Donald Miller's Blog, page 57

What We Can All Learn from Good Dads

The strongest resistance I face every day is invisible. Every time I want to take a risk, do something bold, or make a big commitment, it gets right up in my face. It’s crippling, accusing, and limiting.

I face fear every day.

That must be why “do not fear” is the most repeated command in The Bible. God knows we need to hear it over and over again.

I’m not a father yet.

But I have noticed a trait I see in good dads. Good dads lovingly lead their children into things that are scary.

As much as it must pain a father to watch his kid scream, shake, and tremble, he knows his kids need to walk through fear to get to the good stuff.

I recently watched a father walk his young boy through a ropes course that led up to a towering zip line platform. As they moved, the dad walked in front of and behind his son depending on where they were. He paid attention to what his son needed from him. He watched the boy’s feet and told him where to step next. He held onto his son when he needed to let go of the ropes, and he kept saying “You got this buddy, don’t be afraid, you’re doing great!”

He knew the outcome would be worth it.

As they reached the top of the rickety tower, the boy’s fear was off the charts. From nearly 100 feet below, I could see his legs shaking as he wrapped his arms around the pole coming up the center of the platform.

At this point, a couple of the other kids were turning around in tears and going back down. Noticing this, his dad got down on his knee, leaned in close, and looked his boy in the eyes. I couldn’t hear what he was saying, but I could see his boy trying to believe him, nodding, and slowly walking closer to the edge. I could feel his heart pounding from where I stood on the ground.

Even as a grown man who hasn’t been to summer camp for a long time, I haven’t forgotten what that feels like.

Probably because life feels like a rope course.

I’m still trying to figure out where to put my feet, still afraid to let go of the ropes, and I’m always wondering whether or not the steel cable holding me up is legit. I’m weary of the great heights that success, love, and adventure all entail because it’s a long way down from the top.

When the kid finally jumped off the platform and took a wild ride over the top of my head, it moved me. It reminded me that God is the ultimate good dad. He watches over our steps, He knows what we need, and He is more trustworthy than a steel cable.

The look on the kid’s face when he came down assured me of one thing: We were made to walk through fear. All the good stuff is waiting on us.

What We Can All Learn from Good Dads is a post from: Storyline Blog

How Your Possessions Are Affecting Your Heart

For most of my life, I have lived under the impression that my actions will follow my heart—that the things I treasured most would be reflected by my investments. As the saying goes, “You can tell what’s important to someone by looking at their calendar and checkbook.”

While I think there is some truth in that statement, over the past few years of pursuing minimalism, I have begun to notice that the inverse is probably even more true.

It is not necessarily that my actions follow the desires of my heart. Instead, I find that my heart appears naturally drawn to the places where I have invested most.

It is a subtle distinction, but an important one.

Jesus said it like this, “Where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.” Notice in his phrasing, it is our heart that follows our treasure.

This principle was profoundly etched in my mind the day my family and I went grocery shopping and left the store to find a fresh, large, white scrape across the passenger side of our maroon minivan.

The minivan was far from new. Yet, there was an immediate pit that emerged in my stomach over the wrong that had been committed. The driver kindly left us with no insurance or contact information, just a large noticeable scrape down the side of our vehicle. The distress was strengthened by the fact that I knew too well I was too cheap to ever get it repaired. The unsightly scratch would likely remain over the course of the van’s life.

My wife and I drove away in silence.

I began to reflect on the scratch and more importantly, how the incident had impacted me internally.

I found it interesting to consider the fact that if this same scrape had been left on my bicycle, I would not have been nearly as upset. And I couldn’t help but wonder why that was the case. Why did the action cut so deep into my stomach and heart? Why was a white scrape on my minivan causing such a heart-level response?

*Photo Credit: Jim Pennucci, Creative Commons

I realized I was so upset about this scrape because our vehicle was such a large investment. I had invested considerable money into buying it and time and energy caring for it. I wouldn’t mind if my son’s skateboard got a new scratch because… well, I didn’t have nearly as much treasure invested into it. But my vehicle was a huge investment (probably our second biggest) and because of that, my heart naturally gravitated toward it.

Where our treasures are, there our hearts will be also.

Our hearts always follow our greatest investments.

Whether it be our car, our house, our career, or our investment portfolio. We literally tie our hearts to certain things by the sheer amount of investment we put into them.

Unfortunately, too many of us are tying our hearts to the wrong things.

