Mark R. Hunter's Blog, page 92
November 26, 2014
All about why my writing's in a mall
Slightly Off The Mark, A Primer, or: How Did I Get In The Mall?
http://www.4countymall.com/mark-hunte...
“I could have taken a decades-overdue vacation from ‘Slightly Off The Mark’, but I’m not one to just sit idly by while I go broke.”
(Every time you follow the Kendallville Mall on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/kendallville...) ... a mall Santa gets his wings.)
http://www.4countymall.com/mark-hunte...
“I could have taken a decades-overdue vacation from ‘Slightly Off The Mark’, but I’m not one to just sit idly by while I go broke.”
(Every time you follow the Kendallville Mall on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/kendallville...) ... a mall Santa gets his wings.)
November 20, 2014
An Unhealthy Historical Fail
I want to apologize to everyone I’ve been in contact with about photos for the “Images Of America: Albion and Noble County” project. With my daughter sick for so long and in the hospital for over a week, and the book signing to prepare for, I haven’t gotten back to people like I planned to. I’ll get back on it—as soon as I’m feeling better.
Emily gave me her virus, although oddly, I don’t seem to be quite as sick as she’s been. Usually I get the man flu and curl into a whiney little ball (not that I’m not whining). She’s slowly getting a little better, while I seem to be getting a little worse, so we haven’t been able to visit Charis as much as I’d hoped. Now I’m hoping that by the time you read this she’ll be home, although there’s still a lot of work to do on her health.
What Charis is going through is much worse than bronchitis, and the only thing I can say for it is that it’s not contagious: My shift partner seems to also have what Emily and I have. Sometimes it’s not nice to share.
Emily gave me her virus, although oddly, I don’t seem to be quite as sick as she’s been. Usually I get the man flu and curl into a whiney little ball (not that I’m not whining). She’s slowly getting a little better, while I seem to be getting a little worse, so we haven’t been able to visit Charis as much as I’d hoped. Now I’m hoping that by the time you read this she’ll be home, although there’s still a lot of work to do on her health.
What Charis is going through is much worse than bronchitis, and the only thing I can say for it is that it’s not contagious: My shift partner seems to also have what Emily and I have. Sometimes it’s not nice to share.
November 18, 2014
I would feel bad, but …
The bad news is, the book signing didn’t go so great. The good news is, the only person at fault was Mother Nature—and we already knew Mother Nature hates me anyway.
I did sell nine books, and got to talk to some great people, and hey—how better to spend a miserable day than in the library? But we got slammed by the weather. Local schools were canceled, roads and sidewalks were slick and icky, and the high temperature was lower than the normal low temperature for mid-November. Nobody wants to go out in crap like that, especially with wind and occasional snow squalls blasting through.
The folks at the Noble County Public Library—who were great, by the way—kept remarking on how amazingly quiet it was. Maybe I should have rescheduled, but after so much time and effort promoting it, I felt duty bound to go on. The library also put in a lot of work, complete with a flier that they posted on Facebook and on their monitor screens. So again, no one can be faulted but the weather, and I still sold more books than I have at some past signings.
My next step: Get those people who would have shown up if it had been nicer to buy books, and promote for Christmas shopping season! Because even an early winter won’t get me down. Much.
I did sell nine books, and got to talk to some great people, and hey—how better to spend a miserable day than in the library? But we got slammed by the weather. Local schools were canceled, roads and sidewalks were slick and icky, and the high temperature was lower than the normal low temperature for mid-November. Nobody wants to go out in crap like that, especially with wind and occasional snow squalls blasting through.
The folks at the Noble County Public Library—who were great, by the way—kept remarking on how amazingly quiet it was. Maybe I should have rescheduled, but after so much time and effort promoting it, I felt duty bound to go on. The library also put in a lot of work, complete with a flier that they posted on Facebook and on their monitor screens. So again, no one can be faulted but the weather, and I still sold more books than I have at some past signings.
My next step: Get those people who would have shown up if it had been nicer to buy books, and promote for Christmas shopping season! Because even an early winter won’t get me down. Much.
November 15, 2014
November 13, 2014
Why The Subconscious Hates Book Signings
I’m sure some writers approach public appearances with the confidence of TV’s Richard Castle, who swaggers into every room like he has the world by the keyboard. Then again, maybe not … Castle seems to have become a bestselling novelist without ever actually writing. In other words, he’s every writer’s dream.
I, on the other hand, have to actually pound away at the keyboard to produce a manuscript. Probably I’m more representative. If that’s true, then most writers approach book signings with no confidence at all. What’s worse? That no one will show up at all, or that they’ll show up to point and laugh at your temerity in thinking you actually deserve any sort of success?
