Patrick Rhone's Blog, page 27

Capturing Mickey

As we ventured past the ticketing gate of Disney World, on our final night there, Beatrix turned around in her stroller and asked, “Can I see Mickey? I haven’t seen him yet.”

It was true. During our five day stay, we had seen every available Princess. We had seen a lot of the other characters. We had even seen Mickey’s girlfriend Minnie. But we had not yet seen the main mouse himself.

Our original mission for the evening was to see the illuminated parade and the multimedia fireworks extravaganza (trust me, this is the only way to describe it). It was clear that prime viewing spots were filling up fast. But, as doting parents to a lovely five year old, our primary mission was now changed by this simple request. We rushed to find a spot along the parade route and, with Bethany holding our place, Beatrix and I went off to the Mickey meet and greet.

The line was remarkably short. Only about a five minute wait. Other such previous characters had wait times far longer. Everyone must have been focused on the pending parade. We were whisked right in to the front of the line.

Her turn to meet Mickey came. She had an autograph book in which she had been collecting signatures of all of the characters she met. She handed it and a red Sharpie pen to him at which point he saw the cover. It was a picture of his girlfriend, Minnie Mouse. He acted out a blush and pointed to the wall where a portrait of Minnie was hanging. The cast member helping out in Mickey’s room explained to us that he had not seen her all day and missed her very much. He kissed the book cover, signed it, handed it back to Beatrix, then he posed with her while I busily snapped a few shots with my camera as was the now standard practice. Then, I gestured that I had gotten my shot at which point the posing was done. I put my camera away.

After that, something unexpected happened. Mickey got down on one knee and pointed at a button on Beatrix’s dress that indicated it was her birthday. He took her hand, kissed it, then grabbed the other and pulled her near, leaning his face in close to hers. She kissed him sweetly on the nose. They gave each other a nice long hug and he waved her off goodbye.

As we left, I was particularly touched by the sweetness of the moment. A thought passed through my mind. The thought that I wished I had caught that last bit with the camera.

But then, on second thought, I was glad that I hadn’t. I’m glad that I was fully present to witness the joy of the moment that made my little girl’s birthday so special. To see it and remember it through my eyes and not a camera’s lens. A photograph may be able to capture a moment. But, a photograph can never capture a memory.

Homeward Bound

It’s been fun. We’ve had a great time. Beatrix got to do all that she wanted to do here. Including a very sweet kiss from Mickey and the most amazing multimedia fireworks show I’ve ever witnessed.

Now it’s time to go. Lots of packing and prep. Time to get back to the real world. And if there is anyplace on earth that is not real it is Disney. Yet, that is part of its appeal. It is a place to truly escape. And, frankly, we needed this escape very, very, badly.

See you tomorrow.

Five

My little girl turns five years old today.

Happy Birthday, B!

You are the best little girl in the whole world. It’s true. You know how I know? Your mommy told me and she’s always right.

The First Expectation

The first approximation of others is ourselves. In other words, the expectations we have for others in any given situation or environment, in lieu of those being expressly stated or agreed upon, are largely guided by those we set for ourselves. An example being that, if we are always punctual to appointments then we expect others to do the same and get quite perturbed when they are not. The less punctuality is important to you personally, in general the less bothered you will be when others also fail to meet this goal. This is something I have come to term the First Expectation and it is something I encounter and dwell on quite a bit for i believe that it is, in fact, one of the building blocks of any creed or belief system.

I feel it helpful to remember that how we treat ourselves when we fall short is also important. The more forgiveness and empathy we have with ourselves when we fail to meet our own first expectations should inform the measure we use to treat others. In the Christian tradition, “Love your neighbor as yourself.” is an idea embodied by the first expectation — and the empathy, forgiveness, and compassion contained therein 1. The idea being, in part, that if one lives and does these things, if they set this at the core of their expectations for themselves, it will also set an expectation for others to do the same.

Such things are far too often out of sync. Either we are far too hard on ourselves and have more liberal expectations of others or the opposite is true. Let us, instead, sit in empathy on all sides, open paths to communication that makes our first expectations clear, and mindfully listen and understand those of others.

