Cardeno C.'s Blog, page 105

Ask Andrew - Spankng

Dear Andrew

This might be a weird ? But I always wondered so here it goes. Now am not saying everyone does this but some do. Why when men are making love does the person smack the guys ass he is making love too?

Thank you
Theresa

Dear Theresa

Your question really made me smile because in all my life I have never had anyone smack my ass during sex and it isn't something I particularly look forward to.  However, there are many people in this world with very varied sexual tastes.  I honestly cannot say how many people like a good butt slap during sex and the answer I am going to try to provide does not come from personal experience, so its harder for me to answer, but I will try.  I do have an idea that a lot of the world's butt slapping happens in films, but I could be wrong. 

As with most sexual practices, the butt slap or ass reddening, whatever you want to call it, comes from an attempt to heighten the stimulation and therefore the high achieved during sex.  I must stress that we are talking about open handed slaps here, not beating or hurting your partner.  These slaps generally aren't hard, but over time, the skin reddens and the nerves become more sensitive.  This sensitivity and the relatively mild pain that accompanies it, adds to the sexual endorphin rush. 

As for how pervasive the butt slap during sex is, I'm going to ask readers to comment and let me know.  This is something I'm curious about and would love to hear from you.  Leave a comment here or on Facebook. 

Hugs and Love
Andrew

Ask Andrew is your chance to ask questions of a gay romance author.  The questions can be about the writing process in general, writing sex scenes, gay men, sex, characters in romance, characters having sex... okay you probably get the picture.    I promise to answer your questions as frankly and with as much humor as I possibly can.

So if you have a question, please send it to andrewgreybooks@comcast.net.  This is different from my usual email so your questions don't get lost.  I will answer one question a week.

Please remember this is meant to be all in fun.  (I was going to say good, clean fun, but who wants that.)    So send me your questions and let's see what mischief we can get into.

Visit Andrew on Facebook:  https://www.facebook.com/andrewgreybooks  and you can join Andrew's fan group All The Way With Andrew Grey.

Follow him on Twitter:  @andrewgreybooks

Visit Andrew's web site:  www,andrewgreybooks.com

Exhaustion, Happloween, and Vegetable Porn

[21:00:29] <@BA> *waves*

[21:00:31] <@BA> So.

[21:00:33] <@BA> fucking.

[21:00:34] <julia> Hey

[21:00:35] <@BA> tired.

[21:00:43] <julia> <--- yes

[21:00:48] <Sean> Have you guys painted all the things?

[21:00:55] <julia> no

[21:00:56] <@BA> no

[21:00:59] <@BA> :(

[21:00:59] <julia> whimpers

[21:01:05] <@BA> come to help

[21:01:18] <@BA> we need to do lots

[21:01:32] <@BA> it's just not going as quick as we wanted. :(

[21:01:36] <julia> nods

[21:01:37] <Sean> nods

[21:01:38] <@BA> I mean, it's PRETTY

[21:01:41] <julia> very tired

[21:01:43] <Sean> it never does, does it?

[21:01:49] <@BA> I can't wait to show off the sun room

[21:01:53] <@BA> with SILVER PAINT

[21:02:27] <@BA> and, if I can swing it in the budget

[21:02:35] <@BA> we're getting a fire table for the back yard!

[21:02:41] <Sean> oh fun!

[21:02:45] <@BA> nods

[21:02:59] <@BA> it'll have a place for your drink

[21:03:05] <julia> we had to get something tallish

[21:03:05] <julia> for the bassets

[21:03:21] <@BA> I just want a neat place outside

[21:03:28] <@BA> to look at the mountains

[21:03:29] <Sean> nods

[21:04:10] <@BA> so, we made candy apple margaritas tonight

[21:04:17] <@BA> to go with steak and salad

[21:04:19] <Sean> any good?

[21:04:24] <@BA> not bad at all

[21:04:32] <@BA> next time, less lime more cinnamon

[21:04:39] <julia> yes

[21:04:45] <julia> it was a llittle too apple

[21:05:16] <@BA> Oh! I have an apple tree in the new backyard! I brought it back to eat.

[21:05:40] <Sean> that's very cool

[21:05:51] <julia> one apple

[21:05:56] <julia> not the tree

[21:06:00] <Sean> LOL

[21:06:05] <@BA> oh, shut up

[21:06:13] <julia> Cackles

[21:06:15] <@BA> did I mention the tired?

[21:06:29] <@BA> I feel like I've been beat on

[21:06:33] <Sean> awww

[21:06:42] <Sean> you need a masszge

[21:06:44] <julia> yeah

[21:06:47] <Sean> with less z

[21:06:59] <julia> too bad I'm too tired to give one

[21:08:25] <@BA> LOL

[21:08:28] <@BA> no shit

[21:08:37] <@BA> hell, I just need a fucking cup of coffee

[21:08:57] <@BA> *opens mouth and sends psychic vibes to the coffee maker*

[21:09:03] <@BA> I'll holler if it works

[21:09:11] <Sean> LOL

[21:11:20] BA leans and counts colors of paint speckles that have survived post shower

[21:11:22] <@BA> purple

[21:11:24] <@BA> cream

[21:11:28] <@BA> brown

[21:11:29] <@BA> silver

[21:11:45] <julia> LOL

[21:11:45] <Sean> polka dotted ba!

[21:11:54] <@BA>there's still blue, pink, red and turquoise to go

[21:11:52] <julia> sorry

[21:12:01] <julia> I think I blcked out for a minute

[21:12:03] <@BA> she fell asleep

[21:12:10] <@BA> it was adorable

[21:12:24] <Sean> cackles

[21:12:26] <@BA> and, honestly, more than a little impressive

[21:12:38] <@BA> given that the dogs have lots their damn minds

[21:12:46] <@BA> talk about stressed O.o

[21:12:49] <julia> they are loud

[21:12:58] <@BA> lots?

[21:12:58] <Sean> poor beasties

[21:13:01] <@BA> lost

[21:13:33] <@BA> spelling is my friend (which I typed at sleeping at first... Freudian slip?)

[21:14:01] <Sean> yep

[21:14:04] <Sean> very slippy

[21:14:41] <julia> are y'alll speaking english?

