Matador Network's Blog, page 2268

Skiing the northern mtns of Norway

When arctic explorer Doug Stoup asked me to join his expedition to Svalbard, Norway, to ski on the planet’s northernmost mountain range, I figured it would be more of a novelty. What I didn’t realize was the terrain and snow conditions would be world class.

Our journey began in Longyearbyen (population 2,000), roughly 800km from the North Pole, a whaling community turned coal mining town that currently features one grocery store, a couple of overpriced hotels, and a scattering of bright colored buildings. With less than 60km of roadway, the best (and virtually only) way to get around is by snowmobile. So our team of seven loaded up a small fleet of snowmobiles, along with towing sleds carrying all of the necessary gear and supplies to survive and ski for two weeks. Leaving fuel caches along the way, it took 12 hours to reach our final destination, the Atomfjella Glacier, containing the highest mountains on the island.

The following is a collection of photographs I captured while on the remote glacier for those two weeks. After the adventure was over, I had no hesitation in saying there is absolutely no better place to ski in the world than Svalbard during the month of May.

1

Longyearbyen home base
Longyearbyen, the world's northernmost town, acted as home base. We spent two days here preparing for our excursion north to the Atomfjella Glacier.





2

12-hour snowmobile
The first minutes of our 12 hours spent on sleds. The route north lead us past three calving glaciers spilling into the frozen ocean. With 24 hours of daylight, we had plenty of time to take in all the sights.





3

Cozy basecamp
Things were cozy at basecamp. Right outside the doorstep was some of the best couloir skiing I have ever seen. It was May but temps were still cold this far north and the snow was powder on all aspects. At this point our stoke was reaching epic proportion.





Intermission





Skiing Death Valley: Outtakes from the Men’s Journal Expedition





Powder days on the Gaspé Peninsula, Quebec [pics]





20 pics to make you wish you were heli-skiing Alaska












4

Rabbit Ears couloir
Reggie Crist and Doug Stoup hiking up what we later named Rabbit Ears. This couloir was easily 3,000 vertical feet and drained directly into camp.





5

Ski all day, all night
Reggie Crist skiing late evening...or was it early morning? With the sun never setting time became irrelevant, as depicted in this photo. Is 4:30am sunrise or sunset? Basecamp is barely visible in the upper right of the photo.





6

Never-ending sunsets
Sunsets stretched on for hours. Here, Lexi Dupont took advantage.





7

Morning commute
Surrounded by epic lines and fresh snow, the morning commute from basecamp couldn't have been more rewarding.





8

The Noorderlicht
During the summer months, the Noorderlicht sails tourists around the northern fjords of Svalbard. When the winter months roll around it becomes dormant, frozen in ice while the dogs come out to play.





9

Frozen ocean
Reggie Crist, Lexi Dupont, and Doug Stoup glide along over the frozen ocean, dwarfed by the timeless beauty of this land.





Intermission





Powder for Powder, ep. 5: Heli-skiing Haines, Alaska





Powder for Powder, ep. 2: ALCAN adventure





Bringing in the New Year at Great Canadian Heli Skiing












10

Aqua pura
Melting glaciers and pressures from within create the purest water fountain on Earth. Lexi Dupont bows to Mother Nature for a taste of Svalbard.





11

Local inhabitants
After giving birth and spending three months in her den caring for her cubs, a mother polar bear searches for nourishment.





12

Goodbye!
A polar bear cubs waves goodbye as we depart Svalbard.

The post Skiing the northernmost mountains in the world: Svalbard, Norway appeared first on Matador Network.

The 20 wildest festivals on Earth

If you find yourself bored with good old house party bong sessions, how about mass-scale paint wars with hundreds if not thousands of people out of their minds on marijuana-laced beverages?

From over-the-top mud wrestling to galactic electronic music gatherings, here are 20 all-time parties and festivals you should make it to at least once in your lifetime.

1

Holi
Holi is an ancient Hindu festival that takes place around March in India and Nepal. Participants down mad amounts of bhang, a cannabis beverage, and then go nuts in the streets with epic "battles" of colored powder and water.
(via)





2

Boryeong Mud Festival
Originally conceived as a marketing effort for mud cosmetics in Boryeong, South Korea, the two-week festival is a major stop on the 'independent travelers looking to get fucked up' trail. The most popular days of the festival typically fall on the second weekend of July.
(via)





3

Electric Daisy Carnival
Electric Daisy Carnival in Las Vegas recently drew 345,000 people overdosing on bass drops and pool parties over three days in June.
(via)





