Selene Castrovilla's Blog, page 5

Passion Makes All Things Possible

Today I gave a presentation at a showcase for library programs. Actually, they called it a “performance.”

I guess I am a performer. I guess we all are, when we go out each day and try to do our best. But I see what I do as presenting history and stories. I feel like performing is less real than presenting – and not as enduring.

(Admittedly, this could be a writerly word texture thing.)

I entered stage left, having been warned about the heated lights and expecting to sweat profusely. Perhaps foreknowledge helps, because I did not sweat even one drop. (A menopause miracle.)

I did what I love to do. I talked about George Washington and how incredible he was – providing details. I shared excerpts from my revolutionary work, and then spoke about my YA writing. I talked about the pursuit and realization of a dream, and my continual pursuit of answers. Why do people hurt each other? Is a timeless biggie.

People loved me. Many approached me afterward. One said, “Wow, you were amazing.”

I said, ” I love to talk.”

She said, “You do it well! That’s a natural talent.”

I assure you, public speaking does not come easily for me. When I was in high school my knees shook so violently when I approached a podium that I feared everyone would notice. Maybe they did. I was too busy trying to get the words out without fainting that I couldn’t gauge audience reaction.

But in high school, I had to give reports on things I had no interest in. Without an enticing subject, I was left to focus on me.

“It’s because I’m passionate,” I told her. “It’s because I love my subject so much that nothing else can get it the way.”

Passion. It’s not just for breakfast anymore.

 

 

Authentic Art: Can Authors Survive Without Tricks and Ponies?

Last night, my sixteen year old son said he wanted to show me something.

“Okay,” I said – hoping that it wasn’t a gruesome scene from The Walking Dead. More dystopia I do not need.

He held his cell phone in front of me, with the picture reversed so that I was on the screen. I was surprised to see I didn’t look bad. “Is this what you wanted to show me? How to take a selfie?”

“No. Open your mouth. Wide.”

Stranger and stranger. But I did it. Mothers humor their children.

He must’ve triggered some app, because the next thing I knew, a rainbow was gushing from my mouth. It was silly, and kind of gross. “Done?” I asked.

He said, “Mom, this what you have to do if you want to sell books.”

“Spew rainbows?”

“Yeah. You have to be funny on Twitter.”

“I’m funny on Twitter.”

“Not your kind of funny. Our kind of funny. You have to tweet stuff like this, and do it on YouTube, too.”

“I’ve done many things for marketing,” I told him. “But I draw the line at puking rainbows.”

What would Thoreau say about Twitter? I think his head would explode.

I don’t like this turn in society: where writers are pushed into ridiculous banalities to draw attention to our work.

I’m entertaining because I’m passionate about my subject, and I also happened to be authentically personable. Authenticity is the key. I’ve done many free high school visits in at-risk schools, where the students were quite skeptical of me. But by the time I finished, they all applauded, and wanted to read my books. Some of them were inspired to write their own. I remember one young lady in particular, who approached me after a presentation. She said, “I like you. You not fake.”

No, I’m not.

One of my lowest moments was at a PTA showcase on Long Island, where performers had tables, and each of us was given about twenty minutes to present. I guess I should’ve questioned the word “performer,” but I naively believed that everyone would be “performing” something educational. Two of my books feature true stories about Long Island during the Revolutionary War. Pretty exciting stuff – especially for kids on Long Island. But could history compete with the snake handlers, jugglers, magicians and clowns who surrounded me? It seemed not, for most parents were passing me by on their bee-line to the boa constrictor guy, and the man dressed as Merlin.

What was happening here?

I couldn’t quite grasp the reasoning for booking an “entertainer” at a school. Why couldn’t parents just take their kids to see the Ringling Brothers? Or hire a magician for a party? Wasn’t school a place for enrichment and learning?

It got worse.

Much worse.

My twenty minutes were scheduled after some dog and pony show. Literally. The parents loved that performance. They gave it a standing ovation. I wondered what was going in America. I thought of moving to Europe.

It was my turn. I spoke, but no one listened. When they saw than I was sans animals or party tricks, many stood up in the bleachers and made their way out. The ones that stayed were in loud conversations. I was literally speaking to myself, yet unable to hear myself due to the din.

My friend and mentor, author Josephine Nobisso happened to walk in. When she saw what was happening, she started to yell. “Excuse me! Do you know how rude you’re being? This woman is an award-winning author, who has an amazing program your children will actually learn something from!”

