Danny Mac's Blog, page 17
August 26, 2022
My Dog is a Karen!
Hello everyone,
Karen Gets into Trouble
A quiet Wednesday afternoon finds me at the computer typing out a new chapter in my next book. The creative juices flowing to my fingers pecking at the keys place the words in a mad fury on the screen. A thousand words mash into a story in one hour. It requires a lot of editing but the basic story fills the page.
We have two burgundy red high-back chairs, a couch, and a loveseat decorating our living room. My wife covers the sofas with a cover easily removed to clean the Ginger colored hair off it periodically. Two matching throw pillows that adorn the sofas fill on the cushions of the red chairs keeping the dog off them and her hair from collecting and redepositing on unsuspecting visitors.
Ginger with her full Karen disposition believes this to be an affront to who she is. It is her right as a Karen to leave her dog hair anywhere she wants it. Furthermore, we peasants living in the house with her should wear her hair proudly wherever we go to show her dominance over us. Guest visiting her home should feel privileged to leave with her mark of orange-red hair all over their clothes.
In fulfilling this mission statement, she wrenches the covers off the sofas several times and prefers sleeping on the red chairs. Well, mom likes spoiling her fur baby but draws the line at her sleeping on the uncovered chairs. Ginger acquires the bright idea to pull the cushions and the throw pillow off the chair and sleep on the floor with them.
I break from writing to see her snoozing comfortably half on the red cushion and half on the throw pillow. “Ohhh, you are going to get into trouble when mom sees what you did.”
“Grrrrrnnnn, Orrrrnnneeerr,” comes back at me.
A couple of minute’s later mom enters the living room to see her beloved dog sitting on the couch staring at the mess on the floor. “Who did this,” she rants glowering at her fur baby.
“Grrrrrnnnn, rrrrrummmm,” in defense of the indefensible.
As mom picks up the cushion and pillow, Ginger waddles her furry butt into the kitchen with a stare declaring it was my fault for not picking up the mess she made. That’s right folks, it was my fault she got into trouble with her mom even though she was the one that broke the rules of mom. I misunderstood her grumbling to me to clean up her mess before mom sees it.
Subscribe for alerts at my website: About | Danny Mac - Author (dannymacauthor.com)
God bless,
Danny Mac
Karen Gets into Trouble
A quiet Wednesday afternoon finds me at the computer typing out a new chapter in my next book. The creative juices flowing to my fingers pecking at the keys place the words in a mad fury on the screen. A thousand words mash into a story in one hour. It requires a lot of editing but the basic story fills the page.
We have two burgundy red high-back chairs, a couch, and a loveseat decorating our living room. My wife covers the sofas with a cover easily removed to clean the Ginger colored hair off it periodically. Two matching throw pillows that adorn the sofas fill on the cushions of the red chairs keeping the dog off them and her hair from collecting and redepositing on unsuspecting visitors.
Ginger with her full Karen disposition believes this to be an affront to who she is. It is her right as a Karen to leave her dog hair anywhere she wants it. Furthermore, we peasants living in the house with her should wear her hair proudly wherever we go to show her dominance over us. Guest visiting her home should feel privileged to leave with her mark of orange-red hair all over their clothes.
In fulfilling this mission statement, she wrenches the covers off the sofas several times and prefers sleeping on the red chairs. Well, mom likes spoiling her fur baby but draws the line at her sleeping on the uncovered chairs. Ginger acquires the bright idea to pull the cushions and the throw pillow off the chair and sleep on the floor with them.
I break from writing to see her snoozing comfortably half on the red cushion and half on the throw pillow. “Ohhh, you are going to get into trouble when mom sees what you did.”
“Grrrrrnnnn, Orrrrnnneeerr,” comes back at me.
A couple of minute’s later mom enters the living room to see her beloved dog sitting on the couch staring at the mess on the floor. “Who did this,” she rants glowering at her fur baby.
“Grrrrrnnnn, rrrrrummmm,” in defense of the indefensible.
As mom picks up the cushion and pillow, Ginger waddles her furry butt into the kitchen with a stare declaring it was my fault for not picking up the mess she made. That’s right folks, it was my fault she got into trouble with her mom even though she was the one that broke the rules of mom. I misunderstood her grumbling to me to clean up her mess before mom sees it.
Subscribe for alerts at my website: About | Danny Mac - Author (dannymacauthor.com)
God bless,
Danny Mac
August 19, 2022
A Very Karen Day
Hello everyone,
Tuesday starts off with the sun fighting through the clouds. My wife rises first taking Ginger with her. Meanwhile, I hover between dream and reality as I try to catch a few more Zs. I hear the door close to let our old dog outside for her morning business.
A few hours of dreams pass in the five minutes only to have reality bark into my next storyline. Our resident Karen finds her first complaint just after daybreak. She cannot stop for the injustice in her eyes is unparalleled.
We gather Ginger into the house to find two pickup trucks with smashed mirrors stopped in front of our house to sort out the details. The red truck pushes his broken glass from the driver’s door onto the pavement before they decide to move to a side street just out of sight which slows the howling of the irate Karen. As she finally calms down, the man from the red truck and the neighbor clean the glass in front of our drive which saves me from doing it after breakfast. This generates another round of barking at their audacity.
