Matthew S. Williams's Blog, page 201

Space Anthology!

My apologies to all those expecting a post about zombies or post-apocalyptic stories. You see, my group and I are busy designing an entire world for our new anthology and we needed some mock-ups to help speed our imaginations to their goal. That’s been my obsession these last few days, that and visiting family. But alas, I have no idea how to post a PDF file to a Shaw Photo Share account, so I came here to do it instead. Behold… Our new Colony Ship!

Colony Ship

Yeah, doesn’t look like much there does it? Well, first you gotta click on the link, genius! Then, you need to use your imagination. Hang on to it though, I plan to do a mock-up using a real graphics engine, maybe add some color, some cross-sections, a scale to show its true size. Then it’ll look like something worthy of this group!

In any case, it’s built around the concepts of a generation ship and a sleeper-ship, with the habitation module in the front and the cryo-stasis bays in the rear. And of course, for the people in the habitation area, the concept of an O’Neil Cylinder comes into play – a ship that utilizes a rotating section to generate gravity. And I think a long spine connecting the bridge, hab module, cryo-bays, engine room and storage/shuttle bay together would also be cool.

Oh, and I should mention that we’ve selected a location for our story and done some additional mapping to give the setting a truly realistic feel. As already noted, the star system in question is Gliese 581, and the planet is 581 g, a real exoplanet that scientists believe could host life. And here is what it looks like, for our purposes anyway:

It’s called Yuva, a Turkish word which translates to “Home”. All the continents are named in honor of the scientists who helped discover Gliese 581′s planetary system. The rest, well, that’s all us baby! The polar continent, named New Gondwana, is named after the super-continent of Earth’s Precambrian period. And the vast stretches of sea are just tentative names that I thought seemed appropriate, given their position between the major landmasses. Note the color, which denotes levels of fertility, green being lush, grey being glacial, and yellow and light green being desert of dry shrug land.

The Star Wars That I Used To Know

You know that song that’s been getting stuck in your head over and over for the last year or so, thanks to viral videos and constant radio exposure? Well, if you’re not thinking of “Somebody That I Used to Know” – the Gotye original that was recently covered and re-popularized by Walk of the Earth – then we are on two completely different wavelengths!

But I’m not here to talk about our psychic disparities. The point is that a group named Teddiefilms has breathed new life into this song and Lucas-bashing by producing a satire of this song. Entitled “The Star Wars That I Used To Know”, this song does an amazing job of capturing fan angst and the spirit of the song. Ably written, performed, and directed in a way that calls to the mind the original video, this parody has it all!

Check it out…

New Total Recall Trailer

Yep, as the title line says, a new trailer has come out for the upcoming remake of Total Recall. Ordinarily, this wouldn’t be that big a deal, except that this one shows how they are including a key part from the old movie: the three-breasted hooker! It seems that she will be featured in this movie as well, which geeks everywhere were sure to be asking. It goes without saying that anyone who saw the original remembers that woman. But for true sci-fi geeks and pubescent boys, she was right up there with Princess Leia in the bikini, inspiring more than her share of nerdgasms!

And since the movie is getting nearer, I am wondering if I am going to bother to see it. Sure, I’m curious and kind of intrigued by the reboot of a movie I appreciated as an adolescent, but is it worth it? Given the price of tickets these days (punitive!), I had to make a list of reasons for and against. First up…

Reasons to see this movie:

It looks pretty cool. If nothing else, it would be interesting to see what the updated special effects amount to. The old movie contained many instances of animatronics that didn’t look too realistic. Personally, I’d like to see if the CGI looks better.
Clearly, the technology has been updated, and includes flying cars, robot policemen and cooler weapons.
The trailers seem to indicate an apparent loyalty to the old storyline, even if it’s not a scene for scene remake. This is good seeing as how the plot was the original movie’s biggest strength, in my opinion.

Okay, not bad, not bad. But if I comb through these points, I notice that curiosity and the allure of eye candy – special effects, not Jessica Biel or Beckinsale! – are pretty much the only reason. I would like to see what they do with the storyline, but it’s not like there are going to be any surprises.

Reasons to wait for the DVD:

If the movie IS loyal to the original, then couldn’t it just as easily be argued that it’s not worth the theater price?
The original was based on a PKD short story named “We Can Remember It for You Wholesale”, which the screen writers altered and expanded upon greatly. So the updated version isn’t really a re-imagining of a classic sci-fi story, but of a popular movie.
I get the feeling the only reason they made this movie is because Hollywood producers have gotten incredibly lazy and would rather pull a Lucas (aka. redoing an old movie with updated special effects) than make anything new.

Huh… perfectly good counter-points. If I did see this movie, it wouldn’t out of loyalty to Philip K. Dick, but rather than some dudes who worked for the Hollywood machine. And what the hell have they done for me? Okay, they did give me Blade Runner, 2001, the Star Wars trilogy, the Back to the Future trilogy, Alien, Aliens, Terminator 1 and 2, Serenity, and the Matrix… but what have they done for me LATELY?

Well, that’s my appraisal of it, at any rate. Luckily, I’ve been doing some reading today that says there are a whole slew of movies coming out in 2012 that are not remakes, reboots, or re-imaginings. And some of these are well overdue, as far as fans of classic science fiction are concerned. Of that, more later. In the meantime, check out the updated trailer. Note the absence of actual boobs…

The Post-Apocalypse in Sci-Fi

Thanks to the announcement of “Revolution”, and my impending lawsuit against NBC, JJ Abrams and anyone else who ripped me off, I’ve been thinking a lot about post-apocalyptic stories. This is a very fertile area, and some friends here once again had the foresight to mention examples in advance which I was sure to include. I tell ya, the more time I spend with people, talking about creative stuff, the more we seem to be on the same wavelength… creepy! I sense another story in the making, so I better patent it soon let someone try to steal it. You hear that NBC? PATENT PENDING!

Anyhoo, here is a list of all the post-apocalytpic tales I was able to find from over the years. As usual, this list is just a sampling of some of the ones I and other people have read, watched, and generally enjoyed. In truth, there are far too many examples to list. So, also as usual, any additional suggestions are welcome.

A Boy and His Dog:

This novella, and the 1974 movie which it inspired, takes place in an alternate timeline where JKF survived his assassination attempt and history followed a different course. For starters, instead of the space race, western society focused on the advancement of other technologies, such as household androids, ESP, telepathy, and even animal intelligence.

This new tech race intensified the Cold War, which resulted in WWIII breaking out. This war lasted for many years and was fought with conventional weapons, until a peace was brokered by the Vatican in 1983. After 25 years of uneasy truce and economic turmoil, WWIV broke out in 2007 and nuclear weapons were used, leaving the Earth desolated and scarred. As such, the story takes place in 2024, where the survivors are forced to forage and fight for survival and men outnumber women by a significant margin.