Like most things, the anticipation is worse than the reality. (Not with dentists. Oh, not with dentists.) Still, as I approach the next book signing, I can’t help thinking: Is somebody going to finally call me out?
Dude, you suck. What makes you think people will actually want to read your books?
“Hey, I’m published!”
So was Hitler.
“That’s just mean.”
That’s my subconscious speaking. But my subconscious assures me every time that real people will show up and say the same thing.
It used to whisper to me, “You’re a horrible writer!” Finally, after a few decades, I came to accept that I was actually a pretty good writer. Then it started whispering, “There are millions of good writers! You’re a little minnow in a big sea. You’re so pathetic that even your subconscious can’t come up with a cliché that doesn’t involve little fish in the ocean.”
Other times it gets bored and switches: You’ll never write full time! You’ll die at a keyboard, working two full time jobs and never taking the time to vegetate on the couch with chips and dip.
“Oh, yeah? Well, my wife and doctor won’t let me eat chips and dip anymore, so there!”
Nice riposte, use that in your imaginary Pulitzer speech.
Is it any wonder, then, that I hate promoting myself? Okay, I have a book signing coming up Monday, at the Noble County Public Library in Albion. So why can’t I just yell it out, rather than writing some long article about it? “Hey, be there! Three to six p.m. on Main Street! I’ll have all my books!”
You’re pathetic. That’s your own home turf, what are you worried about? Try having a book signing in Chicago, see who shows up there.
“You’re my subconscious, you just called yourself pathetic.”
I know. It’s pathetic.
You can’t win when you take on your own subconscious.
By the time November 17th rolls around I’ll be too worried about the details of the signing to let my inner voice bother me. I’ll sell some copies of my various works, go home happy that anyone bought any at all, and go back to work on my next book project.
Then the voice will start whispering again. But you know what? I’m a good writer, by gosh, so I’ll ignore it … at least, until it’s time to send in the next manuscript.
I signed a book for a Senator, so there.
I, on the other hand, have to actually pound away at the keyboard to produce a manuscript. Probably I’m more representative. If that’s true, then most writers approach book signings with no confidence at all. What’s worse? That no one will show up at all, or that they’ll show up to point and laugh at your temerity in thinking you actually deserve any sort of success?
Like most things, the anticipation is worse than the reality. (Not with dentists. Oh, not with dentists.) Still, as I approach the next book signing, I can’t help thinking: Is somebody going to finally call me out?
Dude, you suck. What makes you think people will actually want to read your books?
“Hey, I’m published!”
So was Hitler.
“That’s just mean.”
That’s my subconscious speaking. But my subconscious assures me every time that real people will show up and say the same thing.
It used to whisper to me, “You’re a horrible writer!” Finally, after a few decades, I came to accept that I was actually a pretty good writer. Then it started whispering, “There are millions of good writers! You’re a little minnow in a big sea. You’re so pathetic that even your subconscious can’t come up with a cliché that doesn’t involve little fish in the ocean.”
Other times it gets bored and switches: You’ll never write full time! You’ll die at a keyboard, working two full time jobs and never taking the time to vegetate on the couch with chips and dip.
“Oh, yeah? Well, my wife and doctor won’t let me eat chips and dip anymore, so there!”
Nice riposte, use that in your imaginary Pulitzer speech.
Is it any wonder, then, that I hate promoting myself? Okay, I have a book signing coming up Monday, at the Noble County Public Library in Albion. So why can’t I just yell it out, rather than writing some long article about it? “Hey, be there! Three to six p.m. on Main Street! I’ll have all my books!”
You’re pathetic. That’s your own home turf, what are you worried about? Try having a book signing in Chicago, see who shows up there.
“You’re my subconscious, you just called yourself pathetic.”
I know. It’s pathetic.
You can’t win when you take on your own subconscious.
By the time November 17th rolls around I’ll be too worried about the details of the signing to let my inner voice bother me. I’ll sell some copies of my various works, go home happy that anyone bought any at all, and go back to work on my next book project.
Then the voice will start whispering again. But you know what? I’m a good writer, by gosh, so I’ll ignore it … at least, until it’s time to send in the next manuscript.
I signed a book for a Senator, so there.
November 10, 2014
Book 'Em, Dano
Books? I got ‘em. Ahead of my book signing on November 17th, I took delivery of ten copies of Storm Chaser and twenty copies of The No-Campfire Girls, and I already had plenty of The Notorious Ian Grant and Smoky Days And Sleepless Nights on hand. Just in time for Christmas gift giving—to others, or yourself. I think I’ve even still got a few copies of My Funny Valentine around.