She shows her continual torment knowing they are nearby letting out a gruff every couple of minutes. A State Trooper slows in front which sets our Karen into another rage against the man until he disappears around the corner. All seems quiet when another car slows in front of our house with another five minutes of complaint howling echoing through the house.
Then mom checks the garden for tomatoes to make a salad for Small Group and Ginger rises to assist. While watching mom from the back deck, she spies the two dogs two doors down. Again, her rule is no other dogs are allowed in our neighborhood. She lets her wrath known to the world of the two dogs walking peaceably around their yard.
Every half hour Ginger discovers something new to voice her Karen complaints until we start cleaning for the guest coming over. Naturally with the typical Karen attitude, she puts herself in the middle of it. Grumbling at everyone getting in her way.
As five rolls around, we start setting the table and putting the final touches for a night of entertainment. Mom trips over the dog and wrenches her arm trying to keep her balance. Mom yells at her baby and Karen gives mom a look as if she should stay out of her way.
Only half the group shows up for Bible study with back-to-school and family problems keeping the others away. However, a proper Karen always expects all attention should go to her and the study operates around her groans and grumbles about being ignored. Ginger fulfills her mission of a total Karen for the entire day missing her twelve hours of naps.
Subscribe for alerts at my website: About | Danny Mac - Author (dannymacauthor.com)
God bless,
Danny Mac
Tuesday starts off with the sun fighting through the clouds. My wife rises first taking Ginger with her. Meanwhile, I hover between dream and reality as I try to catch a few more Zs. I hear the door close to let our old dog outside for her morning business.
A few hours of dreams pass in the five minutes only to have reality bark into my next storyline. Our resident Karen finds her first complaint just after daybreak. She cannot stop for the injustice in her eyes is unparalleled.
We gather Ginger into the house to find two pickup trucks with smashed mirrors stopped in front of our house to sort out the details. The red truck pushes his broken glass from the driver’s door onto the pavement before they decide to move to a side street just out of sight which slows the howling of the irate Karen. As she finally calms down, the man from the red truck and the neighbor clean the glass in front of our drive which saves me from doing it after breakfast. This generates another round of barking at their audacity.
She shows her continual torment knowing they are nearby letting out a gruff every couple of minutes. A State Trooper slows in front which sets our Karen into another rage against the man until he disappears around the corner. All seems quiet when another car slows in front of our house with another five minutes of complaint howling echoing through the house.
Then mom checks the garden for tomatoes to make a salad for Small Group and Ginger rises to assist. While watching mom from the back deck, she spies the two dogs two doors down. Again, her rule is no other dogs are allowed in our neighborhood. She lets her wrath known to the world of the two dogs walking peaceably around their yard.
Every half hour Ginger discovers something new to voice her Karen complaints until we start cleaning for the guest coming over. Naturally with the typical Karen attitude, she puts herself in the middle of it. Grumbling at everyone getting in her way.
As five rolls around, we start setting the table and putting the final touches for a night of entertainment. Mom trips over the dog and wrenches her arm trying to keep her balance. Mom yells at her baby and Karen gives mom a look as if she should stay out of her way.
Only half the group shows up for Bible study with back-to-school and family problems keeping the others away. However, a proper Karen always expects all attention should go to her and the study operates around her groans and grumbles about being ignored. Ginger fulfills her mission of a total Karen for the entire day missing her twelve hours of naps.
Subscribe for alerts at my website: About | Danny Mac - Author (dannymacauthor.com)
God bless,
Danny Mac
August 12, 2022
The Family Karen, Our Dog
Hello everyone,
Our family dog is a mutt of unknown origins. We suspect she carries genes from Ridgeback because of the darker red going down her back. Her ears remind us of a Bully or Boxer, but her snout resembles more of a Lab without the pouches. Her personality boasts a large portion of very hyperactivity and obstinate breeds.
Her short red-orange hair first reminds people of honey that gave her the name at the pound. A problem soon arrives with her presence in our house. My wife refers to my daughter and I as Honey and every time she calls us, the dog comes running. So, the first day home, I mention, “She is a ginger.” From that point forward her forever name remains Ginger.
Several times a day, the zoomies race her through the house at top speed. So, we send our ten-year-old daughter and Ginger to obedience training where they both learn to follow instructions. Ginger’s bouts of super energy and lack of attention make the training go very slowly. She barely passes puppy training. The teacher of thousands of dogs states he has not seen anything like her.
Her hyperactivity fads with time but her obstinate trait blossoms at the same time. As she approaches ten years of life, she remains the most hyper dog I ever met, she has calmed over the years. As she slows down, her stubborn streak increases. She soon follows commands only when there is something in it for her. Then the complaints start when things don’t go her way.
About her seventh birthday, she became a full-blown Karen entitled to all the special treatment and privileges devised in her mind. When we fail to meet her wants, we hear about her grievances from groans and grumbles to all-out shouting at us in a high-pitched screaming whine. If she reaches this top level of disdain, we receive the cold shoulder until the next mealtime. She always warms up to us when it is feeding time. A Karen can be very charming when they want something but become ogres when their wants are not met.
This is our dog and our life with a living breathing Karen. We remain vigilant not to upset her, but we still have to maintain the rules of the house such as not feeding her every time she feels hungry, which is all the time. The other day, my daughter feeds Ginger and ten minutes later mom comes downstairs. Ginger stares with sad hungry eyes after not eating for a month of Sundays.