[21:15:11] <Sean> nope

[21:15:18] <@BA> not even a little

[21:15:21] <@BA> ;-)

[21:16:04] <@BA> Okay, so, Halloween Wars is back on Food Network. I'm stupidly excited.

[21:16:13] <Sean> oh fun

[21:16:25] <Sean> Halloween is Rock's favorite holiday

[21:16:30] <@BA> heeeeee

[21:16:50] <@BA> I know that Coke and Nattie dress the bulls up...

[21:18:10] <BA> O.o

[21:18:12] <Sean> he likes the little candy and he thinks Rig and Dick don't know he eats a ton of it

[21:18:27] <BA> Oh, I miss Halloween candy

[21:20:07] <BA> Actually, I miss Rock, too. ;-)

[21:20:18] <Sean> heeeee

[21:20:33] <BA> and there goes Julia

[21:20:35] <BA> O.o

[21:21:01] <Julia> I think the chat is telling us to be asleep

[21:21:03] <Julia> zzzzzzzz

[21:21:07] <Sean> lol

[21:21:08] <Sean> yeah

[21:21:35] <Sean> even those of us not moving house and painting are tired

[21:21:51] <BA> I wonder if your Jim ever dresses up like Carrot Top

[21:22:01] <Julia> Please God, no

[21:22:05] Sean looks at you

[21:22:09] <Sean> never

[21:22:15] <BA> @.@

[21:22:23] <BA> <--- that's my innocent look

[21:22:31] <Sean> uh-huh

[21:22:36] <Julia> no way

[21:22:39] <Sean> it's almost as believable as mine

[21:22:44] <BA> almost

[21:22:55] <Julia> the Bloodrose boys love Halloween

[21:23:05] <Julia> Jonny does a bang up party at the club

 

[21:23:57] <Sean> it's a requirement for vamps to like happloween, isn't it?

[21:24:03] <Sean> Halloween

[21:24:09] <Julia> not according to Buffy o.O

[21:24:14] <BA> happloween

[21:24:18] <BA> HAPPLOWEEN

[21:24:44] <BA> I declare that Oct. 31 will now be known as Happloween, dammit.

[21:24:59] <Julia> I like it!

[21:25:04] <Julia> What do we do with it

[21:25:27] <BA> there should be wine

[21:25:31] <BA> and chocolate

[21:25:43] <Julia> or do we just never have to say happy halloween again

[21:25:48] <Sean> and beer and chips

[21:25:59] <BA> and,  uh, carved pickles

[21:26:26] <Sean> only if we get to carve them into penises

[21:26:27] <Julia> instead of jack o piunkins?

[21:26:35] <Julia> punkins

[21:26:38] <BA> jack o' pickles

[21:26:44] <Julia> an, we're GOOD spellers

[21:26:54] <BA> indeed

[21:27:25] <BA> Poultrygeists

[21:27:32] <Sean> lol

[21:28:04] <BA> Chickens are scary

[21:28:06] <Sean> cluckityboooo

[21:28:28] BA cackles

[21:28:31] <Julia> dude

[21:28:41] <Julia> they were just fisting a pumpkin on halloween wars

[21:28:44] <Julia> happoween

[21:29:25] <Sean> even pumpkins need lots of lube when fisting

[21:29:27] <BA> Oh, Jesus. You said fisting. Sean's going to be all... you can fist a pumpkin?

[21:30:50] <Sean> I'm betting you can ;)

[21:31:00] <BA> I'm betting you've written it

[21:31:44] <Sean> can't say I have ever writing vegetable on vegetable sex

[21:31:48] <Sean> written

[21:32:01] <BA> Vegetable on vegetable sex

[21:32:10] <BA> the carrot porks the eggplant?

[21:32:56] <Sean> how about a parsnip/potato/tomato threesome?

[21:32:59] <BA> do you think the butternet squash ever gets laid?

[21:33:10] <BA> the tomato would never survive

[21:33:25] <Sean> maybe he's a voyeur

[21:33:29] <BA> maybe parsnip/potato/celery

[21:33:42] <BA> the tomato could rub up with the avocado

[21:33:50] <BA> nothing hard core

[21:33:54] <BA> ;-)

[21:34:34] <Julia> O.O

[21:34:37] <Julia> man, I doze off

[21:34:41] <BA> and then there's the onions

[21:34:46] <Julia> and y'all lose your minds

[21:34:51] <BA> if the garlic and onion get it on, is that incest?

[21:34:55] <Julia> better then moose porn, I guess

[21:35:07] <Sean> the onions are meanies -- they always make everyone cry

[21:35:07] <Julia> <than>

[21:35:12] <BA> and then, what about olives

[21:35:23] <Sean> they're already stuffed

[21:35:27] <BA> HA!

[21:35:31] <Julia> snort

[21:35:38] BA giggles madly

[21:35:44] <BA> very nice

[21:35:48] <Sean> vegetable porn

[21:35:51] <Julia> boom

[21:35:53] <Sean> bachickawowow

[21:36:27] <Julia> old MacDonald had a farm, e-i-e-i-oooooh

[21:36:38] <BA> no. just no.

[21:36:43] <Sean> lol

[21:36:46] <Julia> were horses

[21:36:51] <BA> I can tell that y'all are looking for trouble

[21:36:54] <BA> NO HORSES

[21:36:56] <BA> NONE.

[21:36:57] <BA> NO

[21:36:59] <Julia> heeeee

[21:37:05] <Julia> I knew that would happen

[21:37:08] <BA> I will beat you both with a wet noodle

[21:37:08] <Sean> lol

[21:37:15] <Sean> oooo beatings

[21:37:16] <Julia> dude

[21:37:33] <Julia> threaten Sean with something scary

[21:37:37] <BA> until you have had your arm in a horse up to the elbow, you can't judge

[21:38:04] <Julia> I have, but never a male one

[21:38:08] <Julia> so m/m is safe

[21:38:13] <BA> I'll just dangle flaccid penises to terrify

[21:38:23] <BA> I know where you sleep, J.