Intermission





8 ways to celebrate summer in Copenhagen





Planning for the Pamplona bull run





How people party in Los Angeles (and why you can’t hang)












4

Tomorrowland
Tomorrowland takes place the last weekend of July in Boom, Belgium. Over 180,000 people who don't want to have hearing when they're older hit the scene to hear hundreds of DJs perform.
(via)





5

Ultra Music Festival
Held in Miami, Ultra Music Festival attracts over 330,000 partiers looking to combine warm weather and electronic dance music. In 2013, pre-sale tickets sold out in a matter of seconds.
(via)





6

La Tomatina
Every August, La Tomatina takes place in the Valencian town of Buñol, where 40 metric tons of tomatoes are thrown in a massive food-fight, giving 20,000 revelers their daily dose of vegetables.
(via, via, via, via





7

Roskilde
Roskilde, one of Europe's largest festivals, attracts artists ranging from synthpop to hip-hop. Held in June or July each year, the festival attracts over 100,000 people and includes a naked run for those who feel wearing clothing is too mainstream.
(via)





8

Songkran
During Songkran, Thailand's traditional New Year's Day from April 13-15, participants “attack” each other with water thrown from buckets, shot from water guns, and sprayed from hoses. Even the elephants join the battle.
(via)





9

Distortion
Copenhagen's Distortion pops up in random locations all over the city during the week of the first Saturday in June. From boat parties to block parties, thousands party around Copenhagen for five days in five different locations.
(via, via, via)





Intermission





Quebec City Festival: Starts tomorrow!





Matador’s 6 most overrated New Year’s Eve celebrations





6 tips for safe moshing in dangerous places












10

Queen's Day
On April 27, Amsterdam is colored orange as people celebrate from the streets to the canals. Over a million revelers party all day and night, closing the city centre to cars and trams.
(via)





11

Full Moon Party
An all-night beach party on Ko Pha Ngan in Thailand, the Full Moon Party takes place around every full moon. Fire-skipping ropes, drugs, and alcohol buckets abound—the event is a stop for every traveler trying to wake up the next day with no memory of the night before.
(via, via, via)





12

Rock in Rio
Originally held in Brazil, Rock in Rio now moves from city to city (2014's festival will be held in Lisbon). With the last event attracting over 700,000 people, there's no shortage of eclectic music, drinking, and dancing.
(via)





13

San Fermin Festival
Over a million people invade Pamplona, Spain to participate in the festival of San Fermin. Those brave enough (and willing to get a potential horn to the chest) participate in the running of the bulls during this event.
(via)





14

Glastonbury
A five-day music festival held near Pilton, Somerset, England on the last weekend of June, Glastonbury is one of the world's largest. Secret shows have been played by Radiohead and Skrillex for those in the know.
(via)





15

Battle of the Oranges
The Battle of the Oranges is a festival held in the Italian city of Ivrea. “Teams” beam each other with oranges in the largest food fight in Italy. Spectators are urged to wear red hats, unless they're really craving high-velocity oranges to the teeth.
(via)





Intermission





Win a Sansa slotRadio Player for the love of music and the love of travel





The best places to catch live music in New Orleans





18 amazing glass floor experiences [pics]












16

Rio Carnaval
The Carnaval in Rio de Janeiro, the largest carnival in the world, takes place yearly before Lent. Two million people swell the streets of Rio daily during the festival, drinking and sambaing their way through the city.
(via)





17

Coachella
With 2013's iteration becoming the highest-grossing festival ever, Coachella brings hundreds of thousands to Southern California's interior to party in the desert sun and watch a Tupac hologram perform every once in a while.
(via)





18

Burning Man
In late August, Black Rock Desert in Nevada is transformed into an experimental community of self-expression, where burners set up camp and forget about sleep for the next week before burning down the Man at the center of Black Rock City.
(via)





19

Bay to Breakers
Originally a footrace meant to raise San Francisco's spirits after the 1906 earthquake, Bay to Breakers has become a “race” of over 100,000 costumed participants. Alcohol, nudity, and drugs abound, it's the largest mobile party of its kind.
(via)





20

Oktoberfest
Every September, over 6 million people head to Munich for the 16-day event known as Oktoberfest. Women wearing traditional Bavarian dresses serve large beers to patrons looking to stumble back to their beds.
(via, via, via)

The post 20 of the world’s biggest music festivals and mega-parties to experience before you die appeared first on Matador Network.