“Did you feed Ginger?” hollers up the stairs.
“Even a bit more,” comes echoing down.
“You’ve been fed!” mom staring back at the forsaken face.
“Oarrrrn, Uggghhhh” comes back in a deep under-the-breath groan.
Subscribe for alerts at my website: About | Danny Mac - Author (dannymacauthor.com)
God bless,
Danny Mac
Our family dog is a mutt of unknown origins. We suspect she carries genes from Ridgeback because of the darker red going down her back. Her ears remind us of a Bully or Boxer, but her snout resembles more of a Lab without the pouches. Her personality boasts a large portion of very hyperactivity and obstinate breeds.
Her short red-orange hair first reminds people of honey that gave her the name at the pound. A problem soon arrives with her presence in our house. My wife refers to my daughter and I as Honey and every time she calls us, the dog comes running. So, the first day home, I mention, “She is a ginger.” From that point forward her forever name remains Ginger.
Several times a day, the zoomies race her through the house at top speed. So, we send our ten-year-old daughter and Ginger to obedience training where they both learn to follow instructions. Ginger’s bouts of super energy and lack of attention make the training go very slowly. She barely passes puppy training. The teacher of thousands of dogs states he has not seen anything like her.
Her hyperactivity fads with time but her obstinate trait blossoms at the same time. As she approaches ten years of life, she remains the most hyper dog I ever met, she has calmed over the years. As she slows down, her stubborn streak increases. She soon follows commands only when there is something in it for her. Then the complaints start when things don’t go her way.
About her seventh birthday, she became a full-blown Karen entitled to all the special treatment and privileges devised in her mind. When we fail to meet her wants, we hear about her grievances from groans and grumbles to all-out shouting at us in a high-pitched screaming whine. If she reaches this top level of disdain, we receive the cold shoulder until the next mealtime. She always warms up to us when it is feeding time. A Karen can be very charming when they want something but become ogres when their wants are not met.
This is our dog and our life with a living breathing Karen. We remain vigilant not to upset her, but we still have to maintain the rules of the house such as not feeding her every time she feels hungry, which is all the time. The other day, my daughter feeds Ginger and ten minutes later mom comes downstairs. Ginger stares with sad hungry eyes after not eating for a month of Sundays.
“Did you feed Ginger?” hollers up the stairs.
“Even a bit more,” comes echoing down.
“You’ve been fed!” mom staring back at the forsaken face.
“Oarrrrn, Uggghhhh” comes back in a deep under-the-breath groan.
Subscribe for alerts at my website: About | Danny Mac - Author (dannymacauthor.com)
God bless,
Danny Mac
August 5, 2022
Book Funnel, Month Two
Hello everyone,
July thirty-first ends the second month of my Book Funnel participation. I set up a spreadsheet to organize the promos. Yes, I am that kind of a nerd. The spreadsheet tracks the name, end date, number of days of the promo, number of books, number of clicks from my dear readers to the promo, and number of views of people searching the links to my books. Then two more columns to show the ratio of books to links and views to days. The final column expresses the leaders of the promos in order to see which promo’s host has the best viewer results.
Three hosts outshined the others by quite a bit. This gives me insight as to which promos to follow in the future. With the hope, that they have the same high results in the upcoming months. That being said, I sign up for August promos without seeing the final results from July, but this gives me two months of data for September. Being a numbers geek should help sales in the future.
July’s promos supply four book sales which are down by one from the first month. Only one of the promos has a better than poor views to days ratio. It is my hope August produces better sales numbers since I tried to find hosts with good ratios since the more views I receive, the better chance of creating a sale. I will keep everyone informed come the first Friday in September.
Did I mention my dog is a Karen? My daughter enjoyed 4-H in her younger years. Of the many things she tried, one was woodworking. She built a flower box, painted blue with white birds on it. She took second place at the county level and honorable mention at the state competition. It sits proudly on our living room coffee table to this day. (A little dad bragging)
In her second project, she built with less help from me a dog dish table. She read dogs digest better when eating their food elevated from the floor. Ginger received two stainless steel bowls as a pup. One for water and the other possessed bumps and grooves to slow down her eating. She cut two holes in the plywood and sanded them to fit. Then built the appropriate legs to raise the table to the perfect eating height.
Come feeding time, Ginger, our resident Karen beats on this table while grumbling, speaking harshly, and with a glare of total disdain for the length of time, it takes to scoop her food from the bin and place it in her dish. Mind you her food bin stays in the pantry because she possesses the knowledge to open the bin. This fact only adds to her tirade as her servants don’t move fast enough for her Karen wants.
Subscribe for alerts at my website: About | Danny Mac - Author (dannymacauthor.com)
God bless,
Danny Mac
July thirty-first ends the second month of my Book Funnel participation. I set up a spreadsheet to organize the promos. Yes, I am that kind of a nerd. The spreadsheet tracks the name, end date, number of days of the promo, number of books, number of clicks from my dear readers to the promo, and number of views of people searching the links to my books. Then two more columns to show the ratio of books to links and views to days. The final column expresses the leaders of the promos in order to see which promo’s host has the best viewer results.
