Catherine Fitzsimmons's Blog: Jinxed, page 3

New art: Terrarium

I’ve been sitting on this one for a while thinking that I might do more with it, but just decided to call it done.

Clip Studio Paint, finished 29 March 2024.

Photos from Tobermory

Taken July 11-14 near Tobermory, Ontario and Flowerpot Island.

New art: Dr. Jekyll & Mr. Hyde

A month later, I finished cartoonifying my other cat.

Clip Studio Paint, completed 29 June 2024. The model:

How do I read thee? Let me count the ways…

If you were to ask me how many books are on my to-be-read list, I couldn’t give you a simple answer. The truth is, I have several.

Physical books: 16 (not including ones bought/owned by family members)Complete books on Kindle: 96Complete books on Google Play: 63Book samples on Kindle: 90Books highlighted on my library’s e-reading app: 31Books on my Goodreads TBR: 74

So how does one make progress on that many different fronts? Well, I’m still working on that.

Physical books are easy to start. They’re sitting there, stories full of potential awaiting only the turn of a page, cover art enticing me whenever I walk past. That’s why I don’t have so many of those unread; I more or less keep up with them.

All those digital books, however, are easier to overlook. But if I say I’ll get to B books once I finish with A books, then I’ll never end up reading the B books. So, around the beginning of last year, I finally started tackling the complete books on Kindle, and followed up a little later by dipping my toes into the ones on Google Play.

A lot of the Kindle books came from free Bookbub promotions, before I started getting selective about which ones I acquired that way. I have no attachment to those authors or titles; as a result, I’ve already DNFed a good few of those.* (Play Books I use when I am given a straight ebook file download.)

* To be fair, I’m pretty quick about DNFing any book these days, regardless of author or book.

I’ve only recently started using my library’s (current) ebook app—largely because very few of the books on any of the other lists are available digitally through my library—hence the lower number there. It’s also mostly graphic novels, as the app has recommended several to me since I started using the app by reading a manga series that caught my eye.

There is some minor overlap between some of these: a handful of my TBRs on Goodreads I already have in Kindle or Play Books. Largely, though, these lists are entirely separate of each other. So, I’m trying to divide my time between physical books, Kindle books, and Play books (aside from the occasional library indulgence).

But that still leaves some lists stagnating. My Goodreads TBRs have languished largely ignored since I started leaning into downloading samples of books of interest to Kindle, and certainly is no accurate indicator of the actual list of books I want to read. Since I’ve started consolidating my digital books into Kindle or Play Books, I should go through my Goodreads list and add those as well.

Last week, I also had that I’m never going to read these at this rate realization looking at my collection of book samples on Kindle. This is my default method of marking a book ‘I want to check this out later’. There are a lot of books from authors I’ve met at events, as well as whatever titles might catch my eye at bookstores or are recommended to me. Samples are free, so I figure I’ll read that much and if it catches me, I’ll pick up the full book.

Only I haven’t been doing that. Again, it’s easy to justify—why read just a part of a book when I can dive in to one of these dozens of complete books I already have? But there’s a reason I added all those samples. I am genuinely interested in giving those books a try.

So I started doing that. And hey, it’s much more efficient that way: I DNFed two samples in a single evening and am currently waist-deep in another book I sampled on Saturday and am now 70% through. Aside from the fact that it feels good to make progress in a previously untouched list, this book in particular has turned out to be just as entertaining as the title made it seem when I added it several years ago.

There are still some lists that are getting ignored—I don’t have a written list of big-name SFF books I’m curious to try, classics, or the next books in various series I’m following—but I am gradually working through my TBR; all of them.

Just don’t ask me how many video games I have in my backlog.

Art flood

When I say that I’ve neglected to update this blog, even I’m surprised at the extent to which that refers. Case in point: here’s some art over the last three years that has never made it onto this site (or, in some cases, anywhere else).