Why the 7 Wonders of the World suck

So I’ve had this conversation a few times:

It’s weird how the Seven Wonders of the World list is so extraordinarily well known, yet somehow nobody knows what it really means. They all seem to think it’s some objectively compiled list of glorious buildings, as though there’s a Seven Wonders Police that evaluates the list every year and keeps it updated with only the bestest things ever.

In reality, it’s absolutely nothing of the sort, and has no basis whatsoever in sensible art appreciation. In fact it’s one of the dumbest ways of evaluating the worth of architectural marvels that draw legions of awestruck visitors each and every year.

Let’s dive into the rabbit hole, shall we?

What counts as a Wonder of the World?

Here’s where it gets tricky. People tend to think the only qualification is awesomeness, but that’s not even close. The Seven Wonders of the Ancient World has very little to do with how wonderful things are.

What the hell are they, you ask? Well, to find out, we have to go way back to the beginning. Of civilization.

Thousands of years ago, back when the Greeks were busy inventing democracy and taking naked baths together, a few of them ventured out into the world, discovering works of magnificent art, from pyramids to lighthouses to gardens. Yes, gardens. And they wrote about them. And compiled them into lists of their favorite seven.

That’s right, kids. The Seven Wonders of the Ancient World was nothing more than an Ancient Greek bucket list.

There was no “correct” list of Seven Wonders, just as today there’s no “correct” list of favorite places. Everyone has their own. But many of the entries matched up with each other, because, well, the world was barely civilized back then. If something amazing was out there, chances were it’d show up on everybody’s list.

And as history went on, a few of the more famous lists, such as those from Antipater and Philo, and secondhand references to a much earlier list by Herodotus, came to be seen as the important ones. So although everyone had their own, the world did indeed settle on a single, official answer. Behold:

The Seven Wonders of the Ancient World

In order of construction:

Great Pyramid of Giza
Hanging Gardens of Babylon
Tempe of Artemis at Ephesus
Statue of Zeus at Olympia
Mausoleum at Halicarnassus
Colossus of Rhodes
Lighthouse of Alexandria

In display order (not chronological): Great Pyramid, Hanging Gardens, Temple of Artemis, Statue of Zeus, Mausoleum at Halicarnassus, Colossus of Rhodes, Lighthouse of Alexandria. The painting is by Maarten van Heemskerck, a 16th century Dutch painter.

The Lighthouse only just barely made the list. For a long time, the Ishtar Gate of Babylon was #7.

You may have noticed you haven’t seen many of these showing up as National Geographic cover photos lately. That’s because most of them are gone. Sadly, the only one remaining is the Great Pyramid of Giza. Pyramids can’t fall down.

Notice anything else weird about the list? Yeah. Let’s discuss.

“Why isn’t _______ a Wonder of the World?”

You’ve probably heard it before. “Why not the Taj Mahal? Or Tikal? Or Stonehenge? Or the Great Wall? Or Angkor Wat? Or anything awesome?!?!!?”

Most people seem to get annoyed when they hear the Eiffel Tower isn’t one of the Seven Wonders. Or the Dome of the Rock, or Machu Picchu, or whatever. They’re wondrous, right? They’re in the world, right?!?! So why aren’t they Wonders of the World?!?!

Remember that list above? Well, it was developed from around 500 BC to about 0 AD. By Greeks, traveling around…Greece, basically.

So not only does the list include only things built before that time, but it also includes only things built within that area. That’s as far as they could explore without cars and stuff. So it should really be called the Seven Wonders of Ancient Greece and Nearby Environs.

Doesn’t sound so cool now, does it?

Now, to be fair, what was going on in Ancient Greece and Mesopotamia was pretty great. Chances are that if they had done a real Wonders of the World list, and traveled all over the globe to find the absolute best, it would look pretty much the same. Except they might have added the Great Wall, which existed during that time.

But as time goes on, it makes less and less sense to view the Seven Wonders as a “best-of” list. It’s just a neat historical document of something that happened in Ancient Greece, not a list of the world’s most wonderful things. For the most part, they literally don’t even exist anymore.

Which is why so many cool buildings don’t count. No building you’ve ever seen, except the Pyramid, is a Wonder of the World. So if anyone ever asks, “Is this a Wonder of the World?” The answer is no. Unless it’s the Pyramid.

The “New” Seven Wonders

Over the years, plenty of people and organizations have compiled their own versions, including specific lists for modern engineering marvels, natural formations, celestial bodies, and all sorts of other fun stuff. This is a neat idea, and it’s a nice way to get people interested in marvelous things around the world, though it’s by no means “official” in any way.