Three hosts outshined the others by quite a bit. This gives me insight as to which promos to follow in the future. With the hope, that they have the same high results in the upcoming months. That being said, I sign up for August promos without seeing the final results from July, but this gives me two months of data for September. Being a numbers geek should help sales in the future.
July’s promos supply four book sales which are down by one from the first month. Only one of the promos has a better than poor views to days ratio. It is my hope August produces better sales numbers since I tried to find hosts with good ratios since the more views I receive, the better chance of creating a sale. I will keep everyone informed come the first Friday in September.
Did I mention my dog is a Karen? My daughter enjoyed 4-H in her younger years. Of the many things she tried, one was woodworking. She built a flower box, painted blue with white birds on it. She took second place at the county level and honorable mention at the state competition. It sits proudly on our living room coffee table to this day. (A little dad bragging)
In her second project, she built with less help from me a dog dish table. She read dogs digest better when eating their food elevated from the floor. Ginger received two stainless steel bowls as a pup. One for water and the other possessed bumps and grooves to slow down her eating. She cut two holes in the plywood and sanded them to fit. Then built the appropriate legs to raise the table to the perfect eating height.
Come feeding time, Ginger, our resident Karen beats on this table while grumbling, speaking harshly, and with a glare of total disdain for the length of time, it takes to scoop her food from the bin and place it in her dish. Mind you her food bin stays in the pantry because she possesses the knowledge to open the bin. This fact only adds to her tirade as her servants don’t move fast enough for her Karen wants.
Subscribe for alerts at my website: About | Danny Mac - Author (dannymacauthor.com)
God bless,
Danny Mac
July 29, 2022
Blame Me Again
Hello everyone,
Summer Saturdays find us setting a table at the local farmer’s market. My wife and daughter bake bread and muffins to sell along with our homemade dog treats. I portion a small part of the table to display my books and have sold a couple so far this summer. This past Saturday my wife previews the garden for fresh vegetables to sell but sees the rain falling from the sky. “It’s raining,” a disappointed voice calls out to no one in particular.
“It just a light sprinkle,” without looking up from the keyboard.
Her struggle to slip her shoes onto her feet distracts me for a moment and then she exits out the patio door. I create two more chapters for my next book when the patio door burst wide open, “It’s pouring,” screams at me.
She doesn’t say it, but the fault the rain decided to quadruple in intensity fell squarely on me. The cucumbers hit the counter with clunks as the annoyance transferred to me. For the record, I didn’t tell her to go, nor tell her it would remain a drizzle. Yet, somehow or another, it was my fault the rain drenched her in a sudden downpour as if I personally turned the spigot to increase the rain. Maybe shouldn’t have chuckled upon seeing my water-logged wife?
Did I mention my dog is a Karen? As many of you might have noticed, there was no Karen story last week. My wife read the post and found it amusing. With our dog half asleep next to her, “There is no story about Ginger.”
I jumped at the protest, “Arrr Arrr, Rooo-grrr, Roooo-er-roooo” as she spins with indignation.
Normally when we read stories about her being a Karen, we get groans and grunts stating, “Lies, untrue, and exaggerations.” The response to not having anything said about her translates to “How dare you do not talk about me. Don’t you know how important I am?”
She wanted nothing to do with me for an hour as she held a grudge for being ignored. I went to scratch her head only to have her walk away from my attention. I discovered last week that the only thing our Karen hates more than me telling on her, is not mentioning her at all. For the sake of harmony in the house, I will have a new Karen story every week. For the record, I already have a good Karen story for next week. This report to her got me a tail wag and a groan.
Subscribe for alerts at my website: About | Danny Mac - Author (dannymacauthor.com)
God bless,
Danny Mac
Summer Saturdays find us setting a table at the local farmer’s market. My wife and daughter bake bread and muffins to sell along with our homemade dog treats. I portion a small part of the table to display my books and have sold a couple so far this summer. This past Saturday my wife previews the garden for fresh vegetables to sell but sees the rain falling from the sky. “It’s raining,” a disappointed voice calls out to no one in particular.
“It just a light sprinkle,” without looking up from the keyboard.
Her struggle to slip her shoes onto her feet distracts me for a moment and then she exits out the patio door. I create two more chapters for my next book when the patio door burst wide open, “It’s pouring,” screams at me.
She doesn’t say it, but the fault the rain decided to quadruple in intensity fell squarely on me. The cucumbers hit the counter with clunks as the annoyance transferred to me. For the record, I didn’t tell her to go, nor tell her it would remain a drizzle. Yet, somehow or another, it was my fault the rain drenched her in a sudden downpour as if I personally turned the spigot to increase the rain. Maybe shouldn’t have chuckled upon seeing my water-logged wife?
Did I mention my dog is a Karen? As many of you might have noticed, there was no Karen story last week. My wife read the post and found it amusing. With our dog half asleep next to her, “There is no story about Ginger.”
I jumped at the protest, “Arrr Arrr, Rooo-grrr, Roooo-er-roooo” as she spins with indignation.
Normally when we read stories about her being a Karen, we get groans and grunts stating, “Lies, untrue, and exaggerations.” The response to not having anything said about her translates to “How dare you do not talk about me. Don’t you know how important I am?”
She wanted nothing to do with me for an hour as she held a grudge for being ignored. I went to scratch her head only to have her walk away from my attention. I discovered last week that the only thing our Karen hates more than me telling on her, is not mentioning her at all. For the sake of harmony in the house, I will have a new Karen story every week. For the record, I already have a good Karen story for next week. This report to her got me a tail wag and a groan.
