Jim Vuksic's Blog, page 3
September 9, 2021
Disagree Without Being Disagreeable
All too often, during a debate, discussion, or even a casual conversation, there are some who seem unable or unwilling to disagree with someone else's belief or opinion without insulting, attacking, or mocking the other person .
At 74 years of age, I have learned that I am not always right and that others are not always wrong. One may participate in a spirited debate without having to insult or ridicule those with opposing opinions. Some debates end with both sides having to agree to disagree and to do so civily and maturely.
My father used to say, "The first one to lose their temper loses the argument". That statment may not be profound or even always true, but it has served as a guide for me personally throughout my life.
At 74 years of age, I have learned that I am not always right and that others are not always wrong. One may participate in a spirited debate without having to insult or ridicule those with opposing opinions. Some debates end with both sides having to agree to disagree and to do so civily and maturely.
My father used to say, "The first one to lose their temper loses the argument". That statment may not be profound or even always true, but it has served as a guide for me personally throughout my life.
August 6, 2021
Literary Website: Perhaps a Misnomer
In 2013, while searching for a literrary website to join, I was attracted to several positive comments referencing Goodreads, so join I did.
During my 8 years and 9 months of membership to-date, I have enjoyed viewing and occasionally participating in a number of discussion groups. The topics of many of the discussions and members' posted reviews have encouraged me to purchase, read, and thoroughly enjoy many books which I may have otherwise never noticed.
Lately, I have noticed more and more members who have never yet posted a rating, review, or title of a book they have read, intend to read or are reading. Many of the recent discussion groups and topics have nothing to do with literature in any way, shape, or form.
I enjoy variety and eclectic taste in discussion matter as well as most; however, as an avid reader, I wonder if the title Literary Website will accurately describe Goodreads in the near future. What do you think?
During my 8 years and 9 months of membership to-date, I have enjoyed viewing and occasionally participating in a number of discussion groups. The topics of many of the discussions and members' posted reviews have encouraged me to purchase, read, and thoroughly enjoy many books which I may have otherwise never noticed.
Lately, I have noticed more and more members who have never yet posted a rating, review, or title of a book they have read, intend to read or are reading. Many of the recent discussion groups and topics have nothing to do with literature in any way, shape, or form.
I enjoy variety and eclectic taste in discussion matter as well as most; however, as an avid reader, I wonder if the title Literary Website will accurately describe Goodreads in the near future. What do you think?
July 4, 2021
Declare Your Independence on Independence Day
"Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter, and those who matter don't mind."
Bernard Baruch (Financier/Statesman/Author) 1870 - 1965.
Society tends to discourage, criticize, and even condemn behavior or beliefs which it considers counter productive, disruptive, and even harmful to standards, beliefs, and traditions established by those in positions of power and influence.
It is tempting to desire to blend in, be accepted, and avoid criticism or ostracism.
Life is too short to waste it trying to be anyone other than the person you truly are. Embrace the fact that you are a uniqe human being and not a mass-produced product.
Be yourself; everyone else is already taken."
Oscar Wilde (Playwright/Author/Poet) 1854 - 1900.
Bernard Baruch (Financier/Statesman/Author) 1870 - 1965.
Society tends to discourage, criticize, and even condemn behavior or beliefs which it considers counter productive, disruptive, and even harmful to standards, beliefs, and traditions established by those in positions of power and influence.
It is tempting to desire to blend in, be accepted, and avoid criticism or ostracism.
Life is too short to waste it trying to be anyone other than the person you truly are. Embrace the fact that you are a uniqe human being and not a mass-produced product.
Be yourself; everyone else is already taken."
Oscar Wilde (Playwright/Author/Poet) 1854 - 1900.
June 11, 2021
When I Grow Up I Want to Be...
What child hasn't been asked "What do you want to be when you grow up?"
When I was 14-years-old, I thought I wanted to be a priest. In September of 1961 I took up residence at St. Mark Roman Catholic Seminary in Erie, Pennsylvania. By June, 1965, I realized I no longer wished to be a priest.
In 1966 I enlisted in the U.S. Marine Corps. After completing boot camp at Parris Island, South Carolina and infantry training at Camp Lejeune, North Carolina, I came home for a 20-day leave and informed my parents that I loved the Marine Corps way of life and intended to make it a career. By the end of my 13-month tour of duty in Vietnam, I decided I no longer wished to be a Marine.
In 1968, I got a job with the H.J. Heinz Company as a shipping clerk and was determined to become a manager. 33 years later, at the age of 54, I retired as the manager of the Heinz Company's Pittsburgh, Pennaylvania facility.
