind of strength.
I push my shoulder harder into the tree I’m leaning against and welcome the sharp pain digging in my back. The pressure helps shift the gears in my head and reinforce the strength of my walls. I need to stay in the present. I’m not here to dwell on my problems. I have a job to do, and as long as there’s a breath in my body, I’ll keep fighting to protect humanity because at the end of the day, protecting others is the only thing I can devote myself to entirely without fear of killing them.
It’s the only thing in my life I can safely love.
Candace Knoebel is the award-winning author of Born in Flames-book one in a young adult fantasy trilogy. She discovered in 2009 through lunch breaks and late nights after putting her kids to bed, a world where she could escape the ever-pressing days of an eight to five Purgatory. And an outlet for all the voices residing in her head.
Published by 48fourteen in 2012, Born in Flames went on to win Turning the Pages Book of the Year award in February of 2013. In January of 2014, the last book in the trilogy, From the Embers, was released, thusly completing the trilogy. She now works on the Night Watchmen Series, while guzzling Red Bulls and pretending to be a ninja on Heelys.
Available exclusively on Amazon!
May 1, 2014
Just Released: Alternate Hilarities a new collection of short stories by editor Giovanni Francesco Valentino
Check out this new collection of short stories: Alternate Hilarities
In celebration for the new release there is a Rafflecopter giveaway!
1st prize: $50 Amazon Gift Card
2nd prize: $25 Amazon Gift Card
3rd prize: $10 Amazon Gift Card
Blurb:
Along time ago in a city in central New York ….
Alternate Hilarities
Episode 1
Back from the Dead
In the early nineties, a man had a dream. A dream of funny stories in his favorite genres, Science fiction, Fantasy and Horror. Not just a joke at the end of the episode like the original Star Trek or the occasional gem from Douglas Adams, but all the time.
So the small press fan-zine, Alternate Hilarities was born. Six issues were produced against his ex-wife’s express wishes.
And they were terrible!
Just Terrible!
It looked semiprofessional but proofing was not his strong suit. He had no funds to hire a proof reader and let’s face it, volunteers suck.
But the stories were great. Many talented authors sent in great funny stories. With concepts like games show in the afterlife, the last man alive and the secret life of a teenaged mad scientist.
But in the end, the cost of publishing his pet project became too much and the zine was retired.
Now, two decades later, the overhead and distribution issues of the small press have almost disappeared with the advent of eBooks. With a new partner in crime who can do line edits, with a professional level understanding of spelling, grammar and punctuation, the man decided to give his old love a second shot.
So, here it is, The New and Improved Alternate Hilarities. We have Alien invasions and Abductions, Time Travel, Ghost Ships, Demonic Possessions, Flatulent Clowns, Body Switching, Talking Monkeys and Feghoots.
That’s right, I said Feghoots.
Google it.
So off we go. With Science Fiction, Fantasy, Horror and Halitosis for all!
Halitosis? WTF? I mean Polarity?
Not Again! I mean H I l a r I t y?
Damn AutoCorrect!
With Stories by ….
Aaron Austin – Isabel Sterling – Day Al-Mohamed – Brenda Anderson – Jason Bougger
Gavin Cameron – A.B. Rinklin – Dan Doerflein – John H. Dromey – Christine EdwardsJaimie M. Engle – Eric James Spannerman – Steve Esling – Laura Thurston
Ronald Friedman – Jay Fuller – Danielle Gales – Steven Grassie - Cathy Greco
James E. Guin – Shari L Klase – Felicia LeeLance Manion – Daniel McPherson
Jez Patterson – M. Kelly Peach Clay Sheldon – Chuck Rothman – Josh Strnad
Giovanni Valentino - Adam Millard
Goodreads Link: https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/21855208-alternate-hilarities
Amazon Link:: http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B00JP035VM/ref=as_li_ss_tl?ie=UTF8&camp=1789&creative=390957&creativeASIN=B00JP035VM&linkCode=as2&tag=thecralifofgi-20
Smashword Link: https://www.smashwords.com/books/view/426670
About the Editor:
Giovanni Francesco Valentino has struggled at the art of writing for four decades against many demons like self-doubt, chronic depression, OCD and severe dyslexia. He has written a few memoir pieces about his life struggles going undiagnosed for more the half his life. He hopes one day to be a famous published science fiction and fantasy author.
He is a member of the CNY Writers Haven, a critique and writer support group. He is the editor of the upcoming humorous anthology, Alternate Hilarities.
