Wade Kelly's Blog - Posts Tagged "writing"
Blogging
Hi.
I am back, attempting to write something half-way intelligent and interesting enough not to put you all to sleep.
It was suggested by a wonderful and insightful gal on GR that I should blog more than once a week. Hmmm... If I do, then what do I talk about? Although I like to talk, I don't often come up with interesting topics and when you have a conversation WITH someone, there are at least TWO people to come up with things to talk about. Not so with Blogging. It amazes me sometimes when I have time to read blogs and some bloggers can come up with interesting things to say all the time! Three and four times a day even!!! Astounding. Maybe I don't think that much?
(note: as I type this, I get a message that tells me to write about whatever comes to mind and be natural. Like she KNOWS I am writing about not knowing what to write about! creepy.)
What do I know about? I'd say writing, but that might come off arrogant. It's not like I have all that published and have won awards :s This is just the start of what I hope is a great and promising career. But I guess writing is what I know most and desire most so talking about would be natural.
I am working on a sequel. I had 87k written for months but lacked the time to finish it. PLUS, I was hoping to get feedback on When Love is Not Enough so that it would give me an idea if the direction I took the second book would be acceptable to the audience. So far, I have gotten some good ideas and I think I am taking the characters to a place that is not so far off that "fans" (lol, I write that like I have more than one.) would not scream at me for doing the things I do to the characters. In some ways I am very glad that I held off on finishing. I've come up with better ways to write it.
Like the first one, I am writing what I feel. I hope the readers can relate to some of it. I personally experienced many of the events contained in the pages so I hope it adds credibility and believability. If you've visited my website, you notice I claim to write about pain :p So, I have to think of ways to do that again. I have lots of pain in mind but I don't want it to be written in such a way to suspend the readers disbelief. (Is that the way you phrase it?) anyway... I hope readers can FEEL the pain and relate, maybe even cringe or yell at the book! lol My desire is to provoke readers to react. If you want a sappy, bland novel that you can read, cry about and put away, then I say go elsewhere. I want my stuff to stick with the reader for days. If I'm not doing this, let me know!!!
Pushing a reader--who is not in my head knowing what I am thinking while I write--to react and feel pain, anguish and anger, sadness and joy, makes me happy! It means I've written it well enough for you to FEEL it!
So... is this the "blogging" I need to be doing? Let me know what you think and maybe some things you'd like me to talk about?
Wade
xoxo
I am back, attempting to write something half-way intelligent and interesting enough not to put you all to sleep.
It was suggested by a wonderful and insightful gal on GR that I should blog more than once a week. Hmmm... If I do, then what do I talk about? Although I like to talk, I don't often come up with interesting topics and when you have a conversation WITH someone, there are at least TWO people to come up with things to talk about. Not so with Blogging. It amazes me sometimes when I have time to read blogs and some bloggers can come up with interesting things to say all the time! Three and four times a day even!!! Astounding. Maybe I don't think that much?
(note: as I type this, I get a message that tells me to write about whatever comes to mind and be natural. Like she KNOWS I am writing about not knowing what to write about! creepy.)
What do I know about? I'd say writing, but that might come off arrogant. It's not like I have all that published and have won awards :s This is just the start of what I hope is a great and promising career. But I guess writing is what I know most and desire most so talking about would be natural.
I am working on a sequel. I had 87k written for months but lacked the time to finish it. PLUS, I was hoping to get feedback on When Love is Not Enough so that it would give me an idea if the direction I took the second book would be acceptable to the audience. So far, I have gotten some good ideas and I think I am taking the characters to a place that is not so far off that "fans" (lol, I write that like I have more than one.) would not scream at me for doing the things I do to the characters. In some ways I am very glad that I held off on finishing. I've come up with better ways to write it.
Like the first one, I am writing what I feel. I hope the readers can relate to some of it. I personally experienced many of the events contained in the pages so I hope it adds credibility and believability. If you've visited my website, you notice I claim to write about pain :p So, I have to think of ways to do that again. I have lots of pain in mind but I don't want it to be written in such a way to suspend the readers disbelief. (Is that the way you phrase it?) anyway... I hope readers can FEEL the pain and relate, maybe even cringe or yell at the book! lol My desire is to provoke readers to react. If you want a sappy, bland novel that you can read, cry about and put away, then I say go elsewhere. I want my stuff to stick with the reader for days. If I'm not doing this, let me know!!!
Pushing a reader--who is not in my head knowing what I am thinking while I write--to react and feel pain, anguish and anger, sadness and joy, makes me happy! It means I've written it well enough for you to FEEL it!
So... is this the "blogging" I need to be doing? Let me know what you think and maybe some things you'd like me to talk about?
Wade
xoxo
learning grammar
Before I sit down with my daunting task of editing I decided to type a quick blog on some thoughts in my head. (It's always the thoughts in my head that I blog about.) I want to speak to all those out there who want to write and want to get published....
Learn grammar!
I was not a great English student in high school. I was better at math and science. English, not so much. Grammar, spelling, punctuation, conjugation, vocabulary, etc.... Everything was difficult. My advice to those who aspire to be authors, learn while you can! Learn in high school! Learning AFTER you graduate is so much harder. I really should take a class but I am too lazy. Also I lack the time. Another point to consider for those who are younger than me and considering a career in writing--when you graduate from HS, it is difficult to MAKE time to learn the skills of writing. When you are in a class (and yes, you can take a class in college if you have the time and money around a work schedule.) you are forced to learn what the teacher is teaching. Classes have structure. Classes have someone to TELL you what you are doing wrong. AND/OR explain what it is you are doing correct that could stand improvement.
I am learning on the fly. Not easy! I go by the Chicago Manual of Style. 16th edition. Dreamspinner recommends the CMS because they follow that so I thought to get on board with the same "rule book" but it is hard to learn new tricks. For one, I don't always understand what the book is talking about. They have examples, but sometimes my sentence is different and I can't find where the "rule" IS, and therefore I have no idea if I am doing it correctly. THIS is why editing takes so long. WLINE was rejected over grammatical (and plot-wise) errors. I had a hard time fixing things because as we have all heard, I am not so good with the grammar! I am very determined to have a clean MS (or as close as I can get) for this next submission.
As I go, I find lots of errors. I THOUGHT it was done, but find I am so wrong. What I am doing now is making and outline (of sorts) by chapter and writing down details of events in each chapter. AND highlighting where I need to check a "rule" in the CMS so I can see if the sentence needs fixing. In this, I can see where I have redundancies in the plot, and where references occur, and if I need to add any tidbits to tie in an event that happens somewhere else in the book. No one likes surprises that scream WHAT?!? Hints are always best, even if very subtle.
Just yesterday I found inconsistencies! Not good! This is a sequel after all. I noticed that in WLINE I named a few characters in the fire department. Well, Matt hangs out there and yet I had different names in this one. So I fixed that. Plus, I totally forgot what Jason's last name was! (duh!) Jason is Matt's friend and I can't have his character inconsistent.
Taking notes is the way to go.
A short while back, before DSP picked up WLINE for publication, I hired a professional editor. She was working with me on another novel I wrote. As we sat down to discuss how she could help me, she pulled out some notes she had taken to talk about where my troubles lie. Then she asked about some specifics in the novel and I pulled out my notebook. (Complete with charts, character outlines, scene references, ages, dates, etc.) When she looked at the extent of what I had before her she said--and this is BEFORE I was published--she said, "You are not a writer. You are an author!" I will never forget that. Her point was that I don't simply "write" a story, I am IN the story. I have detailed the characters and shaped them so much so that items are documented for future reference. I have created something complex and not so easily sketched if I don't have my ducks in a row and refer back to the dates and details. (does that make sense?)
Now, don't get me wrong. I am not saying I am the BEST author in the world. I have a long way to go to learn the rules of grammar and how to shape a story without inconsistencies and errors. I KNOW I need improvement. But what was encouraging to me was that editor's distinction between simply "writing" and being an author. I think authors feel it in their bones. The characters become real. The characters are alive in my mind and on my heart. To me they are almost tangible.