Subscribe for alerts at my website: About | Danny Mac - Author (dannymacauthor.com)
God bless,
Danny Mac
July 22, 2022
The Blame Falls on Me
Hello everyone,
For the past three months, my bride of twenty-eight years pops out to the front porch to check on things on a regular basis. About once a week her ability to reenter through the front door becomes barred because someone locked the bottom lock. The deadbolt remains locked at all times unless it’s in use. The door latch doesn’t need locking because she doesn’t like dealing with it and it is not very secure compared to the deadbolt.
Once a week for three months, she walks around the house to the back door and blames me for the front door rejecting her from entering. “I have not locked the bottom in two years,” I exclaim.
“You are the only one who locks doors in this house,” blamed back at me.
Tuesday nights host our small Group including a young family of eight and five-year-old girls with a two-year-old boy. The boy boasts blond hair and an angelic face. As they are preparing to leave, this sweet baby moves toward the door and turns the lock from horizontal to vertical without even trying.
Watching in amazement, I scream, “You are the one getting me into trouble.” Then explain to his father how I get blamed for him locking the door. As my wife plays with the girls in the front yard, I tell her to stop blaming me for the boy locking the door. She points out his innocent face and denies his culpability in her entrapment.
The discussion wanders past the guest leaving and our nineteen-year-old comes down to the kitchen and I vindicate myself to her looking for moral support.
“I lock the bottom lock all the time,” flows out of her mouth.
“What, I’ve been blaming your dad for it.”
“Why don’t you check it before going out?” in a sassy teenage voice.
Beaming with pride for my daughter, “That’s what I’ve been saying all summer.”
Then realization settles in, “Wait, you allowed your mother to yell at me all summer for what you did. How could you throw dear ole dad under the bus like that? That was a whole train of English Double-Decker busses at that.”
She smiles and goes back to her room. It dawns on me, that she works the long game since early spring getting me in trouble and annoying her mother. She aggravates the two people who loved her the most for many months. Was this planned, I think to myself. Does my daughter possess the deviousness to play us or was it just a happen-chance occurrence? Either way, it made her grin a sinister smile and a twinkle in the eye with the results.
Subscribe for alerts at my website: About | Danny Mac - Author (dannymacauthor.com)
God bless,
Danny Mac
For the past three months, my bride of twenty-eight years pops out to the front porch to check on things on a regular basis. About once a week her ability to reenter through the front door becomes barred because someone locked the bottom lock. The deadbolt remains locked at all times unless it’s in use. The door latch doesn’t need locking because she doesn’t like dealing with it and it is not very secure compared to the deadbolt.
Once a week for three months, she walks around the house to the back door and blames me for the front door rejecting her from entering. “I have not locked the bottom in two years,” I exclaim.
“You are the only one who locks doors in this house,” blamed back at me.
Tuesday nights host our small Group including a young family of eight and five-year-old girls with a two-year-old boy. The boy boasts blond hair and an angelic face. As they are preparing to leave, this sweet baby moves toward the door and turns the lock from horizontal to vertical without even trying.
Watching in amazement, I scream, “You are the one getting me into trouble.” Then explain to his father how I get blamed for him locking the door. As my wife plays with the girls in the front yard, I tell her to stop blaming me for the boy locking the door. She points out his innocent face and denies his culpability in her entrapment.
The discussion wanders past the guest leaving and our nineteen-year-old comes down to the kitchen and I vindicate myself to her looking for moral support.
“I lock the bottom lock all the time,” flows out of her mouth.
“What, I’ve been blaming your dad for it.”
“Why don’t you check it before going out?” in a sassy teenage voice.
Beaming with pride for my daughter, “That’s what I’ve been saying all summer.”
Then realization settles in, “Wait, you allowed your mother to yell at me all summer for what you did. How could you throw dear ole dad under the bus like that? That was a whole train of English Double-Decker busses at that.”
She smiles and goes back to her room. It dawns on me, that she works the long game since early spring getting me in trouble and annoying her mother. She aggravates the two people who loved her the most for many months. Was this planned, I think to myself. Does my daughter possess the deviousness to play us or was it just a happen-chance occurrence? Either way, it made her grin a sinister smile and a twinkle in the eye with the results.
Subscribe for alerts at my website: About | Danny Mac - Author (dannymacauthor.com)
God bless,
Danny Mac
July 15, 2022
Harmonized with Wife
Hello everyone,
The other day, my loving wife reminded me to pick an item from the store as the thought was bouncing around my head. I asked, “Why don’t you ever remind me when I don’t remember it for it was on my mind.” She laughed, “It’s my job to remind you.”
The next morning, I asked her to open the front windows as I typed some edits into my next book. “Where do you think I’m heading and what I am doing?” was her curt response. It seemed like great minds think alike.
Yesterday, we went grocery shopping. Taking our usual way home, “Isn’t the bridge still out?”
“Oh Crap, why don’t you remind me before the point of no return,” in frustration.
We turned around and headed back to the detour and I thought about how synced we are.
On the bright side, twenty-eight years of marriage brings two strange beings into one identifiable unit who remind each other of important details. The downside, we are so connected after all the years together, we both forget at the same time. If one remembers, the other remembers. If one forgets, the other forgets. As it says in James, count it all good.