In 1970 I married my late wife. We had five children and enjoyed 35 wonderful years together.
I will be 74-years-old next month. My adult children and grandchildren tell me that they are patiently waiting for me to grow up. I still am not sure what I want to be when I finally do.
When I was 14-years-old, I thought I wanted to be a priest. In September of 1961 I took up residence at St. Mark Roman Catholic Seminary in Erie, Pennsylvania. By June, 1965, I realized I no longer wished to be a priest.
In 1966 I enlisted in the U.S. Marine Corps. After completing boot camp at Parris Island, South Carolina and infantry training at Camp Lejeune, North Carolina, I came home for a 20-day leave and informed my parents that I loved the Marine Corps way of life and intended to make it a career. By the end of my 13-month tour of duty in Vietnam, I decided I no longer wished to be a Marine.
In 1968, I got a job with the H.J. Heinz Company as a shipping clerk and was determined to become a manager. 33 years later, at the age of 54, I retired as the manager of the Heinz Company's Pittsburgh, Pennaylvania facility.
In 1970 I married my late wife. We had five children and enjoyed 35 wonderful years together.
I will be 74-years-old next month. My adult children and grandchildren tell me that they are patiently waiting for me to grow up. I still am not sure what I want to be when I finally do.
May 15, 2021
The Ultimate Marriage Goal
The traditional marriage vow once included the phrase "...until death do we part!" It is seldom said anymore because, all too often, a marriage ends long before death parts the couple because one spouse will occasionally say or do something that seriously irritates, disappoints, hurts, or angers the other.
Even a successful marriage will eventually come to a sad end when one of the partners dies.
Occasionally, the surviving partner will think back on all the times that they and their spouse spent together - both pleasant and irritating. On those occasions, will you have to say "I wish I had been more patient and understanding or I wish I had said or done this instead of that."
Every married couple's ultimate goal should be, when the time comes, to be able to honestly say "No Regrets!"
Even a successful marriage will eventually come to a sad end when one of the partners dies.
Occasionally, the surviving partner will think back on all the times that they and their spouse spent together - both pleasant and irritating. On those occasions, will you have to say "I wish I had been more patient and understanding or I wish I had said or done this instead of that."
Every married couple's ultimate goal should be, when the time comes, to be able to honestly say "No Regrets!"
March 10, 2021
How to Generate Reviews
Every book, article, literary course, and lecture authored or conducted by well-established, commercially successful authors on the subject agree that sales drive reviews, not the other way around.
Soliciting and/or offering some type of compensation or reciprocation will not generate honest, objective reviews. Sales will.
Focus upon striving to continuously improve upon your technical writing, promotional, and marketing knowledge and skills, then sales will improve. Reviews will follow.
Keep in mind that generic reviews are merely personal, and therefore subjective, opinions. One reader's Best book ever! may very well be another reader's Worst book ever! which is why most astute readers do not allow a review to influence their purchasing choice one way or the other.
Soliciting and/or offering some type of compensation or reciprocation will not generate honest, objective reviews. Sales will.
Focus upon striving to continuously improve upon your technical writing, promotional, and marketing knowledge and skills, then sales will improve. Reviews will follow.
Keep in mind that generic reviews are merely personal, and therefore subjective, opinions. One reader's Best book ever! may very well be another reader's Worst book ever! which is why most astute readers do not allow a review to influence their purchasing choice one way or the other.
February 3, 2021
'Author' - The Only Title Necessary!
Not very long ago, authors were usually identified utilizing one of three categories: traditionally published, self-published, or published by a vanity press.
For whatever reason, many self-published writers now refer to themselves as being an 'indie' (independent) author.
An author is either traditionally published, self-published, or utilizes a vanity press. All authors are independent! They write when, how, and if they wish. Unless of course a contract (to which they have independently agreed) stipulates otherwise. So, the title of a published writer is simply 'Author'.
The quality of the technical writing knowledge and application, narrative style, and entertainment value determine whether a book is good, mediocre, or not worth reading, not the method of publication.
For whatever reason, many self-published writers now refer to themselves as being an 'indie' (independent) author.
An author is either traditionally published, self-published, or utilizes a vanity press. All authors are independent! They write when, how, and if they wish. Unless of course a contract (to which they have independently agreed) stipulates otherwise. So, the title of a published writer is simply 'Author'.
The quality of the technical writing knowledge and application, narrative style, and entertainment value determine whether a book is good, mediocre, or not worth reading, not the method of publication.