We are devoting our lives and tying our hearts to material possessions that will never last or bring us true joy. We shop for bigger houses, faster cars, trendier clothes and cooler technology. Subsequently, we invest so much of our time and energy into caring for them. But lasting fulfillment can never be tied to things that are temporal by nature.

Instead, we ought to invest our money, time, and lives into things that are truly important. Invest into your family, your friends, spiritual pursuits, or the causes that you believe in. As you do, you’ll notice your heart naturally begins to be drawn to them more and more.

The allure of materialism is hard to break.

As long as we live on earth surrounded by material possessions, keeping them in proper perspective is going to be a struggle. But we can begin to break its fascination in our lives by reminding ourselves that we are investing more than our dollars into them. We are tying our very hearts to them as well.

Invest your treasure into the things that matter most. Your heart will soon follow.

How Your Possessions Are Affecting Your Heart is a post from: Storyline Blog

Olympic Gold Medalist Talks About What Really Matters

This year’s Storyline Conference takes place over Halloween weekend. And we’ve put together our greatest lineup of speakers ever.

We know you won’t want to leave your kids, but the treat we’ve put together may benefit them far more than candy, and for the rest of their lives.

We hope you won’t come home the same.

This year we’ve asked Scott Hamilton to speak from the main stage at Storyline. You probably noticed Scott all over the Sochi Winter Olympics coverage this past winter, but we know him as someone more than an Olympic gold medalist and commentator. We invited Scott because he’s an inspirational husband, father, and follower of Jesus.

How do you perform in front of billions of people without losing your mind? Talk about pressure. It’s more pressure than you and I could deal with.

Or is it?

All of us feel this incredible need to perform.

Whether it’s in our roles as wives and husbands or as business leaders or as parents. So how do we do it? How do we not screw up our kids and our careers and our love lives? How do we deal with the pressure?

The key for Scott was to remain centered in the reality of the person of Jesus. After he lost his mother to cancer, he was awakened to his need for something bigger than himself and to realize the things that please God are different than the things that please the people around us.

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We know and love Scott and assure you his life is all about loving people because he himself has been loved by Jesus. Whether it’s being a faithful husband, father of two, or working with his wife Tracie to adopt two more children from Haiti, Scott lives a life as meaningful as anybody we’ve ever met.

We can’t wait for you to meet him.

The goal of Scott’s session at Storyline is to inspire you to believe that no matter who you are or what setbacks you’ve encountered, anything is possible. Scott became an Olympian despite having grown up in difficult circumstances and battling the toughest of resistance. And yet he wasn’t taken down. He survived, and more than surviving, he lives an amazing life of meaning.

Sometimes it’s when we hear somebody else’s story that we find a plot line for our own.

It’s like a path suddenly clears in the woods.

I think you’ll be amazed at not only what Scott has accomplished in his career, but who he has become. There’s not an ounce of guile in this man. His story is pure inspiration.

If you’ve not registered for Storyline Conference in Chicago yet, please do. We’re aiming to inspire you to live a life of meaning.

Here are a few thoughts from Scott:

If you register for Storyline before September 18th, you’ll get a physical copy of Donald Miller’s new book Scary Close three months before the public release date*. You’ll also be invited to attend the wrap party where he’ll sign it upon your request. Register today. Seats are limited.

*register as Experience + or Experience Pro to qualify

Olympic Gold Medalist Talks About What Really Matters is a post from: Storyline Blog

A Better Way to Introduce Your Friends at Parties

Recently, I had a couple friends from out of town stop in for breakfast as they were passing through Nashville. My friend Carolyn came over early to join in catching up with our friends and, more importantly, to ensure that I didn’t burn the bacon.

Our visitors updated us on their work lives.

One works in the public health field and the other works to alleviate child hunger through the nonprofit sector. They told stories of children they’d helped and life-changing projects they’d worked on.

When the coffee was gone, we cleared the table and contemplated holding our friends hostage before reluctantly sending them on their way.

We finished up the dishes, making small talk about where the pans go and filling the silence with clanking ceramic and a running faucet.

I was happy to have Carolyn with me.

After we’d put the last plate away, Carolyn made some comment about how amazing the work our friends do is and before I really knew what was happening, she’d burst into tears.

You see, Carolyn is a meeting planner.

And a really good one, at that. But often, and especially on this day, she can feel stuck when the conversation revolves only around what people do. Not many people understand meeting planning, nor do they know what to ask next when the ever so common “so what do you do?” is posed.