Did I mention my dog is a Karen? Well, it happened to me again. Karen, I mean our dog Ginger pulled one of her favorite moments on me. She runs down to the television room ahead of me. I naturally offer to let her out. Instead of the grateful thankyou face, I received a how I dare suppose she needs to go out look. A quick shake of her floppy ears and she sprinted up the stairs.
I took my cue and settled into my recliner whose seat perfectly matched my behind. Just as my feet reached the upright position, I heard the patter of paws coming down the steps. Then the impatient and petulant moans and groans emanated from my dog wanting out. I looked over to the door and our loving pet stared back, “I’M WAITING!” as the Jeopardy theme radiated from the speakers. I rose to let her out and made it back for the introductions.
As luck would have it, she scratched to reenter the house as the first commercial started. “Ha, you came in during the commercial and didn’t interrupt my show,” boastfully exited my mouth. Ginger waited for Mayim Bialik to read the next answer. Instead of hearing the correct question, I heard the alert barking coming down from the top of the stairs overwhelming any responses. I climbed out of my chair again only to see our resident Karen run upstairs to complain to the manager, the mom of the house.
Subscribe for alerts at my website: About | Danny Mac - Author (dannymacauthor.com)
God bless,
Danny Mac
The other day, my loving wife reminded me to pick an item from the store as the thought was bouncing around my head. I asked, “Why don’t you ever remind me when I don’t remember it for it was on my mind.” She laughed, “It’s my job to remind you.”
The next morning, I asked her to open the front windows as I typed some edits into my next book. “Where do you think I’m heading and what I am doing?” was her curt response. It seemed like great minds think alike.
Yesterday, we went grocery shopping. Taking our usual way home, “Isn’t the bridge still out?”
“Oh Crap, why don’t you remind me before the point of no return,” in frustration.
We turned around and headed back to the detour and I thought about how synced we are.
On the bright side, twenty-eight years of marriage brings two strange beings into one identifiable unit who remind each other of important details. The downside, we are so connected after all the years together, we both forget at the same time. If one remembers, the other remembers. If one forgets, the other forgets. As it says in James, count it all good.
Did I mention my dog is a Karen? Well, it happened to me again. Karen, I mean our dog Ginger pulled one of her favorite moments on me. She runs down to the television room ahead of me. I naturally offer to let her out. Instead of the grateful thankyou face, I received a how I dare suppose she needs to go out look. A quick shake of her floppy ears and she sprinted up the stairs.
I took my cue and settled into my recliner whose seat perfectly matched my behind. Just as my feet reached the upright position, I heard the patter of paws coming down the steps. Then the impatient and petulant moans and groans emanated from my dog wanting out. I looked over to the door and our loving pet stared back, “I’M WAITING!” as the Jeopardy theme radiated from the speakers. I rose to let her out and made it back for the introductions.
As luck would have it, she scratched to reenter the house as the first commercial started. “Ha, you came in during the commercial and didn’t interrupt my show,” boastfully exited my mouth. Ginger waited for Mayim Bialik to read the next answer. Instead of hearing the correct question, I heard the alert barking coming down from the top of the stairs overwhelming any responses. I climbed out of my chair again only to see our resident Karen run upstairs to complain to the manager, the mom of the house.
Subscribe for alerts at my website: About | Danny Mac - Author (dannymacauthor.com)
God bless,
Danny Mac
July 8, 2022
Book Funnel, One Month
Hello everyone,
I ran ten promos during June, the first month of Book Funnel. This proved to be too much as my sharing over social media became water-downed over the month. July will have just four promos running at any time. This will allow me to increase the number of people coming to the promo through my links and therefore increase the number of people viewing my and my fellow author’s books.
I found the promos with less than fifteen listings did not fare as well. The promos with fifteen and fifty books in them tended to do the best with mixed results on promos featuring eighty to ninety-six books. It appears there are either a lot of people promoting the link or my books get lost in the vast number of books with few viewers.
I managed to sell seven books through the promos and from what I read this is normal. I can expect to do better as I learn to use Book Funnel better. Like most things in life, I can expect what I put into it but there is a learning curve.
Did I mention my dog is a Karen? A Karen must be the center of attention. We host Small Group on Tuesday where our isolated house fills with people. Of course, Ginger believes the people visited for her affection only. She showed off, mingled, and otherwise looked for everyone to pay attention to her.
This past Tuesday filled the house with the usual people plus the brother of one of the regulars. Ginger goes to every soul looking for pets, rubs, and pats. This week, her need for devotion from her admirers did not fill her needs. As we discussed from Col. 1:21-29, she starts whining and whimpering from a truly broken heart. The crocodile cry tried to melt the hearts of all in the room.
Then she goes to the family room and bangs her bell gratuitously loud to gain our consideration. Mom left the living room to let her out and Ginger ran upstairs to us again. I continued the study and she began whimpering like a wounded moose. I offered to let her out but she returned to the center of the guest-filled room. We picked up our discussion without showing her any concern.
Then she pulls a toy out of her box to squeak a response from everyone but the squeaker refused to make noise and the whimpering filled the room as a backdrop to our conversation. As we ignored her Karen-like attempt to hijack the purpose of the visit, she whined persistently. Mom attracted her with a treat to her two-legged sister’s room to rid the noise from our presence.