And don’t be surprised if you see some special prices when you show up that Monday.
Now all I need is people, so remember to stop by! 3-6 p.m. at the main branch of the Noble County Public Library, at 813 E Main Street in Albion. We’ll stay a little later if people are still wandering in. Look forward to seeing you!
And don’t be surprised if you see some special prices when you show up that Monday.
Now all I need is people, so remember to stop by! 3-6 p.m. at the main branch of the Noble County Public Library, at 813 E Main Street in Albion. We’ll stay a little later if people are still wandering in. Look forward to seeing you!
November 5, 2014
Say Cheese For History
In all the fuss of other things going on, writing related and not, Emily and I got behind on photo scanning for our book project. Several people have already loaned us historical pictures for Images Of America: Albion and Noble County, and we spent some time working on them this morning … so we can get more later!
One of the photos we have is of a female daredevil who met with a tragic accident a hundred years ago on Albion’s courthouse square. She was taken to a nearby hospital where she died. That hospital later became a dentist office downstairs, and an apartment upstairs … and I lived in that apartment for a time. Connections like that make local history even more interesting for me. (And a little spooky.)
One of the photos we have is of a female daredevil who met with a tragic accident a hundred years ago on Albion’s courthouse square. She was taken to a nearby hospital where she died. That hospital later became a dentist office downstairs, and an apartment upstairs … and I lived in that apartment for a time. Connections like that make local history even more interesting for me. (And a little spooky.)
November 2, 2014
Get Kracken and Release the Presses
What does a real, official writer’s press release look like? Well … I don’t know. But here’s the press release I sent out to the local media, minus my e-mail address and author photograph. Obviously it’s different from my less formal post from last week, but otherwise all I can tell you is that it’s probably too long for modern media outfits.
Oh, if you have Facebook and want to let us know you’re coming, the event page is at https://www.facebook.com/events/35982.... Or, you could just let us know you’re coming.
Local author Mark R Hunter is visiting the Noble County Public Library’s main branch in Albion for a book signing Monday, November 17th.
Hunter’s diverse works include two romantic comedy novels, a young adult adventure, a collection of short stories, and a history of the Albion Fire Department, in addition to a humor piece in the anthology My Funny Valentine. Two of his works came out in 2014:
The Notorious Ian Grant, a romantic comedy set in northeast Indiana, came out in August and is a sequel to his first novel, Storm Chaser. Both were published, along with his e-book short story collection, Storm Chaser Shorts, by Whiskey Creek Press
The No-Campfire Girls, a humorous adventure set in an Indiana summer camp, was released in June. Some of the proceeds go toward operating costs for Camp Latonka, a Missouri Girl Scout camp that once provided a second home for Hunter’s wife, Emily.
Proceeds from Hunter’s other book, Smoky Days and Sleepless Nights: A Century or So With The Albion Fire Department, go toward the Albion Fire Department.
Copies of all the books will be available for sale at the book signing, which will run from 3-6 p.m. and include some reduced prices. You can find out more about Hunter and his books at www.markrhunter.com, or on his Amazon author’s page at http://www.amazon.com/Mark-R-Hunter/e...
Oh, if you have Facebook and want to let us know you’re coming, the event page is at https://www.facebook.com/events/35982.... Or, you could just let us know you’re coming.
Local author Mark R Hunter is visiting the Noble County Public Library’s main branch in Albion for a book signing Monday, November 17th.
Hunter’s diverse works include two romantic comedy novels, a young adult adventure, a collection of short stories, and a history of the Albion Fire Department, in addition to a humor piece in the anthology My Funny Valentine. Two of his works came out in 2014:
The Notorious Ian Grant, a romantic comedy set in northeast Indiana, came out in August and is a sequel to his first novel, Storm Chaser. Both were published, along with his e-book short story collection, Storm Chaser Shorts, by Whiskey Creek Press
The No-Campfire Girls, a humorous adventure set in an Indiana summer camp, was released in June. Some of the proceeds go toward operating costs for Camp Latonka, a Missouri Girl Scout camp that once provided a second home for Hunter’s wife, Emily.
Proceeds from Hunter’s other book, Smoky Days and Sleepless Nights: A Century or So With The Albion Fire Department, go toward the Albion Fire Department.
Copies of all the books will be available for sale at the book signing, which will run from 3-6 p.m. and include some reduced prices. You can find out more about Hunter and his books at www.markrhunter.com, or on his Amazon author’s page at http://www.amazon.com/Mark-R-Hunter/e...