So my friend ends up feeling stuck.

She ends up feeling like her occupation is the only way she can connect with people, and if they don’t find her work interesting enough, then she must not be very interesting.

And that’s a lie, of course.

But it got me thinking. Carolyn is one of the most interesting people I know. It’s why I want her around when I have friends over and why I call her first when I’m looking for sound advice. She knows how to meet you in deep waters and pull you back up for air without panicking or judging how you got there.

She shows up more than any friend I have.

And that’s exactly how I’m going to start introducing her.

I don’t mind being introduced based on what I do, but I would argue an introduction opening a window to who I am would be refreshing for both parties.

*Photo Credit: Neil Conway, Creative Commons

What if instead of introducing your friend as Jennifer the nurse, you started introducing her as Jennifer, one of most thoughtful people you know, or Jennifer the friend who helped you move in when you didn’t know a soul in this city.

Introducing your friends for who they are rather than focusing on what they do will remind them they are loved before and beyond their titles. It’s an easy way to remind them that you see them for their hearts instead of their accomplishments.

Our resumes are just paper.

I want people to know my friend Carolyn is amazing at her job, but more than that, I want people to know the stuff inside her that makes her a great friend. The stuff that makes you want to stand by her at a party, in hopes that her thoughtful observations and quick wit might rub off on you.

Let’s stop introducing the people we love based solely on what they do, who they cash their checks from, or what’s on their twitter profiles. Let’s instead start reminding them of who they are. Let’s start conversations that don’t begin and end with who has the most interesting job in the room.

Networking builds an empire, but thoughtful introductions build a community. Where will you lay your bricks?

A Better Way to Introduce Your Friends at Parties is a post from: Storyline Blog

If You Want to Write a Book, Start With Your Story

If you want to write a book about physics, you’ll have to know a lot about physics. And the same goes for psychology and botany. But to write a humane book, be it fiction or memoir, all you really need to know is your own story.

We read books for different reasons.

Sometimes it’s to learn a craft or for a perspective on current events, but the books most people read aren’t approached with a specific ambition at all. What we want most is to not feel alone — to allow somebody to rummage inside our minds and souls and point out all the ways we are alike.

And to write this sort of book, you only need to know your own story.

*Photo Credit: Andrew Nguyen, CutandSow

Like a painter, a writer writes with colors and textures. Sure there’s form, and it helps to know how a story works, but the real genius lies in the ability to remain human and to connect with other humans.

Colors and textures are your human experiences.

Here are a few to keep in mind as you write:

Fear. What makes you afraid? Fear is the most dominant human emotion, and it’s the seed of so many other emotions: jealousy, rage, insecurity and detachment. A good writer knows this and won’t mistake one for the other. And so in your work, mine what it is you’re afraid of. Are you afraid of losing control? Are you afraid of death? Are you afraid to succeed? The more you can paint with that color, the more people will recognize themselves in your work and the less they’ll feel alone.
Vulnerability. Even if you’re writing fiction, you should feel like you’re telling secrets. And they should be deep, dark secrets you’d only tell your most trusted friend. Remember, when we write we are becoming the temporal companion of the reader, and if we want them to trust us, we have to give up our secrets.
Love. I know it sounds mushy, but it helps to actually love your reader. While a non-fiction diatribe may work to insist a theological point, a person who doesn’t love his or her reader will never write a classic. It’s not been done. Never write from a defensive posture. If you do, you’ll never be able to be vulnerable or honestly talk about your fears, and your reader will smell it out and move on. If it helps, imagine writing a story for your closest friend or significant other.

And don’t apologize.

Your story may frustrate some people, but if they don’t accept you as you are, they really wouldn’t have been your friend in the first place. If you’re writing a memoir, you don’t have to apologize for drinking too much or bingeing on ice cream. Just report the events like a loving journalist. Nobody gets to steal your humanity. Speak from the heart.

When it’s all said and done, any human being can write a very human book. But of course, the trick is to become human again. Critics, scolders and conditional lovers can have you living in fear. Forgive them. We’ve all done it to each other.

And rather than return evil for evil, let’s just walk gently with each other in our writing and in our lives.

Writing a book? Hone your craft at the Storyline Writers Workshop when you register for our full Storyline Conference experience in Chicago this Fall. Space is limited, so register soon!