>Side note: the other "novel" I wrote is on the back-burner. I know some of you would be asking me what is it about? Are you going to publish it? etc... It is a complicated plot and needs major edits to become publishable. (hence the "back-burner") What I DID learn from that one was my tendency toward passive voice. One of my struggles!
so, with that all said, be patient with me. I am learning. I WISH I had learned the first time around when I was in school and had the time. Being an adult is over-rated. Having to WORK to pay for a car, and insurance, and food, and a place to live, tends to get in the way of all the things in life you WANT to do. I WANT to write full-time! Yeah, that is not happening yet! fingers crossed I'll get there :)
Thanks for stopping by!
Wade
xoxx
and go vote: http://www.goodreads.com/poll/show/55...
Learn grammar!
I was not a great English student in high school. I was better at math and science. English, not so much. Grammar, spelling, punctuation, conjugation, vocabulary, etc.... Everything was difficult. My advice to those who aspire to be authors, learn while you can! Learn in high school! Learning AFTER you graduate is so much harder. I really should take a class but I am too lazy. Also I lack the time. Another point to consider for those who are younger than me and considering a career in writing--when you graduate from HS, it is difficult to MAKE time to learn the skills of writing. When you are in a class (and yes, you can take a class in college if you have the time and money around a work schedule.) you are forced to learn what the teacher is teaching. Classes have structure. Classes have someone to TELL you what you are doing wrong. AND/OR explain what it is you are doing correct that could stand improvement.
I am learning on the fly. Not easy! I go by the Chicago Manual of Style. 16th edition. Dreamspinner recommends the CMS because they follow that so I thought to get on board with the same "rule book" but it is hard to learn new tricks. For one, I don't always understand what the book is talking about. They have examples, but sometimes my sentence is different and I can't find where the "rule" IS, and therefore I have no idea if I am doing it correctly. THIS is why editing takes so long. WLINE was rejected over grammatical (and plot-wise) errors. I had a hard time fixing things because as we have all heard, I am not so good with the grammar! I am very determined to have a clean MS (or as close as I can get) for this next submission.
As I go, I find lots of errors. I THOUGHT it was done, but find I am so wrong. What I am doing now is making and outline (of sorts) by chapter and writing down details of events in each chapter. AND highlighting where I need to check a "rule" in the CMS so I can see if the sentence needs fixing. In this, I can see where I have redundancies in the plot, and where references occur, and if I need to add any tidbits to tie in an event that happens somewhere else in the book. No one likes surprises that scream WHAT?!? Hints are always best, even if very subtle.
Just yesterday I found inconsistencies! Not good! This is a sequel after all. I noticed that in WLINE I named a few characters in the fire department. Well, Matt hangs out there and yet I had different names in this one. So I fixed that. Plus, I totally forgot what Jason's last name was! (duh!) Jason is Matt's friend and I can't have his character inconsistent.
Taking notes is the way to go.
A short while back, before DSP picked up WLINE for publication, I hired a professional editor. She was working with me on another novel I wrote. As we sat down to discuss how she could help me, she pulled out some notes she had taken to talk about where my troubles lie. Then she asked about some specifics in the novel and I pulled out my notebook. (Complete with charts, character outlines, scene references, ages, dates, etc.) When she looked at the extent of what I had before her she said--and this is BEFORE I was published--she said, "You are not a writer. You are an author!" I will never forget that. Her point was that I don't simply "write" a story, I am IN the story. I have detailed the characters and shaped them so much so that items are documented for future reference. I have created something complex and not so easily sketched if I don't have my ducks in a row and refer back to the dates and details. (does that make sense?)
Now, don't get me wrong. I am not saying I am the BEST author in the world. I have a long way to go to learn the rules of grammar and how to shape a story without inconsistencies and errors. I KNOW I need improvement. But what was encouraging to me was that editor's distinction between simply "writing" and being an author. I think authors feel it in their bones. The characters become real. The characters are alive in my mind and on my heart. To me they are almost tangible.
>Side note: the other "novel" I wrote is on the back-burner. I know some of you would be asking me what is it about? Are you going to publish it? etc... It is a complicated plot and needs major edits to become publishable. (hence the "back-burner") What I DID learn from that one was my tendency toward passive voice. One of my struggles!
so, with that all said, be patient with me. I am learning. I WISH I had learned the first time around when I was in school and had the time. Being an adult is over-rated. Having to WORK to pay for a car, and insurance, and food, and a place to live, tends to get in the way of all the things in life you WANT to do. I WANT to write full-time! Yeah, that is not happening yet! fingers crossed I'll get there :)
Thanks for stopping by!
Wade
xoxx
and go vote: http://www.goodreads.com/poll/show/55...
Forest Fires
How do forest fires start?
Obvious answers:
1. Lightning Strike
2. Volcanic Eruption
3. Cigarette butt
4. Camp fire
I looked at what wikipedia had to say and it is basically one of two possibilities: Natural causes, or man made. Forest fires can ignite and take off like "wild fire" or they can be a slow, smoldering burn that once it "catches" it then whips through the underbrush like crazy. I'd like to think of When Love Is Not Enough as a slow, smoldering ember left in an abandoned camp sight after a long, steady rain.
The book is that last chunk of charcoal that just wouldn't go out. The fire is still in there, but it needs something to make it catch.
My story (in many ways personal) was inside of me like an ember. It burned. It smoked. It needed to be told. I "fanned" it enough to give it life. (ie. I wrote it and had it published.) Now, it's smoldering. My little ol' novel... the one that: (1) is "filled with pain, anger and deep, raw emotional upset." (2) has "so much true, raw emotional turmoil as to make my heart physically hurt for the characters." (3) is "definitely not a typical love story... Wade's characters are well conceptualized and his style of writing is solid. ... If you appreciate a story that challenges you to think harder and feel deeper, one that leaves your mind buzzing even after you've closed the cover, then you'll appreciate this story. (4) is"messy, chaotic and so profoundly real that you are compelled to keep reading. etc." and (5) is a "tale of love and hope in the face of pain and loss and tragedy. etc..."
How does it "catch" and spread like wildfire in the underbrush?
Perhaps it is similar to the coals in the campfire surrounded by wet brush after a rain. When Love Is Not Enough is sitting amidst the wet leaves waiting it's time to burst with life. My readers are the oxygen filled winds flowing over the coals. The more the billows blow, the stronger the ember glows.
I am only one person. And lets face it, publishers-no matter how good they are-can not promote a book for a long period of time because they have way more books than time. So it is left to the author. Again I say I am one person. I can not do this alone. I learned, not long ago, that I need to ask for help when I need it. This is not a natural tendency. Human nature strives to do things on our own. I am admitting I can't. I NEED YOU!!! All you wonderful readers out there that "fan the flame" and help spread word of my book like wildfire. You can do that by "recommending" it. I am just starting to do that myself with the goodreads "recommend a book" button. (funny how it doesn't let me recommend my own!)
So, little oxygen molecules that you are, breath life and fire into my novel! Please :) recommend it to friends. Recommend it on "polls", recommend it in discussion groups. Anywhere. Everywhere.
Another thing that I lack that other "wildfire" authors have is prolificacy. I have not cranked out book after book in the last six months since I've been published. (Sorry.) I wrote and polished ONE. (Currently in submission.) Now I am writing another. I have another started. I am trying! If I could crank out the words and have them lined up, that might be like adding gasoline to my campfire embers. But I was all out of gas. I am getting fueled up now. I'm on "fire" for this next novel that I am working on, but I need you to keep
When Love Is Not Enough alive while I continue to write Cole For Christmas, and I wait to hear about The Cost of Loving. Can you help me? Will you?
I know I have a "fan club" and I am super, super grateful for those who continually cheer me on. Being a new author is tough. Getting a name out there is hard! It takes perseverance and skill and some luck. (Not so sure about my skills part.) I am plugging away, but I need to have others fan my flame so it doesn't go out while I'm away from the campsite. (If you know what I mean?)
Now, I gotta go get some writing done so I can keep up with my goal of 10k a week!! So far, it's looking good!
Be good. And keep reading.
Wade
PS: If someone read this blog and doesn't believe I'm a writer, then something is wrong with them. Only a writer (or artist) with a wild imagination can write something as flowery and "symbolic" as this and get away with it ;) Artists! We just have to go with it!