The main character is Vic, a young man who lost both parents in the war and never received any real education or upbringing. As such, his only real concern is gratifying his sexual urges. His companion is a wise-cracking telepathic dog named Blood, the result of genetic engineering in the previous century. While he depends on Vic for food, Vic depends on him for guidance and education, which he accepts only reluctantly.

The plot revolves around the couple’s discovery of a place that is known in myth as “Over the Hill” or “The Promised Land”, an underground colony that survived the nuclear war. Vic finds himself lured in because, in spite of their self-sufficiency, the colonists need sperm donors to keep their reproductive cycle going. He learns that a totalitarian council rules the place and maintains authority by “disappearing” anyone who resists them.

After meeting a young woman named Quilla, he becomes embroiled in a conspiracy to overthrow the council. She asks him, “Do you know what love is?”, something which he has never before pondered. The two have a short-lived affair, which seems to be out of necessity since she soon needs to escape when their conspiracy is foiled and her friends killed. They escape to the surface to find that Blood has nearly starved in his absence. In a twist ending, it is implied that Vic kills Quilla and cooks her flesh to save Blood. He contemplates the question she asked him, and concludes that “A boy loves his dog.”

Chock of full of dark humor, irony and a pretty low appraisal of human nature, a Boy and His Dog remains a cult-classic amongst cinema buffs and fans of the post-apocalyptic genre. Though it was by no means as commercially successful, amongst its fans it is right up there with films like Mad Max and other such classics.

The Hunger Games:

Following in the tradition of such greats as Brave New World and 1984, The Hunger Games presents us with the a world where apocalyptic evens have given rise to dystopia. Though it not fully specified what these events entailed, it seems relatively clear that it involved nuclear war or some kind of global fallout, possibly economic in nature. It is for this reason that a tyrannical government has taken over control of the 12 districts in the future, ruling the nation of Panem with an iron fist.

Naturally, this oppression involves both police action and forced deprivation, with people in “the capitol” enjoying a lavish, comfortable life while people in the districts live in varying degrees of poverty. However, the truest symbol of the capitol’s power comes in the form of the Hunger Games, a death-match style tournament where every district must send two “tributes” – young people who either teens or pre-teens – to compete for the prize.

The story focuses almost entirely on Katniss Everdeen’s trials as she is unleashed in the arena, trying to survive against the other competitors while at the same time outwitting the game masters. Through all of this, we are made aware of the relationship between the Games and Panem’s odd social structure, where favoritism is common and it is treated as entertainment. We also see how it is used to keep the population of Panem divided, in a state of fear, and otherwise distracted.

Combining gladiatorial combat with the concept of making the oppressed fight each other for the scraps from the head table, the games act as a form of dystopian social control and are also a very apt metaphor for teenage angst and coming of age! In the end, even those who survive are forever marked and must still fear for their lives, knowing that they are never entirely beyond the grasp of the capitol or the rulers who fear and oppress them.

Mad Max:

The franchise that made Mel Gibson’s career – may God have mercy on their souls! – Mad Max takes place in a post-apocalyptic Australia where law and order have broken down. As the franchise goes on, we learn that this was the result of a nuclear war which began after the world’s oil supplies ran out. As a result, gasoline is the most precious commodity of all, with roving bands of thugs and mercenaries fighting and raiding just so they can keep their vehicles running.

The story’s main character, Max Rockatansky, is part of the Main Force Patrol (MFP), a police force that is dedicated to maintaining order on the highways. After his family is murdered by gang members, he hijacks their fastest car and heads out on a personal mission of revenge. Having killed them all, he becomes a roamer, going from place to place in his V-8 Pursuit Special with only a dog as his companion.

In all subsequent movies, events focus on him becoming embroiled in adventures where he must help people in need, all the while looking out for himself as well. More often than not, his journeys take him to shantytowns that have been built around refineries, where small colonies of people are ruled by matriarchs, patriarchs, and are threatened by roaming hoards who want what they have.

In essence, Max’s journeys serve as a vehicle for the story which enable the audience to get a first hand look at what a post-apocalyptic landscape would look like. Key to this is the strange balance of modern and primitive, where gasoline engines, electrical appliances and guns co-exist with improvised weapons, brutal gangs, and lawlessness. All the while, you’ve got bands of people desperately seeking deliverance either in some fabled utopia or safe haven. In the end, the tone and feel of this movie set a new standard for apocalyptic movie making, one which has been imitated many times since.

On The Beach:

Next up is Nevil Shute’s classic tale of nuclear war and how Australia became the last remaining outpost of life and civilization. Published in 1957, during the height of the Cold War, this book was required reading when I was in school, and for good reason! Far from merely telling a tale of nuclear war and the fallout that resulted, it also delved into the psychology of the survivors, how they chose to live out their lives knowing that sooner or later, they would die like the rest.

Taking place in Australia, the story focuses on the lives of people and families who have relocated to the last safe place on Earth. This includes native Australians, ex-pats, and several American military officers who have fled south. Knowing that the Northern Hemisphere has been devastated and is now devoid of all life, the people initially resort to binge drinking and partying, but eventually turn to improving their lives through education, hobbies, and spending time with their families.

Things come to a head when a garbled Morse code reaches them from Seattle, prompting Towers (the American commander) and his fellow officers to mount a mission in their sub. When they arrive, they find that the signal, which is coming from an abandoned naval headquarters, is the result of a broken window sash swinging around and hitting a telegraph key. Their trip also determines that contrary to some hopes, radiation levels are not dissipating.

In the end, all services grind to a halt, people take their suicide pills, and Towers and his officers decide to sail their sub out to international waters and scuttle the ship. In the end, Towers chooses die still serving his country, and avoids having a romance with a woman (Moira) who loves him out of loyalty to his dead wife. The story ends with Moira watching from the beach, imagining him with her as she pops her suicide pill and dies.

What is most interesting about this story is not the plot per se, but the realistic tone it strikes. For starters, how the people of Australia and the government choose to confront the inevitability of death was told with a fair degree of understanding. Instead of looting, rioting, and generally resorting to barbarity, the people, by and large, choose to spend the time they have left enjoying themselves, being with family, and then ending it all painlessly. And the contrast between the people who chose to spend their time partying, versus the stalwart nature of Towers, was also a nice comparison, showing the range of reactions.