[21:38:47] <Sean> lolol

[21:39:27] <Julia> pphhppptttt

[21:39:36] <Julia> tonight I am asleep at my computer

[21:39:43] <BA> nods

[21:39:58] <BA> I think we might have to just stay here tomorrow

[21:40:15] <BA> take a day to work and not paint something

[21:40:33] <BA> go to the coffeeshop and drink all the things

[21:42:36] <BA> oh, happy Thanksgiving, ye olde Canadian!

[21:42:44] <Sean> not til next week

[21:42:58] <Sean> but thank you

[21:43:01] <BA> I know, but it's next Monday, right?

[21:43:05] <Sean> nods

[21:43:12] <BA> so the next chat is Tuesday

[21:43:20] <BA> which would be late

[21:43:28] <BA> so I'm early

[21:43:32] <BA> PRAISE ME

[21:43:34] <BA> ;-)

[21:43:40] <Sean> right

[21:43:40] <Sean> nods

[21:43:40] <Sean> you're right

[21:43:55] <Julia> good dog

[21:43:59] <BA> thank you

[21:44:03] <Sean> go you :)

[21:44:07] <Julia> Happoween

[21:44:17] <BA> every so often my ego is delicate *snorts*

[21:44:23] <BA> Fragile

[21:44:32] <BA> I'm a sensitive flower

[21:44:32] <Julia> a wilted flower

[21:45:37] <BA> I need a minion

[21:45:50] <BA> maybe we could all go in together and get one

[21:45:56] <Julia> sure

[21:46:33] <Sean> minions for all!

[21:46:35] <BA> I mean a real one, not a yellow cute one

[21:46:43] <BA> like someone that will do our bidding

[21:47:13] <BA> I could bid a lot

[21:47:19] <BA> like right now

[21:47:25] <BA> I still need coffee.

[21:48:11] <Julia> we should get you some

[21:48:15] <Julia> and let me doze

[21:48:21] <Julia> <.<

[21:48:27] <Sean> I could doze myself

[21:48:29] <Sean> we should say goodnight

[21:48:33] <Julia> >.>

[21:48:38] <BA> nodnods

[21:48:48] <Julia> we'll do better next week

[21:48:52] <Julia> ;)

[21:49:14] <BA> love y'all. *kisses*

[21:49:16] <Sean> goodnight

[21:49:21] <BA> night sweetpea

[21:49:30] <Julia> night!

 

If y’all have a topic you’d like us to chat on, please let us know. We’re totally up for that. You can find us on Twitter at @seanmichael09, @juliatalbot and @batortuga. 

 

 

Sean’s website is http://www.seanmichaelwrites.com 

 

Julia’s is http://www.juliatalbot.com

 

BA’s is http://www.batortuga.com

 

 

Facebook accounts:

 

Sean -- https://www.facebook.com/SeanMichaelWrites

 

Julia -- https://www.facebook.com/juliatalbotauthor

 

BA -- https://www.facebook.com/batortuga

 

 

Much love, y’all!

 

 

BA

 

 

September by Cardeno C.

Happy Monday! September is gone, baby gone so it’s time for my monthly writing recap.

McFarland's Farm, the first book in my new contemporary standalone novella grouping called Hope was released on September 10th.


I started promoting The Half of Us, a contemporary novel in my Family series being released on October 10th.









For Blue Mountain, the first book in my new wolf shifter standalone novella grouping called Pack: 
I finished working on edits with Jae Ashley, worked with Jay Aheer on an amazing cover, and worked with the always wonderful Kelly Shorten on the book design/formatting. The book will be released November 21st.

And then there’s the fun of a new book. I've been plugging away on a novel-length paranormal in what’ll be my new Siphon world.

Have a great week.

CC
www.cardenoc.com

Romance - fiction or not?

I’m about to share something with you that is very private.  Forgive me.  I need to tell you to explain my point.
My aunt died this week.  It was unexpected and we are awaiting results to find out the cause of her death.  It’s sad and the family has taken it hard.  But it’s the reactions of my uncles that got me thinking about romance stories.  My uncles are aged in their 60’s and 70’s, and after hearing the news they reacted in different ways.  Anger and lashing out.  Walking out the door and not returning for hours.  Numbness and not speaking to anyone for the rest of the day.  Getting in their car and just driving.
My mother broke down and cried when she heard the news.  Then she asked me through the tears, “Why?  Why are my brothers just walking away?”
I smiled sadly at her.  “Mum.  They are men.  They were never taught how to show their emotions.  They don’t know how to express themselves.”
Which brings me to my rumination –    is romance a reflection of real life, or not?
I spent my teens and 20’s reading Mills & Boon and the like.  Like them or hate them, you cannot disagree that they are successful as a genre.  You see them in Target with their own entire bookcase display.  They’re in every major retail store.  Women (and some men!) devour them.  I used to be one of them.  If I ever go back to university to study psychology, I’d love to do an indepth report on the change of the humble M&B novel.
I’ve read tens of thousands of them, and being on a budget, many of them were older ones picked up at second-hand stores for a bargain price.  But, on reflection of my breadth of reading, it is true that the good ol’ M&B is a great indicator of society.
A quick look at the remnants of my paperback library (I’ve had to donate 1000’s of books so that my children could have a bedroom instead of their mother having a book room) shows me the oldest M&B book I own was first published 15 years before I was born.  But I have a dozen or so favourites that were written in the late 1970s which I take as a gauge of society back then.  I love reading them with my 21st century eyes:  All men smoked – and a lot of time it was after sex.  Most men were 15 years older than the heroine of the story, and this was not considered abnormal enough to comment on within the story.   The women worked secretarial or nursing jobs if they worked at all.  But most importantly, the men were strong, forceful, unemotional and rather controlling.
The 1980s saw a surge of strong women appear in the M&B novels.  Women who needed an even stronger and more stubborn man to dominate them.  Every second women seemed to be a model, or an executive, and every woman “melted” when their man got all domineering.
The 1990’s is when I thought things got interesting.  There were a rush of “sheik” novels – the Arabian man with his flowing white robes and desert palaces, falling in love with the white woman who captured his heart.  In the 1990’s there was no terrorism, no Holy Wars, no fear of the Middle East.  There was a romantic outlook about the Eastern male who could (if he wanted) have six wives, and to whom people bowed and scraped.
Then the sheik novels began to morph into prince novels (and about this time I gave up on M&B in disgust).  But the men were rich and powerful princes from “lost” European countries.  Looking back on it now, I think the world was in love with Prince Fredrick of Denmark and Princess Mary (the ultimate Cinderella story).  But our “heroes” were still all powerful and pretty much showed no emotion to the outside world.
It is obvious that the M&B novels written, were written to appeal to the readers of that time.  So real or fiction?  Are M&B a reflection of what society was at that time, or fictional to what reader wantedit to be?
Every couple of weeks, the old argument arises on a blog somewhere about whether m/m romance accurately describes a gay man’s life today.  There is always a reader questioning the condom use in sex scenes, the monogamy of a gay relationship or whether a character is simply a “chick with a dick.”  One obvious different between the male characters I read today, and the characters of the M&B novels of the 1970s, is emotion (hence the “chick with a dick” reference a lot of characters get).  The men in novels today show a full range of emotions.
So, the BIG question of the day for me is:                   romance – fiction or not?  
The men in fiction have changed in 40 years, but is it a true reflection of today’s society?  
Have we, as a culture, given men permission to feel emotion and show it without shame?  Do we now like when our men cry if they need to?
My father once told me that the first time in his life that he cried, was at his mother’s funeral.  Since my dad was about 55 at the time, this was very sad for me to hear that he’d spent 50+ years without “allowing” himself to outwardly show his grief, despair or happiness with tears.  As for my uncles?  They will probably bottle it up and push it down as they were shown to do as a young boy. 
But my son?  I hope he feels able to show the full spectrum of emotion as the men we read about in our m/m fiction.

