Catherine Fitzsimmons's Blog: Jinxed, page 21

Stay tuned for the exciting conclusion

I’ve written a lot of stories over the years. Some have made it pretty far, in fact. But Enduring Chaos, the book I am currently writing, is only the fifth time I have reached the climax of a novel, and each time it’s been different.

The first novel I wrote to its end was actually the previous draft of this very story. It was pretty straightforward; I knew what needed to happen and wrote it. End of story. Um, literally.

The second story climax I reached was Aurius. While it was only the second time I’d reached the ultimate conflict in a novel-length work, it was still completely different from anything I’d written before, largely because I really had no idea what was going to happen. I knew where it needed to end, but as to how it was going to get there, I was purely winging it. And yet, the mere act of writing it made it pour out onto the page in a way that actually had me on the edge of my seat. It was dramatic, it was tense, and a surprise major plot twist was revealed that I had no idea of before that point. It became an incredibly important event not just for the story, but for the star personally, and I learned some important lessons in the act of writing it.

The third novel climax I wrote was Halcyon. This story was different again because the big, long, epic, drawn-out action sequence actually happened before the end. The finale was still quite important to the story, but having immediately followed such a long action scene, it ended up brief. It was, I’d like to think, still tense and dramatic, but while I could have drawn it out a little, it seemed unnecessary, if not redundant.

The fourth novel – arguably – climax I reached was during NaNoWriMo 2009 and is not much to speak of. In fact, I’d prefer not to speak of that story at all.

Now, here I am at the end of Enduring Chaos and it’s a different beast once more. This climax, and the book in general, have ended up very different from its previous incarnation. The main challenge to this finale that is new to me is juggling several different points of view. Halcyon had six different POVs throughout the story, but the perspective switched only at the start of a new chapter, so the climax all happened from a single character’s point of view, and the main group of characters who go through that event are all together.

In Chaos, not only does the POV switch from scene to scene, the characters are all separated and doing different things in the climax, so I wrote a lot of things all happening at the same time. Each character’s scene had to be dramatic, tense, and relevant while balancing character reactions and surprises being revealed. While I had the whole thing fairly plotted out beforehand, things changed along the way as I wrote and found something didn’t work or the pacing was off.

To my chagrin, the writing ended up dragging a bit, and not just because of its length – though it was a hefty chunk of writing at over 13,000 words – though perhaps that had more to do with my emotional state last week. However, I did complete it, and while the act of writing it was sluggish at times, I think that what came out worked.

The conclusion of the story also posed an interesting challenge, as it ended up with the same level of improvisation as the climax did upon further reflection of how these events affected the final chapter. Interestingly, it has also created an entirely new issue for book 2 that was never planned before, here a scant two weeks before I begin writing it for NaNoWriMo.

I suppose any good novel will throw me for a loop at some point or another, and it certainly isn’t a bad thing that it does. Here now with only the epilogue left to write of Enduring Chaos, it has been an adventure once again. Initial concerns of the book ending up a little on the concise side have been completely dashed, as the last few weeks have seen me add over 40% more material to what I had thought was 3/4 of the story already, leaving this draft tipping the scales at just over 100,000 words. Which just goes to show, one can never make assumptions about the length of a book until one has written it to its end.

In recognition of the progress of this book – and perhaps as motivation to keep me focused on actually finishing it – I have updated the novels section here to include information and quick access to blog posts about Enduring Chaos. Consider this an open invitation to bug me about status updates or any other information you might like on the novel.

Now, of course, once I write the brief epilogue, begins an entirely new adventure once more: beta reads and final editing.

Where have all the words gone?

For years, I more or less focused on my art. I wrote as well, it was something I enjoyed and wanted and indeed made time to do, but I defined myself first as an artist. My true goal was to become a good artist and I was more emotionally invested in it. Sometime in the past few years, my focus shifted primarily to writing, until the art became more or less a hobby in the shadow of my true passion of storycrafting.

Sharing writing is a far more interesting issue, however. While it takes only seconds for a viewer to look at a piece of art, asking one to read a novel is an investment of hours, even weeks of time. Also, it poses different challenges for the creator. It’s easy for an artist to put out many works and perhaps even get paid by admirers for them, because they enjoy spending a few seconds frequently looking at that creation outside of a computer screen, on their wall. For a novelist, however, a huge amount of time and effort goes into a single project, and sharing the entirety of that project for free, while a great way to get word out about it, vastly reduces the income that author is looking to get from selling it.

I posted all my writing online for years. I never really entertained the notion that I would one day be published and I much preferred the direct feedback I got from sharing my work online. It was only when I wrote my novel Aurius during NaNoWriMo 2007 that I first wrote something I did not share with the public, largely for logistics purposes than any predetermined intent for it. With the thought that I could publish that novel because it had never been published elsewhere, however, my attitude changed fairly rapidly, and I have not posted any complete novels online since.