It is also interesting in how it speculates on how WWIII began. Rather than being the result of a stand-off between the US and the Soviets, the war began when second-parties, such as Albania and Italy, began bombing each other, forcing their allies to intervene. China and the Soviets even bombed each other when territorial disputes and the general chaos resulted in them invading one another. Thus, much like in WWI, we see a general state of war resulting from tangled alliances and arms races. Oh, the lessons of history…

Planet of the Apes:

Originally a novel that was published in 1963, this book went on to be adapted into film twice, first in 1968 and again in 2001. The story tells the tale of a group of explorers who go into deep space on an exploratory mission, but who end up finding a world where chimpanzees are capable of speech, build cities, wear clothing, and hunt humans for sport. In the end, the explorers flee back to Earth, only to discover that a similar fate has befallen it as well.

Ultimately, the story is being told in a note left by the protagonist, which is uncovered by a young couple who are taking a vacation in their space ship. It is only at the very end that it is revealed that they are intelligent apes, and they conclude that no human could have written this note, as they are not believed to be intelligent enough.

Though different in terms of its overall plot, much of the original story survived the movie adaptation. Here, the explorers were scientists who entered cryogenic sleep, hoping to wake up in a future where mankind was more evolved. Instead, they wake up to find that they are (seemingly) marooned on a mysterious planet where humans live in a primitive state and intelligent apes rule.

When they are attacked, all of the protagonist’s (Taylor, played by Charlton Heston) friend are killed, leaving him alone in a compound where humans are experimented on. He finds an unlikely ally in an ape named Zira who seeks to prove that humans are intelligent and hence worthy of rights (echoes of animal rights activists). All the while, Dr. Zaius, a conservative scientists, expresses strong doubts, though it is clear he is trying to bury Zira’s evidence.

In time, Taylor escapes with the help of the two scientists – Zira and Cornelius – who sought to prove his intelligence, and they flee to the Forbidden Zone. This taboo area contains a cave where Cornelius claims to have found the remains of a non-simian civilization a year earlier. They are intercepted by Zaius and some soldiers, but they manage to convince him to enter the cave and see what lies within. There, they find a number of artifacts, including a set of dentures, a pair of glasses, a heart valve, and (the real prize of the collection!) a talking doll.

Zaius reveals that he already knew of this, and that the Forbidden ZOne was once a paradise that human beings turned into a wasteland. He lets Taylor and his new female companion go, but orders the cave be destroyed and Zira and Cornellius brought back to stand trial for treason. Taylor travels up the coast and eventually reaches the remains of the Statue of Liberty and realizes the awful truth. His party never left Earth at all, but has entered a future where human civilization fell, most likely after a nuclear war, and apes have evolved to take their place.

Between the novel and the film adaptations, the evolutionary allegory is clear. Due to its inherent barbarity, human civilization is destroyed, its people fall into decline, and nature is left selecting from its predecessors to fill the void. In a sense, Boulle and the film adaptations his book inspired were mocking the idea of humanity seeing itself as being at the top of the evolutionary pyramid. In another way, they were demonstrating that the very excesses that make humanity corruptible (i.e. vanity, anthropocentrism) are not reserved to them.

The Postman:

This science fiction novel, written in 1985 by David Brin, tells the story of a post-apocalyptic United States where warlords rule the countryside and terrorize the local people. Enter into this a drifter who stumbles across the uniform of an old US Postal Services letter carrier and begins using it and a letter bag to bring hope to a small community.

Initially, he trades the letters in his mail bag for supplies, not intending to take part in a forgery. However, the letters give people hope that there is a “Restored United States of America”, which eventually leads him to maintain the illusion. He then stumbles upon a facility in Oregon State University where scientists are apparently pretending that an AI they built is still working, as a means to maintain people’s hope that knowledge and science are being kept alive.

Together, they face off against a group of ultra-survivalists who are moving south through the region. The Postman and the scientists join forces to fight them, and in the end find that the survivalists are being beaten back from the south as well, by armies bearing the standard of the State of California. Apparently, the intersection of these symbols, the letter, the scientists, and the state flag, act as a synthesis to show the path towards rebuilding the shattered nation.

This book is not only a celebrated example of a post-apocalyptic tale of hope and redemption; it’s also a fitting commentary on politics and ideology in the modern age. Many times over, the super-survivalist Nathan Holn is parodied in the book, with the survivalists of the story being called Holnists. It is even suggested that it was the followers of Holn who destroyed the government in the not-too-distant future, not nuclear war, biological agents, or even economic fallout. So in the end,  we learn that the nation is wrecked by brutal and ignorant minds, and saved by a combination of true patriots, keepers of knowledge, and those motivated to help their fellow man.

The movie adaptation that was released in 1997 did very poorly, with many critics seeing it as the latest in a string of flops for Kevin Costner. Having not seen the movie, I can’t comment on its quality either way. All I know is, it’s a shame given the value of the source material.

Second Variety:

This short story by Philip K Dick, which was adapted into the movie “Screamers”, deals with the line between artifice and authenticity and is set in a post-apocalyptic world. Hence, much like Do Androids Dream Of Electric Sheep?, it is all about machines that can impersonate humans and what happens when technical progress gets away from us.

Though the movie was set on a distant world, the original story takes place on Earth, where World War III has taken place and Soviet forces occupy much of the US. This has prompted the US to develop a race of self-replicating robots that tunnel underground and pop up to slice the enemy to pieces. After many years of death and brutality, where the machines have turned the entire countryside into a mess, the US government has relocated to the moon, leaving what forces they have left on the ground in a series of bunkers.

The story begins when a unexpected message arrives in the US camp from the other side, asking for a ceasefire. The commander heads out to the enemy bunker to speak with the soldiers, who claim that new breeds of robots that can imitate humans have infiltrated them. Apparently, the underground facility that is making the machines has been producing all kinds of upgrades, consistent with its autonomous nature and aim to create better killing machines.

Suspicion soon turns everyone against each other, and eventually only the commander and a lone woman make it back to his bunker. There, he finds that humanoid-machines have taken over the base. They fight their way free, and the commander determines that they must fly to the Moon base and alert the government that the machines are threatening to take over Earth. When they make it to an emergency craft, the commander finds that it has only one seat and gives it to the woman. Shortly after she flies away, he is attacked by a group of robots, many of which look exactly like her…

Basically, this story tells the tale of how desperation led to the creation of a technology that was so effective, it threatened to completely destroy humanity, friend and foe alike. Much like nuclear devices and biological weapons, the “varieties” of killing machines proved to be a breed of weapon that was designed to fight a war, but eventually turned and consumed its own makers.

The Stand:

Stephen King’s classic tale of mankind’s fall and redemption, all taking place against the backdrop of the American countryside. Written in 1978, this story is based on the now classic concept of a government super-virus that got out and wreaked havoc on society, and those survivors who were left to pick up the pieces. Adding to this the theme of the Rapture and a post-apocalyptic war between good and evil, this book was steeped in metaphor and was a fitting allegory about good and evil and the eventual redemption of humankind.