There was, however, a massive undertaking to select what came to be known as the New Seven Wonders of the World. Given that most ancient wonders are now nothing but dust, the organizers wanted to compile a list of humanity’s most magnificent, still-standing monuments. They chose the method of a worldwide vote, receiving 100 million votes in the process.

The survey immediately raised the question of whether a global popularity contest is the best way to select the world’s greatest architectural marvels, as well as the problem of keeping the list at a mere seven, despite 2,000 extra years of history since the first such lists were drafted.

These are problems, of course, but…well, we all want to know the answers, right? In 2007, the New Seven Wonders of the World votes were unveiled. In (approximate) order of construction:

Great Wall of China
Petra
Coliseum
Chichen Itza
Machu Picchu
Taj Mahal
Christ the Redeemer

In display order (not chronological): Chichen Itza, Christ the Redeemer, Great Wall, Machu Picchu, Petra, Taj Mahal, Coliseum. Images via Wikimedia Commons.

The Great Pyramid of Giza was grandfathered in as an Ancient Wonder, so it wasn’t part of the new list.

Once again, there’s nothing official about the results. It’s literally a global popularity contest, with the quantity of votes cast consisting of 1.4% of the human population (admittedly including the problem of people voting multiple times), so it’s by no means scientific, but it does represent what (part of) humanity has chosen as our collective grand achievements. And…well, it’s certainly not bad.

But I bet Brazil did some serious campaigning to get its Cristo up there. I mean, come on, guys. No Eiffel Tower? No Hagia Sophia?!?! Oh well. The arguments could go on all day, and will probably go on for the next 2,000 years.

But you know what’s really weird about this list? No Parthenon.

That’s right, boys and girls. Since the original Wonders are all gone, the guys who came up with the Seven Wonders list in the first place are absent from both lists, ancient and new. Greece is home to *zero* Wonders of the World.

I bet they’ve been drowning their sorrows in ouzo ever since.

Sorry, Greece. Maybe 2,000 years from now we’ll have a new vote and maybe you’ll make it. In the meantime, the world is still full of wonders. Time to explore!

This article originally appeared at Snarky Nomad and is reprinted here with permission.

The post Why the Seven Wonders of the World are totally stupid appeared first on Matador Network.

20 years from now, what kinds of trends will piss us off?

I USED TO get frustrated teaching my grandmother how to use the computer, or my dad how to text. I cannot imagine explaining what a “selfie” is to someone who has never even see a cell phone. Technology has always come easily to me, and I feel like I’ve been able to keep up with the pace well. But I often wonder if I’ll get to a point in my life, where pop culture and lifestyle innovations are developing so fast, it makes it hard to let go of the familiar things.

It’s easy to say “Get with the times, man!” but you have to remember — the term “selfie” wasn’t even around five years ago. When I get older, what kinds of trends will piss me off? What sorts of “cool” things won’t I understand?

The post 20 years from now, what kinds of trends will piss us off? appeared first on Matador Network.

How to piss off someone who meditates

Photo: digitalpimp.

Ask, “Don’t you get sore sitting in one position for so long?”

Of course you do! The point of meditation is not to feel perfectly happy folded onto a zafu cushion…it’s to recognize when you feel stiff or sore and notice it before letting it go. Unpleasant situations arise in life all the time and you can’t do anything about them, so meditation is good practice for being able to deal with problems without freaking out and believing your legs are going to fall off.

Also, little-known fact, Buddha actually said there are four positions to meditate in, and each one should be practiced as much as the others: sitting, standing, walking, and lying down. So if you get sore from sitting…try walking for a change!

Assume the point of meditating is to reach Nirvana.

It turns out, Nirvana (or Nibbana, depending on which tradition you follow) is kind of a side effect — the real benefit of meditation is meditation itself. The concept of karma is often mistranslated as meaning, “If you do good stuff, you’ll get good stuff,” like some kind of cosmic reward cycle; what it really amounts to is, if you take good actions, as a consequence you will be a good person, which is a pretty great outcome (and vice versa: If you take negative actions, you will be a negative person, which is not so great).

Meditation is kind of like that. If you meditate a lot, you’ll be a person who meditates a lot. Which is the point.

Remind us of the five hindrances.

These five obstacles to successful meditation pop up for even the most advanced meditator. They are: sensory desire (wanting to see or hear something to distract yourself), ill-will (getting angry or having hateful thoughts about someone or something), sloth or torpor (sleepiness), restlessness or worry (the inability to calm the mind and focus), and doubt (believing this whole meditation thing is kind of pointless anyway).