So what do you think?            Romance – fiction or not?
How to contact Renae:
Email:  renaekaye@iinet.net.au
Website:  www.renaekaye.weebly.com
FB:  www.facebook.com/renae.kaye.9
Twitter:  @renaekkaye

Announcing My New Novella; “Derek”

This December my new novella, “Derek,” will be released. And guess what? It will be FREE.
And it’s not a short story either. I don’t know just what the page count will be since I haven’t seen the galley yet, but it’s a good length. It is an original story, introducing two new characters. But also you will see cameo appearances by a number of characters from previous stories. I feel very honored that Dreamspinner Press is willing to do this. In fact they’ve been more than willing. They’ve done what any publisher does when presented with a manuscript, including multiple edits, layouts and more.
And part of that “more” is the cover, which was done by Paul Richmond. But what really excites me is that this is more step in my MM career. I designed the cover! And what really makes it shine is the excellent and amazing photography of Dave Suntown, who graciously licenced the picture to me for my use.
Upon seeing the model I was stunned at how much he was the man I had envisioned in my mind. OMG! I thought. That’s Derek!
So here it is! The cover of “Derek,” to be released this December as my gift, and Dreamspinner Press’s gift, to you! I hope you enjoy!
Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays (early),BG Thomas



Hey! You can find Dave Suntown’s blog here: http://www.suntownphoto.co.uk/blog  

And you can find his Facebook page here:  http://www.suntownphoto.co.uk/blog
He’s a wonderful photographer with work ranging from the sweet to the deeply erotic, depending on your taste! Enjoy!

Ask Andrew - More Extreme Activities

Dear Andrew

I read a lot mm bdsm novels  and one subject I rarely meet in romance novels is 'fisting.' I really cannot imagine this without wincing and a whole lot of fear. I really want to know what you think about this especially from someone whose works don't touch bdsm.
Hugs,
Johanna Dear Johanna I have to admit that I am not a practitioner of fisting and like you the thought makes me shudder.     The insertion an entire fist into my body is not going to happen.  However, I have to say that I have seen fisting done on screen and I can understand why it isn't done very often in romance novels, BDSM or not.  That isn't to say that it can't be done well because I know it has.  First thing fisting is not necessarily a BDSM activity.  It is a very extreme sexual practice.  It requires a great deal of preparation, trust, and let's face it... talent.   It also isn't spontaneous and tends to be messy, rubber sheets kind of messy.   At this point I think I had better add a few cautions.  I'm going to sound like a drug commercial for a second so please bear with me.  This should not be attempted by the inexperienced.  Protection in the form of gloves and gallons of lube as well as a lot of preparation must be used and performed.  Also I need to stress that this activity can be dangerous.  I really don't want to go into the details, but if you are truly interested, the internet is a wonderful thing.   Many years ago I had a friend who was into extreme sexual practices, including fisting.  He swore it was an almost ethereal experience for him and that he felt incredibly close and intimate with his partner at those times.  As I said earlier, this requires trust, a great deal of it and they had that in their relationship.   As for what I think of it.  Fisting isn't for me, but I firmly believe that everyone is different and has different likes.  As long as they are safe and understand the risks, then whatever floats your boat!  I want to add that if you are deciding to delve into this area, please talk to experienced people before hand and play safe! Hugs and LoveAndrew  Ask Andrew is your chance to ask questions of a gay romance author.  The questions can be about the writing process in general, writing sex scenes, gay men, sex, characters in romance, characters having sex... okay you probably get the picture.    I promise to answer your questions as frankly and with as much humor as I possibly can.

So if you have a question, please send it to andrewgreybooks@comcast.net.  This is different from my usual email so your questions don't get lost.  I will answer one question a week.

Please remember this is meant to be all in fun.  (I was going to say good, clean fun, but who wants that.)    So send me your questions and let's see what mischief we can get into.

Visit Andrew on Facebook:  https://www.facebook.com/andrewgreybooks  and you can join Andrew's fan group All The Way With Andrew Grey.

Follow him on Twitter:  @andrewgreybooks

Visit Andrew's web site:  www,andrewgreybooks.com

School Days, Swiffers and Bad Ideas

 

[20:03:23] <BA> Boo!

[20:03:32] <@Sean> Eeek!

[20:03:50] <julia> Yikes

[20:03:55] <julia> :D

[20:04:12] BA leans

[20:04:26] <BA> lord love a duck, what a busy day. Packing sucks!