Sweet, but now I had hostile eyes on me. I did the rest of my time, knowing that these people were listening only because they were chided, and they would be booking the dog and pony guy. Or the snake guy. Or the clowns. But not me, the author.

I never went to another showcase.

It’s hard not to resent the entire world, between requisite social media stunts and circus showcases.

Two things save me:

1. My writing.

2. Kids’ reactions to my writing.

These are the authentic things. These are the things that matter.

(I could bring my cats to visits, but they wouldn’t like it. I could put them in little revolutionary hats – but they really wouldn’t like that.)

 

Imagine this cat in a tri-tipped hat!

 

Instead of resorting to feline slave-labor, I go my own way. Confidently – as Thoreau advised. I’m guided to the people and places who want and appreciate what I have to offer. Or many they’re guided to me. It could be that yin meets yang thing. (If I brought my cats it would be a skin meets fang thing.)

I find my audiences. For my books, and for my visits. There are wonderful parents who seek out quality presentations (they too must steer clear of showcases.) There are also amazing school principals, librarians and of course: teachers. (Who should totally wear capes because they are superheroes!)

Once I did a visit, and afterwards we had an author night at the school. Kids dragged their parents to my table, and demanded my books. One student declared from across the room, pointing at me: “There she is! The great lady!”

I’ll take that.

Here’s to great kids, who don’t need dogs and ponies to be entertained. They just need an enthusiastic, genuine presenter. Not a performer. Not a clown.

I do have clown insurance – but that’s another (ridiculous) story.

And though I engage in my share of marketing, I don’t see rainbow-vomiting in my future.

Bye for now.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Meet Me at the Brooklyn Book Festival: Celebrate Glorious Words!

I’m pleased to share that I’ll be reading my narrative nonfiction picture book BY THE SWORD at The Brooklyn Book Festival Children’s Day – this Saturday (September 19) at 2 pm, booth 20,5 MetroTech Center in Downtown Brooklyn. It’s especially fitting to read this book because it tells the story of the Battle of Long Island — which took place right on that very soil!

This is my book BY THE SWORD, which tells the story of the Battle of Long Island (also known as the Battle of Brooklyn.)

The Battle of Long Island (also called the Battle of Brooklyn) was our first battle following the Declaration of Independence – and it was almost our last. George Washington’s greatest moment was his retreat from the battle – crossing his 10,000 men across the East River to Manhattan using six just whaleboats.

Please read my post from August 27 (the anniversary of the battle) for more about this incredible moment in our nation’s history.

A quote from THE MEMOIR OF COLONEL BENJAMIN TALLMADGE, in which he describes the result of our Declaration Of Independence. Tallmadge is the hero in my nonfiction picture book BY THE SWORD.

I’ll be reading & signing at the Society of Children’s Authors & Illustrators Metro NY chapter booth (#20), along with other wonderful writers.

Here’s the line-up (the booth is open 10-4):

10:15AM Lisa Anchin

11AM Ginger Pate

12PM Melanie Hope Greenberg

1PM Caron Levis

2PM Selene Castrovilla

If you’re interesting in writing for children, come by and learn about our organization! It has been essential in my learning and my career.

I will also be at the SCBWI Metro NY’s booth (#107) on Sunday, September 20. 

Here’s more information about the two-day festival:

Brooklyn Book Festival Children’s Day on Saturday, September 19, 2015 10am—4pm

On Saturday, September 19th, The festival will be held at 5 MetroTech Center in Downtown Brooklyn:

https://www.google.com/maps/place/5+M...

For it’s 10th Anniversary, the Brooklyn Book Festival presents a Children’s Day for children ages 2 – 11. Come enjoy authors and illustrators in readings, performances and workshops as they present cool new and beloved children’s books. Have fun with costumed characters, join music performances, and browse a Children’s Marketplace of booksellers, all in a beautiful urban park setting. Rain or Shine.

Brooklyn Book Festival 2015 on Sunday, Sept. 20, 2015 10am—6pm

The Brooklyn Book Festival is the largest free literary event in New York City, presenting an array of national and international literary stars and emerging authors. One of America’s premier book festivals, this hip, smart diverse gathering attracts thousands of book lovers of all ages to enjoy authors and the festival’s lively literary marketplace.

