David M. Brown's Blog, page 109
October 6, 2011
Game Review #32: Nebulon
In 2009 I began working with Mrs B on her website www.femalegamers.co.uk reviewing the latest console games. Sadly, our other commitments meant the website couldn't continue and we brought it to an end early in 2010. I'll be using this blog to review all the games, recent and not so recent, that I encounter. With Mrs B's kind permission, I'll also be posting some of the reviews I previously worked on, so don't panic if they refer to previous years and months.
Nebulon (2009) (Xbox 360)
If Nebulon had been released back in the eighties it would have been just another example of the dawn of gaming. Releasing a game with a simple – even one dimensional – concept today could easily have been perceived as foolhardy but Dark Omen Games were clearly not swayed and the gamble has more than paid off.
The idea of Nebulon is refreshingly straightforward. Taking place in a grid, you pilot a small but sophisticated spaceship and face a variety of enemy vessels whose only motivation is blowing you out of the stars. The more enemy ships you destroy the more challenging the game becomes but you can call on a delightful arsenal to keep any new threats at bay. In a nutshell that is Nebulon, which on the face of it may not seem like anything special, but once you delve in you will be pleasantly surprised.
Nebulon begins simply with enemy vessels appearing as small, slow moving dots that are easy to pick off. The game changes as your skill level increases so once you've gunned down enough standard ships they will move onto the next level, changing shape and difficulty to keep you constantly on your toes. As your enemies improve you will need to respond by enhancing your weapons. To do so you will need to collect power ups left strewn across the cosmos by destroyed enemy vessels. When you have gathered enough power ups you will be able to take your guns to the next level, improving speed, quantity and range of your gunfire
Nebulon is very much a test of endurance. The grid will become overcrowded with enemy vessels if your shooting is not up to scratch but being too trigger happy will quickly reduce the energy of your guns so a balance has to be maintained. Improving your weapons is the way forward but it is possible to get by with a standard gun though you'll have to resort to some breathtaking manoeuvres to avoid the waves of enemies. Thankfully, these are easy to perform and enhance Nebulon's addictive gameplay.
The one drawback to Nebulon is its one dimensional nature will not suit all gamers. If you are looking for variety or an engaging story then this is not for you. Having said that Nebulon requires only 200 Xbox Live points to obtain, which amounts to less than £2.00, so this is an absolute bargain for what's on offer.
Nebulon is a thoroughly addictive shooter boasting an impressive cosmic backdrop, gorgeous explosions more akin to an extravagant fireworks display and a complementary soundtrack that doesn't intrude on the action. Be warned: once you start playing, you'll struggle to stop.
Final Score: 80%
* Previously published on www.femalegamers.co.uk
October 3, 2011
Film Review #96: Paul Blart: Mall Cop
With prices for cinema tickets now reaching ridiculous heights it's not often I will treat myself to a new release unless it's something I simply cannot wait for. Instead, I'm happy to content myself with a cheap DVD or a film on TV which may have slipped through my critical net and, believe me, there have been far too many. Whether the films featured here are recent or old I'll still be providing my honest opinion on them and, with the benefit of hindsight in many cases, may offer a slightly different take to contemporary reviewers.
Paul Blart: Mall Cop (2009)
Heroes come in all shapes and sizes and in Steve Carr's Paul Blart we have an overweight and lonely mall cop who is regarded as something of a joke in his place of work but an unexpected robbery allows him to shine. This is a well-used formula for a film but how does Paul Blart fare?
The story focuses, unsurprisingly, on mall cop Paul Blart (Kevin James) who dreams of joining the New Jersey State Police but frequently fails the training due to his hypoglycaemia. Blart spends his days working as a security guard at the mall, patrolling the walkways on his Segway PT, while at home he has a concerned mother Margaret (Shirley Knight) and daughter Maya (Raini Rodriguez) who want nothing more than for him to meet a woman. Blart soon meets and falls for Amy (Jayma Mays) who sells wigs at the mall and is friendly with him but chances of romance seem slim. Blart also has to supervise a newcomer to the security department Veck (Keir O'Donnell) and train him to do his job properly, unlike the rest of Blart's colleagues. Dismissed as a loner and joke, Blart is given the chance to come to the fore when a group of robbers infiltrate the mall and hold a small group of staff, including Amy, hostage!
The film begins with Blart's latest attempt to negotiate a training course at New Jersey State Police but just when it looks like he's going to do it, Blart's hypoglycaemia causes him to collapse. We're soon given an image of Blart's everyday life, enjoying meals with his worried mother and daughter and losing himself in the working day. While Blart patrols the mall his colleagues sit back in their office and idly watch security cameras, enjoying earning money for doing as little work as possible. Taking the newcomer, Veck, under his wing Blart shows the rookie the ropes and on his latest patrol spots Amy. It is love at first sight and Blart resorts to some less than subtle tactics to draw her attention. Amy seems to respond quite positively to his advances and even invites him to a bar at the mall where many of the other staff are in attendance. Amy is delighted to see Blart turn up but he accidentally breaks his own rule about drinking alcohol and ends up assaulting a singer on stage before crashing through the nearest window. It's nothing short of embarrassing.