[20:04:46] <@Sean> it does -- I hate moving so I'm glad it's not me

[20:05:47] <BA> :P

[20:05:52] <julia> But we'll own and not rent

[20:05:56] <julia> yay!

[20:06:09] <@Sean> nods -- that's very cool

[20:06:15] <@Sean> good for you guys

[20:06:24] <BA> Yay!

[20:06:53] <BA> Yeah, hopefully I'll be unpacked before you come.

[20:06:58] <BA> ;-)

[20:07:14] <@Sean> yeah, boxes are hard to sleep on

[20:07:26] <julia> LOL. The bassets do just fine

[20:07:32] <@Sean> LOL!

[20:07:45] <BA> grins

[20:07:47] <BA> so

[20:07:50] <BA> I had an idea

[20:07:54] <julia> oh no

[20:07:56] <@Sean> uhoh

[20:08:03] <@Sean> the most dangerous words ;)

[20:08:09] <BA> why does everybody ALWAYS say that?

[20:08:18] <julia> because it's always a neat idea

[20:08:24] <julia> but always means work ;)

[20:08:27] <@Sean> yep

[20:09:00] <BA> I was thinkin' that we could tell stories on school days for our characters

[20:09:11] <BA> like, Coke? Was an AWFUL student.

[20:09:28] <@Sean> heeee

[20:09:30] <BA> Awful, but he loves to read. Like now, he reads a book a day, easy.

[20:09:39] <@Sean> that's cool

[20:09:47] <@Sean> I love Coke

[20:09:52] <BA> me too!

[20:09:59] <julia> I like Coke. He's my second fav Roughstock boy

[20:10:14] <julia> Dillon being my first

[20:10:16] <julia> ;)

[20:10:16] <BA> He's getting a whole 'nother book where we find out about his history.

[20:10:23] <@Sean> oh too cool

[20:10:51] <BA> Dillon was/is great at math. He has an accounting degree. O.O

[20:11:01] <julia> The things we learn!

[20:11:03] <julia> Lesse

[20:11:12] <@Sean> poor man ;)

[20:11:16] <julia> Jonny from the Bloodrose never went to a school

[20:11:22] <julia> he had tutors

[20:11:45] <@Sean> he was always a rich dude, eh?

[20:12:06] <BA> He seems like he was private tutory

[20:12:20] <julia> he was pretty well off

[20:13:06] <julia> and Deke, the werewolf who does security with Kasey in the same series, he was too wolfy for traditional school

[20:13:15] <julia> kind of a homeschool deal

[20:13:23] <@Sean> heee

[20:13:27] <BA> DId he got to obedience school at PetSmart?

[20:13:32] <BA> go, even

[20:13:39] <@Sean> *cackles*

[20:13:42] <julia> cackles

[20:13:48] <julia> Sit. Stay.

[20:14:06] <BA> Roll over. Hump that other dog. Good boy!

[20:14:32] <julia> Nah, Deke doesn't hump other wolves

[20:14:39] <julia> He has a vamp fetish

[20:14:46] <BA> heeeeee!

[20:14:58] <julia> What about the Hammer boys, Sean?

[20:15:14] <@Sean> Billy was an A student

[20:15:27] <@Sean> Tanny got an A in truancy

[20:15:35] <BA> heeeee!

[20:15:40] <BA> Never say it!

[20:15:44] <julia> but I bet he did well in shop, right?

[20:15:49] <julia> since he works with his hands

[20:16:05] <@Sean> he just didn't learn the way they taught

[20:16:13] <julia> Poor Tannny

[20:16:17] <@Sean> yeah

[20:16:32] <@Sean> although he got Billy in the end, so probably not so much with the poor ;)

[20:16:38] <BA> :D

[20:16:42] <julia> Nodnods

[20:16:48] <julia> Go him!

[20:17:21] <@Sean> Jim was extremely conscientious and got high grades

[20:17:40] <@Sean> while Marcus was a numbers and dexterity man

[20:17:54] <@Sean> shop and math were his go tos

[20:18:02] <julia> grins

[20:18:24] <julia> if we go waaaay back to the Thatchers for me[20:18:31] <julia> Jed was a solid B guy

[20:18:47] <julia> Ken, the middle brother was a suck up and an A student

[20:18:54] <@Sean> LOL

[20:19:03] <BA> heeeee

[20:19:05] <julia> and Ross coasted with a very unrespectable 2.0 for a long time ;)

[20:19:12] <BA> Marcus. Dexerity. *giggles*

[20:19:26] <BA> Do not diss my baby Ross

[20:19:33] <BA> *snuggles him so hard*

[20:19:36] <julia> Oh hey, he's plenty smart

[20:19:40] <julia> just boooored

[20:19:47] <julia> why do you think he jumps out of planes?

[20:20:00] <@Sean> heeeee

[20:20:01] <BA> same reason Rigger does?

[20:20:14] <julia> <looks at Sean>

[20:20:27] <@Sean> to get to the marines of course!

[20:20:37] <julia> oh, yeah

[20:20:40] <BA> LOL!

[20:21:01] <@Sean> Rock is the surprising one of that bunch -- he was not a bad student

[20:21:19] <@Sean> whereas Dick was a little shit -- plenty smart but even more smartass

[20:21:30] <BA> Apropos of nothing -- we're watching this house hunty show and there's a dude that's terrified of the water wanting to move to the ocean...

[20:21:38] <@Sean> there's a reason he *had* to join up

[20:21:52] <BA> Dick is a bad, bad jarhead

[20:21:54] <BA> ;-)

[20:22:04] <julia> snort

[20:22:08] <@Sean> but he's a good, good lover

[20:22:20] <@Sean> poor Dick never gets the love[

20:22:21] <julia> Ross had that choice, you know? Army or jail

[20:22:42] <BA> Mike from Say Something was a good student, like doggedly solid, Jenson, not some much with that whole book learning thing, but he's not stupid

[20:22:48] <julia> He went Army to save his mom the horror ;)

[20:22:57] <BA> heeeee!