Everybody gets these every now and then, and one of my meditation teachers was prone to what he called “multiple hindrance attacks,” where he would get all five at once! On the bright side, Buddha said the best solution to getting sleepy while meditating was to have a nap first, so you have official permission to snooze.

Ask us what our mantra is.

Not everyone who meditates has a mantra (a word or phrase that’s used to focus the mind, and is repeated) but for many who do, their mantra is private. It may have been given to them by a teacher, it might be one they picked themselves, but asking about it is kind of like asking someone exactly what they’re praying about. It’s sort of personal, you know?

Be a competitive meditator.

As Christopher Marlowe said, “Comparisons are odious.” Nobody wants to be in competition, especially about something as personal and noncompetitive as meditation. So prattling on about how many hours you sat, all the silent retreats you’ve been to or famous teachers you’ve studied with, and the number of times you’ve reached complete mindfulness are sure to make other people cranky.

It’s okay if you want to share your experience, but doing it so other people feel less good about their own practice is pretty unskillful behaviour.

Assume there’s only one way to sit.

There are lots of different ways to sit in meditation, if you enjoy sitting. You can sit in simple cross-legged position. Sometimes it’s helpful to sit on a cushion to elevate the hips. Other people use a kneeling bench that allows them to fold their legs under them. If sitting on the ground makes your knees hurt, you can sit in a chair or the edge of a bed.

You’re even allowed to change position while you meditate, provided you do it very mindfully (assuming your tradition allows that — Zen meditators, for example, often teach that you can’t shift at all for the duration of your zazen practice). There are as many ways to sit as there are personal preferences for sitting, so find one that works for you and stick with it!

State that if you can’t meditate for an hour, you might as well not meditate at all.

Even five minutes of meditation is better than nothing at all! One of my teachers told me that the whole point of meditation is to become more mindful of your daily activities. If you can only be mindful while sitting on a cushion, that isn’t particularly effective, because you don’t sit on a cushion that often. Instead, you’re grocery shopping, jogging, and brushing your teeth. So if you can do mindful grocery shopping and tooth-brushing meditation, he said, you’re doing it exactly right.

The post How to piss off someone who meditates appeared first on Matador Network.

This camera trick lets you SEE sound

Have you ever wondered what sound looks like? Probably not, right? We tend to think of sound as something that can only be perceived through the ears and not through the eyes, but as it happens, there’s a neat camera trick that can allow you to see sound waves in real time. It’s called “Schlieren flow visualization,” and it basically involves using two parabolic mirrors, a high-speed camera, and science (I’m going to leave it to the video to give the actual explanation).

The end result is that we’re able to see silhouetted visualizations of all sorts of different sounds, from the clap of a hand, to the firing of an AK-47, to the explosion of a firecracker.

The post This amazing camera trick lets you SEE sound appeared first on Matador Network.

10 signs you're an Argentine

Photo: Daniel Iván

Hacé clic para leer este artículo en español. Tambien podés darnos un “me gusta” en Facebook!

1. You address everyone as if they’re family.

You’d use the informal “vos” even with the Pope, who’d appreciate it, of course, because he’s Argentine.

2. You’re not afraid to kiss.

You greet everyone with a kiss — the teachers, the waiters, whoever. And you send virtual kisses in every email, whether it’s about work, love, or a fight: “Te mando un beso grande.”

3. If you see a car with a plastic bottle on its hood/roof, you know that…

It’s for sale! Nobody seems to know exactly where this custom came from, but it’s as universal as having asado on Sunday. Argentina remains for me, after years living as an expatriate, a red Torino with a bottle of bleach on its roof.

4. You know exactly what a bidet is for.

And, dammit, if only they were available everywhere! Unfortunately, it seems like other countries have overlooked this convenient way to keep their “pudendas” clean.

More like this: 15 differences between a normal friend and an Argentinean friend


5. You’ve pushed a broken-down car…more than once.

A friend’s, a neighbor’s, some stranger’s in the middle of the highway. You ended up all sweaty and covered in grease/dirt, but with your new friends you had the satisfaction of having done your duty to help, which is simply part of our culture.

6. You still have nightmares about dying after mixing wine and watermelon.

How many times did they warn us about this deadly combination? Even today I make sure that wine and watermelon are never found on the same table. What’s the science, exactly, behind this folk wisdom?

7. You begin each statement with a long “Cheeee.”

“Che” is accompanied of course by whichever termination seems appropriate: the always effective “boludo/a” (or “asshole”) or the milder “¿viste?” (see?). And depending on context, you need the universally qualifying adjective “re.” So it’s like: “Cheeee, estoy re feliz. Me vi con Fulano el finde, ¿viste?”