Obvious answers:
1. Lightning Strike
2. Volcanic Eruption
3. Cigarette butt
4. Camp fire
I looked at what wikipedia had to say and it is basically one of two possibilities: Natural causes, or man made. Forest fires can ignite and take off like "wild fire" or they can be a slow, smoldering burn that once it "catches" it then whips through the underbrush like crazy. I'd like to think of When Love Is Not Enough as a slow, smoldering ember left in an abandoned camp sight after a long, steady rain.
The book is that last chunk of charcoal that just wouldn't go out. The fire is still in there, but it needs something to make it catch.
My story (in many ways personal) was inside of me like an ember. It burned. It smoked. It needed to be told. I "fanned" it enough to give it life. (ie. I wrote it and had it published.) Now, it's smoldering. My little ol' novel... the one that: (1) is "filled with pain, anger and deep, raw emotional upset." (2) has "so much true, raw emotional turmoil as to make my heart physically hurt for the characters." (3) is "definitely not a typical love story... Wade's characters are well conceptualized and his style of writing is solid. ... If you appreciate a story that challenges you to think harder and feel deeper, one that leaves your mind buzzing even after you've closed the cover, then you'll appreciate this story. (4) is"messy, chaotic and so profoundly real that you are compelled to keep reading. etc." and (5) is a "tale of love and hope in the face of pain and loss and tragedy. etc..."
How does it "catch" and spread like wildfire in the underbrush?
Perhaps it is similar to the coals in the campfire surrounded by wet brush after a rain. When Love Is Not Enough is sitting amidst the wet leaves waiting it's time to burst with life. My readers are the oxygen filled winds flowing over the coals. The more the billows blow, the stronger the ember glows.
I am only one person. And lets face it, publishers-no matter how good they are-can not promote a book for a long period of time because they have way more books than time. So it is left to the author. Again I say I am one person. I can not do this alone. I learned, not long ago, that I need to ask for help when I need it. This is not a natural tendency. Human nature strives to do things on our own. I am admitting I can't. I NEED YOU!!! All you wonderful readers out there that "fan the flame" and help spread word of my book like wildfire. You can do that by "recommending" it. I am just starting to do that myself with the goodreads "recommend a book" button. (funny how it doesn't let me recommend my own!)
So, little oxygen molecules that you are, breath life and fire into my novel! Please :) recommend it to friends. Recommend it on "polls", recommend it in discussion groups. Anywhere. Everywhere.
Another thing that I lack that other "wildfire" authors have is prolificacy. I have not cranked out book after book in the last six months since I've been published. (Sorry.) I wrote and polished ONE. (Currently in submission.) Now I am writing another. I have another started. I am trying! If I could crank out the words and have them lined up, that might be like adding gasoline to my campfire embers. But I was all out of gas. I am getting fueled up now. I'm on "fire" for this next novel that I am working on, but I need you to keep
When Love Is Not Enough alive while I continue to write Cole For Christmas, and I wait to hear about The Cost of Loving. Can you help me? Will you?
I know I have a "fan club" and I am super, super grateful for those who continually cheer me on. Being a new author is tough. Getting a name out there is hard! It takes perseverance and skill and some luck. (Not so sure about my skills part.) I am plugging away, but I need to have others fan my flame so it doesn't go out while I'm away from the campsite. (If you know what I mean?)
Now, I gotta go get some writing done so I can keep up with my goal of 10k a week!! So far, it's looking good!
Be good. And keep reading.
Wade
PS: If someone read this blog and doesn't believe I'm a writer, then something is wrong with them. Only a writer (or artist) with a wild imagination can write something as flowery and "symbolic" as this and get away with it ;) Artists! We just have to go with it!
Living in the Shadows
Have you ever heard of the expression "living in the shadow of _____" (fill in: my big brother, my successful sister, my ____) The phrase equates to having to live up to something but it's often in our minds. The older brother MAY be awesome at everything but as a younger sibling it doesn't mean that you are less special or less successful. Only DIFFERENTLY successful. IN theory anyway, in practice we hole onto an inferiority complex and mope around claiming to be inept. This phrase comes to mind when thinking about When Love Is Not Enough
Is this going to be the "older sibling" for all the other books to look up to and feel inadequate? It feels like this while I'm writing.
If you read my blogs, you know I am a praise junkie. I NEED affirmation, and I always feel down about my writing. Nothing different in this blog. Turn back now! (lol) I got another review yesterday. Actually I got a few recently. One from Summer Michaels over at Summer's Point Blogspot and yesterday's was from HEARTS ON FIRE Reviews
Don from HEARTS ON FIRE said, and I quote, "This book was absolutely amazing. ... (long review in the middle here) ...This has become one of my favorite books of all time and I’s give it 6 hearts if I was allowed. I could go on for pages praising this book but just pick it up for yourself and experience it."
Totally rocking, right?
But then I go back to writing and think, gee, is anything else I write going to be that amazing? I honestly don't know. When Love Is Not Enough was written out of personal pain. I was in a dark place and the pain poured onto the pages easily. I'm not there anymore. I'm feeling good. Praises like Don's only add to the happy so where does that leave my writing? I don't know and that scares me.
I guess part of my apprehension is over the big "question mark" of the sequel. Will it be accepted? Will it not? Will the religious content irk the publisher? Will I have to re-vamp the plot? It is just monstrously LONG and I'll have to cut several scenes? (which, btw, if I "cut" scenes, I would totally make them a free read on my website.) So I sit here and worry over TCOL -The Cost of Loving- for no good reason really. It's just my personality. I worry. I get anxious. Then I second guess.
I'm also second guessing my latest project. Cole for Christmas. ( I WILL be changing the name but I don't know what to?) At 40,488 words, this W.I.P (work in progress) is coming along nicely. At this point, I don't see it hitting 75k. The plot moves along to quickly. Probably closer to 65k (if that). I am not really paying attention to word count as much as were the plot is going. I feel if I watch the words, I might stick something into the story just to stretch it and I don't know that it would make it any better. Stories shouldn't be stretched, they should flow. Easily. I am trying hard to allow the story it's own direction. Like I have mentioned before, it's a "fun" story. I edited it on Thursday. At the time it had 37k and after going over 37,000 words I only added 200. That was amazing for me. Normally I end up adding and adding and the thing becomes a bear because I can't stop adding words. (Editing is designed to shave them. Perfect them.) This run through I felt very confident in the way it was already written. And I laughed often! This was seriously cracking me up. Then the worrier speaks into my subconscious that it will only be funny to me, and to no one else. So, maybe this book I am only writing for me and I have to think "if no on else likes it, fine!"
Easy to say, hard to do.
I worry. So, apologies ahead of time if I suck at being funny. I've been writing "dark" so long (two years) that I often wonder if I forgot how to laugh. Life is good right now. I feel good. Writing Cole is good. So for all you readers and reviewers, I really hope I do not disappoint when something else I've written gets published. Hearing "This has become one of my favorite books of all time" is truly thrilling, yet it scares me that that is what I have to live up to. First shot out of the gate is "absolutely amazing" and worthy of 6 stars in Don's mind. I take a deep breath and think, "the next one will be seen as notably adequate but nothing special in light of it's older brother."
It would almost be easier to start with a book that sucked, because then I can only get better, right?
Okay, I'm done with the self-flagellation.
over and out. I gotta write some more. :)
Wade
Is this going to be the "older sibling" for all the other books to look up to and feel inadequate? It feels like this while I'm writing.
If you read my blogs, you know I am a praise junkie. I NEED affirmation, and I always feel down about my writing. Nothing different in this blog. Turn back now! (lol) I got another review yesterday. Actually I got a few recently. One from Summer Michaels over at Summer's Point Blogspot and yesterday's was from HEARTS ON FIRE Reviews
Don from HEARTS ON FIRE said, and I quote, "This book was absolutely amazing. ... (long review in the middle here) ...This has become one of my favorite books of all time and I’s give it 6 hearts if I was allowed. I could go on for pages praising this book but just pick it up for yourself and experience it."
Totally rocking, right?