The story begins when a government facility suffers a fatal accident with the release of an influenza virus, a strain of super flu that is 99% infectious and fatal. Once it gets out, society begins to fall to pieces as everyone, including the government agents responsible for containment, become infected and die. Those who are left behind begin to be contacted in their dreams by one of two people, an old lady and a strange man, each telling them to make their way to one of two places.

The old lady, named Mother Abagail, clearly represents good and is inviting people to form a commune in Boulder, Colorado. The man, named Randall Flagg (who clearly represents the Devil) is bringing people to Las Vegas, where they are arming for an eventual war. In time, the two sides come together after a terrorist attack leaves several dead and Mother Abagail suffers a heart attack and dies. She asks that the main characters walk to Las Vegas to confront the evil there. They do, and become prisoners upon their arrival.

However, things come to a head when the Trashman, one of Flagg’s minions, shows up in the city with an atomic bomb. Obsessed with fire and having suffered a psychotic break, he seems intent to detonate the bomb. The heroes experience a vision where a hand composed of white light and the voice of Mother Abagail appears to them, telling them they will be delivered. The bomb detonates, and Las Vegas and all of Flagg’s followers are killed.

The story ends with the surviving heroes bringing the first post-apocalyptic baby into the world, a baby which is apparently immune to the super flu. With evil vanquished and the knowledge that subsequent generations will survive the plague, humanity’s future seems safe at last.

And that’s the first installment. Tune in again soon for part II, featuring more examples of post-apocalyptic tales. As I said, suggestions are welcome. Get em in before its too late!

Worlds of Babylon 5

This would be the fourth installment of my “Worlds Of” series, this time in honor of my favorite sci-fi show of all time. Like the show itself, the worlds that were featured here were richly detailed, multi-layered, and part of an intricate and cohesive universe. Though the show only lasted five seasons and the spin-off attempts failed, J.M. Straczynski was able to give most of the locales for his story a fair amount of treatment.

Centauri Prime:

The homeworld of the Centauri race and the seat of power for Republic. In ancient times, it was home to both the Centauri and the Xon, two sentient species that battled for thousands of years for control of the planet. Eventually, the Centauri exterminated the Xon, a victory which is celebrated annually with lavish feasts and celebrations. From these humble yet violent origins, the Centauri emerged to become the dominant power in the quadrant, conquering many races at their zenith, including the Narns.

Many locations of interest are to be found on Centauri Prime. These include the Royal Palace, home of the Royal Court and Centaurem, the Senate Building, the Great Temple, and the Imperial capitol. In the buildup to the Narn-Centauri war, the Royal Palace became the scene of intrigue as forces loyal to the puppet-Emperor Cartagia and Lord Refa began assassinating those who got in their way.

After the war was over, things once again became interesting as the mad Emperor made an Alliance with the Shadows and gave them the island of Cellini, hoping they would pay him back by making him a god. This alliance put the planet in danger, as the Vorlons had begun destroying any and all planets that were being used by the Shadows. In the end, Londo was forced to destroy Celini with tactical nukes to eliminate the Shadow vessels and prevent the Vorlons from destroying the planet.

Almost immediately after the war was over, the Drakh infiltrated Centauri Prime and began using it as their base of operations. After implicating the Centauri in a series of attacks on Alliance shipping, war was declared against the Republic. This war ended with the surrender of Centauri Prime after Narn and Drazi forces slipped into the system and began bombarding the surface with impunity. According to expanded sources, the planet would also be devastated when the Drakh were discovered and detonated a fusion bomb in the capitol to cover their escape.

Earth:

The homeworld of the human race and administrative center of the Earth Alliance. By 2258-62, when the show takes place, a number of changes have happened to the place we call home. For starters, the capitol of the EA is established in Geneva, the headquarters of which is known as Earthdome. It is from here that the President exercises authority over Earth and all the Earth Alliance’s colonies.

Every nation on the planet has joined as an administrative “consortium”, contributing members and money to the upkeep of government. Earth is also home to the Psi Corps, the institution that monitors and trains telepaths for the Earth Alliance. This place is also the home of the Psi Cops, the authorities who track down and arrest “rogue telepaths” – those who choose not to register or take suppressants.

Just prior to the Shadow War, President Clarke declared martial law, effectively ending democratic government on Earth. The colonies thenceforth were administered by armed force, and Clarke himself forged an Alliance between his office, the Shadows, and the Psi Corps. For years, he ruled with impunity, until a coalition led by Sheridan and the White Star fleet arrived at Earth in 2262. Rather than face overthrow, Clarke shot himself and programmed the planetary defensive network to obliterate the surface. The satellites were narrowly stopped by Sheridan’s fleet, thus saving Earth from being turned into “scorched Earth”.

During the Drakh War, Earth became exposed to a deadly plague. This bio-weapon was of Shadow design and introduced into the atmosphere by Drakh ships after they failed to destroy Earth with a Shadow planet-killer. After five years under quarantine, the Interstellar Alliance ship Excalibur discovered a cure and introduced it to Earth. The planet was saved! However, hints given at the end of season 5 indicate that 500 years after the formation of the Alliance, Earth was devastated in a terrible civil war, returning its inhabitants to a primitive level of development.

One million years after the formation of the Alliance, Earth was abandoned by the decedents of the human race, who had evolved to the point of transcendence. After downloading all historical records, the last of the human race left the system for the last time. The sun went supernova shortly thereafter, destroying everything in the system.

Epsilon 3:

The third planet of the Epsilon Indi system and the world that Babylon 5 sits in orbit of. Coincidentally, it is also home of the Great Machine, a subterranean alien artifact of immense power. Not much is known about the species that built it, as the last known inhabitants, outside of the current custodians, died out as a result of a religious schism or fled into deep space.

Thereafter, the Machine was maintained by Varus, one of the last of their species, with the help of ten assistants named Zathras. As he neared the end of his life, the machine began to break down, causing the planet to become geologically unstable. This in turn alerted some of the surviving Epsilonians who were looking for the planet in hyperspace. When they emerged, a confrontation ensued between the aliens, B5, an Earth Alliance cruiser.

This was resolved when Draal, a Minbari member of the religious caste, assumed control of the machine and used its defenses to destroy the invaders. He warned that anyone else attempting to possess the planet’s secrets would meet with the same fate, but later pledged his allegiance and the resources of the planet to Sheridan and Delenn’s alliance. This went beyond mere weapons, as the Great Machine was also capable of seeing through time and space, which was intrinsic in both finding other First Ones and uncovering proof of Clark’s conspiracy.