[20:23:00] <@Sean> lol

[20:23:01] <BA> *loves Nancy*

[20:24:06] <julia> thanks, hon. Mom Thatcher was my mom, really

[20:24:35] <@Sean> that's cool

[20:24:45] <BA> Yeah, I'm not sure my mom has appeared in a book yet -- although Ellen Redding has her mouth ;-)

[20:24:50] <julia> Oh! BA, what about my faves of yours?

[20:24:59] <julia> Sonny and MJ from the Road Trip series

[20:25:39] <BA> Sonny was on track for college, believe it or not, but he had that beaten out of him.

[20:25:42] <BA> MJ?

[20:25:44] <BA> Oh, y'all.

[20:26:54] <BA> He was like this Wile E. Coyote Super Genius kid. Got recruited super young. Had a PhD before he was an adult. He's like Spenser Reid from Criminal Minds, but sexy and pissed off.

[20:27:07] <BA> Spencer? Spenser?

[20:27:38] <BA> He was the best to write. So fucking wicked

[20:28:00] <@Sean> how fun

[20:28:16] <BA> I miss him. You know how that is? You have a character whose story has been told but...

[20:28:24] <@Sean> yeah, I hear that

[20:28:30] <BA> OMGIWANTTOWRITEHIMALLOVERAGAIN

[20:28:48] <@Sean> heeee

[20:29:37] <BA> I'd write MJ and Sonny again.

[20:29:44] <BA> in a heartbeat.

[20:30:57] <BA> *sighs* Okay, now I'm depressed. ;-)

[20:31:07] <BA> someone tell me something amazing

[20:31:49] <@Sean> your new book comes out tomorrow

[20:32:01] <BA> eeee!

[20:32:13] <julia> Yes!

[20:32:13] <BA> Or, in blog time, it came out yesterday.

[20:32:14] <BA> :D

[20:32:20] <julia> Mike and Jenson

[20:32:22] <@Sean> heee, right

[20:32:35] <julia> they broke me

[20:32:37] <julia> I sobbed

[20:32:41] <julia> I ranted

[20:32:44] <julia> I raved

[20:32:47] <julia> I adore them

[20:33:03] <@Sean> I haven't had a chance to read them yet

[20:33:10] <@Sean> but I have heard all about them :)

[20:33:22] <BA> They were hard -- Sean, I told you about them last year during a long drive and a snow storm, remember?

[20:33:25] <BA> ;-)

[20:33:28] <@Sean> nods

[20:33:30] <@Sean> yep

[20:33:30] <julia> I beta read it

[20:33:46] <BA> Also, you officially suck as a best friend. ;-)

[20:33:52] <@Sean> I know!

[20:33:56] <BA> LOLOL!

[20:34:09] <BA> *giggles madly*

[20:34:46] <@Sean> I'd promise to be better, but I'm not that organized

[20:35:29] <BA> *grins* I have embraced the bullet journal. I'm driving J out of her mind.

[20:36:02] <@Sean> this is that thing where you write all the thoughts down in point form as you have them?

[20:36:22] BA nods -- there's a website, hold on

[20:36:25] <@Sean> or is it a journal that's shaped like a bullet?

[20:36:34] <julia> rolls eyes at Sean

[20:36:38] <julia> you

[20:36:43] <julia> Canadian

[20:36:44] <@Sean> I can't resist!

[20:36:46] <BA> http://bulletjournal.com/

[20:37:01] <julia> I even have one O.O

[20:37:06] <BA> well, the worst part is you *know* that evil mind is going

[20:37:09] <BA> bullet

[20:37:20] <BA> butt plug

[20:37:27] <BA> kink

[20:37:31] <BA> boom

[20:37:31] <@Sean> nods

[20:37:46] <@Sean> it's true, I'd probably be way better at keeping a butt plug journal than a bullet journal

[20:38:08] <BA> bwahahahahaha!

[20:38:27] <BA> Day One: 1 inch diameter, plastic, 3 inches long

[20:38:39] <BA> Day Two: Steel, shaped like an ice cream cone

[20:38:53] <BA> Day Three: I think that was a trailer hitch...

[20:38:57] <@Sean> LOLOL

[20:39:22] <BA> Who knows you? ;-)

[20:39:54] <@Sean> nope, not me, I'm pure as the driven snow....

[20:39:58] <BA> Oh, man. Ice coffee rocks.

[20:40:05] <@Sean> okay, even I can't say it with a straight face

[20:40:12] <BA> Oh, bullshit. You're just Canadian so everyone believes that

[20:40:42] <BA> You blink innocently, throw in an 'eh' and it's all over

[20:40:52] <@Sean> cackles

[20:41:24] <BA> "What a dear. How charming. How very polite."

[20:41:54] <@Sean> yep

[20:41:58] <BA> and I'm going... Have you had a discussion about crowning with Sean? Like in a public place? Loudly?

[20:42:16] <@Sean> as long as they don't see what's on the hard drive I'm golden

[20:42:22] <@Sean> cackles

[20:42:42] <@Sean> loudly is the only way to have a public discussion about crowning

[20:42:47] <BA> fuck yes!

[20:42:51] <julia> Man, a girl goes to pee

[20:43:01] <julia> and y'all revert to kink

[20:43:12] <@Sean> you know you can't leave us alone

[20:43:12] <BA> That was early on, wasn't it? I laughed so hard I damn near wet myself.

[20:43:38] <@Sean> nods

[20:43:41] <@Sean> I couldn't breathe

[20:43:42] <julia> Go ahead and snicker about things that happened without me

[20:43:46] <julia> I see how it is ;)

[20:43:49] <BA> LOL!

[20:44:22] <julia> then again, BA and I had the time traveling butt plug

[20:44:41] <BA> yeah, that was an idea whose time never came

[20:44:47] <BA> (I said came)

[20:44:53] <@Sean> LOL

[20:44:57] <julia> chortles

[20:45:06] <julia> okay, clearly it's wine o'clock

[20:45:31] <BA> Oh! Sean! We made these drinks!