A few complete and attempted novels later, I am still dealing with this transition. I would like to share something about my writing with those interested in reading it, though I’m not going to share the writing itself. I still have not quite learned how to write about writing, which is mostly what one who does not share one’s writing for free can do with a blog like this.

Suffice to say, with a one-year-old still consuming much of my time and my creative pursuits dwindling almost entirely to writing and nothing else, I continue to be a poor blogger.

The fact that I am focusing exclusively on writing, however, does mean that I have made some notable progress with it. After the release of my second novel Halcyon earlier this year, focus has shifted to my next book Enduring Chaos. This is an interesting project on its own as it is one of my oldest, originally started in 1999 and now in its third complete draft, arguably fourth, each being completely rewritten from scratch. It has evolved a lot over the years, now having been expanded into the first book of a trilogy in a shared world my husband and I created.

This current draft began as my NaNoWriMo novel for 2010. After reaching 50,000 words, the amount of editing it needed outweighed the push to continue writing, and I soon began working on v3-edit, a new .doc file again and the current incarnation of the story. Edits on this draft – the significance of which I’m no longer certain and think is largely rewritten from v3 – along with continuing the story kept me busy while I could still sit comfortably during the later part of my pregnancy.

After I gave birth, Chaos went on the back burner as my daughter consumed almost 100% of my attention for a couple months, after which I decided to turn my focus to editing Halcyon for publication this summer. At last, a few months ago, I finally returned to the book, of course to find that it needed more editing again before I could finish the story, despite being at least 3/4 along by the time the wee one came along.

Two weeks ago, I completed my re-edits – or is that pre-edits? – and was able to pick up where I left off. Now, almost two years after starting this current draft, I am in the midst of writing the climax of the story. I should have it finished before I travel to visit my family in a week and a half.

My intention, since there is still at least a little more editing I would like to do, was to reread it before handing it off to my husband for a first beta read before sending it out to other friends and interested readers. However, it’s rapidly coming time for me to shift gears again, as after taking a hiatus last year due to the baby, I am returning to NaNoWriMo this year.

Given that I don’t want there to be a gap between the release of the three books of this trilogy and thus should focus all my serious effort on this world until the third book is complete, I had originally planned to write a new, unrelated scifi novel for NaNoWriMo just to give myself a little break. However, development for the second book has progressed rapidly in the past few months and I decided instead to write that in November. It’s an exciting prospect on its own, as I’ve never made it to a book 2 before – nor, aside from one other story, was I ever really interested in writing more than a one-shot novel. The way the story has unfolded has really grabbed me, though, and I’m looking forward to the novel I’m going to write.

Once I get the outline completed, that is.

I can’t promise that I will be consistent with writing more here when I still have less of my actual work to share, but I would like to start updating this blog more regularly. Reaching the climax of a novel for only the fifth time in my life alone is pretty interesting, as I’m sure will be writing the ending. And, of course, there are always excerpts to share.

Halcyon fan art

Thank you to everyone who stopped by my tables at Gen Con and Fan Expo! Halcyon had a great reception and I’m looking forward to my next convention in November. And for those who can’t wait that long, Halcyon is now on sale online!

I’ve recently received some fantastic fan art of characters from Halcyon. This drawing of Zander comes from Janna Fong:

The following drawing of Elya comes courtesy of Sarah Petrulis:

And at Fan Expo I received a sketch of Zander from Nicole Chartrand, creator of the webcomic Fey Winds:

Thanks to everyone who has taken the time to draw these characters!

Gen Con!

I’ll be with my publisher Brain Lag at Gen Con in Indianapolis, IN this weekend. We’ll be in Author’s Avenue in the exhibit hall with my first book Aurius and the very first appearance of my second book Halcyon! This is an exclusive world premiere, so come to Gen Con to get your copy before anyone else! Ever wondered what would happen if a computer virus infected cybernetic implants? Now you can find out…

Hope to see you there!

Sketches – Halcyon

I actually picked up my sketchbook and pencil for the first time in quite a while recently and drew up some headshots of the characters from Halcyon:

The characters in the first image are: Zander, Elya, Galina, Amélie, Chen and Dwayne. In the second image: Shad, Deadeye, Gerod, Solace, Sinclair and Squirrel.

It feels good to draw again.

Announcing Halcyon

Some edits have been made to the novels section in preparation for the upcoming release of my second book, Halcyon.

This scifi novel is the story of a computer virus that infects cybernetic implants and the efforts to create an antivirus for it. For more information, please visit the book’s page.

Halcyon will premiere at Gen Con in Indianapolis, IN August 16-19 at the table for Brain Lag in Author’s Avenue in the Dealer’s Hall, after which paperbacks and ebooks will be available for purchase online. I will be at the table all four days of the convention; hope to see you there!

Practice sketch – November 19

Gathering dust

Been rather quiet around here of late.  The short story is that real life has gotten in the way of updates – and content to update with.  New house and new baby eat up a lot of free time, and up until yesterday, I’d only done one new drawing in perhaps the last six months.  As it is, including yesterday’s efforts that number’s only two, though I’m hoping yesterday’s work will help springboard more sketching.