On Saturday, September 20th, the festival will be held at

Brooklyn Borough Hall and Plaza

209 Joralemon Street, Brooklyn NY 11201

 

Robert Louis Stevenson: A Celebration

You may have noticed that I’ve put more than one Robert Louis Stevenson quote on my Facebook author page. That’s because I’ve decided to celebrate particularly inspirational people by sharing week-long blocks of their quotes! This week, we fete Robert Louis Stevenson.

Stevenson was a brilliant writer, admired by many other writers. G. K. Chesterton said that he “seemed to pick the right word up on the point of his pen.”, Jorge Luis Borges, Bertolt Brecht, Marcel Proust, Arthur Conan Doyle, Henry James, Cesare Pavese, Ernest Hemingway, Rudyard Kipling, Jack London, Vladimir Nabokov, and J. M. Barrie also expressed their respect for his work.

There is much to say about this writing, but The Strange Case of Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde is the work that hits me in my core. It is about the duality of man, who we are all good and evil – and to try and separate them is to come to a horrible end. There is so much to speculate and debate in this work – which is a mark of great literature. It is timeless – another mark. I will not tell you what to think – I merely urge you to read this book, and think for yourselves.

A quote from the book, which describes Dr. Jekyll’s desire to separate the good and evil inside himself.

 

I recently visited an exhibit of paintings by John Singer Sargent, who often painted his friends. One of them was Robert Louis Stevenson. I took these pictures, because I was moved by Sargent’s interpretation of Stevenson (and his wife.) I also enjoyed the descriptions of the paintings.

Notice Stevenson’s quote at the bottom of this description!

And so, I share insights from this great man. I hope you will be inspired by them, and perhaps delve more into the strange, magnificent life of Robert Louis Stevenson.

Still Flipping After All These Years: A Testament to my Favorite Writing Tool

Writer’s Digest was my first dip into the “writing world.” I read it as a teenager, starting with Lawrence Block’s column. I loved the articles on language especially.

Of course, the next step was purchasing writing books. Conveniently, Writer’s Digest offered a myriad of them. (Recently someone returned my copy of Now To Write And Sell Your First Novel.” I told them to keep it (it had been years!) Happily, I no longer need it.

But there’s one Writer’s Digest book that I still need, and always will.

I purchased The Writer’s Digest Flip Dictionary many years ago, and it became indispensable to me. I would drink coffee in the morning while “flipping” for “le mot juste.”

It’s such a great feeling to find that word and plug it into my manuscripts. My friends call me “the verb queen” – and my valet is The Flip Dictionary (its name has been shortened since I purchased it.)

I’ve recommended it to so many people over the years. Last month I was at a retreat, and I told a new friend about it. She mentioned it to someone else I’d told, and they said, “Oh yeah, I have two copies. One for upstairs, and one for downstairs.” It turns out everyone at the retreat had bought it on my recommendation.

I owned a hard cover copy, which my kids scribbled in – due to admiration or jealousy, I’m not sure (probably the latter.) I’d used it so much that the front cover was detached. When Hurricane Sandy was coming, I forgot my book on the coffee table in my living room. It was destroyed, along with my entire first floor. I wrote about the loss of my Flip Dictionary on Facebook, and one of my friends bought me a new one. It’s here, by my side right now. Alas, no scribbles. But I thank God for its beautiful words.

 

The indispensable writer’s tool. Desert island material!

 

Three Things Baba Booey Means to Me

Baba booey is celebrating 25 years, and I remember when it started. I’ve been listening to The Howard Stern Show since I was 16. The first thing that Baba booey means to me is comfort. Baba booey is like home-baked cookies are to some people – because I never got any home-baked cookies. Some of my greatest memories are Stern moments. And when I listen to the old clips – or even when I hear the cry “Baba booey” on the streets – I feel the love. The Stern Show crew is family to me, and even though they are cruel and relentless – they love each other, and their fans. And we love them.

The second thing Baba booey means to me is perseverance. It reminds me of all Gary has endured over the years – the slings and arrows he has taken. And also all of the things Howard has endured. And, finally, all the things I’ve endured and come through. I think we should make a bumper sticker:  “BooeyStrong.” Baba booey teaches us that we can get through the toughest times and challenges, and we will be triumphant as long as we keep going, believing in ourselves and pursuing what matters.

BooeyStrong!