Blart's drunken antics augment his reputation as something of an outcast and fool but things become very serious when a group of robbers take the likes of Veck and Amy hostage at the mall bank. Their group are heavily armed and purveyors of martial arts and acrobatics on skateboards, tearing through the mall in their pursuit of credit card codes from the respective shops. While the mall is being evacuated, Blart is preoccupied strutting his stuff at the arcades on Rock Band and the music is so loud he doesn't hear anyone trying to alert him to danger. Once Blart realises what is going on he has to take on the robbers himself while the police gather outside to see if he can stop the robbery and save the girl, the traditional Hollywood style storyline but most heroes are not like Blart.
Paul Blart is very funny in places, that fall through the window in the pub being among the highlights, but his efforts in tackling the robbers is brilliant too. Try not laughing as Blart moves from the cover of pillars and always mistimes his advances. It's predictable that Blart will prevail in the end but it's not straightforward and you'll have some laughs as he only just keeps it together in tackling the bad guys. You wouldn't consider this to be the greatest comedy ever made but as light entertainment it should satisfy many audiences. Critically reviled on its release, the public responded well and made it a big box office success.
Paul Blart is a pretty good comedy about the loner who is a given the chance to show the world that there is a lot more to him than meets the eye. Somewhat predictable there are plenty of laughs and some decent performances that will make for a good night's entertainment. Worth considering.
Verdict: 7½/10
September 30, 2011
Film Review #95 : Open Water 2: Adrift
With prices for cinema tickets now reaching ridiculous heights it's not often I will treat myself to a new release unless it's something I simply cannot wait for. Instead, I'm happy to content myself with a cheap DVD or a film on TV which may have slipped through my critical net and, believe me, there have been far too many. Whether the films featured here are recent or old I'll still be providing my honest opinion on them and, with the benefit of hindsight in many cases, may offer a slightly different take to contemporary reviewers.
Open Water 2: Adrift (2006)
Some films are sent to test us and when I saw Open Water (2003) I had found one such film. Having a group of people stranded at sea for the duration of a film is a difficult theme to maintain any interest with, though Reef (2010) wasn't too bad. Along came Adrift to offer another test so Mrs B and I found our sea legs and summoned enough courage to face a sort of sequel to Open Water.
The film focuses on a group of friends from high school – couple Amy (Susan May Pratt) and James (Richard Speight Jr) who bring along their baby Sarah, Zach (Niklaus Lange) and Lauren (Ali Hillis), and Dan (Eric Dane) and his latest girlfriend Michelle (Cameron Richardson). Dan has planned a weekend away on his yacht, which is actually owned by his boss but he pretends to be rich and successful in front of his friends. After stopping in the middle of the ocean James, Zach, Lauren and Michelle head into the water leaving Dan, Amy and baby Sarah on board. Lamenting the high school days when he was in love with Amy, Dan quickly switches from a serious chat to a bit of a prank. He lifts Amy into his arms and jumps off the yacht with her, not taking into consideration her reluctance to go into the water, a childhood fear brought about by the loss of her father. Only when everyone is in the ocean do they realise they have forgotten to put the ladder down and are now unable to climb back onto the yacht. With baby Sarah crying for her mother, the group are faced with a desperate struggle for survival out in the open water!
The film was only labelled Open Water 2 to cash in on the original which was somehow a box office success though I'm losing sleep trying to figure out how! Adrift addresses a very ludicrous concept what with this group of friends all going for a swim and not one querying how and where they get back on board once they've had enough of swimming. Dan not owning the yacht is cited as the reason he gets a bit forgetful when it comes to letting the ladder down but even then he declines to ask Amy why she doesn't want to swim and why she wears a life vest even though she's safely on board the yacht. Instead Dan assumes it will be funny to force Amy into the water and very soon he regrets his actions as the group can find no means of getting back on the yacht. While Amy has a very handy life vest, the rest of the group are left to share two diving masks, a knife and a dolphin float. As the full horror of their predicament takes hold the group begins to turn on each other.
I'd known the premise to Adrift long before seeing the film and thought it sounded ridiculous. The film did nothing to change that initial perception I have to say. Our friends try many devious solutions to getting out of their predicament such as stabbing the side of the yacht to create a makeshift handhold only for Dan to scupper the plans, wanting to keep the yacht in good shape before he returns it to his boss! Nice to know he has his priorities right! Another plan is for the friends to remove their clothes and tie them together to form a rope of sorts. After managing to secure the clothes around a handrail on the yacht the friends opt to allow Dan to try and make the ascension rather than one of the three women who are clearly lighter than the men. The plan doesn't work of course and with options running out things become desperate. With a knife being shared amongst the group blood is eventually shed when James has to dive down to retrieve the knife but once he grabs it he is quite deep down and in need of air. Swimming frantically for the surface James smacks his head against the yacht and is left with a fractured skull, which is bad enough but the group end up destroying the dolphin float as well leaving Amy as the only one not having to tread water to stay afloat!