Reading some excellent art reference books lately have inspired me to really try to improve my art, and this dearth of drawing this year have made me decide to forego polish for substance, so I did a quick, loose practice sketch yesterday:

The character is Hawkeye from Seiken Densetsu 3, a game that followed Secret of Mana for the Super Nintendo in Japan that was never released here.

As this type of drawing can be done in the baby’s very brief daytime naps, and given what I consider the success of this sketch, I’m hoping to start doing more of these.  It’s quite refreshing not needing to make every stroke perfect.

As for other productivity over the past several months, I am at work editing my novel Halcyon for publication hopefully next spring.  Major edits are complete and I’ve started work on the cover art while waiting for feedback from a few preliminary readers.  Don’t really have much to show for it at the moment, but the current plan is to attend a few conventions next year.

In the meantime, I have a four-month-old to take care of.

Daring to Speak Out

I didn’t used to read a lot.  Far from it to say I didn’t enjoy reading or was interested in it, it’s just that scifi and fantasy are chock full of huge, epic series, often not well marked, and knowing where to start can be a daunting task for someone just trying to get into those genres.  Add in a decidedly limited budget, few friends who shared such interest who could offer suggestions, and libraries with very poor selections of fantasy/scifi, and it took a long time for me to delve into mainstream genre novels.  For a while, I mostly read amateur fiction online, some of which I still count as some of the best works I’ve ever read, or classic literature that one can download for free.

Finally, due in large part to a promotion by fantasy/scifi publisher Tor which allowed me to download many free ebooks, I began to get into the genre.  I still wouldn’t consider myself well-read – I’ve read an average of about 21 books per year since I first got into said promotion – but now I recognize many or most of the names on bookstore shelves, and I feel like my reading experience is more or less representative of the genre, rather than a few random selections encountered by chance.

After reading this many books, I have become a somewhat more discerning reader.  I still struggle with abandoning a book which I have already invested time in, but I will give up on a book I am thoroughly not enjoying.  I have read enough very good fantasy/scifi that I am a little pickier about things I didn’t enjoy in a book than I used to be.

I first started posting reviews of books I read online just to share and spread the word about books I enjoyed, though I continued with my reviews because it seemed a convenient way to keep track of what books I’d read for my own benefit.  This has resulted, of course, in some less than favourable reviews.  I don’t really like to post unkind reviews, and I try not to fault the author and be specific about what it was I didn’t like – as, being an author myself, I know how an unsavoury review can hurt – but I am simply being honest in what I thought about the book.

This is an even more bitter pill to swallow with independent authors.  I am honest to a fault; I cannot say I enjoyed something if I didn’t.  And I don’t want to skip reviewing a book just because I don’t want to give it a bad review.  Yet, because I support independent authors – and, again, am one myself – a part of me feels uncomfortable with publicly posting an unfavourable review for an independent novel.

Another dilemma comes from the fact that my tastes seem to differ from many others.  I’ve looked up a number of books I’ve read on Amazon.com to find nothing but glowing reviews when I personally didn’t enjoy the book very much. (This isn’t exclusive to books, and it’s not a recent phenomenon; I’ve had to develop a thicker skin for the things I enjoy, and don’t, or otherwise not mention it at all.)

Part of me thinks that if I’m going to post these reviews publicly to my journal, that I should share them elsewhere, such as on Amazon.com.  Perhaps other people feel the same way that I do, different from the norm, and the added exposure might help garner more interest in my own works.  And besides, I never claimed to be an expert.  I have always stated that this is just my opinion of the books I read, and I fully allow others to disagree with me.

Another part of me, however, is worried about what negative comments might come of me posting, honestly, a number of unfavourable reviews, even to books that have received nothing but five-star ratings otherwise.  Will I come off as mean, elitist, or know-it-all?  Or, worse, will this open me up to harsh reviews of my own work, those reading my honest reviews feeling that I can withstand or even deserve such critical words on my writing?  I want honest opinions of my own work, true, but I have in the past received some nasty retribution for leaving critical comments on others’ work, even though I always try to put a positive spin on it, knowing what I appreciate in critique.

I hesitated to post my latest book review publicly on my personal journal, simply because it was less favourable, and particularly to an independent author.  Is this just the price of making my opinions known and must I accept possible repercussions or hurt feelings as a result of sharing them?  Or should I just quietly keep my thoughts to myself and only publicly laud those books I thoroughly enjoyed?

I am not an outgoing person, I don’t like to make people uncomfortable, and I really don’t have a thick skin.  Sharing unfavourable reviews may involve a bit of a personality shift.

It’s not an easy decision to make.

New art: Carousel

Originally drawn a couple years ago, inspired by this drawing, Heritage House “Yesterday” musical carousel horse, and classic My Little Pony art, dedicated to K. Healey of Letraset for his excellent customer service.