But then I go back to writing and think, gee, is anything else I write going to be that amazing? I honestly don't know. When Love Is Not Enough was written out of personal pain. I was in a dark place and the pain poured onto the pages easily. I'm not there anymore. I'm feeling good. Praises like Don's only add to the happy so where does that leave my writing? I don't know and that scares me.
I guess part of my apprehension is over the big "question mark" of the sequel. Will it be accepted? Will it not? Will the religious content irk the publisher? Will I have to re-vamp the plot? It is just monstrously LONG and I'll have to cut several scenes? (which, btw, if I "cut" scenes, I would totally make them a free read on my website.) So I sit here and worry over TCOL -The Cost of Loving- for no good reason really. It's just my personality. I worry. I get anxious. Then I second guess.
I'm also second guessing my latest project. Cole for Christmas. ( I WILL be changing the name but I don't know what to?) At 40,488 words, this W.I.P (work in progress) is coming along nicely. At this point, I don't see it hitting 75k. The plot moves along to quickly. Probably closer to 65k (if that). I am not really paying attention to word count as much as were the plot is going. I feel if I watch the words, I might stick something into the story just to stretch it and I don't know that it would make it any better. Stories shouldn't be stretched, they should flow. Easily. I am trying hard to allow the story it's own direction. Like I have mentioned before, it's a "fun" story. I edited it on Thursday. At the time it had 37k and after going over 37,000 words I only added 200. That was amazing for me. Normally I end up adding and adding and the thing becomes a bear because I can't stop adding words. (Editing is designed to shave them. Perfect them.) This run through I felt very confident in the way it was already written. And I laughed often! This was seriously cracking me up. Then the worrier speaks into my subconscious that it will only be funny to me, and to no one else. So, maybe this book I am only writing for me and I have to think "if no on else likes it, fine!"
Easy to say, hard to do.
I worry. So, apologies ahead of time if I suck at being funny. I've been writing "dark" so long (two years) that I often wonder if I forgot how to laugh. Life is good right now. I feel good. Writing Cole is good. So for all you readers and reviewers, I really hope I do not disappoint when something else I've written gets published. Hearing "This has become one of my favorite books of all time" is truly thrilling, yet it scares me that that is what I have to live up to. First shot out of the gate is "absolutely amazing" and worthy of 6 stars in Don's mind. I take a deep breath and think, "the next one will be seen as notably adequate but nothing special in light of it's older brother."
It would almost be easier to start with a book that sucked, because then I can only get better, right?
Okay, I'm done with the self-flagellation.
over and out. I gotta write some more. :)
Wade
Um, hmmm... What THAT guy said!
Hi,
There really isn't a better way to express things sometimes than to restate what someone else says, especially when it comes out so eloquently. Some of you know I have been writing a sequel to When Love Is Not Enough. It is called The Cost of Loving. It is Matt's story and picks up right where WLINE leaves off. It is 121,000 words. It is emotionally charged and will more than likely cause readers to scream at the pages and/or cry. It also has a heavy "religious" content as Matt is the Christian character and he came out AT CHURCH in the end of WLINE. (sorry for the "spoiler").
That said, it has ALSO been rejected twice by publishers.
I will restate what KADE said as I think it captures what many of the "fans" out there feel: "WADE! I'm so sorry! I've been dying for the sequel! Shame they'll take something as fuck-shit horrible as some of the things I've spent wayyyy too much money on to be fuck-shit horrible but they'll keep you from dropping an ANTICIPATED sequel on us. Shit... self publish, dude. I'll pay up for a crappy mobi file you converted yourself just to read Darian and Matt's story. Keep your head up! You are brilliant!"
...you can read if for yourself on the last BLOG. in the comments section.
Oh, Kade. What you say is true in many ways. I HAVE read things where I was disgruntled over spending my money on them. AND I have known (and know) authors who have written fabulous novels and can not seem to get them published! I have been thinking about my latest disappointment.
I am pretty sure I have stated I am a Christian and I do try to see things as a part of God's plan. So, that in mind, I am trying to figure out why this latest roadblock as been placed there? Kade calls me brilliant! :) Very kind but I am not sure I would go that far. Let us go on that assumption for now and NOT simply assume my MS for TCOL was complete crap. If it was a good story and halfway decently written, then why reject it? Could it be that since it is a second novel or a series that money does matter? After all WLINE is not a NY Best Seller -- it has a slow burn like I have said several times. Maybe taking on this second novel as the FIRST publication of mine for a new publisher doesn't seem cost effective? (Remember this is also 121k--long for a publisher.) They may already see it as a low seller. Option number two: The religious content is too strong. I am kind-of leaning that way. Although I did my best to make it character related and represent the bible stuff in such a way to show the driving force in the character's struggle with the church, it COULD be seen as too much.
What to do?
I have chosen to give the MS to two different people to get their feedback. These two readers are different in background and I hope will give a balanced over view.
In the meantime, I am still writing. I am 3/4 done my newest MS. I think I like the title "My Roommate's a Jock? Well, Crap!" I am 85% convinced I should go with that. It fits the book. Perhaps if I finish something more "mainstream" and that one is received better by the public, than my other MS will not appear so scary to accept. (For publishers) And I don't even know if a re-submission would be accepted, but maybe if more of my novels sell, then I may broach that question. YES, self-pub IS an option. I think I will try one more submission to a normal publishing company first. Going with the "three strikes you're out" policy I may then consider self-pub.
Once my "Beta" readers finnish the MS and let me know their apprehensions and niggles, I will have a better grasp on what doesn't fly and I hope to rewrite TCOL so that the readers will LOVE it, not just think it is "okay". So look at it this way, there is a big delay to read the sequel, but once it is out there, it will be the best it can be! Plus, I really think I need to write book three and have that one ready for release around the same timeframe. So, since book three is not finished, there will be a wait to read more about Matt and Darian. Sorry. Can't be helped.
Readers and fans, keep you're chins up too! Don't give up on me. I am doing the best I can to deliver a polished and emotionally driven novel to you!
Wade
xoxo
There really isn't a better way to express things sometimes than to restate what someone else says, especially when it comes out so eloquently. Some of you know I have been writing a sequel to When Love Is Not Enough. It is called The Cost of Loving. It is Matt's story and picks up right where WLINE leaves off. It is 121,000 words. It is emotionally charged and will more than likely cause readers to scream at the pages and/or cry. It also has a heavy "religious" content as Matt is the Christian character and he came out AT CHURCH in the end of WLINE. (sorry for the "spoiler").
That said, it has ALSO been rejected twice by publishers.
I will restate what KADE said as I think it captures what many of the "fans" out there feel: "WADE! I'm so sorry! I've been dying for the sequel! Shame they'll take something as fuck-shit horrible as some of the things I've spent wayyyy too much money on to be fuck-shit horrible but they'll keep you from dropping an ANTICIPATED sequel on us. Shit... self publish, dude. I'll pay up for a crappy mobi file you converted yourself just to read Darian and Matt's story. Keep your head up! You are brilliant!"
...you can read if for yourself on the last BLOG. in the comments section.
Oh, Kade. What you say is true in many ways. I HAVE read things where I was disgruntled over spending my money on them. AND I have known (and know) authors who have written fabulous novels and can not seem to get them published! I have been thinking about my latest disappointment.
I am pretty sure I have stated I am a Christian and I do try to see things as a part of God's plan. So, that in mind, I am trying to figure out why this latest roadblock as been placed there? Kade calls me brilliant! :) Very kind but I am not sure I would go that far. Let us go on that assumption for now and NOT simply assume my MS for TCOL was complete crap. If it was a good story and halfway decently written, then why reject it? Could it be that since it is a second novel or a series that money does matter? After all WLINE is not a NY Best Seller -- it has a slow burn like I have said several times. Maybe taking on this second novel as the FIRST publication of mine for a new publisher doesn't seem cost effective? (Remember this is also 121k--long for a publisher.) They may already see it as a low seller. Option number two: The religious content is too strong. I am kind-of leaning that way. Although I did my best to make it character related and represent the bible stuff in such a way to show the driving force in the character's struggle with the church, it COULD be seen as too much.
What to do?
I have chosen to give the MS to two different people to get their feedback. These two readers are different in background and I hope will give a balanced over view.