Goodreads Profile Link: https://www.goodreads.com/author/show/7772307.Giovanni_Valentino
Website: http://giovannivalentino.blogspot.com/
Twitter: https://twitter.com/thegiovanniv
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/pages/The-Gi...
Strange Musings Press
We are a small publisher founded and run by two authors with a variety of skills and talents. Visit our Staff page for more information about who we are.
Currently, Strange Musings Press is strictly an e-publisher of anthologies: Alternate Hilarities , Romantic Ruckus, and Alternate Hilarities 2 – Vampires Suck . We DO NOT accept or publish stand alone stories, novels, or novellas at this time so please don’t query us for those. We’ll send you a humorous and snarky rejection letter.
The goal of these anthologies is to help aspiring authors get published and to have fun. Everything we do here is in the spirit of humor. If we offend you in any way, well, we probably don’t care =)
Take a moment to look around and submit a story or two if you’d like. Got questions? Got a joke you want to tell us? Want to tell us how awesome we are? Stand in line and send us an email at: strangemusings.editor@verizon.net.
Website: http://www.strangemusingspress.com/p/...
Twitter: https://twitter.com/strange_Musings
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/StrangeMusin...
Here is a list of some of the stories in Alternate Hilarities.
Attack of Ye Olde Zombies by Cathy Greco
And, thus, the world ends… not with a bang… not with a whimper… but with the mournful cry of an off-key bagpipe playing an undead reel, and the sad, sad sight of deflated codpieces never to be filled.
1-800-CALL-GOD by Chuck Rothman
Help is just a phone call away…
Adrift by Dan Doerflein
In life, he sailed the high seas with his pirate crew. All he wanted in death was to sail the seas again. Before he can escape his situation and obtain the afterlife he dreamed of, he must first defeat a pirate’s worst enemy: a bureaucrat.
The Princess and the Witch by Isabel Sterling
Marisa only wanted one thing for Halloween: the ancient magic she possessed in a past life. She’d prepared for this ritual for years, and nothing could get in her way. Except, perhaps, her sorority girl roommate.
The Muse and the Psychiatrist by M. Kelly Peach
She was divinely beautiful, a daughter of Zeus with a serious problem. She needed a qualified and caring psychiatrist, with talent and experience, to help her. Little did she know he had his own agenda…
Upgrades by Daniel McPherson
Software updates. Sometimes they install cool new features. Other times they screw up your entire system. Which really sucks when the software is running inside your head.
The Great Abyss Disjunction by Danielle N. Gales
When Gregory Artifex became lighthouse keeper of the multiverse’s loneliest dark corner, all he wanted was a little peace and quiet. The triggerfish, however, had different ideas. Gregory is about to have a very bad day.
The Bombastic Adventure of Bob from Planet 9 by Jaimie M. Engle
Bob and Melvin sit at Flo’s Intergalactic Greasy Spoon on the Tuesday the joint is held-up by two symmetrical beings called ‘humans’. Melvin accidentally disintegrates and Bob seeks revenge. But a visit to His Greatness on Planet 9 may change everything.
Do Flatulent Clowns Smell Funny by John H. Dromey
“Emission Possible” at the circus. The gastric suspense is intense. Will there be comic relief?
Dead Right, Dead Wrong By Ronald Friedman
The active Dead are not much different than the rest of us, although they can bore you to tears with stories about how they died. As the number of Dead increased they emerged from the shadows and became politically active. Their party, Dead Americans Mobilizing for National Integration and Tolerance (DAMNIT), was ready to field a candidate for the office of President of the United States.
Language Barrier by Steve Esling
“Mit-choo “Mitch” Maru is Tenerelli and Associate’s first Titanian accountant! But his progress in breaking social barriers and becoming more than just a “token alien” comes to a halt after a sticky situation in the bathroom with a coworker. Will the skills he learned in his college English courses be enough to tell others about this unfortunate close encounter?”
Small Change by Steven Grassie
Miserable and almost broke, as per usual Paul’s in the pub drowning his sorrows. His evening takes a strange turn, however, when he encounters an interesting, if rather implausible, individual… who might just have the answer to his problems.
Cash on Delivery by Laura Thurston
When you absolutely, positively have to have had it already call Einstein Express, where hindsight is the same as foresight.
Overdue by Jay Fuller
When the librarian can flay your mind as easily as she can gut you, very little will stand between her and an overdue library book – even a powerful (and generally disagreeable) wizard. And what if the book wants a say in the matter?