8. It never occurred to you that sharing a mate was sharing germs with your friends.

Or maybe it did but you didn’t care. And you’d never (EVER) think of using your own mate in a group as if it were a coffee, as people do here in the US. Mate is for sharing.

More like this: 9 worst types of Argentine men


9. Friends are…

People we love. Even if we grow up punching each other. Even if we get pissed off about the littlest things. We always patch it up. We just eat dinner together and then like new we’re family again, because there’s no friend like an Argentine.

10. You’re born knowing that life is simple pleasures.

You cry easy and you laugh your ass off at whatever. You go from a furrowed brow (your default facial expression) to a huge smile without any filter. There’s always room for one more person at the table. There’s always a reason to make a toast, a joke, to discuss, to complain. You’re Argentine; you have an incomparable capacity to enjoy the simple things in life.

The post 10 signs you were born and raised in Argentina appeared first on Matador Network.

What Londoners say vs. what they mean

Photo: Chris JL

Londoners who live in London are a rare breed. In my office of 40, only two people were actually born and raised in the megacity of 8 million. Lucky for me, my partner and many of his friends are some of these scarce specimens. I thank them in advance for providing me with such robust material.

What they say: Excuse me.

What they mean: Get the f*** out of my way.

They’ve been politely trying to get around you on the sidewalk for 30 meters. When a Londoner stops silently seething you know you’ve really messed up.

What they say: That’s far.

What they mean: I can’t be bothered to go there.

It can also mean it’s outside of Zone 2.

What they say: London Salary.

What they mean: We pay you more to compensate for the fact that a pint costs twice as much as it should and you spend half your salary on rent.

You’ll also feel better about suffering four housemates in a three-bedroom house while your friend easily affords a huge flat in Birmingham.

What they say: You’re not from London.

What they mean: You grew up outside of Zone 3.

If you didn’t live in a borough that 1 in 3 Londoners (not entirely scientific) have heard of, you might as well be from Slough. Where’s Slough? Exactly.

What they say: It’s a proper pub.

What they mean: You don’t need a supplementary income to get pissed there.

They serve beer. And none of that craft brew shit, either.

What they say: I read in the Daily Mail…

What they mean: I’m a self-righteous, middle-England, right-wing, anti-immigrant, homophobic, misogynist, anti-intellectual, racist bastard.

I don’t think people from London like Daily Mail readers very much.

What they say: I read in the Guardian…

What they mean: I want you to know I’m not a self-righteous, middle-England, right-wing, anti-immigrant, homophobic, misogynist, anti-intellectual, racist bastard.

See above.

What they say: I read in the FT…

What they mean: I do, or will one day, own this country — if not the world.

Dry and unbiased fact, with a capitalist slant — there are powerful words in the Financial Times.

What they say: I’m on my way…. No, I’m not on the Tube yet.

What they mean: I’ll be there anywhere between 30 and 60 minutes after we agreed to meet.

Theoretically, they should be there on time. It’s just that Transport for London has other plans. A true Londoner knows of their lies but plans their arrival based on just the Tube journey anyway — ignoring the walk to the station, delays, and line changes.

What they say: How much is it?

What they mean: I would just like to confirm that I cannot afford this.

Because, you know, I’m still doing an internship and getting paid expenses.

What they say: Hipster.

What they mean: He wears tight trousers.

True Londoners remember when wearing baggy jeans, low and backwards, were all the rage. And they’re nostalgic for it.

What they say: I don’t go south of the river.

What they mean: That’s not London, there isn’t even a Tube stop.

Sorry, the Overground is not the Tube.

What they say: I don’t go north of the river.

What they mean: That’s where everything that’s wrong with London is happening.

Who needs trees? We’ve got Brixton Market.

What they say: I don’t go out in East London.

What they mean: I’ll have to take three night buses and walk for 20 minutes to get home if I go out in East London.

It’s also likely to involve getting vomit on my shoes.

What they say: I only go out in East London.

What they mean: I’m from East London.

And why go anywhere else?

What they say: This is London.

What they mean: Stop complaining.

In exchange for the exorbitant cost of living, meandering tourists, and transportation that gives you black snot, you get to live in the greatest city in the world.

The post What Londoners say vs. what they mean appeared first on Matador Network.

Why the media silence on Venezuela?

We’ve all heard about the uprisings and political mess that’s been occurring in Ukraine in recent weeks. We’ve also heard ad nauseum for about a month about how search parties haven’t been able to find the black box of an obviously crashed plane. What we haven’t heard much about — much to the shame of the Western media — is that uprisings have been occurring in Venezuela over the past couple months.