Adrift suffers in many areas. Once again we have a group of characters who are not remotely interesting. Amy has a chilling past which explains her fear of water but other than that there isn't much to these characters. Despite blood being in the water there are no sharks in this film unlike Open Water and Reef so the only harm that can come to these friends is from themselves. Incidentally, they're all surprisingly fit and healthy, managing to tread water for many hours without having to rest very often. Personally, I still couldn't see why the group couldn't stand one person on another's shoulders and push them up the yacht but I'm not paid to write scripts so I'll not take that point any further. Much has been made of the film's ambiguous ending and though Mrs B and I devoted perhaps two minutes of discussion to what the hell it all means, we'd soon moved onto better things. Reef is still by far the best of these stranded at sea films I've watched in recent years and even that wasn't astounding. If you want a thriller that takes place in the remote sea then head back in time to watch Dead Calm (1989).
Adrift is a very poor attempt at a survival drama, offering us a group of less than absorbing characters without one brain cell between them and a very silly plot. I'm not an expert on yachts but surely a ladder built on the side of the vessel would prevent such incidents as depicted in this film. That's a debate for another time. As for this debate there's nothing to discuss: this film is utterly awful.
Verdict: 1/10
September 27, 2011
Film Review #94: A Matter of Life and Death
With prices for cinema tickets now reaching ridiculous heights it's not often I will treat myself to a new release unless it's something I simply cannot wait for. Instead, I'm happy to content myself with a cheap DVD or a film on TV which may have slipped through my critical net and, believe me, there have been far too many. Whether the films featured here are recent or old I'll still be providing my honest opinion on them and, with the benefit of hindsight in many cases, may offer a slightly different take to contemporary reviewers.
A Matter of Life and Death (1946)
The afterlife has been depicted many times in films and back in the 1940s we were provided with not just an image of the heavens but of a mix-up that proves the transition from life to death is not always straightforward. Acclaimed as one of the best British films ever made, I was fascinated to see for myself just why A Matter of Life and Death is so widely renowned.
The film begins with pilot Peter Carter (David Niven) trying to steer his wounded Lancaster bomber home. One member of his crew lays dead in the plane while the others have managed to parachute to safety leaving Peter alone with his own parachute destroyed. Knowing death is certain Peter manages to contact an American radio operator who is based in England, June (Kim Hunter). Peter devotes his last few minutes to a conversation with June and declares his regret that he will never meet her before hurling himself from the plane, preferring to fall to his death rather than be burned alive. Though Peter should have died in the crash he wakes on a beach to find he is very much alive. As luck would have it he has landed close to the base where June works and the two soon meet and fall in love. However, Peter is visited by Conductor 71 (Marius Goring) who explains his mistake allowed Peter to cheat death and that the pilot must now head for the afterlife. Peter refuses and demands an appeal to the powers that be. Peter's stance leads to a trial in the afterlife where a jury must decide whether to allow Peter to cheat death and be with the woman he loves or separate the two lovers and bring Peter to the afterlife.
The opening to A Matter of Life and Death was very familiar and I have seen the odd spoof of the cockpit scene on comedies. Peter first speaks from his burning plane to June and despite her just being a voice on the radio he is immediately transfixed. Their conversation is only brief what with Peter being on borrowed time but once he wakes to find he is alive, he soon finds June and love blossoms. Peter finding her so quick and the two immediately falling for each other may stretch the credulity a little but it's integral to the story. Conductor 71, whose attire is of an aristocrat from the French Revolution, visits Peter and explains that when he tried to find the pilot his view was obscured across the English Channel by thick fog and therefore he missed Peter. Having cheated death Peter is asked to take his place in the afterlife but he is unmoved by Conductor 71's error and insists on an appeal. Peter is given three days to prepare his case and choose a representative from history to argue on his behalf. A twist of events sees Doctor Reeves (Roger Livesey) representing Peter in an epic trial that is attended by thousands.
The trial itself is the highlight of the film and is interposed with the image of Peter in hospital undergoing an operation on his brain while a tearful June looks on. Doctor Reeves comes up against a fierce prosecutor in the form of American Abraham Farlan (Raymond Massey) who in life was killed by the British in the American Revolutionary War and is naturally biased against the appeal for Peter's life. Even each member of the jury are in opposition to everything British so Dr Reeves appears to have his work cut out until he makes arrangements to change the jury members and make the trial somewhat fairer. Once all the key players are in place, including the imposing Judge (Abraham Sofaer), we are left with an engaging debate about whether Peter should be allowed to continue his life having been a victim of an unfortunate error by Conductor 71. Peter's romance with June becomes the focal point of the trial and the powers that be have to decide whether to relent in their convictions all because of love or to cruelly separate the lovers.