In the meantime, I am still writing. I am 3/4 done my newest MS. I think I like the title "My Roommate's a Jock? Well, Crap!" I am 85% convinced I should go with that. It fits the book. Perhaps if I finish something more "mainstream" and that one is received better by the public, than my other MS will not appear so scary to accept. (For publishers) And I don't even know if a re-submission would be accepted, but maybe if more of my novels sell, then I may broach that question. YES, self-pub IS an option. I think I will try one more submission to a normal publishing company first. Going with the "three strikes you're out" policy I may then consider self-pub.
Once my "Beta" readers finnish the MS and let me know their apprehensions and niggles, I will have a better grasp on what doesn't fly and I hope to rewrite TCOL so that the readers will LOVE it, not just think it is "okay". So look at it this way, there is a big delay to read the sequel, but once it is out there, it will be the best it can be! Plus, I really think I need to write book three and have that one ready for release around the same timeframe. So, since book three is not finished, there will be a wait to read more about Matt and Darian. Sorry. Can't be helped.
Readers and fans, keep you're chins up too! Don't give up on me. I am doing the best I can to deliver a polished and emotionally driven novel to you!
Wade
xoxo
Silence
I don't know about any of you, but sometimes I need silence. Like the hustle-bustle of life can get so crazy that I can't hear myself think. Being a writer it is kind-of essential to think. Everything, literally, is in my head! Yesterday, I shut off. There wasn't anything going on. It was actually very depressing by the end of the day. I felt very blah. I felt drained and I felt cold, and I wasn't motivated to write anything although I had some time to. It was aggravating in some sense because sometimes there is so little time to write so when I had a chance, my mind wasn't working.
Then... I went to bed. Right before falling asleep a story-line hit me. Then I dream it, and wake up to it. And oh my gosh, it is dominating my thoughts! How am I supposed to finish my current WIP if this new one will not leave me alone? GRRR. I have to take time out now to write down the details so I won't forget them! Sorry, no details. I get paranoid every once in a while about people stealing my ideas if I share them too soon. One thing, is that it might be YA. I only say that because the age of the characters is young. (High School age.) So very little sex and more about the story is what might happen. There is also a strong girl character. That should be interesting. I've not written a strong "girl" part in too many of my tales. We'll see how it all turns out. No title in mind either.
on the WIP, and TCOL... not much to tell yet. I think the biggest problem with TCOL is that it is too long. I need to cut words, sentences, &/or scenes. Should not be too hard, but it might take TIME as I need to go through it carefully. I hope to get to that by the end of the month.
WIP... We are calling it MRJWC. (My Roommates a Jock? Well, Crap!) I have about 68k with a chapter or two to write. I have a "tentative" Beta reader. (I only say tentative because this is the first we have worked together and she hasn't read my stuff before.) I am taking it slow and hoping our working relationship will go well. So far I've sent a few chapters to get a feel for her thoughts and criticism. So far, she has pointed out some flaws that I COMPLETELY missed when writing it. ahhhh. *sigh*. As frustrating as it is to see flaws in CHAPTER 2!!! (beginning of the book, mind you.) It is also very good to see that she is a "thinking" person. (Not that I am insinuating ANYTHING about people in general NOT thinking.) But I am saying it to say that she was not just simply saying, "Oh, I like it!" blah, blah, without anything constructive so as to not hurt my feelings right off. She was blunt and pointed out the flaw!
So, thank you, dear BETA reader! :)
I need to see the flaws. That is the purpose of a beta reader. So, with the one major flaw in chapter 2, I started thinking about other conflicts. I have three characters that are basically the same. WHY? You ask. Because I'm an idiot. I about 7 major characters in MRJWC. (two MCs and 5 others that play a major part in it.) Of the other 5 side characters, I found that I put the same personality traits in 3. This is so dumb. So, now I have to alter them. I think this is partially why my brian shut down the other day. It is daunting sometimes to think that I have to edit through 68k and rethink the actions and dialogue of the characters so they don't repeat each other.
Plus, I have POV shifts that I want to make sense and not confuse people when you all read them. (I know how some readers have POV shifts.) I also have some flashbacks that were confusing to the Beta. I need to fix those too! So, today, besides my day job, I need to think clearly and jump at my tasks with enthusiasm, not dread.
My conclusion .... being a writer is very difficult. Getting off the ground is very difficult. Not getting discouraged is very difficult. Why do I do it? I guess I like to torture myself. Is a masochist the one who gets off from pain? Maybe that's me.
Then... I went to bed. Right before falling asleep a story-line hit me. Then I dream it, and wake up to it. And oh my gosh, it is dominating my thoughts! How am I supposed to finish my current WIP if this new one will not leave me alone? GRRR. I have to take time out now to write down the details so I won't forget them! Sorry, no details. I get paranoid every once in a while about people stealing my ideas if I share them too soon. One thing, is that it might be YA. I only say that because the age of the characters is young. (High School age.) So very little sex and more about the story is what might happen. There is also a strong girl character. That should be interesting. I've not written a strong "girl" part in too many of my tales. We'll see how it all turns out. No title in mind either.
on the WIP, and TCOL... not much to tell yet. I think the biggest problem with TCOL is that it is too long. I need to cut words, sentences, &/or scenes. Should not be too hard, but it might take TIME as I need to go through it carefully. I hope to get to that by the end of the month.
WIP... We are calling it MRJWC. (My Roommates a Jock? Well, Crap!) I have about 68k with a chapter or two to write. I have a "tentative" Beta reader. (I only say tentative because this is the first we have worked together and she hasn't read my stuff before.) I am taking it slow and hoping our working relationship will go well. So far I've sent a few chapters to get a feel for her thoughts and criticism. So far, she has pointed out some flaws that I COMPLETELY missed when writing it. ahhhh. *sigh*. As frustrating as it is to see flaws in CHAPTER 2!!! (beginning of the book, mind you.) It is also very good to see that she is a "thinking" person. (Not that I am insinuating ANYTHING about people in general NOT thinking.) But I am saying it to say that she was not just simply saying, "Oh, I like it!" blah, blah, without anything constructive so as to not hurt my feelings right off. She was blunt and pointed out the flaw!
So, thank you, dear BETA reader! :)
I need to see the flaws. That is the purpose of a beta reader. So, with the one major flaw in chapter 2, I started thinking about other conflicts. I have three characters that are basically the same. WHY? You ask. Because I'm an idiot. I about 7 major characters in MRJWC. (two MCs and 5 others that play a major part in it.) Of the other 5 side characters, I found that I put the same personality traits in 3. This is so dumb. So, now I have to alter them. I think this is partially why my brian shut down the other day. It is daunting sometimes to think that I have to edit through 68k and rethink the actions and dialogue of the characters so they don't repeat each other.
Plus, I have POV shifts that I want to make sense and not confuse people when you all read them. (I know how some readers have POV shifts.) I also have some flashbacks that were confusing to the Beta. I need to fix those too! So, today, besides my day job, I need to think clearly and jump at my tasks with enthusiasm, not dread.
My conclusion .... being a writer is very difficult. Getting off the ground is very difficult. Not getting discouraged is very difficult. Why do I do it? I guess I like to torture myself. Is a masochist the one who gets off from pain? Maybe that's me.
Editing and Writing Go Hand-in-Hand
Hi,
I don't have a whole heck of a lot to say. I've been writing. I would skip a blog all together but then people start to worry about me and post comments like "How ya doin' Wade?" and "Hope everything is okay with you." Not that comments are bad. I'm not saying that. I just don't want people to worry.
I'm fine.
I've been writing and editing. I normally edit as I go unless inspired to write long passages. Writers are often asked how they edit? A lot of the time I write, and then the next day I reread and change things. If I haven't written anything for a long spell on a particular project then I will read it, typically from the beginning, to get in the zone. I often read several chapters ahead of where my characters are so when I get to the end of the passage I am able to think of the next scene. Sometimes, if I am not at my computer, I will think about different parts I read recently and think of details to add. Even if it is one or two sentences it can add a lot to the understanding of how a character thinks and what they are doing.