The third thing that Baba booey means to me is the manifestation of man’s duality. Robert Louis Stevenson explored the idea that both good and evil exist in each man,and our lives are a struggle between the two. Baba booey is a singing example of this, for the name can be used gloriously, as when it is chanted in victory or sheer delight. But it can also be used in a derogatory manner: “Oh man, you Bababooeyed.” Baba booey is both divine and shameful. Even the songs go both ways. Some are a celebration, and some are just mean. I don’t like the mean ones, but I understand their necessity. Gary is everyman’s scapegoat, and he’s been battered for 25 years by his boss (Howard is perhaps the poster-child for duality) and millions of people he’s never even met. And yet, it has brought him unimagined fame – which he would never have achieved otherwise, because he is quite bland. Gary by himself is benign (be-noine) – in fact, there is little evidence that the duality exists in him, except for an occasional outburst (“F you, you white a-hole.”) But in the end he takes it, over and over and over – without attacking back. So I guess Baba booey is the story of a boring man who became the piñata everyone bashes. He is Mr. Cellophane. This is The Howard Stern Show at its best: a man with no depth has become the symbol of the depth (and depths) of mankind.

There is so much more I can write, but I’ll leave you with this: My Aunt Olga said that life is heaven and hell in one tough nutshell. And for me, that nutshell is Baba booey.

 

Independence Had Been Declared: Remembering The Battle of Long Island

A quote from THE MEMOIR OF COLONEL BENJAMIN TALLMADGE, in which he describes the result of our Declaration Of Independence

 

Today is the anniversary of The Battle of Long Island, our first battle after The Declaration of Independence was signed. It was a horrendous loss for America. There was really no chance we could have won: we were outnumbered three to one, out-gunned as well – and untrained to boot. It would’ve been our last battle if not for the    fortitude of Commander-In-Chief George Washington, who managed to retreat his remaining troops across the East River in one night. This is a lesson we can all learn from: Never give up! Washington “lost the battle but won the war.” In fact, he lost many battles. But this one is the most amazing to me.

If you’d like to know more about the battle and the retreat, check out my book By The Sword. It tells the true story of Benjamin Tallmadge, a young teacher who gave up his career for the cause. It also deals with his emotions in a very real way that can certain be related to now.

This is my book BY THE SWORD, titled from Benjamin Tallmadge’s quote. Essentially, it describes the reality of what declaring independence meant.

If you’re having a hard day, I can guarantee that The Continental Army’s day was even harder in 1776. Take a moment and think of our troops who guaranteed our liberty, at much cost to them. I wonder what they would say about our country today.

Bye for now.

 

Bastille Day and The Marquis de Lafayette: A Violent Beginning and a Bloody End

I’m reminded that it’s Bastille Day. I have mixed feelings about it, as I do with nearly everything. Apparently I cannot be simple. They celebrate Bastille Day in France like we do our Independence Day, but the storming of the Bastille was the one of the acts that led to unparalleled chaos and bloodshed. It was one of the most inhuman times in history, which is saying a lot.

A portion of the letter Lafayette sent to Washington along with the key to the Bastille, and a picture of what it looked like before he ordered it destroyed.

 

Lafayette was intimately involved with the storming, and he ordered the destruction of the despised prison. He had great intentions. But he was perhaps too innocent, naively believing that they could all just get along. He walked the line between the two groups – aristocracy and commoners – not because he suffered from hubris but because he truly identified with both. He believed he could fix things, because he didn’t know the depth of hatred on one side and the depth of greed on the other. He couldn’t see the darkness of humanity, perhaps because he felt none himself.

Washington treasured the key his adopted son sent him, because of the symbolism behind it. However, he knew resolution would not be simple – if possible. He feared for his adopted son.

Washington knew Lafayette was in trouble with this new revolution, but he couldn’t save his adopted son. So, this is Bastille Day. An end, and a beginning. Comme ça. Perhaps, in the end, it IS that simple. Even if I’m not.

A Dehumanizing Gotcha From the Federal Government

Even though I doubted the government would ever feel sympathy for me and my losses from Hurricane Sandy, I appealed through one of my senators yet again.

Yet again, I was right.

I was technically in the wrong. Or, at least, I was given the wrong advice by my insurance broker following Hurricane Irene. I received $1359.98 for home repair and $109.99 for a dehumidifier after Irene. I was told I needed flood insurance, and I did try to get a quote. But my broker said the insurance couldn’t be in my name until the property was in my name. My aunt passed away, and the house went into probate. So I was waiting for the deed. That’s when Sandy hit.

