Benjamin Sobieck's Blog, page 43

Maynard Soloman Beats Miss Marple

Sorry, that's not the name of the next Maynard installment. Here's a snapshot of the rankings of mystery anthologies on Amazon. 4 Funny Detective Stories - Starring Maynard Soloman has pulled ahead of a Miss Marple anthology.

Keen!

Maynard Soloman Burns Up the Amazon UK Charts

It just gets better and better. Thank you, UK readers! Click here to check out 4 Funny Detective Stories - Starring Maynard Soloman on Amazon UK.

How to Spend a Royalty Check: Give It to Charity

There are three reasons I decided to donate my royalty payment to the National Kidney Foundation.

1) It's a great charity, rated four stars (the highest possible) by Charity Navigator. No funny business going on with this organization. They do good work for kidney transplant and dialysis patients. I should know.

2) I want something positive to come out of the Trestle Press situation. Even more than that, I needed some closure. Much has been and will be written about what happened. At least my story can have a happy ending.

3) Another term for "royalty payment" is "beer money." It'd be just that if Ol' Sawbones would give me the green light. Giving it to a charity is a better use of the money anyway. It's not like I'll miss it.

Anyone looking to do some charitable giving this tax season, be sure to run the outfit by Charity Navigator. It's a great resource, and shows exactly how money is spent.

4 Funny Detective Stories Charts on Amazon in Less Than 24 Hours

It's been out for less than 24 hours, but 4 Funny Detective Stories - Starring Maynard Soloman is already #31 #24 in the political humor category. Thanks for sticking with the series, readers!

Click here to get a copy of 4 Funny Detective Stories - Starring Maynard Soloman for just $2.99. That's a bargain for four short stories priced at 99 cents a piece. You save a buck!

4 Funny Detective Stories - Starring Maynard Soloman

4 Funny Detective Stories - Starring Maynard Soloman is now available at Amazon and Smashwords for $2.99. That's a bargain considering the four individual short stories went/will go for 99 cents a pop.

Here's the description:

"I recommend to everyone who is looking for a quick read. It's perfect for that pick me up laugh, that bathroom read, that afternoon escape." - Molly Edwards, Reviews by Molly

 

"Oh my goodness! I'm not sure when I've laughed so hard. It was like having a conversation with the man from the 'Grumpy Old Men' movie! So much fun!" - Gina Hott, Hott Books

 

"It never ceases to amaze me how this young man has created such a perfect crotchety old character. This is such a fun series and Maynard has become one of my favorite characters." - Michelle Peden Vasquez, Life in Review

 

"With a chip on his shoulder and more than his share of attitude, the protagonist presents himself as a force to be reckoned with and immediately captured my interest." - Chantal Boudreau, author/illustrator

 

"With a satirical take on everything from America's war on drugs to immigration law to social security, Maynard Soloman is a mobile home-dwelling crime-fighting dynamo. He may not be the brightest bulb in the box, but he sure is amusing." - Laura Roberts, ePublisher Daily

* Best short story of 2011 nominee by Preditors & Editors Reader Poll.

Fans of funny detective stories, meet Maynard Soloman, gal-damn detective. Some would say he's crusty, profane and clueless. But if you ask him, he solves the world's problems one case at a time. Once you experience his 1930s-style of doing business in a 21st century world, you just might agree.

 

Included are four short stories: "Maynard Soloman Solves the War on Drugs," "Maynard Soloman Fixes Social Security and Eats a Pony," "Maynard Soloman and the Job-Nabbin' Illegal Immigrants" and "Maynard Soloman Proves Santa Claus is Real."

Click here to get 4 Funny Detective Stories - Starring Maynard Soloman for $2.99 from Amazon or Smashwords.

A Blogging Award, A Kidney Transplant and Spiritual Possession for My Birthday

Just in time for my birthday, author and criminologist Jennifer Chase nominates me for The Versatile Blogger Award. Thank you, Jennifer! This is quite the birthday surprise.

The Versatile Blogger Award is one of those viral tbadges that skates from blog to blog. It's still cool to get one, though. It means someone thinks enough of your blog to shoot you the award.

Here are the rules:

1) If you get the award, you have to post a link back to the person who gave it to you.

2) Then you have to nominate 15 other bloggers for the award.

3) Anyone with an award has to say seven interesting things about himself/herself.

Seven "Interesting(?)" Things About Me

1) In 2010, a living donor gave me a kidney. It's the only reason I'm up and writing today. The donor is still happy and healthy. I was lucky. Roughly 113,000 are hoping they will be, too, but 18 die every day. Please be an organ donor. Here's information about becoming one.

2) Two-thirds of my caloric intake on any given day comes from peanut butter. Breakfast and lunch don't happen without a jar of the good stuff. Purists like me prefer chunky.

3) I really enjoy cooking. To date, my talent doesn't match my enthusiasm. My most recent successful culinary adventure was "duck nuggets," made with wild duck hunted in North Dakota.