In "My Roommate's A Jock? Well Crap!" (MRJWC) I have loads of characters that I have truly come to love. I developed a side character that I think is my favorite. Rob McAvoy. He is funny. (I think.) I used to go around and think of a line or something and say to myself, "Darian would totally say that!" Now I think, "Rob would say that!" or "This is Cole!" or "Oh my gosh, this scenario is Ellis and Rob!"
I think of my characters all the time. I believe any good writer does. How can they not? They are a part of me. They feel tangible at times.
Anyway. MRJWC is at 73k+. I have two chapters to write. I know I said that a while ago but I added a chapter in the middle somewhere. It just fit. I rearranged some paragraphs and stuck them in other chapters. I added support details. Lots of them. I thought about "back story" and filled in details to support the personality of the characters. I've been doing a lot!
I also strive to create realistic people. I know that I've read comment here and there that said WLINE wasn't realistic, but I am trying not to fixate on those. To me it was real. Writing it was real. The pain was real. (And I am not implying I lived through everything in When Love Is Not Enough, I'm just saying I tried desperately to bring realism to the pages in that book.) In MRJWC I am trying hard to do the same. Realism. I WANT my characters to feel like you could meet them down the street. I want them to be people you can relate to or have a coffee with. I WANT them to be comfortable together and give the reader a sense of knowing them.
If I don't achieve these things, CALL ME OUT ON IT! I need to improve if I don't meet my personal goals. Help me to see my flaws. I welcome criticism. (Not saying I enjoy negative crit. but without it I can't grow as a writer.) Tell me what you don't get! If you do, then chances are I will make your next read that much more enjoyable because hopefully I will learn from my mistakes.
Things to keep in mind: I am writing m/m romance. Typically, this genre has some expectations from readers. Not that I always follow the rules (if there are such things) but... There is going to be sex between men. Sometimes it fits in perfectly. Sometimes it may seem like too much for some readers and others may want more. I write what comes out. I go with the flow and if it seems right for the two of them to "be intimate" in the setting, I go for it. I am against gratuitous sex in a book just to fill the pages. (Although, I have to say TCOL has a lot of sex. I may have to edit some out.)
Another thing is that I like to add people that I could possibly write more about. (Side characters, siblings, etc...) In doing that, it may seem like everyone in the town is gay. That is not my intent. I know that seems unlikely that all the characters end up gay, but part of that is me just trying to write more books. So if there is going to be an "unbelievable" factor, maybe that is it. Sorry. It is about writing more!
Sometimes I purposely leave out details. Like specific city names or the state. Several people have asked where WLINE is set? The answer is Maryland. Authors are supposed to write what they know because it helps create realism. (You know I like that!) I lived in Baltimore for a while. That is all I wish to say about that. I do not like sharing personal details, but I will say if you read my books all my personal details are in the pages. The characters are ME. They each have different facets of my personality. They each have details of specific things that happened to me. They each have something in them that is ME! If you want to know me, read. Even the disturbing characters get their deranged behavior from my corrupt mind. (Although I have NEVER hit anyone with a candle stick. I'm just sayin'...) And, fyi, MRJWC is set in Pennsylvania. :p
Boy, for not having anything to say I said a lot!
So... I guess that's all. I plan on writing today for a few hours. I sent a huge chunk of MRJWC to my "beta" reader. I hope she likes it. It is WAY different than WLINE! I guess it's like Leonardo DiCaprio going from Titanic to Shutter Island. I have to show my diversity as an author. Right? lol
Later,
Wade
xoxo
I don't have a whole heck of a lot to say. I've been writing. I would skip a blog all together but then people start to worry about me and post comments like "How ya doin' Wade?" and "Hope everything is okay with you." Not that comments are bad. I'm not saying that. I just don't want people to worry.
I'm fine.
I've been writing and editing. I normally edit as I go unless inspired to write long passages. Writers are often asked how they edit? A lot of the time I write, and then the next day I reread and change things. If I haven't written anything for a long spell on a particular project then I will read it, typically from the beginning, to get in the zone. I often read several chapters ahead of where my characters are so when I get to the end of the passage I am able to think of the next scene. Sometimes, if I am not at my computer, I will think about different parts I read recently and think of details to add. Even if it is one or two sentences it can add a lot to the understanding of how a character thinks and what they are doing.
In "My Roommate's A Jock? Well Crap!" (MRJWC) I have loads of characters that I have truly come to love. I developed a side character that I think is my favorite. Rob McAvoy. He is funny. (I think.) I used to go around and think of a line or something and say to myself, "Darian would totally say that!" Now I think, "Rob would say that!" or "This is Cole!" or "Oh my gosh, this scenario is Ellis and Rob!"
I think of my characters all the time. I believe any good writer does. How can they not? They are a part of me. They feel tangible at times.
Anyway. MRJWC is at 73k+. I have two chapters to write. I know I said that a while ago but I added a chapter in the middle somewhere. It just fit. I rearranged some paragraphs and stuck them in other chapters. I added support details. Lots of them. I thought about "back story" and filled in details to support the personality of the characters. I've been doing a lot!
I also strive to create realistic people. I know that I've read comment here and there that said WLINE wasn't realistic, but I am trying not to fixate on those. To me it was real. Writing it was real. The pain was real. (And I am not implying I lived through everything in When Love Is Not Enough, I'm just saying I tried desperately to bring realism to the pages in that book.) In MRJWC I am trying hard to do the same. Realism. I WANT my characters to feel like you could meet them down the street. I want them to be people you can relate to or have a coffee with. I WANT them to be comfortable together and give the reader a sense of knowing them.
If I don't achieve these things, CALL ME OUT ON IT! I need to improve if I don't meet my personal goals. Help me to see my flaws. I welcome criticism. (Not saying I enjoy negative crit. but without it I can't grow as a writer.) Tell me what you don't get! If you do, then chances are I will make your next read that much more enjoyable because hopefully I will learn from my mistakes.
Things to keep in mind: I am writing m/m romance. Typically, this genre has some expectations from readers. Not that I always follow the rules (if there are such things) but... There is going to be sex between men. Sometimes it fits in perfectly. Sometimes it may seem like too much for some readers and others may want more. I write what comes out. I go with the flow and if it seems right for the two of them to "be intimate" in the setting, I go for it. I am against gratuitous sex in a book just to fill the pages. (Although, I have to say TCOL has a lot of sex. I may have to edit some out.)
Another thing is that I like to add people that I could possibly write more about. (Side characters, siblings, etc...) In doing that, it may seem like everyone in the town is gay. That is not my intent. I know that seems unlikely that all the characters end up gay, but part of that is me just trying to write more books. So if there is going to be an "unbelievable" factor, maybe that is it. Sorry. It is about writing more!
Sometimes I purposely leave out details. Like specific city names or the state. Several people have asked where WLINE is set? The answer is Maryland. Authors are supposed to write what they know because it helps create realism. (You know I like that!) I lived in Baltimore for a while. That is all I wish to say about that. I do not like sharing personal details, but I will say if you read my books all my personal details are in the pages. The characters are ME. They each have different facets of my personality. They each have details of specific things that happened to me. They each have something in them that is ME! If you want to know me, read. Even the disturbing characters get their deranged behavior from my corrupt mind. (Although I have NEVER hit anyone with a candle stick. I'm just sayin'...) And, fyi, MRJWC is set in Pennsylvania. :p
Boy, for not having anything to say I said a lot!
So... I guess that's all. I plan on writing today for a few hours. I sent a huge chunk of MRJWC to my "beta" reader. I hope she likes it. It is WAY different than WLINE! I guess it's like Leonardo DiCaprio going from Titanic to Shutter Island. I have to show my diversity as an author. Right? lol
Later,
Wade
xoxo
You know you want to vote for me!
... or maybe you don't. That's okay too. It just seems like (to me) that When Love Is Not Enough is always "runner up" in any kind of list, competition, poll, or what have you that involves the words "tear jerker" and "Published in 2011". Mainly because Bear, Otter, and the Kid always out does me! This LIST is no different! BUT! I made the list! That is something. My only question is, "How does T.J. do it?" Besides being a really good writer he is so well known. Is there a secret to widespread popularity and marketing? Or is it simply "the book speaks for itself"? (Which is definitely true.)