December 13, 2020
Excuses and Denial versus Reasons and Acceptance
Seventy-three years of life experiences have taught me that there are two basic types of people: Those who make excuses for failing or flatly deny they have failed and those who accept responsibility for having failed and accept the fact that they did not succeed.
No one possess the skillset, knowledge, or talent to succeed in every endeavor. Learn to honestly and humbly accept credit for your successes and responsibility for your failures.
I played sports, but was never good enough to make a school team or even be picked first during neighborhood games.
I served honorably in the military, but was neither talented or skillful enough to be assigned to an elite unit.
I wrote a novel. It was published, but did not achieve commercial success during its 5 1/2 years of availability.
However, I had a 33-year management career , earning financial rewards that made it possible to enjoy a very comfortable retirement beginning at age 54.
My wife and I were happily married for 35 1/2 wonderful years and had 5 beautiful children and now I have 4 beautiful grandchildren.
I have visited 45 of the United States and 5 foreign countries.
I do not hesitate to take full credit for the accomplishments and total responsibility for the failures.
No one possess the skillset, knowledge, or talent to succeed in every endeavor. Learn to honestly and humbly accept credit for your successes and responsibility for your failures.
I played sports, but was never good enough to make a school team or even be picked first during neighborhood games.
I served honorably in the military, but was neither talented or skillful enough to be assigned to an elite unit.
I wrote a novel. It was published, but did not achieve commercial success during its 5 1/2 years of availability.
However, I had a 33-year management career , earning financial rewards that made it possible to enjoy a very comfortable retirement beginning at age 54.
My wife and I were happily married for 35 1/2 wonderful years and had 5 beautiful children and now I have 4 beautiful grandchildren.
I have visited 45 of the United States and 5 foreign countries.
I do not hesitate to take full credit for the accomplishments and total responsibility for the failures.
November 7, 2020
I May Love You, But Not Like You.
The words love and like are often utilized by some to express the same feeling. However, they are not the same.
As soon as my children were old enough to comprehend what I was saying I preached the following sermon. (A curious choice of words considering the fact that I am an Atheist.)
"You are my child, and for that reason alone, I love you and always will. That does not necessarily mean that I will always like you.
If my liking you is important, it is imperative that you follow the following rules.
- Never be a bully.
- Never call someone demeaning names.
- Never make fun of or mimic someone's speech, hearing or mobility impairment.
- Always tell the truth; even when you would rather not.
- Do not allow vanity to rule your life. Looks are deceiving and are often fleeting. Never make fun of others' physical appearance.
- Never be a sore loser. Always be a gracious winner.
My four children are now middle-aged and I still love and like them very much. They often express their love for me, and they often let me know they like me through words and action.
My children have always remembered that sermon I preached to them decades ago. In fact they have preached it to their children.
As soon as my children were old enough to comprehend what I was saying I preached the following sermon. (A curious choice of words considering the fact that I am an Atheist.)
"You are my child, and for that reason alone, I love you and always will. That does not necessarily mean that I will always like you.
If my liking you is important, it is imperative that you follow the following rules.
- Never be a bully.
- Never call someone demeaning names.
- Never make fun of or mimic someone's speech, hearing or mobility impairment.
- Always tell the truth; even when you would rather not.
- Do not allow vanity to rule your life. Looks are deceiving and are often fleeting. Never make fun of others' physical appearance.
- Never be a sore loser. Always be a gracious winner.
My four children are now middle-aged and I still love and like them very much. They often express their love for me, and they often let me know they like me through words and action.
My children have always remembered that sermon I preached to them decades ago. In fact they have preached it to their children.
October 7, 2020
I Hate the Words "For Your Age..."
At 73 years of age, I have come to despise the words "...for your age".
Examples:
- You look great for your age.
- You're very active for your age.
- You are quite energetic for your age.
- You are extremely outgoing for your age.
- You are a fun-person to be with for your age.
- You date quite a lot for your age.
Do you see where I'm going with this? If you truly wish to compliment someone who just happens to have been around for quite awhile, try to express the compliment without hinting that the accomplishment or activity would not be worth complementing if the object of the complement was not ancient.
Examples:
- You look great for your age.
- You're very active for your age.
- You are quite energetic for your age.
- You are extremely outgoing for your age.
- You are a fun-person to be with for your age.
- You date quite a lot for your age.
Do you see where I'm going with this? If you truly wish to compliment someone who just happens to have been around for quite awhile, try to express the compliment without hinting that the accomplishment or activity would not be worth complementing if the object of the complement was not ancient.