4) I work from a home office, but I still have a secretary. She handles phone calls, makes lunch and makes it easier to get things done. By that I mean, "jumps on my lap when I'm trying to dial a phone number," "steals my lunch" and "bugs me to go outside and chase squirrels."

5) I'm a big fan of horror movies. I used to rent old video tapes with my friends from this dump down the road. The B-horror movies were so bad. And at the same time, so good.

6) I've been possessed by otherworldly spirits. Which is to say, I recently tore down and rebuilt a flight of stairs in our house. This is not something I'd normally do. The only possibility is spiritual possession. Or a concern someone would fall through the stairs.

7) I was in a garage band in high school and college. It was called Soylent Laxatives. Listen to our songs here on MySpace. (Wow, that felt weird to type. MySpace? Really?)

15 Author/Bloggers Worth Checking Out

Paul D. Brazill - The godfather of indie crime fiction

Laura Roberts - Best sense of humor on this side of literotica.

Vincent Zandri - One of my favorite crime authors

Jimmy Callaway - Because sometimes pop culture needs a cigarette in the eye

B.R. Stateham - Known this crime writer forever (or at least since I started trying this crazy crime fiction thing in 2009)

Molly Edwards - Book reviewer and all-around great person

Michelle Peden Vasquez - Another great reviewer and terrific person

April Schiff Pohen - Also a fantastic reviewer and outstanding individual. (Hey, I gotta score points with the reviewers where I can, right?)

K.A. Laity - Kate is one of those rare authors who actually comes out from the cave and interacts with people. Who knew?

John Hansen - He's under 20, but has better game than people thrice his age.

Col Bury - Proof UK talent needs more attention from readers on this side of the pond.

David Barber - The editor of The Flash Fiction Offensive, one of the finest crime flash fiction sites on the 'Net.

Chris Allinotte - I stick to crime fiction blogs, but I make an exception for this Canadian horror author.

Michel R Vaillancourt - Author of steampunk and articulate blogger about the writing world.

Fiona Johnson (aka McDroll) - A crime author with stories so bad-ass she needed another name.

How to Spot a Fake Amazon E-Book Review

John Hansen is one of those up-and-comers I'm sure I'll brag about knowing before he got big. Case in point: This articulate post about how to spot a fake Amazon e-book review.

"Fake" in this case means the review has been planted by the author or arranged by the author. I've done those things before, but it's been overt. I'm not hiding anything. Fake reviews brush this disclosure aside, opting for cheeseball handles like "Al Chambers" or "Monique Anderson."

Click here to read John's post about spotting fake Amazon e-book reviews.

Need an example? Click here for one of the worst offenders. See if you can spot the fake ones. (Hint: If you can't, you're blind.)

The Finger in the Freezer & A Free E-Book

The Finger in the Freezer is the name of the flash fiction piece I'm submitting for Canadian horror writer Chris Allinotte's 9 Days of Madness anthology. The stories are sure to be full of blood and guts, spiced with some thought-provoking social commentary. I hope mine can be one of them.

Authors, if you'd like to do the same, click here for details.

Readers, this will be a free e-book. Until it's published, read the stories one at time over nine days over at The Leaky Pencil.

The first anthology, 8 Days of Madness, is also a free e-book available to read right now by clicking here.

Would You Read a Novel Written in 3 Days?

In most cases, I would say, "No" or "Only if I knew the author was already talented, just going through a coke relapse."

I don't know if Laura Roberts is taking sleigh rides between paragraph breaks, but I do know one thing. She wrote Rebels of the 512 in three days as part of a contest. Even a crackhead slamming keys for three incoherent days would have to admit that was an ambitious goal.

Here's the rundown.

REBELS OF THE 512 is the best novel about pirates, ninjas and evil politicians in Austin, Texas you'll ever read.

Is this because it's likely the ONLY novel about pirates, ninjas and evil politicians in Austin, Texas you'll ever read? I can't answer these types of hypothetical questions, as I only deal in absolutes. Also, I'm just the description of the book. You'll have to decide for yourself, grasshopper.

 

REBELS OF THE 512 is, however, novelist Laura Roberts' 2011 entry in Canada's 3-Day Novel Contest. If you enjoy pirates, ninjas, political satire and true love, then what are you waiting for? Grab a copy and see what happens when an author avoids sleep and indulges in toxic amounts of caffeine over a 72-hour period.

Show a little love for Laura's coffee maker and pick up a copy here on Amazon.

Free E-Books Friday = Follow @originaloflaura

Hey, you. You like free e-books, right? What's that? No, I don't know if there's a White Castle in this town. Do you want the free e-books or not?

It's as easy as clicking here to follow @originaloflaura, aka Laura Roberts. She's going to draw winners from all her followers. Don't worry, you'll still have time for your usual Friday Crave Case.