[20:45:48] <BA> Caramel apple vodka, pumpkin spice liqueur and apple cider

[20:45:50] <BA> OMG

[20:45:59] <BA> they're like apple heaven

[20:46:04] <BA> I could drink 12

[20:46:06] <@Sean> heeeee

[20:46:14] <BA> and then you'd have to peel my happy ass off the floor

[20:46:18] <@Sean> nods

[20:46:21] <BA> we'll have to make them when you're here

[20:46:29] <julia> I'd leave you for the centipedes

[20:46:35] <BA> Liar

[20:46:47] <BA> You saved me from the evil centipede of doom

[20:46:47] <@Sean> LOL

[20:46:49] <BA> I know

[20:47:14] <BA> of course, if I passed out, J'd be going -- *poke*

[20:47:19] <BA> *poke*

[20:47:20] <julia> I would

[20:47:26] <julia> she's not a passer outer

[20:47:30] <BA> "Don't make me use the swiffer"

[20:47:37] <@Sean> LOLOL

[20:47:50] <julia> the Swiffer is the best bug killer EVER!

[20:47:56] <BA> true story

[20:48:14] <BA> it can kill 3-4 crickets at a time

[20:48:27] <@Sean> crickets do not belong indoors

[20:48:34] <BA> no

[20:48:40] <BA> and we had an infestation

[20:48:52] <julia> OMG it was awful

[20:48:59] <@Sean> :P

[20:49:57] BA leans and snuggles. I guess we should say all the promo-y things.

[20:50:22] <BA> Say Something IS OUT AND IT'S SO GOOD Y'ALL GO READ IT AND WE'LL CRY TOGETHER OMG

[20:50:24] <BA> *ahem*

[20:50:34] <BA> Yeah, I have a new release. It's cool.

[20:50:41] <@Sean> *grins*

[20:51:18] <@Sean> very cool

[20:52:00] <@Sean> Bruised is available for early download at Totally Bound

[20:52:20] <@Sean> it's a reprint and it's nice to see it available again

[20:52:28] <BA> It has a neat cover.

[20:52:34] <@Sean> nods[

20:52:45] <@Sean> it does

[20:53:26] <julia> Uh. Blinks. I have Java Rocks coming out in the Dreamspinner writing anthology

[20:53:46]<julia> and I have a Full Moon Dating AND an Elemental Ops out in November

[20:53:57] <@Sean> cool!

[20:53:58] <BA> and we all have CEREUS!

[20:54:03] <julia> eeeee

[20:54:04] <julia> yes

[20:54:05] <BA> (write faster)

[20:54:06] <julia> :D

[20:54:14] <julia> tappity tappity

[20:54:18] <julia> going to write now

[20:54:19] <@Sean> that's October 17, right?

[20:54:22] <julia> waves and hugs

[20:54:34] <BA> nods. That's the plan.

[20:54:52] <@Sean> I can't wait to share my spirit bear and his slightly nutty human

[20:55:04] <BA> Love y'all. Can't wait for next week. *smooches*

[20:55:13] <@Sean> Night!

[20:55:20] <BA> I imagine next week's discussion will be "moving sucks"

[20:55:29] <@Sean> heeeee!

If y’all have a topic you’d like us to chat on, please let us know. We’re totally up for that. You can find us on Twitter at @seanmichael09, @juliatalbot and @batortuga. 

Sean’s website is http://www.seanmichaelwrites.com Julia’s is http://www.juliatalbot.comBA’s is http://www.batortuga.com
Facebook accounts:Sean -- https://www.facebook.com/SeanMichaelWritesJulia -- https://www.facebook.com/juliatalbotauthorBA -- https://www.facebook.com/batortuga
Much love, y’all!
BA

 

Loving My Facebook Group by Cardeno C.

Happy Monday! I wrote on here a bit about a new Facebook group I started but now that it's been up and running for a couple of weeks, I want to share more details. 

I started the group so that I could have a space to interact with readers and it has definitely accomplished that. The group format allows for a private space where group members can chat with each other. The chat with each other part has been really wonderful. It's not just me interacting, it's readers interacting with one another. 

The group has become a team effort and a fun atmosphere. We voted on a name together: Cardeno C.'s Cinderfuckingrellas based on this wonderful line from Pretty Woman. 

I've been able to get advice and input from group members when I have questions about what readers want. (Should I put my book on Kindle Unlimited so KU members can read it for free or do you want the option to buy it from retailers other than Amazon?)

Based on reader suggestions, we added theme days to help give people ideas about what to share and those have been really wonderful. Here are our themes for now (but we'll change them up every so often):

[image error] [image error] [image error]




If you're interested in joining the group, you can do it here.

Have a great week.