Oil pastel, 2.5″ x 3.5″, 2024 April 23 Oil pastel, 2.5″ x 3.5″, 2024 April 22 Sumi-e, 8.5″ x 11″, 2023 September 20 Brush pen, 8.5″ x 11″, 2022 October 7 Polymer clay, ~2.5″x2″x2″, 2022 May 20 Acrylic, 16″x20″, 2022 May 20 Marker, 8.5″x11″, 2022 May 3 Sumi-e, 8.5″x11″, 2022 March 8 Watercolour, 9″x12″, 2021 November 13 Felt art, 1″x6″, 2021 August 2 Watercolour, 8.5″x11″, 2021 July 31

And, of course, I’ve completely failed to share any of the book covers I’ve drawn/painted/etc. for Brain Lag. Although I’ve designed/created 90% of Brain Lag’s book covers, I’m sharing here only the covers I’ve actually drawn from scratch. (The photomanipulations, 3D renders, and edited stock image covers are, of course, visible on the website. I am proud of some of those, it’s just not the focus of this post.)

Charcoal Charcoal Charcoal Photoshop Photoshop Sumi-e Photoshop Photoshop Photoshop

I also did interior illustrations for three of these books, given the light novel style of Green Light to Paradise and Welcome to the Other London (and its sequel, for which I did not draw the cover) and that A Jewel on Sapphire is a chapter book, which are usually (always?) illustrated. However, I’m only sharing one illustration from each of those; you’ll have to buy the books to see the rest.

A Jewel on Sapphire, chapter 6 Green Light to Paradise, 5 days until Paradise Other London volume 1, chapter 1 Other London volume 2, chapter 10

So, now that I’m caught up on sharing art (I think), it should be easy to keep up with it from now on, right?

…right?

One year later

I’ve neglected to update this blog. Par for the course, but when it comes to something like cancer treatment, regular readers may desire—and certainly deserve—more information.

It’s now been over a year since I was diagnosed with fibromyxosarcoma, and a year nearly to the day since my second surgery on it. I completed radiation treatment last August.

It’s a little surreal. Every step of the process, and how I felt about it, is etched into my long-term memory.

That longest week of my life after getting the news and before hearing back from an oncologist. The tremor in my hands, voice, and probably everything else when I walked out of what I anticipated as a simple post-surgery follow-up appointment only to learn that I needed radiation. The way my vision wobbled slightly before I awoke in the recovery ward following the first surgery. Getting a tube pulled out of my neck. Vivid memories, now so long ago they almost don’t seem real.

Finishing cancer treatment isn’t like on TV. There’s no party with doctors happily proclaiming, “You’re cancer free!” So far, it’s been more, “Well, it looks good so far. Come back again in three months.” (I did get to ring a gong when I completed radiation, but the side effects were at their worst at that time, so it wasn’t too much of a celebration.)

The truth is, while the immediate danger is past, cancer will always be hanging over me for the rest of my life. Radiation therapy can and usually does cause long-term side effects. Head and neck radiation can cause osteonecrosis—bone death—in the jaw, so if I ever need a tooth pulled, it must be done by a dental oncologist. And now, every time I see a doctor for any issue beyond a run-of-the-mill infection, I’m going to get additional tests and a more thorough workup to rule out any more serious issues, because now I have a history.

Of course, in my case, the cancer was pretty much always there, so it’s only that I’m aware of it now, and the effects of the treatment itself are more the concern. But it is a defining moment in my life; before diagnosis and after.

All that said, this is only a background concern. The side effects of radiation have long since faded, and I don’t anticipate any return of the cancer, certainly not anytime soon even if it survived the radiation. I’m living my life and not worrying about it—perhaps a little too in the moment, as perfectionism and ADHD tendencies continue to hinder getting some things done (like oh, say, writing blog posts).

So what’s next? Next, I need to start writing again.

New art: Smol cat strut

Clip Studio Paint, finished 22 May 2024.

The model:

New art: Year of the Dragon

New art: Meeting

Still enjoying making art on my iPad. For this drawing, I wanted to try some of the real media brushes in Clip Studio Paint—I went with chalk for most of this piece—and I thought a children’s book illustration style would suit the tools well.

I’ll draw something other than a dragon soon. Probably.

New art: Upon the Porcelain Throne

I drew the album art for musician Jett Swole‘s latest release, Upon the Porcelain Throne.

I… really enjoyed doing the messy style.