Aside from the Great Machine, Epsilon 3 also boasted an extensive underground city filled with many technical wonders. According to Commander Sinclair, these included computers the size of buildings and components that were miles in length. In season four, when B5 needed components to boost the signal of their “Voice of the Resistance” transmissions, they found what they needed on the planet below.

Narn:

According to Narn sources, Narn was once a fertile planet with lush rainforests and vast oceans. This changed when the Centauri arrived and occupied the planet for over 50 years. During this time, the planet was strip mined, ruthlessly exploited, and reduced to the status of a slave colony. Much damage was also done during the Narn war of resistance, as Centauri forces bombarded the surface from the orbit.

After the Narn’s proved victorious, efforts to restore the natural greenery were mounted. However, these apparently took a back seat to the need to equip the Narn regime’s military forces, a policy which demanded that this trend of exploitation continue. As a result, the planet’s climate remains,in the words of Londo: “dry, red, depressing.”

The bombardment of the Narn homeworld during the Narn-Centauri in season two didn’t help matters much either. After many hours of being pulverized from orbit with asteroids, most major cities were devastated, electricity and power grids were knocked out, and virtually all infrastructure was reduced to rubble. This also had the effect of kicking up massive amounts of dust into the atmosphere which caused terrible storms and made the climate colder and more harsh.

With the liberation of the Narn towards the end of the Shadow War, efforts to rebuild the planet once again began in earnest. This time, with the Interstellar Alliance and G’Kar’s influence as their guide, the Kah-Ri ensured that the needs of its citizens were their top priority. Thenceforth, attempts to rehabilitate the climate and rebuild infrastructure were placed ahead of revenge and military spending.

Minbar:

The homeworld of the Minbari Federation and their seat of government. As one of the older races in the quadrant, Minbar boasts some of the oldest cities, temples and buildings in the known universe. Most of these are built from indigenous crystal, contributing to the natural beauty of the surface. Colder than Earth’s climate and with stronger than normal gravity, the Minbari are a hearty race known for their strength and endurance.

It is here that the ancient capitol of the Minbari Federation is located. The towering triple-spired government palace is here, even though the Grey Council conducted its affairs from space. The Anla’Shock Temple of Temple of Varenni  are also to found in the capitol, the former being used by the Rangers and the latter being an ancient site where the castes would come together to select leaders during the time before Valen.

Another city of importance is Tuzanor, the home of Valen, the Anla’Shok training grounds where the Rangers receive their basic training, and home to the Interstellar Alliance once Delenn and Sheridan relocated it to Minbar. Just outside the city is the historic Mount H’Leya, where Valen, accompanied by a pair of Vorlons, delivered his holy ”Times to come” speech during the first Shadow War.

During 2261, shortly after the Shadow War, Minbar became embroiled in a brief civil war between the Religious and Warrior Castes. This was due to deep-seated divisions which had been exacerbated by the Earth-Minbar War and the destruction of the Grey Council. It ended when Delenn invited Shakiri to the Temple of Varenni, where they would both enter into the Wheel of Fire to demonstrate their willingness to sacrifice themselves. Shakiri withdrew, but Delenn did not, prompting Neroon to save her and sacrifice himself on behalf of her. Thereafter, Delenn indicated that the Grey Council would be dominated by the Worker Caste to prevent such wars from happening again.

Sigma 957:

The ancient homeworld of the Walkers, one of the First Ones who had left the galaxy after the First Shadow War. The name itself was given to them by the Narns, who’s regime was the closest government to border their world. Apparently, they named them as such because they considered the inhabitants to be giants, so great and powerful that it was best to keep out from underfoot!

In 2258, Catherine Sakai did a fly-by of the planet to search for trace elements. During her mission, a massive ship appeared off her bow and her ship was disabled. When she was rescued at the behest of Ambassor G’Kar, he told her simply “There are things in the universe billions of years older than either of our races. They are vast, timeless. And if they are aware of us at all, it is as little more than ants…and we have as much chance of communicating with them as an ant has with us. We know. We’ve tried. And we’ve learned we can either stay out from underfoot, or be stepped on.”

In season 3, during a visit to Epsilon 3 to see Draal, Ivanova was able to see this world and feel the “footprints” of the Walkers with the help of the Great Machine. This was the first indication that their alliance had as to the whereabouts of other First Ones. Shortly thereafter, Ivanova and Marcus traveled there aboard a White Star to make contact with the Walkers. After a strained conversation, Ivanova was able to secure their agreement to join their alliance.

Vorlon Homeworld:

Much like the Vorlon race itself, their homeworld is steeped in mystery. Throughout the B5 series, mentions are made of the planet the Vorlons call home, but no details are ever given beyond the limited testimony of Lyta Alexander. As the only human to witness the inner workings of the Vorlon culture, she found herself in a unique position, acting as a sort of bridge and ambassador. However, other than her, no one has ever seen their world and those who have tried have either been destroyed or disappeared without a trace.

As for Lyta Alexander, her voyage to the Vorlon homeworld took place shortly after she made contact with the mind of Ambassador Kosh and broke from the Psi Corps. After weeks of waiting on the edge of Vorlon space, she was eventually admitted after sending out a telepathic signal. When asked what it was like, she said simply “you wouldn’t believe me if I told you.”

However, some tidbits were given by Lyta as time went on. For one, it is revealed that the Vorlons possessed artifacts of immense power, which humanity and the younger races would only ever be entitled to once a million years had past. This was revealed after the Vorlons had left known space, but had thought to leave their automated border defenses in place and active. In addition, it was also here that Lyta witnessed the Vorlons extensive efforts to modify humans and other sentient’s to produce telepaths. This consisted of large facilities where hundreds of thousands of beings were kept in suspension tanks and either enhanced or modified to exhibit telepathic abilities in the first place.

Zhabar:

The homeworld and seat of power for the Drazi freehold, this planet was first shown in season five of B5 and played a rather important role in the plot. Noted for its hot, arid climate, the Drazi homeworld is also notorious for its crowded cities, narrow streets and small buildings with large vistas.

Much of this information comes from Garibaldi, who traveled here in 2262 on behalf of Alliance Covert Intelligence. According to Garibaldi’s contact on Zhabar, the curious architecture and city planning are throwbacks to earlier eras where the Drazi designed their cities to be impassable to siege engines. In addition, the small roomed architecture also harkens back to previous ages, when the Drazi lived predominantly outside.

After the Shadow War, this world became the focal point of much attention as Centauri agents infiltrated in order to kill Garibaldi’s contact. Though they failed to kill Garibaldi, his contact, and the Drakh-Centauri connection, remained a secret for some time. However, during a subsequent trip by Lyta and Dr. Franklin (at the behest of the Vir Cotto), they discovered that the Drazi were storing captured Shadow devices here. These devices were taken from destroyed Centauri vessels, and the Drazi were apparently hoping to keep them for themselves.