CC
www.cardenoc.com

Writing a sex scene

Now I am no means a pro at writing a sex scene, but I wanted to give you some insight into how much trouble those little buggers can be – for me.
In my first m/m novel Loving Jay, the first sex scene we got to, took me about two days to write.  It was extremely embarrassing – for me.  These two characters were chattering away in my head and I knew everything about them.  I knew what they looked like, what they wore, how they walked, what they sounded like when they talked, their fears, their hopes.
But oh-man, writing that first sex scene was like walking in on your parents doing it.
I wanted to whitewash the whole scene and “close the bedroom door,” but as a reader, I knew how much it sometimes annoyed me when writers did that.  Because often in a relationship, what happens in the bedroom is pivotal to the storyline.  I don’t like the sex scene “for sex’s sake,” but there’s no doubt that feelings and emotions happen between the characters that the reader needs to know about.
As I’ve become more experienced at writing gay sex (cheeky grin), it has become easier – easier to relax into and easier to write without setting the fire alarms off – but they are still a huge emotional drainer on me.  Get them right and they sizzle.  Get them wrong and you turn the reader off.
So, here is my mental checklist when writing a sex scene.
Does it contribute to the story?As previously said, a scene that is just for titillation is not always needed.  In some of my storylines, the sex part of the relationship is one of the problems the characters must work through.  So the sex scene needed to be described in detail, while keeping the pace of the storyline.Tip – describe how the character is feeling, and not just “yes, baby, yes.”  We get that he loves to have sex, but a reader needs more.
Does it keep true to the character?Words and actions need to keep true to the character.  Sure, in Real Life, how we are in the bedroom is not reflective of how we act in public, but I am conscious of making the bedrooms scenes an extension of the story.  The character’s actions need to also remain accurate to his upbringing and experiences.Tip – men use the word cock regularly.  I must get over my need to call it a penis.
What is another word for “cock”?Having a thesaurus is often essential!  J  Oh, what to describe those body parts as?  As an author this is painful!  I found myself googling other words for “thrust” as well.  Working, and reworking the scene and changing the words is a torture I go through every single time.  Sometimes I wish I could just write “And they got it on.”  But I guess sacrifices must be made by artists for their work, and having a well-thumbed and well-used reference for “penis” is the sacrifice I make.Tip – hanging out in gay chat rooms is a great source of words!
Does that actually work?Porn helps.  LOL.  I found myself writing a scene the other day where I was actually unsure if the characters could contort themselves in this position in order for it all to work the way I was describing it.  Tip – clear your browsing history regularly. 
Often having a gay friend who you are comfortable with helps too.  You can always ask them and watch as they fall in hysterics on the floor for five minutes before answering your seriously asked question.  The flip side of this, is I often need to shout “TMI!  TMI!” as they provide details.
Keeping it real – safety and fun.We’ve all seen it – the use of condoms and lube in m/m romance.  Actually, it’s pretty good at being the norm these days, which I like.  But is it real?  It is something every author must find their own path on.  Sometimes safety will fling a reader out of the scene.  But other times it can be fun.  And if you’ve ever read one of my books, I love to have fun!
My sheltered upbringing meant my sex education came from Cleomagazines and Mills and Boon.  I try to keep this in mind, and keep it realistic for anyone who feels they need to use my book as a “how-to” guide.Tip – do not try the table scene in The Shearing Gun without a good health plan that includes physiotherapy.
The thin line between emotional and physical.I was discussing the old argument of “women writing gay romance” with a gay friend the other day.   He said (I would like to say complained, but I won’t) to me, in his experience, men have sex first.  It is only after they’ve had sex that they think about relationships and the emotional. 
In my opinion, this is fiction we are reading/writing, and all sex scenes need to cater for the emotional part of the story as well as the physical.  A sex scene at the beginning of a relationship could possibly be more along the lines of wham-bam-fuck-you-man, whereas toward the climax of the story more a celebration of love.  If the scene only describes the mechanics of the act, then it is for titillation only (see above).Tip – put the reader in the bed beside the characters without making it a ménage.  The reader wants to know what is going on inside their heads, as well as all the action.

So after I have all of the above straight, writing the scene should be easy, right?  Ha!
As a reader, have you ever felt you couldn’t stop reading at a certain point of the book and leave your characters cold/wet/hungry/scared?  As an author it is doubly so.  Often I come back and my guys have been at it for hours while I hung the washing on the line and did the vacuuming.  I apologise for leaving them in that awkward position (they often talk to me about blue balls!) and quickly try to finish off the scene.
Or sometimes I want a character to do one thing, and he ends up doing another (usually they smirk in my direction as they go off script.)  
At other times I have to yell “Cut!” and have a word to them about putting more emotion into the act.  (This often requires me telling them, “Okay.  Again.  From the beginning!” as I rewrite and add to the scene.)
They take a lot out of me, these sex scenes.  To me, a good writer doesn’t just plonk a scene into a book.  If it feels “plonked,” then I got it wrong.  It needs to be right.
Last month I remember sitting down in front of a manuscript and growling, “Right.  I need to get this scene finished today.  I’ve been at it for two days!”  My mother phoned and asked me if I was busy and what was I up to?  I couldn’t really say, “Well, Paul and Andrew are going for it like bunnies.  Man!  Andrew is kinky!  I've had to do a lot of research on these things! Paul is totally unprepared for it, but as willing as all fuck to go along with it, but really?  How many times can two guys do it in the 2 hours they have?  Do you think that starting in the shower is a good thing?  No, I think Andrew will jump Paul the minute he walks through that hotel door.”
Perhaps you have a different type of relationship with your mother.  But me? Telling my mother I’ve spent two days writing about two men having sex…?  Just no.

How to contact Renae:
Email:  renaekaye@iinet.net.au
Website:  www.renaekaye.weebly.com
FB:  www.facebook.com/renae.kaye.9
Twitter:  @renaekkaye

Ask Andrew - The Lady Readers

Dear Andrew

Why do you think women like gay novels so much?  I am in a Facebook group and there is a woman that posts photos of men who love each other. I'm not offended, of course, but I wonder....  As a writer, do you find this a little disconcerting? 

Thank you
Agnese

Dear Agnese

I am asked this type of questions a lot.  I go to various conventions, even gay romance conventions, and I am one of the few men there, either as an author or a reader.  I have talked to many readers and I have to say that I have the answer to your question.  There isn't one answer.  Readers are fans of gay romance for a wide variety of reasons.  Some ladies read gay romance for the heat and the passion of two men together.  Some read because they see the relationship between men as a sort of forbidden fruit.  There is the 'ones good, two's better' answer I get quite often as well, sort of along the line of why straight men like two women together. The answer I like most is that many women feel that love is love, period.  That answer warms my heart no end. 

As for the second part of your question.  I don't find this fascination with men loving each other disconcerting at all.  I thank all the wonderful women and the powers that be for each and every one of my lady readers.  Without them I wouldn't be able to do what I love to do so much.   And I see the effects of this openness and acceptance in many facets of life from the death of DOMA to the rising acceptance of marriage equality.  The attitudes of society are changing and those changes are driven by women.  I further believe that some of the main drivers of that change are romance readers.  They are open minded, vocal, and I love them all.  My lady gay romance readers are amazing and they have helped change the world, or at least my world for the better. 

Hugs and love
Andrew

Ask Andrew is your chance to ask questions of a gay romance author.  The questions can be about the writing process in general, writing sex scenes, gay men, sex, characters in romance, characters having sex... okay you probably get the picture.    I promise to answer your questions as frankly and with as much humor as I possibly can.

So if you have a question, please send it to andrewgreybooks@comcast.net.  This is different from my usual email so your questions don't get lost.  I will answer one question a week.

Please remember this is meant to be all in fun.  (I was going to say good, clean fun, but who wants that.)    So send me your questions and let's see what mischief we can get into.

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