A Matter of Life and Death takes inspiration from The Wizard of Oz in being filmed partly in colour and partly in black and white. Peter's time with June is in colour but the images of the afterlife are shaded in black and white which provides a nice contrast. This is the traditional film where love takes precedence over everything else and can overcome any challenge. Peter and June's romance may seem far-fetched in how quickly it develops but Niven and Hunter give the love story some real substance and are ably supported by the rest of the cast with Livesey and, in particular, Massey being the highlights for me as they slugged it out in the celestial court. It's predictable how the film will turn out but seeing all the difficulties the characters go through in reaching that climax is more than worth it.
A Matter of Life and Death is a very good concept where the heavens have messed up in delivering someone to the afterlife and rather than dismiss Peter's pleas they give him the chance of justice. This is an effective love story with some good effects and set pieces considering the film's age and a rich cast round off what is a rewarding experience.
Verdict: 8/10
September 24, 2011
Cat Observations #12
In 2009 Mrs B and I adopted two brothers, Razz and Kain, from the RSPCA. It was my first experience of cat ownership having grown up either with a dog or goldfish in the house, the latter in a tank, of course, and not just in some innocuous location like the sofa or kitchen table. Since Razz and Kain joined the family we have also adopted two kittens, Buggles and Charlie, and two Norwegian Forest cats, Bilbo and Frodo, so you could say it's quite full in our household now. Though Mrs B knew what to expect, having previously owned both dogs and cats, it has been a steep learning curve for me and my lessons are still not over. In this blog I want to share some of the weird and wonderful antics I have discovered in the feline world, which is much different to the kingdom of dogs where obedience is paramount. A cat's motto seems to be, "I do what I please, so deal with it, you moron."
[image error] Looks innocent enough, doesn't he? Don't be fooled!
Who Goes There? Friend or Foe?
Living with six cats is like starring in Mad Max on a daily basis such is the chaos and constant carnage this dirty half dozen wield. While Mrs B and I now know them well enough and how they're going to behave (well, most of the time!), what we can't predict is how they apply themselves when strangers come to the house.
I say strangers, what I mean is anyone that visits our humble abode. Family and friends do pop round infrequently but every time it's something of a mystery as to whether we'll get through the occasion without any incidents. A few months ago we had the ultimate test in the form of a police officer! He wasn't visiting to arrest any of the six cats, which surprised me, but Mrs B and I had asked for the law to pop round for another matter. Anyway, the humble officer arrived and sidestepped our cats before we offered him a seat in the best chair in the house. Well, when it's the law you don't want to upset them in any fashion do you? While the officer was taking notes our youngest cat – Charlie – who is incidentally the most assertive decided it would be a good idea to climb on the police officer's legs. I hold my breath when I walk past police officers, worried I may get pulled up for small misdemeanour, so imagine my shock and trepidation when Charlie proceeded to climb all over the police officer without a care in the world! I managed to regain my composure long enough to snatch the little sod away and allow the officer to continue with his notes. We struggled through the exchange but thankfully there was no caution from the officer.
Charlie tends to be at the centre of any incidents we have. We're good friends with one of our neighbours at the top of the street and whenever he visits Charlie is more animated than ever. I'm convinced he's wanting to leave Mrs B and I behind and go and live with the neighbour. Thankfully, it hasn't happened yet! Razz is also an assertive one when it comes to the neighbours. We live next door to a lovely couple and one day I was chatting to the lady and she told me not only does so she see Razz and Kain about the neighbourhood but she has Razz come into her house, specifically into the kitchen! Of all our cats Razz is the one who is particularly partial to food and I was immediately suspicious of how much extra he's getting in his daily ration all thanks to the generous neighbour!
I'm sure you'll be intrigued by the worst thing that has ever happened to one of our visitors! Well, apart from my mother having her clothes gently clawed, the worst incident befell my wife's stepmother. Her and my father in law were round and the four of us had decided to have fish and chips. This is a dangerous business as I found out the first night we had young Buggles and I also had fish and chips. In a nanosecond he went from sitting and watching me to hurling himself onto my plate and dragging half of my meal (including ALL of the fish) onto the carpet! No such incidents occurred with our visitors but we did notice Razz hovering around everyone's feet. He isn't the most subtle when we're eating our meals, trying to get on our knees for a closer look or even reaching for our dinner plates! On this occasion he'd fixed his sights on my wife's step mother and immediately sat by her looking innocent. Without warning he suddenly reached up and clawed at the fish on her plate! Thankfully, he didn't manage to claim the prize but I think the fish was less appealing having been clawed by Razz.