If You Want to Write a Book, Start With Your Story is a post from: Storyline Blog

One Word That Makes All The Difference In Relationships

Around my birthday every year, I get sentimental. I think about birthdays past and all the things that have changed for my family and me in the last 364 days.

*Photo Credit: Tela Chhe, Creative Commons

I think about the people who’ve been there. I think about the people who mean the world to me; I think about the people I’ve lost and gained, and I think about what it is that weaves some of us together while others are content to live at the margins.

What makes some relationships different?

Why do some coworkers, neighbors, and family members become true friends while others remain acquaintances? Why do only some bosses become mentors? How do spouses foster a connection of unparalleled depth?

I think the answer is found in one small word, or rather, what that word represents. The word is “for.”

You’re not impressed, are you? Let me explain.

You probably feel pretty satisfied with your relationships if you have friends, neighbors, family members, coworkers, and a significant other who care about you. Until, that is, you meet someone who cares for you.

Not just about you.

That one word — and the actions it implies — are what separate the most meaningful people in your life from the people you went to high school with who “Like” all your photos on Facebook.

To care about someone is to feel bad for them when tragedy strikes. To care for someone is to show up when tragedy strikes, preferably with food in hand, and sit with them in silence and grief.

About means my heart goes out to you. For means my arms go out to you. About means you hope things turn around for me very soon.

“For” means you help me pick up the pieces.

Caring for people, rather than just about them, makes all the difference.

Love, as it turns out, is more than a feeling. Great stories—and great relationships—are defined by actions, not sympathies.

As such, we should all pay more attention to the people in your various circles who treat you and others this way, and guard those connections fiercely.

As we pursue deeper and stronger friendships, we have to realize the goal isn’t to care about people with more intensity, but to care for them with more activity.

One Word That Makes All The Difference In Relationships is a post from: Storyline Blog

How Tolerating Drama Will Only Hold You Back

I have a friend named Paul who has set up his automated email signature to read “No Drama.” At first, I thought it was an odd thing to add to every email he sends out, but then I realized how much drama we unnecessarily create in life. And it doesn’t serve us, our work, or our lives.

My friend is one of the world’s leading YouTube experts.

Companies are always bringing him in to help them make the most of their YouTube efforts, and yet he’s always calm, always cool. He never panics, mainly because he realizes there’s so little to actually panic about.

*Photo Credit: woodleywonderworks, Creative Commons

I find I create drama, mostly, as a sideways way of playing the victim. If I perceive a situation as harder than it really is, I have all kinds of excuses to procrastinate, be rude to people, or just turn in inferior work.

On the other hand, making a bigger deal out of something than I need to could cause tension in relationships and my career.

People are generally attracted to others who are calm, especially under pressure.

Self awareness is tough.

But I wonder if it would benefit us to ask ourselves honestly if we’re creating more drama than that which reflects reality.

Just today I found out somebody had stolen my credit card and made some online charges. In my mind, I made a big deal out of it, having to be on hold with credit card companies, having to call my accountant, and so on. And the whole event was taking away from my writing.

Instead of creating more drama, though, I remembered my friend Paul’s policy. Ultimately, the stolen card amounted to 30 minutes on the phone listening to classical music while on hold.

That’s really it.

Not all that dramatic, after all.

So now, I’m back to writing, feeling rather calm, calm enough to write this blog. And because I didn’t let the drama derail me, I even got this little life lesson out of the situation.

Ever caught yourself making more drama out of a situation than necessary? If so, want to commit to a “no drama” policy with me?

How Tolerating Drama Will Only Hold You Back is a post from: Storyline Blog

The Easiest Way to Get Exactly What You Want

Life has just not been going my way lately. I’ve been sitting here for thirty minutes trying to think of a better way to say it than that—a way that sounds a little more mature and a little less entitled, but no matter how I boil it down, it really comes back to that. Things have not been going my way and I’ve been feeling frustrated and depressed and sad about it.

This is not a new feeling for me.

That is, the sense that no matter how hard I work to get the outcome I want—in my marriage, in my career, in my friendships, in my life—I get a different one. And maybe this is the reason why it’s so easy for me to get wrapped up in it.

Too often, I find myself in a place where I think, “maybe no matter how hard I try, things won’t ever get better for me.”

*Photo Credit: Andrew Nguyen

It was in this state of frustration and despair that I found myself at a friend’s house a few weeks ago, crying and desperate for advice. She listened to my story and let me get it all out—even the part where I was complaining and blaming and feeling really sorry for myself. She’s a good friend like that.