October 29, 2014
A Farewell To Mark
With mixed feelings I say goodbye to my first writing home, in the same week my column appears for the first time in Kendallville Mall. I’m going from a weekly to a monthly, but otherwise you’ll get pretty much the same stuff in the new “Slightly Off The Mark” … like it or not.
SLIGHTLY OFF THE MARK
When I started this column I was a green, snot-nosed kid, which was probably just allergies. Maybe a virus. Today I take medicine and always have Kleenex nearby, so I think I’m a better person, or at least more hygienic.
Today it’s twenty-three years later, and this is my last humor column in the New Era, Churubusco News, and Northwest News. It’s the end of what was once a—ahem—new era, and I’m poorer for it.
I’m also grateful that the papers’ new owners have allowed me this chance to say farewell to you, the readers, the people who shared my ride of child-rearing, home maintenance, misbehaving pets, and exploding lawn mowers. This has been my best job ever, and if I’d had a choice I’d probably have gone on doing it until they pried my cold fingers from the keyboard.
This is my love letter to you, the readers, and a thank you to the crews of the three newspapers that made me feel wanted all those years. Love letter is just an expression, by the way, so don’t expect chocolate … or jewelry. Definitely not jewelry.
I sent articles to the New Era for a quarter of a century, everything from accident reports to features to movie reviews. In February, 1991, they began printing my humor column, and later it also appeared in the Churubusco News and Northwest News. Back then I had more hair, less weight, and no gray.
Let me grab a calculator … taking into consideration the occasional reprints and my poor math skills, we published over 50 columns a year. That’s 1,150 columns, each up to 1,000 words long, although they were getting shorter. That’s one million, one hundred fifty thousand words.
My last novel clocked in at around 60,000 words. So I wrote 19 books worth of “Slightly Off The Mark” … 14 of them good books. Including the five actual books I’ve written, that’s more words than J.K. Rowling and Stephanie Myer combined. Not that I’d combine them.
That doesn’t include over two dozen columns that remain unpublished. Paranoid of missing a deadline, I wrote two or three new columns whenever a vacation approached. I’d write even more as winter neared, fearing I’d fall into a cold weather funk and lose my comic edge. Some would say that effort didn’t help.
While I look for writing opportunities elsewhere, I’m also putting those unused columns together into a book, which you could say is my present to the readers, along with that love letter. Except you’d have to pay for it … it’s a paid present. It’s like getting something from the government for “free”. Here’s one last book plug, then: those unused columns will be the nucleus of a book entitled, yes, “Slightly Off The Mark”. You’ll be updated on that at my blog of the helpfully same name, and at my www.markrhunter.com website.
Meanwhile, I’ll still be around. I’m still an Albionite, and love this area, and I’m not going anywhere pending a retirement somewhere south. Unless I get hired by Hawaii Today as their resident beach reporter, of course. It would be tragic, but a guy’s gotta write.
Meanwhile, it’s easy to forget that the Albion New Era has been around since—wait for it—1872. Yeah. The Churubusco News and Northwest News also predate my connection with them. Small town newspapers are the backbone of the people, people. Okay, actually backbones are the backbone of the people, but newspapers are the backbone of a community, right up there with schools, volunteers, and the gossip grapevine.
What I’m saying is that these newspapers have changed before, they’re changing now, and they’ll change again sometime in the future. My column was part of the great circle of newsprint, fertilized with ink, and the analogy pretty much falls apart there … but in its absence I hope you’ll continue to support your local newspaper (and buy my books, cause, you know—always be closing).
Who knows? Maybe, like that guy in Halloween, I’ll pop up again when you least expect it. I mean, in a less scary way. I’m still doing press stuff for various organizations, after all.
Take care, good luck, and farewell. As for me, I’ll do just fine. After all, as I said at the end of my very first column, in 1991:
“Well, why not? I just made a whole column out of columns, didn’t I?”
SLIGHTLY OFF THE MARK
When I started this column I was a green, snot-nosed kid, which was probably just allergies. Maybe a virus. Today I take medicine and always have Kleenex nearby, so I think I’m a better person, or at least more hygienic.
Today it’s twenty-three years later, and this is my last humor column in the New Era, Churubusco News, and Northwest News. It’s the end of what was once a—ahem—new era, and I’m poorer for it.
I’m also grateful that the papers’ new owners have allowed me this chance to say farewell to you, the readers, the people who shared my ride of child-rearing, home maintenance, misbehaving pets, and exploding lawn mowers. This has been my best job ever, and if I’d had a choice I’d probably have gone on doing it until they pried my cold fingers from the keyboard.