Every time we have a visit now I've become accustomed to cold sweats, heart palpitations and shredded nerves. I keep thinking about hanging up a sign outside the house saying "May the Lord have mercy on all ye who enter here!" but I don't think Mrs B would approve. Our house is becoming somewhat notorious to strangers though, especially the postman who has delivered letters to usand found dead mice and birds lying on the doorstep, like some sort of sacrifice to the cat gods! Hopefully he doesn't believe the same fate will befall him but given the unpredictable nature of our six cats I would never reassure him of his safety. I don't like to lie to people, you see!
September 21, 2011
Film Review #93: Zombieland
With prices for cinema tickets now reaching ridiculous heights it's not often I will treat myself to a new release unless it's something I simply cannot wait for. Instead, I'm happy to content myself with a cheap DVD or a film on TV which may have slipped through my critical net and, believe me, there have been far too many. Whether the films featured here are recent or old I'll still be providing my honest opinion on them and, with the benefit of hindsight in many cases, may offer a slightly different take to contemporary reviewers.
Zombieland (2009)
There seems to be a new zombie film every year at the moment which means even greater pressure to churn out something with a degree of originality. Ruben Fleischer's Zombieland promised to be a horror comedy and immediately my thoughts drifted to Shaun of the Dead (2004), which has lost none of its appeal. My hopes were that Zombieland would be a comedy equal if not better than the British classic.
The film follows the progress of student Columbus (Jesse Eisenberg) who is one of a few survivors of a disease that has swept across America and turned the majority of people into zombies. Travelling across a largely desolate America, Columbus is heading to Columbus, Ohio (where else?) to see if his parents are still alive. He hooks up with Tallahasse (Woody Harrelson) who is on a mission to locate the world's last Twinkie, and sisters Wichita (Emma Stone) and Little Rock (Abigail Breslin) who are heading west for the Pacific Playland Amusement Park. With personal differences, the quartet makes a road trip through the zombie-infested land in pursuit of their mutual goals but do they make it?
We begin with the company of Columbus who has survived the zombie apocalypse thanks to a series of rules he has compiled which are displayed frequently on screen as our unorthodox hero bumbles his way from one catastrophe to another. Such rules as checking the back seat of your car for zombies, not being a hero even when temptation threatens to cloud your reason, and the very important double-tap used on felled zombies to make sure they definitely are dead. Columbus is a loner, finding sanctuary in his home and in World of Warcraft but the arrival of the zombies leaves him with no choice but to set out on the road. His encounter with Tallahasse is your classic comedy combo with the shy student being anxiously verbose while his battle-hardened friend looks like he might snap at any moment, his obsession for Twinkies being the only thing of any importance to him. Throughout the film you'll enjoy some great set-pieces such as highways with abandoned cars, seemingly empty supermarkets with isolated zombies waiting to pounce and even a trip to Bill Murray's house for good measure!
Columbus and Tallahasse's encounter with Wichita and Little Rock exposes their frailties as they are twice duped by the sisters, having their guns and car stolen after the first meeting before falling once again for the girls' trap and being taken hostage! Despite the danger Columbus cannot help but fall for Wichita who is initially dismissive of him but soon finds herself developing feelings for him too. Each of the four characters are somewhat lost souls. Columbus' love of solitude and his struggle to bond with anyone makes him a sympathetic but foolish hero. For all his toughness, Tallahasse is in mourning for his dog that was a victim of the zombie attacks, which may sound silly to some people but comes across as quite poignant. Wichita and Little Rock have had to grow up fast and only have each other to rely on which makes them initially suspicious of Columbus and Tallahasse but the quartet soon find they can work well together.
Zombieland begins well and doesn't let up, managing to be both very funny and entertaining as our heroes and heroines face off against the zombie horde. The undoubted highlight of the film was them reaching Hollywood and heading for the seemingly deserted mansion of Bill Murray. That in itself was a cool idea but then Bill makes an appearance himself and it's a memorable cameo from the comedy legend. Of course our quartet settle their differences in the end and you'll find few surprises with the "will they, won't they" scenario between Columbus and Wichita but the film does contain some surprises, notably details of Tallahasse's tragic past. Do the group survive the zombie attacks in the end though? Does Bill Murray get through it alive? Does Tallahasse find that fabled last Twinkie? So many questions and it's great fun finding out the answers. Eisenberg makes for a confident lead, Murray's cameo is most welcome, Stone and Breslin offer good support, but Harrelson is a revelation as Tallahasse and simply steals the film from everyone else.
Zombieland is a funny and action-packed horror comedy with a good cast, memorable set pieces and enough zombies to satisfy the fussiest of zombie fanatics. I still prefer Shaun of the Dead but this turns out to be a very different film and one with many qualities of its own.