Then, when I was all finished, she asked if I could name a few things I thought would help my circumstances.

I had a few specific things in mind.

They were fairly simple. I wanted a car, first of all. It’s hard to explain why this mattered so much to me, but my husband and I have been sharing for a few years and I’ve tried to be a really good sport about it. After all, it was saving us money and we’d been trying to get a good buffer in our savings account and get out of debt.

But at this point I was feeling like not having my own car was really holding me back from what I wanted to accomplish.

The second thing I wanted was a few people who I could talk to, who knew how much I was struggling. For the most part, I told her, I felt like I was going through this alone, and just knowing a few other people knew how I felt would make me feel a little bit better.

After I finished, she was quiet for a minute.

Then she asked, “Have you asked for those things?”

Instantly, a thousand excuses came to my mind—excuses about how much money it was going to be to buy a new car and how my husband would never go for it because then we’d have to get insurance and how I would tell people how much I was struggling but “I’m new in town” and “I don’t really have a lot of friends…”

But the longer my explanation became, the more I realized everything I was saying was just an excuse.

It was just a bunch of junk in the way of the truth—which was that I hadn’t asked.

I hadn’t asked for any of the things I wanted.

I hadn’t said any of it out loud. I had been trying to be a good sport about things, trying to go with the flow, trying to give everyone else what they wanted, hoping someday someone would notice what I wanted, too, and would go out of their way to give it to me.

But I hadn’t done the simplest thing you can possibly do and just asked for what I needed.

I went home that day and asked my husband if he could talk. I told him how much I really wanted a new car. I launched into my whole explanation, but before I could even finish explaining, he was on craigslist, searching for a car. And within 48 hours, I had one.

It was really that easy.

Since then, I’ve made it a point to start speaking up about what I want and being honest about what I need. The other day, I got my hair done and the minute my stylist was done I told her, “I don’t like the color. Can we do it a little darker next time?”

I never would have said something like that before. I would have felt like I was being picky and rude. But this time I said it.

I could tell it made my stylist a little uncomfortable, but you know what? She also jumped to fix the problem.

Then, later in the week, I went to dinner with friends.

When my dinner came, it wasn’t what I ordered. Usually, I would have just “gone with flow” and picked around the things I didn’t like. I wouldn’t have wanted to make a scene or draw any attention to myself. But this time I decided I was going to say something.

I was going to ask for exactly what I wanted.

So, I let my server know. And within minutes, I had what I had ordered.

It’s amazing the power we have when we’re willing to just speak up—to just say exactly what we want.

I’m not sure why this has felt so hard for me.

When I write it here it seems rather stupid. It seems like it should be pretty easy.

But I guess there’s a difference between simple and easy. And sometimes the simplest solutions are the hardest ones to actually execute.

I’ve always been the “go with the flow” girl, the “flexible” girl, the “whatever-you-want” kind of girl. But I’m over it. I’m speaking up about what I want.

And chances are, most of the time, I might actually get it.

The Easiest Way to Get Exactly What You Want is a post from: Storyline Blog

What To Say When Everything Is Not “Fine”

She came up to me while I was in line at the bakery. I hadn’t seen her for years. “Hi Al!” she said. “Is life treating you great?” The way she asked it, there was only one acceptable answer.

I wish you could have seen the contortions my mind was going through in the several seconds between her question and my answer. I knew there were a couple of options for my response.

I could lie.

“Yes, life’s treating me amazingly! And you?” And she’s say, “Yes, life’s great!” Then we’d move on, get a cinnamon roll and go about our day.

Or, I could tell the truth. “Actually, life’s treating me crappy. One of my cars is leaking oil like the Exxon Valdez, and the other one is making a terrible noise. My dog found the mouse poison and liked the taste of it, which meant an emergency trip to the vet. Chipmunks chewed through the wire that powers our landscape lighting. My gas grill died. Some crook stole my identity, racking up $30,000 worth of bills on credit cards they opened in my name. And last week, I hurt my shoulder and my knee at the gym. So to answer your question, “No, life is NOT treating me great. How are you?”

I realized neither answer was a good representation of my story.

And I couldn’t do the first response any more.

Life wasn’t treating me “great” and to say “fine” was neither truthful nor genuine.

I’ll admit, the second potential response was a little overboard, and frankly a bit rude. While technically accurate, my energy was to expose her shallow question in light of my present experience of life. Yes, I can be tacky.