This is my love letter to you, the readers, and a thank you to the crews of the three newspapers that made me feel wanted all those years. Love letter is just an expression, by the way, so don’t expect chocolate … or jewelry. Definitely not jewelry.
I sent articles to the New Era for a quarter of a century, everything from accident reports to features to movie reviews. In February, 1991, they began printing my humor column, and later it also appeared in the Churubusco News and Northwest News. Back then I had more hair, less weight, and no gray.
Let me grab a calculator … taking into consideration the occasional reprints and my poor math skills, we published over 50 columns a year. That’s 1,150 columns, each up to 1,000 words long, although they were getting shorter. That’s one million, one hundred fifty thousand words.
My last novel clocked in at around 60,000 words. So I wrote 19 books worth of “Slightly Off The Mark” … 14 of them good books. Including the five actual books I’ve written, that’s more words than J.K. Rowling and Stephanie Myer combined. Not that I’d combine them.
That doesn’t include over two dozen columns that remain unpublished. Paranoid of missing a deadline, I wrote two or three new columns whenever a vacation approached. I’d write even more as winter neared, fearing I’d fall into a cold weather funk and lose my comic edge. Some would say that effort didn’t help.
While I look for writing opportunities elsewhere, I’m also putting those unused columns together into a book, which you could say is my present to the readers, along with that love letter. Except you’d have to pay for it … it’s a paid present. It’s like getting something from the government for “free”. Here’s one last book plug, then: those unused columns will be the nucleus of a book entitled, yes, “Slightly Off The Mark”. You’ll be updated on that at my blog of the helpfully same name, and at my www.markrhunter.com website.
Meanwhile, I’ll still be around. I’m still an Albionite, and love this area, and I’m not going anywhere pending a retirement somewhere south. Unless I get hired by Hawaii Today as their resident beach reporter, of course. It would be tragic, but a guy’s gotta write.
Meanwhile, it’s easy to forget that the Albion New Era has been around since—wait for it—1872. Yeah. The Churubusco News and Northwest News also predate my connection with them. Small town newspapers are the backbone of the people, people. Okay, actually backbones are the backbone of the people, but newspapers are the backbone of a community, right up there with schools, volunteers, and the gossip grapevine.
What I’m saying is that these newspapers have changed before, they’re changing now, and they’ll change again sometime in the future. My column was part of the great circle of newsprint, fertilized with ink, and the analogy pretty much falls apart there … but in its absence I hope you’ll continue to support your local newspaper (and buy my books, cause, you know—always be closing).
Who knows? Maybe, like that guy in Halloween, I’ll pop up again when you least expect it. I mean, in a less scary way. I’m still doing press stuff for various organizations, after all.
Take care, good luck, and farewell. As for me, I’ll do just fine. After all, as I said at the end of my very first column, in 1991:
“Well, why not? I just made a whole column out of columns, didn’t I?”
October 28, 2014
Introducing my new old column
Emily’s working hard to get the “Slightly Off The Mark” book ready to go before Christmas, but meanwhile … there’s my new job to announce.
My weekly humor column, orphaned after being dropped from its former newspapers, will now appear monthly in the Kendallville Mall. A go-to place for local ads and coupons, Kendallville Mall is also changing its direction, to feature local and Midwest writers in a kind of monthly feature setup. There’s a good possibility I’ll also be part of Julie Scher’s growing efforts in the area of internet video and social media services.
In other words, someday sooner than you think, you might be watching my column. Imagine the possibilities! I leave it to Julie to give you more information on that as it develops, but meanwhile the Kendallville Mall’s Facebook Page is here:
https://www.facebook.com/kendallville...
Check there to get lots more information about what they do, and watch for me in your mailboxes (which isn’t creepy at all), or at places such as the box outside Albion Village Foods. Support those who support me! My column will appear on my blog a week after it’s in Kendallville Mall.
My weekly humor column, orphaned after being dropped from its former newspapers, will now appear monthly in the Kendallville Mall. A go-to place for local ads and coupons, Kendallville Mall is also changing its direction, to feature local and Midwest writers in a kind of monthly feature setup. There’s a good possibility I’ll also be part of Julie Scher’s growing efforts in the area of internet video and social media services.
In other words, someday sooner than you think, you might be watching my column. Imagine the possibilities! I leave it to Julie to give you more information on that as it develops, but meanwhile the Kendallville Mall’s Facebook Page is here:
https://www.facebook.com/kendallville...
Check there to get lots more information about what they do, and watch for me in your mailboxes (which isn’t creepy at all), or at places such as the box outside Albion Village Foods. Support those who support me! My column will appear on my blog a week after it’s in Kendallville Mall.