Verdict: 9/10
September 18, 2011
In Search of Inspiration – The Journey of the Writing Pilgrim #7
In January 2011 I sent the Writing Pilgrim out on a worldwide journey in search of ideas and inspiration for stories, novels and blogs. I would have liked to make the journey myself but I'm not a rich man and I have a wife and four cats that need me, a blog to maintain and novels and short stories to write so my hands are a bit tied. The Writing Pilgrim is a free spirit, travelling on the crest of a creative wave and looking to experience the world in a lifelong journey he has long wanted to take. Whatever insights he can share I hope you'll look forward to as much as me.
A Very Special Local Brew
Guten Tag Dave! Yes, would you believe it, after my visit to Iceland I've headed south, ignored you and the UK, headed over the Channel and found myself in Germany. This is a great country with a lot of history. You'll probably be thinking "I hope he doesn't mention the war!" but I honestly believe the German people have moved on, unlike some of our compatriots in the UK.
My journey into Germany (that's almost a rhyme!) led me into the west and to the majestic city of Cologne (Koln) that sits on the banks of the Rhine. After landing at the airport I hopped onto a train and unbelievably got the correct one. Emerging in the heart of Cologne I wasn't sure what to expect but the first thing that greeted me was the gigantic Dom Cathedral. I couldn't appreciate the wonder of this architectural masterpiece at first. I arrived at night and although the cathedral looked impressive it wasn't until the following day that I really fell in love with it as I watched the sun's rays basking on its surface.
You can easily get lost in the number of museums that Cologne has to offer and I felt it was a good point in my journey to take my time and really enjoy this city. Art museums are prevalent in Cologne as well as some of your usual historical ones. The most moving aspect of the museums for me was the insistence on not denying the events of World War II. The German people are open and honest about their part in that terrible war and it is this sincerity which I admired greatly in them. They have learned to move on from the past though it's something they'll clearly never forget. Even if they wanted to, many other nations would keep reminding them. It's sad really. Surely time all of us looked to the future now and treated each other with respect.
I must have put two stone on here in Cologne, Dave. I have fallen in love with German food which is very filling for any tourist but I'm constantly eating more than I should. Don't get me started on the cafes they have here with their extravagant ice cream desserts. Every time I pass one I know I shouldn't but I end up taking a seat and waiting for my order to be taken. The service in Cologne is top-notch and everyone is really friendly, much more so than back home. Maybe you and I should move out here, Dave. You can bring Donna and the cats. If you won't then I may well do.
The best part of Cologne has surely been the local brew – Kolsh! There are a few variants of this drink but the important thing is it is brewed only in Cologne and served only in Cologne. I can picture a Fight Club scenario with Kolsh e.g. "The first rule of Kolsh club is, you do not drink anything other than Kolsh!" The first pub I went to I had the audacity to ask for something over than Kolsh. I thought the staff were going to chase me out of the establishment with meat cleavers such was the malevolence in their eyes. I recovered the situation by having ten glasses of Kolsh in a row. They're not pint glasses you get but a medium sized glass which doesn't take long to drink. Be on your guard though. If you don't stick a beer mat on top of the glass they'll keep bringing you Kolsh until you're falling off your chair. Marvellous drink, marvellous service, marvellous city, it's all so very…well…marvellous!
I'm bored of writing to you now, Dave. I'm due another Kolsh so while that's on its way let me suggest that you take this beautiful city and use it for Elenchera. I think a city with a very special local brew must be worth considering. I know your Glamadorian elves are wine makers and their trade is later monopolised by the Legantkians. You could start there. What about the Ephetonan dwarves, eh? They're master beer brewers so could they come up with a unique drink. Failing that, why not explore the introduction of wine, beer and other alcohol to the western colonies. I'll leave it up to you.
I'm having a few more glasses of Kolsh at this pub then heading for a stroll along the Rhine. Can you believe Cologne started way back with the Romans? So much history here. I promise I'll move on and keep you updated as to my progress but for now I'm going to enjoy more Kolsh while I can but I promise to steer clear of the cafes. Well, I may pop into one or two more before I leave. Perhaps four or five. I'll see how it goes.
Danke,
W. Pilgrim
September 15, 2011
Film Review #92: Rogue
With prices for cinema tickets now reaching ridiculous heights it's not often I will treat myself to a new release unless it's something I simply cannot wait for. Instead, I'm happy to content myself with a cheap DVD or a film on TV which may have slipped through my critical net and, believe me, there have been far too many. Whether the films featured here are recent or old I'll still be providing my honest opinion on them and, with the benefit of hindsight in many cases, may offer a slightly different take to contemporary reviewers.
Rogue (2007)
Earlier this year I had the misfortune of watching Crocodile (2000), which was simply dire so when faced with a similar film in Rogue my hopes were understandably not high. The difference with this film was it had an impressive looking cast which potentially hinted at something that might actually be quite good. My hopes were that these naive assumptions would prove to be right.