Diary of an Overlord by Clay Sheldon
Villagers are terrified, heroes quake in their boots, and the world fears his very name. Witness the origin of a terrifying(ish) demon lord. But be warned:not everything is as it seems…
Thorkwald and the Cherub by Day Al-Mohamed
The adventures of a misfit demon and his struggle to succeed, or at least not get fired (literally) in Hell’s corporate world. With the help of his trusty minion, an eight-legged llama, and his Ctrl-Alt-Smite button, what could go wrong?
Chicken Soup for the Demonically Possessed Soul by Felicia Lee
In this heartwarming tale of loss, redemption, and best practices for web design, we follow Al, a promising young man in the prime of his life, as he faces down the demons of unethical competitors and, well, actual demons.
April 21, 2014
Norwescon Wrapup
So I am back from Norwescon held at the Doubletree by Hilton Seattle Airport April 17–20 2014. As I said, I was in the Writer’s
Row primarily promoting Other Systems. I was between Mark Monlux the author of The Comic Critic and Thomas Gondolfi of TANSTAAFL Press I was just down the halls from Zachary Bonelli and Aubry K. Andersen of Fuzzy Hedgehog Press so I was pretty close to friends. h
On Friday night, I went to the book launch of Bless Your Mechanical Heart which was published by Evil Girlfriend Media. 
On Saturday night, I went to Rhiannon Held’s Reading of Reflected. I saw so many great friends includingAndrea Howe of Blue Falcon Editing, Author Sue Boelich, Esther Reed Jones (I missed seeing Frog Jones, but he was there.) among others.
This year’s theme is Elegance and Entropy and the Guests of Honor Include: elegance and Entropy
Writer: Michael Moorcock
Artist: Robert Gould
Special: Seanan McGuire
Science: Catherine S. Plesko
Costuming: Anima! X
Publisher: 47 North
April 16, 2014
On my way to Norwescon!
So tomorrow I’ll be on my way to Norwescon I”ll be in the Writer’s Row primarily promoting Other Systems, but I’ll have copies of Out for Souls&Cookies and Faminelands. I’ll have bookmarks and buttons to hand out, so come on by!
Norwescon is held at the Doubletree by Hilton Seattle Airport April 17–20 2014 and one of the largest Pacific Northwest’s Science Fiction and Fantasy Conventions. If you like science Fiction and Fantasy novels, anime, costuming, art, gaming, check it out.
This year’s theme is Elegance and Entropy and the Guests of Honor Include: elegance and Entropy
Writer: Michael Moorcock
Artist: Robert Gould
Special: Seanan McGuire
Science: Catherine S. Plesko
Costuming: Anima! X
Publisher: 47 North
April 11, 2014
Does this get any easier? An author/artist’s guide to utter insecurity.
So this is an oldie, but goodie post about author insecurity, I did 3 years ago. I was talking to a friend about it, and just got a complement on how much it helped someone so I thought I’d repost it.
Originally posted on ZB's Blog of Awesomeness:
Someone has finally called me an author. In public. And in the context of differentiating between an author and a writer.
This was true complement to my work. It was not accompanied by a coy smirk, subtle eye roll or adding “she draws comics…” In fact, it was one of the most rewarding words that I heard. Something I have been waiting to hear most of my adult life. It’s true. I am an author.
It’s also true that I am artist. My best friend and I do fantastic in the world of indy comics. We’ve sold out complete runs of books. However beyond the sales, every year, my work gets better. (Practice makes perfect) so I don’t know why my tummy rebels at a word.
Outside, I felt flushed. I was in a restaurant, in a booth, surrounded on all sides by people, so I wasn’t getting away. Still…
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April 7, 2014
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March 24, 2014
ECCC here we come…
We will be at Booth 505 at Emerald City Comic Con this weekend. ECCC is the premier comic book and pop culture convention in the pacific northwest! If you are looking for us, we are exhibiting under my name: Elizabeth Guizzetti.
Here is what you will fine at our booth:
Out for Souls & Cookies 5 will debut this weekend and we have copies of all the back issues including the Christmas Special.
We also have paperback copies of Other Systems and all three issues of Faminelands.
We will be giving away swag. We will be having a huge giveaway at our booth. You can win everything from sketches to postcard sets to books.
Aubry Andersen will be in my booth representing Fuzzy Hedgehog Press selling paperback copies of The Winter and The Spring as well as Zachary Bonelli’s novel Voyage: Embarkation
We hope to see you there!
March 20, 2014
Review of Isaac the Fortunate: The Spring
Here is my review of The Spring which is the next book in the Isaac The Fortunate Series.