In other more simple terms, in order to love another as one loves themselves then it is important to love oneself first so that we may set a bar in our love for others. If one does not hold themselves in kindness and respect, how does one hope to hold others accordingly? ↩

I See London, I See France

I warned you that this week may hold less of the regular material I write here and more of the “My Family Vacation” sort and so, well, here it is.

Spent the Disney day at Epcot today. Got there about a half hour before the park opened. The crowds were pretty light which worked out really well. Almost everyone headed for The Land pavilion due to some hot new attraction there. We headed to The Seas and had the place virtually to ourselves for at least a full hour. The story time with Crush was funny and very well done. The Nemo ride was pretty good too. But, the highlight, was the dolphin tank. As, stated, when we first entered we were the only ones there. We went up to the glass and, a few seconds later, one of the dolphins swam by and I threw him a little wave. Well, he saw it and immediately turned tail and came nose up to me, Bethany and Beatrix at the glass and smiled. Then, he swam away and came back with his four other dolphin friends who put on a show right at the glass just for us literally inches from our face. At this point one of the trainers came out and told us their names. He let us know that they not only saw us but could hear us talking, that they knew we were talking about them, and that they were, in fact, showing off for us. This went on for a full 20 minutes. It was magical.

The rest of the day was spent in the World Showcase. This is the section of he park where they have designed highly realistic and idealized reproductions of various countries. A good chunk of our time here was spent in the England and France areas because of the high percentage of Princess meet and greets. Beatrix got a chance to see and have her picture taken with Snow White, Cinderella, Belle, Alice, Mary Poppins, and her favorite of all, Rapunzel. Basically checking all of her favorites off of the list. Big win.

Once again, the attention to detail and the level of customer service and quality can’t be overstated. Even the various “countries” are staffed by people from those actual countries. Very impressive all around.

Tomorrow, we will spend the day in Animal Kingdom and see the Cirque du Soleil show La Nouba in the evening (and have a backstage tour arranged there) should be a great day.

Lessons From Disney

In addition to Beatrix, this is my first time at Disney World too. Bethany came when she was Beatrix’s age but has not been back since. Therefore, I had no idea what made it so special. I was completely laid back about the whole trip. I knew it would be magical for Beatrix but, then again, anything with Princesses is all she needs to be on board. But, then, as we drove down the highway heading to the Magic Kingdom and came up over the hill to see the gate to Disney right in front of us, Bethany and I lost all semblance of parental cool. The whole car became giddy as we oohed and aahed at every new detail…

And it did not stop for the rest of the day.

Our first day here filled me with observations, thoughts, and lessons learned. Many of which I have yet to quantify and I’m sure there will be even more to come. Here are just a few…

Plan the work then work the plan. — Everything at Disney is perfectly choreographed and orchestrated. Including you. They are just so expert at direction, crowd control, engagement, and organization, you don’t even realize you are simply part of the plan and have been since your car crossed that gate.

The price is always fair. — Everything at Disney is a bit expensive but never too expensive. You are never left feeling like the cost is greater than the value. You know you are not getting a bargain but that is because nothing is really “cheap” on either side of the perception. It is always perfectly fair. The food we had at Be Our Guest — the dinning hall in the Beasts Enchanted Castle — is a good example. Such a price for a sandwich seemed a bit high at first glance but then, when I received it, I realized that it was priced fairly. It was pretty decent and not too far out of line of what it would cost in the real world. This was true of everything I saw.

Details matter.— The attention to detail everywhere is simply insane. Let me suffice to say that anything you can think of, they have thought of it first and made it perfect. From the approach from the parking lot to the ticket booths to the ferry landing to the approach of the boat as it takes you across the lake — never out of view of the magic castle or stunningly pristine viewing angles of the on-property resorts you now wished you had mortgaged the house to stay in — they have imagined an ideal more perfect than you could have on your own. They are selling your dreams back to you at a markup and even that price is fair.

It’s a small world after all. — Every cast member has their home town on their name badge. With a few thousand cast members at any given time, you are likely to have an interaction with someone from someplace you have some association with.