Z’ha’dum:

Much like the planet the Vorlons call home, the Shadow’s homeworld is also steeped in mystery. However, several people have walked in its surface or witnessed if from orbit and lived to tell the tale. For instance, the elusive man named Mr. Morden, who came to Z’ha’dum as part of the Icarus crew, enlisted with the Shadows and then became their chief representative to the younger races.

The second person to witness the planet was G’Kar, who travelled to the rim at the end of season 1 to investigate the destruction of the Narn outpost in Quadrant 37. He described the place as a dark world, “where nothing has walked for a thousand years”. His description proved quite apt, as the Shadows and their allies all lived underground in order to hide their presence.

The third and final visit came from John Sheridan, who had been forewarned by Kosh that if he went to Z’ha’dum, he would die. He was right, after a fashion. During his visit to their craggy world, he received a tour of their underground facilities and even a bird’s eye view of the capitol. Right before he blew it all away with two massive thermonuclear bombs and fell to his supposed death. But because he was saved by Lorien, the First One who lived within the planet for eons, his life was restored. As such, he was the only one to visit Z’ha’dum, outside of their willing servants, and live.

Speaking of Lorien, it is noteworthy to mention that for millions of years, Z’ha’dum was the place he called home. During his time with Sheridan, he explained that it was for this reason that the Shadows kept coming back there, out of respect for a First One that was even older than them. This would seem to indicate that Z’ha’dum was not in fact the Shadows homeworld, but merely a world they used as a base of operations whenever they returned to this part of the galaxy. But given their incredible age, this should not come as a surprise. Whether it was the Vorlons, the Shadows or any other First Ones, their true point of origin has probably been lost with time and forgotten by even them.

“Revolution” to premiere in 2012

A new show will be premiering this year, directed by Jon Favreau (who directed Iron Man 1 and 2) and executive producer JJ Abrams (who brought us the relaunch of Star Trek). Apparently, this show asks the question of what would happen if one day, all the electricity and electrical equipment in the world just shut off. In essence, this new show, named “Revolution” is all about the struggle to rebuild once civilization as we know it crashes and all our modern technology is rendered useless.

Hmmm. A show about a dystopian world where everything goes down and people are forced to survive by their wits? I call plagiarism on NBC! Anyone who’s been following my site or Story Time knows that this is the EXACT premise of Crashland. But whereas my story was all about infopocalypse and cyberwarfare, Abrams show seems to center on the idea of solar flares, EMPs being set off, or some such thing. Because God knows if he’s doing the whole “viruses crashed everything because everything was networked” concept like I did, I’m really gonna sue his ass!

But then again I imagine the producers of Battlestar Galactica might come knocking on my door… Damn! Can’t a man sue for plagiarism without falling prey to the whole “people in glass houses” thing? In any case, the real focus of the show is about what happens 15 years later when a group of people begin going about the process of rebuilding. This is predictably complicated due to the rise of warlords and criminals who have profited from the chaos.

A pretty straightforward premise, and not exactly new either. In fact, ever since the rise of industrialization and electricity, their have been no shortages of satirists and critics who have wondered what would happen if it all broke down. It was from this point onward that human beings became truly dependent on technologies that could be described as “prescriptive”, in the sense that they seemed to create needs and dependencies rather than address them. But this is why the concept of it all going down has remained relevant.

And if anything, its only increased in relevance as our dependence on electricity, electronic devices, and industrial products has grown by leasp and bounds. Today, it could even be said we have reached a stupefying level of dependence! Ah, but what can you do about it? Can’t imagine what I’d do without my gadgets. Probably pick up a gun and force people to bend to my will! Let’s keep those grids working people, you wouldn’t like me when I’m deprived and armed

Crashland – Chapter 13!

After about a week and a half on hiatus, I’ve finally returned to Story Time to pick up my serial novel of Crashland. Last time, things ended on a cliffhanger as the tube station Holden and his compatriots were hiding out in began to collapse. Still recovering from his injuries, Holden was forced to find his way down a dark tunnel while the others carried the cybernetic Simon out on a stretcher.

Unfortunately, Holden fell behind and got lost in the dark. His only hope was to either retreat back the way he came, try to navigate based on the glow tubes strewn about the tunnel, or just sit and wait for the trouble to pass. And of course, audiences voted and the choice was clear! Holden would try to navigate his way out the only way he could.

And now, chapter 13 is ready! Come on by and see what happens, then stick around to vote on the next chapter. I have to say that it is one of the most consequential chapters I’ve written yet! Yes, the ending is not only a cliffhanger, but a matter of life and death. When it’s done, one of the story’s characters will be killed off. Tune in to decide which one!

Anthology Sample!

Gliese 581 g, a real exoplanet where our story takes place

Hey all. As you may recall, me and my people over at Writer’s Worth have begun working on a new anthology. The concept is space travel and colonization, a phenomena which will most likely be taking place in this and the next century. After a lot of brainstorming and hard research, we have even been producing some first drafts.

The first is being written by Khaalidah Muhammed-Ali, the working mother and writer who I’ve mentioned a few times on this site. In her hands is the first story of the anthology, dealing with the families who are selected to take part in the off-world experiment. The second comes from Goran Zidar, another favorite here on my site, who is covering the topic of the terraformers who venture on ahead in order to prepare the planet for settlement.

And then there’s William J. Joel, another Writer’s Worth peer, who has volunteered to cover the daunting tale of the generational ships that will deliver the colonists to their new home. Already he has advanced some ideas which are complex and inspired, and personally I can’t wait to see some drafts. Between these three authors and a fourth installment dealing with exobiology, the first part of the novel is well underway!

And last, but hopefully not least, is my own contribution. As the opening chapter in Part II, it deals with the efforts of the colonists to create a planetary government. The story is told from the point of view of a synthetic named Winston, an AI who has been assigned to work with the planetary council. Programmed with an experimental social science known as “Ethical Calculus”, he will soon learn that working with humans is not nearly as difficult as getting them to work together!

Here is an excerpt from the story which I have tentatively named “Winston Agonistes”:

The sun was beginning to set, casting the sky into a deep orange. It was the time that the first settlers had called “the magic hour”, the many warm hours between dusk and dark. Winston stood at the dome wall and watched. On occasion, he cast a passing glance at his hands, which the glowing sun seemed to casting in the color of a light citrus fruit. He was sure he would find that amusing, if he could. He was sure there was much about this situation that would inspire an emotional reaction.