The film follows the progress of American journalist Pete McKell (Michael Vartan) who heads for Australia and decides to join a river cruise looking out for crocodiles. The tour guide Kate Ryan (Radha Mitchell) manages to keep everyone entertained but on the way back down the river one of the tourists notices a distress flare. Kate explains she has to investigate any potential emergency on the river and when the group reach the source of the flare they find a half-sunken boat. Suddenly the tour boat is struck by something in the river and begins taking on water. Kate has no choice but to steer the boat ashore only to find the group are in the territory of one very large crocodile that isn't in the mood for guests, well, not alive anyway!
The storyline for Rogue didn't grip me initially and as it got going I was surprised to find myself thinking this isn't brilliant but it's also not bad either. Kate ends up in charge of a nicely varied tour group including a widowed husband scattering ashes in the river, a couple and their daughter enjoying what might be their last holiday with the suggestion being the wife is terminally ill and, of course, Pete who is somewhat withdrawn and not enjoying his time in Australia but is forced to come to the fore when things get difficult. Another notable character is Neil (Sam Worthington) who pesters the tour group when he passes them on the river only to end up in the same predicament when his boat is taken out by the crocodile. Not only do the tour group face the prospect of a man-eating crocodile they are also not far from nightfall and the water levels are rising.
Rogue makes for a tense film especially when it does get dark and the group desperately try to think of a way out of their predicament. Flares are an option but unfortunately the box has been separated from the boat and now floats on the river. At one point the group decide to attach a rope to a tree on their side of the river and have Neil brave the waters to attach it to another tree on the opposite side, allowing them to bridge the river. It sounds like a good plan but it goes terribly wrong when the first woman to cross comes to a halt and panics, while the father of the close-knit family turns violent, looking out for his wife and daughter at the expense of everyone else. I won't reveal what happens when four people are on the rope at the same time but it isn't pretty. Eventually Pete and Kate become the central focus as the film enters the final reels and the ordeal both of them have to go through is particularly bad. Kate also has a dog called Kevin but I don't want to talk about it!
Rogue offers plenty of blood and gore for horror fanatics and even the crocodile itself isn't guilty of bad effects. Okay it's a pretty big croc but not as ludicrous in size as the one Crocodile had to offer but it's a tad too fond of food considering these reptiles can go for months without eating. Interestingly this crocodile takes bodies back to its lair to be consumed later so I can almost forgive its bloodlust. A couple of other things seem a bit silly such as Neil suggesting he swim to the other side of the river because the crocodile is obviously pre-occupied elsewhere. Neil must be some kind of crocodile whisperer to have come to this conclusion; it's just a pity these hidden skills aren't used more often given how he fares when the crocodile makes a bloody return.
Rogue is a pretty good horror film with a decent cast, a fearsome adversary and a lot of tension. A few moments may make you jump even though it's not the scariest horror film you will ever see but it's a significant improvement on many of the other horror flicks I've had to contend with this year.
Verdict: 7/10
More from The World According to Dave
Film Review #73: Crocodile
Film Review #91: Deadly Swarm
Film Review #75: Splinter
Other reading you may enjoy:
Review: Missing in Mexico – Stuart Gustafson (Book Bags and Cat Naps)
Review: Dominance – Will Lavender (Book Bags and Cat Naps)
Unknown (2011) – Review (Custard)
DVD Review – Julia's Eyes (Custard)
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September 14, 2011
Review: Missing in Mexico – Stuart Gustafson
Stuart Gustafson
Book blurb (): "Missing in Mexico" is Stuart Gustafson's debut mystery tourism novel. Private Investigator Stan W. is hired to find a college freshman who's missing after a family vacation in Los Cabos, Mexico. Even with local help and some promising leads, he's unable to find her and returns home to inform the hurting parents. Months later he receives a mysterious letter and jumps on the next plane to Los Cabos. Will this be the break that he needs to find her? Or will she remain missing – Missing in Mexico?
As America's International Travel Expert™, Stuart Gustafson has flown over 1,000,000 miles to 27 different countries. Come travel with him and learn some of the language as he takes you to the most southern point on Mexico's Baja California peninsula – Los Cabos. Be careful, though, as you might get hooked on the travel, the intriguing story, and the charm of the places where he takes you! And if you like it there, you might want to book your next vacation in Los Cabos – where he spends several weeks each year.
Book review: Missing in Mexico is described as a tourism suspense novel and that's certainly a sub-genre that's new to me; however, Gustafson's writing and clear knowledge of his setting, local customs and the language does make it easy to slip into the novel and feel perfectly at ease with the locations of the book.
Stan Walkorski is a jaded but excellent PI: he's clearly seen too much of the world and its troubles and this has made him a little weary and cynical but conversely has also served to make him excellent at his job. When a young woman disappears in a Mexican airport, Stan has very little to go on, save some patchy information from her parents and best friend. Heading over to Los Cabos is the only way he can get to the heart of the matter.