Subscribe for alerts at my website: About | Danny Mac - Author (dannymacauthor.com)
God bless,
Danny Mac
I ran ten promos during June, the first month of Book Funnel. This proved to be too much as my sharing over social media became water-downed over the month. July will have just four promos running at any time. This will allow me to increase the number of people coming to the promo through my links and therefore increase the number of people viewing my and my fellow author’s books.
I found the promos with less than fifteen listings did not fare as well. The promos with fifteen and fifty books in them tended to do the best with mixed results on promos featuring eighty to ninety-six books. It appears there are either a lot of people promoting the link or my books get lost in the vast number of books with few viewers.
I managed to sell seven books through the promos and from what I read this is normal. I can expect to do better as I learn to use Book Funnel better. Like most things in life, I can expect what I put into it but there is a learning curve.
Did I mention my dog is a Karen? A Karen must be the center of attention. We host Small Group on Tuesday where our isolated house fills with people. Of course, Ginger believes the people visited for her affection only. She showed off, mingled, and otherwise looked for everyone to pay attention to her.
This past Tuesday filled the house with the usual people plus the brother of one of the regulars. Ginger goes to every soul looking for pets, rubs, and pats. This week, her need for devotion from her admirers did not fill her needs. As we discussed from Col. 1:21-29, she starts whining and whimpering from a truly broken heart. The crocodile cry tried to melt the hearts of all in the room.
Then she goes to the family room and bangs her bell gratuitously loud to gain our consideration. Mom left the living room to let her out and Ginger ran upstairs to us again. I continued the study and she began whimpering like a wounded moose. I offered to let her out but she returned to the center of the guest-filled room. We picked up our discussion without showing her any concern.
Then she pulls a toy out of her box to squeak a response from everyone but the squeaker refused to make noise and the whimpering filled the room as a backdrop to our conversation. As we ignored her Karen-like attempt to hijack the purpose of the visit, she whined persistently. Mom attracted her with a treat to her two-legged sister’s room to rid the noise from our presence.
Subscribe for alerts at my website: About | Danny Mac - Author (dannymacauthor.com)
God bless,
Danny Mac
July 1, 2022
Her Dream, I’m in Trouble
Hello everyone,
While waiting for my morning tea the other day, my wife gripes, “I told you not to touch the rope and now your back is out. Why won’t you listen to me?”
I stretch my back and it feels fine, “What are you talking about?”
“In my dream, we went camping, and the line to the tent post needed to be secured. You tightened it even though I told you not to and your back went out.”
As everyone should know by reading my blogs our marriage is in its twenty-ninth year. These discussions happen several times a year and yet, each time it surprises me. I read other stories of husbands getting into trouble by their wives dreaming of something they did or didn’t do. Why men are responsible for the actions that take place in the wife’s nightmare?” Please respond, for I am looking for answers.
Did I mention my dog is a Karen? Tuesdays we host Small Group where five to ten people join us for dinner and Bible study. Ginger bathes in the attention of the familiar faces coming through the door. The queen of the house takes center stage. Naturally, during dinner, her famished face lies to everyone we are abusers for not feeding ever, even though she ate at four o’clock. Then the study begins, and she gives a forlorn look as if to say she had no love since the last blue moon.
This past Tuesday came with her usual lies to gain attention from everyone. She eventually settled and we held a very interesting discussion on Colossians 1:13-20. The study lasted until a quarter to nine and people began to file out. Ginger used our attention away from her and snuck out the front door. “Get your furry butt inside,” shouted from my mouth. To which I heard, “Don’t talk about your wife that way,” from behind me.
Our resident Karen gave me her classic “Catch me if you can,” stare then took off to investigate the new cars in our drive. She examined every one of them to be sure there was no malice. Her mom, my wife tried to chase her down, but our Karen is fleet of paws. Meanwhile, I ran to the refrigerator for some Ginger Snackies and shook the bag out the door. She sprinted back into the house.
Ginger Snackies are homemade dog cookies we sell on Saturday morning at the local farmer’s market. My wife askes last night, “What Karen story did you discover?” and I explain this one to her. Then short, disgruntled groan states, “Lies” came from the floor with Ginger’s eyes narrowed and furrowed at me.
Subscribe for alerts at my website: About | Danny Mac - Author (dannymacauthor.com)
God bless,
Danny Mac
While waiting for my morning tea the other day, my wife gripes, “I told you not to touch the rope and now your back is out. Why won’t you listen to me?”
I stretch my back and it feels fine, “What are you talking about?”
“In my dream, we went camping, and the line to the tent post needed to be secured. You tightened it even though I told you not to and your back went out.”
As everyone should know by reading my blogs our marriage is in its twenty-ninth year. These discussions happen several times a year and yet, each time it surprises me. I read other stories of husbands getting into trouble by their wives dreaming of something they did or didn’t do. Why men are responsible for the actions that take place in the wife’s nightmare?” Please respond, for I am looking for answers.
Did I mention my dog is a Karen? Tuesdays we host Small Group where five to ten people join us for dinner and Bible study. Ginger bathes in the attention of the familiar faces coming through the door. The queen of the house takes center stage. Naturally, during dinner, her famished face lies to everyone we are abusers for not feeding ever, even though she ate at four o’clock. Then the study begins, and she gives a forlorn look as if to say she had no love since the last blue moon.