Alas, such was not the case. Though understandable to him, such things still remained inaccessible. Perhaps someday, with adequate upgrades in the available software…

“Mr. Winston?” a voice called to him from the doorway. The footsteps and tone of voice immediately indicated who it was. He put on a smile and turned to face him.

“Councilman Mutlu. How are you?”

“I’m fine, Mr. Winston,” he replied, entering the room. He looked around appraisingly, noting the furniture and layout. No doubt it all seemed excessive to him, but at the same time necessary. “I trust you are adjusting to your new surroundings?”

“Of course, Mr. Mutlu. I am settling in quite nicely.”

“Good, good,” he said, looking around awkwardly. Even without the ability to empathize, he could gauge the man’s discomfort. Then again, many people exhibited this reaction when in the company of a synthetic. In such circumstances, it was always best to focus on matters of a professional nature. At least that was what his subroutines told him.

“Would you care to sit down? I can offer you some refreshment as well if you so desire. Tea? Coffee?”

“Ah, tea, thank you.”

He busied himself with a tray of carafes and a heater as Mutlu took one of the chairs in front of his desk. He noted the sounds of shifting against the seat’s fabric, the way he kept moving his hands from one spot to the next. By the time the water had boiled in the heater and had located an appropriate tea from the stores, Mutlu seemed to have found a comfortable seated position. He approached him with all the assorted items on the tray that had been provided. He set it down between them on his desk and offered Mutlu a cup.

“The business of running a colony is quite stressful work, is it not Councilman?”

“Uh, yes, yes it is,” he said, taking the cup that was offered. “Have you had a chance to look over the proposals we have sent over.”

“I have indeed,” he said, taking the other cup and sitting back in his own chair. He knew this to be mere small talk, as the matter of processing those proposals had been a mere matter of dispensation. Assessing the nature of the problem, suggested measures, and weighing them according to the rubrics of his primary programming. Under the circumstances, asking such a question was completely inane, but in keeping with social norms.

“And what have you found?”

He took a sip from his cup before answering. “Quite simply, that the Council’s draft is in keeping with the best traditions of constitutionalism and humanism. That ensuring the rights of all citizens, regardless of their background prior to making the journey, is the most sensible course of approach. Ensuring that such a baseline exists at such an early stage is the wisest approach in both fostering amnesty between colonies while at the same guaranteeing that they submit to further negotiation.”

Mutlu looked down at his cup, back up again to his eyes. He seemed preoccupied with him performing this most basic function in front of him, but did not appear oblivious to his words. Eventually, he took another sip and smiled.

“Good. My colleagues will be most pleased to hear  that.”

He smiled in return. “Does the Council hold my endorsement in such high regard?”

Joviality. The gesture known as playful irony. Suggesting that the Councilor saw his approval as something very high indeed, a testament to his computational abilities. A gentle mockery of his obvious discomfort, meant to trigger a humorous response.

“Well yes…” he said, entirely serious. “I can only assume that you’ve subjected our hopes to proceed with a formal constitution to your… what did you call it again?”

“Ethical Calculus, sir.”

“Right!” Mutlu set his cup down and began to speak more freely. His hands began to provide gestures that accorded visual representation to his words. “After all, we’ve been subjected to a great deal of criticism from within and without, many people think we should be ironing out the basic agreements between colonies before we commit to any kind of draft that could commit us to policies down the road. I must say I find all those arguments…”

“Distasteful?” Winston suggested.  Mutlu nodded.

“Quite right… it seems a shameful thing that such cynicism has set into the process already. It’s almost as if they don’t think the colonists can…”

“Trust each other?”

Mutlu nodded again. He noticed a growing shimmer in the man’s eye. How quickly he was forgetting that the man sitting across from him was not a man at all.

“Exactly the point. And it’s not like we’re talking about disparate factions here. Everyone on this world came here with the same goal in mind. The same hope for a new beginning.”

“And yet, old habits die hard.”

Mutlu looked at him with surprise. “Are you saying you have doubts, then?”

Winston smiled as broadly as the muscle fibers in his face would permit.

“Purely an observation. Nevertheless, you and the Council are on the right track. You should take heart in that.”

“Excellent.” Mutlu retrieved his cup and began to look at curiously at Winston again. One more, it seemed that the knowledge of what he was dealing with was creeping back into his mind. But at least he seemed at ease. One by one, the Council seemed to be adjusting to the idea of having synthetics amongst them, entrusting their most precious decision making to them even. It was a significant step up from the laborious practices that the other models were forced to endure.

And that’s the story thus far. Stay tuned for more on the progress of this and other Writer’s Worth Anthologies. Speaking of which, Grim5Next, the dystopian anthology which began months ago, is coming along and getting into its third and final part. Progress!

A Tribute to Alan Turing

Wouldn’t you know it? Today marks what would have been Alan Turing’s 100th birthday. This man was not only immensely influential in the development of computer science and cryptanalysis, he is also considered the father of Artificial Intelligence. In fact, words like “algorithm” and “computation” are traced to him, as was the development of the “Turing machine” concept which has helped computer scientists to understand the limits of mechanical computation.

However, his reputation goes far beyond the field of computer science. During World War II, he worked at the Government Code and Cypher School (GCCS) at Bletchley Park, Britain’s codebreaking centre. For a time, he was acting head up Hut 8, the section responsible for breaking the Enigma Code, Germany’s wartime cypher which they used to encrypt all their communications. Were it not for this achievement, the Allies may very well have lost the war.

Especially in the Atlantic, where German U-boats were causing extensive losses in Allied shipping, Turing’s work proved to be the different between victory and defeat. By knowing the disposition and orders of the German fleet, crucial shipments of food, raw material, weapons and troops were able to make it across the Atlantic and keep Britain in the war. Eventually, the broken codes would also help the Allied navy to hunt down and eviscerate Germany’s fleet of subs.

After the war, he worked at the National Physical Laboratory in London, where he created one of the first designs for a stored-program computer, the ACE (Automatic Computing Engine). He named this in honor of Charles Babbage’s Difference Engine, a mathematical machine built a century before. This machine was the culmination of theoretical work which began in the mid 30′s and his experiences at Bletchley Park.

In 1948, he joined the Computing Laboratory at Manchester University, where he assisted fellow mathematician and codebreaker Max Newman in the development of the Manchester computers. Their work would eventually yield the world’s first stored-program computer, the world’s first computer to use transistors, and what was the world’s fastest computer at the time of its inauguration (in 1962).

He then switched for a time to emergent and theoretical field of mathematical biology, a science which was concerned with the mathematical representation, treatment and modeling of biological processes, using a variety of applied mathematical techniques and tools. This field has numerous applications in medicine, biology, and the proposed field of biotechnology. As always, the man was on the cutting edge!