I question this because way back when Hot Head came out, Damon Suede had like 5000 ratings on Goodreads before the first day of sales was over! How do people do that? I realize I am a nobody and my name is not really out there, but how does one GET IT OUT THERE? Do these authors know people? I think Damon has been in the business a while even though Hot Head was his first M/M publication so perhaps his swift popularity is due to "knowing" people. Maybe. But Mr. Klune, I Think, is as new as I am to the business. What does he do differently? Hmm, I guess one big one is HE DOESN'T WRITE ABOUT SUICIDE! So maybe I have to consider my topic when I write. His book also has a pretty damn funny KID in it! People love kids. Do I sound jealous? I am. But not in an unhealthy "I'm gonna boil your cat" sort of way. (Sorry, reference to a movie I saw once.) I yearn for a book that sells like that! I covet his ability to write something deeply moving AND popular.
Am I in it for the money? I'm glad you asked. Yes, and NO. I need money because I have none and in the perfect world I would get paid to do what I love: WRITE! As we all know this is not a perfect world. So what do I choose to do? Write about suicide and scare people off. This is actually the way my life goes often so it should not surprise me! However, I seriously feel I DID NOT CHOOSE this topic or story. I feel my gift or writing comes from God and When Love Is Not Enough is the story God wanted me to write. My therapist asked me where I thought my ideas and stories came from and that IS the answer I gave her. God. I feel I have a purpose that goes beyond the words on the page. I feel I have a purpose that involves the heart. More specifically, the hearts of my readers.
The truest example of that came to me AGAIN this week in the form of a "new friend online". Lets call him DUDE. :) (Because I'm retarded and need mental help.) So... Dude writes me to thank me for my book. I have had this happen before. Tom was one of the first people I blogged about who wrote to me to thank me for what I wrote and make me feel like the pain I experienced in that writing was worth it. Dude did no less than that. Alright, I am annoying myself calling him Dude. It makes this sound less sincere. This FRIEND I talked to was really kind and blew me away by his expression of how much MY STORY meant to him. And he told my that what I wrote resonated with his own history etc in many ways. (Friend, if you read this, I am getting that from reading the "message" you send me that your friend wrote and extrapolating what I think you meant. If you know what I mean?) AND, oddly, I think The Cost of Loving will hit him ever harder. (considering the content of that "message" he sent.)
Friend sent me a quote that said "Stephen King said that if you're writing to make money, you're waisting you're time." and friend told me "You write for the right reasons." For his sake and others out there who feel the same way and haven't contacted me, I HOPE I CAN KEEP THAT GOAL IN MIND EVERY TIME I WRITE!
I am not in it for the money. It would be nice! I would LOVE to do this as a career because I love writing. But truly, I write because me heart is involved. I feel for the pain of the world. I want people t see they are not alone in their struggles and that they can find hope! There is always HOPE! Yes, my stories are fiction. My characters are fictional. (Otherwise the book would be under NON-FICTION, not m/m romance.) BUT I do strive to write realistically. I pull from everything I know, and see, and feel, and experience around me and I pour it onto the pages. If you are out there, and you are like FRIEND who felt a deep connection to my writing and MY BOOK helped you in ANY WAY, then I have accomplished what I wanted to achieve as a writer. I want to touch people's lives. Truly, deeply, sincerely, and in the heart. Will I ever make money at it? I can only hope so! But for now, I will simply write the stories I think people need to hear.
So thank you, Friend, your words meant something to me too!
Conclusion: TJ can have the fame and fortune, and I will live out my dismal life, poor and invisible yet with a great sense of knowing I made a difference to specific people. Not the world as a whole by storm, but one heart at a time.
:)
On a freaky side-note... "Friend" looks exactly like Cole in my new story. Blew me away! I was like "Holy Shi...." I find it bizarrely odd that I write a character and describe him in such a way, and then come across someone who looks exactly like the person in my imagination. WOW!
My Roommate's A Jock will be submitted soon, people! I am working on edits and relearning the use of the comma. Going word by word through a manuscript is SLOW work, but I hope it pays off! This one should be fun and more widely accepted. And I am still waiting to hear back about TCOL.
Cheers. I hope y'all have a great weekend!
If you are bored. Go to the Goodreads LISTS and vote! Of course I imply "vote for me!" but there are loads of good books out there to stick in a list.
Best Tear Jerker!
Best Romance published 2011
Favorite couple (Duh! Darian and Matt!)
I question this because way back when Hot Head came out, Damon Suede had like 5000 ratings on Goodreads before the first day of sales was over! How do people do that? I realize I am a nobody and my name is not really out there, but how does one GET IT OUT THERE? Do these authors know people? I think Damon has been in the business a while even though Hot Head was his first M/M publication so perhaps his swift popularity is due to "knowing" people. Maybe. But Mr. Klune, I Think, is as new as I am to the business. What does he do differently? Hmm, I guess one big one is HE DOESN'T WRITE ABOUT SUICIDE! So maybe I have to consider my topic when I write. His book also has a pretty damn funny KID in it! People love kids. Do I sound jealous? I am. But not in an unhealthy "I'm gonna boil your cat" sort of way. (Sorry, reference to a movie I saw once.) I yearn for a book that sells like that! I covet his ability to write something deeply moving AND popular.
Am I in it for the money? I'm glad you asked. Yes, and NO. I need money because I have none and in the perfect world I would get paid to do what I love: WRITE! As we all know this is not a perfect world. So what do I choose to do? Write about suicide and scare people off. This is actually the way my life goes often so it should not surprise me! However, I seriously feel I DID NOT CHOOSE this topic or story. I feel my gift or writing comes from God and When Love Is Not Enough is the story God wanted me to write. My therapist asked me where I thought my ideas and stories came from and that IS the answer I gave her. God. I feel I have a purpose that goes beyond the words on the page. I feel I have a purpose that involves the heart. More specifically, the hearts of my readers.
The truest example of that came to me AGAIN this week in the form of a "new friend online". Lets call him DUDE. :) (Because I'm retarded and need mental help.) So... Dude writes me to thank me for my book. I have had this happen before. Tom was one of the first people I blogged about who wrote to me to thank me for what I wrote and make me feel like the pain I experienced in that writing was worth it. Dude did no less than that. Alright, I am annoying myself calling him Dude. It makes this sound less sincere. This FRIEND I talked to was really kind and blew me away by his expression of how much MY STORY meant to him. And he told my that what I wrote resonated with his own history etc in many ways. (Friend, if you read this, I am getting that from reading the "message" you send me that your friend wrote and extrapolating what I think you meant. If you know what I mean?) AND, oddly, I think The Cost of Loving will hit him ever harder. (considering the content of that "message" he sent.)
Friend sent me a quote that said "Stephen King said that if you're writing to make money, you're waisting you're time." and friend told me "You write for the right reasons." For his sake and others out there who feel the same way and haven't contacted me, I HOPE I CAN KEEP THAT GOAL IN MIND EVERY TIME I WRITE!
I am not in it for the money. It would be nice! I would LOVE to do this as a career because I love writing. But truly, I write because me heart is involved. I feel for the pain of the world. I want people t see they are not alone in their struggles and that they can find hope! There is always HOPE! Yes, my stories are fiction. My characters are fictional. (Otherwise the book would be under NON-FICTION, not m/m romance.) BUT I do strive to write realistically. I pull from everything I know, and see, and feel, and experience around me and I pour it onto the pages. If you are out there, and you are like FRIEND who felt a deep connection to my writing and MY BOOK helped you in ANY WAY, then I have accomplished what I wanted to achieve as a writer. I want to touch people's lives. Truly, deeply, sincerely, and in the heart. Will I ever make money at it? I can only hope so! But for now, I will simply write the stories I think people need to hear.
So thank you, Friend, your words meant something to me too!
Conclusion: TJ can have the fame and fortune, and I will live out my dismal life, poor and invisible yet with a great sense of knowing I made a difference to specific people. Not the world as a whole by storm, but one heart at a time.
:)
On a freaky side-note... "Friend" looks exactly like Cole in my new story. Blew me away! I was like "Holy Shi...." I find it bizarrely odd that I write a character and describe him in such a way, and then come across someone who looks exactly like the person in my imagination. WOW!