Henry Reich, the creator of the YouTube channel MinutePhysics, has become personally involved in the unrest because his illustrator, Ever Salazar, is living in Ciudad Guayana, Venezuela. Salazar has had to deal with the protests on a daily basis, and in this video he gives an excellent explanation of what it’s like to live in a country where “insanity has become normal.”

The post Yes, there’s a country other than Ukraine where things are getting out of control appeared first on Matador Network.

22 short films you should watch now

Short films are the Rodney Dangerfields of the movie world — they just can’t get any respect. That is to say that while shorts can be more or equally intellectually stimulating, aesthetically innovative, and emotionally complex as feature-length movies, they generally go ignored in the mainstream media.

Here’s a list of amazing, respect-deserving shorts that make the collective case against that stigma — and, best of all, each film is instantly streamable.

1. Six Shooter (2004, dir. Martin McDonagh)

Four years before his breakout feature, the genius 2008 In Bruges, Irish playwright and humorist Martin McDonagh won an Academy Award for his brutal first film, Six Shooter. Starring the incomparable Brendan Gleeson and even featuring Gleeson’s son, Domhnall, the short somehow makes closing your eyes and cringing while all hell breaks lose on a cross-country train seem fun rather than harrowing. A tricky feat only McDonagh’s wit could pull off.

2. Logorama (2010, dir. Francois Alaux, Herve de Crecy, & Ludovic Houplain)

The French filmmaking collective H5 made one of the funniest and most disturbing films of all time entirely out of animated brand logos. Featuring a murderous Ronald McDonald and a truly stupid Pringles Original policeman, Logorama manages to satirize capitalism, Hollywood, and the nature of mediocre art-cinema all at the same time. Not bad for 16 minutes.

3. The Dante Quartet (1987, dir. Stan Brakhage)

Speaking of hell, Stan Brakhage’s The Dante Quartet is a visualized rendition of just the place. Brakhage is widely considered the ‘grandfather of the avant-garde,’ and the overwhelming beauty of this six-minute paint-on-film short supports the nickname. Wise, sad, and complicated, the video thankfully concludes in paradise.

4. The Video Dating Tape of Desmondo Ray, Aged 33 and ¾ (2013, dir. Steve Baker)

How long does it usually take a film to make you cry? An hour? Thirty minutes? No heart is safe and no eyes leave unwatered in the span of this 2014 SXSW Film Festival hit, often referred to simply as Desmondo Ray, which runs three minutes and twenty-two seconds. Prepare the tissues!

5. Reindeer (also known as Reindeer Wrangling by Nowness, 2012, dir. Eva Weber)

The desolate landscape of Lapland is not one often seen in the Western mediascape. Can you recall the last time you saw footage from Scandinavia without either a volcano or Ben Stiller as Walter Mitty? I can, and I’m grateful that it was in Eva Weber’s 2012 short Reindeer, made for the Nowness group and nominated for the 2012 Short Film Grand Jury Prize at the Sundance Film Festival.

6. Werner Herzog Eats His Shoe (1980, dir. Les Blank)

Upon the passing away of famed documentarian Les Blank in 2013, my mind turned immediately to this singular and aptly titled film. We can hardly believe our eyes when Werner Herzog — who lost a bet with fellow master-filmmaker Errol Morris — literally eats his shoe, but even more surprising is that little beat your heart skips at the sight.

7. The New Tenants (2009, dir. Joachim Back)

Moving into a new apartment is a stressful journey in the first place, but you’ll be grateful for the mildness of your personal experiences when you see the 2009 Oscar-winning, darkly comic short above, written by Anders Thomas Jensen.

8. Two Cars, One Night (2004, dir. Taika Waititi)

The emergence of Maori filmmaker Taika Waititi onto the world comedy scene was abrupt and exciting when his short, Two Cars, One Night was nominated for an Academy Award in 2005. Waititi has since gone on to write and direct Eagle Vs. Shark, Flight of the Conchords, and the amazing 2010 feature Boy. What a start he had here.

9. Stalker Guilt Syndrome (1998, dir. Jonah Kaplan)

Ever wondered what the odd guy who’s following you from street to street is thinking? Jonah Kaplan and comedian Marc Maron developed an absurdist inner dialogue that captures the experience perfectly in this short.

10. While The Night Slept (2012, dir. Mitchell James O’Hearn)

This film and the one below represent two of the most impressive recent works by filmmakers who were still in school while making them. In this case, writer/director/editor Mitchell O’Hearn dredges up feelings of real grief and loss in less than seven minutes of screen time. It’s an abstract film, but a deeply powerful one. Click above to watch it on Vimeo.