I loved The Winter and all I can say is wow for The Spring. AoKA’s engaging characters and beautiful descriptions will transport you to medieval Switzerland where you follow Eostre–the mysterious lady from the Winter who gives the farmer Beltran the Golden Bridle.
After the death of her drunken father, she goes to a nunnery. She begins having visions that leave her confused, lost, and in deep trouble with the other nuns. She sees her best friend another novice alive and then she sees her dead from a plague. Then other nuns are alive and dead.
Eostre begins to doubt her own sanity as she wonders what is real. As the timelines converge, well, I don’t want to spoil it for anyone.
AoKA has a beautiful style and the poetic descriptions left me hungering for more. She doest they beautiful black and white “woodcut” style illustrations. I look forward to The Summer!
March 16, 2014
The fate of The Light Side of the Moon has been decided!
The Light Side of the Moon will be published by 48Fourteen!
In Other Systems, the Kiposi built space elevators on Earth to get humans, livestock and seed cheaply off the planet. I knew I wanted to explore other aspects of space colonization and I began the second of a series of companion novels each focusing on a separate aspect of the human condition in the far future. The Light Side of the Moon will focus on the rebuilding of Earth’s space program.
Human colonists from another planet seek young people to populate their utopian colony. Many are tested, few are chosen. The Light Side of the Moon is the story of those who remained in Earth’s solar system.
Ella Sethdottier’s family lives in extreme poverty, barely surviving on the training wage system. When her mother dies from the flu and her older brother Dan is fired from his job, Ella is arranged to be married to an elderly groom to keep her warm and safe.
Determined to make a better life for herself, but with no prospects, she follows rumors halfway around the world with the hope of working on Lunar Colony Tranquility. The road is fraught with danger, but she makes her way thousands of kilometers to the Paris Space Elevator, meeting a variety of people along the way, including a family of broken down androids who decide to accompany her. Ella and the androids indenture themselves to the warden as servants and companions for his family.
On Luna, Ella escapes dire poverty, however she must navigate the treacherous paths of life in a place where one misstep can mean disaster. Corrupt guards take comfort from the prison population as the conflicted warden tries to keep the peace. As colony’s relentless hardships intensify, Ella forges an unlikely friendship with the idealistic dreamer, Dr. Ian Whitlatch. The two draw strength from one each other to defeat formidable enemies—hunger, riots, inconsistent supply drops, and the insidious effects of low gravity—and find the strength to build a utopia.
Want more information?
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March 13, 2014
Why does an author end a series….
Today the final page of Faminelands: Book 3 Mareton’s Curse went up on the webcomic. I am proud of what I accomplished with the series and this is a bittersweet moment for me. Though I am not saying I will never go venture to Talamh with pen in hand, I also believe in being honest with the fans. At this time: it is unlikely.
Our reasons are simply practical.
Though I enjoyed the creation of Faminelands Book 3, post production did not go well. Its Kickstarter failed, but I produced the book anyway. We did a minimal run, but a full-color, perfect bound project we were never able to get our costs down. Though there were avid fans of the series for whom I am truly thankful, and we sold out of our first run of The Carp’s Eye, Faminelands #3 did not sell well in 2103, and our sales have dropped to 0 in 2014.
Faminelands has always been a project of love. I knew going into it that some people would hear the words ” mercanary elf” and started running in the other direction. However I have also spent thousands of dollars and hours. I need to pull the plug.
As some of you know Faminelands Vol 1: The Carp’s Eye was not only my first book, but it was how I taught myself how to create comics after years of painting landscapes and baby room murals. This act of creation defined who I wanted to be as an artist and author as well as set up the kind of books I wanted to write. So Faminelands has a special place in my heart. It always will. At the same time, there are other projects that I want to work on. A 100 page graphic novel takes me approximately 800 hours in production, post production. And forever to sell.
Ultimately, my heart is no longer on this project and its bleeding me dry.
Maria had to scale back the hours, she is able to give to the projects. Though it was a bit dicey for awhile, I think we figured out what is going to work for both of us.
All that being said, if you want to know about Lark and Orin the webcomic is still up (in fact at least for the time being the store still has the Faminelands Banner since I need to send in the ZB Template) And we will keep a small amount of stock if you want to order the books. To be clear, though this series has ended, as a company, Maria and I are not going anywhere. In fact though 2014 is a year to regroup and end a few dangling projects. Out for Souls&Cookies #5 is being released starting March 27, 2015.
At Emerald City Comic Con, we will be having a huge raffle of both Faminelands and Out for Souls&Cookies swag, books, and sketches.
We have some exciting news about 2015 that I look forward to announcing later this year.