Here’s what I said instead, “Good to see you! Ya know, I’m finding these days that life doesn’t particularly treat me great. But I’m actually doing OK.”

She looked at me like my dog Hobbs looks at me when I talk with him. He cocks his head with an expression that says, “I know you’re saying something I should understand, but I don’t have a clue what you’re talking about.”

We exchanged pleasantries and moved on.

Every day, we’re given the choice to tell our real story or a story that people want to hear.

Telling the truth or telling a lie. I’m practicing telling the truth these days.

When someone says, “How are you?” (a daily occurrence usually offered with sincere kindness), I have one of two responses. I either say, “In many areas I’m doing quite well.” Or I respond with a question, “In what area?” (i.e. what do they want to know about?)

*Photo Credit: Adam Przewoski, Unsplash

Usually those responses evoke a chuckle, a pause, and then a conversation about the story I’m living at the moment.

Inevitably the conversation turns to their story.

And then we connect.

In the late 1800’s, Scottish pastor and author John Watson wrote: “Be kind to everyone you meet, for everyone is fighting a great battle.”

What if we were to live with that understanding about one another? Every day, we have the opportunity to connect about the stories we are going through. Even if just for a few moments. A chance to say “I know you are fighting a great battle, and I so am I.” To say, “I’m a fellow sojourner. I’m with you.”

A chance to commune with compassion.

Every interaction we have is a holy one.

And if we knew the real story of the person in line at the grocery store or the friend we pass on the street, we’d speak differently to one another.

So the next time someone greets you with, “How are you?” – make it real. That person needs to hear a true story, and deep down, they long to tell you their own.

What To Say When Everything Is Not “Fine” is a post from: Storyline Blog

Having Integrity Doesn’t Make You a Good Person

I recently had a conversation with somebody in which I doubted what they were saying was true. I hate those conversations, but years ago I promised myself that if the person was a friend, or somebody I worked with, I wouldn’t just walk away. Instead, I decided to say something. I kept it light, but I said enough that I wouldn’t go to bed that night without some clarity.

The response I received was a long, passionate monologue about how the person had never told a lie in their life.

This person kept using the word “integrity.”

But the truth is, we all exaggerate. We all see the facts through our own self-serving lens. We are all, well, a mixture of good and bad. And the sad truth is, we’ve all told lies.

Often when we talk about integrity, we don’t fully understand what the word means.

A person with integrity isn’t always a good person. There aren’t any purely good people. Another, more realistic understanding of the term integrity involves a person being integrated. And by integrated I mean they understand they have a mixture of motives.

They sometimes do good.

They sometimes do bad. They sometimes are loving, and they’re sometimes spiteful. Some people are better than others, but nobody is purely good and nobody is purely bad (I’m speaking in practical terms, not theological terms regarding sanctification and so on).

*Photo Credit: Nadine Heidrich, Creative Commons

And so, when I hear a person defending their integrity as though they are completely good, I know, in fact, they aren’t really integrated. And people who aren’t integrated are dangerous. Not evil, not bad, I just wouldn’t ride too closely behind them.

They have blind spots. If you can’t admit you have blind spots, you’ll never check them, and if you don’t check them, you’re more likely to get in a wreck.

Religious communities love the word integrity.

But I don’t think many of them understand it. Sadly, the word is often used as a way of painting ourselves as righteous, or worse, to describe another person in unrealistic terms.

Let me ask you this: Do you feel the need to be a better person than you really are? Do you feel the need to defend yourself as having integrity rather than feel at ease being truly integrated? When somebody confronts you, are you able to process their comment objectively or does something rise up inside you that wants to defend yourself?

Here’s a little tip on becoming integrated:

Lean in close to Christ.

When we know our God loves us whether we are good or bad or a mix, we don’t have to be so defensive.

When we know we are accepted by the only judge with the authority to judge (in eternal matters) we have the power to accept ourselves as we really are, and that means to be integrated.

An integrated person is somebody who can remain objective about themselves. And it’s Jesus, not religion, that allows us to be objective about ourselves because if we know Jesus there is no penalty for our shortcomings.

Of course we may be disciplined in love.

But ultimately we are okay as we are. It’s a works-based religion that doles out reward and punishment based on our actions and can easily lead to a disintegrated personality.

Do you feel safe letting people know about your shortcomings? If so, why and if not, why not?

Having Integrity Doesn’t Make You a Good Person is a post from: Storyline Blog