My knowledge of Spanish, Latin-American or otherwise is basic to say the least but I did enjoy the chapter headers, which consisted of a word, translated and then used in the context of a sentence. For example:
comer (cō·mĕr') – to eat. Quiero comer tacos. I want to eat tacos.
This was a quirky but enjoyable take on the theme of using quotations or chapter headings, which again highlighted Gustafson's knowledge and the authenticity of the information used in the novel.
The story gives you the impression that Stan is following a well travelled path that he's encountered many times before, though it never gets any easier. Although Stan gives very little away about himself, his actions often betray his true feelings and it's clear that at heart he is a good man who just wants to see right done in the world. Unfortunately, you also get the impression that in his line of work it's more likely to see flying pigs. Stan displays a heartwarming touch of vulnerability throughout the novel that makes him even more appealing as a central character.
If you'd have asked me previously if I thought a travel writer, turned novelist could produce a convincing 'tourism suspense' I'd have probably looked at you in confusion and then assumed you were joking but actually this works well. The old adage "write what you know" comes in to play here and Missing in Mexico is a good combination of intriguing story, likeable protagonist and a convincing, well written setting, based on fact and experience. An excellent debut.
Title: Missing in Mexico
Author: Stuart Gustafson
Source: Review copy (PDF) provided by Partners in Crime Tours
Review by Donna Brown
More from The World According to Dave
Film Review #91: Deadly Swarm
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Film Review #66: The Haunting in Connecticut
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Review: My Blood Runs Blue – Stacy Eaton (Book Bags and Cat Naps)
Review: Special Delivery – Lia Fairchild (Book Bags and Cat Naps)
Let Me In – 2010, Review (Custard)
Rose in a Storm by Jon Katz Book Review (tgleichner)
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September 13, 2011
Classic Film Scene #31: My Neighbour Totoro
Great films appear every year and with them are potentially classic scenes that may become more famous than the film itself. The shower scene in Psycho, the chariot race in Ben Hur, the chest bursting moment in Alien, and the opera music sounding across the prison yard in The Shawshank Redemption are just some of the examples of the classic celluloid moments that we may be familiar with even if we've never seen the film. I'll be sharing my favourite film scenes, some you will know others may be unfamiliar, but hopefully they'll be moments you enjoy as much as I do.
My Neighbour Totoro (1988)
Arguably Miyazaki's most loved film, My Neighbour Totoro was a major breakthrough for the fledgling Studio Ghibli, spearheaded by Hayao Miyazaki and Isao Takahata. It has produced some of the finest animated films of all time and although Totoro is not my favourite anime it is still one I regard very highly and one scene in particular from this beautiful children's film is simply memorable and wonderful in equal measure.
The film follows the progress of the Kusakabe family who have just moved to a new house in gorgeous rural Japan in the late 1950s. Daughters – Satsuki and Mei – have a lot to cope with in their childhood. As well as the house move their mother is recovering in hospital from a serious illness and their father is desperately trying to keep everything together juggling his work as a lecturer with visits to the hospital and caring for his daughters. One day Mei is wandering outside where the Kusakabe's home is overlooked by a giant tree. The young girl encounters a sleeping creature known as Totoro who quickly befriends both Mei and Satsuki, helping them by bringing wonder and joy to their difficult domestic lives. The film has some ambiguity in the respect that Totoro may or may not be real. While the adults entertain the girls' claims of seeing Totoro and his friends they don't have the same luxury. One argument is that Totoro is simply the combined imaginations of the two girls, a way to get them through a difficult period in their lives. Whatever the meaning the film remains a magical treat.
The best moment comes when the two girls are waiting at a bus stop for their father to come home. It's dark and raining, Satsuki is carrying Mei on her back and has one umbrella to shelter the two sisters, a second umbrella is to hand for their father. Waiting in the darkness and beneath the rain, Mei falls asleep and Satsuki hears footsteps before Totoro appears and stands beside her. It is the first time Satsuki has seen Totoro so she is initially wary. Totoro stands with the two girls with a small leaf acting as makeshift hat to protect him from the rain. Satsuki offers their spare umbrella and shows Totoro how to use it. He is initially perplexed but soon follows the girls' example. The sound of raindrops on the umbrella initially startles Totoro but suddenly he enjoys the moment and decides to jump up and down on the spot, sending a cascade of rainfall through the overhanging trees. This wonderful moment is rounded off beautifully when lights appear down the road and a bus arrives. This is no ordinary bus though – it's a cat bus with a very animated cat's head at the front and many legs on either side of the anthropomorphic vehicle. Totoro leaves the two girls a small gift before boarding the bus and heading off into the distance. This is magical Miyazaki at his best.
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