My Roommate's A Jock will be submitted soon, people! I am working on edits and relearning the use of the comma. Going word by word through a manuscript is SLOW work, but I hope it pays off! This one should be fun and more widely accepted. And I am still waiting to hear back about TCOL.
Cheers. I hope y'all have a great weekend!
If you are bored. Go to the Goodreads LISTS and vote! Of course I imply "vote for me!" but there are loads of good books out there to stick in a list.
Best Tear Jerker!
Best Romance published 2011
Favorite couple (Duh! Darian and Matt!)
This is WHY I write unpopular stuff.
This video I tragic but how many people blow it off and don't care? OR don't even know this happens because that are all closed up in their safe little homes.
(trying to embed video here but it doesn't work. Click the Tom and Shane link to view video on You Tube.
This tragic story of Tom and Shane is out there. THIS REALLY HAPPENS. Shane even says he has to post this so others will know about it and think about it incase the unthinkable happens in their lives. We are not in a free culture. America seems free because we DO have more freedoms than so many other countries. We do! For the most part, people are not jailed and tortured as easily HERE as they are in other countries for being gay. Being gay in America is not a crime punishable by death. (Although, I bet there are people who think it should be.) There are many places in the US of A that are NOT "gay friendly" and do not welcome same sex couples. We all know this! Don't we? Or maybe you don't think about it at all?
In m/m romance for the most part (the genre I fell into) the same sex couples have fairy tale lives. They are cowboys, or vampires, or shapeshifters and they have a lot of sex. They fall in love. They defy someone here and there, or some opposition and beat the odds and live happily ever after. And oddly enough, they probably have a brother that is gay, ad a cousin, and a neighbor, so that every book written that follows has the same setting etc... It's all happy. Yes, there maybe gay-bashing but it is small and gotten over quickly.
Have I written the stereotypical novel based on that. Yes. I guess I have to some extent. Darian is not a shapeshifter, and jamie isn't a cowboy, but Matt IS a firefighter. And then there is my newest one... My Roommate's a Jock? Well, Crap! This novel will definitely be more widely accepted. It is funny. It HAS an HAE. It has romance and angst and memorable characters. People will love it. Blockbuster? Probably not. It is MY book after all and I am not that lucky. But, as it is MY book, I do have controversial stuff included. One chapter is called "Hate Crimes" for a reason. (You will have to read it to know what hate crimes I write about). I Did not set out to write "popularity". I just sat down with a scene in my head of a camping trip and I went on from there. (The camping trip is chapter 6. "Rainy andWhet Wet" It is so funny. -in my opinion.) Did I KNOW comedy was going to come out? No. Not right away. I don't really think a head that much. I get an idea and I run with it. I had a name "Cole" and then I thought of an opening line "Someone told me I’m a cynical fatalist but I prefer the term realist." From there on it seemed like I needed to write fun and upbeat. It FIT Cole. AND it was a refreshing change from writing DARK.
Darian and Matt (and Jamie for that matter) are hard and painful to write sometimes. BUT, I write pain because I think that is what people need to hear. I write reality because it is, um, REAL. Things like this happen! And for all those people out there who go through pain, tragedy, and losing a loved one, (Like Shane in the video I linked) I want to tell then YOU ARE NOT ALONE! Because it is easy to think, "I'm the only one who feels like this." It is easy to give into the lie, "No one feels this pain like I do." TRUE, no one knows your pain as intimately as you, BUT there ARE other who feel pain. Life is not pretty. If we carry our pain alone it is heavy and overwhelming and crippling. There are support groups for "losing children", and "losing spouses" etc... But where are the support groups for "I just lost my same-sex partner of ten years"? Same sex couple marriage is not recognized in most states. And even if it IS recognized in some states I do not think it is recognized FEDERALLY . (feel free to comment and correct me if I am wrong.)
I WANT to write about characters like this. Like the people who really exist and really live in fear and pain and tragedy. But where do I submit this theme? I don't know. As we have already seen, TCOL was rejected twice. (and submitted again, but I seriously think it will not fly there either.) So where do I turn? >>Here is where comments come in! Feel free to post publishers you have heard of that DO NOT typically publish the "popular" stuff. I need to know. Real life, angsty pain, autobiographies, hate crimes, true life struggles, because not not every gay man is a cowboy. Not all gay couples have a HEA. But I do admit I like the gay couples who have a lot of sex. It gives me hope. (I like to dream.)
Do I have a story like Tom and Shane's in me to tell? I don't know. But if I DO, I'd like to know where to send it to be published. Any thoughts?
Tell me what you think. I like reading comments!
xoxo
Wade
(trying to embed video here but it doesn't work. Click the Tom and Shane link to view video on You Tube.
This tragic story of Tom and Shane is out there. THIS REALLY HAPPENS. Shane even says he has to post this so others will know about it and think about it incase the unthinkable happens in their lives. We are not in a free culture. America seems free because we DO have more freedoms than so many other countries. We do! For the most part, people are not jailed and tortured as easily HERE as they are in other countries for being gay. Being gay in America is not a crime punishable by death. (Although, I bet there are people who think it should be.) There are many places in the US of A that are NOT "gay friendly" and do not welcome same sex couples. We all know this! Don't we? Or maybe you don't think about it at all?
In m/m romance for the most part (the genre I fell into) the same sex couples have fairy tale lives. They are cowboys, or vampires, or shapeshifters and they have a lot of sex. They fall in love. They defy someone here and there, or some opposition and beat the odds and live happily ever after. And oddly enough, they probably have a brother that is gay, ad a cousin, and a neighbor, so that every book written that follows has the same setting etc... It's all happy. Yes, there maybe gay-bashing but it is small and gotten over quickly.
Have I written the stereotypical novel based on that. Yes. I guess I have to some extent. Darian is not a shapeshifter, and jamie isn't a cowboy, but Matt IS a firefighter. And then there is my newest one... My Roommate's a Jock? Well, Crap! This novel will definitely be more widely accepted. It is funny. It HAS an HAE. It has romance and angst and memorable characters. People will love it. Blockbuster? Probably not. It is MY book after all and I am not that lucky. But, as it is MY book, I do have controversial stuff included. One chapter is called "Hate Crimes" for a reason. (You will have to read it to know what hate crimes I write about). I Did not set out to write "popularity". I just sat down with a scene in my head of a camping trip and I went on from there. (The camping trip is chapter 6. "Rainy and
Darian and Matt (and Jamie for that matter) are hard and painful to write sometimes. BUT, I write pain because I think that is what people need to hear. I write reality because it is, um, REAL. Things like this happen! And for all those people out there who go through pain, tragedy, and losing a loved one, (Like Shane in the video I linked) I want to tell then YOU ARE NOT ALONE! Because it is easy to think, "I'm the only one who feels like this." It is easy to give into the lie, "No one feels this pain like I do." TRUE, no one knows your pain as intimately as you, BUT there ARE other who feel pain. Life is not pretty. If we carry our pain alone it is heavy and overwhelming and crippling. There are support groups for "losing children", and "losing spouses" etc... But where are the support groups for "I just lost my same-sex partner of ten years"? Same sex couple marriage is not recognized in most states. And even if it IS recognized in some states I do not think it is recognized FEDERALLY . (feel free to comment and correct me if I am wrong.)
I WANT to write about characters like this. Like the people who really exist and really live in fear and pain and tragedy. But where do I submit this theme? I don't know. As we have already seen, TCOL was rejected twice. (and submitted again, but I seriously think it will not fly there either.) So where do I turn? >>Here is where comments come in! Feel free to post publishers you have heard of that DO NOT typically publish the "popular" stuff. I need to know. Real life, angsty pain, autobiographies, hate crimes, true life struggles, because not not every gay man is a cowboy. Not all gay couples have a HEA. But I do admit I like the gay couples who have a lot of sex. It gives me hope. (I like to dream.)
Do I have a story like Tom and Shane's in me to tell? I don't know. But if I DO, I'd like to know where to send it to be published. Any thoughts?
Tell me what you think. I like reading comments!
xoxo
Wade