Under promise and over deliver. — … And if you, by mistake, over promise, deliver even more. Here’s the thing, no matter how early you get there you will wait in lines for everything. Helpfully, they have the expected wait times at the entrance to all of the attractions. That posted wait time is almost always longer than the actual wait time. Therefore, you are always delighted the line went faster than expected. Setting such an expectation is a classic under promise and sets up the opportunity to deliver more. In the one case where that was not true, the Dumbo Ride, they had a kid’s play area while you waited that delivered as much fun as the ride itself.

Be a step above. — Everything at Disney is a step above any other similar experience you have had at any other similar amusement park (similar being a very loose term here because, I can now say with relative certainty, there is no such thing). The employees are more cheerful, friendly, helpful, and nice than anywhere else. I was even impressed that every other guest seemed unfailingly courteous and nice — every accidental bump or slight by a stranger was followed without prompt by an apology and/or rectification. The rides are all better than similar ones at other parks too. All the food I’ve had so far has been a notch above. The list goes on.

Everyone knows your name.— Beatrix wore a Belle (Beauty and The Beast) princess dress on day one. Therefore, every single cast member addressed to her as “Princess” or “Your Majesty” and Bethany and I as “King and Queen”. Every single time. They not only never missed it but went out of their way to make her feel like the most special guest of all. They realize that, for a girl of her age, doing anything else would chink the armor of her fantasy and enjoyment. When you know they do this for every single girl in a princess dress, instead of making it seem routine, blows my mind even more. Think about it. They can make each of tens of thousands of girls a day feel like an exclusive honored guest.

Cleanliness is next to godliness. — This is the most spotless amusement park I have ever been to. Even late in the day and a few hundred thousand visitors later I would dare you to find a single piece of garbage on the ground. Even the bathrooms all look like you could dine off of the porcelain and smells like a garden.

Suffice it to say that I love it here. There is so much to be learned for sure. And I know I will have more to think and write about. But, most of all, my little girl is being filled with good memories that will last a lifetime and nothing can make me happier than that.

I Don’t Know

I don’t know when I became so uncomfortable with not knowing.

It used to be when I was in conversation with a friend at a restaurant, and could not remember that thing — you know, that one little thing, that thing that was right there on the tip of my tongue just a second ago — that I had to be comfortable with having forgotten it. I had to be content with not having all the answers. I was at ease with my humanity. We humans, forget.

I did not have all of the world’s information at my fingertips. I did not stop the conversation, whip out my smartphone, and find the answer. My memory was not bolstered and supported by such a crutch. The gaps in my knowledge had no such mortar to fill them. Yet, I was OK with this. I lost no sleep over it — save those nights that thing I could not remember in earlier conversation came to me like a jolt as I drifted off to sleep. But even here was a certain potential. The promise that even things I could not remember were not forgotten. That all knowledge I had obtained until the present lay deep within me. That all I did not know was a boundless opportunity to fulfill through scholarship, effort, interest, and happenstance.

These days, I think I have all the answers. Even when I don’t they are but a few taps away. And I don’t think it makes me any more the wiser.

I’m a writer. Writing is how I make this world better, friendlier, stronger place. If these words improved your day, please let me know by contributing here.

Manic Monday

Busy day ahead. Exciting. Yet, lots of little details to wrangle. I’ll explain…

Today will start like most weekdays. Beatrix will awake at about an hour before she is supposed to. I will hear her call for me on the monitor. I’ll stumble down the hallway to her room where will will have a short but important negotiation that will end up with me, as usual, allowing her to read books quietly in her room until it is actually time to get up. This will be indicated by a nightlight that turns into a sun at exactly 7:00am. When this occurs and only when this occurs, is she to come down the hall and wake me. She will agree. I’ll stumble back to bed.

At 7:00am on the dot she will come into my bedroom and announce that the sun is on. I will get up, go downstairs with her, get a show started on the media center, start the coffee, fix her breakfast, feed the dog and cats, and make her school lunch. In that order. I will then go sit with her as she watches the show.

Bethany will come down stairs shortly there after. She will apologize for not being down sooner and blame it on the cats attacking her and needing attention (yes, this occurs every morning). She will then pour us our coffee. A half cup for herself because she likes it piping hot and she can’t drink a full cup more than half way before it has cooled beyond her liking. She will pour a full cup for me and put just under a tablespoon of sugar in mine.