In terms of Artificial Intelligence, Turing proposed that it might be possible one day to create a machine that was capable of replicating the same processes as the human mind. The “Turing Test” was a proposed way of testing this hypothesis, whereby a human test subject and computer would both be subjected to the same questions in a blind test. If the person administering the test could not differentiate between the answers that came from a person or a machine, then the machine could be accurately deemed as an “artificial intelligence”.

Tragically, his life ended in 1954, just weeks shy of his 42nd birthday. This was all due to the fact that Turing was gay and did not try to conceal this about himself. In 1952, after years of service with the British government, he was tried as a criminal for “indecency”, homesexuality being considered a crime at the time. In exchange for no jail time, he agreed to submit to female hormone treatment, which is tantamount to “chemical castration”. After a year of enduring this treatment, he committed suicide by ingesting cyanide.

In 2009, Prime Minister Gordon Brown issued a formal apology on behalf of the British government for “the appalling way he was treated”. Between his wartime contributions and ongoing influence in the field of computer science, mathematics, and the emerging fields of biotechnology, and artificial intelligence, Turing has left a lasting legacy. For example, at King’s College in Cambridge, the computer room is named after him in honor of his achievements and that fact that he was a student there in 1931 and a Fellow in 1935.

In Manchester, where Turing spent much of his life, many tributes have been in his honor. In 1994, a stretch of the Manchester city intermediate ring road was named “Alan Turing Way” while a bridge carrying this road was widened and renamed the Alan Turing Bridge. In 2001, a statue of Turing was unveiled in Sackville Park, which commemorates his work towards the end of his life. The statue shows Turing sitting on a bench, strategically located between the University of Manchester and the Canal Street gay village.

The commemorative plaque reads ‘Founder of Computer Science’ as it would appear if encoded by an Enigma machine: ‘IEKYF ROMSI ADXUO KVKZC GUBJ’. Another statue of Turing was unveiled in Bletchley Park in 2007, made out of approximately half a million pieces slate and showing the young Turing studying an Enigma machine. A commemorative English Heritage blue plaque was also mounted outside the house where Turing grew up in Wilmslow, Cheshire.

In literature, Turing’s name and persona have made several appearances. The 1986 play, Breaking the Code, was about Turing’s life, went from London’s West End to Broadway and won three Tony Awards. The 1996, the BBC television network produced a series on his life, starring Derek Jacobi in the leading role. In 2010, actor/playwright Jade Esteban Estrada portrayed Turing in the solo musical, ICONS: The Lesbian and Gay History of the World, Vol. 4. And, my personal favorite, he was featured heavily in Neal Stephenson’s 1999 novel Cryptonomicon.

Rest in peace Alan Turning. Like many geniuses, you were ahead of your time and destroyed by the very people you helped to educate and protect. I hope Galileo, Socrates, Oppenheimer and Tupac are there to keep you company! You have a lot to discuss, I’m sure

2012: the Year of Reboots

If you’ve been paying attention to the trailer circuit lately, you might have noticed some new previews making the rounds. A few weeks ago, it was the trailer for the reboot of Spider-Man, this time with the prefix “The Amazing”. Shortly thereafter, a new trailer came out previewing the relaunch of the 1990 movie Total Recall, this time starring Colin Farrell, Jessica Biel and Kate Beckinsale. And now, there’s a third trailer making the rounds. This last one previews a relaunch of the 1994 Judge Dredd, the one-time Stallone vehicle that will star sci-fi/fantasy veteran Karl Urban and Lena Headey, who’s fame is exploding due to her role as Cersei in Game of Thrones.

What do all these movies have in common? Well, for one, they are relaunches of relatively recent movies. Second, all these movies are scheduled for relaunch in 2012. That means for anyone old enough to have seen the originals, this summer is going to be jammed packed with remakes of movies they’ve already seen… I’m thinking Hollywood needs to just come out and admit that they have no new ideas left!

Now to be fair, some of these movies can get away with being remade. The original Total Recall came out 22 years ago, but for most people in my generation, it was a hit while we were tweens. I can’t imagine many people are going to be seeing it for more than the nostalgic appeal, even if it is packed with headliners. And you can just tell that casting it with Ferrell, Biel and Beckinsale and pitching it as a big FX romp was done to ensure it has a big draw. Still, expect people to comparing it endlessly to the Schwarzenegger original!

Dredd is even more recent, with most fans of the comic being the age of majority when it came out. But a relaunch of this movie seems good given that the last one was such a disappointment. But judging by the trailers, it seems like just another excuse to shoot something in 3D. The storyline also looks pretty contained, focusing on a single mission rather than the larger picture of Mega City One, the Judges and the irony of trusting quasi-fascists to bring order to a chaotic society.

And Spider-Man? Hell, the third movie in that trilogy aired just five years ago! And the original was produced when, in 2002? That’s just a ten year gap between this new one and the first of the originals! Isn’t there a statute of limitations on this kind of thing? Why does this movie even need to be remade, and now of all times? The others featured perfectly good CGI effects and good story lines, and was ably acted by Toby McGuire and Kirsten Dunst. And of course, most people seeing this one already saw all the others.

So really, what possible reason is there for making this version? I have heard some people speculate that it’s because they want to include Spider-Man in the next Avengers movie. So… what happened to Toby McGuire? Is he too old? Was he not returning the studios calls? Did he say there was no POSSIBLE way he’d ever do a Spider-Man movie again? Is that why they’re doing this, so people won’t be surprised when a new guy shows up to play Spidey in Avengers 2? That seems silly!

Oh Hollywood. When did you lose your way? Was it the money, the phoniness, the mountains and mountains of blow? Yeah, I’m betting somewhere between the money and the nose candy, you all just went a little batty and stopped being able to come up with new ideas. So here’s a few ideas. Hire some new people. Pitch to new writers. Try making something though-provoking and avant-garde. Do something other than throw up the same old formulaic crap and rebooting old concepts!

And before you make the excuse that audiences are stupid and won’t buy into something half-way decent and brainy, might I remind that you guys pioneered those low expectations in the first place? Were it not for you constantly trying to appeal to the lowest-common denominator, you wouldn’t be in this creative tailspin. You might say this trend is the end result of underestimating the intelligence of the average person for so very long. Them chickens roosting in your backyard seem to have brought a batch of avian flu with them! In short, Hollywood, back your shit up, get your shit together, and then get your shit off our floor!

Sorry, that got a little rant-y towards the end there. But for me, this is just the straw that broke the camels back. I’d like to see some better movies, and these guys are the one making it hard for independent producers and studios simply because they suck up so much money and produce so much PR. Still, I might see one of these movies. During Prometheus, my wife was more than impressed by the preview for Total Recall, so we’ll see. If I seem stupider once I get back, blame Hollywood!