11. Forever’s Gonna Start Tonight (2011, dir. Eliza Hittman)

The same could also be said of Eliza Hittman’s gorgeous 16mm Forever’s Gonna Start Tonight, the title of which comes from a classic Bonnie Tyler song you’ll be unable to get out of your head post-film. Hittman, who’s received significant acclaim for her award-winning 2013 indie It Felt Like Love, staked her claim on coming-of-age stories with this gorgeous short, an Official Selection of the 2011 Sundance Film Festival.

12. Nostalgia (1971, dir. Hollis Frampton)

Don’t be scared off by the director Hollis Frampton’s association with the American avant-garde cinema movement of the 1970s. Though Frampton is an experimental genius, his 1971 epic Nostalgia is comprehensible, simple, and extremely focused. Thirty-eight minutes of personal memorabilia burning might not sound riveting, but it’s a landmark commentary on material culture and the plague of nostalgia in American society.

13. The Meaning of Life (2005, dir. Don Hertzfeldt)

I won’t pretend to know what the meaning of life is, and you perhaps shouldn’t either. That isn’t because you don’t know — which you might — but because it’s unlikely you could ever animate a film on the subject as idiosyncratically or as virtuosically as Don Hertzfeldt did in his award-winning 2005 short.

14. Spiritualized – “Hey Jane” Official Video (2012, dir. A.G. Rojas)

The line between a ‘music video’ and ‘short film set to music’ is often a thin one, but it’s rarely been so blurry as in the first video for Brit pop band Spiritualized’s single, “Hey Jane.” I like the song very much, but it’s the incredible vision and final tracking shot set up by director A.G. Rojas that really tickles my personal fancy. Warning: NSFW, except for cinephiles.

15. What Do We Have In Our Pockets? (2013, dir. Goran Dukic)

Perhaps the best collage film ever made, Goran Dukic’s 2013 lark is a quaint little inner-city romance. Try too hard not to smile and you’ll have an aneurysm.

16. Meshes of the Afternoon (1943, dir. Maya Deren & Alexander Hammid)

No amount of Freudian psychoanalysis can truly penetrate (excuse the pun) this dream-like, intricate black-and-white masterpiece. Surreal, beguiling, and somehow disturbing, the 1943 short announced the arrival of multihyphenate experimental director Maya Deren to the American film industry.

17. The Snowman (1982, dir. Raymond Briggs)

Welcome your childhood back with this widely beloved masterpiece by the writer Raymond Briggs and director John Coates, a story of companionship and closeness between a young man and his snowy pal.

18. Hotel Chevalier (2007, dir. Wes Anderson)

Wes Anderson’s 2007 film The Darjeeling Limited came with a surprise iTunes-only companion film that’s since won arguably even more acclaim than the feature it accompanied. Featuring beautiful dialogue between Jason Schwartzman and a young, very nude Natalie Portman, Hotel Chevalier may be short as Anderson’s work goes, but it’s no career side note.

19. The Terrys (2011, dir. Tim Heidecker & Eric Wareheim)

I grant you that the comedy duo Tim & Eric are not for everyone. But when they hit the laughs, they hit them hard, as in their somewhat disgusting but uproarious story of two freakish weirdos who produce a ‘special’ kind of child. Gross-out genius.

20 and 21. Gregory Go Boom (2013, dir. Janicza Bravo) and Brazzaville Teen-Ager (2013, dir. Michael Cera)

The freshest of all the voices listed here, Janicza Bravo managed to nab some of the career-best performances from comedy stars Michael Cera, Sarah Burns, and Brett Gelman for this 2013 short film for the comedy website Jash. But Gregory Go Boom is best watched as a companion piece to Michael Cera’s short film Brazzaville Teen-Ager, which premiered a month before on the same website. Together, the films represent a massive step forward for Bravo and Cera, successfully demanding a reevaluation of any typecasting we might have forced on the actor.

22. Social Butterfly (2013, dir. Lauren Wolkstein)

A sensual mood, a meticulous eye, and a sharp performance from indie stalwart Anna Margaret Hollyman distinguish Lauren Wolkstein’s lovely 2013 short from several others with which it screened as a selection of the Sundance Film Festival. Keep your eye on Wolkstein — she was listed as one of the 25 Faces of Indie Film, and her most recent short as a producer, Jonathan’s Chest (dir. by Chris Radcliff and co-produced with Autumn Tarleton), is equally impressive.

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