Once the show is over we will all get dressed, I will brush Beatrix’s hair, and help get the two of them out the door. Bethany usually takes Beatrix to school. On any other Monday we would then both get on with our days. Regular meetings and client appointments. The freelancer’s life.

But, today will be different. You see, Beatrix will turn five years old this upcoming Saturday. We know our time is quickly running out. The time when she still believes in make believe. And Princesses. And fairies. And witches. And magic. And good guys winning. And baddies being bad but not so bad that you will have nightmares about them because the good guys always win anyways and she is a Princess (capital “P”) too and the fairies will keep her from having nightmares anyway because, you know, that is their job.

So, today we will return and pack her bags. We have already secretly packed ours. Normally, on Mondays, Bethany’s Aunt Janet picks Beatrix up early from school and takes her to music class. Today, Jan is picking us up first. We will load up the car with the bags and go to school to pick up Beatrix as planned. Jan will go in to get her and bring her out to the car.

Now, when she gets to the car and sees Mommy and Daddy inside, I expect Beatrix will ask, “Are you guys coming with me to music class today?”

At which point we will tell her.

No, honey. We aren’t going to music class today…

We’re going to Disney World!

P.S. I will, of course, try to keep up with the daily posting here, even if it’s just a picture of my favorite little girl enjoying a moment she, all too soon, will be too old to ever appreciate the same way again.

Heaven On Their Minds

Growing up I must have listened the the original cast recording of Jesus Christ Superstar hundreds, if not thousands, of times. In fact, I actually remember wearing out my mother’s original copy and her getting me a replacement for a birthday present one year (likely age 7 or 8). It remains one of my favorite albums of all time. I still know every single word and can sing it, every part, from beginning to end.

The film version is also brilliant. Directed by Norman Jewison and staring Ted Neeley as Jesus and Carl Anderson as Judas. Two more perfect actors could not have been found for these roles. Judas especially as the Broadway production started Ben Vereen in the role (for which he won a Tony). I believe Carl Anderson to be the better singer for this particular role that calls for a mixture of fear, anger, and love in the tone. I love too the film’s unspoken opening premise of a bunch of hippies getting off of a bus in the middle of Israel to stage a modern day passion play.

Seriously, I could go on for a very long time about this musical. My mother is an actress and director so I grew up with a deep love and respect for musicals in general and this one particularly. It excels on just about every level one can measure. For now, the video above I hope is evidence enough for you to see the film if you have not already. In my opinion, one can never have too much heaven on their minds.

(via Mr. Mann, who managed to point out a piano gaffe I had not ever noticed before but now will not ever be able to un-hear.)

What’s Broken?

On those occasions when I have the foresight to sit down and do a clear and comprehensive capture and review of all of my commitments, one of my favorite exercises is one I have come to call “What’s Broken?”. The process is this:

Grab your capture tool of choice (I prefer pen and paper).
Go to a room in your home.
Look around and ask yourself “What’s Broken?”. Broken can mean many things, from “The layout of this room is not working as well as it could.” to “I need to sort through the stack of papers on that table.” to “Need to replace the lighbulb.” Get everything, from big tasks to small ones. The point is to capture as many items that grab your attention in one sitting and get them into a system of action you trust so that those things are not niggling you each time you enter the room (subconscious or otherwise).
Repeat for each room.

This works great and I always feel a lot more on top of things having simply quantified them. I can then set up context specific lists that I can focus more clearly on. For instance, setting aside an hour per room each week and knocking as many things off the list as possible. It is immensely satisfying and can change your whole attitude about the spaces you dwell in.

This method can also be useful at work. Take a half hour to capture what’s broken about your job or work environment. Even the things you think you can’t change. Because capturing everything will allow you to take action on the things you can change and, at the least, identify the things you can’t.

Lately, this has me thinking about expanding this exercise to less obvious places. For instance, taking inventory of my social networks that are not working as well as they should. Or even my real world relationships. Taking a hard look and asking “What’s broken?”.

Unseen or ignored problems will only be solved by identifying them. Bringing these to your attention and quantifying them is the first step to eradicating them. For me, this has proved a very effective question in many areas of my life.

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