This past Tuesday came with her usual lies to gain attention from everyone. She eventually settled and we held a very interesting discussion on Colossians 1:13-20. The study lasted until a quarter to nine and people began to file out. Ginger used our attention away from her and snuck out the front door. “Get your furry butt inside,” shouted from my mouth. To which I heard, “Don’t talk about your wife that way,” from behind me.
Our resident Karen gave me her classic “Catch me if you can,” stare then took off to investigate the new cars in our drive. She examined every one of them to be sure there was no malice. Her mom, my wife tried to chase her down, but our Karen is fleet of paws. Meanwhile, I ran to the refrigerator for some Ginger Snackies and shook the bag out the door. She sprinted back into the house.
Ginger Snackies are homemade dog cookies we sell on Saturday morning at the local farmer’s market. My wife askes last night, “What Karen story did you discover?” and I explain this one to her. Then short, disgruntled groan states, “Lies” came from the floor with Ginger’s eyes narrowed and furrowed at me.
Subscribe for alerts at my website: About | Danny Mac - Author (dannymacauthor.com)
God bless,
Danny Mac
June 24, 2022
Understanding Women
Hello everyone,
As mentioned many times in the past, the same woman has claimed me as her husband for over twenty-eight years. A plethora of ideas about women mapped my mind of what a woman wants before marrying my lovely bride. I can safely say, after everything we have been through, I understand women less today than I did before getting to know the best for me in an intimate fashion.
Studying the Bible for the past ten years allowed me to accept this reality because nowhere in the Bible does it require a man to understand a woman. If anything, it expounded on the problems we have. However, my reading of the Bible told me men should love their wives with caring and nurturing respect. Paul called me to love my wife the way Jesus loved the Church.
So even though I do not understand her ways and means at times, I am to lift her up in the sight of God, family, and friends. And yes, she still aggravates me to this day and my only consolation for this is, that I still infuriate her on a regular basis. It is only through the love we have for each other and our love for God do we find peace and happiness in our dysfunctional world. Love is a powerful antidote for the problems we face on this Earth.
Did I mention my dog is a Karen? A memory came up this past week of a post on Facebook from a few years ago. The original post emanated before realizing my dog was a Karen. I know now this post stemmed from her training to become a Karen for she had not reached her full Karen potential. Here is the FB post from several years ago.
Conversation with my four-legged child in the family room
Urgent child: Arrrooo Arrrooo Arrrrooo
Me: what?
Excited child: OOOrrrrruuuu
Me: is someone out there
Wild child: RRRuuu RRRuuuu
Me: OK (as I start to get up and let her out)
Impatient child: RRRRRROOOOOOOOOO
Me: I am not rushing just so you can bark at the other dog
Crazy child: RRRRRROOOOOOOOOO
Me: I’m coming
Irrational child: RRRRRROOOOOOOOOO
Me: I’ll get there when I get there
Disgruntled Child: ooorrrrruuuu
Me. Well sit and don't talk back
Entitled child: rrruuu Arrrrooo ooorrrrruuuu
(I hook up the leash and let her out)
Subscribe for alerts at my website: About | Danny Mac - Author (dannymacauthor.com)
God bless,
Danny Mac
As mentioned many times in the past, the same woman has claimed me as her husband for over twenty-eight years. A plethora of ideas about women mapped my mind of what a woman wants before marrying my lovely bride. I can safely say, after everything we have been through, I understand women less today than I did before getting to know the best for me in an intimate fashion.
Studying the Bible for the past ten years allowed me to accept this reality because nowhere in the Bible does it require a man to understand a woman. If anything, it expounded on the problems we have. However, my reading of the Bible told me men should love their wives with caring and nurturing respect. Paul called me to love my wife the way Jesus loved the Church.
So even though I do not understand her ways and means at times, I am to lift her up in the sight of God, family, and friends. And yes, she still aggravates me to this day and my only consolation for this is, that I still infuriate her on a regular basis. It is only through the love we have for each other and our love for God do we find peace and happiness in our dysfunctional world. Love is a powerful antidote for the problems we face on this Earth.
Did I mention my dog is a Karen? A memory came up this past week of a post on Facebook from a few years ago. The original post emanated before realizing my dog was a Karen. I know now this post stemmed from her training to become a Karen for she had not reached her full Karen potential. Here is the FB post from several years ago.
Conversation with my four-legged child in the family room
Urgent child: Arrrooo Arrrooo Arrrrooo
Me: what?
Excited child: OOOrrrrruuuu
Me: is someone out there
Wild child: RRRuuu RRRuuuu
Me: OK (as I start to get up and let her out)
Impatient child: RRRRRROOOOOOOOOO
Me: I am not rushing just so you can bark at the other dog
Crazy child: RRRRRROOOOOOOOOO
Me: I’m coming
Irrational child: RRRRRROOOOOOOOOO
Me: I’ll get there when I get there
Disgruntled Child: ooorrrrruuuu
Me. Well sit and don't talk back
Entitled child: rrruuu Arrrrooo ooorrrrruuuu
(I hook up the leash and let her out)
Subscribe for alerts at my website: About | Danny Mac - Author (dannymacauthor.com)
God bless,
Danny Mac
