Cordelia Kingsbridge's Blog, page 19

Hi! How did you about getting your diagnosis for ADD? Like what was the process like for you?

Well, I was seeing my PCP for treatment for depression, but nothing we tried was working. So she referred me to the behavioral health office in the same medical home for medication management.

While I was discussing my symptoms with the psychiatry PA (physician’s assistant), she pointed out how severely I’d rated my problems with things like focus, concentration, restlessness, goal-directed behavior, etc. I told her I thought they were just symptoms of depression - which they frequently are - and she said she wanted to have me tested just to check out the possibility of a comorbid attention deficit. Because depression and ADD originate in different parts of the brain, treating the depression alone wouldn’t be enough to alleviate those symptoms if I was experiencing both disorders.

I took a CPT, which is a computerized test of sustained attention, and the results from that test along with a review of my clinical history resulted in the diagnosis. I have to admit, I didn’t actually believe I had ADD until after the testing. And even then, there was still part of me that doubted it - until I took the medication and experienced immediate, dramatic improvement in pretty much every area of my mental health.

It just makes me feel… normal. Like something clicked into place in my brain that’s been missing for a long time, if that makes sense.

scillsthrills replied to your post: (Late) Sunday Update ...

scillsthrills replied to your post:
(Late) Sunday Update

“real estate in the plot structure” this is? so beautiful??? i will now think of story plots as actual real estate physical space and you can’t stop me

I wouldn’t dream of it! I’ve always found this a helpful conceptualization of narrative structure. :-)

(Late) Sunday Update

I forgot to do this yesterday! Working from home, sometimes you lose track of which day of the week it is. ;-)

I got a lot of work done on A Chip and a Chair this weekend, thanks to my new ability to sustain focus and energy for more than 30 minutes at a time. I’ve caught up to a point where I feel pretty confident about meeting my goals for the rough draft.

Right now, I’m in the midst of writing what’s called “the final push” in the three-act plot structure I use. That’s the part of the third act in which events are ramping up to the big climax. Since CAAC is the last book in the series, the third act is the final act not just of the book, but of the series itself. That means it takes up a bigger chunk of real estate in the plot structure than it normally would, and I feel like I’ve been writing it for 40 years.

I’m hoping to have written all the way through the end of the climax by the close of this coming weekend. Then will come the aftermath/wrap-up scenes, and I also have to go back and write a couple of scenes in the middle that I just left placeholders for since I hadn’t worked out some crucial details yet. That should put me on track to finish the rough draft by mid-October, which is what I’m aiming for.

I’ll also be working on the Assistant ‘Verse this week, writing towards the October 5 update, and hopefully I’ll finish putting together the story masterlist I’m compiling for Patreon as well.

Have a great week, everyone!

i don't have ADD myself, but my best friend and brother both do and since i've known them my whole life i know how hard it is to deal with at times. i'm so glad you're feeling better!

Thank you so much! I do feel like things are turning a corner now. :D

Check out the official One-Eyed Royals playlist on Spotify!1. “Natural” by Imagine DragonsRather be...

Check out the official One-Eyed Royals playlist on Spotify!

1. “Natural” by Imagine Dragons

Rather be the hunter than the prey

2. “The Devil Within” by Digital Daggers

You’ll never know what hit you

3. “War of Hearts” by Ruelle

I can’t help but love you, even though I try
not to

4. “Wicked Ones” by Dorothy

This night ain’t for the faint of heart

5. “Wrong Side of Heaven” by Five Finger
Death Punch

I saw the devil today and he looked a lot
like me

6. “Even If It Hurts” by Sam Tinnesz

You don’t need to do this alone

7. “Oh Lord” by In This Moment

Am I the righteous or the damned?

8. “Timebomb” by Bad Seed Rising

I’m about to blow

9. “Taciturn” by Stone Sour

Maybe tonight I’ll tell you everything

10. “Born Ready” by Zayde Wolf

I don’t believe in no devil ‘cause I done
raised this hell

Other Seven of Spades playlists:

Kill Game, Trick Roller, Cash Plays

Hi! I'm really enjoying the SoS series, especially with the playlists you've made for each book! I was wondering if the order of the songs on the playlists is significant/relates to how the books progress? I think some songs might be tied to specific chara

You are 100% right! Most of the songs in the Seven of Spades playlists are chosen for their relationship to a specific scene. And the order they fall in the playlists is in chronological order of when they occur in the books.

The first song in each playlist is thematic, like an opening credits song in a movie or TV show. And the final song is the “end credits” song, chosen for the way it defines the major message of the book as a whole. (That’s why each playlist is named for the last song.) The songs in between are primarily tied to specific scenes, but occasionally they’re a more abstract representation of a character or relationship.

I sometimes listen to music while I’m writing, but more often, I wear earplugs to minimize distractions from ambient sounds. But when I do have music on, if I hear a song that would be perfect for a playlist (which happens a lot), I take a note of it so I don’t forget.

I start the playlist construction process while we’re line editing each manuscript. As I’m going through the book from start to finish, I jot down all of the significant emotional beats and themes on a sheet of paper. Then I go back later and pare the list down to the ten most important, see which songs in my notes fit well, and use Spotify to find the rest.

Your question reminded me that I haven’t posted the One-Eyed Royals playlist here yet, so I’m going to do that now. This one is my favorite so far - making playlists definitely has a learning curve to it, and I think I’ve improved over time! ;-)

To the anon who sent me the playlist question - I did get your ask, and it’s awesome! It deserves a...

To the anon who sent me the playlist question - I did get your ask, and it’s awesome! It deserves a more thorough response than I have time to give it tonight, so I’m saving it for tomorrow. :-)

Still gaspimg from the last AV-update! So hot and so horrible, I don't know which got my heart beating faster. It makes for an amazing experience to feel torn, a little like Desi. I want him to get out and be safe AND I'm so turned on at the same time. Wo

Hah, thank you! It’s fun to indulge in that dirtybadwrong every once in a while. ;-)

Feel free to ignore as I'm not sure what you're comfortable sharing. But what is it like trying to write or commit to a deadline with ADD?

So much fun! LOL.

In all seriousness, since I never knew I had ADD, I’ve always believed that my difficulty maintaining focus for sustained periods was either (a) a consequence of depression (which certainly was aggravating the problem) or (b) me being lazy. And don’t get me wrong - I am lazy. It’s definitely my personal sin of the Seven Deadlies. But now I’m starting to be able to tell the difference.

For most of my life, except for the times when my depression was really severe, I’ve been able to grit my teeth and force productivity out of myself through sheer willpower. I always kind of thought that was normal, you know? After the past two days taking ADD meds, however, I’m like… oh. So this is what it’s like to be able to focus and be productive without fighting your own brain every second of the day. Nice.

It’s still quite early, of course, and it may take me a bit of time to adjust. But I’ve felt more optimistic about the future over the past two days than I have in… years, honestly.

In completely unshocking news, finally treating my previously undiagnosed ADD (with medication that...

In completely unshocking news, finally treating my previously undiagnosed ADD (with medication that took a month to be authorized by my insurance company) has markedly improved my quality of life in just a single day. I can’t believe I made it to the age of 31 never knowing this was a problem that needed to be addressed!