There was no malice on my part. No conniving. Just someone innocently trying to do the best she could. Over the years since Sandy FEMA told me many things, including the “fact” that once property has had aid, it can “never” have it again. Ever. That made no sense, and apparently they’ve changed their tune and now deny me because I said I was getting flood insurance but didn’t. Well, according to my insurance broker I couldn’t. 

FEMA also now mentions that I applied under first the name “Bayrack” and then the name “Castrovilla.” How nefarious of me. The truth is, I answer to both names. Barack was my maiden name, and somehow my social security number still lists it. When Sandy hit I used Castrovilla – which I often do by accident, because that is the name I go by. I gave my correct social security number. They knew who I was! (And this was not mentioned in all of my appeals until now, when they apparently are running out of excuses not to help me.)

My concern, past my monetary losses, is that the government is playing “gotcha” on a technicality with a citizen who legitimately needs aid. My damages were over $125,000. The money was allocated to help people. Why would they not want to? Isn’t the government supposed to help it’s citizens, instead of saying: “Aha! Gotcha!”

Where is the compassion? We give so much foreign aid. We help disaster victims worldwide. I was struck by one hurricane, then endured the loss of my mother and my aunt and then another hurricane – this one destroying not only my property but my entire community – in just over a year. Why wouldn’t the federal government want to help me?

What I really asked is for New York Rising to drop the requirement that recipients be FEMA- compliant. People deemed “non-compliant” need aid more than anyone. If we didn’t have flood insurance, do we deserve to be condemned? Again, where is the compassion?

I applied for NY Rising early on, and explained my problem with FEMA. I was assured by my case worker that this was a different program, designed to help people like me who “fell between the cracks.” I even received an award letter! But the letters were declared “wrong” and I was told to wait again. And then, I was told that because I was FEMA non-comliant I could not have NY Rising. Apparently someone had changed the rules.

Why wouldn’t there be an amnesty for the people who made mistakes? Criminals are pardoned, even having committed felonies. I didn’t set out to deceive anyone. I had no idea what I was doing, and frankly I still don’t. Because the rules keep changing.

I know many people who received more NY Rising money than they needed, because there were ways to manipulate it. As long as they were FEMA compliant, the world was their oyster. How can so much hinge on one mistake?

I was also not allowed to apply for the $10,000 grant for NY State residents because of my FEMA non-compliance. But I pay taxes in NY state! Why should FEMA have

This is an excerpt from Senator Gilibrand’s response. Of course, the letter didn’t have an actual inked signature, and I doubt she ever looked into the matter at all. Why would my US senator want to waste her time on such an insignificant matter?

anything to do with that grant? There was no way to appeal this, no one to talk to. When I called Governor Cuomo’s office they said that the rule was to be FEMA compliant, and that was that.

I write this because I am appalled by the lack of humanity and mercy displayed by the federal and the NY state government.  To have been treated this way after such tremendous loss was the epitome of insult to injury. Gone is the golden rule, gone are the teachings of all religions. 

Let us hope there will yet be redemption.

 

 

 

 

 

America’s Adopted Son is Celebrated Anew

Happy fourth of July! I wanted to share some of my pictures from my adventures in Yorktown, where I toured the replica of Lafayette’s Hermione – the ti on which he returned to America after convincing the French king to send urgent aid to George Washington.

As you can see, I cannot spin my photos to face the correct way. I also cannot figure out how to upload the majority of the photos. I am a technological failure. I took several classes at the Apple store to no avail – in one ear and out the other. I can remember every moment of Lafayette and Washington’s relationship and other details in history I write books about. But I can’t retain how to upload a photo properly.

C’est la vie.

This is the little boat attached to he Hermione – so cute!

Here’s me doing a selfie on The Hermione. It’s so hard to do those!

This is a Lafayette artifact found on a battleground near Yorktown, lost from Lafayette’s fallen horse (shot from under him) – and found only recently!

 

The stories of the revolution are amazing, and Lafayette’s selflessness is unparalleled. In recognition, places are named after Lafayette all over our country – and he is not on Washington’s adopted son – but ours as well.

This is why I write about The American Revolution. Because we need to herald those who made it possible for us to have our freedom – and we must realize that we are just like them. What’s in our hearts never changes.

Here’s some of the celebration at Yorktown – all celebrating the great Lafayette.

 

Vive Lafayette!

Vive America!

Bye for now.